It's not laughter if you're just going through the muscle movements you remember from the times you actually gave a fuck.

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Messages - Junkenstein

I've easily seen over 400 fuckers start and leave. It is by far one of the most bizarre places I've ever worked at.

Quick highlights :

Fighting in work will not get you sacked. Or even disciplined.

To increase "employee retention" a points system was put in place for unexplained absence. 1 instance =4 points. At 150 points you get a "letter of concern". Retention technically improved, as it now takes about a month for management to admit they've probably gone for good.

The multiple people that thought the best place for a crafty joint is near the gas tanks.

The new flt driver who drove straight into the portacabin.

Casper the friendly crackhead. Who gets touched up by ghosts and has hundreds of thousands of pounds worth of drugs.

Management sent on regular courses to improve productivity. It's been at a steady 20% since I got here.

Paying 15k for a "workstation" thats made of about 30 quids worth of steel and half a day's welding.

There's so much more. I'm in a very odd Greek hell and can't escape.

Unsure. The work is simple, but requires at least 6 bodies to occur. Training is about a week. The average new start lasts around 7 hours. Often less. To say I've been dealing with social dregs would be a huge understatement.

I think the worst week so far has been given 4 sex offenders. Overt hinting that a background check would be done (lie, place cannot afford any kind of basic check) got rid of 3. The fourth had a shitty jeep thing that I promise you had fucking toy story dolls nailed and glued all over it.

"is this your car?"
"yeah, different innit?"
"what's your favourite Michael Jackson album?"
"what do you think about rolf Harris's art?"
"I'm not a pedo!"
"I never said anything of the sort. How many kids do you have?"
"I see. This will probably end poorly if you stay. Only monsters work here, and most are family monsters. And less polite than me."
"I'm not a pedo!"
Gesture at car "this is not a good look for a 35 year old male with a foot long beard who stinks of weed."
"it makes me stand out"
"yes. Yes it does. I assume the police will be grateful."
"I'm not a pedo!"

Spoiler, he was. Arrested for drugs outside a school about a month after I got rid of it.
I'm still in this fucking cave.

Job has a 6% retention rate. Been here over 4 years. Was supposed to be 2 weeks.

Send help, last new recruits provided little nourishment.
Pretty sure P3NTS been working with Danny elfman

Sunak apparently at birthday party, at least one.

Rumor is one party was for dog.

Not dead, still in cave send help making electricity has been difficult
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Picking Cain's Brains
September 02, 2021, 09:21:52 PM
Would parts really be a problem? I would heavily assume the arms manufacturer creed of "if I don't sell it to them, someone else will" would apply. A bit of lobbying and trade deal/sanctions and sooner or later its all operational enough.

And that's without random idiot acts, just corporate logic.

Hells, the way reality currently works there was probably never a war to begin with.
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Picking Cain's Brains
August 29, 2021, 07:28:38 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 27, 2021, 05:23:05 PM
Which cities are you referring to, Faust? I've tried looking but obviously there's a lot of Afghanistan news lately.

As for going back in...depends. I can't see Biden doing a U-turn, even in light of current events. I can see him launching drone strikes at whomever is deemed the responsible party...but in the longer term it will depend how much the Taliban pivot between their "responsible members of the international community with extreme views" and "actually supporting international terrorism and genocide" wings.

From the reports  of various arms, biometric data, aircraft etc. That got abandoned, it feels like 1 wing got a bit of bonus.

Is it just me that finds it incredible that not only has a 20 odd year conflict been totally lost, the fleeing nations have chosen to arm the erstwhile for to fuck on the way out? Realistically, if its a logistics problem and you just can't shift all your shit in time, moving it into a big pile and throwing a match is surely both the spiteful and sensible option. This is shit that is designed to explode. The problem can literally solve itself.

So, with more than a few states probably willing to supply training, parts etc. I'm cutting my guess down to 2 and a half. Bidens not got the balls to launch what I assume would be needed to be several hundred drone strikes in a leaving blitzkrieg and doing so would make the US into a bit of a pariah state. Easier to wait for an atrocity or two and start again. Probably better for the war economy too.
Best of luck to her Roger, fuck cancer etc.

Sincerely hope this has a better than expected result.
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Picking Cain's Brains
August 26, 2021, 05:46:08 PM
So, what's the current expectation on going back? I was guessing 5 years or so, but with a couple of bombs today in kabul I'm cutting that to under 3. One successful bombing on us/associates soil and its prime fodder for a particular kind of electioneering.
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Picking Cain's Brains
July 23, 2021, 09:13:55 PM
I'm in the UK.

I can strongly empathise with both an island nation and urge to do a coup. And if I did, I'd be sure at least two other fucks would join in. Itd Probably be at least be between farage, piers Morgan, count binface, p3nt Cain, blair and me. And I'm reasonably certain we're each waiting for the other to go first.
RPG Ghetto / Re: Unified Vidya Games thread
July 23, 2021, 09:05:44 PM
Quote from: Cain on March 12, 2021, 07:25:02 PM
I have heard good things about Tyranny. I picked it up for free from the Epic store, but I've not yet committed myself to sitting down and giving it a playthrough

Have you given this a fair try yet? I quite liked it, and there are a few nice "betrayal! moments. Which only happen if you really look for them, but that's actually quite nicely done too.
Oh, didn't know it was time for another one yet.

I'm due to emerge from the cave at some point in the next few weeks, for perhaps 4 days. I have seen you've all made great progress with that global warming shit while I've been underground.

Reminder: unnecessary personal posts interesting only to the poster are a mandatory part of death rattle threads. Expecting at least 2 recipes by page 5.
Not been lurking for a few weeks, this is the new open bar, right?
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Picking Cain's Brains
July 13, 2021, 12:48:08 PM
From what I've seen so far, there's some kind of 3 way power struggle going on, which is great. Nothing like trying to do a kind of coup and having 2 other fucks join in.

So, might just be the start of a huge shitshow.

Aneristic Illusions / Re: Picking Cain's Brains
July 11, 2021, 06:43:57 PM
Much obliged gents, will dig into it over the next few weeks.

I'm honestly surprised more isn't being made of this generally.