Topics

starts with eye of the world.

read it. :!:

once about a year ago, i was chillin at my box, talkin to some bros over the irc, r0x0ring some b0x0rz as usuall, when a bud gave me a link to a page(it really was just a page) of a comic with a character named dogweilder, who weilded dogs to peoples' faces. upon further contemplation, i realized that it was foolishness. however, if it is foolishness, then why do i giggle maniacally while threatening to wield dogs to my co-workers' faces?

ponder while reciting the words to "bad moon rising" ten thousand times.

yes they seriously are. this is no easy joke at the expense of homeosexuals. if that were the case i could find much better material, but yes, gay people really are funny. my boss is gay, and he's always acting gay, which makes everyone laugh(it's quite obvious that's the idea). so if you were watchign will and grace for the modern drama(when are they gonna get married anyway? geez), you can let our little pc mind at ease, for gay people are naturally funny after all. despite pr people trying to convince us to the contrary, gay people are not only funny, they also have a sense of humour. and if you don't think so, you might be a gay fudgepackin fag.

so after votign on moday for the conservative party of canada, on the basis that the protential for lack of corruption outweighs any ideological rehtoric pondered by the fomrer regime( is ay former because as it will soon be revleaed anyway, they became a minority gov't, and less able to be a de-facto dictatorship). of course when i got the ballot, iwas tempted to let ideology out weigh my sense of political morality, and vote communist. despite the rather obvious fact that my vote wouldn't have mattered either way(i'm deep in conservative country, since all otehr political parties have no less than ignored this province, and no more than promised to take teh excess tax revenues from teh least taxed, province in teh country to the the highest taxed, poorest provinces in teh countries), i still voted for the local conservative candiate, deepak obrai. yes my freinds, deepak is in teh house and enjoying his salary, which makes me feel dirty. well voting makes me feel dirty. see i'm a fascist,and us fascist don't believe in voting. we believe political discoruse is best argued with fire arms and secret police, not electiosn made to look somehow fair to the casual observer who has had less than 2 weeks of political education in his or her life(ie the average canadian). which all leads to the entire point of this article. i've decided to take a step up since el fantab lo! has been going under the name of logan runjack for soemtime now(between 5 and 23 people may find this ironic somehow, but it's dountful any one of that numebr will ever read this). since he has obviously abandoned hsi namesake and the whole of creation for long legs and cheap beer, i will steal the names ake and the whole of creation both, elevating myself in one fell swoop to proprietor of the whoel of creation. now i'm not a jealous god by any means, but if you may feel free to bow and scrape if it pleases you to do so. if want to grovel at me for a longer life span, world peace, or whatever else, then don't bother. i like the world the way it is, and the mrotality of mortals makes me feel like a big god, not the demi godhood of my former position. now before i take office there are now postions open for attourney to the propriter, management, secratary to the propritor and back rubber to the proprietor. also in announcement, or more and affirmant of a previous memo, i am infallable, and belief to the contrary will result in immidiate smitage. more postions may become available later. thank you.

-EF!

space trade and battle. it's agenre of game that's gone largely unnoticed despiute having a longevity of over ten years. of course ten years ago the graphics sucked and space was bland. btu no more. freelancer is a digital anvil/microsfot published game. you'll spend most of your time in your space ship, shipping commodity goods for the best rpices between systems or selling your balsters to the highest bidder. unliek most flight/space games, this one uses an innovative mouse flight system, one i feel would be pretty damn good for a real space ship, tho it doesn't quote feel the same as a j-stick. the singel player is stroy driven adn takes you acress abotu 5 dozen systems(i think it has about 50-60 systems altogether), and is told by in game sequences, planet side animations(which would be not unliek a 3rd person halflife movie so to say), and excelent voice acting, including a surprise appearance by a famous sci fi actor(which is quite well done, despit emany terrible celebrity game voice acting in recent years). although there are 4 classes of ships and 5-8 ships in class, though out the game i wanted there to be more ships to give me a reason to keep runnign around looking for stuff, if not for mroe powerful ships, then ones with different looks. mp seem sliek it could be fun, btu can also seem quite lifeless as 32 other palyers are scattered across teh game world(tho quite perilous if your run into player-pirates)

the environments are breathtaking, often nebulae and dust clouds are visible from far away but seem to be apart of the background until you turn your ship and realize they're 3d or fly right into them.

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have to cut this oen short. look for more later.

it's a question, and lo, as i have breathed it and given it body and soul, so shall ye answer, as it is written, so shall it be!

or -

i watched star trek.


so there i was sitting and watchign star trek enterprise, when it struck me like a million photons that sped tward me from the magic moving picture box a short distance from me. "new world economy, an economy w/o money, an economy where everyone wins, no one loses and there is incentive to do better. but how?"

and that's the question.

how can the world have a non exploitive economy that has no currency, or barring that, has no exploitative soemthing or others. explain in five hundred million words or less.

[clearly]

-or-
a sheep in wolf's clothing



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so i come back after an absence, and see muuch disturbtion of shit on these here forums. not necessarily a bad thing i reckon, as having your disturbed can be a good experience for anyone except thos ewith heart trouble or sever risk of stroke, aneruism or any number of other conditions. but in any case, from my half assed and utterely prejudicial, nto to mention obnoxiously biased point of view; there seem to be mroe or less two sides to the whole thing. on the one hand we have mr jones, adn on the other we have the rest of the board. mr. jones seems to be on a judgement trip, and authority trip if you will. i spose that his trip and he's entitled to it, tho he often burns himself with his own arguments.

i coudl quote him, but i'm far too lazy and time does nto permit me to, so i won't. sintead i will leave you with the spectre of reality to find your proofs, so long as we may ignore what defines a proof, and what, if anything, we are trying to prove. indeed, i lost myself trying to hink up a flashy name for this thread. irregardless. words have been exchanged, mr jones in one example said peopel have been leaving this board, and yet i see many of the same faces that were here before, and new ones to boot. indeed, peopel have come and left the board several times over since i myself joined, and while i myself may be at least partially, if not wholly responsible for soem of these leavings, i am sure the people who came and left or were here before and left, or who haven't left but came or haven't come yet or maybe haven't left yet do so at their own discretion, and it might just as much to do with the meaningless 3 word story thread as the always ignorable tao and evt smooching threads.

*ahem*

to the more theological sound points - i heard soemthign abotu hypocrites, and christians, which of course is no surprise, i think we can all agree that the bible is obviously hypocritical, i mean what kind of wrathfull god suddenly sends his only begotten son to the earth to be chained to tree stuck with some metal in order to forgive creation. i mean he 's god foir fuck's sake!(or was- but that beside the point). obviously doesn't make any sense at all, but i dare anyoen to tell me that they themselves are nto a hypocrit. anyone here an anarchist but work a full time job? who here call s themself a vegetarian but uses toothpaste lipstick or one of a million household products (including gasoline) that use animal parts? and what coudl be more hypocritical than a get together for a religion that clearly states "ye shall sticketh apart".

a wise ass once told me, "stop think with your penis and start thinking with your stomach, asshole" of course we were on the way to dinner and i had the rather bad manners to keep ogling hot chicks on the way.

tell me what i smroe absurd than the idea that someone else's heresy should be another man's dogma? that just becauxe it has homosexual leanings makes it sacred, or that anythign that isn't obviously somehow discordant in a positive manner, is suddnely too blasphemous, childish, and silly for a faith that embraces blasphemy, the laughter of children, and silliness?

the kali yuga is a game played not with wooden pieces for pawns, but with men, women and children for pieces, with guns and bullets and explosives things for manouvres, with pr and backroom deals for huzzah's. if once fails to see the absurdity in these and in all aspects of life, the silliness, the discord, the order, the chaos, the organization, the disorganization, the this, the that, the everything, than one does not get the joke.

of course i don't get the joke either, tho out of social soemthing or other i'm going to smile and laugh hysterically, because i'm drunk on ther ether of life, the universe and eris's contuning swift kicks to my solar plexis.

good day and good night, good sirs and madams, for i must return to my menial existence in teh wilds of the great hurtin lands of western canada. to my $7.25/hour jobs slanging dead cows to the extremely obese, sitting on the couch smoking drugs to pass the time while watchign star treek to see who will get told next. because really folks, it's not the message that matters, it's no the results, it's not even the fuckin future, it's the hours in between that count.


i forgot the rest, but i will leave you all with this

"give war a chance"

let's face it folks, with the exception of perfect dark, fps and cosoles just do not mix, and the epitome of that statement cna be summed up with one word: socom 2.

it's got all the elements of fps games you'd find on the pc; bombs, hostages, guns,. however all of this is missing one important element: aim.

that's right, aiming in socom is alot like aiming in counterstrike without using the mouse at all, and using instead the page up and down keys to look vertically. it's just that bad.

so to sum things up we at the institute for completely wasting your time give socom 2 the rather high rating of .01 stars.

/me shrugs

iw as wonderign if anyone had copied a fair amoutn of the original sermons, rants and whatnots in this area in an easier to print version?

if so it'd be greatly appreciated, and i could probaly even host it with a direct link to here(heck i could even do a crap html job for easy browsing)

i had a vision last ngiht andit went soemthing like:


rodney:do you think we oculd make workers out of crocadiles?
me: well if we geneticlaly altered htem to have opposable thumbs, and made them smart enough tohandle the tasks sure.
rodney:so it's all about the thumb huh?
me:yeah.
rodney: cool let's make us some crocadile slaves!
me: only oen problem is that liek the diabolically evil bag of chips(in the previous un-aired vision), onceit gains a bit of inteligence it'll want more freedom. voting rights,wages, tv priveleges. it would be pure mayhem. our politicians are already crooks, do we really want crocs in office as well?
rodney. who cares, as long as i don't have to do any work, seem ike a good idea to me.

after which the group showed the secret punch to the arm to show their apporval fo rsuch an initiaitve.

i could write an elongated, overly verbose article explaining this, but the whole article can be summed up in one word.

surrender.

er somewhere soemone said soemthign about a sacred chao after i said i draw better ones or somethin, and i said i'd post one if i found one laying abouty. well i found my book of squiggly lines which is my doodle book from when i was quite mad, and scanned the one that's in tehre. it's a few years old and i draw them much better now, btu they take a good few horu sto draw properly, and i tend to leave them in naughty palces. but in any case, this gives a jist as to what they may look like.

and lo the sage did stagger out ofthe pub, wearing nought but a brown three piece suit and exhorting wildly about the nature of colours.
"do ye know that all colours are the same?" he uestioned unto the night sky, "do ye know that the colour of omni is that which is all colours, and that all colours are omni? seek ye into the omnidirectional halo of the light bulb an dye shall see that verily the colour is many."
and the midnight did trumpet in reverse saying, "yet i prefer blue and black and the silver of my moon upon th econcrete and dew glistened leaves. to that what do ye sayeth then oh sage?
and lo the sage did harken back upon the midnight, cursing mildly and saying upon it, "and i prefer brown ye foolish abstract condiment of reality! for in thine mind's eye is the fancy of thine desire. did not the quaker say unto his wife, "all the world is queer save me and thee; and sometimes I wonder 'bout thee'?. yes my freind, i prefer brown.
lo and verily did the sage then take a spin and a nose dive passing out on the curb, robed only in a three piece brown suit.

shoudl probaly put a disclaimer on thsi one, this ais one fo those depressing, overly intimate and way bitchy posts. also reading on may destroy your preconceptions or illusions you may have of me, so if you'd liek to keeop- your illsusions intact, just turn around and walk the other way.

my life sucks. i don't mean in a cambodia/ethipia way, or a 'i spent 20 years in a chinese prison and all i got was this lousy t-shirt' type way. i jsut don't like it. it's going no where fast. everyone i know lives liek 3000 miles away, , my job sucks, and i hate it, i'm ugly, skinny and i can actually feel myself getting stupider. every girl i like is either taken or sexually unattractive, my life has come to the point wher eit revolves aorund a video game, going to th ebar and getting drunk, and work.  i no longer have th emotivation to do anythign, wether it be to better my financial postion, write music, or do anythign actually worthwhile. i live thousands of miles from home, but not only can i not afford to travel there, if i duid go back the rent is too high and i wouldn't be abel to find a job anyway(which is why i live here in the first place)...


well i was gonna write a bunch more but i lsot the motivation do so. fuck i feel pathetic today.

nt

in the beginning, there was but one, and he was I, later he modified this to I am, and further he modified this again to I am Man. he was a rather prodigcous fellow, beign th eonly sort of himself about. he slacked aroudn for quite a time, enjoying the scenery, throing stuff, sinking stuff, jumping around in riviers, lakes, and mud puddles, and further doign other stuff, which he could not later recall. overall tho, he had thought he had had a decent time of it. a littl ebit later after the doing of stuff, he found himself feelign a sensation he had never experienced before. not knwoing what it was, he decided that he should have soem help with his conundrum, and the onlything that could help him was one better, and so he created one like him but better. he called her woman, and thought it was very fitting, for he was man, and wo was what he had said when he had finished in his work. he called forth to her "woman, what is this sensation that i feel, i do notknowwhat it is" she looked about "are  you bored?"
'not really, don't think i can get enough of throwign stuff aroudn and sinking stuff"
"are you tired?"
"well i had a nap a little while ago, so i'm pretty good that way"
"are you horny?"
"what's that?"
after a time where woman instructed man in the ways of horneyness, he said
"nope, that's not what i am, but thanks, that was pretty cool"
"hmm, perhaps you are hungry then?"
"hungry?"
"you know eating, food?"
"that must be it! what shall i eat? are you hungry?"
'well i was going to wash my hair, but why not."
"do you know how to make food?"
"there are no dishes, and after that horny buiness, i'm not much up for fixing anythign to eat"
"hmm"
"have you had breakfast yet?"
"what's that?"
"only the most important meal of the day"
"really, i must know more"

and with that, the two set out in search of breakfast, searching far and wide; high and low, in a that primal quest for the most important meal of the day.

based on teh pd 5th ed., the illuminatus! trilogy, and the guy in the black coat with no face.

there are five distinct aspects to teh discordian movment, and ehre in a ratehr unthought out post, is they:

POEE
the youngest branch of discordianism, this group's method includes hilarious jokes, jakes, and mindfucks. the party people of discordia, they gnerate postive discordiant vibes by having a good time and getting jiggy with it, all teh while playing games of sink and reciting dirty limericks.
symbol:the five fingered hand of eris

Justified Ancients of Mummu(JAMS)
the oldest or 2nd oldest of discordian groups, tehy trace their heritage to teh time when priesthood of anceint sumeria siezed power by procaliming the god of chaos Mummu dead. they enjoy activism and liek to mix physical means with illuminati magic to achieve their goals. they soemtimes work with the illuminati and sometimes against them. their tactics include criminal organizations such as the hell's angels to disrupt the establishment(or create their own)
symbol : the sacred chao

Illuminati
soemtimes caliming to seek enlightemnt for all humanity, and sometimes using the promise thereof to control humanity, the illuminati use their own inhouse magic systems and conspiratorial infiltration of any and all organizations to achieve their aims. often misunderstood because of their tactics, they strongly identify with the pentagonal side of the holy chao. they disrupt the establishment by manipulating and abusing it working throught the orders of discordia, causing their enemies to take action.
symbol:baleful eye in a pyramid

legion of dynamic discord
a super secret group of mystics and criminals, this bunch runs around smuggling illegal goods in a yellow submarine, disrupting gov't and illuminati operations. they use illuminati magic and activist means like the JAMs, however they refuse to be locked into rigid systems and wil often break the magic systems adding their own discordant element.
symbol: a golden apple.

Erision Liberation Front:
the most mysterious of all discordian aspects, ELFs prefer to sit otu of the action and watch from afar, subtely influencing events by sipping on tao juice. they only work through the other groups, often manipualting them in order to balance or forward what they see as the proper path to universal enlightement. their tradition dates back to lao tzu adn hung mung, who were the same person but not the same individual.
symbol: a circle with an infinite circumference and a centrepoint that is nowhere.


of course this is rather rough, and i'll proably have to revise it for elaboration whatnot.

walking is great. some of the greatest thinkers have walked, adn not only is it great for the mind, but also for the body and soul.

i walk everywhere, wether it's to work or to the bar, or home from teh bar, walking is what i do. i used to walk to a different town to get to work, only 45 minutes, but much more invigorating than the 5 minute bus ride. when i tell ppl this they give me a funny look and tell me i must be crazy(so?). m,yfreind's mom when i lived in the area walked everywhere, and despite being late 50's looked not a day over 30(and had sexy legs to boot :D)

so go out and walk, take in teh scenery, meet soem peopel and say hi to people you pass by(or even jsut smile at them) it'll do you, and the world, some good.

(as quoted from where i was evangelising Utopia Temple's Religious section

discordianism and you

yes this is a semi-evangelical thread, since i dare to usurp the status quo hitherto.

verily, you may ask me; what is discordianism, and i will reply in turn; what is not?

for all are discordians, wether thou wish it or not, for all contribute to our lady's plan wether they wish it or not. by being virtuous, or being wicked, one contributes and changes the dynamic of the fundemental forces of order and disorder omni-present in all things.

and who is our lady? none other than Eris Discordia, mother of creation she who's hand guides what is, and she who set forth the events leading to the trojan war with a golden apple.

for those that require proof, i say first look about yourself, and do you not see see the dynamic ebb and flow, the primal push-pull between order and disorder? surely there is a great deal of order in teh universe, and surely this order is set in motion by the fallacy of disorder. if simple metaphysical analogy is not enough, then i refer you to the mathematically sound and scientifcally accepted field of quantum physics.yes mr. einstein, god does play dice with reality.

for those of you to whom faith is the most effective proof, then look no further than Emperor Joshua Norton I, whom convinced Lincoln to fight the civil war not for the eternity of the union of american states, but rather for the emancipation of his fellow human beings. look no further than Kerry Thornly, who did devote himself to the revelation recieved in a bowling alley one fine day in 19956(or maybe '57). look no further than myself, who believeth because he can not refute the indeniable proof presented.


lamenting, my poor mind, i will refer you to the canon of our faith the principia discordia, and leave you with one thought.

it is not that i am necessarily right, but that you are unfathomably wrong. do not despair in thy ignorance tho, for to be ignorant is to be human, and to be omniscient and lacking of ignorance is to be a god, of which we will never be except possibly in death; in which case we will not rememeber the life we lived so much as the lives we lived, will live, and live, and more.

-Episkopos friar Horab fisbalger, ksp, ots, etc, et al, ad infinitum.

ignotium per ignotius[/url]

fuck da police!
   -NWA

"You'd PAY to know what you REALLY think."
-Dobbs 1961

and fuck all those other pseudo bullshit futurist writers, who you've read, adored, and now think exactly alike and quote at every waiting turn.

fuck them! they sold you a book and you bought their mind and thought processes and can't seem to get away from it. what have they written that you can't see beyond? what have they pretensed that you cannot out pretence.  the only reason,  or at least one of the only reasons, they haven't told you to do teh same is simple. they make a living outof telling you how to think, how to arrange your attitudes, how to keep an open mind according to their guidelines, how to be come a medium to the dogstar sirius aliens, how to prepare for timewave zero to collapse in 2012, how to fuck like a weirdo cuz missionary is for norms only.

fuck niel gaiman, terrence mckenna, robert anton wilson, and especially an other fuck who goes around making money off the counterculture.  fuck the counterculture. the counterculture became so intolerably saturated by capitalism before i was ever born that i can now invest itn eh upcoming counterculture blockbuster from the safety of my own home.

fuck that shit. if these guys were selling such incredible truths,they wouldn't ask you to buy it, they be throing off their clothes and preachign the word from teh streets, writing their workls on the walls, and beating verses relentlessy into lost lawyers and politicians.


their bullshit has become your truth
don't shy away from admitting it, even the great RAW him self has admitted he is full of shit, and i'm not about to do any different.
if reality is what you can get away with, Robert Anton Wilson and his contemporaries have got yall by the fucking calls, or filopian tubes as the case may be.

and for goddes' sake! stop quoting the monsters! is tehre anything worse than the mental enslavement to a supposedly freethinking writer's quotations?oen ofrm of idiocy replaces another, one becomes ever ignorant ont eh pretence of knowing better, one becomes a slave to the promiser of freedom. quote that motherfuckers!.

so what can you do to free yourself of tis venomus plague? what can you do to regain your own mind and thoughts?  

take that futurist collection and BURN IT! save teh cover pages tho, and use them as toilet paper. then send said toilet paper with a hearty fuck you! written on it to the author of the work.