Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Two vast and trunkless legs of stone => Topic started by: hooplala on May 12, 2016, 05:35:24 PM

Title: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: hooplala on May 12, 2016, 05:35:24 PM
(http://i1279.photobucket.com/albums/y522/Rex_Bologna/CiH0xGyWsAEIbcb_zpsobmqbe4e.jpg)

So, the Tucson Saguaros are looking for a name for their mascot.

I believe the only appropriate name for him would be Prick.

If anyone agrees, let's make this happen.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on May 12, 2016, 05:47:18 PM
I feel so sorry for the prick.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: hooplala on May 12, 2016, 05:52:14 PM
I think he should wear green tights.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 12, 2016, 09:33:40 PM
Even our mascots are droopy and tired looking.  He doesn't need green tights, he needs food stains on the front of his outfit, a week's worth of beard, and a bottle of Thunderbird poking out of a pocket.  And then he should be arrested during the very first game for selling bath salts in the bathroom.  Or for getting in a fight with a 16 year old girl in the front row.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 13, 2016, 08:15:00 PM
Tucson should instead take Luna, EoC, Richter, LMNO, any myself as mascots.  Mostly on account of it's pathetic how we all try to be all NICE when we meet up with each other, but we all remember, at some level, the events at Charley's Kitchen.  The fragment I remember was this split-second in time where I was leaning across the bar getting more beer for us.  LMNO was beating the night manager while making noises that sounded like a gorilla in a clothes drier, and Richter had pinned the bartender to the wall with one arm and was cataloguing the man's sins in a friendly-sounding voice.  Luna and EoC just sat at the table, bellowing out the song Mexican Radio.  I looked at the stunned crowd and said "what the fuck were you EXPECTING?  Action/Reaction, fools!  How else did you expect the universe to respond?"

That's all I remember.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: LMNO on May 13, 2016, 08:18:56 PM
I think it would be nice if we were all sewn together like some sort of Frankenstein's Siamese Septuplet Monster.



Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 13, 2016, 08:21:06 PM
Quote from: LMNO on May 13, 2016, 08:18:56 PM
I think it would be nice if we were all sewn together like some sort of Frankenstein's Siamese Septuplet Monster.

I don't remember that bit.

I hope it wasn't my turn to get the drinks.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: LMNO on May 13, 2016, 08:21:47 PM
I meant for the mascot, but come to think of it, those doorways did get hard to navigate through after last call.


Personally, I blame Twid.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: hooplala on May 13, 2016, 08:53:00 PM
Quote from: LMNO on May 13, 2016, 08:18:56 PM
I think it would be nice if we were all sewn together like some sort of Frankenstein's Siamese Septuplet Monster.

There's a word for that: flesh golem.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: minuspace on May 13, 2016, 10:05:56 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/VVNMLM4.jpg)
I'm holding one of them hostage.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: Cain on May 13, 2016, 10:16:47 PM
Quote from: Hoopla on May 13, 2016, 08:53:00 PM
Quote from: LMNO on May 13, 2016, 08:18:56 PM
I think it would be nice if we were all sewn together like some sort of Frankenstein's Siamese Septuplet Monster.

There's a word for that: flesh golem.

A flesh golem would make a great mascot.  They're immune to magic, and non-blunt weapons.  That would make it fairly survivable in downtown Tucson.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: LMNO on May 13, 2016, 10:29:11 PM
I suppose they could nickname it "The Sausage Creature".
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: Cain on May 13, 2016, 10:31:50 PM
"The Eric Pickles" (who may be an IRL flesh golem).

(https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2013-11/enhanced/webdr01/27/5/enhanced-buzz-13176-1385549109-19.jpg)
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: minuspace on May 13, 2016, 10:54:49 PM
Mr. Prickles?
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: Eater of Clowns on May 14, 2016, 03:05:24 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on May 13, 2016, 08:15:00 PM
Tucson should instead take Luna, EoC, Richter, LMNO, any myself as mascots.  Mostly on account of it's pathetic how we all try to be all NICE when we meet up with each other, but we all remember, at some level, the events at Charley's Kitchen.  The fragment I remember was this split-second in time where I was leaning across the bar getting more beer for us.  LMNO was beating the night manager while making noises that sounded like a gorilla in a clothes drier, and Richter had pinned the bartender to the wall with one arm and was cataloguing the man's sins in a friendly-sounding voice.  Luna and EoC just sat at the table, bellowing out the song Mexican Radio.  I looked at the stunned crowd and said "what the fuck were you EXPECTING?  Action/Reaction, fools!  How else did you expect the universe to respond?"

That's all I remember.
I would be part of this mascot team as long as we could still keep The Prick as a name.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on May 14, 2016, 03:17:31 AM
Give him some REALLY good cactus juice and call him Mescalito. That or Cactuar, the Final Fantasy enemy he most resembles.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 14, 2016, 06:24:00 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 14, 2016, 03:05:24 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on May 13, 2016, 08:15:00 PM
Tucson should instead take Luna, EoC, Richter, LMNO, any myself as mascots.  Mostly on account of it's pathetic how we all try to be all NICE when we meet up with each other, but we all remember, at some level, the events at Charley's Kitchen.  The fragment I remember was this split-second in time where I was leaning across the bar getting more beer for us.  LMNO was beating the night manager while making noises that sounded like a gorilla in a clothes drier, and Richter had pinned the bartender to the wall with one arm and was cataloguing the man's sins in a friendly-sounding voice.  Luna and EoC just sat at the table, bellowing out the song Mexican Radio.  I looked at the stunned crowd and said "what the fuck were you EXPECTING?  Action/Reaction, fools!  How else did you expect the universe to respond?"

That's all I remember.
I would be part of this mascot team as long as we could still keep The Prick as a name.

we can do that.  I mean, fuck, it's TUCSON, right?  So we're all sewn together under the stupid green suit, combining the powers of the guy who sweeps up the soggy glitter after the lights come up at the strip joint with those of the guy who insists on doing stage magic tricks at parties.  I demand to be the arse.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: Junkenstein on May 14, 2016, 11:08:58 AM
QuoteI demand to be the arse.

newsfeed.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: Hollis Increase on May 14, 2016, 08:19:33 PM
This might be a little off topic but isn't Saguaro National Park supposed to be known for having the country's biggest cacti?  It just seems like they could've found a taller guy for the suit.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 14, 2016, 11:52:23 PM
Quote from: Hollis Increase on May 14, 2016, 08:19:33 PM
This might be a little off topic but isn't Saguaro National Park supposed to be known for having the country's biggest cacti?  It just seems like they could've found a taller guy for the suit.

That may be more physically accurate, but less spiritually so.  Tucson is best described by a short, depressed-looking man in a really, really cheap mascot outfit.  while people in the background run around on fire, maybe.  And someone's left their senile grandmother in the car and the windows are all up.
Title: Re: Name the Tucson Mascot
Post by: minuspace on May 17, 2016, 12:27:54 AM
The Prick of Rhapsody*

*From Rhapsoidia rhaptein 'to stitch' + Oide 'song, ode'