Open Bar: Free Russian Orphans with Every Purchase

[Bruno]

impactfully

That should not be a word.

I feel the same way about the word "utilize". Anywhere you can utilize the word utilize, you could just use the word use.

[Bruno]

Well, just heard an exec say how having all the clients in a sector is bad.  Sigh.

But I thought all problems were just opportunities, and such.

Ha!

But see if you have all the clients, you can't grow, if you can't grow then obviously that sector is declining and must be ignored! No profit can be had from a declining sector!

Have they considered genetically engineering up some new clients? Seems like it could be pretty lucrative, and as far as I know no one is even doing it.

Need to make clients clients, and some landmass, but this idea has merit.

I got the idea from the book Oryx and Crake. They were genetically engineering a new breed of customers because the old ones (that's us) could no longer survive in Earth's environment.

[LMNO]

impactfully

That should not be a word.

I feel the same way about the word "utilize". Anywhere you can utilize the word utilize, you could just use the word use.

Roger, I came up with a new business term: "Fostering Engagement Towards Utilizing Our Goal-Setting Success."

[Cain]

Needs more synergy.

Oh, and Agile.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

I didn't read any of this thread, I was just clever elsewhere and wanted to share

[]
this is 169% in line with our stated values and mission, if anyone complains I volunteer to personally feed them a moldy cheese sandwich

[LMNO]

Needs more synergy.

Oh, and Agile.

Still a better model than Waterfall.













Fucking Waterfall.

[Doktor Howl]

Needs more synergy.

Oh, and Agile.

The use of "agile" in the workplace indicates that said workplace is as agile as Trump in a tutu.

[minuspace]

Den dems dat SCRUM 'ill be de lucky uns.

[Trivial]

Over use of the word agile will make me stab people.

I take calls and solve problems for fucks sake.  Agile doesn't apply. Get problem fix thing.  Damn company is filled with cargo cult managers.  Though not my manager, he'll provide knives and help hide bodies after a buzzword attack.


Oh in other news, we put our IT guy in an office with windows.  This is a good thing, but feels wrong somehow.

[Trivial]

About the Agile thing and my hatred of it, we moved from a TPS based model to an Agile model and were hounded about how they were different and we really needed to know how to handle it.

We did the same fucking thing only huddles were called standups.

Things got even more stupid when our team was down to two people.

[Doktor Howl]

Oh in other news, we put our IT guy in an office with windows.  This is a good thing, but feels wrong somehow.

It IS wrong.  And unhealthy for them.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Hey guys,

pre-dropping in. I'm not dropping back in just yet because it was a busy Friday. I'll for realz drop in tomorrow.

[Bruno]

Oh in other news, we put our IT guy in an office with windows.  This is a good thing, but feels wrong somehow.

They're screwing with the symmetry of the universe, here. God put his tech support guy in the basement for a reason.

Best not to fiddle with what works.

[ReverendJesus]

Oh in other news, we put our IT guy in an office with windows.  This is a good thing, but feels wrong somehow.

Why is he out of his room?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGAKuP6cHiA

[Trivial]

It's scary, he's got plants now.  They're alive.