I know, I know. There are quite a few people here really into this sort of shit.
I'm not knocking anyone for enjoying the shit they enjoy, especially when they put actual, real life effort into it. Substantiate it so to speak. I actually find that cool, no matter what the particulars are.
Still...
ENOUGH.
FUCKING.
STAR WARS.
SERIOUSLY.
I like the movies. I even enjoyed the recent ones. Watching Vader be all melty and shit. It was cool. They had their moments, is what I'm saying. Sure, they also had their very bad, extensively horrible, painfully atrocious moments, whatever. But like any other played out, beaten and broken money pump things are getting ragged, it doesn't matter how much you primp and cover with fancy make-up: hackneyed trash is as hackneyed trash does. (I'm looking at YOU Clone Wars cartoon.)
It's got to stop sometime, right? Lucasfilm can't continuously pump out plastic product after plastic product and stamp their legacy on ANY FUCKING MEDIUM POSSIBLE FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY CAN THEY? I think they can. I think they are going to. Forever.
I just...I'm just a little exasperated because of character voices on Tom Tom's and lightsaber sounds on iPhones and themed weddings I've been to and the children I'm around with the toys and the tv shows and moichendise moichendise moichendise. FOR THREE GOD DAMNED DECADES.
I'm a little overwhelmed because it the default, go to, OMNIPRESENT flavor of scifi and I can't fucking taste anything else.
I'm disappointed because I like stories and I like those stories. I just can't stand them anymore.
It's like having the same piece of gum in your mouth for 30 years.
This.
Also, too much CGI makes the damn thing too busy to enjoy.
I hate Star Wars.
The license is being dramatically overused, but there are some gems. The expanded universe, for one. Then there are several thoroughly impressive Star Wars video games. But I do agree... it is getting a little old a little fast. The The original trilogy was great and deserved to be a cultural thing, but the latest three are all kind of obnoxious cash grabs that only 12 year olds really enjoy.
However, Republic Commando was a great game based off of the later trilogy.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on June 23, 2011, 07:08:00 PM
Quote from: Your Evil Stepmother on June 23, 2011, 07:02:22 PM
I hate Star Wars.
Me too. Especially the goddamn Romulans.
No, no, those were in Battlestar Galactica. You're thinking of the Vogons.
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
You think Star Wars is immune to a series reboot? It would be an awful idea, but after Lucas kicks it, I bet our grandkids will watch a new A New Hope in theaters.
Quote from: Cramulus on June 23, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
:crankey:
So long, Space Opera, hello CGI.
:horrormirth: :vom: :horrormirth:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Something to look forward to hateshitting on. I suppose.
Like the Mitt Romney Administration.
Quote from: Cramulus on June 23, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
You think Star Wars is immune to a series reboot? It would be an awful idea, but after Lucas kicks it, I bet our grandkids will watch a new A New Hope in theaters.
I just threw up in my mouth a little.
They could have Matt Damon play Luke. And Sean Connery could play Obi Wan.
And Paris Hilton could play Princess Leia.
Five bucks says they'll add a Scrappy (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheScrappy).
It'll be Darker and Edgier.
Which, as always, basically means more sex and corpses.
Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2011, 07:30:23 PM
It'll be Darker and Edgier.
Which, as always, basically means more sex and corpses.
Hopefully not in the same scene.
Apparently you've never read the books.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on June 23, 2011, 07:29:17 PM
Five bucks says they'll add a Scrappy (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheScrappy).
Of course. That's why they added Ewoks, and later on the dude with the floppy ears.
This time around, they'll add some sort of telepathic cat, easyly rendered into merchandise.
I was thinking more along the lines of a Short Round:
(http://static.reelmovienews.com/images/gallery/willie-short-round.jpg)
Quote from: Your Evil Stepmother on June 23, 2011, 07:32:11 PM
Apparently you've never read the books.
Apparently not!
I read like two or three of them. Couldn't tell you which ones though, other than the Suncrusher was involved, as were Force Witches.
Quote from: Cramulus on June 23, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
You think Star Wars is immune to a series reboot? It would be an awful idea, but after Lucas kicks it, I bet our grandkids will watch a new A New Hope in theaters.
Justin Bieber as Luke Skywalker.
I called it first.
Quote from: Idem on June 23, 2011, 07:54:45 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on June 23, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
You think Star Wars is immune to a series reboot? It would be an awful idea, but after Lucas kicks it, I bet our grandkids will watch a new A New Hope in theaters.
Justin Bieber as Luke Skywalker.
I called it first.
I will go right the fuck up a watertower. You see if I fucking don't.
Really, the only great movie of the whole thing is A New Hope.
Empire and Jedi are both awesome, but they are only awesome in context, they're only good because it's a completion of the story and a richer universe as they develop. But as a stand alone, fantastic movie, Star Wars itself was Lucas' accidental masterpiece.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 23, 2011, 07:56:33 PM
Quote from: Idem on June 23, 2011, 07:54:45 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on June 23, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
You think Star Wars is immune to a series reboot? It would be an awful idea, but after Lucas kicks it, I bet our grandkids will watch a new A New Hope in theaters.
Justin Bieber as Luke Skywalker.
I called it first.
I will go right the fuck up a watertower. You see if I fucking don't.
And I will take a razor blade to my tattoos.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on June 23, 2011, 07:57:43 PM
Really, the only great movie of the whole thing is A New Hope.
Empire and Jedi are both awesome, but they are only awesome in context, they're only good because it's a completion of the story and a richer universe as they develop. But as a stand alone, fantastic movie, Star Wars itself was Lucas' accidental masterpiece.
Surely you meant to say Empire Strikes Back. Surely.
I still have a soft spot for the original trilogy. I mean the original, original before Lucas molested it with computers. I don't care if I can see the strings on the puppets. I don't care if Han shot first. I don't care if the original explosions didn't have gigantic rings around them, it was fine the fucking way it fucking was.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 23, 2011, 07:56:33 PM
Quote from: Idem on June 23, 2011, 07:54:45 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on June 23, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
You think Star Wars is immune to a series reboot? It would be an awful idea, but after Lucas kicks it, I bet our grandkids will watch a new A New Hope in theaters.
Justin Bieber as Luke Skywalker.
I called it first.
I will go right the fuck up a watertower. You see if I fucking don't.
It's not like he has to act or anything. It would be his "thrilling debut" into the Hollywood scene.
The 1997 edit of Return of the Jedi makes me punch infants. Seriously, editing out Sy's riveting rendition of Lapti Pek with that mid 90s CGI bullshit? I threw gummy bears at the screen.
The 2004 DVD edit of it makes me want to claw my eyes out.
The ONLY edit that is allowed to pass is Empire Strikes Back, and that's because they replaced the original actor for the Emperor with Ian McDiarmid, which at least makes sense, but Hayden Christensen does not belong in Return of the Jedi.
LOTR is the king of the big fantasy trilogies anyway. It's still possible for Peter Jackson to pull a Lucas and shame the franchise with some lame prequels, but I have faith he will get the job done.
I really hope you're right. There's so much money in the Hobbit that it feels like they couldn't not fuck it up. As long as Jackson gets to call all the shots, I think it'll be okay.
Quote from: R.W.H.N. on June 23, 2011, 08:49:48 PM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on June 23, 2011, 07:57:43 PM
Really, the only great movie of the whole thing is A New Hope.
Empire and Jedi are both awesome, but they are only awesome in context, they're only good because it's a completion of the story and a richer universe as they develop. But as a stand alone, fantastic movie, Star Wars itself was Lucas' accidental masterpiece.
Surely you meant to say Empire Strikes Back. Surely.
I still have a soft spot for the original trilogy. I mean the original, original before Lucas molested it with computers. I don't care if I can see the strings on the puppets. I don't care if Han shot first. I don't care if the original explosions didn't have gigantic rings around them, it was fine the fucking way it fucking was.
Nope!
Aside from its overall strength as a single movie, A New Hope has one of my favorite movie moments of all time, too. Luke standing on the ruins of his family's farm on Tatooine silhouetted by the two suns as the music plays. If you add up the Battle of Hoth, Vader's reveal, Luke's NOOOO, Jabba's Palace, the final confrontation, anything, they do not add up to that one single moment.
The best part of A New Hope is how Obi-wan describes the Imperial Stormtroopers as the finest marksmen in the Galaxy.
I still cry a bit during the final confrontation. I can't help it, the minute Luke stands up and goes, "DARTH!" That's it. Ang gets all teary-eyed, like she has no idea wtf is about to happen even though I've seen every movie backwards, forwards, and in Japanese thousands of times. Or, the first time you hear Pops go "Lock S-Foils in attack position." when they approach the Death Star at Yavin 4. Or the way the Rebels stand and wait for the walkers on Hoth. You know they're coming, but you can't see them yet, but you can hear them. That part is fucking brilliant.
The prequels have their gold too, but not in the same way. The Phantom Menace had the magic of being the first Star Wars movie in a generation, and I don't care what anyone says about that movie, but when Darth Maul activates that double lightsaber, my 16 year old soul shits fucking bricks. Every time. When I watch Attack of the Clones, I still see my 19 year old self sitting on the curb, head in hands outside of the theatre, wondering WTF I just saw and why it was so bad, but then remember seeing an all-digital movie for the first time, and the power that special effects like that had in scenes like Kamino, or the seismic charges when Obi Wan was in pursuit of the Fetts toward Geonosis, and with Revenge of the Sith, the way the chill went down your back when you heard James Earl Jones as Vader in the last minutes of the film.
I haven't watched a whole lot of the Clone Wars, mostly because I don't have cable. At first, I was skeptical, figuring it was juvenile and just reaching out merchandise to the kids, but after watching a few selected episodes with Dartmouth Fett, I was like, "Wait...that was way more violent than a kid's show should be." And he went, "That's because it's not for kids." We were watching clones getting blown to bits and decapitated. It was gruesome. It was total war! Yeah, there's some annoying fluff episodes in there, but between the 1st and 2nd seasons, shit got darker, this newest season is REALLY dark. It's only a matter of time now. We all know Ahsoka's going bye bye, but no one knows why or how just yet.
It's there, the magic is still there, you just have to find it, and I can guarantee it's not in the action figure section at Wal-Mart. (This coming from a girl who collects only Droidekas and B-Wings.)
Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2011, 09:52:40 PM
The best part of A New Hope is how Obi-wan describes the Imperial Stormtroopers as the finest marksmen in the Galaxy.
It's the E-11s. Everyone knows that. :roll:
Suu, I've got to back you up on the Clone wars show. It's much darker than I expected, and some of the things they're doing with environments and combat choreography CD gives me that old-school Star-Wars "WTF is THIS! It's AWESOME!" chills.
Quote from: Your Evil Stepmother on June 23, 2011, 10:05:20 PM
I still cry a bit during the final confrontation. I can't help it, the minute Luke stands up and goes, "DARTH!" That's it. Ang gets all teary-eyed, like she has no idea wtf is about to happen even though I've seen every movie backwards, forwards, and in Japanese thousands of times.
Considering the word "Darth" is an honorific title and not his actual name, doesn't that strike you as odd?
I find your lack of faith disturbing!
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW!
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on June 24, 2011, 01:02:25 PM
Quote from: Your Evil Stepmother on June 23, 2011, 10:05:20 PM
I still cry a bit during the final confrontation. I can't help it, the minute Luke stands up and goes, "DARTH!" That's it. Ang gets all teary-eyed, like she has no idea wtf is about to happen even though I've seen every movie backwards, forwards, and in Japanese thousands of times.
Considering the word "Darth" is an honorific title and not his actual name, doesn't that strike you as odd?
No.
We yell, 'MY LORD!' when we try to get their attention when fighting, and well, yelling 'DARTH!' sounds better than yelling 'VADER!' in movie sense.
I saw the originals on VHS before any of the edits came in and pooped on everything, afaik. I didn't even know they had made edited versions until recently, and looking at clips of where they inserted CGI made me sad.
I always was more of an Indiana Jones kid, even if I only ever saw the first and third ones (discounting the weird... thing they called a fourth movie).
What I did like about the Special Editions is that they re-released them in theaters so I got to see all of the originals in a theater. I was a bit young, and lived in a shitty, small town so I didn't get to see the original releases in movie theaters.
My parents' first date was to go see Empire Strikes Back.
Remarkably, it was also a notable first date for Homer and Marge Simpson.
I saw Return of the Jedi in the theater when it first came out.
Even at the tender age of 6 I knew it was crap. Fucking ewoks? Really? Choke on 6 miles of dick, George Lucas.
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on June 24, 2011, 04:04:21 PM
I saw Return of the Jedi in the theater when it first came out.
Even at the tender age of 6 I knew it was crap. Fucking ewoks? Really? Choke on 6 miles of dick, George Lucas.
Dunno if this is true, but the original plot called for a planet of wookies, but it got spielberged.
In my mind, there is a Wookie Cavalry.
My mind is currently a much better place than reality.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 24, 2011, 04:07:15 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on June 24, 2011, 04:04:21 PM
I saw Return of the Jedi in the theater when it first came out.
Even at the tender age of 6 I knew it was crap. Fucking ewoks? Really? Choke on 6 miles of dick, George Lucas.
Dunno if this is true, but the original plot called for a planet of wookies, but it got spielberged.
That's the rumor I heard too.
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Wookiee#Behind_the_scenes
QuoteWookiees were present in the Star Wars saga from George Lucas's earliest drafts. In many early versions of the story which eventually became A New Hope, a crucial battle takes place on a planet full of Wookiees. This idea resurfaced in early versions of Return of the Jedi, though Ewoks would be used instead - in a DVD commentary, Lucas stated that he changed this because he couldn't reconcile the "primitive", Stone-Age race needed for the story with Chewbacca's strong technological know-how. (Note that the name Ewok is Wookiee with the syllables reversed.) In Revenge of the Sith, the long-awaited Wookiee army finally appeared on screen.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 24, 2011, 04:07:15 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on June 24, 2011, 04:04:21 PM
I saw Return of the Jedi in the theater when it first came out.
Even at the tender age of 6 I knew it was crap. Fucking ewoks? Really? Choke on 6 miles of dick, George Lucas.
Dunno if this is true, but the original plot called for a planet of wookies, but it got spielberged.
I've heard this too and I'm pretty certain it came from the horse's mouth. I seem to remember Lucas or some producer mentioning it in one of the commentary sections on one of the editions on DVD. I think they more or less admitted that they switched to Ewoks to appeal to kids. Yeah, basically what Canis just posted.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 24, 2011, 04:07:15 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on June 24, 2011, 04:04:21 PM
I saw Return of the Jedi in the theater when it first came out.
Even at the tender age of 6 I knew it was crap. Fucking ewoks? Really? Choke on 6 miles of dick, George Lucas.
Dunno if this is true, but the original plot called for a planet of wookies, but it got spielberged.
Yes. They were supposed to be on Kashyyyk and not Endor.
Are you saying that Johnny Cochran's Chewbacca Defense wouldn't really work???
:suu:
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on June 24, 2011, 04:48:13 PM
Are you saying that Johnny Cochran's Chewbacca Defense wouldn't really work???
I read somewhere that F. Lee Bailey wanted to use the Ewok Defense. His words were, and I quote, "It would be much more Wicket!"
:crankey:
Quote from: Idem on June 23, 2011, 07:54:45 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on June 23, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
You think Star Wars is immune to a series reboot? It would be an awful idea, but after Lucas kicks it, I bet our grandkids will watch a new A New Hope in theaters.
Justin Bieber as Luke Skywalker.
I called it first.
No, Justin Bieber as Han Solo.
And he'll always shoot second.
Quote from: Cramulus on June 23, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
Alty, you know what I can't wait for?
the day that they decide to REMAKE the originals.
You think Star Wars is immune to a series reboot? It would be an awful idea, but after Lucas kicks it, I bet our grandkids will watch a new A New Hope in theaters.
And then
The Force Awakens happened.
Luckily, TFA was a good movie.
Quote from: LMNO on July 12, 2018, 09:29:04 PM
Luckily, TFA was a good movie.
But it was still a reboot.
True.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 12, 2018, 09:31:39 PM
Quote from: LMNO on July 12, 2018, 09:29:04 PM
Luckily, TFA was a good movie.
But it was still a reboot.
Which is fine IMO, because The Last Jedi was very much
not a reboot and it made a bunch of wieners really, really mad. This is made even better by the fact that it was actually excellent.
Currently 46% audience approval on Rotten Tomatoes vs 91% critical approval. A huge chunk of that is review-bombing by trolls, but still. Watching the total failure of some people to tolerate a deconstruction of their cultivated identity has been a joy.
(here's where I got the term "cultivated identity": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9Lf1GcG5M4)
TFA was meh.
TLJ was actually good, though fuck me if it took some time to get there. The showdown between Kylo Ren and Luke Skywalker was worth the price of admission.
Quote from: Cain on July 13, 2018, 10:32:43 AM
TFA was meh.
TLJ was actually good, though fuck me if it took some time to get there. The showdown between Kylo Ren and Luke Skywalker was worth the price of admission.
Also worthwhile was the moment that Yoda mindfucks Luke (and the audience) by burning down the sacred tree they kept the Jedi books in, knowing, I presume, that they had already been stolen.
Personally I think it would have been cooler if the books had been burned too. I take my iconoclasm seriously.
Quote from: Cain on July 13, 2018, 10:32:43 AM
TFA was meh.
TLJ was actually good, though fuck me if it took some time to get there. The showdown between Kylo Ren and Luke Skywalker was worth the price of admission.
No doubt, TLJ's biggest sin is its pacing, which kind of sucks.
I am constantly flabbergasted by people who think Luke's character was mishandled or done a disservice by the film, though. What they did was so much better than anything I'd have come up with.