Messages

Much to like, here.
* Title: A riff on the Wicked Witch? "How about a little fire, Scarecrow?"
* Whole first paragraph strikes me as win, esp. the bit about Budweiser. That bit might really sink in to a more resistant brain.
* "One can never really appreciate food, heat and security until you've been hungry and cold with the wolves closing in."
* Last sentence is powerful.

In the spirit of constructive criticism, I observe that the first sentence of the second paragraph seems weaker than the surrounding rantiness.

Very nice.

Jesus FROG. That is deeply disturbing.

"Them queers don't need marriage. They can already git married. They just hafta marry someone of t' opposite sex."

This is one of my favorite arguments ever, because it is both technically correct and utterly bogus at the same time.

"Vegetarians can eat at the steak house. They just have to eat steak."

Interestingly enough, I have a dear friend who was heartened in his coming out process by a sympathetic gay character in one of Card's books, though I can't for the life of me remember which one.

That egg foam technique sounds really interesting -- I've never seen it before. Thanks! This sounds delicious.

Chop two parts each of potatoes, sweet potatoes, carrots, parsnips, and pumpkin into large chunks. Add one part each of onion, garlic, and tomato. Toss with olive oil and salt. Roast in the oven at 375-400 degrees for two hours, stirring every half hour, until edges are well caramelized. Mash with butter and pepper (if you add the pepper with the salt, it tends to burn).

In the unlikely event of leftovers, fry 'em up as little pancake thingies.

Protip: cutting up a pumpkin is a pain in the ass, but so worth it. It will take roughly twice as long as you think it will.

Also, make mashed potatoes with the blue ones? And you get a Dr. Seuss side dish.

"Hello, I am an exiled Nigerian Prince..."

(no, rly)

AND I UNDERSTAND YOU WOULD LIKE MY ROUTING NUMBER. OK. IS GOOD.

Best text message I ever received: "I am starving like an orphaned meerkat under the blazing African sun."

This sentiment is surprisingly still common even within countries like the UK.

Earlier this week, the government changed some of the laws concerning spousal homicide.  Namely, they removed the infamous "nagging defence" which essentially meant if your wife (and 9/10 it was used to justify the killing of a wife) had repeatedly annoyed you, your killing of her could result in a lesser sentence than murder would normally allow.

This defence has been totally removed, for wives, husbands, boyfriends, girlfriends, gay, straight, lesbian, polyamorous, monogamous etc.  Its removal applies across the board.

So what have the press reported?

WOMEN CAN NOW LEGALLY MURDER THEIR HUSBANDS.

Seriously, a little move in the way of equality, and people are portraying Harriet Harman, the equality minister, as quite literally a castrating, man-hating Feminazi simply for getting rid of a stupid law that was most commonly used by violent male partners to justify their abuse.

Cheerful! That's fantastic.

So attitudes like this are ceasing to surprise me whatsoever. Interesting, there is a claim that the War on Brown People With Oil Terror has also helped to set back women's rights quite a lot, by increasingly portraying women as weak and helpless before the Rising Islamic Tide.  Its an interesting theory, and explains the fetishization of women's rights in other countries by the right, but not in, you know, the USA or the UK.

I've been musing about that, too, with some friends of mine. The idea of all the '-isms' being connected certainly isn't new, but we're rehashing it right now. Fears of brown people are so often sexualized (the eroticly crazed Mexican, the Black mandingo stallion who can satisfy your white woman the way you never could, etc.), and I surmise that plays a part. You've probably read it, since you've read every-fucking-thing ever, but if not, you might check out the oldie but goodie The Dialectic of Sex, by Shulamith Firestone. Good stuff, if a bit dated in spots. I think she wrote it in 1969 or 1970.

Fuck. Fuckity fucking fucktardery fucked FUCK.

Ok, I'll confess. I don't have a penis. Yep, there, I said it. I do not have a cock, dick, schlong, tube steak, or meat mallet.

Oddly enough? I'm still human.

To the vast majority of you, this isn't a news flash. This rant is not directed at you. For those of you still reeling from this concept being introduced into your worldview, however, sit down. Go ahead. Get comfy. I'll wait. Ready? Ok. Here we go.

Women are people.

Yeah, I know. Shocking, hunh? Here I am, all differently shaped and soft and nice-smelling, and yet insisting that I'm a person just like those blessed by the mighty and sacred phallus. What am I thinking? Have I gone mad? Has the lack of child bearing caused my uterus to wander upwards and strangle my poor female excuse for a brain, thus cursing me with delusions of humanity?

Nope. Just stating the simple facts, kiddies. Chicks are people, too.

Now, I know that this will be harder for some of you to accept than others. The most devout among you will be the most troubled. After all, Jesus had a dick, right? And God must, too, since Adam is made in his image and Eve was just a second generation knock-off of the real thing. Clearly, then, if the divine dangles a dick, a penis proves personhood. If it has a clit, it must submit.

Sadly, that line of reasoning just doesn't adequately support the facts. Women are in nearly every way indistinguishable from real people. We get mad in traffic. We go to the movies. Sometimes, we even like to get naked and roll around with someone else in pursuit of affectionate friction. So, if women are people, then what's the problem?

More specifically, what's the Baptists' fucking problem?

On June 26th, Baptist luminary Bruce Ware warned that them uppity wimmins is at it again. Apparently, women wouldn't get knocked around if they'd just know their place. Yep. Wife beating is all a result of women not submitting to the just and righteous leadership of their masters. Er. Husbands. Sorry about that slip up. Since I'm clearly so prone to mistakes, doubtless caused by my lamentable femininity, let me just allow Dr. Ware to explain it for himself. See, women want to have their way sometimes, which is a sin. And men? Well, they just have to respond somehow. "[H]usbands on their parts, because they're sinners, now respond to that threat to their authority either by being abusive, which is of course one of the ways men can respond when their authority is challenged--or, more commonly, to become passive, acquiescent, and simply not asserting the leadership they ought to as men in their homes and in churches."

Dr. Ware, I have no doubt that you are a chapter and verse man, a man who likes his sources cited. So I have a few chapters and verses to lay on you, complete with citations.

Did you know, Dr. Ware, that the leading cause of of death among pregnant women is homicide? If you're curious, I urge you to check out "Pregnancy-Associated Mortality at the End of the Twentieth Century: Massachusetts, 1990 – 1999," in the  Journal of the American Medical Women's Association, Vol. 57, No. 23, Summer 2002. Quite a bit of interesting reading, there. I'm sure you'll see that in each and every one of those murders, the woman was asking for it by trying to get her own way. Those kooky daughters of Eve! Won't they ever learn?

Here's another little tale of a woman, Dr. Ware, who just didn't understand God's special plan for her and defied her husband. This time, I think I'll let her speak for a change; you can find her story for yourself at www.wadt.org if you'd like to check the facts.

"Hi, my name is E. Im telling my story about being ABUSED, for over 10 years of my life.

When I was first abused I didnt recognize the signs. It started with my daughters father, whom is now deceased from a drug overdose. He would abuse me, call me ugly, all sorts of bad names, fight me, tell me didnt nobody want me. I believed him for years. Because I didnt know better. He would beat me when I did not give him money for drugs and take my money or any anything of value to get the drugs.

Make me have sex with him without my consent most of the time. I was treated for a nervous breakdown. My hair would come out real bad because of my nerves. I was a total wreck. He also tried to kill me."

Silly girl. If she had just submitted to the will of her husband and given him that money to buy drugs when he asked for it, she'd have never had those problems. Leave it to a woman to mess up something that simple! It's all there in the Bible!

And that's just the beginning! Can you belive there are still women bringing this kind of abuse on themselves by their divinely appointed overlords? Those gals! What a hoot!

Just take the example of that Laci Peterson. I mean, her husband didn't want to have children, and she should've let it be. Pressuring him like that! I'm sure that if she'd just let the man be the head of the family as God is the head of the church, she wouldn't have been found floating in San Francisco bay minus her arms, right foot, left leg, and head. Neither would Evelyn Hernandez. And Jessie Marie Davis would probably be all right, too, if she hadn't sassed off.

Asking for it. Every one of us. We just don't understand our place in God's plan, do we? We so stubbornly refuse to be meek, humble, and appealing chattel. We tax our inferior, child-like brains with things outside our mandate. If we'd just concentrate on being wives and mothers, like the Bible teaches, the world would be a second Eden of peace and harmony.

Listen, you shriveled up piece of hyena shit, and listen good. FUCK. YOU. This is the TWENTY FIRST-GODDAMN CENTURY, and the rank medieval BULLSHIT you're peddling has EXPIRED. Fuck your self-righteous certainty. Fuck your unfathomable hardness of heart for blaming the victims of abuse for daring to stand up for themselves. Fuck your hatred. Fuck your fear. Fuck your raging stupidity. Fuck the idea of "affirming male headship in the created order." Fuck the idea that the only way half the entire fucking human race can be rescued from Eve's sin is by being "saved in childbearing." Fuck you and fuck you and FUCK YOU.

You don't get to decide shit for me, monster. You don't get to decide, and neither does your God.

I swear if they get Miley Cyrus to play Janet I will have to kill someone.....

AND I WILL HELP YOU. FOR GREAT JUSTICE.

http://www.variety.com/article/VR1117989391.html?categoryid=13&cs=1

Yep. Remaking Rocky Horror. Oh, that won't go at all poorly.

Look, Rocky is a crappy movie. What saves it is self-aware crappiness and the whole bruhaha surrounding it in midnight showings. This is going to suck harder than Uncle BadTouch at a day care.

This post 100% pedo free! Despite involving the Catholic Church!

Italian monk releases second heavy metal album: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7513571.stm

 

Um. Oops. Sorry. I blame Roger and the power of his contagious hate.

[Troof.]

the only reason bush was elected is because of the american publics refusal to vote for a third party..perhaps teh medias portrayal of who should be voted for helped as well...   Wouldn't nader be good for the americans?

When Nader knew he couldn't get 5% (and thus matching funds for 2004), he should have withdrawn.  He didn't, so he split the vote and let the GOP in...while talking shit about the Dems the whole time.

He did that shit on purpose.  I hope he dies of anal prolapse.

Fuck him.

Troof. Agreed, especially on the prolapse. Unsafe At Any Speed? Good thing. Clean Water Action Project? Good thing. Consumer Project on Technology? Good thing. Handing the goddamn elections to the most paleolithic version of the Republican party ever to make Goldwater look like fucking St. Francis? Unmitigated self-promoting bullshit. He has shit on his own legacy.

THREE TIMES.  I wonder what they have on him?

IIRC, when he was working on the auto industry stuff, some unspecified They hired hookers to try and get him in compromising positions. Maybe he finally took the bait?

Ew. Wrinkly Nader hatesex. I think I need a shower, now. In lye.