Late as usual, but yeah. Therapy is a generally a good thing, imo. I'm going back 9/6 after a long hiatus (last session was January '17).
I definitely get the apprehension. I was pretty nervous too on my first visits, but I just tried to remind myself that the therapist is there to help, and that openness and honesty on my part is the best way to facilitate that.
There are bad Discordians, there are bad Christians... there are bad people in each and every religion, methinks. It's when the (vocal) majority under the label give the rest of us a bad name.
It is a quandary.
Especially in a permissive religion like Discordianism, it does allow for, and indeed sometimes encourages misbehavior. A wise Discordian has a better idea when it's appropriate to misbehave than does the initiate, or those who think Chaos is the opposite of Order, confusing it with Disorder (it seems to me that quite a few new "Discordians" miss the point of the philosophy entirely and just want an excuse to spew word salad and incite "chaos.")
At the end of the day, I think religions should enhance life in some way. Discordianism certainly has the potential to do this when it's not being co-opted by destructive / self-destructive asshats, many of whom have fascist agendas. The rest of us, whether we label ourselves Discordian publicly or whether we practice in private, must strive then to be creative / self-creative asshats, with inclination for harmonious-individualist agendas.
I'm not certain that is enough to "save" Discordianism, nor do I suspect it's the only way, or the best way. But it's a way.
That Nenslo quote had a home on my guest room wall for a year or two until recently when my wife bought a bookshelf/desk combo that covered that wall. I may have to find a new home for it one of these days.
It seems to me that you are a cautious, critical thinker, Cram, and on top of that I feel that you have a pretty good safety net when it comes to the community here. That said, I would encourage you to continue your Gurdjieff studies and pay the dues. The caveat being, of course, that I hope you'll elect to hit the eject button as soon as said studies stop seeming beneficial and start seeming rote, obligated, and/or suffocating.