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And behold!  Eris came to me in the shower whilst I was touching myself and told me to write the Discordian Book of Juju that all mayst disregard it's non-message to humanity on the state of Magickkkkk.

Of course, this all happened a few months ago, and in proper style I'm not getting around to until now.  That intro sucked goat balls.

The TP ritual:

Sit down on a cold, hard bathroom floor.

Stand up, and go get a roll of toilet paper.

Sit back down on the cold, hard bathroom floor.

Stand up, and go get chopsticks.

Sit back down in the same spot.

Stand up, and go get a ballpoint pen (working or not, its up to you).

Take one peice of toilet paper and set it on the ground.

Take chopsticks in hand and pick up pen.

Without ripping the TP (if you rip it use another sheet, you may need many rolls) write the name of a person you hate on it.  Or anyone else for that matter.

After you've succeeded in writting the name on the toilet paper, wipe your ass.

Repeat as often as neccisary.

Who wants to help me write more?  Who thinks I'm an asshole?

1. I think you're an asshole. But it's okay, you're among friends.

2. Personally, I find it difficult to wipe my ass with a single sheet of TP- could I do a variation where I use several dozen sheets, then roll them up into a ball before the final step?

Kiu?

Word. I'm still working on getting the GCN version of VJ.

More to come...

Cool. Costumes.

Oh, and when I told my niece that the woman on my t-shirt was
Eris, the ancient Greek Goddess of Discord, she said that the
modern God of Discord would have to be Jerry Springer.

War on Horrorism! The Jihad is on!

Yeah, that recipe doesn't specify what to do when the squerrils fight back.  

That's because there is nothing to do.

There are three things in this world that do not merely entail death, but in essence are death: thoughtcrime, waking up Cthulhu, and pissing off Devil Squerrel.

What's the plural of aurochs?

poetry sucks, yatta yatta yatta

yatta yatta yatta has been repeatable seen, buying huge tomes
of poetry, invalidating his counterclaims.

Not necessarily- he might've been taking them to the incinerator.

Is Wayne Brady gonna hafta choke a bitch?

By the Gods, yes!

But only if the bitch is Clive Anderson.

Agreed. He actually thinks the points matter. Drew Carey was a far better host on that account.

now if only she could surpass it.

Next stop, Dr. Seuss!

I knew that Hotsuma secretly loved poetry. Yes, I did.

don't make me tell the IRS about your back taxes.

Is Wayne Brady gonna hafta choke a bitch?

Maybe not, but it's also not for direct posting on this forum - kids can wander in here, you know

Oh, for Goddess' sake... are we going to open up that discussion again? Look, you people have got to stop with the puritanical notion that "protecting" young people from nudity is helping them in any way, shape, or form. Boobs are just a part of the human body and a fact of nature, and the idea that there's a certain age one has to reach before becoming aware of them is retroactive bullshit.

(This is not to say that I agree with directly posting them on the fora- after all, some of us come here at work or school and the environs must be kept safe to that end. But not doing what comes naturally simply because you don't want your kids exposed to it isn't keeping their minds "clean"- it's just making them neurotic.)

[feel apart of something ancient, timeless and bigger than the both of usA lighting bolt of warmth, ripped through me and landed in the pit of my heart,I felt your thoughts graze my soul.I know I'm extremely venerable and the reality of this situation only makes it more appealingTrusting you is so raw, so new. And suddenly the world makes sense.Sp please understand that my bleeding heart is on my sleeve for you and everyone else to seeDon't bruise me, I was already raped once]

feel apart of something ancient, timeless and bigger than the both of us
A lighting bolt of warmth, ripped through me and landed in the pit of my heart,I felt your thoughts graze my soul.
I know I'm extremely venerable and the reality of this situation only makes it more appealing
Trusting you is so raw, so new. And suddenly the world makes sense.
Sp please understand that my bleeding heart is on my sleeve for you and everyone else to see
Don't bruise me, I was already raped once...........

still a crappy poem.

At least she's living up to her standard.

http://www.japander.com/japander/schwarz.htm

OMFG

I hate election year.... people make such a big deal out of the changing of the puppets...

Bella for President. Sooner or later, you'll agree.