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the posting of the revolution videos to youtube made their relevant content ratio go up 5000000 times

http://tech.slashdot.org/story/11/02/03/1910245/Death-By-GPS-Increasing-In-Americas-Wilderness

An anonymous reader writes

"Every year, more and more Americans are dying in deserts and wildernesses because they rely on their GPS units (and, to some degree, their cellphones) to always be accurate. The Sacramento Bee quotes Death Valley wilderness coordinator Charlie Callagan: 'It's what I'm beginning to call death by GPS ... People are renting vehicles with GPS and they have no idea how it works and they are willing to trust the GPS to lead them into the middle of nowhere.'"

Huh.  Maybe we've been giving the robots too little credit by expecting an armed uprising.

No, we give them too little credit. They are reducing the human population by a few people per year by getting them lost in the desert. One day you will want to drive from NYC to Boston and you'll see a detour through the mojave desert, and then you will know fear 

Shameful. I heard that in Salazore, any public official gets booted if their blood alcohol level drops below a certain level. Or at least that was how Generalissimo Enrico Salazar kept his underlings under "control," if that's the right word.

if you did this, except for everyone in the country, you would have brave new world

Apparently Oliver Sacks, who write books on his more interesting clinical psychology cases, has prosopagnosia.

The daughter of Gordon Freeman and Ariel, couldn't stand the sea once she found out that Sebastian existed.

I know what you are thinking: We already have a few bibles out there for Discordians. Unless I missed something (distinct possibility) then this is a new idea.

You know how the principia is kind of a collection of crazy shit, and the et cetera is kind of a collection of ... more crazy shit? You know about the Christian bible, how it is a bunch of stories about God or pertaining to God? Why don't we have one of those. A book of stories about Eris and her followers arranged chronologically. Stories like the emperor penguin one, except less crazy and more divine lovey. Stories about Eris in the ancient times and the now times, like a backstory to her supposed death in a bar fight in Medina County, OH.

And for all of you who say "Discordianism shouldn't be this serious!", you are absolutely right. But I think that it would be a pretty cool book to have anyway.

Oh, and this is a GASM because I have nowhere near the literary ability to write this by myself.

   In front of a gate, at the end of a dark road, is where Jessica Walker stands. The sign on the concrete post holding up the iron gate says “Waste Management”. The iron of the gate is a facade, barely thick enough to conceal the titanium bars beneath. On the post, underneath the sign, is a small disc of glass, through which she is being watched. Retinal and facial identification algorithms are pounding away at her features in the vast complex behind the gate. The gate starts to slowly open and Jessica picks up her leather briefcase and walks in.
   The ground is covered with an inch-thick dusting of snow that crunches underneath her feet, and the sky is an overcast and snowy white. The thick falling snow lands in her brown hair masterfully pulled up in a ponytail behind her head. The business suit and briefcase say business, but her certification into this program mean that she is anything but. What Jessica doesn't know is that her lack of seriousness will save her sanity when she sees what is inside of the large, looming building veiled by the falling snow.
   The long path walked, she stands in front of the steel double doors at the entrance to the building. They slowly open, powered by huge motors, revealing that they are three inches thick and have hinges like a blast shelter. The lobby is warm and clean, bathed in a yellow light from a chandelier reflected off the hardwood floor.
   She walks up to the receptionist and begins to speak when an old man enters from a door on the left side of the room. “Ah, Jessica Walker, it's so nice to meet you.” He advances eagerly on a cane, his white hair flying about like a madman. He enthusiastically takes her hand and pumps it up and down. “I'm Gaius Kohlman, you didn't have any trouble getting here did you?” Recognition lights up in Jessica's eyes. “Dr. Kohlman, it's nice to meet you too. I wasn't expecting a waste management facility, but the camera was easy enough to recognize so I knew I was in the right place.” “Ahh yes, they still use the cameras over at home base do they? I almost never leave here, so I haven't seen the camera in the front for ages. We can't use cameras lower than the first floor here, not since business picked up.”
   Jessica looks puzzled, wondering why camera use wouldn't be possible in an FBI facility. Gaius recognizes this and quickly says, “I suppose I have a lot to explain to you, why don't we go downstairs and we can start your introductions.” He turns back to the left side of the hall and Jessica recognizes that the door he came out of leads to a silver elevator.

   Hurtling down 48 floors in just under a minute leaves Jessica feeling slightly queasy. When the doors open, she is greeted with the sight of 10 men lining a hallway, all with automatic rifles standing at attention. As they walk through the hallway, Dr. Kohlman addresses each man by name in a cordial manner, to which they respond with a curt “Sir.” At the end of the hallway there is a tall set of doors 10 feet wide by 20 high. They are barely distinguishable from the concrete around them and Jessica suspects that they are also reinforced like the ones in the front of the building. Dr. Kohlman reaches into his jacket pocket and takes out a black disc in a wire frame folded flat, and a conductive ink pen. He flips the black disc into a horizontal position within the frame, and it looks like a gyroscope. In the act of flipping the disc, the light of the ceiling quickly reflects off of the surface, showing an intricate network of printed metal wires almost like a PCB with two fat silver circles for completing the circuit on the top of the disc. “You see,” Dr. Kohlman addresses Jessica, “the doors are specifically designed to stay shut unless a stabilizing field is introduced near them. This keeps those little fuckers from getting out.” Jessica asks “What...little fuckers?” Gaius uncaps the conductive pen and closes the circuit on the black disc. The disc immediately starts spinning at a high velocity and the printed circuits on the surface glow red hot. The doors crack open and slowly begin to swing back. “These little fuckers” Gaius says as the doors open all the way and Jessica is greeted to the sight of an immense warehouse full of black spheres, the air crackling with the sound of a thousand madly spinning gyroscopes barely keeping their evil back.

Allright, I've had this idea for a story for a long time, and since I suck at writing stories for long periods of continuous time, I thought that I might write this one on a post by post basis. The story will get into the plot slowly, but what you need to know (if you haven't read a lot of Lovecraft) is that in Antartica there is a city called Unknown Kadath where there is a room at the top of an onyx tower. In this room sit the gods of men, their size shrinking or increasing based on the numbers of believers they have, but they have no power, as they are under the control of Nyarlathotep, the crawling chaos. This Lovecraftian plot will be combined with (as you guessed it) Discordian stuff, but I'm planning it to be a horror book, although it will probably be more science fiction.

In any event, I'll start writing today and hopefully it gets moderately long before I lose interest (which i probably will eventually, which is why I don't end up finishing a lot of my stories). But if you like the story, tell me, because praise will probably make me more motivated to actually attempt to finish the story (maybe).

I love this gilt =/= guilt thing, genius.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you just praise your own ingenuity?

I am assuming he's being wryly sarcastic because it's so obvious. But it still made it less funny.

I'm actually praising the ingenuity of whoever came up with that (I think I read it in either the apocrypha or the principia). So yeah, not sarcastic.

The story behind that one is funny. One night as I was going asleep the phrase popped through my head and i sprang out of bed to type it down in my phone. If it isn't obvious (i often am not obvious) this is a pun on the story of eve giving adam the apple. I love this gilt =/= guilt thing, genius.

I made some more, if you couldn't tell.

Here's another, inspired by "keep calm and carry on". Gender and sexuality neutral (hopefully), but also less 'jarring'.

How about we make jarring posters advertising discordia? Posters that people will look at and be   . These are fundamentally different than posters like "23 things while you wait" as those are mindfuck posters and while they have the potential to shock people, these new posters will be more for the sole purpose of advertising discordia in a shocking fashion.

I opted to go for a "positive aspects of being a discordian" angle when making this poster.


Remember: Aphrodite may be the greek goddess of beauty, but Eris is the greek goddess of fucking sexy!

btw, i don't know if anyone has told anyone here, but this is my favorite psychology thing from class.



Not Brad Pitt doing a photoshoot for inglorious basterds, in fact it is Hermann Rorschach, the creator of the Rorschach test. Imagine my surprise opening my tests and measures book to see what I thought was Pitt staring me back in the face. (Rorschach must have gotten so much psychology grad student ass).

http://www.wimp.com/conformityvideo/

The most important point is at 7:20. You can't let yourself be conformed to the group that you have assigned yourself to (and don't say that you aren't in a group). Be extra critical of dems if you are a dem, libs if you are a lib, and tea partiers if you are a tea partier or a british soldier.

At around 6:05, information relevant to Mindfucks and GASMs. If one voice saying an opinion three times is as valid to people as three different people saying the same opinion (reading the article now and validating that this is what it really implies) then a single agent of Eris has the potential to mindfuck an entire group if changing the group opinion is involved in the mindfuck.

Fodder for your mind, and your bantha.