That line from the father's song in Mary Poppins, where he's going on about how nothing can go wrong, in Britain in 1910.  That's about the point I realized the boy was gonna die in a trench.

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Bolsanoro commemorative edition
Aneristic Illusions / Hey Cain, it's a Pakistan thread
August 05, 2018, 12:40:34 PM
Because it seems like it's going to be needed. What'the fuck is going on with the military and Imran Khan? The whole situation seems utterly bizzare and seems to be establishing a worrying trend of celebrity leaders.
Think for Yourself, Schmuck! / Talking to Nigel
February 25, 2017, 01:06:08 AM
I met Nigel, returning from a day spent hard slicing the brains of small reptiles. Or as I like to call them "The spawn of Roger". Our collective mood was both elated and distraught thanks to range of personal events and our remarks on our joys and woes was recorded by a passing NSA agent. Thanks to a FOI request that I have on standing order I can CTRL+C/V the text directly for your enlightenment.

N: I guess one of the main stressors now is my Father's developing Altzihmers. It's just kind of shitty that medical research doesn't get a considerable degree of funding compared to the shitloads that always seem to get spent on self destructive or useless shit, you know? We could be curing so many more things by now it's unreal.

J:I console myself by thinking that in a few hundred years whats left of humanity will mock this era mercilessly for spending so much time, money and effort on say, sports or landmines,meth and beer and never combines them, compared to dealing with, for one thing, diseases. 21C - Advanced enough to know better, still too dumb to bother. It just keeps on showing how far we haven't come as a species. 

N:No shit! We are fucking IDIOTS. One of the most infuriating  things is that there is some evidence that Alzheimers may have a root that is strongly influenced by human behavior, but we don't know what it is. Because humans are pretty much barely above dog-level intelligence, it is hard to get funding to study anthropogenic roots of disease.

J: Dog level seems generous. A lot of people I encounter wouldn't rate above a fucking goldfish. Hells, we all know a couple of people who would lose a battle of wits against your average carp. And the depressing thing is that we've not even got that far to realise it about ourselves thanks to dunning-kruger.

I've said for a while that if 10% (FFS, even 1%) of football transfer fees or Hollywood film budgets, you know, leaving the sacred military alone, was mandatory to be put to medical research/care, the average life expectancy would probably be past 100 by now. And that's just looking at the past 30 odd years. But let's not do anything too crazy because socialism. Let's develop a system where our left wing politics is practically indistinguishable from our right wing stances. Instead we let this shit continue because big explosions and paying morons millions to kick a ball is apparently a better use of resources.

N:Goldfish do at least have rudimentary problem-solving skills. And you have in fact been outsmarted by one at some point, at least by it's own standard so it fucking wins, doesn't it?
J:Fair enough, if that's the standard you're stetting.

Unfortunately, Dog problem-solving and reasoning can be estimated to range from about 60-85 on an IQ scale, taking into consideration that dogs have almost none of the cortex that predicts future outcomes and so can't plan ahead at all. IQ is based on a normal distribution with a human average of 100, the distribution mean. Below 85 is considered cognitively impaired, above 115 is considered intellectually gifted. These are facts. That's one standard deviation in each direction. 

J:I think I need a drink.

That means, that Roughly 78% of people are within one standard deviation from the mean. That's what we're dealing with. Not to sound like an elitist prick, which is an easy hole to fall into when discussing reasoning skills, but the general lack of intellectual reasoning ability in the majority of the population means that we will probably never, ever get even the small fraction of funding for science that could significantly improve the lives and health of everyone, because sportsball and bombs is what's best for fun and profit.


Nigel, test run, bit rough, considered going into zimbardo for further counterpoint? feel free to add/alter anything you see fit. I've thrown in bits here and there so turnabout fair play etc.
So I've been spending some spare time with Dave lately. Dave loves to tell really edgy jokes about rape and is generally a sexist piece of shit. But he's OK if you're just talking about music or the weather.

Steve sometimes joins us. Steve loves music, particularly Skrewdiver and Burzum. He's got some strange ideas about racial purity but the banter between him, Dave and Jamal is top notch.

Jamal is hilarious, by the way. Really liberal and progressive. He does think that Malcom X was a filthy moderate and that the Black Panthers should have put much more effort into "killing Whitey" but apart from that he's pretty cool.

Here's the thing folks, the people you choose to associate with, the people you CHOOSE to spend your free time with say a lot about YOU. If you spend all your spare time with idiots, don't be surprised when other people assume you're a fucking idiot as well. The company you keep says a lot about you to an outside observer. These observers can be your other friends, family and occasionally authority figures like, for instance, the police. If you're not happy about that, then you need to spend less time with people who you know have problematic viewpoints.

Don't try that "I'm trying to change the group from within" shite either. Because you can't point at an instance where this has ever worked, let alone a time when you successfully did it. Don't pull the "I'm going to expose this horrible group from within" crap either. You're not a professional agent provocateur or credible investigative journalist so what you will be doing instead is enabling a shitty group of people to carry on being shitty in their own particular way. Oh, wait, they're just "friends you've had for a really long time"? Well, fuck you and fuck your friends. Being acquainted with dickheads for a long time doesn't give you some kind of free pass. In fact, it makes me think you're just a damn clown for associating with these people for that long.

You have a very finite amount of time in the world, call it 90 years at best. You are very unlikely to even get that long. Do you really want to spend more than a second than is necessary with shitty people?

If you do, guess what? You're a shitty person.
After watching countless peers fuck up being a parent, I am now being given more useless unsolicited advice than I can shake a shitty cloth at. So I thought, "there's a few people I know that actually have half a fucking clue at how not to be a utterly useless twat of a parent." Hells, some of you even seem quite competent.

Offhand, I know a few of you have spawned and from your posts, I'd actually be interested in hearing any and all advice from. I won't name names for privacys sake, but if you think this may mean you, it probably does. I suspect many things may not be being done in a dull fashion. I'd be disappointed if they were. I guess there's probably a bit to discuss in regards to second/third generation Discordia in general, if it even survives that far. If we're even still bothering to use the term anymore.

I suppose this will also include likely plans which may and may not get met. I think there may be a bit of mileage in the various things you all intend to pass on in some degree or another too. I'm going to be damn sure mine questions every damn thing it's told for example. They'll probably have a bit of a mouth on them too if my general parlance is anything to fucking go by. They shall also have an acute understanding of the strange times, which by the time I explain it, shall no doubt be even stranger.

It's also worth noting that this voice to text thing is picking up pretty much everything now. This is just one of countless technologies and advancements that didn't even exist when I was born. They're living in the future and they'll be grateful for it too.
Aneristic Illusions / SGITR 2 - Uniformed Idiot boogaloo
November 27, 2016, 10:35:49 PM
I was randomly flicking through youtube and got this, Sam Harris on Black Lives matter.

Spoiler, there's an incredible degree of ignorance and bias. It's a fine example of someone widely regarded as "smart" being a Dawkins level of asshole. It's an odd variation of SGITR, I think. Something like because people have assigned them a status as "smart" or "able to argue passably well" becomes a de-facto authority on things that they're wildly uniformed of.

It looks to me like we're shifting into a strange time when experts in their respective fields are trusted far less than before. Rather than discuss the matter with related experts, there's a tendency to grab the nearest sack of skin that others have deemed "smart" and treat them like an oracle.

For instance, Farage. A "man" who's factual statements on Europe I wouldn't trust and this is arguably his field of expertise. Yet with a quick google I can learn his opinion all sorts of things about the world which are demonstrably false. The important point to note here is that someone has bothered to spend the time asking the questions and making the answers available.

There's trump, and little needs to be said here. In the past 18 months he's been asked nearly everything you can imagine and been found wanting in the extreme. But somehow, he's now the ultimate SGITR. A man that couldn't even understand basic questions about US nuclear arms is soon to be in charge of them.

Little too, needs to be said of Harris. Very smart in a very limited capacity but fond of making idiot statements on a whole range of things. It's not a bad thing to not know something or perhaps need a concept explained to you. Yet when was the last time you remember anyone asking for clarification of a topic or term in an interview? The Allepo guy? Notice now infrequent it is? He was rightly crucified for it but it's the only off-hand example I can think of where the urge to be seen as all-knowing just wasn't there.

It seems like a lot of people have all the answers nowadays and not one of those answers is "Fucked if I know." This is also the only answer that should be given to 99% of the questions these people are asked.

Anyway, we're going to see a lot more people saying a lot more stupid things in the foreseeable future. If you need to boost your blood pressure, this will probably be an easy place to do it.
Aneristic Illusions / Offical betting thread
November 15, 2016, 02:17:10 AM
Giving you the best odds around with Payouts SO YUGE you look at my hands and say "These payouts are huge, and the odds, the odds are overwhelming" The Officially Stamped Betting Cabal is taking bets large and small on any and all forthcoming bullshit.

Think Alex Jones might be trump's press secretary? Hey, the breitbart guy is in so I'd throw a piranha on it.

Shkreli for the new FBI head? Two monkeys, just for fun. A banana for getting something.

Guessing the next front opens in Africa and not the middle east? Surely worth two donkeys and a chisel.

Palin for state secretary? No? Supreme court judge material you say? Then quit after two weeks? Well, throw a wheelbarrow on it and let's see.

You see, dear friends, that we are firmly in the grip of the strange times. And we shall fight this, like we fight everything else (often each-other), but that is just one part of it all. The other, the much more important, is to LAUGH at it all. You know i'm not always talking about that happy or healthy laugh either. But laugh we must, and what better laughter comes than from a horrible notion plucked from the air AND THEN LAND A PAYOUT THAT YOU WOULD NEVER OF CONCEIVED OF. OH GODS I PROMISE YOU, SHOULD YOU WIN YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE THE PAYOUT THAT SHALL BE INFLICTED GRIEVOUSLY UPON THEE GENEROUSLY REWARDED BEYOND REASON. Really, you just won't believe it. If you're struggling to start, look at that picture of trump/farage in front of the GOLD(bronze) door and repeat the holy mantra:

"This represents the underprivileged white underclass". Enlightenment and the urge to gamble shall follow.

So step right up, prove your prophecy skills, predict comical nominations, resignations, quiet marginalisations, outright failures and WHATEVER THE FUCK ELSE comes to mind. We're covering all bets until bankruptcy, going hoarse, or it just stops being funny.

And remember before you bet, I've just had a daughter literally today. The last few months have fucking crept by, the weeks moreso, and now, I have a kid. A tiny ball of innocence that I shall be dragging through this era and having to explain so much bullshit as it already stands, I can barely conceive of it. If you saw that ever happening you're a better fucking man than I. 

Well then, Taking all bets.

On lengthy consideration of your situation, both personally and nationwide, I have an idea that may be beneficial to you.

Firstly, let us establish some key facts.

Fact #1 - You deal with management that is ineffective, incompetent and unlikely to be missed in a significant regard.

Fact #2 - The mountain is doing very important work.

Fact #3 - A mountain is a pretty easy position to defend.

Fact #4 - The equipment atop said mountain is valuable.

Fact #5 - Walmarts and such are everywhere and provide huge quantities of goods, both edible and practical.

Fact #6 - The potable water problem is moving to being resolved.

Fact #7 - There is only one non suicidal path up/down the mountain.

When considering these facts and the general way your country is going, a solution seems quite obvious.

I propose that you consider taking a leaf from Cliven Bundy's book and militia up. Quietly. Feed upper management to nearby bears, dedicate a person from middle/lower management to be responsible for maintaining their communications to the outside world.

Done right, you could probably stockpile enough food and sundries to last for a few years. With a few relatively simple preparations the mountain could be turned into something close to a bond villan's hideout. If you're not inclined to feed the bears then the management could be set to tunnelling duties for a handy escape route. If you're suitably low-key about enough of this, you could probably last 6 months before anyone even realises there's been a coup.

Even if you're discovered sooner than this, just follow the Bundy playbook of being insanely fucking unreasonable and you might just be allowed to get away with it. In the meantime, you've got time to SCIENCE to your hearts content. Even when you are discovered, you have the perfect platform to espouse whatever you feel like to a national audience. The more crazy you go with that, the more supporters you'll attract.

This is far from a complete plan, but the bones are there and it's got to be worth considering. When your county is turning to shit, surely the best approach is to sidestep it and just get on with the crap that actually matters anyway.

I look forward to your response and eventual takeover of Mt. Roger.
Aneristic Illusions / New york incident
September 19, 2016, 02:36:21 PM
Not very up on this yet, but I'm sure a thread will be justified.
I find cause to examine the current monkey motivations for a range of things. As an impartial watcher of mankind for your race, I suspect you may have valuable insights.

A long time ago, a horrible sales bastard taught me that the main motivations to any decision being made are:


In pretty much that order. If you can suss why a decision is being made in the first place, you can just keep shouting about that particular thing and get your way.

I hated that man with an extreme passion, mainly because he seems to even still be right. We've got some smarter monkeys emerging, sure, but they're still wired to fuck themselves or each other over. If this isn't on a biological level, it's at the least built into the framework of society.

Take the example in the open bar thread. Reasonable explanations were Hucksterism or idiocy. The educational background killed that, so you're left with a smart monkey acting out the top motivation. Greed, for our purposes here covers self interest in the simplest forms. If there's a quick buck or benefit, greed.

Next most common, you have Ignorance. I had a recent client that paid in excess of £400 for a free piece of software from their trusted outsourced IT. They didn't need it and it's barely worthwhile for what it is for anyway. But it's a nice logo and easy sell. I'm sure I've told you all about the guy who leased a fax machine for £30/month. This decade.

Next up are the OUTRAGED at THINGS. The cause is all that matters and whether that cause will actually help or hurt them they've made their decision and they're not changing it. Not for anything like evidence and self righteousness kicks in if you offer incentives for changing their minds.

Now into terrible minorities here, around 10% (or less) are actually making decisions based on what the problem is what what will likely solve it. These people call you and have already sold themselves. When this occurs in a non business sense, you can get anything from reasonable people to those with more extreme solutions. This is unfortunate as I mentioned these people are practical so the chance of actual harm escalates wildly.

Then finally, the lovestruck. Another minority overall (Under 5% was the pitched number). These are as often in love with themselves as much as others and make decisions based around how they will appear to the object of their affections. Affectation is all with these buggers and logic doesn't really feature.

I never discussed Woo with arsehole that told me about this. This leads to the question of how much Woo is currently just greed compared to ignorance. And further questions about if the main motivation still driving the world is in fact greed. Ignorance seems to be climbing at an alarming rate.
Aneristic Illusions / Dallas Police shootings
July 08, 2016, 09:59:57 AM
Not sure where this goes under yet:

QuoteFive Dallas police officers have been killed and six wounded by gunmen during protests against the shooting of black men by police, authorities say.
Three people are in custody and one man who was in a stand-off with police shot himself dead, US media have reported.
Gunfire broke out at around 20:45 local time on Thursday (01:45 GMT Friday) as demonstrators marched through the city.
The protests were sparked by the deaths of Philando Castile in Minnesota and Alton Sterling in Louisiana.
The Dallas attack marks the deadliest toll on US law enforcement officers since the 9/11 attacks in 2001.

QuoteChief Brown said the suspects were all believed to have been working together, using rifles to carry out attacks while the rally was taking place.
He added: "We do not have a comfort level that we have all the suspects."

This seems unlikely to end well, in any regard.
Aneristic Illusions / Chilcott Unlimited thread
July 05, 2016, 08:56:49 PM
If it actually does come out tomorrow, it should be worth a look and laugh at.

Will be interesting to see where blame is actually directed, if anywhere. It's some 12 volumes of crap deep at this stage and overdue by about 7 years.
Aneristic Illusions / The Dollop - The Thread
September 22, 2014, 07:19:34 AM
I've been listening to this for a while and it seems well worth a thread to keep a track of them.

In short, comedy podcast, mainly looking at historical US fuck-ups. Events, people, places, it's pretty varied.

Why? Well, this week you've got the first biological terror attack in the US by a cult, through the use of diarrhoea. Who done it? Well technically the Guru, you may recall the guy who wanted to get into the Guinness book of records for having the most Rolls Royces? No? Then you need to listen to this shit. 

"Where did all this idiocy occur?"", you may wonder. Where else, but Portland?
Think for Yourself, Schmuck! / Laws
August 12, 2014, 07:31:27 PM
As technology progresses, I've been increasingly thinking about Laws and the justice system.

To start with, it's an odd word to use; Law. It would imply, that like say Gravity, it would apply and be enforced all the time. Without fail or favour. It seems to me that we are increasingly reaching a point where it would in fact be trivial to do this.

Think about it. Everything on-line is monitored by a variety of folk. You're on CCTV from the moment you leave indoors. Staying inside is an option but the phones are tapped and they can just switch on your mobile's microphone whenever they feel bored. Hell, they can go old school and just stick remote surveillance on your place and watch the windows to know exactly what you're actually saying. Sound reconstruction is crazily advanced now. Or go quite modern and just shine a laser at your place to know what you own that you shouldn't. This is all assuming they don't want to get handsy and come a-knocking.

Now, that might sound slightly paranoid, with the "they" and the remarkably intrusive shit for no reason. And yet it happens. Constantly. Daily. Increasingly frequently.

So, Laws. As before, I would understand a Law to be something that would be enforced constantly. And it seems so easy to do so given that half of the above is done to you already whether you like it or not. For your own safety, of course.

Upon then pondering the myriad of Laws that I am apparently bound to obey, the natural conclusion would seem to be that I am a horrendous criminal, as well as likely everyone else I know. Take a simple motorway journey. Sit in the slow lane at 80. You'll be being overtaken by around 70% of traffic. Anywhere. Minimum. A GPS system to monitor this is a pittance. If even the simplest of traffic laws were enforced with 100% efficiency, then there would be stunning numbers of banned drivers overnight. You literally wouldn't be able to build the required jails and such quickly to deal with it.

This leads me to thinking that we may need to look at some of the crimes we punish and how we punish them. Honestly, consider what your potential fine or jail term is just from what you've done today. If you honestly think it's nothing then the chances are you're not familiar with all of the laws that apply to you. You certainly aren't skilled at thinking like a servant of the Law.

Which leads to enforcement. The classic scene of a dossier filled with pictures slapped in front of the guilty. You're very, very guilty. Of what? Well, what would you like to talk about? By default, you're having this conversation with someone who has access to at least the crudest methods of surveillance, and if so inclined likely others. This is an easy reality for anyone who wants to bother. Most of the time they won't need to as you're already spilling your guts. Do you think confessions and testimonies against others increase or decrease in a recession? Check it out, I wonder why those numbers are like that.

There are, surely, some Laws that universal enforcement would be laudable. Crimes against beings and to a relevant extent property should probably prevented and deterred. Just saying there's obviously some lines that most would like to draw.

To me, the current various justice systems seem to be lacking incredibly behind what current technology could potentially enforce. You would need to take an immediate look at every single law and consider the what 100% enforcement would do and if if such a thing is wise.

And then I think, I am a horrible old man. Surely brighter, younger minds have considered the shape of the society they are perpetuating into the future.

I look at the politicians and I wonder.

I look at the police and I wonder.

I look at the press and I wonder.

I wonder when they will all stop being so fucking stupid and help people.

I've been considering my personal biases and boycotts list of late. You'll be shocked to know that I have more than a few. I'm sure I'm not alone in having a fairly extensive list of companies and such that I try to avoid handing any kind of money or information to. I'm fairly sure that we all despise different corporations and products to varying degrees.

So, with that in mind, I'm somewhat curious as to who/what you good people try to avoid. Here's (some of) mine:

Facebook - If you need explanation on this one, you really haven't been paying attention. I've avoided it thus far as well as most other forms of social media.

Coca-Cola - From the sponsoring of the Nazi Olympics to deplete wells in third world nations to killing Union reps where it can get away with it, few brands match it in how shitty a corporation can really be.

Any Bottled water sold by anyone anywhere - Paying over a quid for something that falls out of tap for essentially free is madness. I've broken this when in countries where drinking the tap water was verboten but with considerable resentment. Also, various environmental issues and scams abound.

Obviously many, many more as well, but I'm more interested in yours.
Greetings gentle readers,

Today, Horrible Uncle Junkie officially opens his heart to all poor souls needing a little HORRIBLE WISDOM in their lives. I'm sure other fine Doktors will assist operations as required.

First up, Little Billy Raztech (19) asked:
QuoteI'm surrounded by redskins fans right now.  Productivity has almost entirely been replaced by bitching.  And they still won't turn down the fucking smooth jazz. How do I improve my situation?

Well firstly, like all advice columns, here's a sentence or two of padding and bullshit. This is apparently mandatory and people who get paid for this charge by the word. Let's call it setting precedence because I'm obviously pre-famous now. Yeah, that's how it works.

Secondly, I'm going to re-phrase your statement to make forthcoming actions much more palatable to deal with. "Organised sports fans won't SHUT UP and DO SHIT. And the music is bad."

This is obviously intolerable.

The start of the problem, is that you don't give a huge fuck about X. This is kind of your problem. To all of them, you are now THAT GUY. They've got a collective emotion which you don't give a fuck about. There's also enough of them who aren't paid enough to give a fuck to keep doing their job.

The first option is simple - Slack off yourself, zone out and be in the conversation in body only. Simple meditation techniques are useful here. A nice one for beginners is "pick a film you know really well and watch it in your head". Everyone's got a film they've seen that much, or swap in a album if you're so inclined. If there isn't one already in your head, watch the same film 4-5 times in a row, in a day. Pick something good. I've got Return of the Jedi and regret it now. With the odd grunt and general mumbling with the group feeling, this is an easy low level out.

Step up, would be earplugs if at all possible. Move away and crack on solo as far as possible.

Don't want to slack by yourself or in a group? Actually need to get shit done? Well shit. First thing is that music. If you can't seize control or demand equal/equitable time with your own tastes - IT GOES. Safety first is a good one, "does this place have a broadcasting consent (Check your own laws and lingo - most workplaces need some form of license to play music/radio/TV.) Guess how many places have one.

Both of those no good? Shit. You could try company policies and procedures, or you could just sabotage some shit. You would be AMAZED at how long it can take some places to fix a cut wire. Work late one day and scope it out on the QT. Leave it at least 3-4 days after the recon, longer if possible, shorter is sloppy, especially if you've already made a stink. Don't get smart and think about evidence, just ensure no CCTV and eventually a rat will get blamed. It's obviously better to go for as close to the speaker as possible, and the speaker in an ideal world. If you can get free reign, your best case is


Expanding foam, motherfucker. A tin isn't very expensive and they'll spend a good while thinking they can fix the speaker before realizing it's FUBAR. Any of those should buy you a couple of days of blessed silence. It's also value for money as one tin can cover quite a few speakers. I recommend a 20 second spray/stop pretty much regardless of brand. As soon as you can see foam, you're golden.

So, it's quiet but those fuckwits are still going on about local sports team?

Well, you have options, but they change drastically on your relative position to them.

Assuming you are senior, and need them to do things, you must TELL THEM WHAT. Loudly. State consequences for the next most senior person. You are already that guy to them in this situation, so revel as you become an immediate outlet for their ire and continue to TELL THEM WHAT.

Assuming equal or junior, TELL THEM WHAT. State that consequences are going to befall THEM not YOU.

Other options include, but are not limited to:

- Full on THAT GUY. Embrace your role as that guy and talk as loudly as possible at all costs about something that interests only you. If anyone shares or picks up on that conversation, you need to be more hipster than thou. Not the film, not the special edition of the film, not the 1997 recut of the film, you're talking about main actor edited recut of the pre-screened 1996 version that was shot in sepia on a handheld camera film. Bore the piss out of them with it. Directly ignore conversation not related to it and ask questions only about it. When this gets questioned state that they are boring the piss out of you so it seemed only reasonable to do it back.

-Self entertainment - Human siren. Any conversation about Local sports team will have the same fucking words, phrases and expressions used over and over and over and over until you get the red fading in a little. Pick a couple of these and choose some noises. A cough, hum, short whistle are good. Whenever what you picked comes up, subtly make the noise. Examine the group. See if any are prone to mimicking mannerisms. I bet at least 1 is in any group of 5+. Now, what did we learn from Uncle Pavlov? It is possible to have 6 people in a group of 10 making a humming sound after a players name before one questions why the fuck that's going on. I suspect higher numbers are possible with a bigger group.

The possibility or realities of actual consequences are remote? Well, fuck man, don't you have a phone or something? It's the future and you're moaning about shitty workmates? You seem to have EMPLOYMENT and INTERNET ACCESS in a WESTERN NATION. Compared to many you're doing pretty damn peachy. And hey, if it always gets too much, you can just punch the most irritating bastard in the mouth and quit. Sometimes, that's the best damn thing to do. 

Techmology and Scientism / Inventors thread
June 11, 2014, 09:39:06 AM
A conversation earlier reminded me about Troy Hubertise.

You may recall him as the guy who tried (and to an extent, succeeded) to build a bear-proof suit. Like many other inventors, there seems to be a healthy dose of crackpot about the guy, but some of his work appears to have serious potential. Firepaste, in particular would surely make anyone quite wealthy so why he hasn't pushed further development there is anyone's guess. I'm betting a key component was asbestos.

Angel Light was another thing he came out with and what that is apparently capable of over the years has changed dramatically from curing cancer to ultimate sci-fi X ray machine.

Crazy person? Likely. That said, i'd be interested to see some of his inventions tested independently. I'll add other similar folk as I remember them, feel free to join in.
We all have various ideas about what THE FUTURE will bring, both good and bad.

What I don't really have is an objective way to measure the incoming rate of future beyond "oh shit it's happened". To this end, I propose some kind of psuedo wisdom of crowds bullshit to attempt to measure the approximate rate of incoming future. I would suggest this can probably be done somewhat simply by using shit you encounter/use on a day to day basis. Consider the following and have a stab at what YOU would think to be likely in 5/10/25 year terms. Don't worry overmuch about how accurate your actual guess is, as through the magical bullshit of wisdom of crowds your answer will be averaged into the actual truth because the some people can pretend the world works that way. Seriously.

Internet - Main browsing device (Currently PC/Laptop/Phone) 5-Phone/smartbook 10-phone/wearable always on tech 25-wearable, always on tech exclusively.

Mass Transport (currently car) 5 - car 10- electric car 25 - electric car, moving towards connected high speed rail

Currency (Currently cash, digital overtaking) 5 - Little cash, Largely digital 10 - Cash relatively rare, digital payment the norm 25 - Cash worth small sums gone, non digital, traceable, "accountable" transactions viewed with suspicion.

And so on. Expand it to other areas as you please, this is more a starting point.

Fantastic. I'm not entirely sure if that's for the right reasons or wrong reasons though. This is the future I've been telling you all about.
New holy name time right? This one lost it's luster long ago and it's kinda melted because of all the fire.
Aneristic Illusions / PUAHate shooting incident
May 29, 2014, 11:33:38 AM
For those who missed the latest mass spree killing in the USA, there's some FUCKED UP going on with it.

Beyond the usual things of possible mental illness and gun control, this one is pretty notable due to the levels of outright blatant and highly worrying misogyny.

Quote from: Junkenstein on May 28, 2014, 02:58:22 PM
Pretty sure P3nt's familiar with the Onion.

This is a bag of creepy shit, somewhat related. Turns out the shooter was part of a "PUAhate" forum, trolled bodybuilders and much, much more.

Warning - Nothing specific, its all fucking awful.
Quote from: All-Father Nigel on May 28, 2014, 03:04:50 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on May 28, 2014, 03:02:09 PM
The worst part of that for me is that "PUAHate" isn't a bunch of people who hate PUAs because of their slimy, creepy, rape-y, objectifying ways, they hate PUAs because they feel "ripped off" the PUA techniques couldn't get them the sex they DESERVED.

I can't wait until PUAs and MRAs are classified as "hate groups".

This whole PUAhate thing is actually quite incredible. You've got some Incel (Involuntarily celibate) folk who have clearly in some cases paid substantial sums to PUA's, failed and decided they've not got a chance because that guys has (insert long description in what appears to be pseudo medical terms to describe face/physique.)

I can't stress how fucked up I find all of this. At this point the only possible positive I can see is the start of a decent backlash against PUA and it's associated areas. I'm literally waiting for the first big PUA to come out and say that PUA is OK, it's PUAhate that's where all the problems are. One of them is going to be stupid enough, mainly because of the size of their egos not allowing them to not be dumb in this regard.

I've ended up in a couple of arguments about whether this chap was actually mentally ill or not. Given the youtube video I'm strongly leaning towards a yes, for something like a severe narcissistic disorder of some kind at the least. As best as I can tell there's 3 main issues at play here and I can't quite determine which is the biggest factor. I suspect there's a very strong link between the mental health, gun control and PUAhate issues that have ended up in a very fucked up negative feedback loop.
Apparently some kind of Coup d'etat is ongoing as we speak. I've caught a couple of tales but this is mainly a placeholder for the moment to remind myself to look at it more.
Or Kill Me / TBD
May 22, 2014, 05:52:38 PM
I'm on about a week of minimal sleep, so it may be best to move along quietly now.

I can't remember the last time I saw my own face in a mirror. For some years now, the reflection has been replaced by my Grandfather. I guess it started when I fucked my leg, foot and hand up in unrelated incidents. For a time, this gave me a limp and clawed hand that initially amused me by their remarkable similarities. We've always been somewhat alike so naturally, it gave me a laugh. Since this, I can't help notice the increasing change into someone else.

It does things to you, having your face stolen and replaced with an older version from a different person. I'm not entirely certain if they're good or bad things. Certainly things. Their opinions and stances come to mind easier. You start finishing lines of thought with "...and they would think that...". This is fine when you're in a general accord but becomes a like aggravating when it's a point of contention. When you're arguing with yourself every time you catch your own reflection, that's when it becomes tedious.

It could be much worse, I suppose. I could have had a genetic disposition to look like a famous murderer or dictator rather than a man who I hold in high regard. That would make the arguments much worse I suppose. Certainly more frequent.

This probably won't happen to you until you're lucky enough to have some substantial aging inflicted upon you or a similar bout of whatever madness I'm having.

What's the point of this raving, beyond disclosing some kind of mental problem? Well, a warning to start with. How often do you consider you likely appearance in 6 months, let alone a number of years? There's probably a damn good chance you'll look like an elderly family member at some point. If it's likely to be one you know and like, you've lucked out big time. Sorry if this isn't the case in either event for you, but this will probably not hit you as much, if at all, so consider that good or bad as you see fit.

I suppose another part would be considering the concept of "me". I'm still "me" but to many, and frequently to my own eyes, I'm not. It's surprised me how easily my Grandfathers mannerisms come to me and I'm relatively certain some are reflexive now and I'm not sure why that is. I guess when you constantly see yourself as someone else, it's easily done. My mockery of things tends to focus on whatever I see so I would imagine this somehow extends into this. Seeing someone else's face at the start of most days sets the mind to the me/not me idea straight away and the dissonance flows from there.

Why are you reading this? It's sleep deprived lunacy. Give me my face back. 

OR KILL ME.     
Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / Historical TV
February 18, 2014, 10:23:24 AM
I've had the idea in my head for a while that TV shows could potentially tell us quite a bit about attitudes and common understandings in a culture and how the culture may be changed or influenced by such.

There's a slight problem in that I don't watch much TV so decently representative list is not likely to appear from just me. What I will do, is have a look at a few series and try and highlight what I think to be key to the topic. I'll mainly try and stick around privilege based areas such as depictions of race and mental health.

Many of these shows are now considered "Classic comedy" which means it's OK to laugh at it. Which would imply to me that the culture/society condones the depicted behaviours. Yes, there's a few assumptions here but that's why you people exist.

Shows I intend to cover so far(open to further suggestions or join in and what areas I'll try and look at in a bit more detail

MASH - Gender and Mental illness depictions
Rising Damp - Race. Obviously.
A touch of Frost - Various
2 and a half men (I watched an episode. I think I got everything I needed) - Duh.

There's been many claims of late that you can't judge previous eras based on modern attitudes. If we accept that, then we can certainly judge modern shows by modern attitudes and the charlie sheen shit does not really hold up well. I've not really much more of an idea about where this will end up yet, so lets start with Rising Damp.

The key focus of the show in many cases was the sole black cast member Philip played by Don Warrington. Philip was pretty much the main part of the show here. Suave and educated in marked contrast to every other cast member, in many ways is quite laudable. Any racism or idiocy from rigs by was usually countered with irony or sarcasm until the point was made. Credit is due for that to some degree, and indeed for even having a non-white guy be a main cast member in an era where it was still pretty rare to see.

That said, a re-watch now is pretty stunning. What could easily today be classed as racial abuse occurs regularly and while laughed off or mocked, is clearly as much of the joke as the rebuttal. Does this imply that Rising Damp helped normalise racism? I'd say not, more that racism was by this point pretty normal and institutional so it was seen as easy laughs. "Comedians" such as Bernard Manning took this kind of act to the wall and filling fairly substantial venues with "jokes" that tended to use "nigger" as the setup and punchline. Other shows like "Love thy Neighbour" were about and the idea of "not racist - only joking" can be seen to get into more common use.

Philip was used extensively as an exotic object of affection for the spinster character of Ms Jones. That was quite progressive for the time even if it was mainly played for laughs. I'm trying to recall offhand when mixed race relationships became normal to society (I suppose they still aren't in some) but I'm damn sure it was still something of a hot topic around the time of broadcast. 

While Rigsby never "won" any of his battles, he didn't exactly lose the war. He was a landlord with constant full occupancy who let others live in bad conditions and felt no obligation to fix or improve anything. While you could say that's the attitude of most landlords it's an mindset that ill serves both parties. Since broadcasting, slumlords have risen in practically every major town and city making money from the least affluent. While I can't hold this show accountable for this, it again helped normalise the behaviour. People now expect landlords to be terrible and tenants ungrateful. At least now Landlords have to give 24 hours notice before barging in and racial abuse is frowned upon.

So let's consider what this show could look like now. Rigsby would be inundated with repair bills and legal problems. Rather than a sole black tenant he'd have people from all over Europe who are obviously taking his job. Ms Jones would be a 20-something dreamer. Alan would be far more intelligent and Philip would probably really be an African (Or Arabian to keep with the times) prince. Many, if not all, old behaviours shown are now pretty unacceptable. Overall, I'd call that progress.

It's increasingly clear to me that I have no idea where this is going so I'll just type and if anyone can drag a theme or some sense out of it then kudos. You win a prize.

As DOUR is bleeding from the eyes due to an overdose of future and Tucson, I am taking this opportunity to usurp oust seize for my own ends offer my humble services as a replacement Prophet.

Now I'm not as accurate as DOUR, nor as polite and tolerant of the horrors the your various futures hold.

So step right up one and all. Your future happiness, health, wealth, horrific disfiguring injuries, mistaken lottery wins and reasons for your untimely death (and in more than one instance, murder) are just a question away. Future joys and woes exposed for the low, low price of my own amusement. Do you want to know more? Of course you do!

Here's a freebie - One of you gets molested by an iguana this year. In the ear.
For reasons I have yet to fully understand, I spent a significant chunk of time yesterday in "Build-A-Bear".

If you have been fortunate enough to escape this concept, here:

I lasted about 10 minutes before my wife had to remove me. The reasons follow:

1- Upon entering the first, and I mean the fucking first thing I see is a giant My Little Pony. Which looks exactly like the one from that picture. It's being examined by a man in his late 30's. Unlike most patrons, this man does not appear to have a child with him. I managed to suppress the laugh to a snort.

2- The concept of the place is unsettling. You are surrounded initially by the skins of empty stuffed toys. You hand pick your 3rd world made  cuddly toy and queue to allow someone to fill the skin with whatever crap it is they use for this. Asbestos wool or something I think. Looks like it at least. They insisted it isn't. Anyway, this whole procedure takes a surprisingly long time for the size of toy you are actually getting. The main objective here is for the filler to upsell you the various outfits, voiceboxes and other assorted add-ons that can be had for very reasonable prices each but end up at quite alarming numbers when added together. The stealth money extraction is handled quite nicely.

3 - Now in possession of your stuffed toy, you are directed towards various stations where you can dress and add various accessories. By this point you should be acutely aware that you're basically in Walt Disney's idea of a sweatshop. Every tag ID's the produce as made by countries with questionable labour laws and rights. This is where the horror started to kick in for me. Kids making crap to send around the world for other kids to assemble. Around the same time as this realisation, I noticed I was being moved gently but forcefully to the exit by my wife.

4 - Outside, being bathed in day-glo horror, I was kind of numb. That many primary colours will do that to a body. That is, until I heard my wife pay for the memento of child labour rights violations.

I suspect that this place is actually a minor outpost of hell trying to break through to our reality. All other explanations seem lacking.

ETA- My wife is now threatening to never take me shopping again. I pray to all gods that this threat is carried out.
RPG Ghetto / Papers, Please
January 31, 2014, 07:58:50 PM

Quote"The communist state of Arstotzka has ended a 6-year war with neighboring Kolechia and reclaimed its rightful half of the border town, Grestin. Your job as immigration inspector is to control the flow of people entering the Arstotzkan side of Grestin from Kolechia. Among the throngs of immigrants and visitors looking for work are hidden smugglers, spies, and terrorists. Using only the documents provided by travelers and the Ministry of Admission's primitive inspect, search, and fingerprint systems you must decide who can enter Arstotzka and who will be turned away or arrested."

I heard about this a while ago and suspect it may be of interest to some. There seems to be a growing market for games of this nature and that could be very interesting. The concept here opens up quite a few different discussions and none are particularly clear cut or comfortable. Any game that actively seeks to cause cognitive dissonance has to be worth something and this one seems to do it very nicely.
So there's a decent story regarding Israel quite often and I've just been shoving them in random news. Flicking back over the past few months, there's pretty much no end of strange shit so I'll start shoving it here instead.

Today, we have this:

QuoteA Hollywood producer behind hit films such as Pretty Woman and Fight Club has said he spied for Israel in support of its nuclear programme.

Arnon Milchan, who was born in what is now Israel, gave an account to Israeli investigative programme Uvda.

Mr Milchan said he performed dozens of clandestine missions on behalf of Israel after he was recruited by Shimon Peres, now Israel's president.

"I did it for my country and I'm proud of it," he said.

QuoteMr Milchan told Uvda that rumours of his own involvement with Israel had swirled around Hollywood for years and he wished he had addressed them head on.

"In Hollywood, they don't like working with an arms dealer, ideologically... with someone who lives off selling machine guns and killing," he said. "Instead of someone talking to me about a script, I had to spend half an hour explaining that I'm not an arms dealer.

"I'm not an arms dealer, I don't sell guns, I don't sell rockets," he added. "If people knew how many times I risked my life, back and forth, again and again, for my country."

Like many of these stories, I have no idea how much shady shit is also involved here beyond "A lot". What you can see is the reaction to the story. Is the USA pissed and demanding extradition? Behave. The man is clearly crazy and there is no history of people in entertainment being involved in espionage. There will certainly be no collusion of any sort or any money changing hands either. 

The other scary thing is the straight up bug eyed "I'M RIGHT" conviction. From the Knesset to the frontier settlers this attitude scares the shit out of me. If his claims have any substance then I'm sure he'll have been convinced he did the correct thing. Which could have some unpleasant repercussions in the future.
Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / FAO - WAFFLES
November 22, 2013, 05:57:45 PM
Heard "Das Seelenbrechen" by Ihsahn yet?

If not, drop whatever the fuck you're doing and get it. I'll wait.
So, did you see the latest about Spying the NSA and that guy? The NEW revelations? Of course you fucking didn't. This shit comes out daily in amounts that no single person can process. Only the biggest bits get told to many and then heavily filtered to the views you are supposed to hold. It's not your fault, you just don't have time. No one does. No one has the time to listen to people who do take the time either. Life's fucking frantic everyday, right? Sometimes it's a struggle to just know which family members are alive, let alone think about shit half a planet away.

None of it is new anyway. You know the nice men in sharp suits aren't really that nice. You've already resigned yourself to the internet not being serious business. Hell, your ID has probably been stolen twice already anyway, right? So it's no big deal really that Amazon, Google or any other company or website you can name funnels data to the NSA. They wouldn't be interested in your thing would they? And you've done nothing wrong anyway, right?

Tales of government shenanigans with technology are as old as the technology. This is not new. You are reading a forum that is routinely hit with bots when certain topics are discussed. You know this. You still post here. You've got nothing to fear, right?

So what do you do? Nothing. You still got that book from amazon, have google as your browser and search engine, all tied to your iphone and virtual wallets. You have nothing to fear, because if you DID you'd be FUCKED already.

Or maybe you do have something to worry about. Maybe a bitcoin got caught up in the silk road. Maybe you get a knock on the door in a year when they've sorted through the data. Or 5 years. Maybe never. Maybe someone leaves the data in a suitcase on a train and it vanishes. Or maybe that game you just couldn't afford and would totally buy on steam next sale is a marked torrent. Maybe you've now got a 5 figure fine and the RIAA claiming you owe them 3 million for your Vanilla Ice fetish.

Maybe none of this happens. Maybe we wouldn't have to think like this if people kept what they were told in confidence confidential. Maybe you shouldn't have thought I was being crazy and paranoid because I might be a little more pleasant if my crazy paranoia wasn't on the news every day.

Society is a compromise between Freedom and the ability of the state to intrude on those freedoms. I'm pretty sure there's no incentive for the state to discuss this with the people, so you best start using the freedom you've got. You don't know how long you're going to have it.
Or Kill Me / My Hate - Part 1 - Homelessness
November 07, 2013, 04:54:37 PM
Some things have been really fucking bothering me lately.

It may be because I've moved to a town that makes my stomach turn regularly. It may be because the homelessness problem here seems much more pronounced than my last stay.

On a purely personal level, I despise the concept of homelessness. I live in a country where a significant number of people own second (Or third, or X) homes. I routinely drive past boarded up and derelict premises. For a living, I tell people how to destroy these buildings. As far as I have been able to establish, there is no actual shortage of living space in the UK. The problem seems to be is that a lot of that potential living space is worth more empty and derelict. Tax breaks, Tax write-off, offsetting profits and all other manner of interesting financial tricks can turn a shit-heap into a goldmine. As long as no humans live there.

Winter started here pretty much overnight. The general temperatures have gone from 7-8C to -1 -3C. Every fucking day I drive past people huddled in shop entrances and less windy spots. The sheer number of them has increased dramatically. I'd like to look further than "Austerity" but this seems to be the answer I keep getting.

Realistically, there is little I can do to help. When I can, I buy a guy a burger and spend some time just talking. I don't do this often. The level of thanks I get seems to be placing me into some unjustified sainthood. I'm just a human that sees another cold and hungry and being ignored and want to show a little fucking compassion for a few seconds. This does not mean I'm Christ reborn.

The reactions(and non-reactions) of others to people in this situation stuns me. It's shows something about the times we live in. It's easier to ignore them than it is to help, regardless of the way. This could say something about how we act as a society at large. Is the problem easy to ignore? Yes? What fucking problem?

I really don't know how to process much of this yet, but all I know is that I'm angry. I'm driving past people who will literally freeze to death in the coming months because the support to prevent this happening simply isn't there. To say this bothers me is an understatement.

I'm acutely aware that there tends to be a "story" with homelessness. The vast majority of these tales could have easily been me for a minor quirk of fate. But I'm inside and warm, looking out on misery and death.

Fuck this place, I should never have returned.
November 07, 2013, 04:26:09 PM

QuoteSaudi Arabia has invested in Pakistani nuclear weapons projects, and believes it could obtain atomic bombs at will, a variety of sources have told BBC Newsnight.

While the kingdom's quest has often been set in the context of countering Iran's atomic programme, it is now possible that the Saudis might be able to deploy such devices more quickly than the Islamic republic.

Earlier this year, a senior Nato decision maker told me that he had seen intelligence reporting that nuclear weapons made in Pakistan on behalf of Saudi Arabia are now sitting ready for delivery.

Last month Amos Yadlin, a former head of Israeli military intelligence, told a conference in Sweden that if Iran got the bomb, "the Saudis will not wait one month. They already paid for the bomb, they will go to Pakistan and bring what they need to bring."

QuoteNewsnight contacted both the Pakistani and Saudi governments. The Pakistan Foreign Ministry has described our story as "speculative, mischievous and baseless".

It adds: "Pakistan is a responsible nuclear weapon state with robust command and control structures and comprehensive export controls."

The Saudi embassy in London has also issued a statement pointing out that the Kingdom is a signatory to the Non-Proliferation Treaty and has worked for a nuclear free Middle East.

But it also points out that the UN's "failure to make the Middle East a nuclear free zone is one of the reasons the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia rejected the offer of a seat on the UN Security Council".

It says the Saudi Foreign Minister has stressed that this lack of international action "has put the region under the threat of a time bomb that cannot easily be defused by manoeuvring around it".

The article is rather good with general background to the region.

What this seems to be though, is confirmation that Saudi Arabia may not be a nuclear power, but they can be at any time they so choose.

Peace in the middle east? Fucking terrible for profits and this will keep money moving around nicely.

Hi. Take a seat.

I'm going to try and be as nice about this as I can be, but I just don't see you in the same way any more. You actually make me a little sick just to think about you.

The problem, you see, is that belief of yours. I know and understand that you believe THAT, but I believe THIS. Now we both know THIS and THAT can't possibly be compatible. I'm certain that THAT is wrong and THIS is right. It's unfortunate, because I used to respect you a lot. Now that I know about THAT, we can no longer be friends. Hell, I can't even talk to you civilly, I'm holding it all in right now because really? THAT is DUMB and THIS is clearly right. Every idiot knows THIS is right.

So I'll still be here, I just won't respond to you or consider you as important as before because a single belief is literally all I can see in you now. I know we agree about THEM and THOSE and THINGS. It's just because you believe THAT that I can't ever take you seriously ever again.

Now you might be quite happy about this, but really, fuck you. Thinking THAT instead of THIS is just fucking unacceptable. Obviously you are just this belief alone and so I can just comfortably ignore any future contribution you make. All because of THAT. You might have been able to save this, but I'm just too self righteous to care.

If you ever change your mind and see how THIS is clearly right, I'll try and not be too smug.
Aneristic Illusions / Unlimited Egypt Thread
September 24, 2013, 09:13:11 AM
To try and keep it in one place because this isn't calming down anytime soon.

QuoteA court in Egypt has banned "all activities" by the Muslim Brotherhood.

The Cairo Court for Urgent Matters said the ruling applied to the Islamist movement, its non-governmental organisation and any affiliated groups.

It also ordered the interim government to seize the Brotherhood's funds and form a panel to administer its frozen assets until any appeal had been heard.

The military authorities have launched a crackdown on the group since ousting President Mohammed Morsi on 3 July.

Dozens of senior figures, including its general guide Mohammed Badie, have been detained on suspicion of inciting violence and murder.

Hundreds of people demanding Mr Morsi's reinstatement, most of them Brotherhood members, have also been killed in clashes with security forces, who portray the crackdown as a struggle against "terrorism".

While somewhat inevitable, it's practically guaranteed to cause a lot of death in the foreseeable future.

QuoteEveryone talks about the Illuminati. You may have heard Jay Z and Beyonce are members of the Illuminati, and channel demons when they perform. You may have heard Obama is a member of the Illuminati, and plans to implant microchips in all U.S. citizens, to prepare for martial law. You may have heard the dollar bill contains secret symbols, which reveal the U.S. has been controlled by the Illuminati for hundreds of years.

Illuminati theory helps oppressed people to explain our experiences in the hood. Society throws horrible stuff in our faces: our family members get locked up for bullshit. Our friends kill each other over beefs, money or turf. Our future is full of dead-end jobs that don't pay shit. We struggle to pay bills while others live in luxury. On TV, we see people all over the world dying in poverty, even though we live in the most materially abundant society in history. Most people act like none of these terrible things are happening. Why does this occur? We start looking for answers, and Illuminati theory provides one.

We believe Illuminati theory is wrong, and we wrote this pamphlet to offer a different answer. We wrote this pamphlet because we know people who think about the Illuminati usually want to stop oppression and exploitation. They're some of the smartest people in the hood today. Forty years ago, Illuminati theorists would've been in the Black Panther Party. Today most of them sit around and talk endlessly about conspiracies. This is a waste of talent. The world is in a deep crisis, and big protests, rebellions and revolutions are happening. In Egypt, South Africa, Turkey–and even in the U.S.–these movements are already taking 


People who 


we can't 


anything because no 




fighting are simply refusing to join the fight themselves. With the right tools, we can participate in these actions, and make history with millions of others.

I've not read the whole thing yet, but that 3rd paragraph caught my eye. May be something of quality here.
Aneristic Illusions / UK Internet Porn Ban.
July 22, 2013, 08:00:58 PM
QuoteMost households in the UK will have pornography blocked by their internet provider unless they choose to receive it, David Cameron has announced.

In addition, the prime minister said possessing online pornography depicting rape would become illegal in England and Wales - in line with Scotland.

Mr Cameron warned in a speech that access to online pornography was "corroding childhood".

The new measures will apply to both existing and new customers.

This is going to get hilarious.

QuoteMr Cameron also called for some "horrific" internet search terms to be "blacklisted", meaning they would automatically bring up no results on websites such as Google or Bing.

He told the BBC he expected a "row" with service providers who, he said in his speech, were "not doing enough to take responsibility" despite having a "moral duty" to do so.

He also warned he could have to "force action" by changing the law and that, if there were "technical obstacles", firms should use their "greatest brains" to overcome them.

This is from the people that could find an effective way to block YO HO HO .com

QuoteHe said: "I want to talk about the internet, the impact it is having on the innocence of our children, how online pornography is corroding childhood.

"And how, in the darkest corners of the internet, there are things going on that are a direct danger to our children, and that must be stamped out.

I'm not making this speech because I want to moralise or scaremonger, but because I feel profoundly as a politician, and as a father, that the time for action has come. This is, quite simply, about how we protect our children and their innocence."

But former Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre boss Jim Gamble told BBC Radio 4's Today programme it was important to "get to the root cause" of illegal pornography, by catching those responsible for creating it.

He added: "You need a real deterrent, not a pop-up that paedophiles will laugh at."

But Ms Perry argued filters would make a difference, saying that the killers of schoolgirls April Jones and Tia Sharp had accessed legal pornography before moving on to images of child abuse.

She added: "It's impossible to buy this material in a sex shop... but it's possible to have it served up on a computer every day."

In his speech, Mr Cameron said possession of online pornography depicting rape would be made illegal.

The reaction I've seen to this so far would be pretty much exactly what you'd expect. Conservatives smug, Liberals screeching and very little attention paid to the fact that Cameron has refused to publicly condemn page 3(some tabloids tradition to show topless woman on, page 3.)

The whole thing is a fucking joke. Aside from the censorship issues and lists due to opt-in, it seems totally and utterly unworkable.

So come world, and laugh at the UK. Our PM is actually trying to block boobs from the internet. On the plus side, Tons of MP's are about to have their porn habits exposed.
The redemption thread made me start thinking about the concept as applied to groups. This is pretty broad and can include: Governments, Corporations, Charities, faith groups, you get the idea I hope.

All entities like this are, and frequently have done some horrific shit. It's not a challenge to name any number of examples. What I am considering here is how these often faceless things can earn redemption in the eyes of society.

You could say that in capitalist culture, any "group" still "trading" (Churches peddle their wares just as much, though not as efficiently as, say, Pepsi) has no need or desire for redemption. If the profit margins (Note, all of these things rely on consistent profit.) are constant or rising, this would indicate that their actions are viewed as acceptable for the majority of the public. Any positive actions by them must then be viewed as suspect as it would point to desire for increased profit.

Most of these groups have a hierarchy within them that would indicate those closer to the top are more responsible for any actions taken by the group. Here we may encounter individuals seeking redemption, but it is much more common to stick with the group. Pack mentality, it's core to the Police, Military, Wall Street, The Vatican and many more. It's them against US. This helps me see why there is so much attention when a member breaks ranks and denounces the group.

So how do you go about redeeming groups exhibiting societally perceived negative behaviours? I'd suggest 3 main methods are used: Regulation, De-regulation and self-regulation.

Regulation is almost always touted as being "bad" for the group. It will hurt it and therefore you in some way. So don't do it.

De-Regulation is "good" and opens up opportunities to be exploited. Many people have become very, very wealthy from de-regulation (And the other 2, but especially this one)

Self regulation lets all the groups kind of like you create your rules. Corruption all the way down.

With all 3 avenues leading to much the same place, i.e - The group continues as it was, it seems to place the responsibility on to society to correct negative behaviours. As noted, some boycotts and protests have had successes, though these are the exception more than the norm. How's Occupy doing? Yeah.

Maybe a page needs to be taken from FOX news. Sensationalise the shit out of every group fuck-up, no matter how minor or petty. Create a huge stinking target for worldwide disdain with every single slip. Embarrass the fucks into acting in a more socially responsible way. Treble all fines and use them to run adverts with the CEO's face crudely photo shopped onto faeces. At Prime-time. All year. With Full name, occupation and reason. After a year they go onto the reel that shows 24/7 on it's own channel. Or something. We need to be more creative than we are now.

What I'm getting at here, is that fines and jail are not enough for those who commit the greatest evils. I'm not saying gladiatorial arena, but I won't make a sad face if you do.

More seriously, measures need to be vastly more punitive and public.

Somewhat rambling, but I hope that's a starting point for something

QuoteThe US National Security Agency (NSA) is collecting the telephone records of tens of millions of Americans, according to the Guardian newspaper.

The British paper published what it said was a secret court order directing the Verizon company to hand over electronic data on all its customers on an "ongoing daily basis".

Civil liberties groups said the details of the report were "stunning".

The US government, security agencies and Verizon have not commented.

The US Center for Constitutional Rights said it appeared to be "the broadest surveillance order to ever have been issued".

QuoteFormer Vice President Al Gore said in a tweet: "In digital era, privacy must be a priority. Is it just me, or is secret blanket surveillance obscenely outrageous?"

Two Democrat senators have been pressing the Obama administration to be clear about the scope of its public surveillance.

Last year, Mark Udall and Ron Wyden wrote to US Attorney General Eric Holder saying they believed "most Americans would be stunned" by the government's "secret legal interpretations" of the Patriot Act.

The White House came under heavy criticism last month after papers were leaked showing it had gathered the phone records of journalists at the Associated Press.

Nixon was truly ahead of his time, he just thought too small.

If you do it to everyone it's normal and ergo "Fair". Why these people are not funding googleglass and the inevitable competitors is beyond me. I would have thought such a device to be like all their birthdays, Christmases and various similar holidays come at once for them.

QuoteWASHINGTON (AP) — The Justice Department secretly obtained two months of telephone records of reporters and editors for The Associated Press in what the news cooperative's top executive called a "massive and unprecedented intrusion" into how news organizations gather the news.

The records obtained by the Justice Department listed outgoing calls for the work and personal phone numbers of individual reporters, for general AP office numbers in New York, Washington and Hartford, Conn., and for the main number for the AP in the House of Representatives press gallery, according to attorneys for the AP. It was not clear if the records also included incoming calls or the duration of the calls.

In all, the government seized the records for more than 20 separate telephone lines assigned to AP and its journalists in April and May of 2012. The exact number of journalists who used the phone lines during that period is unknown, but more than 100 journalists work in the offices where phone records were targeted, on a wide array of stories about government and other matters.

In a letter of protest sent to Attorney General Eric Holder on Monday, AP President and Chief Executive Officer Gary Pruitt said the government sought and obtained information far beyond anything that could be justified by any specific investigation. He demanded the return of the phone records and destruction of all copies.

"There can be no possible justification for such an overbroad collection of the telephone communications of The Associated Press and its reporters. These records potentially reveal communications with confidential sources across all of the newsgathering activities undertaken by the AP during a two-month period, provide a road map to AP's newsgathering operations and disclose information about AP's activities and operations that the government has no conceivable right to know," Pruitt said.

The UK still can't get it's shit together over the Leveson Report yet the US seems to be having much better success with press control.

It is time for the ruling council to formally pass the buck to a new MEXICO. We have plundered all we can from this position, and are quite frankly, bored.

Thus we now open nominations for the new MEXICO.

So far the candidates are:

Known self confessed lizard person TGGR - He has made claims that he will deliver the second part of the joke. His is a Known and self confessed lizard person. These factors must surely weigh upon your decision.

Deposed Mexico EOC - No second part of the joke. Claimed you would come crawling back to him. Will you?

The Current interim ruling Junta - We never wanted this. But we have gifted all we could while we got it. BORED NOW.

New candidates may apply now.

Standard voting rules for new MEXICOS apply. All decisions ultimately arbitrary and final. No arguments.

So rejoice, a new MEXICO will soon be upon us.

Well this is probably going to get very, very messy. I'll try to keep this coherent but shout if there's anything that needs more detail.

In this post(s?), I am going to try and provide a short version of the nature of Game Theory and Mechanism Design and how these relate to online and offline communities.

What is Game theory? Wikipedia tells us that :
QuoteGame theory is a study of strategic decision making. More formally, it is "the study of mathematical models of conflict and cooperation between intelligent rational decision-makers."[1] An alternative term suggested "as a more descriptive name for the discipline" is interactive decision theory.[2] Game theory is mainly used in economics, political science, and psychology, as well as logic and biology.

Let's simplify that a touch. Any situation where your decisions are based upon the decisions of another person can be classed as a game. Anything Single player does not count. We are looking at why you make certain choices based on the actions of others. There is an built in assumption that everyone will act both Rationally and with their own self interest in mind.

Lets define some terms:

Game - For our purposes here a "game" will require
1-More than 1 person
2 - Interactions are possible beween players
3 - There must be some kind of decision
4 - There must be some kind of payoff/reward

Utility - This is what you are playing the game for. In a FPS the utility is to get the most kills. In a race the utility would be to come first. Game theory assumes that all people involved will have the same utility in mind. When players choose to follow a separate utility, griefing or trolling is soon to follow.

Payoff - Highly changable depending on the game. This could be a high score, Gold Medal, social approval. Think of this as what you "win"

Decision - The game must allow for players to make choices. Snakes and Ladders technically isn't a game under this definition. You just roll dice. The same could be said for athletic sports like running, you only have the choice of one strategy, Run Fast. Any other strategy is irrational.

Strategy - Think of every move you can make in a game of chess from start to end. That is one strategy.

Tactics - Think of an individual move in a game of chess. That is one tactic (This is sloppy but will do for the moment).

Perfect Information - This is where you have knowledge of everything that has taken place in the game. There are no hidden variables and win states are clear from both sides. Consider a RTS game with and without the "fog of War". Without the fog of war, you have a perfect information game. With the fog of war, you do not.

Pareto Efficiency/Frontier - I've seen this called both. Think of a fighting game with 3 guys. You have the stong guy, the fast guy and the medium guy. The idea here essentially is "Give something to get something". If Strong guy is stronger and just as fast as Fast guy, it would be irrational to ever pick Fast or medium guy. Many games have balancing problems and it can often be down to this. You'll never pick option X as option Y is always there and is simply better. Think of an FPS where a player is unstoppable with a certain weapon and others are never seen. That's bad Pareto Efficiency.

Solvable/Random/Arbitrary - Games can generally be broken into these 3 catergories. Solvable games are things like Draughts and Tic-tac-toe. There is a clear set path to win. Random games are much more difficult to create effective strategies for. Arbitrary games can only be won by either not playing or acting as randomly as possible (Think rock-paper-scissors)

What is Mechanism Design?

Mechanism design is the set of ideas that the way the game is played can influence those playing it. By choosing (Or omitting) certain game mechanics, game developers directly indirectly influence the end game in various ways. Take the most obvious for a moment, Monetization. I'll get to that. A key point here is that most developers will use various mechanics, little consideration is given to the impact on the rest of the game and player base.

More to come.

It has been several weeks now. We are still lacking the second part of the joke.

Failure to produce the joke, or at the least a plan of the joke, will result in your MEXICO status being revoked post-haste.

Open elections will then run in the glorious peoples republic of Mexico to find new MEXICO and you remember what happened to the last MEXICO who didn't produce the joke? That will happen to YOU.

You were warned. You ignored us.

All are encouraged to hound MEXICO until the joke appears or he admits the truth of his false election. He's still not even shown his sombrero.

The 13/14thesthses
Aneristic Illusions / O HAPPY DAY
April 08, 2013, 01:09:45 PM
Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / Spot the creepy
January 15, 2013, 03:42:52 PM

Yes, it's the sun. It's ALL creepy, but in this "article" there's some crackers.

The stand out for me was this:

QuoteJennifer's surgery at 15 saw her boobs increase two cup sizes to a 36C. Fat removed from her body was pumped into her buttocks. Karen started at 14 with a £2,000 nose job. That was followed by a boob job a year later.
She said: "I had a 21-year-old boyfriend but I was really skinny with tiny boobs.
"All his ex-girlfriends had big boobs so I felt really insecure. It took me months to persuade my mum but eventually she let me."

Yes, That does appear to be The Sun (Who above all remember, remind us that paedophiles must be hung drawn and quatered on live TV) endorsing a 14/15 year old to have plastic surgery to please someone at least 6 years senior.

The flip-flop at the end also amuses me.

Ah Humanity. The asteroid can't hit soon enough.
This is(will) be a lot longer than my previous posts. It may(will) be disjointed, raise more questions than answers will my Layman(total belming fool) take on some things. I'll try and shove in a few funnies. Remember to laugh politely at the appropriate times.
(If this is in the wrong place or would suit another section better, please move it or take it up with someone who can.)
(There will also be parenthesis) (There's a TL;DR if you are now thinking "Fuck you") (Fuck you too)

Disclaimer over, Lets get into this.

Firstly, Relevant background. I have played A LOT of games. I probably have saved games older than some of you. I could tell you scary amounts of detail about more than a few dozen. What I'm saying here is I've broken my share of Mice, Keyboards, consoles, gamepads, joysticks and any other gear that you'd care to name. I also haven't really bothered playing any for a fair few years.

The reason is, pretty much all of them fucking sucked.

Harsh conclusion, and I came to this by learning a great deal more about Game theory. No, we're not talking about PUA bullshit, we can snigger about that later. I'm thinking more along the lines of this

(Educational break, this is about an hour, but does cover the subject pretty well so at least we're all kind of thinking about the same Kinda thing here. Or look around and read up on wikipedia or something if this stuff means nothing to you.) (I told you there would be brackets)

That's the more technical side. When you start to break down the games you play directly in terms of the mechanics, they seem to become a totally different experience. Take Diablo 2. I FUCKING LOVED D2. I played that game a horrendous amount. Don't even try and say you did worse, I've probably got the saves somewhere to prove it. When you view it as an exercise in the skinner box mechanic applied to my psyche(And judging from the size of the player base it had and WOW has,) it's an incredible achievement. Never got Sucked into WOW thank gods, I was self aware enough to know that if I even touched that I may as well go and buy a big sack o' crack.

Anyway, point being, look at your favourite game, in terms of pure mechanics. What are you actually doing and WHY does it give you enjoyment? Why do we not consider our entertainment more frequently? As I understand it, to tackle our reality properly, do we not have to examine these things as critically if not moreso than political/social phenomena? I would place it at a similar importance as we choose to consume these media of our own volition. No one made me play any of these games. If you've never had the "I'll go to bed in a minute" then play for 3 more hours, say "fuck it" then playing for another few days" moment or similar then you're probably more interested in the next thing.

Another reason that pretty much all of these games sucked, would be for the same reason a lot of films or books sucked. There's just no emotional engagement.
Other thing,

Lots of good points in here again. Take the Zombie game he came up with. 2 Parents, 2 kids, each has a specific strength, a relatively easy to manage praeto frontier. If you kept the difficulty options open and allowed people to dick about with what the characters look like, this would sell millions.

Out of all the games I've played, I can narrow down the ones that actually had something that touched me on an emotional level down to about a dozen. While I would argue any of those to be amazing games, is this not an unusually low number compared to how many pieces of music/art/film/etc would be considered to be emotionally moving? 

Look at the motherfucking adverts for the New Deus Ex. Those adverts have asked better questions about transhumanism than the vast majority of blogs devoted to the subject. For a term that is only likely to be more widespread and relevant over the next few hundred years, why not push the boundaries in terms of plot? With video games now protected by the 1st amendment, should and/or could this then not become a pseudo political platform? It seems possible to engineer a game towards a mindset that would allow the player to empathise more with a presented choice. Consider the potential that this is already the case with the spate of FPS derivates.

Marine Vs (ethnic minority here) in (get the idea?)

I recall hearing something along the lines of similar reflexes being shared between helicopter pilots and top fps players. I doubt the fitness level matches, but a way to utilise that same basic reflex... Drones? They've been getting popular.

Final point before the wonderful TL;DR
Have a final video for getting down here.
20 mins. Made me chuckle. 

If you've got this far, then blessings on your hide my child. May the sun gods wake you gently. For everyone else......


1- Look at your favourite game/s. Identify the key mechanic/s. What does this say about you? If it's something like farmville consider thy life. Does this information/perspective change your feeling toward the game?

2 - Emotional engagement in games, Have you had any and should this be pursued? Why the fuck are people not more interested in this? A way to create genuinely unique experiences could be the potential here?

3 - People are stupid part MMDII part 16c. Modern games spoonfed people.

4-Make what you want of that, Just wanted to get a few ideas out of my head and see if they clicked with anyone.

Aneristic Illusions / Invisible Wanker
March 16, 2012, 11:33:08 PM
More Kony bullshit, but this time worth noting.

QuoteJason Russell, 33,  was allegedly found masturbating in public, vandalizing cars and possibly under the influence of something, according to the SDPD

QuoteInvisible Children's CEO Ben Keesey released a statement after 1:40 p.m. on Friday saying:
"Jason Russell was unfortunately hospitalized yesterday suffering from exhaustion, dehydration, and malnutrition. He is now receiving medical care and is focused on getting better. The past two weeks have taken a severe emotional toll on all of us, Jason especially, and that toll manifested itself in an unfortunate incident yesterday. Jason's passion and his work have done so much to help so many, and we are devastated to see him dealing with this personal health issue. We will always love and support Jason, and we ask that you give his entire family privacy during this difficult time."

So.... yeah.

Unfortunate incident. Exhaustion. Not crack at all.
Aneristic Illusions / Corruption in the Met
February 13, 2012, 04:27:31 PM

"Metropolitan Police commander Ali Dizaei has been found guilty of misconduct in a public office and perverting the course of justice."

Taking all bets on the expected sentence. I'm guessing 3 months on tag. We can't have police commanders in jail, it may give the impression that they're some kind of criminal

Edit - He's been given 3 years. An unusual display of balls from UK courts. "Sources" state that his initial 15 months imprisonment prior to it being quashed will be taken in to consideration so it's looking like 21 months. Add good behaviour to that it's probably closer to 12-18 months.

Got to love "justice" and "Quotation marks"