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Where's the whipped cream? I always have whipped cream on my pie.

fluffy stole it, i think.

YES! LMNO IS BACK!

This place still sucks.

Yes, but now it sucks with style.


LMNO
-Sucks with style.
(when not ripping off TGRR's routines.)

Aw, shucks.

t'weren't nuthin.

I beat the spread!


LMNO
-putting Vegas oddsmakers out of business since two weeks ago.

Hey, I do act according to the principles I often hold.

I'm for self-transformation and gradual paradigm shifts, rather than direct, force-based revolution.



And Rome needed a good fire, anyway.  too much underbrush getting in the way of the tall trees.

I hear trumpets and swans at this point, in my mind.

fucking awesome.

Hey, thanks for that.

::groans::

,ÄúLook Stain, is this gonna take much longer?  I want to be at the Ocean while there,Äôs still some daylight left.,Äù  I realized that every time I mentioned the Ocean, Erin would tense up.  I need to do something about that, I thought.  ,ÄúHey, while you,Äôre down there,Ķ,Äù

The napkin holder sighed.  ,ÄúEvery time I go down here L,,Äù it said, ,Äúyou always seem to ,Äòremember,Äô something else you need.,Äù

,ÄúWell, that,Äôs because I,Äôm always thrown off by your stunningly good looks.,Äù

,ÄúFuck you.  What else do you need?,Äù

,ÄúSedatives.  But do you have any of those new ones that don,Äôt affect the frontal lobes, just the subconscious?,Äù

,ÄúYou want the Somax 2350?  Planning on performing surgery in the middle of a gunfight?,Äù

,ÄúI doubt it will come to that.  I just need to settle some nerves.,Äù

,ÄúWell, I don,Äôt have it here.  You,Äôre gonna have to make another stop, if you want that stuff.  Like, you,Äôll have to go to the Mountain.,Äù

,ÄúJesus Christ, Stain.,Äù

Erin broke in.  ,ÄúI,Äôve always wanted to go to the Mountain!,Äù

I cracked a wry grin, and bit my tongue against the inevitable Mohammed joke.  ,ÄúWell, if you want any sort of chance of staying coherent at the Ocean, we,Äôve gotta go.  I think the dense tree coverage, combined with all the pollution damage should somewhat approximate the psychotecture.  At least, it won,Äôt fuck your mind up as much.  But we,Äôll need something to take the edge of.  You know what that means, Stain,,Äù I said to the napkin holder.

It sighed.  ,ÄúI know.  I,Äôll throw in two bottles of tequila, but only because I like you.,Äù

Erin slowly smiled, as if she was beginning to catch on to how the dynamic went.  ,ÄúThanks so much, Mr. Stain,,Äù she said, adding a thick, sweet lilt to her voice.  ,ÄúI,Äôm not sure you,Äôll ever know how much this means to us,Äîto me.,Äù

,ÄúComing around to my side, are you?  You better drop that loser, toots, and get with the Man.  Oh, and it,Äôs Reverend Stain, not Mister.,Äù

,ÄúApologies,,Äù Erin said, giving me a slow wink.  ,ÄúI,Äôll tell you what.  When this is all over, I promise to come back here, and show you the proper appreciation for what you,Äôre doing for us.,Äù

,ÄúOh, yeah.  You , me, and my walk in cooler have a standing reservation.  Anytime, anytime.  I,Äôll be right up.,Äù

I gave Erin a surreptitious thumbs-up, and moments later, Stain emerged from the back, dragging some metal boxes.  He opened one up, pulled out a briefcase, and slid it across the table.  I clicked open the latches, and felt the cool air against my teeth as I sucked in my breath.

,ÄúWhoa.  This is impressive.,Äù  I found myself face-to-face with a Smith & Wesson neuro-disruptor, the latest in assault technology.  A glancing shot will send a large burst of energy through your neuro-somatic pathways, momentarily making all the neurons in your body send a signal simultaneously to the brain.  Apparently, it really fucks you up, like having electroshock therapy, but five times worse.  A direct hit will completely destroy your central nervous system.  ,ÄúWhere the hell did you get this?,Äù

,ÄúNot for you to ask, my friend.  Make sure you know what you,Äôre doing before you use that thing.  The rest of this is the scuba gear.  And this,,Äù he said, handing me a sealed envelope, ,Äúis for when you get to The Mountain.  Don,Äôt open it; it,Äôs sealed for a reason.,Äù

,ÄúHowabout some directions?,Äù

,ÄúOn the dash in your Brand New Car!,Äù  He tossed me a set of keys.  ,ÄúNow, let,Äôs get that Battle Jacket, what do you say?,Äù

We all got up, and walked out into the late morning sun of The City.  The Mountain, I thought.  I probably shouldn,Äôt tell her what happened last time I was there.

That's cool, there's no grading on this section of the exam...

Actually, I do have some problems with the structure myself, but I have to go get drunk soon, so i don't really have time to get into it right now.  Perhaps on Monday.

Perhaps.

Oh.


Well, then.








::giggles at the Universal Joke anyway::

No, it's not.

It's the only Truth that shall be known.



LMNO
-knows these things.

Oh, you dropped the ball.

The 8th circuit of humor must be the realization that all of creation and existence is a joke, that everything is funny.




See the way buddah smiles?  That's the 8th circuit of humor.

Fuck this.

I have fucking had it with all the bitching whining and moaning on this goddamn board.  What started out as a fun way to pass the day has become a tedious and uncomfortable experience.

So I decided. ,ÄúIf I can choose my own reality, why the hell should I stick around this place, where the sheer amount of negativity is enough to choke a horse?,Äù

So, that,Äôs it.  I,Äôve got better things to do.  To you, Eris might be strife, and pain, and sarcasm, and humiliation, but to me, she,Äôs simply the unexpected, and you better get ready to deal with whatever she throws at you next.  

I just don,Äôt want to deal with slogging throw meaningless arguments that do nothing to forward personal growth, but are just petty circuit 2 domination/submission games disguised as circuit 3 debates.  You guys are merely flinging shit.  It would be much more honest if you admitted it was all about whose ego needs to get stroked more.

I,Äôve made my point clearly about how I feel regarding the fluff posters, so don,Äôt think this is about you.  Your positive optimism helps keep me afloat in this Grey job I wade through.

As for you other assholes, I,Äôm done.  See ya.  And no, I,Äôm not finishing LMNO-PI.  What,Äôs the point?



Much love to those that deserve it,
LMNO


::grabs razor, slits wrists up, not across::




BOARD SUICIDE!

Oh com on, admit it... You stay up late at night reading all the gay Harry Potter slash fic on Live Journal...

We're all friends here, you can let it out, it's ok...