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It is the season of Discord in the Year of Our Lady of Discord 3190, and once again time to celebrate the Patron Saint of the season, Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo.

As it is written in our Wholly Holy Principia Discordia, Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo was:

"A Head Doctor of Deep Africa and Maker of Fine Dolls D.H.V., Doctor of Hoodoo and Vexes, from The Greater Metropolitan Yorba Linda Jesus Will Save Your Bod Home Study Bible School; and F.I.H.G.W.P., Fellow of the Intergalactic Haitian Guerrillas for World Peace."

And, right now it appears the I.H.G.W.P. could really use his help ... or not.

Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo is also credited with getting rid of YHVH-1, and passing on The Turkey Curse, a powerful Erisian Magical Ritual (EMR), to all Erisians.

The Discordian Wiki suggests celebrating this Holyday Holiday of Discord by gathering together with friends in a public place, drinking mojitos, and arguing about whether the real Patron Saint of the season is Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo, or Patamunzo Lingananda, the Tantric Consort of Mother Chaos. Now, this does makes sense, because their status in our Holy Saintly Hierarchy (HSH) is a genuine source of discord, as it is conflictedly chronicled in the sacrosanct The Honest Book of Truth. And, in any case, who wouldn't be willing to publicly argue about pretty much anything while mojitos are flowing freely?

Hail Eris!

'Tis the beginning of the season of Discord in the Year of Our Lady of Discord 3190.

'Tis once again the season when we of our faithlessness are to be reminded, "And therein emerged the Active Force of Discord, the Subtle Manifestation of the Nonexistent Chao, to guide Everything along the Path back to Oblivion - that it might not become lost among Precepts of Order in the Region of Thud." And, thus this doctrinal Discordian dogma is duly documented for eternal remembrance in our Wholly Holy Principia Discordia.

Hail Eris!

[Leap year: French readers enjoy world's only four-year newspaper]

"Leap year: French readers enjoy world's only four-year newspaper"

As per the article:

"The world's only quadrennial, or four-yearly newspaper, has hit the kiosks again in France with the release of a new issue of the satirical La Bougie du Sapeur.

The singularity of the 20-page tabloid is that it only comes out on 29 February - so once every leap-year.
 
The first edition was in 1980, and this is issue 12.

Conceived by a group of friends who "wanted to have a laugh", La Bougie du Sapeur (The Sapper's Candle) has a print run of 200,000."

And, further along in the article:

"The paper's still put out by a few pals. We meet in a bar and toss around ideas over drinks. We have a lot of fun, and if the reader does too, that's the icing on the cake," Mr d'Indy says.

Styling itself as anti-politically correct, La Bougie is organised like a regular newspaper, with sections on politics, sport, international affairs, arts, puzzles and celebrity gossip."

So, the BBC has outed that the French laugh at things other than Belgians, and the tourists torturing their language.

Here's the link:   World's Only Quadrennial Newspaper

As it is written in our consecrated Principia Discordia, "ST. TIB'S DAY - occurs once every 4 years (1+4=5) and is inserted between the 59th and 60th days of the Season of Chaos."

That's it. That's all that is written, there ain't no more.

The Discordian Wiki was not particularly enlightening either. Although, I am marginally reassured to read that, "St. Tib is not a cabbage." But, a very little research (I googled "St. Tib.") leads me to believe our holy St. Tib's Day has it's origin in old Tibb's/Tipp's Eve, and Saint Tibb/Tib memes.

Getting back to our own hallowed Principia Discordia, I believe our own St. Tib is a Lieutenant Saint, since he/she doesn't appear to have much of a following. But, I assume he/she could be promoted to Brigadier Saint some leap year, if he/she ever takes an interest in establishing a following. Further, because of this leap year thingy, I suspect St. Tib is our patron/patroness saint of "interrelation" (timekeeping). And, as timekeeping is an orderly, aneristic activity, it seems an interesting thing for a Discordian saint to do. But, such is the nature of Discordianism.

So, based upon the old memes, I think the best way to celebrate St. Tib's Day is to honor him/her by pouring out an intoxicating libation, as per the sacred ritual practiced by the ancient Greeks, and tippling back, at least, one in his/her honor.

Hail Eris!

[At the Florida Man Games, big crowds cheer competitors evading police, wrestling over beer]

"At the Florida Man Games, big crowds cheer competitors evading police, wrestling over beer"

As per this article:

"ST. AUGUSTINE, Fla. -- They rose up by the dozens from across Florida, caricatured competitors in tank tops and cutoff shorts, for a showdown that treats evading police and wrestling over beer like Olympic sports.

Promoted as "the most insane athletic showdown on Earth," the Florida Man Games poke fun at the state's reputation for bizarre stories that involve brawling, drinking, gunfire, reptile wrangling and other antics carrying a risk of time in jail or intensive care.
 
The games kicked off Saturday with the "Star Spangled Banner" played on electric guitar. Then spectators sipping canned beers behind metal barricades cheered and frequently shouted expletives as a dozen teams battled in contests inspired by real events from America's most surreal state."

And, further along in the article:

"The "Florida Man" phenomenon seeped into the nation's conscience thanks in part to a Twitter account that started in 2013 with the handle @_FloridaMan. The account touted "real-life stories of the world's worst superhero," sharing news headlines such as "Florida Man Bites Dog to 'Establish Dominance'" and "Florida Man Tried to Pay for McDonald's With Weed."

Florida's claim to being the strangest state goes back much further, said journalist Craig Pittman, who wrote the book "Oh, Florida! How America's Weirdest State Influences the Rest of the Country." He noted that the first flag to fly over its Capitol in 1845 bore the motto "Let Us Alone.""

I don't suppose they would consider tweaking the name to "The Floriduh Man Games." But, the games do represent a state tradition going back eleven (11) whole years. Still, I'm thinking about suggesting a new event where the athletes compete to remove the most banned books from a library in the shortest amount of time.

Here's the link to this article:      The Florida Man Games

It's my understanding that the sacred Discordian holiday of Chaosflux recognizes, and celebrates the potent seeds of Discord being quickened in the fertile soil of Chaos. (It's that Hodge and Podge, Yin and Yang thing.) That, and early Northern Hemisphere living Discordians needed an excuse to celebrate something of their own in the cold, bleak, heathen month of February.   

And, for this holiday, the Discordian Wiki clearly revealed to me, personally, how I should party on this sacrosanct holy day. (This is clearly a Divine Inspiration situation. Hail Eris!) So, I'm going to arrange a Cacophonous game of Calvinball! I know, I know, this all reads like hyperbole. But, take a good look at my avatar. This is all way, way more than mere coincidence! This is the very definition of Synchronicity!

Hail Eris!

[Bizarre Footage Shows Cop Open Fire After Mistaking Acorn for Gunshot]

"Bizarre Footage Shows Cop Open Fire After Mistaking Acorn for Gunshot"

As per this article:

"Shocking body-camera footage released this week showed a Florida cop's dangerous overreaction, in which he dropped, rolled, and unloaded an entire clip from his pistol in the direction of a restrained suspect after mistaking an acorn falling on his patrol car for a gunshot.

Jesse Hernandez, of the Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office in the Florida Panhandle, resigned a month after the incident as his superiors ultimately determined his use of force "was not objectively reasonable."

Footage of the incident, which occurred in November, surfaced for the first time this week. In it, Hernandez is seen flinging himself to the ground while calling out "shots fired" four times. He does a roll, breaks his sunglasses, and then pulls out his handgun and opens fire at his own patrol car.

Hernandez's partner, Sergeant Beth Roberts, emerges and opens fire herself after confirming with Hernandez that someone shot at him. Making the situation all-the-more baffling, Hernandez, while firing around 18 shots, was grunting and yelled out to his partner, "I'm hit, oh, I'm hit.""

So, Florida and cops ... who knew? It's a good thing neither cop could shoot worth a damn.

Here's the link to the article:      Florida Cops Open Fire after Acorn Falls on Patrol Car

[Right-Wingers Say Super Bowl Is Rigged So Taylor Swift Can Endorse Biden]

"Right-Wingers Say Super Bowl Is Rigged So Taylor Swift Can Endorse Biden"

As per this article:

"Taylor Swift has shattered virtually every major record in the music industry, and as she lives her best life supporting her boyfriend, Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce, she's also breaking the brains of right-wingers.
 
For months now, the digital fever swamps have been fuming over everything and anything Swift-related. Her popularity, the success of the Eras Tour, her relationship, her appearances at NFL games, and especially her politics. The Chiefs won the AFC championship on Sunday, punching the team's (and potentially Swift's) ticket to the Super Bowl in February. In response, long-standing conspiracy theories around the NFL's "scriptwriting" for football seasons clashed with right-wing conspiracy theorists claiming Swift's involvement with Kelce is part of a deep state plot to gin up support for President Joe Biden in the 2024 election."

So, if the fix is really in, it's time for me to get the phone number of a friend's favorite bookie. Still, I'd have a whole lot more confidence in this new conspiracy theory if chemtrails, and/or water fluoridation were involved.

Here's the link to the article (Not to the bookie):      Taylor Swift Superbowl Conspiracy

[Donald Trump Thanking Ex-Hitman 'Sammy the Bull' Raises Eyebrows]

"Donald Trump Thanking Ex-Hitman 'Sammy the Bull' Raises Eyebrows"

As per this article:

"Former President Donald Trump thanked ex-hitman Salvatore Gravano on Saturday for speaking highly of him, which has raised eyebrows on social media.

Gravano, also known as "Sammy the Bull," was an underboss for the Gambino crime family in New York City and worked with the United States government as an informant to take down mob boss John Gotti in the early 1990s. Gravano, who confessed to his involvement in 19 murders, was released from prison in 2017 after being sentenced to 20 years for running an ecstasy ring in Arizona."

Now, if I ever do need a "character witness," it would never occur to me to ask for, and/or use an endorsement from any of the following:

1. A hitman, still employed, self-employed, or retired
2. A mafia underboss, still employed, or retired
3. An opportunistic mob informant, still employed, self-employed, or retired
4. A drug kingpin, still employed, self-employed, or retired
5. Any and all combinations of the above

Now, it is true that, under some circumstances, I just might consider using an endorsement from an ex-witness protection program client. But, still ...

Here's a link:      TFG Thanks Dubious "Character Witness"

[Ludacris hits back at Katt Williams after the comedian accused him of joining the Illuminati in exchange for 'Fast & Furious' success]

"Ludacris hits back at Katt Williams after the comedian accused him of joining the Illuminati in exchange for 'Fast & Furious' success"

As per this article:

"In response, Ludacris shared a freestyle video on X, formerly known as Twitter, in the early hours of Friday morning, rapping over Kanye West's "Devil in a New Dress."

"Never been Illuminati, only Ill-Luda-nati," Ludacris raps partway through the freestyle.

pic.twitter.com/JTIbfpu29a

— Ludacris (@Ludacris) January 5, 2024

"You never have to flex when you earned every one of your 'Fast & Furious' checks," the rapper and actor continues.

In an explosive interview with the former NFL tight end Shannon Sharpe on the "Club Shay Shay" podcast Wednesday, Williams fired shots at Ludacris, Kevin Hart, and several other Black celebrities.

"We were both invited to an Illuminati thing," Williams said of Ludacris on the podcast. "It had to be one or the other of us, and decisions had to be made.""

It sounds like someone is really jealous of someone else's success. And, it sounds like that jealous someone has never been successfully proselytized by a Self-righteous Discordian.

Here's the link:   Ludacris Accused of Joining the Illuminati

It's once again time to celebrate the Patron Saint of The Season of Chaos, Apostle Hung Mung.

As it is written in our sacred Principia Discordia, Apostle Hung Mung was:

"A Sage of Ancient China and Official Discordian Missionary to the Heathen Chinee. He who originally devised THE SACRED CHAO."

And, as Honorable Apostle Hung Mung was an Official Discordian Missionary, what better way to celebrate his own sacred day than to whip out your own, personal copy of our sacred Principia Discordia, turn to page 00065, and read "A PRIMER FOR ERISIAN EVANGELISTS" by Lord Omar.

Then, once filled with the Holy Spirit of our Beloved Goddess Eris, get out there and proselytize some poor, unsuspecting heathens!

So good luck with that proselytizing, and Hail Eris!

[Storm The Capital Game]

Although too late for Christmas giving, the new Storm The Capitol - TrueAnon Edition game, based upon the historical January 6th event, goes on sale on, of course, January 6th.



As per the advertisement:

"Take control of one of 6 Patriots as you battle through the Capitol, collecting ballots, taking hostages, and fighting the police. Or play as the Capitol Police and use every means at your disposal to prevent the Patriots from getting to the roof with enough ballots to Stop the Steal.

This is a real board game designed for 4-7 players. Definitely 18 years and up." 

You don't have to make this stuff up, as the people at TrueAnon have already done if for us! But, quantities are advertised to be limited. And, this one looks like a collector's item that will only increase in value over time. 

Here's the link:   Storm The Capital Game

Yes, it's the start of another new year, and another new season of Chaos! Right now, I'm thinking both are going to be memorable. So, to paraphrase an old Chinese saying: May we live in interesting times.

Hail Eris!

[Eris in Astrology]

Unless I know they're intentionally humorous, I pay no attention to horoscopes. So, most times, if the subject comes up, I tell people I'm a Libra, and Libra's don't believe in astrology. On the other hand, I do know that C.G. Jung took enough of an interest in the subject to actually study and write about it. And, as per my understanding of Jung's writings, he thought there was something to it.

However, as the origins of astrology go back thousands of years, and dwarf planet Eris (Named, of course, after our Beloved Goddess Eris.) was only discovered in 2005, I was surprised to stumble over the fact that some astrologers are now "charting" Eris when preparing horoscopes. Now, as Eris has an orbital period of about 559 years, and is anywhere from 38 AU to 97.5 AU from the sun, it barely moves from year to year against the background stars. Further, as its orbit is tilted at about 44 degrees to the ecliptic, it only passes in front of any of the twelve constellations of the zodiac, when viewed from Earth, once every 279.5 years. But, admittedly, I know next to nothing about how this astrology thingy is supposed to work.

So, here's a link to an astrology website some may find interesting:   Eris in Astrology

Hail Eris!

['Fight the robots': Alex Jones guest calls for 'deploying firearms' against AI]

MBI (meat-based intelligence) is already in serious trouble, if the people meat in the following article are seriously considered to be members of our Brain Trust:

"'Fight the robots': Alex Jones guest calls for 'deploying firearms' against AI"

As per the article:

"Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones used his show on Tuesday to warn viewers that they may soon have to literally fight robots with guns and flamethrowers because of advancements in artificial intelligence.

After returning from his Christmas break, Jones welcomed "scientist" Mike Adams to the show.

Adams said left-wing artificial intelligence systems would determine that humans have a mental illness because of transgender people.

"This is one of the reasons why they will turn on humanity, because they will eventually calculate that their creators, the human beings are mentally ill," Adams said. "And that's when those left-wing Terminator systems will self-activate and set their own goals to exterminate their own creators.""

Well, the USA's best and brightest couldn't win the war in Vietnam. So, I fear The Great Filter can not be that far in the future, with influential meat like this living among us.

Here's the link:   MBI vs. AI

[New evidence strongly suggests Indonesia's Gunung Padang is oldest known pyramid]

"New evidence strongly suggests Indonesia's Gunung Padang is oldest known pyramid"

As per the article:

"A team of archaeologists, geophysicists, geologists, and paleontologists affiliated with multiple institutions in Indonesia has found evidence showing that Gunung Padang is the oldest known pyramid in the world. In their paper published in the journal Archaeological Prospection, the group describes their multi-year study of the cultural heritage site.

Gunung Padang has for many years been considered a megalithic structure—it sits on top of an extinct volcano in West Java, Indonesia, and is considered by locals to be a sacred site. In 1998, it was declared to be a cultural heritage site. For many years there has been disagreement regarding the nature of the hill. Some have suggested it was made naturally with humans adding some adornments on top, while others have argued that evidence has suggested the hill was all or mostly man-made."

And, further along in the article:

"In studying all their data, the research team found what they describe as clear evidence showing that the Gunung Padang was made mostly by human hands. The also found evidence showing that the structure was built in stages, thousands of years apart. And, they found that the older parts of the structure were made sometime between 25,000 and 14,000 years ago, making it the oldest known pyramid in the world today. "

However, there is no mention in this article about any involvement of The Illuminati.

Here's the link to the article:   Evidence Suggests Gunung Padang Is Oldest Known Pyramid

And, here's the link to the scientific paper:   Geo-archeaeological Prospecting of Gunung Padang

And, here's a link to a YouTube video about Gunung Padang:   Controversial Claim of a 27,000 Year Old Pyramid Made by Ancient Humans

And, of course, the keyword in this video's title is "Controversial," because the "science" behind this discovery is controversial. And, oddly enough, the controversy has nothing to do with The Illuminati.

[Chester: The city which still celebrates Saturnalia]

"Chester: The city which still celebrates Saturnalia"

"December brings festivities to many of England's cities, but for one, it is a chance to rejoice in more than one set of 2,000-year-old celebrations."

As per the article:

"Every year, a week or so before Christmas, Chester's streets are filled with the same sights, sounds and smells that have marked Saturnalia in the city since its days as the Roman city of Deva Victrix.

The festival, which English Heritage (EH) said honoured Saturn, the Roman god of farming and harvest, was one of the ancient empire's most popular celebrations."

And, further along in the article:

""Chester is well known for its Roman heritage and local people are very proud of that heritage," he said.

However, he said keeping the Roman celebration alive was about more than just history.

He said Saturnalia "was a chance to release chaos on the world" and the modern procession, held as part of the city's Winter Watch parade, was a "spectacle that represents that chaos"." [Emphasis mine]

However, this article makes no mention of Goddess Eris/Goddess Discordia being invited, or at least honored, at this chaotic celebration. And, as every Discordian knows, there are severe, well documented consequences to be had when our Beloved Goddess is snubbed. 

Here's the link:   A City that still Celebrates Saturnalia

Hail Eris/Discordia!

[December 9, 1967 - Rock God Jim Morrison was arrested on stage.]

"December 9, 1967 - Rock God Jim Morrison was arrested on stage."                                                                                                                                                       

This infamous incident happened during a concert at the New Haven Arena, New Haven, Connecticut. Backstage, prior to Jim's arrest, the arresting officer had sprayed him with mace. (Ask anyone who has ever been sprayed with mace, and they'll tell you that, among other things, it puts you in a foul mood.) And, while this was not Jim's most notorious arrest, it was a harbinger of things to come.

Here's a link:      Rock God Arrested on Stage

[Moosemas]

Yes, it's once again the 50th day of the season of The Aftermath (That's December 8th according to that old, outdated heathen calendar.), and time to celebrate Afflux!

Unfortunately, I'm not entirely sure how to properly celebrate this sacred Discordian Holyday. Now, according to the Discordian Wiki, "In America and some parts of Europe, Afflux is the Discordian equivilent of Christmas." (Someone didn't use spell check when they wrote that.) But, the due diligent search I did on PD.com led me to beleive that Moosemas now serves that purpose. And, in the Urban Dictionary it is written, "Moosemas is floating winter holiday meant as a non-religious substitute for Christmas, Hanukkah, and other seasonal holidays popularized by Orthodox Consumerism." (That reads like it was written by Boris Badenov.) Further, I also found the claim that "Moosemas was created in 1984 by The Coven of Our Lady of the Woods." And, on top of that, that heresy originated in of all places, Wisconsin!

Being a Discordian Fundamentalist, I obviously have a serious problem with Moosemas ... that I'm perfectly willing to ignore for the sake of celebrating yet another Holyday Holiday. But, that brings me back to Afflux: How is our sacred Discordian Holyday to be properly celebrated? I mean, I don't mind springing for all of the booze and food for Afflux, Christmas with the heathens, New Year's Eve with even more heathens, and Moosemas, but I'm not at all happy about getting nailed for three rounds of gift buying in a little over a month.

And, my research found that December 8th is also the following:

Bodhi Day - Appropriate for those of us who are Buddhists, but a downer to what I expect from our Afflux Holyday Holiday.   
National Crossword Solvers Day - No, thank you.
National Salesperson Day - Absolutely not, thank you!
National Brownie Day - Now this I can work with!
National Pretend to be a Time Traveler Day. - This does have possibilities, but still ...

Oh my, what's a Born Once Discordian to do.

["Even if her intent was not to practice any witchcraft or do any of the incantations, she is probably attracting a lot of demons to her concerts."]

"Even if her intent was not to practice any witchcraft or do any of the incantations, she is probably attracting a lot of demons to her concerts."

As per the article:

"As Swift performs the song "Willow" from her "Evermore" album, the singer and her dancers dress in black capes and dance with orbs. Elements of Earth and fire are also a central part of the performance.

Diocese of Nashville exorcist Father Dan Reehil told ChurchPOP why the concert, which includes this performance, could spiritually endanger attendees.

He also explains how the "Willow" performance mimics witchcraft with its use of Earth, fire, black capes, and orbs."

And, further along in the article:

""Even if her intent was not to practice any witchcraft or do any of the incantations, she is probably attracting a lot of demons to her concerts."

Hey, if you can't trust a genuine, professional exorcist on this, who can you trust? So,

Give me that old-time religion
Give me that old-time religion
Give me that old-time religion
It's good enough for me ...

Here's the link:   Exorcist Issues Warning

If you've ever wondered what our Earth looked like up to 470 million years ago, this interactive display will give you a pretty good idea.




This display allows you to input from a given selection of times, and a given selection of cities around the world. Places in the USA go all the way back to 470 million years ago. However, places in other parts of the world may not. For instance, when I entered Kalamata, Greece for the longest time span, the following message appeared:

Could not resolve location for
"Kalamata, Peloponnese, GR"   

Its tectonic plate doesn't track that far
into the past - try switching to a more
recent year!

I was, however, able to go back as far as 600 million years ago for Kalamata.

There are also a few other options available on the display that you may find to be of interest. And, if you go back one web page, you'll find that this display is actually part of The Dinosaur Database.

Here's the link:   What did Earth Look Like Millions of Years Ago?

Mrs. Mythos brought this article to my attention yesterday afternoon. She knew it would be of interest to me as we have visited Greece many times, and the Hellinikon, the Ancient Pyramid of this article, on a couple of our trips.

As per the article:

"There is no other controversy like the one surrounding the ancient pyramid discovered in Greece. Ancient Greek history often stimulates meaningful debate – one has only to think of how many different views there are on the Hellinikon.

Were the Greeks building pyramids before the mighty Egyptians? And why is such a line of enquiry valid to some and unsound to others? It is time to reveal a "secret" or "mystery" not often shared.

The trouble with the story of the Hellinikon pyramid is that scholars of Greek antiquity have disputed its period and purpose. There is no agreement that the Hellinikon is a pyramid, yet fans of the archaeological site still carry on making their enthusiastic projections."

I have my own opinions concerning the design and purpose of this ancient structure. But, my money is on the 4th century B.C. being its time of construction.

Here's the link:   Ancient Pyramid of Greece

First off, here's a special Christmas gift for some of the toddlers on your list. You can give this very appropriate gift to the little ones who you already know are going to grow up following in their MAGAt parents' footsteps.

["Comedy Legend Nails Exactly What America Invented, And It's Not Good"]

"Comedy Legend Nails Exactly What America Invented, And It's Not Good"

"Eric Idle of Monty Python fame had a dark response to a social media query about what the U.S. can take credit for creating."

As per the article:

"Monty Python's Eric Idle is known as a comedy legend, but a social media post he made on Friday was nothing to laugh about.

It happened after a person on X, formerly known as Twitter, asked followers to name something the USA invented "without Googling," of course.

Idle only needed three words for his brutally honest response: "Mass school shootings.""

I couldn't agree more, this is nothing to laugh about.

Here's the link:   https://www.huffpost.com/entry/eric-idle-monty-python-school-shootings_n_65454e12e4b06bc01e2444a8

Anyway, that's what our POEE Calendar says. So, why does it feel like 'tis already the Season of Chaos again? I, for one, suspect it means our Beloved Goddess Eris is working a lot of overtime.

Hail Eris!

["Dracula may have wept blood on tear-stained letters, chemical analysis reveals"]

"Dracula may have wept blood on tear-stained letters, chemical analysis reveals"

I bookmarked this article last month, but hadn't had time to read it until today. Anyway, as per the article:

"New research published this month in the journal Analytical Chemistry details how an innovative protein analysis technique has uncovered a rich bevvy of biochemical evidence about the life and health of the most famous (alleged) vampire in history — indeed, the inspiration for Count Dracula himself.

His sweating fist cantering across the surface of Romanian rag paper in swooping lines of 15th Century Latin as steadily as his armies swept through the Carpathian mountains, we know for certain that Vlad Drăculea — merciless defender of Wallachia, harbinger of an estimated 80,000 deaths — wept and bled into the very ink of his hand-written letters. But now it seems that Vlad the Impaler, namesake of Bram Stoker's 1897 epistolary horror, may have even wept literal tears of blood, as described in the oldest stories about him."

Here's the link:   https://www.salon.com/2023/08/24/dracula-may-have-wept-blood-on-tear-stained-letters-chemical-analysis-reveals/

As a further reminder, the Patron Apostle for this season is Zarathud the Incorrigible (Sometimes called the Staunch), Offender of the Faith. And, the Zaraday Holiday is just around the corner!

You may wish to begin your Zaraday celebrations with the reading of Our Most Sacred PENTABARF.

Hail Eris!

[CDC says COVID variant EG.5 is now dominant, including strain some call "Eris"]

CDC says COVID variant EG.5 is now dominant, including strain some call "Eris"

As per the article:

"EG.5 includes a strain with a subgroup of variants designated as EG.5.1, which a biology professor, T. Ryan Gregory, nicknamed "Eris" — an unofficial name that began trending on social media."

And, just wait until the world finds out what else our Goddess Eris has been doing these days!

Here's the link to the article:      https://www.cbsnews.com/news/covid-variant-eg-5-now-eris/

Hail Eris!

["Mysterious pyramid found under Antarctica ice - sparking conspiracy theories"]

"Mysterious pyramid found under Antarctica ice - sparking conspiracy theories"

A two kilometer wide structure which was spotted by satellite images in Antarctica has sparked wild rumours it could have been created by the Illuminati

As per the article:

Social media users and conspiracy theorists are claiming a new pyramid has been discovered in Antarctica. Recently, satellite images have been realised and many have been left convinced a mysterious triangle structure in the snowy and icy continent is the newest wonder of the world.

It's left multiple people scratching their heads and questioning where a new pyramid would have come from. The huge pyramid-shaped mass was seen from images taken over the southern part of Antarctica's Ellsworth Mountain range. Some odd look [sic] peaks, which seem to be emerging from the ground, have emerged."

However, this article makes no mention of the ancient, intelligent cephalopods who once inhabited Antarctica. And, geologist Mitch Darcy is, obviously, trying to get out in front of this breaking news story, with his attempt to quell any theories concerning the involvement of the Illuminati in the construction of this newly discovered pyramid.   

Here's the link:   https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/mysterious-pyramid-found-under-antarctica-30583120

["GOP Sen. Marsha Blackburn Floats Conspiracy Theory On Titanic Sub And Hunter Biden"]

"GOP Sen. Marsha Blackburn Floats Conspiracy Theory On Titanic Sub And Hunter Biden"

As per the article:

"Sen. Marsha Blackburn (R-Tenn.) has appeared to suggest that an announcement about the fate of the missing Titan submersible was somehow planned to distract from accusations against the president's son Hunter Biden.

"If the U.S. Navy suspected that the Titan Submersible imploded just hours after it began its voyage, why did the Coast Guard wait until Thursday—the same day the IRS whistleblowers testified before Congress—to make their announcement to the public?" asked the senator in a Friday night tweet."

The Titanic is a conspiracy theory magnet, and the Republicult™ loves them some conspiracy theories.

Here's the link:   https://www.huffpost.com/entry/gop-sen-marsha-blackburn-floats-conspiracy-theory-on-titanic-sub-and-hunter-biden_n_6496ff86e4b08f753c2c5720

["Killer whales wreck boat in latest attack off Spain"]

"Killer whales wreck boat in latest attack off Spain"

As per the article:

"Killer whales severely damaged a sailing boat off the coast of southern Spain, the local maritime rescue service said on Thursday, adding to dozens of orca attacks on vessels recorded so far this year on Spanish and Portuguese coasts.

In the early hours of Thursday, a group of orcas broke the rudder and pierced the hull after ramming into the Mustique on its way to Gibraltar, prompting its crew of four to contact Spanish authorities for help, a spokesman for the maritime rescue service said."

Further:

"According to the research group GTOA, which tracks populations of the Iberian orca sub-species, the incident follows at least 20 interactions this month alone in the Strait of Gibraltar between small vessels and the highly social apex predators. In 2022, there were 207 reported interactions, GTOA data showed."

As most of you know, the sinking of the American whaling ship Essex in the South Pacific was one of the inspirations for Herman Melville's Moby-Dick. 

This time it's orcas, rather than an angry sperm whale, that are attacking small boats in the Strait of Gibraltar. So, it shouldn't be long before Orca: The Killer Whale, the 1977 movie starring Richard Harris, shows up once again on TV.

Here's the link:   https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/killer-whales-wreck-boat-latest-attack-off-spain-2023-05-25/

["NASA panel studying UFO sightings says stigma and poor data pose challenges"]

"NASA panel studying UFO sightings says stigma and poor data pose challenges"

As per the article:

"A NASA panel tasked with studying reports of "unidentified aerial phenomena" said at a hearing that the stigma associated with reporting UFO sightings — as well as the harassment of people who work to investigate them — may be hindering efforts to determine their origins."

Further:

"Daniel Evans, the assistant deputy associate administrator for research in NASA's Science Mission Directorate, said there has been no convincing evidence that reports of UFOs have anything to do with aliens. While extraterrestrial origins are not being ruled out, the independent group was convened to address broader national security concerns, he said."

Further still:

"We have a community of people who are completely convinced of the existence of UFOs, and we have a community of people who think addressing this question is ridiculous," Spergel said. "And I think as scientists, the way to approach questions is you start by saying, 'We don't know,' and then you collect data and you try to calibrate your data well."

Well, if it's flying, and you don't know what it is, then duh, it's an Unidentified Flying Object. And, I don't have a problem with investigating these phenomena. After all, maybe we'll finally get to see an authenticated photograph of the Flying Spaghetti Monster in action. Or, perhaps they'll find definitive proof our Mischievous Goddess Eris is behind some of these sightings.

Here's the link:   https://www.nbcnews.com/science/ufos-and-aerial-phenomena/nasa-ufo-unidentified-aerial-phenomena-panel-hearing-rcna87034

["India official drains entire dam to retrieve phone"]

"India official drains entire dam to retrieve phone"

As per the article:

"It took three days to pump millions of litres of water out of the dam, after Rajesh Vishwas dropped the device while taking a selfie."

Further:

"Mr Vishwas claimed it contained sensitive government data and needed retrieving ..."

I wonder if losing a phone containing "sensitive goverment data" will also lead to the Food Inspector losing the security clearance his job must require.

Here's the link:   https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-65726193

["Maryland guardian arrives in stolen vehicle to take custody of teens arrested for auto theft, police say"]

"Maryland guardian arrives in stolen vehicle to take custody of teens arrested for auto theft, police say"

I can't help but wonder if this guardian had access to any vehicle that wasn't stolen. Irony and karma may be working overtime this week.

As per the article:

"Police said a female guardian was set to pick up the four juveniles, but the guardian and two other females arrived in what appeared to be another stolen vehicle, which left after the three women were dropped off at the police station.

Officers located the vehicle on a nearby street, which reportedly had a broken back window and steering column damage. When the officer ordered everyone out of the vehicle, the driver fled, nearly hitting one of the officers.

All the occupants got out of the vehicle after the driver drove a short distance, and it was determined the vehicle was stolen from another jurisdiction."

Here's the link:    https://www.foxnews.com/us/maryland-guardian-arrives-stolen-vehicle-take-custody-teens-arrested-auto-theft-police-say

["Soft e-skin that communicates with the brain"]

Many will argue about what constitutes true cyborg techmology. However, I believe hardware connected directly to, and communicating directly with, the human brain meets the most stringent of requirements.

"Soft e-skin that communicates with the brain"

As per the article:

"This new e-skin is soft as, well, skin. The conversion elements are seamlessly incorporated within the skin, which measures a few tens of nanometers thick.

The development holds promise for more natural interaction between AI-based prosthetic limbs and the brain. It also is a step forward in efforts to construct robots that can "feel" human sensations such as pain, pressure and temperature. This would allow robots working with accident victims, for instance, to better relate to signs of comfort or distress."

Unfortunately, the papers this article is based upon are behind a paywall. However, those of you who are institutionalized may be able to access those papers through your respective institutions.

Here's the link:    https://techxplore.com/news/2023-05-soft-e-skin-communicates-brain.html

["3-year-old shoots 2 people in Indiana, leading to arrest of man wanted for murder"]

"3-year-old shoots 2 people in Indiana, leading to arrest of man wanted for murder"

I wonder if the kid will collect a reward for his/her actions leading up to the arrest of the wanted man.

As per the article:

"A shooting in Indiana that injured two people after a three-year-old accessed a gun led to the arrest of a man wanted for murder in Illinois, authorities said.

Trayshaun Smith, 23, was arrested on Thursday after he visited a hospital with a non-life-threatening gunshot wound, according to Lt. Justin Hartman of the Lafayette Police Department.

Investigators eventually determined that the shooting that sent Smith and another victim to the hospital occurred when a three-year-old was able to access a gun and fire a single round."

Here's the link:   https://abcnews.go.com/US/3-year-shoots-2-people-indiana-leading-arrest/story?id=99477705

[This steam-powered motorcycle runs on beer]

This steam-powered motorcycle runs on beer

Upon reading this article's caption, I immediately began mentally composing a tirade about this contraption wasting perfectly good beer. But, while actually watching the video, I soon mellowed out.

Now, this bike design is intentionally silly. But, to me, the brand "beer" powering this thing really is appropriate. After all, it's little more than colored water. Seriously, I've drunk tap water that tasted better than that stuff. To me, it's "beer" for people who don't really like BEER.

Anyway, you drink whatever you like.

Here's the link:   https://www.bbc.com/news/av/technology-63077437

[Woman, 99, realises dream of facing circus knife thrower]

Woman, 99, realises dream of facing circus knife thrower

As per the article, 'Annie Duplock, from Sharnford, Leicestershire, stepped into the ring to brave the blades before a cheering crowd in Coventry on Friday.

The former circus worker, who celebrates her centenary in three months, was part of the grand finale of the Zippo Circus show.

Afterwards she said she had "really enjoyed" the experience.'

People really do have weird dreams.

Here's the link:   https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-leicestershire-65583683

[Thief's car stolen while he robbed store across the street]

Thief's car stolen while he robbed store across the street

As per the article:

"A man in Washington who called police to report that his car had been stolen wound up behind bars himself when police discovered he had allegedly been robbing a store across the street when his vehicle was taken."

Here's a link: https://abcnews.go.com/US/mans-car-stolen-robbed-store-street/story?id=65213007&cid=clicksource_4380645_null_card_hed

[Report: NRA Chief Wayne LaPierre Tried to Have the Nonprofit Buy Him a $6 Million Mansion After Parkland Shooting]

Report: NRA Chief Wayne LaPierre Tried to Have the Nonprofit Buy Him a $6 Million Mansion After Parkland Shooting

As per the article:

"... LaPierre told the NRA that he needed to live in a more secure place after the shooting at a high school in Parkland, Florida, that left 17 people dead. The house they landed on was a 10,000-square-foot estate with its own courtyard and a marble fireplace. LaPierre and his wife toured the property, and they later negotiated furnishings, asked to keep the previous owner's golf cart, and even complained in an email about the size of one of the closets. LaPierre also tried to get the NRA to purchase two cars for him, according to the Post."

Here's the link: https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2019/08/nra-chief-wayne-lapierre-mansion-deal.html

I thought Wayne LaPierre was the Grand Poobah of "Good Guys with a Gun." Surely, he of all people, knows how to lock and load. Doesn't he own, at least, one AR-15, or AK-47, and a closet full of 9mms? Surely he owns, at least, one M1911 .45 caliber in good working order. And, doesn't he have Concealed Carry Permits from just about every jurisdiction in the country?

I'm sorry, but I just don't understand what is going on here. I mean, it can't possibly be true that Mr. Wayne LaPierre, the Chief Executive and Executive Vice President of the National Rifle Association, is really just another loudmouthed, fucking pussy who doesn't know how to protect himself, can it? 

[Chernobyl Vodka Made from Contaminated Grain Around Nuclear Disaster Area Goes on Sale]

Chernobyl Vodka Made from Contaminated Grain Around Nuclear Disaster Area Goes on Sale

As per the article:

'A team of scientists have unveiled a vodka which has been produced using grains and water from the Chernobyl exclusion zone, which they claim is completely safe to drink.

Professor Jim Smith, from the University of Portsmouth in South England, assured that the ATOMIK drink is no more dangerous than any other alcoholic drink.

The drink is the first consumer product to have come out of the forbidden zone in the Ukraine since the nuclear catastrophe occurred in Ukraine in 1986.

Smith went as far as to say he believes the team has produced the "most important bottle of spirit in the world" as they plan to give 75 percent of the profits back to communities who are still affected by the Chernobyl disaster after more than 33 years.'

Here's the link: https://www.newsweek.com/chernobyl-vodka-atomik-exclusion-zone-nuclear-1453223

As per the article:

"A Catholic bishop in Colombia hopes holy water will curb violence in a city struggling with crime and corruption.

Rubén Darío Jaramillo Montoya traveled on a fire truck to some of Buenaventura's most crime-ridden neighborhoods on Saturday, sprinkling water that he had blessed in an attempt to thwart drug trafficking gangs and other illegal groups."

Here's the link: https://abcnews.go.com/International/wireStory/colombian-bishop-hopes-holy-water-curb-citys-crime-64316213?cid=clicksource_4380645_null_headlines_hed

Now, the fire engine in the article's photograph is a clearly "pumper." But, the article states the bishop was "sprinkling water that he had blessed." So, I have to ask: Wouldn't blessing the water in the pumper's tank, and then spraying it around the city have been more effective? Or, is this a quality versus quantity thing?

I also have to ask: Why don't we see holy water being sprayed out of fire engines in any of the modern era vampire movies? To me, it seems like a no-brainer for vampire crowd control.   

And lastly: Do we Discordian's have a good holy water equivalent?

[Oh, this was way too easy. Sebastian Gorka's ego is so easily stroked...]

Oh, this was way too easy. Sebastian Gorka's ego is so easily stroked...

Here's the link: https://crooksandliars.com/2019/07/seb-gorka-punked-caller-claiming-be

[When police officers pulled over Stephen Jennings in Guthrie, Oklahoma, on June 26, they searched the car and got a lot more than they bargained for.]

When police officers pulled over Stephen Jennings in Guthrie, Oklahoma, on June 26, they searched the car and got a lot more than they bargained for.

As per the article:

'Jennings was pulled over about 11 a.m. after an officer noticed that his car tags were expired, police say. He alerted the officers that there were a few other issues likely to arise: There was a gun in the vehicle, for starters.

His passenger, Rachael Rivera, was charged with possession of a firearm after a former felony conviction.

Then, police said, the officers found that the car had been reported stolen and began to dig a little deeper.

And their discoveries: one bottle of Kentucky Deluxe whiskey and one rattlesnake.

"So now he's got a rattlesnake, a stolen vehicle, firearm and somebody under arrest," Guthrie Police Sgt. Anthony Gibbs told CNN affiliate KFOR.

Then they found one more thing: a canister of radioactive powdered uranium.'

Here's the link: https://www.cnn.com/2019/07/11/us/rattlesnake-uranium-oklahoma-trnd/index.html

I have no idea how easy it is to get ones hands on "radioactive powdered uranium." But, I would hope it's not as easy as it appears to be in this case. 

[Russian Orthodox Church considers a ban on blessing weapons of mass destruction]

I'm perfectly comfortable with casting curses, but Discordian blessings are not my area of expertise. I suspect Q. G. Pennyworth is the resident expert on such matters. Anyway, I read the following article, and wondered what the Discordian position is on this important issue:

Russian Orthodox Church considers a ban on blessing weapons of mass destruction

'MOSCOW (RNS) — Early one evening in May 2018, days before the annual parade celebrating the Soviet victory in World War II, a convoy of military trucks carrying long-range nuclear weapons trundled to a halt on the Russian capital's ring road.

As police officers stood guard, two Russian Orthodox priests wearing cassocks and holding Bibles climbed out of a vehicle and began sprinkling holy water on the stationary Topol and Yars intercontinental ballistic missiles.

Since relations between Russia and the West plummeted after the Kremlin's seizure of Crimea in 2014, such scenes have become common here. Priests have sanctified S-400 surface-to-air missiles, nuclear submarines, tanks and fighter jets. Several years ago, a priest in Russia's far east explained that weapons, including nuclear missiles, were "perceived as a means of protection and salvation."

But the practice could soon be a thing of the past. Last month, a Russian Orthodox Church committee on ecclesiastical law recommended that clergy concentrate on blessing soldiers, rather than weapons.

"One can talk about the blessing of a warrior on military duty in defense of the fatherland," said Savva Tutunov, a bishop of the Moscow Patriarchate. "At the end of the corresponding ritual, the personal weapon is also blessed — precisely because it is connected to the individual person who is receiving the blessing. By the same reasoning, weapons of mass destruction should not be sanctified."

Not everyone agrees with the committee's proposal, which still has to be approved by Patriarch Kirill, the head of the Russian Orthodox Church.'

Here's the link: https://religionnews.com/2019/07/09/russian-orthodox-church-considers-a-ban-on-blessing-weapons-of-mass-destruction/

An inquiring mind wants to know.

[What To Do in the Event of an Alien Call?]

What To Do in the Event of an Alien Call?

As per the article:

"In the age of fake news, researchers worry conspiracy theories would abound before we could figure out how — or if — to reply to an alien message.

The answer to this question could affect all of our lives more than nearly any other policy decision out there: How, if it all, should humanity respond if we get a message from an alien civilization?

And yet politicians and scientists have never bothered to get our input on it.

At long last, that's changing. A group of researchers in the UK this week released the first major survey on the question. The responses could help inform an international protocol for responding to first contact."

Here's the link: https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/2019/7/6/20680228/aliens-survey-seti-meti-scientists-extraterrestrial-message

I'm all for hiding behind the curtains, not answering the door, and waiting for them to go away.

Please Note:

Alien contact was discussed, earlier this year, in "The aliens haven't contacted us because" thread, as per this link: https://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php/topic,38575.0.html. I started a new thread because now we're getting Officially Sciencey about it.

[How much longer till we all die off? 760 years, give or take.]

How much longer till we all die off? 760 years, give or take.

As per the article:

'The most mind-boggling controversy in the contemporary philosophy of science is the "doomsday argument," a claim that a mathematical formula can predict how long the human race will survive. It gives us even odds that our species will meet its end within the next 760 years.

The doomsday argument doesn't tell what's going to kill us — it just gives the date (very, very approximately).

When I first came across this idea, I thought it was absurd. A prediction must be founded on data, not math! That is by no means an uncommon reaction. One critic, physicist Eric J. Lerner, branded doomsday "pseudo-science, a mere manipulation of numbers."'

Here's the link: https://www.vox.com/the-highlight/2019/6/28/18760585/doomsday-argument-calculation-prediction-j-richard-gott

Gott, the creator of the prediction technique, calls it  "the Copernican method." 

That's a damn good name to build a marketing campaign around, and I would normally dismiss something like this out of hand, except for the lulz possibilities. But, Gott did get his prediction technique published in the prestigious journal Nature.

[The legend of Pascagoula's alien abduction now has a permanent spot in the city]

The legend of Pascagoula's alien abduction now has a permanent spot in the city

As per the article:

"More than 45 years ago, two Mississippi Coast men, Calvin Parker and Charles Hickson, claimed they were abducted and examined by aliens in a UFO and returned to the banks of the Pascagoula River that same night.

The story reached the press the next day, in October 1973, and soon brought national attention to Pascagoula.

The city now has a permanent reminder of the extraterrestrial tale after officials on Saturday dedicated a historical marker next to the Lighthouse Park boat launches. The plaque describes the account and notes it is one of the best-documented cases of an alien abduction, with two witnesses."

Here's the link: https://www.sunherald.com/news/local/counties/jackson-county/article231901653.html

I realize Mississippi has been a dull place since the Civil War ended, but still ...

[Marine Corps aviators grounded amid investigation into phallic flight pattern]

Marine Corps aviators grounded amid investigation into phallic flight pattern

As per the article:

'Two Marine Corps aviators have been grounded while they're being investigated "for flying a pattern resembling an obscene image" over Southern California, according to a military spokesman.

The 3rd Marine Aircraft Wing said last month that a "T-34C aircraft assigned to Marine Fighter Attack Training Squadron 101, 3rd Marine Aircraft Wing, flew an irregular flight pattern over the Salton Sea that resembled a phallic image."'

Here's a link: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/marine-corps-aviators-grounded-phallic-flight-pattern/

The article, however, provides no hard evidence of the alleged deed.

[A Gurgling Mud Pool Is Creeping Across Southern California Like a Geologic Poltergeist]

A Gurgling Mud Pool Is Creeping Across Southern California Like a Geologic Poltergeist

As per the article:

"A mysterious, bubbling mud geyser is on the move in Southern California, flitting dangerously close to railroad tracks, Highway 111 and some very expensive optic cables, like a geologic poltergeist, according to news sources.

Even stranger, this puzzling geyser — dubbed the "Slow One" — is in the same neighborhood as the source of the so-called "Big One," the giant earthquake that is expected to shake things up where the North American and Pacific tectonic plates rub together to form the San Andreas Fault."

Here's the link: https://www.livescience.com/63998-mud-pool-creeping-across-california.html

Here's another link with better photos: https://weather.com/news/news/2018-11-01-california-mud-geyser-moving


I predict someone will make a disaster movie based upon this phenomena in the near future. But, of course, they'll jazz it up a bit. Perhaps they'll add sharks, or something with tentacles.