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I'll be here if you need me --> http://youtu.be/cAQSZhazYk8

Day 4 of no smoking and I can't sleep and I wonder how many windowpanes I can make it through on the first dive. Anyone else quit smoking without harming yourself or others? I have failed to do so and I need pointers.

Back in '08, maybe '09 (can't remember for sure) Cain dumped a zip file of some pretty enlightening books (or "unlightening", depending on your point of view).

I read the vast majority of them,  many of which would have been damn near impossible to find otherwise. I was hoping that we could have a new one with different titles and similar themes, pretty please with whisky on top?

Had one of those blessings in disguise late Friday night. I thought I had totally f'd my computer when I was trying to be a cheapo and make a 990fx chip run on my old 890 board. So, I decided to go through my old drive and do some extra backups of the important stuff. Found an abandoned project I had started on Lucid Dreaming, although I was a bit resistant to the term "lucid."

But one entry I had noticed that really caught my attention. In it, I was trying to expand upon the notion of paradoxical sleep, and what the implications of bringing your waking consciousness into the sometimes chaotic realm of your automated consciousness.

Ok, initially I copied and pasted a friggin' wall of rambling text, but I think it's better if I just give you my conclusion: The paradoxical state, or dreaming, is simply the conscious mind pulling together hundreds of stimuli and memes from a magnitude of waking states you've experienced in your life, while attempting to file away the most recent stimuli in a manner of not just compiling for later retrieval... but for a reference point to analyze the "new" data. It's when your teacher uses a metaphor or a mnemonic device to teach you something complex and novel, but your brain is doing it at such a rate of speed, it forms a narrative (albeit, barely coherent). It's the only time when the mind's temporal analysis is no longer linear because it's analyzing newer and old data as the same. When people are "lucid" they aren't bringing waking consciousness back into the dreams with them, they are simply engaging in the only true form of metacognition, that being, the mind watching the mind reading itself.

One sentence summary: The idea of being awake in your dreams is an instance in which the mind truly recognizes itself as process, rather than a state.

I bring this to PD'ers attention because I finally got around to reading the Common Walls last week. I recalled, when I was active in dream work, analysis and building lucid experiences, that during my waking life (what the LD community refers to as CR, or Consensus Reality) in the days following a lengthy state of awareness while dreaming that I sometimes had a lot of trouble playing along. Like when you're doing a redundant task (Chopping olives, painting a wall, data entry, etc.) and occasionally come out of your day dream and ask yourself "Ok, what am I doing here?" and find yourself unable to perform a simple set of steps you had just been doing over and over again at a rapid pace, not two seconds prior. One of my journal articles noted arriving at lunch with a friend, being handed a menu, and suddenly I had no idea how to make a decision of what I wanted to eat. Was I even hungry? What do I feel like when I'm hungry, and how have I made this decision in the past? When I read these words, they signify what I will be served, but what happened to the impulse that usually ignites when I read one of these words and say "That is what I want to eat?"

Pulling away from the idea of dream awareness, where do you find yourselves in this almost paralytic level of analysis, realizing exactly how little you understand or know, but rather, initiate your responses and actions without too much conscious thought?

A few hours ago,  I learned a good friend of mine committed suicide. In addition to heartbroken friends such as myself, he leaves behind a wife,  son,  and daughter.

He was one of the last great people I know. They certainly don't make them like that anymore. He was a wood carver, and had made some of the most beautiful works I have ever seen. He had lost a 2 year old daughter early last year,  and hadn't really come back from that.

I'm pretty shaken up, but what's really getting to me is the stupid things people say. "He was depressed and wasn't seeking treatment...", "He wasn't coping with the loss well," and "I'm shocked, but not surprised."

What the hell is it with people? Why do they say shit like that? Why say anything at all? If we simply spent 10 minutes in silence on the phone,  I wouldn't have thought anything of it. Even a "man, that sucks..."

I wish he was here. He was the type that would call this shit for what it was. I remember around Christmas when a relative asked him "How many kids do you two want?" Yeah, asking the guy going through his first Christmas without his youngest. His reply, "All of them."

I'm hurting, but after these conversations, I'm angry too. I'm starting to see the shitty support system he had. Why are we stuck with such dipshits, this day and age?

Sorry... Just needed to let loose. Take care PD'ers.

I'm trying to finish a manuscript that's due on 12/31... Of last year. Through the shades there's flashes of red and blue, and I peek out to see four cruisers. It's the Colored Light Brigade and they're all over the place. I can't figure out what's going on. Here's what I can see:

-Something is wet on the road, a big puddle, and doesn't look like anything splashed (but not water, because it's 22 degrees out, so it would have frozen)
-Some older looking lady has a belt in her hand and is talking to one officer, and he doesn't have his notepad out, or seem like it's an official thing
-One car is parked, but with two wheels on the curb, can't see any damage
- No road flares
- occasionally,  someone will point up at the top of the house across the street and people will look up
- One of the police officers reached in his car and started blasting that "Burning Heart" song that was in one of the Rocky movies,  and everyone started smiling,  then one walked over and appeared to be chewing him out until he turned it off.
-Nothing smashed or broken is on the pavement
-A little girl came out the front door of the previously mentioned house and everyone yelled for her to get inside,  almost like they were worried something would happen

What the hell is going on??

My girls watch a lot of cartoons on Netflix. I've noticed in a bunch of them there's a villain associated with Discord. Only examples I can think of off the top of my head are My Little Pony (the character's name is simply Discord) and Grim Adventures of Bill and Mandy (where the villain is Eris herself,  complete with golden K apple). There's a couple others but I'm on day 3 of no nicotine, and my brain is absolute shit, today.

So,  I guess the powers that be decided discord is a bad thing.  In fairness,  one episode of the latter Mandy says destroying the Golden apple will end existence,  since order cannot exist without disorder, etc. Which I guess is nice.

I mean,  I have enough to deal with,  having a mother who tells my kids daddy's "witchcraft" will result in damnation (not into Wicca, that's just what my turboCatholic mom considers Discordianism). Now cartoons are teaching my kids this shit? Now I have to be a responsible parent and actually monitor their media intake...? Screw+that.

I don't do well with total freedom to pursue my creative desires.

As a XXX-Mas gift, my wife's girlfriend bought me a gift certificate for a domain registry and 2 years of unlimited space and bandwidth to "Make a part of the World Wide Web [my] own."

I've sat in front of Wordpad for the last two hours and I cannot, for the life of me, come up with anything. I have a white canvas, symbolically speaking, and I don't even know what colors I want on my pallet (also symbolically speaking).

Please, PD... throw shit out there to get my brain going. Whatever first pops in your mind, I don't care if it's a bad or good idea because I DON'T HAVE ANY IDEAS ISUCKATLIFESOGODDAMNMUCH!!!!!!!SHINOBI!!!

So, I want to be abducted and sexually abused by aliens. I've been on pain medication for three days and I haven't poomped, so I figure a good probin' will unleash the pile.

I've been sniffing glue and meditating with Richard Marx blasting on my headphones while facing alpha centauri, with my dick on a skateboard,8,1

Nothing.  What|the|fupp?!

Is it because I don't have tin foil? All they sell is aluminum.  So, need help: How poomp? Where ET?

[dedicated]

Since everything I've posted here starts with a meandering backstory, I'll instead post my intentions first, then fill you in.

Simply, I would like PD'ers to brainstorm ways that Wal-Mart can be taken down. Any idea, no matter how off the wall it is. I want to see this through, I want to end that company, and I want nothing more than every Walton to hang themselves when they discover they are only two bankruptcies away from standing in a soup line.

Backstory (the following has a degree of artistic license, as to make it easier to stomach):
I've been at a lull in my professional life. I haven't been able to get motivated, and I haven't completed anything remotely presentable to publishers in a long time. I've since returned to my other job full time. It was a moderate paying part-time that I held onto so I could provide health insurance for the wife and kids. I've just felt completely shitty, and I know it's because I can't just get myself to get my shit together.

After having a long conversation with a former colleague who invited me to his massive house, last night (his most recent textbook making obscene amounts of money), we got on the topic of Life and quantum physics. He's a science guru, and he's one of those who is too polite to tell me I'm drunk and talking out of my ass. Thanks to my state of mind, I kept shifting the conversation to how my current state applies to whatever specific theme we were touching on, because I'm a dick like that. He's a good enough guy that he humored me in this regard, even though it was probably the last thing he wanted to discuss. He pointed out that I've had some success in my past, but every time it's usually followed by a period of languidness until I reach the point where my situation is severe, then I usually turn it around to get another little taste of success. He said that Tolstoy did something similar (or maybe it was Dostoyevski... I can't remember, nor be bothered to Google it), in which he would publish a novel that would earn him considerable amounts of money, only to then gamble himself into debt, forcing him to write another great work. For that author, he said, it was the only way he could achieve the level of clarity and focus necessary to get to that creative state... to have his very livelihood hinging upon his next work. My friend's suggestion was that I was in the same boat, but for me, it was slightly different, because for me it was a matter of getting so bored with my life, I have to find something inspiring and challenging to get to the next "mountaintop."

His suggestion was to find something seemingly impossible to defeat. He then asked what angers me more than anything in the world, and I said "the mighty exploiting the weak and desperate." So, we thought of some situations that particularly disgusted me, and the first one I mentioned was child sex slaves. After some discussion, we decided that I would most likely get myself killed, so it'd be better if I pursued something in which the opposition would be less eager to shoot me in the head. I then mentioned something awful my wife's friend just went through... employment at Wal-Mart. My wife's friend is a very caring and wonderful person, but she isn't very smart, and she has had the most unlucky life of anyone I've ever met. Without getting into her life story (trust me, it would make you want to douse yourself in gas, then nuke the planet), she went to work for them because she was in a shitty situation where her husband had just died of leukemia, leaving her with three wonderful children (4, 7, and 9), a trailer they were still paying for, tens of thousands of dollars in medical debt from her now dead husband's treatment (we tried to get her to divorce him so the debt would die with him, but she said she couldn't do it because "[She] made a promise to God that, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer..."etc), and her previous employer fired her after 10+ years of dedicated service (she had to schedule the funeral for the evening because they wouldn't give her the day off, I shit you not) after she asked for a raise to help her in this situation.

So, the only job she was able to find was Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart wouldn't schedule around picking up or taking care of the kids, so my wife and her sister were taking care of them, and sometimes she wouldn't even get to see them for 5 minutes to kiss them goodnight. But then she started seeing them more because when she hit 6 months, they cut her down so she was working 27 hours a week (Wal-Mart considers 28 hours "full time" to receive health benefits, I guess). Only, when I say "working 27 hours", I mean "scheduled for 27 hours" because almost every day they told her to punch out before going back for another hour or two to "zone out", which doesn't mean what you and I think it means. To "zone" something means clean it up and fix the merchandise displays in that area. So, she worked 50-60 hour weeks at $8.25/hr (minimum where I'm at), but only getting paid for 40 of it, for six months. And desperately clinging to the hope that if she manages to make it to 6 months, she can finally get health insurance and stop living in fear that her kids may get sick or go to the hospital. However, then Wal-Mart not only didn't qualify her for health insurance, they were cutting her hours to the point where she has "borrowed" money from us, so she can eat (they've been without power for almost a month), and providing her with information on how to get Medicaire and WIC. As if it wasn't fucked up already, she came to my house crying uncontrollably. Wal-Mart fired her. They said it was because she was "failing to be a team player." While she sat in my kitchen, crying and shaking, saying over and over again "What am I going to do?!", I contacted a friend who has a son working there part-time this summer to see what the hell happened. He knew exactly why she got fired: she was in the break room and when one of the older women was asking about her husband's funeral, she mentioned that one of his old union pals (from the candy factory he worked at until it closed back in 2003 or 2004) placed their union patch in the casket with him during Last Respects. I guess a few minutes after that, one of the managers was asking everybody where she was, and soon after she was walked out. I asked her if she remembered that conversation, and she nodded. I didn't have the heart to tell her that's most likely the reason she got fired.

So, after everything she's endured, Wal-Mart fired her because her dead husband was in a Union a decade ago. Or, because she wasn't a team player, if you want to believe they're story.

After explaining to my friend that we're considering letting her move in with our family, since she doesn't have any money, they're losing the trailer, and we've been practically feeding them since (unemployment only pays 60% of what you were earning before, so thanks to those 27 hour weeks, she's getting a whopping $106 a week to support she and her three kids, and no Cobra because she didn't have insurance, so fuck her, right?), he told me that my next task is to take down Wal-Mart.* I said "Ah, so David versus Goliath." And his reply was "You don't even have a slingshot, and Wal-Mart is the largest employer and retail outfit in the world, so it's more like Lazarus versus Jericho."

Wal-Mart and their proprietors are the scum of the earth (the people working there have my sympathies), and if they were a country, they would be the 25th richest country in the world. An evil regime and a force that must be not only stopped, but dismantled, and shit upon. Please help me think of creative ways that I could do that.

*My friend gave me a very large sum of money to help her out. She wouldn't take it, at first, but I told her that if she didn't, my friend would be heartbroken.

I remember the Chao Te Ching, but did we ever start compiling a series of Koans?

Search is not helping.

Caution: Potential trigger for sexual assault victims.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_zTrEDaPs8k

Summary of vid: Woman is illegally searched in family court by a bailiff, in front of her very frightened daughter, sexually assaulted, judge does nothing, then the woman is fucking arrested for "making false allegation against police officer" (a statute that does not exists).

After vid: The guy loses his job, and files wrongful termination suit which he may actually win because the judge did nothing to stop it which, by some severe oversight in the law, means he cannot be held accountable. The woman is filing a lawsuit against the county, because (if you note the previous sentence) the guy is not going to be arrested or charged with his crimes, the defendants are now his superiors, who may or may not have tried to cover up the deed.

Punch line: The taxpayers are in the awful position where they will have to pay both the victim and the perpetrator of a particularly nauseating crime.

Article for further rage:
http://www.8newsnow.com/story/21859858/i-team

Again, the video will leave you shaking and wanting blood. Do not watch if you we're having a nice day, or (if you're like me) and you have daughters. 

This video ->  http://vimeo.com/64687161

EDIT - Sorry, forgot this warning: NSFW and NSFE (E=Epileptics)

*USA

I was trying to navigate my radio around the AM stations to find a local broadcast my friend was going to be featured on, and I came across the insane rumblings of a radio personality I had heard of, but was not familiar with. I listened for a few minutes out of general curiosity, when I heard this gem:

"...what Americans don't realize is that feminism is the first way Socialism and Fascism introduces itself into a country's fabric. Once we're ok with giving women all of these privileges, they start pushing other ways to break capitalism down. Femenism ruins society, and it is why we have so many single mothers spending a lifetime on welfare and expanding the entitlements that give liberals and socialists the support to destroy the free market system."

Later...

"Why do you have to pay [women] the same? There's plenty of things they can't do as well as men, so why do employers who are already forced to hire them have to pay them the same?"

Now, these quotes are from memory, so it may have been worded a little differently, but it got me to wondering about something. I wish I could directly ask this guy (probably would get screened by the producers, though), "What is your problem with women? What is so wrong about women that you came to these conclusions?"

Basically, I don't understand it. To look at the basic definition of Conservative viewpoints, there's nothing to indicate they should give a shit about feminism, one way or another.  I get that they don't like Affirmative Action, but outside of that, how does that have any bearing on feminism? Feminism, to me, is the simple understanding that women should have equal rights. Makes sense to me. Even as a man, I don't see how that can have any negative effects on me.

Where does this knee jerk disdain for women and women's rights come from? Even if I play devil's advocate and consider it's a religious influence from the Christian Right, I'm still not seeing it. The Catholic Church, for a time, were the ones pushing for women's rights, as we're many Protestant religions.

What is it about women that makes their stance so combative? Even if we assume this guy and a handful of others have issues with their masculinity, I don't see how that could carry over into the philosophy of such a large percentage of conservatives? There's got to be a big reason I'm overlooking, that may not seem apparent at first.

Paging TGRR.

[By the Constitution we hold as the foundation of this great country they are innocent until a court of their peers... Americans, I must reiterate... finds them guilty, and whomever is to blame for what happened in Boston on Monday was an asshole.]

So our long national phantasm seems to have hit the exhaust valve. They got Suspect #2. From herein I will refer to them as 1 and 2, as I really don't have the energy to look up the proper spelling of their name, let alone repeat it throughout everything that will I will spew, henceforth. He was captured hiding in a boat, under a tarp, like a scared little boy. For most of us Americans, that's how we have been since Monday.

Let's start with Monday. The real explosion was the detonation of the dreaded thermonuclear media, which leads us up to the mountain pass; and "...beyond is a different country." Or, so you would think, at first glance. I was in the doctor's office, waiting for my follow up appointment to remove some stitches and end a lengthy recovery from what seemed a minor accident, at first. I looked up at the television to see Fox News blowing up, and the words "Multiple explosions at the Boston Marathon" on the screen. I shook my head and looked down at my iPhone. It's not so much that I didn't care, at the time. I didn't want to care. I didn't want to go through another media orgy, where the prompt and careless fucking of every crevice within reach was the objective, rather than pursuit of making sure all those involved are embraced in the manner they deserve.

A woman sitting next to me looked over and said, "Did you see this?" Almost as if she was under the sick impression I was going to be able to avoid it, somehow. "Lady," I wanted to say, "The media's got an unattended backpack for every one of us. I can assure you I'll get the brunt of it, same as everyone else." But my reply was simply an acknowledging grunt and a "What are ya gonna do?" shrug. She seemed bothered by this. She leaned over and said, "Those better not be Muslim bombs." I couldn't contain myself, at this point. "What are Muslim bombs?" I asked, feigning earnestness. "Oh, you know," she exclaimed...

"The kind that kill innocent people."

Ah, unlike those American bombs that are designed with such precision, not one civilian Iraqi, Afghan, Libyan, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese, or Bosnian has ever felt it's wrath. Only evil folks get hit by those. If I had the energy or wherewithal, I would have warned her how careless our American bombs can be.

Like the one that hit Sunil Trapathi's family. Or the one that hit the guy in the blue robe with shrapnel. Or maybe, and it pains me to admit, the one aimed at the backwoods Libertarian militia types. The ones descending upon Russians, Chechens, and lukewarm delusional Muslims. Granted, these bombs may not break a single skin cell on those folks, but like my poor spleen three weeks ago... sometimes the most devastating injuries can't be seen, or noticed, until you slowly bleed out without dropping as much as a single drop of life onto the pavement. Where's the regard, or push for getting those people justice? What have we done to deserve a Fourth Estate more concerned with conducting itself like TMZ commenters rushing to each new post with "First!" in lieu of trying to communicate thoughtful and accurate analysis of something this discombobulating?

But the live feed is offline, and the reporters are checking out of the hotels; heading back to their respective homes. Those lacking limbs, family, friends, or the heart to carry on...? Well, the dead will bury the dead, I guess. There's other spectacles to capture. This one's at its afterglow. 5 dead, over 100 injured, and a very confused teen is sitting in a hospital with a Demerol drip, trying to make sense of the chaos and the mistakes he made. Those who lost their children in Sandy Hook elementary are grieving somewhere, living with an inescapable pain the rest of the country anesthetized themselves to with a quick change of the channel and return to their daily banality some will never regain. Their children's photos are frozen in time, but thoughtfully cached by Google and its brethren.

Meanwhile, this. But the family and friends of those 27 innocent people should have known better than to live in a Middle Eastern country or, at the least, not schedule their tragedy so soon after we had a sporting event rudely interrupted with something we typically outsource to nations such as theirs. As crass as it may have seemed at the time, this was probably the most polite manner in which certain countries could have offered their condolences.

Not to say Krystle Campbell, Martin Richard, Lu Lingzi, deserved even a scratch. Or Sean Collier, for that matter. He served and protected, and without his efforts, it's very possible we would be still wondering just what happened to Suspect 1 and 2. We never did find John Doe #2, did we? But do we extend the same heartfelt regard for his sacrifice as we do these 13 policemen? I had trouble finding this tragedy on CNN.

I was not immune to being sucked in to this cultural psychosis. While on Reddit, a thread began (which has since been deleted, but replaced with this) when someone posted a link to a live feed of the Boston Police and EMS scanner, saying that police were heading to a property to investigate. From there, things took a turn for the weird. The address proved to be a simple domestic complaint, and redditors actually expressed disappointment that they were robbed of experiencing history, firsthand. Fate would have the last laugh. A 7-11 robbery came over the radio, which everyone promptly ignored as (if I remember the quote, accurately) "...routine for big cities like Boston.". A few minutes later, when the call came over the radio exclaiming "Officer down!" everyone went into a frenzy, but still thought it an unrelated phenomenon, and there was a discussion of whether to move it into a different subreddit, or delete it altogether (which may have been the reason it was). But the folly continued, and I stayed up until 3 o'clock listening in and posting, like every other idiot in that thread. What's interesting is that it was a long time before it was revealed the robbery and shooting of the officer were actually related to the events of the Boston Marathon Bombing. I wish the thread still existed, because it was a perfectly poignant specimen of how a large group of people all over the world could have unfettered access to so much information, yet the true narrative got lost in the cacophony and alarum of what those that participated considered thoughtful observation.

Perhaps, the worst is still ahead of us. With all the pesky logistics out of the way, America can now feel free to speculate to the motives of this act. Suspect 1 was well trained in the art of savagely injuring another man for sport. Suspect 2 was very successful in his efforts to overpower opponents with force, in hopes an objective third party would formally recognize it with a forceful slap on the mat.  Both grew up, spent most of their lives, and were citizens of a country with one of the highest violent crime rates in the industrialized world. That would seem the simplest of explanations.

"But," many would rightfully assert, "There are millions of people who partake in boxing and wrestling, worldwide. There are hundreds of millions of Americans who don't commit acts of terror. There are scores of people who use pressure cookers for nothing more violent than kickass pot roasts. You can't ascribe these variables to the actions of individuals."

Sadly, the objectiveness corrodes, and the same people will then observe that Suspect 2 liked Islam on social networking sites (as 1.6 billion people worldwide would), both had been born in Chechnya, and lived some of their younger years in what used to be part of the Soviet Union, and Suspect 1 took a holiday to Russia. To listen to these deranged self-professed profilers, the simplest explanation is that these two were sleeper Soviet operatives, programmed before they were run out of their homeland to destroy America (the Free), brainwashed by a religion of which 98% are non-violent, only to have their body count beaten by the spontaneous combustion of material we use to make plants grow.

That's the simplest answer, right?

But to the rest of us, the hypothesis with the fewest assumptions is this:

By the Constitution we hold as the foundation of this great country they are innocent until a court of their peers... Americans, I must reiterate... finds them guilty, and whomever is to blame for what happened in Boston on Monday was an asshole.

But their peers have already started tying the noose before the jury has been selected. With the ubiquitous nature of today's global media reach, the only place Suspect 2 will get a fair trial is Shangri La. Somewhere, James Holmes languishes in a cell, playing with his eyebrows and wondering if someone could ever genetically construct a blue raddish, and Jared Loughner masturbates furiously to the thought of raping Spongebob Squarepants. Ryan Lanza's a pile of ashes at points unknown. Their names will far outlast those of their unfortunate victims, and America will carry on until the next media spectacle shakes its keys in front of the population.

Somewhere I and millions of law-abiding people with a serious concern for my fellow man will sit to the side, hoping that one day we'll snap out of this hysteria, and return to the simplest understanding of why we are here and what is happening in the world around us: "We're here to help each other get through this thing. Whatever it is."

Challenge:

1) Smoke sizable quantity of an illegal drug
2) Play this video
3) See if you can make it all the way through without either a) Having a nervous breakdown, b) Seizure, or c) fappping

! NSFW, NSFL, NSFFL, BTW !

I'm placing this thread here as a public service.

Occasionally, I will Google a word/phrase that will yield less than desirable results (or, desirable, depending on what assists buoyancy of your dinghy). Most of the time it's a typo, but other times I use an odd combination of words, or misspell one word in combination with another and, voila: unexpected weirdness.

Here's a list of words you may want to be careful with in Google:
- Sounding
- Plugged
- roman shower
- cisgender (This was the king of Apple autocorrect head-scratchers... Honestly, how badly did I spell "designer" that they thought this is what I meant?)
- stuffer/stuffed
- crush film <--Unless you want to hate humanity more, don't look into this one. Just take my word for it.
- poz

Feel free to contribute.

My cousin just gave me 2cb for Christmas. Wife and kids are staying at the in laws until later tomorrow, and I want some fucked up movies with bizarre visuals. Not mindfuck movies, just fucked up. I'm thinking more Meet the Feebles and Songs from the 2nd Floor rather than Moon or TimeCrimes.

Oh, and I already own half of Takashi Miike's work, so don't bother suggesting any of his.

Did you know that eating four peaches in an afternoon causes fast poomp?

I did not know this.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_Kong

?

That's been there a while, too.

Lately, I can't seem to go to a single news site without seeing a report of someone supposedly on bath salts stripping naked, eating the face off some Jehovah's Witness, then sticking his dick in the mashed potatoes for good measure. Taking a moment to consider the history of modern man, I'm starting to wonder if it wasn't ancient aliens, but rather, bath salts that were behind some of man's most memorable moments.

Rather than HIMEOBS photos, could we have a thread where we HOBS photos? Like, have HOBS in big sans serif with an arrow pointing to the individual under the influence? Little help?

/not a creative type, today

I'm gonna dip my balls in it!

What is says on the tin + original commericals.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbF_ecnlyTk

I don't know why I'm doing this.

I have trouble getting things.

It's like... um, you know...

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/2011/09/05/110905sh_shouts_rudnick

I'm having the worst colitis attack right now, and it sucks really bad. Basically, I'm farting blood and brown mucous 12-15 times a day.

To make matters worse, my wife is watching "Bachelor Pad."

Seriously... "Vapid" is a severe understatement. At first I hung on, hoping they were trying to be ironic, then I thought "well, maybe it's just poorly acted script." When I started gnawing on the coffee table I realized that... not only are there people out there like this, but we pay a lot of attention to them. 

Things is bad.

Used Slackware a few years back, and I thought I'd give Ubuntu a go... Figured I got the HD space, and a jacked Phenom 6-core, why the fuck not?


Erm... I really like it.

Do I have to take medication, or is this ok?

...best thing you can order at an ice cream stand.


Thread over.

So, here's a crazy ass idea...

What if we were to slip ourselves into the libertarian movement? This is kinda like TeaPartyGASM, Iron Troll Brigade, and something else all rolled into one. Only, we're not looking to disrupt their gig. Just veer it in a different direction.

Look, these people are fucking insane. A lot of them already believe in the Illuminati, NWO, and all sorts of other shit. If we feed off of that, and carefully invent conspiracies, like (off the top of my head): President Obama is spreading AIDS in hopes that a more communicable and airborne strain called Dron.F will be created, as to eliminate 2/3 of our population. You know, really insane stuff, but with our memes embedded in it ("Dron.F?" Ok, it was a shitty example, but I think you see what I'm getting at.). These people are stuck in a strange loop and it is unfortunate. But, as my dad used to say "The resourceful will tout a flat tire as a good brake."

Maybe their ill fortune can be our gain. Look at the unparalleled manner in which they perpetuate utter bullshit and hypocrisy.

We should exploit it.

Instead of finding ourselves at odds with these people, maybe we should take the exact opposite approach? We can flip them later, but for now, I think they can help us plant seeds.

...or fuck me.

I really felt bad for this guy who was standing outside of a Chinese restaurant a few minutes ago. He was yelling at some white guy who was walking away from him and, near as I could tell, they were arguing about a car.

Anyhoo...

It came to out and out cursing at each other, and name calling. Everyone on the street turned around and listened to the white guy hurling various racial slurs and getting the desired effect. The black guy, on the other hand, only had "cracker"... er, "cracka-bitch", and it really wasn't fazing the white guy.

I mean, think about it. 80% of the people in the area were white, and they weren't in the least bit offended by "Cracker." But it was plain to see the 10-15% of black people there were ready to chase the white guy down and crack his skull.

Black people need more ammunition. Can anyone think of some colloquial terms that may be useful? Or, at the least, maybe we could make a few up and spread them around?

Or maybe, we could make a personal sacrifice and at least try to be offended when we're called "cracker?"

CAUTION: THIS LINK WILL MAKE YOU HATE HUMANITY MORE

I'm everything I would have detested 2 years ago. I'm drunk in an airport, using the company provided BB, texting to my pregnant wife and psycho kids "daddy loves u"...etc

What few points, if any, have I gained by posting on PD?

 

http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/03/10/us-wisconsin-idUSTRE72909420110310?feedType=RSS&feedName=domesticNews

I'm so fucking pissed I could just put my fist through a triple pane window. I've watched as the ogliarchy/plutocracy has chipped away at everything that we had taken back from the robber barons. Everything that made this country almost bearable is being fucked with a corkscrew.

What the hell can I do? I don't live in Wisconsin. I mean, aside from donating money to ActBlue or MoveOn.org... since they all so adeptly pussyfooted through their opportunity to fix things, what is there? It's obvious the typical means just aren't going to work.

TGRR, ECH, Cain, what do we do? I'm almost a thousand miles away, I got not so much money, and I'm just a little guy, how can I fix this?

Anything. Hell, get bella on here to show me some black magic or something. Action is necessary, and I've been such a candy-ass for so long (assuming the natural order of things would fix themselves, I guess... I know, very naive) I have no idea what to do.

If it's best to let alone, fine... how do I get rid of this urge to stabbity stab GOPers and Tea Party fux?

Let it be understood that the Chtonic beast exists, tentacles and manacles extending and permeating every aspect of our seemingly conscious existence. It doesn't lurk, but rather, it mocks in the traditional sense. It stands before us: so convincing as a direct representation of our own actions, we go beyond its intended design. Whereas they only wished to fool us into watching our own shadows on the cavern wall, we've become so inverted in our thinking, we've "discerned" these as not our shadows, but true representations of ourselves.

They began by replicating indiscriminately. With only one lie at the heart of their mission "To oppress, suppress, and repress" they were dispatched to every crevice of the earth. With an endless supply of resources, thanks to exploits spilt in higher levels of a rarely forking pedigree, they danced, smiled, embraced, and spoke only as we taught them to. By learning to be human, they would revert us to primates.

I do not want to have a beer with any of them.

The doomsday device was then unleashed. They weaved a fabric of lies around the branches of history, and tangled lunacy within. They drew reference to their conspiracy as if it were the work of generations of masterminds and conquerors, always at the helm of society's lifeblood: the revered cha-ching.

Ever present was a conspiracy, but one of superstition and clunky formality that still has yet to become self-aware. It is not the aggression of a falsely-enlightened majority, but rather, a retarded chimpanzee with a hair-trigger pistol. We pacify and satiate it's demands, not for fear of the power beholdeth, but the idiocy possessed.

All the while, there were dark rooms, cloaks, daggers, secret societies, stolen software, fluttering butterflies, and pencil shavings glued to the ceiling. The ogliarchy existed, but it's power stemmed from perpetuating tales involving abilities they never had. Truth be told, had JFK removed the top in any other city, there were plenty of pissed off people ready to remove his. They never had to hypnotize Sirhan Sirhan, they merely had to plant a notebook and some eyedrops.

They've never had hundreds of strings to pull to move the marionette, they merely had to tie the thread to the appendages of the players and let them do what they always had done before.

By kicking the paranoia into overdrive, it made a truth so easily apparent to a five year old, elusive to the greatest adult minds. With the onslaught of so much information, we fail to simplify it.

We see drones bombing caves and carrying out surveillance, we know all commercial planes have autopilot, yet we want to know who was financing the cement company in a building nearby.

We complain about the funds distributed in TARP, the bonuses and vacations, and other unsavory expendatures resulting... and we ignore the fact that we can't even discern if the money ever changed hands.

We analyze every music video and television show for the nefarious messages of mind control from the powers that be, we rage against the mediums that perpetuate messages we find abhorrent, and slowly the "Power" button is used less and less and less... until we forget who holds it in the first place.

The solution to everything is simple...If I may refer to the metaphor above, we must mock the chimpanzee as it had mocked us. We stand about, with guns to our heads, pulling the trigger until the primate forgets it's the only one in possession of bullets.     

Wife's pregnant again, chri$tma$ was not cheap, and my jackhammer of a publisher is getting on my case.

I have to have a treatment and outline by end of business day January 3, or else they get to reneg my advance, and I may have to find a real job or pen under contract if such occurs.

Despite this, my creativity sucks feathers right now, and I'm not in the mood to resort to psychoactives... at least, not while the kids are home from school.

Please do as the subject requests.

If you were born between 1979-1983, pull out your CDs from your high school years and take a listen. There's a reason we dabbled in the classic rock... the rock circumstance around our time sucked, didn't it?

Jesus, I mean you look at every late adolescent hard rock culture wave up until that point it's "Hey it was _________, but we were getting laid."

Late 60's - "Hey, it was hippydom, but we were getting laid."
Mid 70's - "Hey, it was alternately turbulent and drugged induced, but we were getting laid."
Early 80's - "Hey, it was coked out, but we were getting laid."
Late 80's - "Hey, it was really coked out, but we were getting laid."
Late 80's (Private college subset) - "Hey, it was really boring, but we were wearing berets whilst getting laid." (see Uncle Buck)
Early 90's - "Hey, it was art school and melodramatic, but we were getting laid."

....?

Late 90's - "Hey, it was needlessly aggressive and misogynist, but we... um... broke a lot of shit."

I mean, it was the Napster-era. Maybe we were just dipping our toes in the sensory overload and short attention span spin, but what the fuck was all of that pissy, c-tuned, kick-things deal about?

I'm cleaning out the garage and finding CDs I know my kids won't proudly display on their wall like I did my dad's albums. They'll listen to... I dunno... Mudshovel, or something, or they'll watch footage of Woodstock '99 or Ozzfest and ask "What the hell were you guys getting all pissy about?"

We were probably pissed about how bad our era's music was. There was no fucking alternative for us. What the hell were we going to do, pull it back a couple years, wear sweaters with one stripe and finger chicks to Our Lady Peace, Live, or Matchbox 20?

Worded differently, I brought this up in another forum and I got:

"What are you talking about? Did you forget Fuel and Creed became popular around that time?"



[At that very moment, god rained blood and fire down upon his creation.]

To make matters worse, this rant has little external validity. If you weren't at that age at that time, you've blocked it out of your iPod, read this, and said "What is he talking about?"

I don't know. I got a garage full of shit I can't do shit with. That's all.

Just now I hear a clicking and squeaky noise in the heater. At first I thought "piece of crap." Then I realized it's hot as hell, and the heater isn't on. So I crack open the heater and see a mouse. I think "Awww... Poor little guy..." and try to get him out so I can put him outside.

The mouse flew into the kitchen.

Instinctually, I yell "OH FICK!" because in that split second I couldn't decide between fuck and frick. I grab a shoe, swung and knocked him out of the air. But then he's on the stairs leading to the front door, Trying to get off his back. I lunged, fell down the stairs, ass over tea kettle, and still manage to thwack the bastard flat. Tossed him outside and my wife demands to know why I woke her up with my Fick and thwacks and clunk clunk down the stairs. I also got yelled at for using one of my good shoes.

So why is it I was totally cool with the mouse, and when I saw it was a bat, I instantly went apebatshit?

So, I had a dream last night that I was working for a super secret organization, and I was given an encrypted file by a guy named Stiletto to hack into.

In the dream, I start thinking about how to decrypt it for a bit, and then I suddenly think "Houdini..." and try opening the file without a password. BING! It works. The "encrypted" was a ruse. Once a decryption tool was used on it, the file would have locked up, but because I tried opening it without any password or anything, it works.

This morning, on another of the message boards I visit, someone posts a link to the WikiLeaks deal. WikiLeaks, it appears, has uploaded what they call "an insurance" file onto the interwebs and have torrented the shit out of it. The guy who posted it? His handle is "SkiNNy_knife."

I was seriously considering giving it a try. I mean aes256 is not the type of encryption that'll be ripped into with brute force or an Atari portfolio... but seriously? The NSA has to have something that'll tear into it, no problem. It's gotta be either a ruse... or something they know the goons wouldn't even try.

I'm thinking about downloading it but I'm <subject line>

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r90oeuY-Wxw

Guy buys his washer and dryer and is refused customer service from Best Buy.

How do you program a broken mind? Rather, how do you unprogram? I'm having one of those nights where one part of me is saying "dude, if you were anyone else, I'd be laughing... heartily... at your utterly pathetic mindset," and the other is like "But I can't turn it off."

I'm posting a thread in here for two reasons:
1) This is the only place I know of that won't try to inspire me, and will ridicule me shamelessly if I deserve it
2) I'm looking for atypical advice

I'm not going to give you a lengthy soliloquy about my current state of affairs because, all in all, things are not so bad. I've utterly failed in so many avenues of my life, but I'm eating well, I have a full time job, and I'm living with a woman who actually likes me. Things are pretty good, I should say.

But I still have this internal Live Journal MCR attitude about everything that keeps my head firmly planted in my rectum. Example: today I Wake up, go for walk, write a little, get some, read a book, have a smoothie, then while cruising web I happen across a personal site of a girl I haven't seen in over a year and haven't dated in almost 3 years, see pics of her wedding and I'm all like "omg cut myself and light candles, where's the smirnov ice...?"

THis is lame. How to fix?

I directed, produced, filmed, and editing several pieces of bizarre pornography, starring myself.

Is there any interest in the link?





No. I'm not kidding.

Ok, per request in the Afterbirth, I think we should start a discussion about the Invisibles...


....aaaaannnd:

Gravity's Rainbow.

If you've read one or both of them, please introduce topics of conversation as they strike you, and I will try to put up jpegs of the Invisibles or post sections of Pynchon's text when I get a chance.

Don't ask me why I merged such mammoth pieces into one thread. I don't know man, I didn't do it.

To begin, I feel there is a theme both are exploring when they discuss the "oppressive regimes" that are behind much of the conspiracy. The manner in which they see some comfort in that they are only giving the hurf-durfs exactly what they want by imposing their methods:

...look at the forms of capitalist expression. Pornographies: pornographies of love, erotic love, Christian love, boy-and-his-dog, pornographies of sunsets, pornographies of killing, and pornographies of deduction -- ahh that sigh when we guess the murderer -- all these novels, these films and songs they lull us with, they're approaches, more comfortable and less so, to that Absolute Comfort.
(page 155)

Thoughts...?

[SOON!]

Just finished Outliers...

It was chock full of "no shit, dude..."

Then I realized, Mr. Gladwell has derived an entire career from stating the obvious using borrowed philosophies and interesting anecdotes.

I can't tell if this makes him a genius, as he has used a very typical formula and still managed to be considered "quirky", or if this makes him just another academic yawn.

Please offer your riposte...


SOON!

Ok, so where is it?

What the hell happened to LSD? Why is nobody taking it anymore, and where did it go?

Could this be why US is  ?

http://www.senate.gov/legislative/LIS/roll_call_lists/roll_call_vote_cfm.cfm?congress=110&session=2&vote=00015

Yep. Big telecommunications companies have Dems in their pockets.

Ah... the death rattle of American Freedom©

A reading from the last Text Message from Saul to the Venetians...

Ze fwoops as they were: T'ree men out at sea.

And as they came aboard m'ship, ze fwoops led us out to ze t'ree seas. Ze Whore Sea, Vitamin Sea, and Luna Sea.

'Twas one thing to be-leave, but another to be a fwoop!