Messages

How about using the crazy barber's psychotic outburst from episode 9 of "Monty python" as a mantra:

"Razor Razor Razor! Cut! Blood! Spurt! Artery! Murder! Hitchcock! Psycho! (Damn!)"

None of this sissy, 'jewel in the lotus' bullshit

or you could add nutmeg (because I've heard...from my botany professor...that if you consume enough of it, it can have mild hallucinogenic effects )...whatever suits you, really.....

According to my friend the effects aren't really mild (she was tripping for 3 days), but the amount you'd put in the drink wouldn't be enough to cause hallucinogenic effects.

Hmmm...I guess I misworded my earlier post a bit; I had meant to say that it was a mild  hallucinogen in the sense that, (as you touched upon in your response) it takes a lot more of it to produce a distinct hallucinogenic effect than it would to produce a similar hallucinogenic trip with psychadelic mushrooms or mescal buttons (my professor said that it generally takes about a full pound of it)

Yes, white rum.

[1.)]

This one is relatively serious inso much as, vis-a-vis, you can actually make it without being arrested or institutionalized....Its basically an "Arnold Palmer" cocktail (Iced Tea + Lemonade) that I've modified to venerate the Bleeding-Head-of-Arnold-Palmer idol worshipped at Doktors-4-"BOB" performances...

Ingredients/Directions:
Put the following things together in a glass, stirring throughout ...
1.) Fill a glass 2/5ths of the way up with Iced Tea
2.) Add Lemonade until the glass is 4/5ths full
3.) Add somewhere between a teaspoonful to a full shot of fruit infused rum
4.) Add A few splashes of grenadine syrup until the mixture turns blood red
5.) Add other miscellaneous garnishes until the glass is the full 5/5ths full. I reccommend powdered ginger and a lime wedge, and maybe some orange juice or more rum, or you could add nutmeg (because I've heard...from my botany professor...that if you consume enough of it, it can have mild hallucinogenic effects )...whatever suits you, really.....

[From the Desks of Diogenes Syadasti Maharishi Shandor, O.M. and Bohandas Mohandas Banannafannafofondis:]

From the Desks of Diogenes Syadasti Maharishi Shandor, O.M.
and Bohandas Mohandas Banannafannafofondis:

[/u]

The Following are some SubGenius and Discordian mantras, which I have either gathered from various sources (Including five which I've made up myself- The FSM Mantra, the 2 Holy-Grail Mantras, the Discordian-Mantras mantra, and the Obscene Votive Candle mantra). To fully understand the meanings of some of these mantras, it is reccommended that you be familiar with, among other things, The Principia Discordia (Obviously), the Muscial Stylings of DEVO, the musical stylings of The Doktors for "BOB", the films Arise, Let's Visit the World of the Future and Monty Python and the Holy Grail, the TV shows Pinky and the Brain and Dr.Who, the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, the SubGenius BOB-Songs CDs, and a smattering of French-Canadian profanity^* (At least two are based on obscene, religion related, French/Québecois double-entendres). None of these, however, are strictly required. And now, without further ado, the Mantras:


The Bleeding Head Mantra:
"Bleeding Head Good! Healed Head Bad!"


The Arnold Palmer/Head Launching Mantra (may be combined w/ the above):
"Launch the Head; Launch the Head!"


The Universal DEVO-"BOB" Mantra:
"I am "BOB", I am Not "BOB", You are "BOB", We are all "BOB", We are All Devo., We are "BOB""


The Holy Grail Mantra:
"Aauuuuugh" (From the back of the throat)
(hmmm....He must've died while typing it.....)


The Holy Grail Mantra (Expanded):
"Aauuuuugh...San-Gréal Câlise; de la Sacrament de la Sacrifice à Calvaire de la Crisse; à la Tabernac à...Aauuuuugh"
(see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quebec_French_profanity)


The J.R. "BOB" Dobbs Mantra:
"You Are J.R. "BOB" Dobbs; You Are Not J.R. "BOB" Dobbs; You Have Always Been  J.R. "BOB" Dobbs"

The Sri Syadasti Mantra:
"Sri SYADASTI SYADAVAKTAVYA SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADASTI CAVAKTAVYASCA SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADAVATAVYASCA SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADAVAKTAVYASCA"

The Root Chakra Mantra:
"Lam"

The Litany of Deevolution (The Jocko-Homo Mantra):
"Are we not men?; We are Devo.; Are We Not Men?; We Are Devo.; Are We Not Pins?; We Are Devo.; Are we Not Men?; We Are Devo.;  We Must Repeat; D-E-V-O; We Must Repeat D-E-V-O; We Must Repeat; D-E-V-O; We Must Repeat D-E-V-O."

The Québecois Obscene Votive Candle Mantra:
"Ciarge de la Sacré Ciboire de la Tabernac de la Ostie et Câlise de la Sacrament de la Sacrifice à Calvaire; de la Sang Réal de la Crisse-Dieu fils ****-Un par Baptême et le Plus Crissant le fils de la Viarge " (Should be said with a Freach-Canadian Accent)

(see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quebec_French_profanity)

The Doktors 4 "BOB" Mantra:
"Heunh..."

The Skaro Mantra:
"Exterminate! Annihilate! Destroy!"

The Mr.Show Mantra:
"The BOB is not a person; The BOB is Pure-Light-And-Energy; He Will Lead Us Out Through Heaven's-Chimney in a Giant, Cigar-Shaped UFO™-Brand Flying-Saucer"

(See BOBsongs 6 track #6)

The B-Movie Mantra:
"It is Film! It is Giant People! Yes, yes you are Watching! No, no you Will Not Forget What You See"


The SubGenius Mantras Mantra:
"Ommmmmm....SubGenius Mantras for Use By Discordians or Members of the Church of the SubGenius...Huenh......"


The Bavarian Illuminati Mantra:
"Fnord ..."

The mad lab-rat Mantra:
"Narf..."(/ "Zort") (/ "Troz") (/ "Poit")
(May be combined with the Bavarian Illuminati Mantra, the Holy Grail Mantra, the Root Chakra Mantra, the Flying Spaghetti Monster Mantra (see below) and/or the Doktors-4-"BOB" Mantra)

The Flying Spaghetti Monster Mantra:
"Arrr..." (end cycle of chants with the chant "...r-amen...")

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So what do you think?

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If anybody has any other ideas for Discordian or SubGenius mantras, you can post them here, by the way.

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^*see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quebec_French_profanity

[Cosmic Überbitch]

I find myself disagreeing strongly with the premise of the argument, specifically the line "The strife and discord of Eris are more the tool of the freedom fighter than of the oppressor."  This seems the very definition of hubris. 

Discord does not appear to be a tool, it appears to be an inevitability.  The mythopoetic metaphor ("strife and discord of Eris") used by Prelate Diogenes Shandor seems to acknowledge this, while the author apparently does not recognize the importance of his own words.

Who is Eris?  I don't find it particularly useful to imagine Eris as an actual goddess, but for the moment let's go with that.  She is a goddess, a being that is to man as man is to an ant, of discord and strife. These are the essential elements that compose her being.  So what the esteemable Prelate appears to present to us is the idea that "freedom fighters" (chuckles) can use the essential elements of a Goddess as tools.  And not just any Goddess, but one known as something of a Cosmic Überbitch.

This seems a sure recipe for ending up the goo scraped from the bottom of planet sized Grecian sandals.  Serious wrath of god stuff.  Hell, I see a movie in this.

I think that I should clarify that I did not intend to mean that Eris makes everything all sweetness and light; Far from it, the gist of my document was that the power of Eris simply transforms the world from the metaphorical "Boot stomping upon a human face forever", into "Two humans punching each other in the face forever" instead (Something which I consider a much more fair and equitable position, even though people are still being struck in the face)

[Roleplaying Games:]

I Have Some Proposed Additions to this List:

Roleplaying Games:

Paranoia/Paranoia XP The setting of this RPG goes heavily into the idea of destructive order, and destructive chaos (and constructive chaos) The setting of this game is a futuristic dystopia ("Alpha Complex") run by a deranged automated sentient computer system that serves as its absolute ruler (evil order), the computer grows continually more and more insane over time due to the technicians in charge of its upkeep programming it with contradictory (and self-serving) orders (Evil Chaos), and the only thing keeping the Alpha Complex from completely destroying itself is a combination of poor orgaiization that keeps the Computer's order's from being carried out effectively (generic (good and evil) chaos), and a number of secret societies (Including the Illuminati  ) plotting to overthrow the computer and install themselves as the new rulers (Generic (Good and Evil) Order)

Toon In the "Crawl of Catchooloo" campaign setting, the "Elderly Gods" and "Pretty Good Old Ones" gradually drive the (naturally insane cartoon) characters sane by their mere presence (Evil Order)

Dungeons and Dragons This one is perhaps the most significant for these purposes. The game's "Alignment" system divides every character's moral and behavioral ideology into two entirely independent dimensions of Law(Order)-Vs-Chaos and Good-Vs-Evil, in a manner similar (nearly identical, actually) to the dimensions of Order-Vs-Chaos and Creation-Vs-Destruction presented on Page 63 of the Principia Discordia ("The Curse of Greyface and the Introduction of Negativism"), except that the D&D version also allows for/actually shows neutrality between Order and chaos and between good and evil.

Movies (Warning: Spoilers)

SkulHedFace, an hour long film by the heavy-metal rock band GWAR, deals with an evil space-alien (acting, for this thread's purposes, as an agent of evil order) stealing/harvesting the individuality the individuality of the members of rock-and-roll bands, in the form of a substance called "Jizmoglobin"

Renzezvous with RagNaRok, also by GWAR, involves a "Holy Robot From Outer Space" named "Cardinal Syn" coming to enslave the Earth (Evil Order)

I liked it, it sounds like you won't have much need of the 50 post rule.

50 Post rule?

All I know in regard to the world potentially ending in 2012 is that I sure as Hell intend to be at 15X-Day in Brushwood....

Just out of curiousity, are you going to be doing insights about Machiavelli's Discourses on Titus Livy too?

This is beautiful, Prelate.  Succinct and well thought out.

I would quibble with a few points, perhaps, but overall nicely done and a very refreshing change from so many of the first posts we get around here.

Thanks.

[Salve Discordia:]

(A quick word before i start: I'm new to this forum and not sure if this bit of philosophical speculation is being posted in the right place, but it seems to be the right place. If it isn't, then tell me. oh, and Hi )

From the Desk of Prelate Diogenes Gilgamesh Zarathustra Shandor, A.R.S.E.
(Please note that the final portion⁽¹⁾ of this rant/diatribe is written in a slightly different style, as it was originally part of a paper that (which?) I wrote for a college course)


Salve Discordia:

One thing which I have noticed about many Discordians is that many of them seem to believe that everyone can get along without arguing, forgetting that Eris is, first and foremost, the goddess of discord; A more important problem however, and one which is perpetrated by Discordians and Non-Discordians alike (particularly in the Church of the Sub-Genius) is a misinterpretation of the meaning of this discord:

   The Discord of Eris is not the bloody warfare of Ares or the wholesale destruction of J.R."BOB" Dobbs (may all acquittals be upon his name), but rather merely the small-scale petty bickering and domestic unrest seen amongst the guests of "The Jerry Springer Show" and those people picked up by the police on "Cops" and of mudslinging politicians during an election year.

   Nor is the truest and holiest Strife of Eris Discordia manifest in acts of one-sided oppression either, but is only present in the skirmishes and uprisings and general popular unrest that arise as a reaction thereto. \The strife and discord of Eris are more the tool of the freedom fighter than of the oppressor. Generally there have to be two real sides both fighting in order for there to be actual discord between them; when only one side is fighting and the other isn't fighting back, that isn't discord, its more in the realm of being stepped on.

   Her Strife and Discord are present, to some degree, in the endless forms and infuriating decision making processes of bureaucracies, but only in their most bastardized form, as bureaucracies are often put in place in order to prevent conflicts, or at least those conflicts that could harm or pose a threat to their parent governments or companies, replacing them with stodgy, bastardized pseudo-conflicts that play out only on paper under the direction of uncaring paper pushers . Bureaucracies, and other infuriating things, instead lend more to the Discord of Eris more so in the expressions of outrage which they create than they do by the outrage itself their internal decision making.

   The discord of Eris is also manifest in the system of checks and balances of our political system⁽²⁾; Even though the majority of both the Democrats and the Republicans are either promoting some corrupt personal or partisan agenda and/or (else), failing that, are incompetent, when you get both parties together in congress in approximately even numbers, the corruptions on both sides more-or-less cancel each other out. If there was only one political party, then all of that party's agendas and machinations, even those of the most corrupt nature, would quickly come to fruition and we'd swiftly be plunged into a nightmarish dystopia. If both of the parties, instead, acted truly bi-partisanly, then it would either be functionally the same as having only one political party, or else we would get stuck with compromised (and/or bastardized) laws that please nobody .

   Oh, and also evolution; Strife and Discord power evolution as well; The Natural Selection part of evolution anyway...

Since it is perhaps naïve to believe that we can ever all get along truly equitably, here are just a few examples of situations where, by replacing methods of conflict resolution that rely on warfare or dehumanizing stodginess, the Discord of Eris could enrich all of our lives, if only society would let it:

1.) Bureaucracies: these are generally put in place to ensure that resources are allocated in the most efficient way possible, but are themselves wildly inefficient. I think that we can all agree that it would less time consuming and aggravating for all involved if we settled questions of resource allocation through bare-knuckle brawls instead. This system would also represent a savings in terms of space for corporations and governmental departments based in a small number of large buildings, as a boxing ring, pit-of-death, and/or Thunderdome in each building would take up less space than that already used up by bureaucratic record-keeping facilities and the offices of existing bureaucrats

2.) Peace and War: If everyone could learn to be so uncooperative that order could no longer be maintained within the ranks of armies than there would be no more wars.
                                       Imagine, if you will, two world powers poised on the brink of nuclear war, as they were back in the dark days of the cold war. Their leaders give the order to fire, but the soldiers refuse; They feel that if they're going to be firing off nuclear missiles all of a sudden then they deserve a raise in pay. Their commanding officer browbeats them for insubordination and while he's doing so, another soldier with a preexisting grudge shoots him; The entire missile silo instantly erupts into a multi-sided firefight between the soldiers. Within minutes nobody is left to fire the missiles. Similar disputes break out in all of the missile silos on both sides of the conflict and because of this a nuclear holocaust is narrowly averted and Peace is thus restored to the world.

3.) Peaceful Conflict Resolution: I believe that the most sensible way for the leaders of the world's various nations to settle conflicts without going to war is to attack each other directly, or, failing that, to attack each other's families. This would be preferable both in terms of loss of life and effects on the national economy.
          To give just one specific example (of many possible) of just the economic benefits of this plan, current estimations show that the United States of America could have saved up to possibly as much as 4.5 trillion dollars (and almost countless lives) to date by bribing one of Saddam Hussein's bodyguards to murder him in his sleep⁽³⁾ instead of going to war in Iraq.

I am not a crackpot, (or, at least, if I am, then that doesn't necessarily mean that I'm wrong)!
      -Diogenes Shandor      
      -Bohandas Banannafannafofondas       [11:04 05 09 13AM]


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1 yes, really, the final, "rant' portion, not the beginning.


2 (I live in the USA, but this is true to a greater or lesser extent of any democracy with at least two or more political parties)


3 Note that the included estimations of savings have already factored in an expenditure of up to 500 Billion Dollars in bribes and other expenses to carry out said hypothetical assassination.