Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Literate Chaotic => Topic started by: Penumbral on May 12, 2004, 10:38:31 AM

Title: Chaotic writings
Post by: Penumbral on May 12, 2004, 10:38:31 AM
After fighting hoards of dangerous deadly pack rats I always reach for and Ice cold funnel. You may ask why, but I will never tell. It?s a family secret. Witch reminds me I have an important message that will be forgotten in the morning if you get this in the morning ask yourself is it morning everywhere? So please gather around one and all to hear my most important message. Here it is: Never has a threesome with rubber bands. The condom brakes and all that is left is enjoyment and herpes take my advice I didn?t use it anyway.
Now let me tell you a story about my favorite lipstick a blind gnome and army of darkness.
It all started when I was eleven I was a major tweaker doing meth almost every other hour needless to say I never slept and what I did every night from 1am to 11 am was watch army of darkness. This made me very deranged and insane. HELLO. After many years of this my eyes gave me new movies. One never seen before ones only a badger could love. I remember having a colon cancer because of a mold residue in the chocolate bubble gum I had become addicted to swallowing. This is where the lipstick comes in. I was not always a man. No wait I have been but I was not always ?A? sexual before I had many encounters with women the most memorable of with was with a girl names bucktooth anny. She ate lipstick and it tasted good. All that said I would like to reincarnate the fact that life is only to be desired by man. Army of darkness was 7 hours long soon and I didn?t need a TV to watch it would play every day all day. It was fun because I could watch it and marry people at the same time. Witch reminds me of a funny anecdote I was once a nun working for a priest and he was marrying A rich blind gnome as well as a short 14 year old transvestite hermaphrodite with 2 fucking nostrils. This was an extra special marriage because it was both of  theirs first time to not have skewed each others brains out before the marriage. The hamburgers came from the floor. They where goddamn everywhere. I had no catsup. Today was sad.
Title: Chaotic writings
Post by: Trollax on May 13, 2004, 04:27:45 AM
If I put your lapdoog in muy car's fuel tank and it increased my netwqork speed would there still be bagels when I got home? If the warehose stores my underpants why are the seventeen of them? I walked out into the aqueduct one night and there was a man walking his umbrealla in the moonlight. The goddess did not want me to be happy. I left her side and found my own marbles,  my lover did not play games with them. She kept them close to her heart, they kept her safe when she had her slingshot to stop wars. I loved her like the daughter she was. But seeing as how she had a new body it wasn't incest. The walls fell of my car and I could drive anywhere. So I always had a parking space so long as ther was a ceiling available. I love milkshakes.
Title: Chaotic writings
Post by: Penumbral on May 21, 2004, 09:07:17 PM
Allover I walked tell me feet did say toodless now in there fondness I walk alone. Waiting for thi to end before it starts. Willys got my homiphobic neck. Then I walked down a ravine with out feet this was hard. Found some trailor trash eating just that asked him for food and I got a feast. Then I left there eat a whole bunny jumped a can of mountan dew and ran like  ahampster without feet.
Title: Chaotic writings
Post by: Zero on May 25, 2004, 06:25:23 AM
;0!
Title: Chaotic writings
Post by: Guido Finucci on May 25, 2004, 06:29:11 AM
For a first post, that sucks flinty goat nadgers.