Discordian Monotheism: I believe in Eris, in the sense that she is a cosmic entity outside of me that I sometimes hang with. There is no Goddess but Eris and she is my Goddess.
Discordian Polytheism: Eris is just one of several Gods I roll with.
Discordian Atheism: I don't believe in Cosmic Superbeings. Eris is a metaphor who I think is cool.
Discordian Agnosticism: I identify with the concept of Eris, but I don't think we can know whether Eris/Gods are real or not.
What is this list missing?
Discordian Situationism: Whether or not I behave in a manner consistent with a genuine belief in either the existence or metaphorical meaning of Eris depends on my current circumstances.
Discordian Gnostic Agnostic: Eris? WHO NEEDS HER?
Discordian Pantheism: Eris is the Universe (we're all fucked. Especially you).
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 15, 2011, 03:00:22 PM
Discordian Gnostic Agnostic: Eris? WHO NEEDS HER?
:lol:
*puts on his straight face*actually I kinda like that term
Gnosticism includes this idea that there is a spiritual world hidden behind this one, but we forget that we are a part of it because we're distracted by the corrupt material world.
So Discordian Gnosticism suggests that Primal Chaos lies hidden behind all things, but we don't see it because we're distracted by the illusions of order and disorder. (see also: like 30% of the Chao Te Ching)
So Discordian Agnostic Gnosticism suggests that there
might be primal chaos hidden behind all things, but we can't really know because how-can-you-know-chaos, and also the word Chaos is just a metaphor we use to try to understand things
and that in itself is misleading.
Discordian Maltheism: Eris is a real goddess, and boy, she really doesn't like you.
Discordian Henotheism: Eris exists. So do other gods. But those other gods suck, I'm sticking with Eris.
Discordian Apatheism: I don't care if Eris exists or not.
Discordian Deism: Eris created the Universe, in order to confuse physicists, but has since retired and/or is involved in the creation of other Universes.
Discordian Transtheism: Eris is something to surpass.
Discordian Schizoism - Any of the above but ask me again after lunch if that answer isn't good enough.
Discordian Nihilism - Eris exists, but only during the fertile months and exclusively on the banks of the river Nile.
Discordian Implication If there is a god, it's Eris
I'm misquoting that from somewhere, I'm not sure where.
Discordian Ignosticism: Define God, please. If I'm happy with that definition, then I'll believe in Eris. If I'm not, then the whole question is meaningless.
Quote from: Faust on September 15, 2011, 03:58:42 PM
Discordian Schizoism - Any of the above but ask me again after lunch if that answer isn't good enough.
Discordian Nihilism - Eris exists, but only during the fertile months and exclusively on the banks of the river Nile.
:hashishim:
Discordian Pantyism: Only into Discordianism for the chicks and getting in their panties.
Discordian Maltism: Finding Eris exists at the bottom of really good beers.
Discordian Apothecarism: PILLS HERE
Discordian Buddhism: Eris does/doesn't exist. Are we talking the ultimate level or the relative level?
Discordian New Agism Ya, ya... fairy wood spirits... whatever... Can I get laid now?
Discordian SubGeniusism: Eris is the only being that "Bob" acknowledges above and beyond himself, except when he doesn't. Which is probably more often than is strictly healthy.
Discordian Discordianism: If anyone actually succeeded in practicing this, we'd probably be able to tell by the spontaneous formation of a quantum singularity inside their skull.
Discordian Scientology - Tell people how they have been living their lives wrong, win fabulous prizes.
Discordian Scientology II - Xenu brought billions of his people to earth in a spaceship shaped like a DC-8, piloted by Eris.
Quantum Discordianism: Fucks with yuor shit when you're not observing it.
This thread is amazing.
Nondenominational Discordianism: Box next to the word "Other"
Discospagism: Only in it for the asshatery.
Pentecostal Discordianism You can handle deadly serpents and drink poison. However, you will more than likely die from doing so and Eris will laugh at you.
Calvinist Discordianism You have slack because Eris elected you to have slack. Greyfaces and cabbages are the unelect. It's no coincidence that Calvinism has 5 points.
Quote from: Cramulus on September 15, 2011, 02:52:29 PM
Discordian Monotheism: I believe in Eris, in the sense that she is a cosmic entity outside of me that I sometimes hang with. There is no Goddess but Eris and she is my Goddess.
Discordian Polytheism: Eris is just one of several Gods I roll with.
Discordian Atheism: I don't believe in Cosmic Superbeings. Eris is a metaphor who I think is cool.
Discordian Agnosticism: I identify with the concept of Eris, but I don't think we can know whether Eris/Gods are real or not.
What is this list missing?
Wait, there are people who actually believe in Eris as a literal extant entity? :lulz:
:lulz:
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Quote from: Fuck You One-Eye on September 15, 2011, 11:23:45 PM
Wait, there are people who actually believe in Eris as a literal extant entity? :lulz:
Rev. Dr. Occupant and Mad Malik/Sinister Dexter do. Now all you have to do is believe in them as literal extant entities.
I believe in them as literal extant retards. :lulz:
Discordian Militant Peaceable Subjectivism:
(http://i209.photobucket.com/albums/bb163/wompcabal/forum/youropinionmanlebowski.jpg)
Discordian Vegitarianism:
(http://i209.photobucket.com/albums/bb163/wompcabal/forum/brochead.png)
Discordian Judaism: Holidays can last up to a week.
Methodist Discordian: We have all these rules but you don't really have to follow them.
Discordian Jehovah's Witnesses: Knock on doors. PosterGASM the porch and run like hell.
Discordian Priapism: :fap:
Discordian Accordionism
(http://i.imgur.com/Bf7MU.jpg)
This thread is so :lulz:
Discordian Hedonism :uday::hi5::a2m::hi5::boot:
Discordian Meliorism PPPFFFFFFFFFF! YEAH RIGHT!
Discordian Objectivism
(http://www.amoeba.com/dynamic-images/blog/Charles/anton-lavey.gif)
Discordian Elitism http://www.principiadiscordia.com :mrgreen:
Discordian Racism
(http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/NewAvatars/avatar_627.png)
Quote from: Jenkem and SPACE/TIME on September 15, 2011, 10:47:32 PM
This thread is amazing.
Nondenominational Discordianism: Box next to the word "Other"
Discospagism: Only in it for the asshatery.
YOIKED!!!!!!
DIS FREAD IS
DISCODILDOSISM :fap:
Quote from: Donald Coyote on September 18, 2011, 09:49:44 PM
DIS FREAD IS
DISCODILDOSISM :fap:
SSSSSHHHHHHHHH.... we don't talk about Empress Nigel's Dildos of Destruction.
And of course,
Really Real Discordianism: The details of this obnoxious faith are unknown to outsiders, but it is clear that for every Discordian there is at least one of these to tell them they're wrong.
Raelli Rael Discordianism: This elite group of scientists know the truth about all of life's origins: extraterrestrials. Raelli Rael Discordians want you to know that not only do they look down on you for being against human cloning but so do the Elohim, from their shiny, silent spaceships.
Rlyeh real discordians: Not only are life's origins extraterrestrial but extradimensional and terrifying. One day the sleeping old ones will rise and the world of man shall come to an end, devoured in the fires of great cthulhu, MAY THE RATS EAT YOUR EYES, DAMN YOU BELIEVE ME, WE ARE INVADED .... Bzt..... (unintelligible)....
Baptist Discordianism - Long, boring sermons followed by potluck supper.
Discordian Taoism: Whatever.
Discordian absolutism: Everything is Discordia, even those things that are not; all mortals must die with "Hail Eris" on their lips
Discordian agapism: Everyone loves Discordia, all love children are named Eris
Discordian authotheism: The belief that Discordia makes people Godlike or Eris incarnate
Discordian capitalism: you can privately own enough chaos to make an economy work; aka The Koch Brothers Doctrine
Discordian bullionism: belief that golden apples are the way solve all economic evils
Discordian experientialism: believing that the experiencing Discord brings you the knowledge you are well and truly fucked
Discordian hedonism: belief that pleasure in chaos is the highest good; i.e. The Joker Doctrine
Discordiain ignorantism: doctrine that ignorance of Discord is not only no excuse but also highly likely
Discordian naturalism: belief that the world can be explained through chaotic forces; i.e. Daddy tell me a bedtime story about Eris
loving these
Some of these sound like they may actually be worth dissecting and discussing in depth.. is that weird or what? :lulz:
Discordian Eroticism: Eris exists, and I want to do her.
Discordian Elitism- Mired in Cartesian Duality
Discordian Traveller- a traditionally nomadic people of ethnic Irish origin, who maintain a separate language and set of rules. Rumors have them around Jonesboro, Arkansas in a mobile home park.
you're talking about pope oldboy floats, right? :lol:
Quote from: Cramulus on September 20, 2011, 09:05:40 PM
you're talking about pope oldboy floats, right? :lol:
hes on okcupid if you ever get bored
Quote from: Cramulus on September 20, 2011, 02:43:28 PM
loving these
Some of these sound like they may actually be worth dissecting and discussing in depth.. is that weird or what? :lulz:
Agreed. I'm especially intrigued by this concept:
Quote from: Jenne on September 20, 2011, 04:20:24 AM
Discordian naturalism: belief that the world can be explained through chaotic forces; i.e. Daddy tell me a bedtime story about Eris
I think some of the old Greeks like Heraclitus were on their way to something like that but most of his stuff is lost in time.
Quote from: Iason Ouabache on September 21, 2011, 12:48:14 AM
Quote from: Cramulus on September 20, 2011, 02:43:28 PM
loving these
Some of these sound like they may actually be worth dissecting and discussing in depth.. is that weird or what? :lulz:
Agreed. I'm especially intrigued by this concept:
Quote from: Jenne on September 20, 2011, 04:20:24 AM
Discordian naturalism: belief that the world can be explained through chaotic forces; i.e. Daddy tell me a bedtime story about Eris
I think some of the old Greeks like Heraclitus were on their way to something like that but most of his stuff is lost in flames of the Alexandrian Library.
Fixed. Also, that's chaos for you. :lulz:
Discordian Trollocaust- Incorporating the lulz IRL.
Discordian Epicurianism: A philosophy that considers Slack to be the highest good and that advocates the pursuit of pleasures through chaos.
Discordian Sufism: Call me Ishmael
Discordian Juggaloism: We might believe in Eris, if we read the book. But fuck that; it's got PAGES of text. MMFWCL
Quote from: trix on November 23, 2011, 04:26:59 AM
Discordian Juggaloism: We might believe in Eris, if we read the book. But fuck that; it's got PAGES of text. MMFWCL
Fucking apples. How do they work?
Quote from: Nph. Twid. on November 23, 2011, 05:06:37 AM
Quote from: trix on November 23, 2011, 04:26:59 AM
Discordian Juggaloism: We might believe in Eris, if we read the book. But fuck that; it's got PAGES of text. MMFWCL
Fucking apples. How do they work?
:lulz: YES I like yours much better.
Pragmatic Discordianism: No matter how exclusive you make the invites, Lady Discord will always show up to your party in one form or another. The pragmatic Discordian looks for ways to make the best of it (as opposed to pretending she doesn't exist or erecting "No Drama Permitted" signs.)
Pessimistic Discordian: Everything is false, meaningless, or inconsistent in some sense.
Optimistic Discordianism: Everything is false, meaningless, or inconsistent in some sense, especially Pessimistic Discordianism.
Quote from: Nph. Twid. on November 23, 2011, 05:06:37 AM
Quote from: trix on November 23, 2011, 04:26:59 AM
Discordian Juggaloism: We might believe in Eris, if we read the book. But fuck that; it's got PAGES of text. MMFWCL
Fucking apples. How do they work?
Heeeeee!
Discordian Positivism: is an oxymoron
Discordian Gödelism: the belief that Discordian Gödelism is false.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
I agree Cram, some of these seem worth deeper discussion!
The rest seem worthy of deeper LULZ
Maybe an Intermittens themed around this?
Quote from: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on November 24, 2011, 11:45:10 AM
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
I agree Cram, some of these seem worth deeper discussion!
The rest seem worthy of deeper LULZ
Maybe an Intermittens themed around this?
We have a stack of content for a 2011 in review and a meetup edition. We need an editor and were back in business.
Quote from: Placid Dingo on November 24, 2011, 11:51:22 AM
Quote from: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on November 24, 2011, 11:45:10 AM
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
I agree Cram, some of these seem worth deeper discussion!
The rest seem worthy of deeper LULZ
Maybe an Intermittens themed around this?
We have a stack of content for a 2011 in review and a meetup edition. We need an editor and were back in business.
Well, I'm not doing much these days...
http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=30592.15
Quote from: Bu☆ns on September 16, 2011, 07:38:46 AM
Discordian Objectivism
(http://www.amoeba.com/dynamic-images/blog/Charles/anton-lavey.gif)
HAAAA!
Anatidist Discordianism: (http://i205.photobucket.com/albums/bb91/kamikazejkd/Duckroll.png)
Quote from: trix on November 23, 2011, 05:22:45 AM
Quote from: Nph. Twid. on November 23, 2011, 05:06:37 AM
Quote from: trix on November 23, 2011, 04:26:59 AM
Discordian Juggaloism: We might believe in Eris, if we read the book. But fuck that; it's got PAGES of text. MMFWCL
Fucking apples. How do they work?
:lulz: YES I like yours much better.
:thanks:
Discordian Machiavellianism: manipulating the sheep for fun and profit
Discordian Rastafarianism: Discordia-I is cool lya.
Discordian Tantrism: Without Eris there's no enlightenment, and every woman is Eris.
Discordian Hinayana: Create your own personal chaos.
Discordian Mahayana: Create chaos for everyone else then for your own self.
Discordian Pandeism: Eris created the universe, and in so doing became it. Guess we're really fucked now!
Discordian Bagpiping: Scotland the Brave, John Cage edition.
Discordian Authoritarianism: We're doing chaos MY WAY!
Eris' Witnesses: Eris is throwing a giant party, the guest list is full. Her followers are required to go from door to door with this important message.
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on December 20, 2011, 01:22:04 AM
Eris' Witnesses: Eris is throwing a giant party, the guest list is full. Her followers are required to go from door to door with this important message.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on December 20, 2011, 01:22:04 AM
Eris' Witnesses: Eris is throwing a giant party, the guest list is full. Her followers are required to go from door to door with this important message.
Oh hey!
I like this one. Quite a lot. I would like to make promotional brochures for this and do some door-to-dooring with other people who can keep a straight face.
ECH and Telarus, in suits? Maybe in MY Discordia!
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on December 20, 2011, 01:22:04 AM
Eris' Witnesses: Eris is throwing a giant party, the guest list is full. Her followers are required to go from door to door with this important message.
This is goooood. "When Chaos begins, please stay behind the velvet rope."
Quote from: Nigel on December 20, 2011, 07:04:39 AM
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on December 20, 2011, 01:22:04 AM
Eris' Witnesses: Eris is throwing a giant party, the guest list is full. Her followers are required to go from door to door with this important message.
Oh hey!
I like this one. Quite a lot. I would like to make promotional brochures for this and do some door-to-dooring with other people who can keep a straight face.
ECH and Telarus, in suits? Maybe in MY Discordia!
This is pretty good. Especially because of the idea of Eris snubbing everyone else.
Greek Discordian: It's pronounced Aries!
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on December 20, 2011, 01:22:04 AM
Eris' Witnesses: Eris is throwing a giant party, the guest list is full. Her followers are required to go from door to door with this important message.
Very nice.
Quote from: Doktor Zero on December 22, 2011, 02:16:53 AM
Quote from: Rev. Potzilla on December 22, 2011, 02:00:06 AM
Greek Discordian: It's pronounced Aries!
I don't get it.
:lol:
I still pronounce it "AEris" instead of "AirEEEs" sometimes (which I've heard on a RAW recording)... is that what Potzilla was on about?
Quote from: Telarus on December 22, 2011, 06:19:58 AM
I still pronounce it "AEris" instead of "AirEEEs" sometimes (which I've heard on a RAW recording)... is that what Potzilla was on about?
Technically, it should be pronounced with pre-vowel shift pronunciation, (i.e. Ehrees, compared to Ares which would be Ahrays). I have no idea what Potzilla is on.
ETA: slight correction, as I confused the spellings.
Discordian Humanist: Whatever shite Eris has in store for us, I'm with the evolved apes.
bump!
Here's the whole set, compiled into one awesome post
Discordianism can be hard to understand. Let's clear up the confusion surrounding the various types of Discordia:
Discordian Monotheism: I believe in Eris, in the sense that she is a cosmic entity outside of me that I sometimes hang with. There is no Goddess but Eris and she is my Goddess.
Discordian Polytheism: Eris is just one of several Gods I roll with.
Discordian Atheism: I don't believe in Cosmic Superbeings. Eris is a metaphor who I think is cool.
Discordian Agnosticism: I identify with the concept of Eris, but I don't think we can know whether Eris/Gods are real or not.
Discordian Situationism: Whether or not I behave in a manner consistent with a genuine belief in either the existence or metaphorical meaning of Eris depends on my current circumstances.
Discordian Gnostic Agnostic: Eris? WHO NEEDS HER?
Discordian Pantheism: Eris is the Universe (we're all fucked. Especially you).
Discordian Maltheism: Eris is a real goddess, and boy, she really doesn't like you.
Discordian Henotheism: Eris exists. So do other gods. But those other gods suck, I'm sticking with Eris.
Discordian Apatheism: I don't care if Eris exists or not.
Discordian Deism: Eris created the Universe, in order to confuse physicists, but has since retired and/or is involved in the creation of other Universes.
Discordian Transtheism: Eris is something to surpass.
Discordian Schizoism: Any of the above but ask me again after lunch if that answer isn't good enough.
Discordian Nihilism: Eris exists, but only during the fertile months and exclusively on the banks of the river Nile.
Discordian Implication: If there is a god, it's Eris
Discordian Ignosticism: Define God, please. If I'm happy with that definition, then I'll believe in Eris. If I'm not, then the whole question is meaningless.
Discordian Pantyism: Only into Discordianism for the chicks and getting in their panties.
Discordian Maltism: Finding Eris exists at the bottom of really good beers.
Discordian Apothecarism: PILLS HERE
Discordian New Agism: Ya, ya... fairy wood spirits... whatever... Can I get laid now?
Discordian SubGeniusism: Eris is the only being that "Bob" acknowledges above and beyond himself, except when he doesn't. Which is probably more often than is strictly healthy.
Discordian Discordianism: If anyone actually succeeded in practicing this, we'd probably be able to tell by the spontaneous formation of a quantum singularity inside their skull.
Discordian Scientology: Tell people how they have been living their lives wrong, win fabulous prizes.
Discordian Scientology II: Xenu brought billions of his people to earth in a spaceship shaped like a DC-8, piloted by Eris.
Quantum Discordianism: Fucks with yuor shit when you're not observing it.
Nondenominational Discordianism: Box next to the word "Other"
Discospagism: Only in it for the asshatery.
Pentecostal Discordianism: You can handle deadly serpents and drink poison. However, you will more than likely die from doing so and Eris will laugh at you.
Calvinist Discordianism: You have slack because Eris elected you to have slack. Greyfaces and cabbages are the unelect. It's no coincidence that Calvinism has 5 points.
Methodist Discordian: We have all these rules but you don't really have to follow them.
Really Real Discordianism: The details of this obnoxious faith are unknown to outsiders, but it is clear that for every Discordian there is at least one of these to tell them they're wrong.
Raelli Rael Discordianism: This elite group of scientists know the truth about all of life's origins: extraterrestrials. Raelli Rael Discordians want you to know that not only do they look down on you for being against human cloning but so do the Elohim, from their shiny, silent spaceships.
Rlyeh real discordians: Not only are life's origins extraterrestrial but extradimensional and terrifying. One day the sleeping old ones will rise and the world of man shall come to an end, devoured in the fires of great cthulhu, MAY THE RATS EAT YOUR EYES, DAMN YOU BELIEVE ME, WE ARE INVADED .... Bzt..... (unintelligible)....
Baptist Discordianism - Long, boring sermons followed by potluck supper.
Discordian absolutism: Everything is Discordia, even those things that are not; all mortals must die with "Hail Eris" on their lips
Discordian agapism: Everyone loves Discordia, all love children are named Eris
Discordian authotheism: The belief that Discordia makes people Godlike or Eris incarnate
Discordian capitalism: you can privately own enough chaos to make an economy work; aka The Koch Brothers Doctrine
Discordian bullionism: belief that golden apples are the way solve all economic evils
Discordian experientialism: believing that the experiencing Discord brings you the knowledge you are well and truly fucked
Discordian hedonism: belief that pleasure in chaos is the highest good; i.e. The Joker Doctrine
Discordiain ignorantism: doctrine that ignorance of Discord is not only no excuse but also highly likely
Discordian naturalism: belief that the world can be explained through chaotic forces; i.e. Daddy tell me a bedtime story about Eris
Discordian Eroticism: Eris exists, and I want to do her.
Discordian Epicurianism: A philosophy that considers Slack to be the highest good and that advocates the pursuit of pleasures through chaos.
Pragmatic Discordianism: No matter how exclusive you make the invites, Lady Discord will always show up to your party in one form or another. The pragmatic Discordian looks for ways to make the best of it (as opposed to pretending she doesn't exist or erecting "No Drama Permitted" signs.)
Pessimistic Discordian: Everything is false, meaningless, or inconsistent in some sense.
Optimistic Discordianism: Everything is false, meaningless, or inconsistent in some sense, especially Pessimistic Discordianism.
Discordian Gödelism: the belief that Discordian Gödelism is false.
Eris' Witnesses: Eris is throwing a giant party, the guest list is full. Her followers are required to go from door to door with this important message.
credit: Cramulus, Cainad, Doktor Howl, Cain, Faust, el Sjaako, Lenin McCarthy, Triple Zero, Thurnez Isa, Freeky, Precious Moments Zalgo, Iason Ouabache, Epimetheus, AFK, Jenne, Kingyak, Anna Mae Bollocks, Golden Applesauce, rong