Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Two vast and trunkless legs of stone => Topic started by: Triple Zero on June 13, 2011, 12:29:54 AM

Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on June 13, 2011, 12:29:54 AM
Yeah, I always hated on the Beatles by blaming them for Britney Spears.
Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 13, 2011, 02:14:25 AM
Quote from: Cainad on June 13, 2011, 12:06:36 AM
When in gobshitting splutterfuck did The Beatles become "hipsters", for fuck's sake?

In their time you couldn't GET more mainstream than the fucking Beatles.

They were neither Mod nor Rocker!

Also, DF tends to use Hipster and Hippie synonymously. It drives me crazy, but it's not technically wrong. Then again, I think the only person I have ever heard a good reason for not liking the Beatles from ever is ECH, but ECH also listens to good music. All I do is tease the fuck out of DF for his music. He really does listen to everything, though. Since I lost I hard drive I don't have as much, but he has triple the tracks that I do in his collection, easy. I'm going to rape his computer with my flashdrive the next time I'm over his place.
Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eve on June 13, 2011, 02:50:23 AM
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU SAY, THE BEATLES ARE GREAT. STILL!  Not a fan of McCartney on his own at all, though, which I've also heard from many Beatles fans. Interesting that DF is the opposite.
Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 13, 2011, 03:29:10 AM
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but if DF and I don't rip on each other at least one a day for something random, then something's wrong. Today, we ripped on each other's musical tastes.

Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on June 13, 2011, 07:54:56 AM
Quote from: Cainad on June 13, 2011, 12:06:36 AM
When in gobshitting splutterfuck did The Beatles become "hipsters", for fuck's sake?

In their time you couldn't GET more mainstream than the fucking Beatles.

They were into being mainstream before it became big and popular.
Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Chairman Risus on June 13, 2011, 10:18:08 AM
The Beatles sucked wet mops.
Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Fredfredly ⊂(◉‿◉)つ on June 13, 2011, 12:58:43 PM
I don't like the beatles because i don't like the beatles and i don't need a reason other than that.
Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on June 13, 2011, 01:15:27 PM
I like the Beatles, separately, except for McCartney because he's a gigantic ball of suck.  But together, their music doesn't do much for me, save for a tune here or there.

My wife, on the other hand, HUGE Beatles fan.  But I suppose this is where that "opposites attract" thing comes into play.  Cause she really isn't a big fan of my Scandinavian Folk Metal.  So I suppose it all evens out in the end. 
Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 13, 2011, 05:38:02 PM
DF: Back to work today, yay!

Me: Woot, look at yo' gimpy ass making t-shirts!

DF: Yes, but you know what?

Me: What?

DF: At least I have a job.

Me: :sadbanana:

DF: Yes, that's right. You may have one yesterday's battle of music, but today, I win the war of awesome!
Title: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on June 13, 2011, 05:48:33 PM
Quote from: Cain on June 13, 2011, 07:54:56 AM
Quote from: Cainad on June 13, 2011, 12:06:36 AM
When in gobshitting splutterfuck did The Beatles become "hipsters", for fuck's sake?

In their time you couldn't GET more mainstream than the fucking Beatles.

They were into being mainstream before it became big and popular.

Oh my god, you're right!! :lulz:

:mittens:

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 15, 2011, 02:19:37 PM
Mom: Happy Smack a Douchebag Day!

Me: I LIKE THIS DAY!

Mom: ME TOO! Your poor dad.

Me: Wait...today is Take No Shit Day, Smack a Douchebag Day is on Saturday.

Mom: Maybe it floats, like Easter, only it floats every couple of days, so douches get smacked on a regular basis.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on June 15, 2011, 02:25:02 PM
Quote from: Your Evil Stepmother on June 15, 2011, 02:19:37 PM
Mom: Happy Smack a Douchebag Day!

Me: I LIKE THIS DAY!

Mom: ME TOO! Your poor dad.

Me: Wait...today is Take No Shit Day, Smack a Douchebag Day is on Saturday.

Mom: Maybe it floats, like Easter, only it floats every couple of days, so douches get smacked on a regular basis.

Have I mentioned lately that I love your Mom?   :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 15, 2011, 02:44:15 PM
She's been extra snarky lately too because my dad is having is nomadic itch again and wants to move. He already found a job in Huntsville, and my mom is threatening all sorts of nasty divorce if he does it.

This is standard Suu Family Cold War procedure, but there's only so much I can take. The War of the Rhode Island Migration lasted about 6 months before she finally caved, the 2nd War of Florida Aggression wasn't AS bad, because by that time she was on lithium most of the time anyway (I was too young to remember the 1st War, but from what I understand it almost involved my dad going by himself and leaving my pregnant mom with 2 kids behind.) I think she's going to win this one, especially since they own the house this time and they don't want to deal with selling again.

He's already been offered his job back in Providence, as well, with a SUBSTANTIAL pay raise (like, 20k more than what he was making before), but he can't handle the winter with his leg. I'd love to have my parents back up north (as long as they stay in South County again) but if he can't function when the temp drops below 30 or shovel snow, as my brother wouldn't be with them this time, it's not a good move.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Fredfredly ⊂(◉‿◉)つ on June 22, 2011, 04:40:14 AM
Mourning_Star_: if I go owner op I want a Royal Blue Freightliner Cascadia
Mourning_Star_: and I am going to have a 7ft tall cock airbrushed on the side.
Mourning_Star_: veiny and throbbing
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 23, 2011, 07:25:03 PM
Sister: You should get a job at Victoria's Secret, like me.

Me: No. The idea of selling undies to the bitchy women of Providence does not thrill me.

Sister: No really, I like it. They take good care of their employees and the customers actually aren't as bad as you think.

Me: That's in Clearwater. Women in Providence are catty cunts, you know this.

Sister: YOU WILL JOIN US. OR DIE.

Me: I WILL NOT CONFORM TO YOUR CULT OF PANTIES!

Sister: I love panties...@_@
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eve on June 26, 2011, 01:27:56 AM
Coworker relaying her newfound favorite insult: "Since your personality is clearly your preferred method of birth control, you must save a lot on condoms."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on June 26, 2011, 11:30:39 PM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 27, 2011, 03:01:34 PM
Dartmouth Fett: Good morning! It's the last day of my youth! I need to do something stupid tonight!

Me: How about a teenager?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on June 27, 2011, 03:08:27 PM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on June 27, 2011, 03:01:34 PM
Dartmouth Fett: Good morning! It's the last day of my youth! I need to do something stupid tonight!

Me: How about a teenager?

:169:

:pwned:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 27, 2011, 03:40:54 PM
Seester: It's fucking cold in here. Why the HELL do they have to make doctor's offices so cold?!

Me: You better pray that your speculum is plastic, then.

Seester: OH MY GOD.


-Few minutes later-

Seester: I'm finally in the goddamn exam room. 2 hours later. Goddamnit.

Me: COLD SPECULUM!

Seester: DIE!!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on June 27, 2011, 04:04:29 PM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on June 27, 2011, 03:01:34 PM
Dartmouth Fett: Good morning! It's the last day of my youth! I need to do something stupid tonight!

Me: How about a teenager?
:spit:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 03:02:56 AM
*SUV full of Hispanics with 2 mattresses on top blow past playing bachata really loud.*

Suu: *starts busting a groove in the Viking Longcar* "That's harsh stuff. It's like...industrial bachata."

Richter: "Industrial bachata...it sounds like a Dirty Sanchez with rivets."

Luna: :spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 01, 2011, 03:24:57 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 01, 2011, 03:02:56 AM
*SUV full of Hispanics with 2 mattresses on top blow past playing bachata really loud.*

Suu: *starts busting a groove in the Viking Longcar* "That's harsh stuff. It's like...industrial bachata."

Richter: "Industrial bachata...it sounds like a Dirty Sanchez with rivets."

Luna: :spittake:

Suu jokes, but when Richter finds the diet coke that go sprayed on the back of Suu's seat, he's gonna come over and beat me to death.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 03:34:52 AM
Then we almost dropped it and he went on a tirade about lubricating the backseat of the car with Diet Coke and fast food wrappers. Then I said something about turning the car back around to Winnipeg, and you said I started it, you bitch. I'm telling mom!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on July 01, 2011, 03:39:33 AM
Oh GodDAMMIT.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 03:41:45 AM
Look, dude, the soda pop was hers, okay? I just stole a swig.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 01, 2011, 03:51:40 AM
Quote from: Richter on July 01, 2011, 03:39:33 AM
Oh GodDAMMIT.

If nobody hears from me tomorrow, Richter did it.  Or Suu did.  Maybe both.

(And she DID start it!  She DID!)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 03:55:24 AM
WTF.

YOU STABBED ME IN MY CANCER-TWAT!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 03:59:37 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 01, 2011, 03:55:24 AM
WTF.

YOU STABBED ME IN MY CANCER-TWAT!!

I choked on my water a little bit there.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:01:54 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 01, 2011, 03:55:24 AM
WTF.

YOU STABBED ME IN MY CANCER-TWAT!!

(Ah, fuck, Suu, THINK what these guys are gonna think was going on...)

I was tryin' to stab out the cancer...  Figured if I scared the shoggoth, it'd crap the cancer right out on the floor, and the guys could stab the fuck out of it.

(Truth:  I have a very low guard, and if I have to dip under blades to get the shot in... well...  Groin shots happen.  Was one of the guys last week, your turn this week.  Odds are one of these days even Ouzel's gonna get careless and get clipped in the cup.  Sad part is, I don't even TRY, they just happen...)

ETA:  SEE?  You almost killed Twid....
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 04:02:50 AM
That was so goddamn funny.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?! THERE'S CANCER IN THERE!!!!!!!!!!"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:05:59 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 01, 2011, 04:02:50 AM
That was so goddamn funny.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?! THERE'S CANCER IN THERE!!!!!!!!!!"

Hey, who you gonna trust in there with sharp implements?  Some guy in a white coat and rubber gloves, or your friends?

(Doesn't work at all, does it?)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 04:11:08 AM
Quote from: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:05:59 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 01, 2011, 04:02:50 AM
That was so goddamn funny.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?! THERE'S CANCER IN THERE!!!!!!!!!!"

Hey, who you gonna trust in there with sharp implements?  Some guy in a white coat and rubber gloves, or your friends?

(Doesn't work at all, does it?)

*crosses legs and whimpers*
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on July 01, 2011, 04:11:23 AM
Wait....


CARCINOMA?




BEAN CUP.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on July 01, 2011, 04:12:59 AM
Daughter in checkout line pointing to the stocky dark skinned dude in front of us: That guy looks like Fat Albert

:noob:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 04:17:34 AM
Archangel Gabriel: "Maximus is utilizing an orange for his cannabis needs."

Me: "Wait...what?"

*IMs Max*

"WTF are you doing with an orange?"

Max: "Smoking out of it."

Me: "How the fuck?"

Max: "Um, you showed me how to do this like, 10 years ago."

Me: "I...did?"

Max: "Cocaine, er, MDMA is a hell of a drug."

Me: "MY BRAIN HOLES."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:20:06 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on July 01, 2011, 04:12:59 AM
Daughter in checkout line pointing to the stocky dark skinned dude in front of us: That guy looks like Fat Albert

:noob:

Fuck. Theme-song is stuck in my head.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:24:57 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:20:06 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on July 01, 2011, 04:12:59 AM
Daughter in checkout line pointing to the stocky dark skinned dude in front of us: That guy looks like Fat Albert

:noob:

Fuck. Theme-song is stuck in my head.

Gotyerback, Twid.  Here, click this, quick!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARfLaNJcpsw
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 04:27:46 AM
HEY HEY HEY!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:45:25 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 01, 2011, 04:27:46 AM
HEY HEY HEY!
Na na na nanana nana!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:46:01 AM
Quote from: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:24:57 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:20:06 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on July 01, 2011, 04:12:59 AM
Daughter in checkout line pointing to the stocky dark skinned dude in front of us: That guy looks like Fat Albert

:noob:

Fuck. Theme-song is stuck in my head.

Gotyerback, Twid.  Here, click this, quick!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARfLaNJcpsw

Oh goddammit, lol
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:47:55 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:46:01 AM
Quote from: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:24:57 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:20:06 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on July 01, 2011, 04:12:59 AM
Daughter in checkout line pointing to the stocky dark skinned dude in front of us: That guy looks like Fat Albert

:noob:

Fuck. Theme-song is stuck in my head.

Gotyerback, Twid.  Here, click this, quick!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARfLaNJcpsw

Oh goddammit, lol

Fat Albert is no longer stuck in your head, I betcha.

:kiss:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:49:17 AM
Quote from: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:47:55 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:46:01 AM
Quote from: Luna on July 01, 2011, 04:24:57 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2011, 04:20:06 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on July 01, 2011, 04:12:59 AM
Daughter in checkout line pointing to the stocky dark skinned dude in front of us: That guy looks like Fat Albert

:noob:

Fuck. Theme-song is stuck in my head.

Gotyerback, Twid.  Here, click this, quick!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARfLaNJcpsw

Oh goddammit, lol

Fat Albert is no longer stuck in your head, I betcha.

:kiss:

This is a correct assessment.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 01, 2011, 08:34:29 AM
Quote from: Richter on July 01, 2011, 04:11:23 AM
Wait....


CARCINOMA?




BEAN CUP.

TED DANTSON??
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 01, 2011, 05:19:50 PM
Quote from: Jenkem and SPACE/TIME on July 01, 2011, 08:34:29 AM
Quote from: Richter on July 01, 2011, 04:11:23 AM
Wait....


CARCINOMA?




BEAN CUP.

TED DANTSON??

$2.00?!

NO!

$1.00?!

NO!!

$.75?!

NO!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 02, 2011, 01:12:16 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on June 15, 2010, 04:54:26 AM

I was. I WAS that girl. I was that crazy girl that guys talk about, the one that thinks she's in a relationship but in fact she's just being used as a toy and a free escort. I was the girl that let herself become obsessed over a guy that could, in the end, care very little. Fuck.


:kingmeh:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 02, 2011, 06:19:38 AM
It's my opinion that summer is a good time to learn things about oneself and then work on them, and work at working on them.  That's what I'm doing this summer.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 02, 2011, 03:14:34 PM
I think you're right, which is why I started writing that tale again. The season just seems very cleansing. There's more opportunities to get out of the house (well, in New England, anyway, probably not so much in Tucson) and work on projects rather than sit inside and stew at the shit outside.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 02, 2011, 04:38:21 PM

Quote from: LMNO on July 1, 2011

Just shut up and play the damn song!


This was addressed to his bassist and guitarist on stage.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 03, 2011, 09:43:59 PM
DF: Transformers!

Me: I heard it was Meh.

DF: Shut yo mouth!

Me: Just talkin' bout Shaft.

DF: Imax 3D!

Me: Why are you gloating?

DF: I'm just excited.

Me: Splendid.

DF: Have you seen Super 8 yet?

Me: Nope.

DF: You should, you'd really like it.

Me: After the paychecks come in I'll start playing movie catchup.

DF: Or you could flirt with a boy at the theatre and get in for free.

Me: Yeah no, they're all a bit young for me. ;) I just need a sugar daddy, you know, someone older and more mature to take care of me.

DF: ...

Me: Oh, I'm sorry, did I hit a nerve?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 04, 2011, 05:00:41 AM
My friend: "Installing the Sims 3 and its expansions. Tonight... I become a god."
His friend: "Don't fail like me and have a sim that was an astronaut and he died cause a satellite fell on him..."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 04, 2011, 05:02:08 AM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 04, 2011, 05:00:41 AM
My friend: "Installing the Sims 3 and its expansions. Tonight... I become a god."
His friend: "Don't fail like me and have a sim that was an astronaut and he died cause a satellite fell on him..."

TGG (my daughter) playing Sims.

Me:  "Why the hell do you play that when you have a real family?"

TGG:  "Because if I wall my real family up and leave them to die, I'll go to prison."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on July 04, 2011, 05:17:50 AM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 04, 2011, 09:10:54 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 04, 2011, 05:02:08 AM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 04, 2011, 05:00:41 AM
My friend: "Installing the Sims 3 and its expansions. Tonight... I become a god."
His friend: "Don't fail like me and have a sim that was an astronaut and he died cause a satellite fell on him..."

TGG (my daughter) playing Sims.

Me:  "Why the hell do you play that when you have a real family?"

TGG:  "Because if I wall my real family up and leave them to die, I'll go to prison."

OH WOW.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 04, 2011, 12:45:45 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 04, 2011, 05:02:08 AM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 04, 2011, 05:00:41 AM
My friend: "Installing the Sims 3 and its expansions. Tonight... I become a god."
His friend: "Don't fail like me and have a sim that was an astronaut and he died cause a satellite fell on him..."

TGG (my daughter) playing Sims.

Me:  "Why the hell do you play that when you have a real family?"

TGG:  "Because if I wall my real family up and leave them to die, I'll go to prison."

Was it wrong that I created a whole flock of kids and drowned them in the swimming pool just so I could build a haunted house?   :aww:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Sita on July 04, 2011, 01:04:30 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 04, 2011, 05:02:08 AM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 04, 2011, 05:00:41 AM
My friend: "Installing the Sims 3 and its expansions. Tonight... I become a god."
His friend: "Don't fail like me and have a sim that was an astronaut and he died cause a satellite fell on him..."

TGG (my daughter) playing Sims.

Me:  "Why the hell do you play that when you have a real family?"

TGG:  "Because if I wall my real family up and leave them to die, I'll go to prison."
This is 95% of my Sims play, I will admit.
There's just something about being able to drown, wall up, or set on fire a bunch of virtual people when you are having an I Hate People day.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 05, 2011, 02:50:43 PM
"The problem with quotes on the internet is that it is hard to verify their authenticity." -- Abraham Lincoln
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 06, 2011, 08:32:02 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 05, 2011, 02:50:43 PM
"The problem with quotes on the internet is that it is hard to verify their authenticity." -- Abraham Lincoln
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on July 06, 2011, 10:06:41 AM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 06, 2011, 08:32:02 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 05, 2011, 02:50:43 PM
"The problem with quotes on the internet is that it is hard to verify their authenticity." -- Abraham Lincoln
:lulz:

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 06, 2011, 02:15:56 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 02, 2011, 04:38:21 PM

Quote from: LMNO on July 1, 2011

Just shut up and play the damn song!


This was addressed to his bassist and guitarist on stage.

Apparently, sometimes we drink before going on stage.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 06, 2011, 06:29:53 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on July 06, 2011, 02:15:56 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 02, 2011, 04:38:21 PM

Quote from: LMNO on July 1, 2011

Just shut up and play the damn song!


This was addressed to his bassist and guitarist on stage.

Apparently, sometimes we drink before going on stage.

:cheers:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 06, 2011, 11:17:59 PM
Lil sis: Something about writing about "...the bad things about the Treaty of Verelly"
Step Dad: "You mean the Treaty of Versailles?"


:kingmeh: *Facepalm*

I know she phonetically attempted to say it, but still  :kingmeh:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 06, 2011, 11:20:09 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 06, 2011, 06:29:53 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on July 06, 2011, 02:15:56 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 02, 2011, 04:38:21 PM

Quote from: LMNO on July 1, 2011

Just shut up and play the damn song!


This was addressed to his bassist and guitarist on stage.

Apparently, sometimes we drink before going on stage.

:cheers:

"Sometimes"?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 07, 2011, 12:37:17 AM
Quote from: Luna on July 06, 2011, 11:20:09 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 06, 2011, 06:29:53 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD on July 06, 2011, 02:15:56 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 02, 2011, 04:38:21 PM

Quote from: LMNO on July 1, 2011

Just shut up and play the damn song!


This was addressed to his bassist and guitarist on stage.

Apparently, sometimes we drink before going on stage.

:cheers:

"Sometimes"?

You'd be surprised. We actually like playing the music as we wrote it, and that means twitch muscle coordination. It's just that when playing last, beer seems to enter our bloodstream without our noticing.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 07, 2011, 01:13:06 AM
This is true. Being a little drunk on stage isnt that fun. Going on last is also not fun since you have to choose whether to cut yourself off real early or risk not exactly being sober when youre playing.

Twid
likes to go on second or third.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Disco Pickle on July 07, 2011, 01:58:50 AM
‎"Tomorrow, Roger Clemens goes on trial for lying . . . to politicians. Which is like charging a woman for flashing her breasts at a stripper."
- Radley Balko, FB status update, 7/6/11

no idea who that guy is but someone cross posted it and I caught it and had a chuckle.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 07, 2011, 02:00:12 AM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on July 07, 2011, 02:29:19 AM
Quote from: Disco Pickle on July 07, 2011, 01:58:50 AM
‎"Tomorrow, Roger Clemens goes on trial for lying . . . to politicians. Which is like charging a woman for flashing her breasts at a stripper."
- Radley Balko, FB status update, 7/6/11

no idea who that guy is but someone cross posted it and I caught it and had a chuckle.
Baseball player. Lied about taking steroids. Shock and awe.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 07, 2011, 02:59:21 AM
Speaking on FB with a biology teacher friend of mine:

XXX XXXX: "But I don't even believe in Jebus, Rog!"

Hamish Howl:   "Now, see, that's downright un-American. When Jesus helped James Madison write the bill of rights, he didn't mean it to apply to Godless commies such as yourself. IT'S FREEDOM *OF* RELIGION, NOT FREEDOM *FROM* RELIGION!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go watch Michelle Bachmann's sparkly wit on Fox News, eat pork rinds, and die of congestive heart failure."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on July 07, 2011, 03:00:53 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 07, 2011, 02:59:21 AM
Speaking on FB with a biology teacher friend of mine:

XXX XXXX: "But I don't even believe in Jebus, Rog!"

Hamish Howl:   "Now, see, that's downright un-American. When Jesus helped James Madison write the bill of rights, he didn't mean it to apply to Godless commies such as yourself. IT'S FREEDOM *OF* RELIGION, NOT FREEDOM *FROM* RELIGION!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go watch Michelle Bachmann's sparkly wit on Fox News, eat pork rinds, and die of congestive heart failure."
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 07, 2011, 08:50:42 PM
"So creepy dads can lie in a suductive pose." lmao, from WTF blanket parody
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 08, 2011, 06:49:21 AM
*On the news, they were talking about the new obesity statistics and when they went to a commercial break, it's taco bell's XXL burrito and how other people from other countries note how big the burritos are.*

Me: "Maybe it's because of the giant burritos."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on July 08, 2011, 07:17:28 AM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 08, 2011, 06:49:21 AM
*On the news, they were talking about the new obesity statistics and when they went to a commercial break, it's taco bell's XXL burrito and how other people from other countries note how big the burritos are.*

Me: "Maybe it's because of the giant burritos."


:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 08, 2011, 08:37:22 AM
Me (I live in CA):  Tis late here, waiting to Skype with TJ.  (TJ is my boyfriend.)

JL (an old troll friend of mine, he lives in LA): Its 2:20 here though u_u so it's later. I'm in the future.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on July 08, 2011, 07:36:54 PM
"If you were to breed my dog, what other breed would you mate her with?"

"Ditto.  That way she's guaranteed to be the same breed, have the same talents, and keep her favorable I...why are you looking at me like that?"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 08, 2011, 10:11:26 PM
 
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on July 08, 2011, 07:36:54 PM
"If you were to breed my dog, what other breed would you mate her with?"

"Ditto.  That way she's guaranteed to be the same breed, have the same talents, and keep her favorable I...why are you looking at me like that?"

:lulz:
I <3 Pokemon
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 08, 2011, 10:42:12 PM
Two separate quotes from an old troll friend of mine:


JL: Apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when your mom asks "What happened? You look sad today".

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jl: Failed my Politics exam. The question was "Describe the role that India plays in the modern world".

Apparently "Tech Support" is not the correct answer.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Disco Pickle on July 08, 2011, 10:45:27 PM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 08, 2011, 10:42:12 PM
Two separate quotes from an old troll friend of mine:


JL: Apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when your mom asks "What happened? You look sad today".

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jl: Failed my Politics exam. The question was "Describe the role that India plays in the modern world".

Apparently "Tech Support" is not the correct answer.

:lulz:


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 10, 2011, 09:53:47 PM
More from my friend JL

"How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?
20,001. One to change it, and the other 20,000 to repeatedly chant "U.S.A.""


"Games dont make people violent, lag does"


"Why does princess Diana have no friend on Xbox Live?
Because she's always on the dashboard."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on July 10, 2011, 11:22:10 PM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 10, 2011, 09:53:47 PM
"Why does princess Diana have no friend on Xbox Live?
Because she's always on the dashboard."


Recently deceased man: "Mother Theresa devoted her entire life to serving others, why is Princess Diana's halo so much larger than hers?"

St. Peter: "That's not a halo, it's a steering wheel."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 10, 2011, 11:25:14 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on July 10, 2011, 11:22:10 PM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 10, 2011, 09:53:47 PM
"Why does princess Diana have no friend on Xbox Live?
Because she's always on the dashboard."


Recently deceased man: "Mother Theresa devoted her entire life to serving others, why is Princess Diana's halo so much larger than hers?"

St. Peter: "That's not a halo, it's a steering wheel."

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on July 10, 2011, 11:33:39 PM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on July 11, 2011, 03:44:26 AM
You are all terrible people.

Phox,
Used to think "Princess Died" was a strange nickname.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 11, 2011, 04:43:22 PM
JL does not take a break  :lulz:

"My wife has just been to the police about a man who has been following her.

I don't think she really understands the concept of Twitter."



" How many Africans does it take to change a light bulb?

6
One to screw it in, 5 to dance around for no fucking reason."



"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

12.
One to screw it in,
one to excoriate men for creating the need for illumination,
one to blame men for inventing such a faulty means of illumination,
one to suggest the whole "screwing" bit to be too "rape-like",
one to deconstruct the lightbulb itself as being phallic,
one to blame men for not changing the bulb,
one to blame men for trying to change the bulb instead of letting a woman do it,
one to blame men for creating a society that discourages women from changing light bulbs,
one to blame men for creating a society where women change too many light bulbs,
one to advocate that lightbulb changers should have wage parity with electricians,
one to alert the media that women are now "out-lightbulbing" men,
and one to just sit there taking pictures for her blog for photo-evidence that men are unnecessary."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Disco Pickle on July 11, 2011, 04:47:12 PM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 10, 2011, 11:25:14 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on July 10, 2011, 11:22:10 PM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 10, 2011, 09:53:47 PM
"Why does princess Diana have no friend on Xbox Live?
Because she's always on the dashboard."


Recently deceased man: "Mother Theresa devoted her entire life to serving others, why is Princess Diana's halo so much larger than hers?"

St. Peter: "That's not a halo, it's a steering wheel."

:lulz:

Princess Diana jokes, nice.

What would princess Diana be doing right now if she was alive?

Clawing at the roof of her coffin.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 11, 2011, 04:52:04 PM
Quote from: ShoeEars on July 08, 2011, 10:42:12 PM
Two separate quotes from an old troll friend of mine:


JL: Apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when your mom asks "What happened? You look sad today".

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jl: Failed my Politics exam. The question was "Describe the role that India plays in the modern world".

Apparently "Tech Support" is not the correct answer.

:lulz:

Equally, it should be noted Indian hegemony should not be supported on the basis that "at least the food will be better than Subway or MacDonalds".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on July 12, 2011, 04:46:11 AM
"Dispatch I'm en route to the possible B&E, I've got 404 Main St for a location.  Can you get on the line with the town and get any more information on the area?"

"Well, it's at 404 Main St, sir."

"Right, can you call them back and find out any land marks, or where it's near?"

"I imagine it's near 403 Main St and 405 Main St, sir."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on July 12, 2011, 07:55:34 AM
‎"He has insomnia, so he stays up all night bothering people on facebook to get into fights with them so hes not alone at night. "
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on July 12, 2011, 01:39:54 PM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on July 12, 2011, 04:46:11 AM
"Dispatch I'm en route to the possible B&E, I've got 404 Main St for a location.  Can you get on the line with the town and get any more information on the area?"

"Well, it's at 404 Main St, sir."

"Right, can you call them back and find out any land marks, or where it's near?"

"I imagine it's near 403 Main St and 405 Main St, sir."

But 404 is Not Found, 403 is Forbidden and 405 is Not Allowed!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 12, 2011, 01:49:32 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on July 12, 2011, 01:39:54 PM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on July 12, 2011, 04:46:11 AM
"Dispatch I'm en route to the possible B&E, I've got 404 Main St for a location.  Can you get on the line with the town and get any more information on the area?"

"Well, it's at 404 Main St, sir."

"Right, can you call them back and find out any land marks, or where it's near?"

"I imagine it's near 403 Main St and 405 Main St, sir."

But 404 is Not Found, 403 is Forbidden and 405 is Not Allowed!

:crankey:

....


:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on July 12, 2011, 02:04:20 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on July 12, 2011, 01:39:54 PM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on July 12, 2011, 04:46:11 AM
"Dispatch I'm en route to the possible B&E, I've got 404 Main St for a location.  Can you get on the line with the town and get any more information on the area?"

"Well, it's at 404 Main St, sir."

"Right, can you call them back and find out any land marks, or where it's near?"

"I imagine it's near 403 Main St and 405 Main St, sir."

But 404 is Not Found, 403 is Forbidden and 405 is Not Allowed!

:aaa:    :argh!:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 13, 2011, 03:08:19 AM
Me: I'm going blonde.

The Archangel Gabriel: ...I remember when you were blonde.

Me: This is going to be all over, though, not just the front.

Gabe: ...I'll be in my bunk.

Me:  :oops:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 13, 2011, 03:21:38 AM
"Holy technicolor Jesus, that's good."

...  Nah, some things are just better without context.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 13, 2011, 03:36:37 AM
(http://i1196.photobucket.com/albums/aa417/DoktorHowl/fb1.jpg)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 13, 2011, 03:40:24 AM
For the record, that's Vex, and he's kidding.   :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on July 13, 2011, 04:37:35 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 13, 2011, 03:40:24 AM
For the record, that's Vex, and he's kidding.   :lol:

:lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on July 19, 2011, 03:23:09 AM
My cousin lives in Bavaria, he failed to graduate from school due to apathy and incompetence. He's having a hard time finding work that isn't straight up manual labor, which he doesn't want to do. A true product of modern german parenting he's a selfish, spoiled little shit.

"I want to move to africa where there is no money or conflict. There, people are content with what they have. Here it's all about money and conflict and it's all just shit. I'm stressed have no more motivation"

:facepalm: :cramstipated: :walken: :tyra:



Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 19, 2011, 03:42:40 AM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2011, 03:23:09 AM
My cousin lives in Bavaria, he failed to graduate from school due to apathy and incompetence. He's having a hard time finding work that isn't straight up manual labor, which he doesn't want to do. A true product of modern german parenting he's a selfish, spoiled little shit.

"I want to move to africa where there is no money or conflict. There, people are content with what they have. Here it's all about money and conflict and it's all just shit. I'm stressed have no more motivation"

:facepalm: :cramstipated: :walken: :tyra:




:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:  Kids in Africa don't have it as bad as that guy!!


Also, I have one of my own for once.

So my math teacher has an accent (but is understable, thank god, I have such a hard time with listening through accents), and she either has a deep tan or is olive-skinned.  Consider the fact that she mentioned last week that she was from the country she was (no reveal just yet), the following was hilarious:

Student: You speak spanish, right?
Teacher: No, I don't speak spanish.
Student: Oh, you don't speak it, you just have the accent?
Teacher:  The accent is Greek.
Classroom: :lulz:

:169:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on July 19, 2011, 03:47:27 AM
Holy, fucking, shit. Really? :lulz:


Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2011, 03:23:09 AM
My cousin lives in Bavaria, he failed to graduate from school due to apathy and incompetence. He's having a hard time finding work that isn't straight up manual labor, which he doesn't want to do. A true product of modern german parenting he's a selfish, spoiled little shit.

"I want to move to africa where there is no money or conflict. There, people are content with what they have. Here it's all about money and conflict and it's all just shit. I'm stressed have no more motivation"

:facepalm: :cramstipated: :walken: :tyra:




Suggest a sight-seeing tour of Somalia.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 19, 2011, 03:50:12 AM
Quote from: Hover Cat on July 19, 2011, 03:47:27 AM
Holy, fucking, shit. Really? :lulz:

Yeah.  She even was talking about her being from Greece like, ten minutes before hand, too.  :lulz:

Quote
Suggest a sight-seeing tour of Somalia.

YES.  DO IT.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on July 19, 2011, 04:14:02 AM
Quote from: Hover Cat on July 19, 2011, 03:47:27 AM
Holy, fucking, shit. Really? :lulz:


Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2011, 03:23:09 AM
My cousin lives in Bavaria, he failed to graduate from school due to apathy and incompetence. He's having a hard time finding work that isn't straight up manual labor, which he doesn't want to do. A true product of modern german parenting he's a selfish, spoiled little shit.

"I want to move to africa where there is no money or conflict. There, people are content with what they have. Here it's all about money and conflict and it's all just shit. I'm stressed have no more motivation"

:facepalm: :cramstipated: :walken: :tyra:




Suggest a sight-seeing tour of Somalia.

His mom has a PhD and works for a pharmaceutical company and his dad is stay at home. HE HAS A CUSTOM BUILT BEDROOM IN A CUSTOM GREEN HOUSE THAT HAS AN AWARD BOLTED TO THE FRONT DOOR FOR SUPER HIPPIE GREENNESS NO SIR THERE NEVER WERE NAZIS HERE ONLY ECO FRIENDLY DICKFUCKS. HE'S NEVER HAD ONE HUNGRY DAY IN HIS LIFE. Not to mention he may or may not know Africa is a continent with varying economies throughout. I will ship him there in a fucking crate.

ETA: RAGE.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on July 19, 2011, 04:39:28 AM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2011, 04:14:02 AM
I will ship him there in a fucking crate.

This is the correct response.

If the crate is impractical, suggest he get mommy to pay for a vacation there, in order to scout out preferred places to live and possible employment. 

He might even come back.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 19, 2011, 04:47:32 AM
While I was heading up the stairs:

Mom: You know, there are plenty of razors up there.
Me: Hint hint, huh?
Mom: Hint hint.


:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 19, 2011, 04:56:25 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 19, 2011, 04:47:32 AM
While I was heading up the stairs:

Mom: You know, there are plenty of razors up there.
Me: Hint hint, huh?
Mom: Hint hint.


:lulz:

That reminds me of the winter when I decided to not shave my legs for 3 months.

Herbert got me a new razor, stuck it on the wall in the shower with a note that said, "Take the hint."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 19, 2011, 05:05:34 AM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on July 19, 2011, 04:56:25 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 19, 2011, 04:47:32 AM
While I was heading up the stairs:

Mom: You know, there are plenty of razors up there.
Me: Hint hint, huh?
Mom: Hint hint.


:lulz:

That reminds me of the winter when I decided to not shave my legs for 3 months.

Herbert got me a new razor, stuck it on the wall in the shower with a note that said, "Take the hint."

:lulz:

I've already told everyone, including her, that I'm going to continue to grow my goatee until my birthday (this has been going on since May).
I seriously can't wait for my birthday, as the mustache bit tends to interfere with normal eating.
Mom wanting me to shave it all off makes me want to keep at it. I guess I'll just never grow out of certain things.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on July 19, 2011, 08:57:15 AM
Are you just letting it grow all out, or also trimming it into shape? This is important!!



Also, there are enough places in Africa that aren't as bad as the rest, yet still uncomfortable enough that if the kid goes there for some sort of development project thing, he's got a good chance to learn a good dose of reality and return with a clue or two.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 19, 2011, 12:07:21 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on July 19, 2011, 08:57:15 AM
Are you just letting it grow all out, or also trimming it into shape? This is important!!



Also, there are enough places in Africa that aren't as bad as the rest, yet still uncomfortable enough that if the kid goes there for some sort of development project thing, he's got a good chance to learn a good dose of reality and return with a clue or two.

Trying to keep it shaped, but I've been negligent of that of late.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 19, 2011, 05:50:44 PM
QuoteThis 4 train ain't big enough for the two of us, you frontloaded sow. When the lady with the bag gets up, that seat is mine. I see her eyeing me up, thinking "how fast can he get around that pole?" Now, the real question she should be asking herself is 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, Heffer -- do ya?

My brother Max was having a bad day on the subway, I think.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 19, 2011, 11:45:49 PM
Spoken by someone who has never heard of PD and has never any proselytizing about Tucson, talking about job markets in class, emphasis mine:

Student:  If you have any technical skill at all, you'll end up in Tucson eventually.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 20, 2011, 02:11:50 AM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2011, 03:23:09 AM
My cousin lives in Bavaria, he failed to graduate from school due to apathy and incompetence. He's having a hard time finding work that isn't straight up manual labor, which he doesn't want to do. A true product of modern german parenting he's a selfish, spoiled little shit.

"I want to move to africa where there is no money or conflict. There, people are content with what they have. Here it's all about money and conflict and it's all just shit. I'm stressed have no more motivation"


Mail that kid a copy of Jason Stearn's Dancing in the Glory of Monsters.  He'll shit his pants.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 20, 2011, 02:13:53 AM
Quote from: Triple Zero on July 19, 2011, 08:57:15 AM
Are you just letting it grow all out, or also trimming it into shape? This is important!!



Also, there are enough places in Africa that aren't as bad as the rest, yet still uncomfortable enough that if the kid goes there for some sort of development project thing, he's got a good chance to learn a good dose of reality and return with a clue or two.

Fuck that.  Send him to work in the east Congo.  If he's lucky, the Rwandans will nail his ears to the inside of a crate and mail him back to Germany, once they get tired of his whining.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: PopeTom on July 20, 2011, 02:59:44 AM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2011, 03:23:09 AM
My cousin lives in Bavaria, he failed to graduate from school due to apathy and incompetence. He's having a hard time finding work that isn't straight up manual labor, which he doesn't want to do. A true product of modern german parenting he's a selfish, spoiled little shit.

"I want to move to africa where there is no money or conflict. There, people are content with what they have. Here it's all about money and conflict and it's all just shit. I'm stressed have no more motivation"

There's a reason humans left sub-Saharan Africa 1.8 million years ago!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on July 20, 2011, 03:03:21 PM
yeah wtf is that about anyway. First some of them were like "hey eh, we're gonna check out that continent place to the North over there, wanna come?" and others said "nah that's okay don't really feel like it, we'll just stay right here" and now they're all like WHAAA WE'RE SO HUNNNNGRYYYY
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 20, 2011, 06:04:12 PM
Quote from: Jenkem and SPACE/TIME on July 19, 2011, 11:45:49 PM
Spoken by someone who has never heard of PD and has never any proselytizing about Tucson, talking about job markets in class, emphasis mine:

Student:  If you have any technical skill at all, you'll end up in Tucson eventually.

:horrormirth:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 20, 2011, 06:04:41 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on July 20, 2011, 03:03:21 PM
yeah wtf is that about anyway. First some of them were like "hey eh, we're gonna check out that continent place to the North over there, wanna come?" and others said "nah that's okay don't really feel like it, we'll just stay right here" and now they're all like WHAAA WE'RE SO HUNNNNGRYYYY

:x :x :x
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on July 20, 2011, 09:50:15 PM
Question 1: Rupert, James, and Rebekah are all blind-folded and traveling in a car going at 70mph along a freeway. If the car has been doing this for the past five years, how much further will it go until one of them accepts any responsibility?


Question 2: Rebekah needs to make a phone call. What should she do?
(A) Pull over to a safe location and make the call there
(B) Dial one-handed, pressing random keys
(C) Hire a private investigator to make the call for her



(tip of the hat to Froggypance)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 23, 2011, 12:01:01 AM
"Did you give any of them a chemical sanchez?"

Dok, asking a question of one of the refinery guys down here who used to be a mortician.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 23, 2011, 12:13:52 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 26, 2011, 04:02:10 AM
From Capitol Grilling (the best cesspool of politics on the interbutts):

Quote from: Gore1FL
Quote from: Zulif BystanderSoylent Green is people?

Perhaps, but the Teriyaki flavored variety is to die for.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 26, 2011, 04:11:04 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 26, 2011, 08:29:41 PM
"I think of the postmodern attitude as that of a man who loves a very cultivated woman and knows he cannot say to her, "I love you madly," because he knows that she knows (and that she knows that he knows) that these words have already been written by Barbara Cartland. Still, there is a solution. He can say, "As Barbara Cartland would put it, I love you madly." - Umberto Eco
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on July 26, 2011, 08:34:16 PM
As a former reader (albeit a 15 year old one) of Barbara Cartland, I have to say:  :lulz:

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 27, 2011, 01:04:04 PM
Dad: Your mom's computer got a nasty virus from Facebook because she plays all those damn games, you know.

Me: Well yeah, that's why I make sure I run a secure connection and DON'T play those games.

Dad: Someone hacked into her account, changed it all to Spanish, and then from there, was able to get into Alan's account and take $200 from his Paypal.

Me: Wow, so my mom's ass did in fact get haxxored last night.

Dad: ???

Me: Internets. I come from them.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on July 27, 2011, 03:57:54 PM
Dr. Mr. Jenne:  Vun, Two, Tree, Foh *counting oranges at the dinner table from the fruit tray in front of him*  I'm practicing my Norwegian accent.  Because you  know we're all going to invade Norway.

*Son #1 looks up*

Dr. Mr. Jenne: Alex, my son, you can be the head of the Muslim Invasion of Norway.

Son #1: *raised eyebrow*

Jenne: :spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 27, 2011, 04:07:18 PM
:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on July 27, 2011, 04:11:29 PM
Yeah, he surprised me with that one.  Because at first I thought he was talking about the US.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 27, 2011, 08:40:21 PM
That's awesome.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Payne on July 28, 2011, 06:25:52 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 29, 2011, 07:07:07 PM
Byron: Kill some people for me!

Me: when I do it, I will yell, "ASS TO MOUTH JEWISH IN MY PANTS"

Byron: OH MY GOD YES.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on July 31, 2011, 10:57:17 PM
 :lulz: Do it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on August 03, 2011, 09:17:18 PM
From our buddy Wes Unruh ---------------

Nostradamus predicts facebook: http://www.sloppyunruh.com/alembic/notes/weird/synchronicity/strange-world/week-in-review/nostradamus-predicted-the-rise-of-facebook/

(http://www.sloppyunruh.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/Nostradamus-246x300.jpg)

QuoteFor each soul their own place forever
Faces will be the book of now
The weak rejoice as demons feed
Henceforth, he will leave his Mark
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on August 03, 2011, 09:21:42 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on August 03, 2011, 09:17:18 PM
From our buddy Wes Unruh ---------------

Nostradamus predicts facebook: http://www.sloppyunruh.com/alembic/notes/weird/synchronicity/strange-world/week-in-review/nostradamus-predicted-the-rise-of-facebook/

(http://www.sloppyunruh.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/Nostradamus-246x300.jpg)

QuoteFor each soul their own place forever
Faces will be the book of now
The weak rejoice as demons feed
Henceforth, he will leave his Mark

Roger and Three Other Damned Souls like this.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 03, 2011, 11:42:30 PM
The first two lines are obvious, but the second two need a little more explanation.

I believe the "demons" spoken of are, in fact, marketing and sales types, who, of course, use Facebook to gather valuable data about consumer habits. 

And Mark clearly refers to Zuckerberg's first name.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 04, 2011, 02:57:41 PM
Or, the "demons" line could refer to Farmville.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on August 04, 2011, 03:45:25 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 04, 2011, 02:57:41 PM
Or, the "demons" line could refer to Farmville.

Zygna is one of the worst.......
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on August 05, 2011, 03:25:56 AM
For posterity!
Wyldkat sez:
QuoteI know exactly what passive aggressiveness is.  I live with someone who can be very passive aggressive.  I do have some tendencies, but for the most part I catch them and I recognize them because of living with that person.  What you people are calling passive aggressive are for the most part misunderstandings (intentional or not, whichever it is) of what I'm saying.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on August 05, 2011, 03:28:00 AM
:lulz: She's such an idiot.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 05, 2011, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: Alty on August 05, 2011, 03:25:56 AM
For posterity!
Wyldkat sez:
QuoteI know exactly what passive aggressiveness is.  I live with someone who can be very passive aggressive.  I do have some tendencies, but for the most part I catch them and I recognize them because of living with that person.  What you people are calling passive aggressive are for the most part misunderstandings (intentional or not, whichever it is) of what I'm saying.



That was SO CLASSIC! :lulz: Meta passive-aggression.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on August 05, 2011, 06:26:25 AM
The worst, or best, part was...that's EXACTLY what I was going for in my rant. I could not have spoon-fed it to her any more than I did. And she just regurgitated it right back out.

You can't write that kind of shit. I, for one, will miss it. Kind of.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 05, 2011, 07:04:10 AM
Quote from: Alty on August 05, 2011, 06:26:25 AM
The worst, or best, part was...that's EXACTLY what I was going for in my rant. I could not have spoon-fed it to her any more than I did. And she just regurgitated it right back out.

You can't write that kind of shit. I, for one, will miss it. Kind of.

You can ALWAYS go back and poke at the funny!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on August 05, 2011, 07:55:44 AM
What's up with this? It doesn't look like an old site, but she says here she has no kids hxxp://rampant-griffon.net/paganplace/ (Click on "Pagan Family" on the sidebar) but at the forum she has two kids "with issues".

Even if they're her husband's kids, why would she claim them at one place and not claim them on another, RELATED site?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 05, 2011, 07:57:50 AM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on August 05, 2011, 07:55:44 AM
What's up with this? It doesn't look like an old site, but she says here she has no kids hxxp://rampant-griffon.net/paganplace/ (Click on "Pagan Family" on the sidebar) but at the forum she has two kids "with issues".

Even if they're her husband's kids, why would she claim them at one place and not claim them on another, RELATED site?

Uh oh, WK has some 'SPLAINING TO DO!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on August 05, 2011, 08:04:44 AM
Wait. Nobody, no rational perso-then again no.

Did she create a whole potty training thread for special needs children that don't exist?
If I were to give her the benefit of the doubt, which I do not, I would say that maybe she hasn't updated her site.

But I don't think that's it at ALL.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on August 05, 2011, 08:12:38 AM
Social issue, won't make it through the night camping, going to cub scout camp.

Huh.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on August 05, 2011, 08:18:01 AM
Went and talked to the school district, working with an advocacy group, yadda yadda.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on August 08, 2011, 08:21:41 PM
Cram   Cainad gave me like 12 pairs of diabetic socks as a Moosemas present in December.
Cram   I put on one pair, and within 24 hours three things had happened:
Cram   My childhood cat died, my grandfather died, and my girlfriend dumped me.
vexati0n   well, cats die, grandfathers die, and you're an asshole.
vexati0n   i don't see how diabetus has anything to do with this.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on August 08, 2011, 09:00:09 PM
Oh Cram...is all that true?  :(  Not the socks, the grandfather and cat?  If so, so sorry, man.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on August 08, 2011, 09:20:34 PM
oh that was back in December. thanks though!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on August 08, 2011, 09:27:45 PM
Are the robots hand picked by somebody or random? Cram's has a stache, mine has a little pinhead topknot...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on August 08, 2011, 09:58:18 PM
see the "did you turn everyone into a robot" thread in Apple Tlk.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on August 09, 2011, 02:35:35 AM
I shouldn't be surprised I'm related to this person. :kingmeh:

(http://img812.imageshack.us/img812/1789/unledpbj.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Stelpa on August 09, 2011, 03:40:26 AM
Quote from: COL Coyote on August 09, 2011, 02:35:35 AM
I shouldn't be surprised I'm related to this person. :kingmeh:

(http://img812.imageshack.us/img812/1789/unledpbj.png)

They're takin' our jerbs!
    \ \ \ \
  :angrymob:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on August 09, 2011, 03:43:19 AM
Who are we to get in the way of that person's dreams?  I fully support their move to North Korea, paradise.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 09, 2011, 01:40:45 PM
I for one also believe the USA should emulate those massive economic and political success stories, North Korea and Afghanistan.  If its good enough for them, it's good enough for the USA. 
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on August 09, 2011, 03:35:00 PM
My aunt took that down. :lulz:


(http://img847.imageshack.us/img847/5250/unled2gh.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 09, 2011, 03:50:22 PM
Yeah, Japan is well noted for executing Christians.  Don't you know anything Coyote?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 09, 2011, 03:53:15 PM
Do we even need to point out that "under God" has only been there since 1954?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on August 09, 2011, 03:59:44 PM
Even better is my religion is listed as Discordianism. "You don't worship Eris? GTFO OF MURKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on August 09, 2011, 06:09:24 PM
On a tea party website:

Me:  Why all the long faces?   :lulz:

Them:  You have been banned from this forum.  Date the ban will be lifted:  Never.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 09, 2011, 06:32:01 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on August 09, 2011, 06:09:24 PM
On a tea party website:

Me:  Why all the long faces?   :lulz:

Them:  You have been banned from this forum.  Date the ban will be lifted:  Never.

HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on August 09, 2011, 08:35:52 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on August 08, 2011, 08:21:41 PM
Cram   Cainad gave me like 12 pairs of diabetic socks as a Moosemas present in December.
Cram   I put on one pair, and within 24 hours three things had happened:
Cram   My childhood cat died, my grandfather died, and my girlfriend dumped me.
vexati0n   well, cats die, grandfathers die, and you're an asshole.
vexati0n   i don't see how diabetus has anything to do with this.

Oh god. This never ceases to be very :horrormirth: for me.

My bad, dude. My bad.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 11, 2011, 05:54:34 PM
Tiki: It only makes sense if they were from that isolated tribe that's had hardly any contact with other people

Zman: yep
you mean kentucky?

Tiki: Yes, that's the one
I couldn't remember the name
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on August 12, 2011, 01:28:02 AM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Disco Pickle on August 13, 2011, 10:54:37 PM
PickleGF: I haven't found enough teaching work this summer and will probably have to ask dad for help covering a few bills before August.

Pickle: Well, you could always sell your ass on the street.  I could be your pimp.  I don't have the pimp slap down yet but I could practice.  Have you ever sucked dick for money before?

PickleGF: No, but I should start charging YOU.  They don't call it a blow JOB for nothing.  That shit's WORK.  I should be compensated.

Pickle:   :spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on August 14, 2011, 07:20:06 AM
Guy running the boffer tournament at the renfaire: Hey Killty McTophat

Me:what?

Guy: want to sword fight? it's only a dollar.

Me: negative

Guy: come on you get to beat your loved ones.

Me already knowing where he going with this: I already can

Guy: in public

Me: I already can

Guy: with swords

Me: yup, already do that

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 14, 2011, 07:28:51 AM
You know, it just occured to me, in relation to your quote from the top of the page, Coyote...what kind of fucking retard tries to sneak into North Korea?  Where the hell are they fleeing from that is so bad that North Korea seems like a good place to go?  And why the hell haven't we toppled their government, instead of fart-arsing around in Libya?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on August 14, 2011, 07:32:09 AM
Quote from: Cain on August 14, 2011, 07:28:51 AM
You know, it just occured to me, in relation to your quote from the top of the page, Coyote...what kind of fucking retard tries to sneak into North Korea?  Where the hell are they fleeing from that is so bad that North Korea seems like a good place to go?  And why the hell haven't we toppled their government, instead of fart-arsing around in Libya?

Oh shit. I didn't even think about it that way. Thanks Cain. I don't think this aunt of mine is terribly smart anymore, or is at least one of those "the gummermint knows EVERYTHING" people. She thought I had the inside scoop on the Ft Hood shooting, when I was sitting in her living room the day it happened.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 14, 2011, 07:34:08 AM
Quote from: COL Coyote on August 14, 2011, 07:32:09 AM
Quote from: Cain on August 14, 2011, 07:28:51 AM
You know, it just occured to me, in relation to your quote from the top of the page, Coyote...what kind of fucking retard tries to sneak into North Korea?  Where the hell are they fleeing from that is so bad that North Korea seems like a good place to go?  And why the hell haven't we toppled their government, instead of fart-arsing around in Libya?

Oh shit. I didn't even think about it that way. Thanks Cain. I don't think this aunt of mine is terribly smart anymore, or is at least one of those "the gummermint knows EVERYTHING" people. She thought I had the inside scoop on the Ft Hood shooting, when I was sitting in her living room the day it happened.

You mean the Army didn't beam the relevant information directly into your head?

Seriously though, if you hadn't even been stationed at Fort Hood, that's pretty funny, in a sad kinda way.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on August 14, 2011, 07:38:36 AM
Quote from: Cain on August 14, 2011, 07:34:08 AM
Quote from: COL Coyote on August 14, 2011, 07:32:09 AM
Quote from: Cain on August 14, 2011, 07:28:51 AM
You know, it just occured to me, in relation to your quote from the top of the page, Coyote...what kind of fucking retard tries to sneak into North Korea?  Where the hell are they fleeing from that is so bad that North Korea seems like a good place to go?  And why the hell haven't we toppled their government, instead of fart-arsing around in Libya?

Oh shit. I didn't even think about it that way. Thanks Cain. I don't think this aunt of mine is terribly smart anymore, or is at least one of those "the gummermint knows EVERYTHING" people. She thought I had the inside scoop on the Ft Hood shooting, when I was sitting in her living room the day it happened.

You mean the Army didn't beam the relevant information directly into your head?

Seriously though, if you hadn't even been stationed at Fort Hood, that's pretty funny, in a sad kinda way.

It is extremely sad. I think she doesn't believe me when I tell her I am a simple supply clerk.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 14, 2011, 07:40:38 AM
That's what they all say.  That or a chef (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Under_Siege).
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 16, 2011, 01:06:13 AM
"If Hitler had bitch-tits and PMS, he would have won the war. Just saying."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on August 16, 2011, 03:58:09 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 16, 2011, 01:06:13 AM
"If Hitler had bitch-tits and PMS, he would have won the war. Just saying."

HAHAHA! :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on August 18, 2011, 11:01:32 PM
Dartmouth Fett: Hey, I have a question for you.

Me: This better be about the wedding.

DF: No, It's about New York Comic Con. Where are you staying?

Me: If I go, probably with my brother Max, because I'm broke this year.

DF: Oh, how far is that from the event?

Me: He lives in Lower Manhattan by Battery Park. It's a solid half hour by train to Penn Station and then a 10 minute walk.

DF: Eew, I'll look somewhere else then.

Me: Wait...you ASSUMED you'd be staying with me?

DF: Why? Does you're new boyfriend not want me there?

Me: It's not his say, it's mine.

DF: I don't believe you're seeing anyone anyway. It's not on Facebook yet.

Me: Not on Facebook? Who gives a fuck. You've obviously seen the pics of us by now.

DF: I don't really look at your pics unless I'm tagged in them. Besides, what I mean is that it's not your relationship status. You're still married to that chick.

Me: DON'T KNOCK MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE LIKE THAT!

DF: ??

Me: YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND OUR LOVE! OUR DEEP UNABIDING LOVE BROUGHT ON BY OUR COMMUNAL HATRED OF EGOTISTICAL FREELOADING DOUCHEBAGS.

DF: I suppose I shouldn't ask you about a press pass for NYCC, huh?

Me: Do you really want to fucking die next Saturday?!

DF: I'm sorry. I'm a douchebag, I know...

Me: Find a fucking room with your girlfriend and have her get you a fucking press pass. The next time you IM me it better be wedding related. That is all.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on August 18, 2011, 11:07:00 PM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on August 18, 2011, 11:01:32 PM
Dartmouth Fett: Hey, I have a question for you.

Me: This better be about the wedding.

DF: No, It's about New York Comic Con. Where are you staying?

Me: If I go, probably with my brother Max, because I'm broke this year.

DF: Oh, how far is that from the event?

Me: He lives in Lower Manhattan by Battery Park. It's a solid half hour by train to Penn Station and then a 10 minute walk.

DF: Eew, I'll look somewhere else then.

Me: Wait...you ASSUMED you'd be staying with me?

DF: Why? Does you're new boyfriend not want me there?

Me: It's not his say, it's mine.

DF: I don't believe you're seeing anyone anyway. It's not on Facebook yet.

Me: Not on Facebook? Who gives a fuck. You've obviously seen the pics of us by now.

DF: I don't really look at your pics unless I'm tagged in them. Besides, what I mean is that it's not your relationship status. You're still married to that chick.

Me: DON'T KNOCK MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE LIKE THAT!

DF: ??

Me: YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND OUR LOVE! OUR DEEP UNABIDING LOVE BROUGHT ON BY OUR COMMUNAL HATRED OF EGOTISTICAL FREELOADING DOUCHEBAGS.

DF: I suppose I shouldn't ask you about a press pass for NYCC, huh?

Me: Do you really want to fucking die next Saturday?!

DF: I'm sorry. I'm a douchebag, I know...

Me: Find a fucking room with your girlfriend and have her get you a fucking press pass. The next time you IM me it better be wedding related. That is all.

Want me to tag his ass in the woad-smearing pic?   :evil:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on August 18, 2011, 11:16:00 PM
What? of Oarstroker kissing me? Nah. I don't care.

While we were at war, DF had the audacity to ask me if I was still going to make his costumes for him for the convention in November and if I was going to be his partner for the bar costumes we were planning. He offered me money for one, which I may accept and gouge the shit out of him (he may be a douche but his money is still green). But the bar costumes are out. I suggested that he take his girl, then I remembered she can't legally sit on a barstool in the state of MA anyway and reminded him of it.

Oarstroker is going to come to that con with me. Maybe Thorfinnr too. That could be fun.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 19, 2011, 05:15:53 PM
Quote from: Her Royal Suuness on August 18, 2011, 11:01:32 PM

Me: YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND OUR LOVE! OUR DEEP UNABIDING LOVE BROUGHT ON BY OUR COMMUNAL HATRED OF EGOTISTICAL FREELOADING DOUCHEBAGS.


:lulz:

BTW, when you reach the point where you want to divorce me so you can socially recognize a boyfriend, it won't hurt my feelings.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on August 19, 2011, 06:02:06 PM
Oh I know, but it's more fun this way. I don't think he (Oarstroker) wants to Facebook anything yet anyway being that he's dealing with a vengeful and terrible Brazilian bitch goddess of an ex.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on August 20, 2011, 03:38:48 PM
"This krokodil stuff is awful.  Why can't people just do peyote or something?"

"Uh, because cacti aren't exactly abundant in fucking Russia!?"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on August 23, 2011, 07:59:14 PM
Sometimes, I rather feel like one of the most interesting things about me is whom I'm married to, not who I am...but that's me being lame.  Anyway, this is a conversation just emailed to me from my husband--he's on this local PBS panel and this is what he had to say recently (changed PI and name info to protect the not-so-innocent):

From: SOME CHICK <SOME CHICK@kpbs.org>
Date: August 23, 2011 10:25:49 AM PDT
To: Dr. Mr. Jenne
Subject: Re: viewer comments:  relations between muslims and non-muslims


Hello Dr. Mr. Jenne,
Thanks for watching the show and for your thoughtful comments.
Can I use a portion of them on our show this week - and can I use your name
and location (Where We Live in SD)?
Best,
SOME CHICK

On 8/21/11 12:19 PM, "Dr. Mr. Jenne" <dr.mr.jenne@gmail.com> wrote:


For us Muslim Americans, relations with other Americans is two-pronged.  On

the personal level, we feel very much welcomed into society.  Muslims work,

shop and send our kids to school along with everyone else and find it easy to

climb the economic ladder in America by learning well and working hard.

Non-Muslim Americans  are not just kind and respectful, they readily accept

Muslims into their social and professional circles.  This acceptance has

helped Muslim immigrants integrate into American society much better than in

European countries where bigotry and discrimination has alienated immigrant

communities, including Muslims.



At the political level, however, there is a dark undercurrent of villainizing

Muslims for short-term advantage.  Last year's efforts by Fox News, radio talk

shows and politicians like former Speaker Newt Gringrich to portray the

building of a mosque in New York as a victory for terrorists and the

opposition to the building of a mosque in Temecula made Muslims feel

stereotyped and hated.  Luckily these political antics have been short-lived

because they go against the character of america as an accepting and inclusive

society.



On the whole, I believe Muslim American love their country because it judges

them for what they contribute to society rather than who they are.  Muslims

feel optimistic about the future of America and their place in it.



Dr. Mr. Jenne, MD

Pediatrician

Where We Live in SD


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 24, 2011, 05:59:22 PM
I was all "South Dakota? I thought they lived somewhere in Cali... ohhhhhh."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on August 31, 2011, 03:22:24 AM
My friend Chris on Facebook:
QuoteI just watched Sean Hannity interview Dick Cheney. The adulation was nauseating. I kept waiting for Sean to say, "Look, Dick....I just want to lick your balls...teabag me now."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on August 31, 2011, 02:41:03 PM
Quote from: KLATTU at capitol grilling
It's the liberal way.

Whenever I point out aberrant behavior by black people( i.e., they don't tip, they speak ebonics,the 69% illegitimacy rate, the massively disproportionate incidence of crime) they IMMEDIATELY pull out the race card.

:lulz:

You can't improve on perfection, folks.  Even perfect failure.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 31, 2011, 02:50:40 PM
That's...  I don't even...


:cramstipated:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on August 31, 2011, 02:55:05 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 31, 2011, 02:50:40 PM
That's...  I don't even...


:cramstipated:

Gee, Dok, why do you hate people so much?   :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on August 31, 2011, 03:50:16 PM
Quote from: Jenne on August 23, 2011, 07:59:14 PM

At the political level, however, there is a dark undercurrent of villainizing

Muslims for short-term advantage.  Last year's efforts by Fox News, radio talk

shows and politicians like former Speaker Newt Gringrich to portray the

building of a mosque in New York as a victory for terrorists and the

opposition to the building of a mosque in Temecula made Muslims feel

stereotyped and hated.  Luckily these political antics have been short-lived

because they go against the character of america as an accepting and inclusive

society.



On the whole, I believe Muslim American love their country because it judges

them for what they contribute to society rather than who they are.  Muslims

feel optimistic about the future of America and their place in it.



Dr. Mr. Jenne, MD


This was read on-air by the local PBS station last weekend, btw.  We recorded it and watched it.  Very cool.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on August 31, 2011, 03:52:19 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on August 31, 2011, 02:41:03 PM
Quote from: KLATTU at capitol grilling
It's the liberal way.

Whenever I point out aberrant behavior by black people( i.e., they don't tip, they speak ebonics,the 69% illegitimacy rate, the massively disproportionate incidence of crime) they IMMEDIATELY pull out the race card.

:lulz:

You can't improve on perfection, folks.  Even perfect failure.

:lulz:

Wow.  This guy obviously has his head up so far up his ass, he thinks the sky naturally always smells like shit.

And people who are lost to all logic like that can't be argued into being shown the error of their ways, either.  You have to drive it home to them by having THEM be in that "race card" seat themselves.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on August 31, 2011, 05:57:33 PM
Boss: Hey Suu, I think our accountant is dead.

Me: Um...why?

Boss: He never called us back.

Me: Dude, he ALWAYS calls back, usually in minutes.

Boss: I KNOW, that's why I think he's dead. I know you called him last week, and I know I left at least 4 messages myself, even on his home phone.

Me: Good lord. Do you want me to look up the obits?

Boss: That may not be a bad idea.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on August 31, 2011, 06:49:53 PM
HC Dad: The POW camps the North ran were worse than concentration camps during the Holocaust.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 31, 2011, 06:51:58 PM
Does he mean concentration camps, or death camps?  Because the two are quite different, and the former only played a very minor part in the Holocaust.  I'm assuming he means the latter, and so is functionally retarded.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on August 31, 2011, 06:52:36 PM
Quote from: Hover Cat on August 31, 2011, 06:49:53 PM
HC Dad: The POW camps the North ran were worse than concentration camps during the Holocaust.

Has he been into the paint chips again?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on August 31, 2011, 07:11:04 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 31, 2011, 06:51:58 PM
Does he mean concentration camps, or death camps?  Because the two are quite different, and the former only played a very minor part in the Holocaust.  I'm assuming he means the latter, and so is functionally retarded.
Pretty sure, based on the rest of the conversation, that he meant death camps.

Quote from: Doktor Howl on August 31, 2011, 06:52:36 PM
Quote from: Hover Cat on August 31, 2011, 06:49:53 PM
HC Dad: The POW camps the North ran were worse than concentration camps during the Holocaust.

Has he been into the paint chips again?
Possibly. This is my biological father, who doesn't (supposedly) live instate, so I can't tell you for certain.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 02, 2011, 06:45:53 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on August 31, 2011, 02:41:03 PM
Quote from: KLATTU at capitol grilling
It's the liberal way.

Whenever I point out aberrant behavior by black people( i.e., they don't tip, they speak ebonics,the 69% illegitimacy rate, the massively disproportionate incidence of crime) they IMMEDIATELY pull out the race card.

:lulz:

You can't improve on perfection, folks.  Even perfect failure.

:lulz:

This ties into why Oregon has become such a hippie Utopia. We still have a massive White Guilt factor for making it illegal to BE BLACK IN OREGON until the exclusion law was repealed in 1926. This did not prevent townships from passing their own exclusion laws, including the Lake Oswego "No Blacks after 8pm" law, and of course the famous (unofficial) bank practice of Redlining in Portland, which persisted into the 1990's and is becoming less easily searchable these days due to what appears to be a deliberate attempt at (ahem) whitewashing by the City of Portland in naming one of its light-rail lines "The Red Line".

It may be interesting to note that Oregon did not vote to pass the 15th Amendment until 1959.

As a consequence, Oregon has been historically majority white since American settlements overbred the native sector, and had massive White Power/Neonazi movements until they were forcibly overthrown and mostly-evicted in the 1980's, but also, perhaps fortunately for us, has a high proportion of white people who are keenly aware of the oppressive racism and injustice of the recent past, and are highly flexible with non-white residents as a result, so Northwestern Oregon is a surprisingly friendly place to exist as a brown person.

This is pretty interesting: http://www.ccrh.org/center/posters/nepassage/history.htm

There used to be a lot more such articles available, but they seem to be gradually sinking. This irritates me on about the same level as the common hipster complaint,m "Portland is so white".

Perhaps needless to say, I was born and currently live in the historic, mostly-forgotten, redline district.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on September 02, 2011, 02:18:48 PM
Here's a battered White guy whining about how Portland's history of racism is making it too hard for him to be properly racist today:

http://oregonmag.com/OregonRacismTrib.htm
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on September 02, 2011, 05:06:08 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 02, 2011, 02:18:48 PM
Here's a battered White guy whining about how Portland's history of racism is making it too hard for him to be properly racist today:

http://oregonmag.com/OregonRacismTrib.htm

I can't even make it through that, it's just so :vom: 
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on September 02, 2011, 10:25:57 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 02, 2011, 02:18:48 PM
Here's a battered White guy whining about how Portland's history of racism is making it too hard for him to be properly racist today:

http://oregonmag.com/OregonRacismTrib.htm

QuoteJoe Uris, a flaming liberal academic, would instantly condemn someone who said, "Blacks are all ..." something or other.  He would call it stereotyping -- racist rhetoric.

Um...  Well...  YES, moron...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 02, 2011, 11:27:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 02, 2011, 02:18:48 PM
Here's a battered White guy whining about how Portland's history of racism is making it too hard for him to be properly racist today:

http://oregonmag.com/OregonRacismTrib.htm

Wow, that was impossible to read. from strawmen to red herrings to irrelevant comparisons, it was a huge load of WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR POINT?

Also, does he not remember the 80's here? The epidemic of violence was exactly that... there were race-related beatings EVERY NIGHT. Packs of skinheads were literally roaming the streets looking for black kids to beat up, and then packs of punks started roaming the streets looking for skinheads to beat up. Downtown after dark was retardedly unsafe for almost everyone.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Sister_Gothique on September 03, 2011, 07:21:36 AM
SG: I wasn't cheering on your potential demise...I was cheering on your potential rape.
James: See...This is why I can't take you anywhere.

James: Momma's favorite color means "Stop what you're doing!".
(Sarah didn't find that nearly as amusing as I did)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 03, 2011, 07:25:46 AM
Girl walking past my house:

"I JUST NEED TO ADD SOME WATER TO MY POWDERED MEAT"

:?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 07, 2011, 08:51:32 PM
Oarstroker: I am very sad. :(

Me: Awww, why?

Oarstroker: Because.

Me: Because why? Because you beat Space Marine in 6 hours?

Oarstroker: No.

Me: Because I'm not there?

Oarstroker: Well, kinda. I'm more sad that there's only one bowl left of your baked ziti.  :cry:

Me:  :|


Men.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on September 08, 2011, 12:20:30 AM
Today my math teacher said: ‎"I was about to drink my microphone... That would have been funny."





This was last night: *Secret Agent GARBO was listening to some weird ass music*

Me: "That is so screamo."

Secret Agent GARBO: "No, it is death country metal."

Me: "What??"

Secret Agent GARBO: "BIG DUMB FACE"

Me: o.o
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on September 08, 2011, 12:32:43 AM
Quote from: ShoeEars on September 08, 2011, 12:20:30 AM
Today my math teacher said: ‎"I was about to drink my microphone... That would have been funny."





This was last night: *Secret Agent GARBO was listening to some weird ass music*

Me: "That is so screamo."

Secret Agent GARBO: "No, it is death country metal."

Me: "What??"

Secret Agent GARBO: "BIG DUMB FACE"

Me: o.o


Wat.


HOVERCAT! 'SPLAIN THIS TO ME. NAO.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on September 08, 2011, 05:54:34 AM
I present you with Big Dumb Face. (https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Big_Dumb_Face)
Last night's song was It's Right in Here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPUvhxDcbv4) but I like Mighty Penis Laser (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kk99KcuAG7M) better.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ShoeEars on September 08, 2011, 06:22:14 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 08, 2011, 05:54:34 AM
I present you with Big Dumb Face. (https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Big_Dumb_Face)
Last night's song was It's Right in Here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPUvhxDcbv4) but I like Mighty Penis Laser (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kk99KcuAG7M) better.
No Comment. There are no words I can say to this.... What. So. Evar.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on September 08, 2011, 07:12:07 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 08, 2011, 05:54:34 AM
I present you with Big Dumb Face. (https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Big_Dumb_Face)
Last night's song was It's Right in Here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPUvhxDcbv4) but I like Mighty Penis Laser (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kk99KcuAG7M) better.

QuoteBig Dumb Face is a band formed by Wes Borland
:|
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on September 08, 2011, 05:13:32 PM
And? The music is still funny. Though my sense of humor is not always terribly mature.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on September 09, 2011, 09:22:44 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 08, 2011, 05:13:32 PM
And? The music is still funny. Though my sense of humor is not always terribly mature.

I listened. I was not a fan. But meh, whatever floats your boat. Personally, I'll take Joshua Michael over Wes Borland.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Disco Pickle on September 09, 2011, 02:28:55 PM
By an Irish hoodlum friend of mine I like to get drunk with:

"I love my kids so much I gave each of them their own mother."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on September 09, 2011, 03:40:23 PM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on September 09, 2011, 03:41:41 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 08, 2011, 05:54:34 AM
I present you with Big Dumb Face. (https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Big_Dumb_Face)
Last night's song was It's Right in Here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPUvhxDcbv4) but I like Mighty Penis Laser (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kk99KcuAG7M) better.

"Ich würde ja sagen ich war betrunken, aber dem ist leider nicht so."

means

"I would have said I was drunk, unfortunately this was not the case."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 11, 2011, 10:05:50 PM
Andris: Hey Suu.

Me: Hey, what's up?

Andris: I have a question for you...are you and Oarstroker a couple?

Me: Yes, we are.

Andris: Okay.

Me: ...why?

Andris: Just curious.

Me: I figured it was plainly obvious at War.

Andris: Oh, it was,I just wanted to make sure, because it's not on Facebook and all.

Me: Well, he can't put that he's in a relationship with me, or his ex-wife will probably block him from seeing his daughters.

Andris: Okay. Like I said, just curious.


:?

I fucking hate Facebook.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: PopeTom on September 11, 2011, 10:16:39 PM
Quote from: Suu on September 11, 2011, 10:05:50 PM
Andris: Hey Suu.

Me: Hey, what's up?

Andris: I have a question for you...are you and Oarstroker a couple?

Me: Yes, we are.

Andris: Okay.

Me: ...why?

Andris: Just curious.

Me: I figured it was plainly obvious at War.

Andris: Oh, it was,I just wanted to make sure, because it's not on Facebook and all.

Me: Well, he can't put that he's in a relationship with me, or his ex-wife will probably block him from seeing his daughters.

Andris: Okay. Like I said, just curious.


:?

I fucking hate Facebook.

If it's not on Facebook it's not real!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 11, 2011, 10:31:38 PM
He's not the first one to bring it up. Mine says, "In a Relationship", but no name. He can't change it, it's not that he doesn't want to, but if visitation rights between him and his kids are on the line because his ex is Psycho Brazilian 3000, then well...it ain't breaking my heart.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 12, 2011, 03:28:12 PM
Facebook Friend's Thread: Where were you 10 years ago on September 12th? What were you inspired to do?

Friend: I was inspired to learn the lyrics of America, the Beautiful.

Friend: I was volunteering with my local Red Cross.

Me: My restaurant donated food at a blood drive they were having at Tropicana Field, and I was inspired to hook up with a Major League Baseball player.

Friend: What? How?! That's not right...

Me: I chose wisely. :)

Friend: I don't understand why you would find that appropriate.

Me: Well, I thought it was pretty damn American of me.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 12, 2011, 03:39:39 PM
I was trying to come up with something really interesting and noble to have done, so in 10 years time when people asked "where were you on September 12, 2001" I could say "I was doing [X Noble Activity]" instead of just sitting around, watching 24 hour news and borrowing books from the library on the history of Afghanistan, like everyone else.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 12, 2011, 03:50:42 PM
For the record, I would like to make it known that it was my mom's idea that he take me out. I didn't think we'd actually start dating.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: PopeTom on September 12, 2011, 07:11:03 PM
Ten years ago on September 12th I gave $100 to the Red Cross.

I then went back to sleep because September 13th is my birthday and not having an all night bender on my birthday means the terrorists win.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 12, 2011, 10:50:25 PM
Do what must be done for God and Country.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on September 13, 2011, 02:03:55 AM
::Richter is at a LARP on 9/11::

Richter ::grabs random other player as we're escaping a dark unholy temple::  "HAVE YOU SEEN MY WIFE?  DID SHE MAKE IT OUT ALIVE?"

Other dude: "Wha...?"

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on September 13, 2011, 03:21:32 AM
Quote from: Richter on September 13, 2011, 02:03:55 AM
::Richter is at a LARP on 9/11::

Richter ::grabs random other player as we're escaping a dark unholy temple::  "HAVE YOU SEEN MY WIFE?  DID SHE MAKE IT OUT ALIVE?"

Other dude: "Wha...?"

:lulz: You are a truly terrible person, and that game is ALWAYS 2x more fun when you're around.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on September 13, 2011, 03:25:12 AM
Shit, thanks  :)

Eventually half the town will want my hide though.  My hair metal filk of the goals for the tainted-gloaming fight nearly did it.

Let's see how much gold you could get for selling me out, and we'll split the proceeds.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on September 13, 2011, 03:32:45 AM
Done. :lulz:  Of course the rest of us will be torched for demanding money instead of immediately handing you over to Righteousness.


on the drive back:

<after driving over yet another pothole>

Me: This car isn't going to last much longer if we keep this up. It was built for an America that could afford to fix its roads.

Mark: Oh my god that just made me feel incredibly fucking sad. What the hell.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on September 13, 2011, 03:34:06 AM
 :lulz:
Remind him that a terrorist who wanted to be EFFECTIVE would cause slow degradation of state infrastructure and education standards.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on September 13, 2011, 03:58:34 AM
oh holy shit you're such an asshole











:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 13, 2011, 05:27:11 AM
:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on September 13, 2011, 08:16:34 AM
:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on September 13, 2011, 04:56:32 PM
I don't remember what the lead-up was, but at the LARP this weekend Richter told me he had discovered how to fart in stereo.

I've been laughing about that for days.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 13, 2011, 10:40:31 PM
You need to come to Tavern next weekend, dude. NEED TO. Yes, it's an SCA event, but Richter and Oarstroker are having an Interpretive Dance-Off. I guarantee you will piss yourself.

Fuck, I need a bottle of Jameson. As is tradition.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 15, 2011, 05:22:39 PM
St. Dingbat of the Scissors: OMG we aren't even out of the fucking state of FL yet and Dad is being a fucking annoying backseat driver. Help!

Me: ...Are you texting me while driving?!

St. Dingbat of the Scissors: No.....maybe.

Me:  :x
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on September 17, 2011, 08:04:04 PM
(http://i1141.photobucket.com/albums/n595/Luna0219/PeeDee/Arizona.jpg)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on September 21, 2011, 03:26:05 AM
Out of context quote for the evening:

"YOU, she'll peg mercilessly."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 21, 2011, 01:08:53 PM
Quote from: Luna on September 21, 2011, 03:26:05 AM
Out of context quote for the evening:

"YOU, she'll peg mercilessly."

Stop talking about me at practice like that.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on September 21, 2011, 11:31:50 PM
Leln has done worse things to people's self worth with card games than most Middle Schools can boast.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on September 21, 2011, 11:35:07 PM
Quote from: Richter on September 21, 2011, 11:31:50 PM
Leln has done worse things to people's self worth with card games than most Middle Schools can boast.

I can see that.   :D
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 22, 2011, 04:13:09 AM
Quote from: Richter on September 21, 2011, 11:31:50 PM
Leln has done worse things to people's self worth with card games than most Middle Schools can boast.

Fucking pegged my ass in Cribbage.  :argh!:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on September 25, 2011, 02:02:36 AM
Me: I was opening a bottle of water between my legs in the car and squoze it. Boom! Water all up my crack.

Mr Squid: SURPRISE BIDET!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on September 25, 2011, 03:08:47 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on September 25, 2011, 05:13:12 AM
My totally gay friend whose bf is also totally gay and in the Air Force:
We're gonna go to Cattle Company to celebrate for ***** being able to come out!

Me:
Man, it sure must be nice that ***** can eat beef out in public now.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jasper on September 27, 2011, 07:39:09 PM
Friend in Seattle:  Do you have that feeling you get when you're in California?

Me:  Yeah.  It's almost as if people say "hella" incessantly, care too much about money, and get enough sunlight not to be pale and depressed!

Friend in Seattle:  What is dis "son lite" you speak of, outlander?

Me: Legends speak of a gravity powered fusion bomb in the sky, whose radiation at all spectra through the magnetisphere gives life to all. It is a ridiculous myth.

Friend in Seattle: I'm all for religious tolerance, but that's just goofy.

Me: They teach this stuff in classrooms, if you believe that.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on September 28, 2011, 06:57:19 PM
:lulz:

And I don't say Hella that often...more of a No Ca than So Cal thing...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jasper on September 28, 2011, 09:32:12 PM
My girlfriend does.   She's Bay Area, born and raised.  It's cute.  :)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 29, 2011, 08:50:58 PM
At the event this weekend, Richter wrote out indulgences, as is his right as a Holy Manâ„¢.

Me: *reads* "Something illegible...SATAN! And my penance is...Buy 4 cheeseburgers. DUDE, you KNOW I can't eat cheeseburgers!"

Richter: "That's why you buy them for me."

Me:  :|
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: trix on October 02, 2011, 09:41:58 PM
my friend Becky is driving down the highway:

Becky:  Look at all those people holding signs that say "Abortion kills children".
Becky:  Wait... isn't that the point?

Me:  :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 04, 2011, 10:41:03 PM
Polish lady I'm flirting with:  I wanted to be a CIA agent, when I was a little girl.
Me:  what a coincidence, I also wanted to be a CIA agent when I was a little girl.
Her:  Sadly, that will never happen, since I'm not American...
Me:  never give up on your dream.  Ahmad Wali Karzai worked with the CIA without being an American, and look how that worked out! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ahmed_Wali_Karzai#Assassination)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on October 05, 2011, 12:38:20 AM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on October 05, 2011, 06:59:41 PM
DAMN DUDE.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 06, 2011, 02:00:26 PM
We're going to have an argument about the quality of Karzai's teeth later, apparently (no, I don't know how I end up in these conversations either).

Anyway, from #discord

Quote(13:53:39)<ENKI-][>With a dreamlike power, he enters her life with dreamlike,hypnotic passion <-- dreamlike power as in he makes her teeth fall out?
(13:54:27)<Cain>quite possibly
(13:54:44)<Pixie>enki what are you smoking?
(13:54:46)<Cain>you should read the entire entry - it is a truly terrible episode, from the sound of it
(13:55:36)<Pixie>I'm lost
(13:55:49)<ENKI-][>i've probably seen the episode, if it's canon TNG
(13:55:51)<Cain>I linked to another terrible star trek episode, like two hours ago
(13:55:56)<Cain>Sub Rose
(13:56:01)<Cain>Sub Rosa*
(13:56:08)<Pixie>aah
(13:56:13)<Cain>one of the last season episodes, I believe
(13:56:35)<Cain>Dr Crusher gets it on with a sexy ghost who was seducing her nan
(13:56:36)<Pixie>ok imma go make some toast
(13:56:46)<Pixie>ahh that steamer
(13:56:49)<Payne_>oh shit
(13:56:49)<Cain>in a fake scottish planet
(13:56:53)<Payne_>I REMEMBER IT NOW
(13:57:01)<Payne_>FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
(13:57:04)<Cain>lol
(13:57:06)<Payne_>WHAT HAVE YOU DONE T ME CAIN
(13:57:20)<Pixie>you've gone and traumatised Payne, Cain
(13:57:32)<Cain>it was worth it, for that reaction
(13:57:43)<Pixie>lol
(13:57:54)* Pixie hugs payne
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on October 06, 2011, 02:07:20 PM
A fake Scottish planet??? hahahaha! :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 06, 2011, 02:08:43 PM
Groundskeeper Willie was in the episode as well.  Well, the guy who does his voice.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Payne on October 06, 2011, 03:44:38 PM
Quote[15:39] * Payne sets mode +v triplezero for #discord
[15:40] <@Payne> Trip, we were discussing how you've had a good day of posting today
[15:40] <@Pixie> hey Trip
[15:40] <@Payne> you win the Talking About You Behind Your Back (Positively!) In IRC Award
[15:40] <@Cram> yeah trip!
[15:41] <@Payne> whatever will you do with the prize money?
[15:42] <@Cain> he will lurk on IRC menacingly, without saying a word
[15:43] <@Pixie> he does that sometimes
[15:43] <@Payne> maybe he emptied his word bag all into PD today
[15:43] <@Payne> sometimes I empty my word bag by singing to myself in very stupid voices when no one is around to hear
[15:43] <@Cain> trip has exhausted his knowledge of the English language
[15:43] <+ENKI-][> he used up too many of his letters, so the only word he can spell is 'xyzzy' if somebody has a spare z to latch onto.
[15:44] <@Cram> triplezero you can borrow some of my letters
[15:44] <@Cain> which in this case is a slave boy purchased in Detroit, who does all his translating for him
[15:44] <@Cain> whip him harder Trip
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on October 06, 2011, 04:13:09 PM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on October 12, 2011, 02:58:28 AM
:lulz:



Youngest sister: You miss the screaming, don't you?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on October 12, 2011, 03:15:26 AM
"There is sewing shit everywhere!" Some lispy queen who came with his partner today to look at my half-packed messy apartment.

PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE HOLES IN THE CEILING OR THE BROKEN WINDOWS. THIS CHICK OBVIOUSLY SEWS FOR A LIVING! STOP THE PRESSES!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: PopeTom on October 12, 2011, 03:33:03 AM
Quote from: Suu on October 12, 2011, 03:15:26 AM
"There is sewing shit everywhere!"

If only you had gone to law school and specialized in cases involving people being injured by public works.

You could be Suu the sewer suing sewer.

:lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on October 12, 2011, 03:55:27 AM
Wow Tom, just...wow.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on October 12, 2011, 04:36:12 AM
"That fight would have gone a LOT differently if I'd been wearing my Tesla coil..."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on October 12, 2011, 04:39:10 AM
ZAP!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 12, 2011, 02:34:31 PM
FM-7-21-13 "The Soldier's Guide":

Quote"The Army's core values are loyalty, duty, respect, selfless service, honor, integrity and personal courage. They form the acronym LDRSHIP."

Me: clearly though, spelling is not a core value.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on October 12, 2011, 02:35:45 PM
Quote from: Cain on October 12, 2011, 02:34:31 PM
FM-7-21-13 "The Soldier's Guide":

Quote"The Army's core values are loyalty, duty, respect, selfless service, honor, integrity and personal courage. They form the acronym LDRSHIP."

Me: clearly though, spelling is not a core value.

The US military loves acronyms more than it loves its coffee.  No shit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 12, 2011, 02:37:28 PM
I think they'd had too much coffee when they wrote that sentence.

Imwritingsogoddamnfasticanaffordtomissoutentireletters!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on October 12, 2011, 02:50:10 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 12, 2011, 02:35:45 PM
Quote from: Cain on October 12, 2011, 02:34:31 PM
FM-7-21-13 "The Soldier's Guide":

Quote"The Army's core values are loyalty, duty, respect, selfless service, honor, integrity and personal courage. They form the acronym LDRSHIP."

Me: clearly though, spelling is not a core value.

The US military loves acronyms more than it loves its coffee.  No shit.

Definitely. Mom has to mentally decompress every time she comes home and remember what normal English words are, and if she writes an email about her week it tends to make not a lick of sense.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on October 12, 2011, 05:42:53 PM
She's USAF right? I could probably translate it for you.

Then again, I dunno... I felt like each squadron or unit had it's own code.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on October 13, 2011, 10:55:49 PM
Army. Usually we just respond with "wut?" and it gets clarified.

The nouns aren't so bad, since I either know them by now or having them spelled out makes it clear. It's when they use acronyms as verbs that I get thrown off.


FOR THOSE WHO DO NOT KNOW MUCH ABOUT THE ARMED SERVICES, This is how a typical email message within the Army goes:

"We PCS'd the WCH and alerted the NIBCOM to the situation. They HFG'd Captain Spunkenmyer's PRONIT until MIKF received a GITLO later that day."


^This is the formally accepted way of saying "We went for lunch at around 1:30 and then I had a poo."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on October 14, 2011, 02:16:09 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on October 17, 2011, 03:22:24 PM
QuoteI then realized I had an ambulatory cuisinart right next to my junk...

Some things are better without context.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 17, 2011, 10:03:26 PM
Quote from: Cainad on October 13, 2011, 10:55:49 PM
Army. Usually we just respond with "wut?" and it gets clarified.

The nouns aren't so bad, since I either know them by now or having them spelled out makes it clear. It's when they use acronyms as verbs that I get thrown off.


FOR THOSE WHO DO NOT KNOW MUCH ABOUT THE ARMED SERVICES, This is how a typical email message within the Army goes:

"We PCS'd the WCH and alerted the NIBCOM to the situation. They HFG'd Captain Spunkenmyer's PRONIT until MIKF received a GITLO later that day."


^This is the formally accepted way of saying "We went for lunch at around 1:30 and then I had a poo."

WUT???????? :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on October 17, 2011, 11:59:26 PM
You know it's true.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 18, 2011, 02:01:58 AM
LIES!!!!!

ALL OF OUR ACRONYMS MAKE PERFECT SENSE!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on October 18, 2011, 03:17:20 AM
Quote from: Donald Coyote on October 18, 2011, 02:01:58 AM
LIES!!!!!

ALL OF OUR ACRONYMS MAKE PERFECT SENSE!!!!!!!!!

But the only one you need is "BOHICA".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on October 18, 2011, 03:42:44 AM
(Hanging around with a bunch of sword wielding perverts, slashing stuff for fun.)

Richter: You know what the difference between a butcher and a serial killer is?  A hard on.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 18, 2011, 03:09:50 PM
(14:28:18)- Cram joined
(14:28:24)<Cram>weeeoooooo
(14:28:28)<Cram>been a hell of a morning already!
(14:29:52)<Cram>My boss was like, "Are you potentially interested in a position as reprint coordinator?"
(14:30:02)<Cram>I was like "would my title change?"
(14:30:04)<Cram>she said "no"
(14:30:14)<Cram>I said "would I get to renegotiate my salary?"
(14:30:17)<Cram>she said "no"
(14:30:29)<Cram>I said "Then what incentive are you offering me for taking on that degree of responsibility?"
(14:30:50)<Cram>and she was like, "Ah well... nothing like that I guess."
(14:30:54)<Cram>"ah then I'm not interested."
(14:32:02)<Cram>reaaalllllyyyy struggled to not drop that line from Office Space "If the only reason to work hard is not getting fired, you can expect people to work just hard enough to not get fired."
(14:32:11)<Cram>but that's realllllly not the kind of thing you should say to your boss :P

[...]

(15:02:55)<Cram>TIME TO APPLY FOR SOME MORE JOBS
(15:04:52)<Cain>hey Cram, I know of a place that is looking for a reprint coordinator
(15:05:05)<Cram>EAT SHITS
(15:05:08)<Cram>TWO OF THEM
(15:05:17)<Cram>what place is that?
(15:05:23)<Cram>is it my place?
(15:05:27)<Cram>EAT MY BUTT ON SUNDAY
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jasper on October 18, 2011, 03:28:55 PM
Yesterday;  I was at work, minding my own business.  Suddenly I get a text from my best friend:

"I hate you and I am going to set your eyebrows on fire."

I had no idea where that came from, or what inspired it all day until I talked to him later, and for some terrible reason being so hated for seemingly no reason made me unspeakably happy all day long.

Turns out it was because I sent him a link to eroticfalconry.com last night and had totally forgotten.  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on October 18, 2011, 11:42:33 PM
Quote from: Cain on October 18, 2011, 03:09:50 PM
(14:28:18)- Cram joined
(14:28:24)<Cram>weeeoooooo
(14:28:28)<Cram>been a hell of a morning already!
(14:29:52)<Cram>My boss was like, "Are you potentially interested in a position as reprint coordinator?"
(14:30:02)<Cram>I was like "would my title change?"
(14:30:04)<Cram>she said "no"
(14:30:14)<Cram>I said "would I get to renegotiate my salary?"
(14:30:17)<Cram>she said "no"
(14:30:29)<Cram>I said "Then what incentive are you offering me for taking on that degree of responsibility?"
(14:30:50)<Cram>and she was like, "Ah well... nothing like that I guess."
(14:30:54)<Cram>"ah then I'm not interested."
(14:32:02)<Cram>reaaalllllyyyy struggled to not drop that line from Office Space "If the only reason to work hard is not getting fired, you can expect people to work just hard enough to not get fired."
(14:32:11)<Cram>but that's realllllly not the kind of thing you should say to your boss :P

[...]

(15:02:55)<Cram>TIME TO APPLY FOR SOME MORE JOBS
(15:04:52)<Cain>hey Cram, I know of a place that is looking for a reprint coordinator
(15:05:05)<Cram>EAT SHITS
(15:05:08)<Cram>TWO OF THEM
(15:05:17)<Cram>what place is that?
(15:05:23)<Cram>is it my place?
(15:05:27)<Cram>EAT MY BUTT ON SUNDAY

This shit made my day.  Thank you all.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 19, 2011, 03:57:20 AM
Quote from: Jasper on October 18, 2011, 03:28:55 PM
Yesterday;  I was at work, minding my own business.  Suddenly I get a text from my best friend:

"I hate you and I am going to set your eyebrows on fire."

I had no idea where that came from, or what inspired it all day until I talked to him later, and for some terrible reason being so hated for seemingly no reason made me unspeakably happy all day long.

Turns out it was because I sent him a link to eroticfalconry.com last night and had totally forgotten.  :lol:

I love this.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pæs on October 19, 2011, 06:34:37 AM
Quote from: Richter on October 18, 2011, 11:42:33 PM
Quote from: Cain on October 18, 2011, 03:09:50 PM
(14:28:18)- Cram joined
(14:28:24)<Cram>weeeoooooo
(14:28:28)<Cram>been a hell of a morning already!
(14:29:52)<Cram>My boss was like, "Are you potentially interested in a position as reprint coordinator?"
(14:30:02)<Cram>I was like "would my title change?"
(14:30:04)<Cram>she said "no"
(14:30:14)<Cram>I said "would I get to renegotiate my salary?"
(14:30:17)<Cram>she said "no"
(14:30:29)<Cram>I said "Then what incentive are you offering me for taking on that degree of responsibility?"
(14:30:50)<Cram>and she was like, "Ah well... nothing like that I guess."
(14:30:54)<Cram>"ah then I'm not interested."
(14:32:02)<Cram>reaaalllllyyyy struggled to not drop that line from Office Space "If the only reason to work hard is not getting fired, you can expect people to work just hard enough to not get fired."
(14:32:11)<Cram>but that's realllllly not the kind of thing you should say to your boss :P

[...]

(15:02:55)<Cram>TIME TO APPLY FOR SOME MORE JOBS
(15:04:52)<Cain>hey Cram, I know of a place that is looking for a reprint coordinator
(15:05:05)<Cram>EAT SHITS
(15:05:08)<Cram>TWO OF THEM
(15:05:17)<Cram>what place is that?
(15:05:23)<Cram>is it my place?
(15:05:27)<Cram>EAT MY BUTT ON SUNDAY

This shit made my day.  Thank you all.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on October 19, 2011, 05:45:11 PM
"What if I don't want to get in the machine?"

"Then I'll have two big happy guys help you get comfortable."

"Um.  Okay."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 19, 2011, 07:09:25 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 19, 2011, 05:45:11 PM
"What if I don't want to get in the machine?"

"Then I'll have two big happy guys help you get comfortable."

"Um.  Okay."

Now, is this what they really said? Or is this what the brain converted it to?  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on October 19, 2011, 07:10:54 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 19, 2011, 07:09:25 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 19, 2011, 05:45:11 PM
"What if I don't want to get in the machine?"

"Then I'll have two big happy guys help you get comfortable."

"Um.  Okay."

Now, is this what they really said? Or is this what the brain converted it to?  :lulz:

My doctor and I have a very special relationship.

He wouldn't let me talk to the radiologist.  Says she wouldn't understand my humor.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 19, 2011, 07:20:35 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 19, 2011, 07:10:54 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 19, 2011, 07:09:25 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 19, 2011, 05:45:11 PM
"What if I don't want to get in the machine?"

"Then I'll have two big happy guys help you get comfortable."

"Um.  Okay."

Now, is this what they really said? Or is this what the brain converted it to?  :lulz:

My doctor and I have a very special relationship.

He wouldn't let me talk to the radiologist.  Says she wouldn't understand my humor.

HA!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on October 21, 2011, 12:27:13 AM
Gaddafi dies in the spangly gold underwear of his real life Hero, Peter Stringfellow.

Holly Pickett, a freelance photojournalist working in Surt, reported in a Twitter feed that she had seen Colonel Qaddafi's body in an ambulance.

"From the side door, I could see a bare chest with bullet wounds and a bloody hand. He was wearing gold-colored pants,"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on October 21, 2011, 02:45:17 PM
Payne   and the Brits are all fucking WAAAAAAAARGHGHGLBLBLGHBLGH about me becoming a Citizen, it seems
Payne   I think the citizenship test now involves actually going down on a RealDoll of margerat thatcher
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on October 22, 2011, 08:41:52 PM
Dad: I am at your niece's birthday party, and I feel like I'm on the set of Teen Mom.

Me: Um...(adopted sister) is 23...

Dad: But there's a bunch of young girls here with kids...

Me: They're probably older than you think, Dad.

Dad: I know, but they're all sitting at one table, texting, while their fucking kids run around. It's annoying.

Me: Get over it, Gramps.


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on October 23, 2011, 06:21:50 PM
"I'm gonna punch you so hard your vagina falls off."
-Mrs LMNO
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on October 24, 2011, 01:03:43 AM
Vegan cheese isn't cheese. It's a crime against humanity. - My vegetarian roommate.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on October 24, 2011, 05:19:09 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on October 23, 2011, 06:21:50 PM
"I'm gonna punch you so hard your vagina falls off."
-Mrs LMNO

:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 24, 2011, 01:55:19 PM
<Cain>"[Iran] is a brutal dictatorship. And it's seeking nuclear weapons while denying it's doing so. It's long since been time for the United States to speak to this regime in the language it understands—force."
<Cain>only because America cannot speak Farsi
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 24, 2011, 03:50:00 PM
and there goes my coffee.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on October 24, 2011, 04:04:48 PM
Quote from: Cain on October 24, 2011, 01:55:19 PM
<Cain>"[Iran] is a brutal dictatorship. And it’s seeking nuclear weapons while denying it’s doing so. It’s long since been time for the United States to speak to this regime in the language it understands—force."
<Cain>only because America cannot speak Farsi

...and you know how much they're paying for those who CAN speak Farsi?  $125K-250K for interpreters right now.  If you're willing to live on an airbase in Afghanistan, you get 6 figures, easily.  And according to my husband's interpreter cousin (he was over this weekend), you never have to leave base...

They also have simulation weekends in the CA/AZ desert, where you get paid $1200 for hanging out in an "insurgent" village, they put you up, give you food, etc., and you "work" for 3 days.  The whole "encampment" lasts like 5-6 days, but you're waiting around shooting the shit for most of that.

Crazy.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 24, 2011, 06:46:23 PM
Shit, I may start learning Farsi for that much. 

Also, another IRC rant from me

<Cain>"Audiences have been walking out of the Royal Shakespeare Company's production of Marat/Sade, which features scenes of nudity and torture."
<Cain>gosh
<Cain>who could've guessed
<Cain>a play named after the Marquis de Sade
<Cain>with scenes of nudity and torture
<Cain>they might as well have named it My Little Pony: Revolution is Magic
<Cain>that is how badly they have mislead audiences
<Cain>since 1964, no less
<Cain>"Some of the more shocking scenes include a gang rape and a character being tortured with a Taser."
<Cain>aka, just another day in Belmarsh Prison
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on October 27, 2011, 03:01:25 PM
here's a shitload of dirty limericsk, read out loud by yours truly:

http://kiwi6.com/file/okz53pa513
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pope Pixie Pickle on October 27, 2011, 09:20:04 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on October 27, 2011, 03:01:25 PM
here's a shitload of dirty limericsk, read out loud by yours truly:

http://kiwi6.com/file/okz53pa513

i LISTENED TO THAT EARLIER, IT WAS AWESOME.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on October 28, 2011, 03:40:33 AM
Luna:  The lock on the back hatch of my van is fixed, but I still can't get the side doors open.

Richter:  :lulz:

Luna:  :?

Richter: So... you'll have to get used to putting things in the rear.

Luna: ...oh damnit...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on October 28, 2011, 01:31:32 PM
Quote from: Richter on October 28, 2011, 03:40:33 AM
Luna:  The lock on the back hatch of my van is fixed, but I still can't get the side doors open.

Richter:  :lulz:

Luna:  :?

Richter: So... you'll have to get used to putting things in the rear.

Luna: ...oh damnit...
:argh!:
One of these days, Richter...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on October 28, 2011, 03:53:45 PM
:lulz:  :mittens: 
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on October 28, 2011, 03:56:12 PM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Payne on October 29, 2011, 12:01:46 PM
In reference to my contribution in Open Bar this morning:

"Of course, we all know Nigel is a Ferengi. It's why people like to stick their fingers in her ears"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 29, 2011, 04:05:15 PM
Quote from: The Payne on October 29, 2011, 12:01:46 PM
In reference to my contribution in Open Bar this morning:

"Of course, we all know Nigel is a Ferengi. It's why people like to stick their fingers in her ears"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!  :argh!:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 31, 2011, 03:51:39 AM
Villager uploads a pic of me from the party on facebook.

Mutual friend: what does it say on his forehead?
Villager (knowing the real answer): iowa.
Twid: it says "ha-satan" in hebrew.
Twid: though admittedly it looks quite like iowa.

For a quick comparison read the first paragraph on satan on wikipedia.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 31, 2011, 05:24:24 AM
Quote from: Nph. Twid. on October 31, 2011, 03:51:39 AM
Villager uploads a pic of me from the party on facebook.

Mutual friend: what does it say on his forehead?
Villager (knowing the real answer): iowa.
Twid: it says "ha-satan" in hebrew.
Twid: though admittedly it looks quite like iowa.

For a quick comparison read the first paragraph on satan on wikipedia.

I don't like reading about satan as it only makes more beloved my b, whom I cannot love. He is Satan, in a very real way.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 01, 2011, 02:36:48 PM
Dartmouth Fett: I just got to see [insert dumb movie title here] for free. The perks of dating a girl who works for a movie theatre.

Me: Why the fuck are you texting me with this?

DF: I was wondering if you saw the film yet.

Me: No, I haven't. The perks of dating the man I'm with is that I get free tattoos and really good, non-vanilla sex that lasts for hours. I don't think you can afford to play "Can You Top This".

DF: You're always one-step ahead. ALWAYS. STILL.

Me: FOREVER.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on November 01, 2011, 03:36:22 PM
 :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 01, 2011, 08:16:14 PM
Richter: It's 4:00pm, I'm bored, and I'm about to break into the Anne Frank Musical at work.

Me: Do it and report back with the results.

Richter: SRS. I have this stupid grin I can't get off my face, and I'm too close to point at the dishwasher or nuker while screaming, "SCHNELL!"

Me: Do it, and I will buy you a cheeseburger.

Richter: OH FUCK. Now the savings and wealth coach folks are here!

Me: IT'S NOW OR NEVER.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Placid Dingo on November 03, 2011, 11:54:14 AM
"You know how the Japanese people bombed Darwin? Why didn't we just, like, drop a nukebomb on them?"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on November 03, 2011, 01:06:20 PM
They ... how a we do a what now?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on November 03, 2011, 08:15:13 PM
"Occupy Wall Street Fighter. Let's see Madoff keep his money after three rounds with Ryu."   -My friend Karl
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 04, 2011, 03:20:49 PM
"We kinda accidentally didn't the whole thing." <--- My boss.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 04, 2011, 04:55:57 PM
Me: What's your stance on murder?

Boss: Better to do it yourself than hire someone else.

Me: How do you figure?

Boss: Well, if you do it yourself, you're committing an ethical and moral violation against just one person. If you hire someone, technically you're putting 2 people in check with their ethical and moral violations. By doing it by yourself, you're limiting the violations and stopping the spread of being unjust.

Me: Damnit. No hitman.

Boss: Nope. Do it yourself. May I recommend a weapon that's REALLY interesting?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on November 08, 2011, 09:21:33 PM
What do we want?

A CURE FOR TOURETTE'S

When do we want it?

CUNTS
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on November 09, 2011, 02:23:16 AM
Fun reading House  of Leaves at work.

"John I need to find some work to do around here.  Reading this is too much work and I need a break."

and

"Did you hear that call?"

"JOHN I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW I'M READING MY BOOK UPSIDE DOWN."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on November 09, 2011, 02:51:48 AM
"Facebook, Slagbook, meet just to Shagbook, sneaking about but then ya get caughtbook! Guiltbook, Shamebook, not ya real Namebook, in ya photos ya gorgeous but really yr a Mongbook! Prankbook, Skankbook what a fuckin Crankbook. Its gettin pretty scary cos its turning into Wankbook! Textbook, Sexbook, spying on your Exbook, someone 'likes' a photo and ya turn into a Pestbook! Scrapbook, Papbook catch the fuckin Clapbook, grab ya shitty iphone and add the shitty Appbook. Shitebook, Strifebook get a fucking Lifebook! Watch it if ya married cos they'll nick ya fuckin Wifebook! Creepbook, Peepbook when ya take a Leakbook! Yal even be Facebooking in ya fuckin Sleepbook!"

-Nurse East, blowing a gasket.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on November 09, 2011, 02:58:49 AM
Quote from: Richter on November 09, 2011, 02:51:48 AM
"Facebook, Slagbook, meet just to Shagbook, sneaking about but then ya get caughtbook! Guiltbook, Shamebook, not ya real Namebook, in ya photos ya gorgeous but really yr a Mongbook! Prankbook, Skankbook what a fuckin Crankbook. Its gettin pretty scary cos its turning into Wankbook! Textbook, Sexbook, spying on your Exbook, someone 'likes' a photo and ya turn into a Pestbook! Scrapbook, Papbook catch the fuckin Clapbook, grab ya shitty iphone and add the shitty Appbook. Shitebook, Strifebook get a fucking Lifebook! Watch it if ya married cos they'll nick ya fuckin Wifebook! Creepbook, Peepbook when ya take a Leakbook! Yal even be Facebooking in ya fuckin Sleepbook!"

-Nurse East, blowing a gasket.


Holy shit. :lulz: Quote of the fucking decade.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on November 09, 2011, 03:01:48 AM
I've read it 5 times, and giggle about something else each time.  She WROTE a satirical Escher painting.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on November 09, 2011, 03:53:26 AM
It's astoundingly Carlin-esque.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pæs on November 09, 2011, 04:12:03 AM
Quote from: Cainad on November 09, 2011, 02:58:49 AM
Quote from: Richter on November 09, 2011, 02:51:48 AM
"Facebook, Slagbook, meet just to Shagbook, sneaking about but then ya get caughtbook! Guiltbook, Shamebook, not ya real Namebook, in ya photos ya gorgeous but really yr a Mongbook! Prankbook, Skankbook what a fuckin Crankbook. Its gettin pretty scary cos its turning into Wankbook! Textbook, Sexbook, spying on your Exbook, someone 'likes' a photo and ya turn into a Pestbook! Scrapbook, Papbook catch the fuckin Clapbook, grab ya shitty iphone and add the shitty Appbook. Shitebook, Strifebook get a fucking Lifebook! Watch it if ya married cos they'll nick ya fuckin Wifebook! Creepbook, Peepbook when ya take a Leakbook! Yal even be Facebooking in ya fuckin Sleepbook!"

-Nurse East, blowing a gasket.


Holy shit. :lulz: Quote of the fucking decade.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on November 09, 2011, 02:37:04 PM
Quote from: Richter on November 09, 2011, 02:51:48 AM
"Facebook, Slagbook, meet just to Shagbook, sneaking about but then ya get caughtbook! Guiltbook, Shamebook, not ya real Namebook, in ya photos ya gorgeous but really yr a Mongbook! Prankbook, Skankbook what a fuckin Crankbook. Its gettin pretty scary cos its turning into Wankbook! Textbook, Sexbook, spying on your Exbook, someone 'likes' a photo and ya turn into a Pestbook! Scrapbook, Papbook catch the fuckin Clapbook, grab ya shitty iphone and add the shitty Appbook. Shitebook, Strifebook get a fucking Lifebook! Watch it if ya married cos they'll nick ya fuckin Wifebook! Creepbook, Peepbook when ya take a Leakbook! Yal even be Facebooking in ya fuckin Sleepbook!"

-Nurse East, blowing a gasket.

Awesome - who is this Nurse East? wanna repost that
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 09, 2011, 04:57:14 PM
Quote from: Richter on November 09, 2011, 02:51:48 AM
"Facebook, Slagbook, meet just to Shagbook, sneaking about but then ya get caughtbook! Guiltbook, Shamebook, not ya real Namebook, in ya photos ya gorgeous but really yr a Mongbook! Prankbook, Skankbook what a fuckin Crankbook. Its gettin pretty scary cos its turning into Wankbook! Textbook, Sexbook, spying on your Exbook, someone 'likes' a photo and ya turn into a Pestbook! Scrapbook, Papbook catch the fuckin Clapbook, grab ya shitty iphone and add the shitty Appbook. Shitebook, Strifebook get a fucking Lifebook! Watch it if ya married cos they'll nick ya fuckin Wifebook! Creepbook, Peepbook when ya take a Leakbook! Yal even be Facebooking in ya fuckin Sleepbook!"

-Nurse East, blowing a gasket.

She is fucking awesome.

Why is she being replaced in the monastery by Queen Vapid and her cats, again?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on November 09, 2011, 11:14:49 PM
If I could explain everything, I'd be published, and famous.

Also, she got it form someone, still trying to get the orig. author.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on November 10, 2011, 02:42:02 AM
Quote from: Richter on November 09, 2011, 11:14:49 PM
If I could explain everything, I'd be published, and famous.

Also, she got it form someone, still trying to get the orig. author.

Hey, you ARE famous.  I saw your picture on the wall, just the other day, down at the post office...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 10, 2011, 03:29:39 AM
Quote from: Luna on November 10, 2011, 02:42:02 AM
Quote from: Richter on November 09, 2011, 11:14:49 PM
If I could explain everything, I'd be published, and famous.

Also, she got it form someone, still trying to get the orig. author.

Hey, you ARE famous.  I saw your picture on the wall, just the other day, down at the post office...

:spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on November 10, 2011, 12:12:59 PM
Quote from: Suu on November 10, 2011, 03:29:39 AM
Quote from: Luna on November 10, 2011, 02:42:02 AM
Quote from: Richter on November 09, 2011, 11:14:49 PM
If I could explain everything, I'd be published, and famous.

Also, she got it form someone, still trying to get the orig. author.

Hey, you ARE famous.  I saw your picture on the wall, just the other day, down at the post office...

:spittake:
:thanks:

Of course, I will be paying for that comment at practice tonight.  Note to self; extra padding.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 10, 2011, 02:10:42 PM
I think Bob and I are going to have a night alone in the corner. With a great sword.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 10, 2011, 08:23:59 PM
Byron the Steampunk: You know those dildo ray guns they sell online? I bet you could make an awesome holster for one out of leather straps and a fleshlight.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on November 10, 2011, 09:18:44 PM
Quote from: Suu on November 10, 2011, 08:23:59 PM
Byron the Steampunk: You know those dildo ray guns they sell online? I bet you could make an awesome holster for one out of leather straps and a fleshlight.



:baby:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on November 11, 2011, 01:37:06 AM
:lulz:


On the way home, the stepdad had talk radio on and this caught my attention:
"What's more important - football or morality? A weighty question, for sure. What is more important - football or our moral values? Call in at [local radio show number] and tell us."


In his defense, his personal response was "THIS IS APPALLING."

edited for grammarz
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on November 11, 2011, 02:24:28 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on November 11, 2011, 01:37:06 AM
:lulz:


On the way home, the stepdad had talk radio on and this caught my attention:
"What's more important - football or morality? A weighty question, for sure. What is more important - football or our moral values? Call in at [local radio show number] and tell us."


In his defense, his personal response was "THIS IS APPALLING."

edited for grammarz

What the fuck kind of question is that?  It's only a few weeks to the superbowl.  FFS.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:28:58 AM
It's probably about Penn State and the coach who got fired because he knew his 2d in command was raping boys in the locker room.  For years.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on November 11, 2011, 02:30:21 AM
^ Yep.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on November 11, 2011, 02:31:09 AM
Quote from: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:28:58 AM
It's probably about Penn State and the coach who got fired because he knew his 2d in command was raping boys in the locker room.  For years.

College ball isn't football, and doesn't count.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:47:23 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 11, 2011, 02:31:09 AM
Quote from: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:28:58 AM
It's probably about Penn State and the coach who got fired because he knew his 2d in command was raping boys in the locker room.  For years.

College ball isn't football, and doesn't count.

No, but it speaks to the depravity that is the moral sinkhole of Conservative talk radio that they'd even DEBATE the rape of young boys vs. a coach's long standing career.

I mean...really?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on November 11, 2011, 02:55:16 AM
The host was absolutely appalled by the whole thing, actually, but yeah, moral sinkhole that he even seriously asked the question of his listerner.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:57:54 AM
Uh, he ACTED appalled.  I don't trust radio hosts any further than I can throw 'em.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on November 11, 2011, 02:59:50 AM
Point.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on November 11, 2011, 03:00:03 AM
Quote from: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:47:23 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 11, 2011, 02:31:09 AM
Quote from: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:28:58 AM
It's probably about Penn State and the coach who got fired because he knew his 2d in command was raping boys in the locker room.  For years.

College ball isn't football, and doesn't count.

No, but it speaks to the depravity that is the moral sinkhole of Conservative talk radio that they'd even DEBATE the rape of young boys vs. a coach's long standing career.

I mean...really?

You DID hear what Dirty Ricky Santorum said about that, right?

QuoteSantorum, a 1980 Penn State graduate, defended Paterno in an ABC News interview, saying he hoped the spreading sex-abuse scandal would not damage a coach who "served in such distinction for all these years."

http://blog.seattlepi.com/seattlepolitics/2011/11/09/santorum-angel-award-for-psus-sandusky/
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on November 11, 2011, 03:03:48 AM
:vom: :vom: :vom: Wow.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on November 11, 2011, 03:04:49 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on November 11, 2011, 03:03:48 AM
:vom: :vom: :vom: Wow.

"Republican".

By definition, they're perverts.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on November 11, 2011, 03:33:15 AM
Richter: My Viking long car only has a 4 speed transmission.  The "5th" gear is an overdrive.  It's a christian science 5 speed.

Suu: Right?

Richter: seriously.  I hit the "5th" button, it put's the tazer to Mary Baker Eddy's ass and she starts peddling.

Luna + Suu:  :lulz:

Suu YOUR BRAIN.  HOW does it work?

Richter: Fucking.  Magnets.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 11, 2011, 04:34:00 AM
That was great moments in sports. Right there.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on November 12, 2011, 06:19:11 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 11, 2011, 03:00:03 AM
Quote from: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:47:23 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 11, 2011, 02:31:09 AM
Quote from: Jenne on November 11, 2011, 02:28:58 AM
It's probably about Penn State and the coach who got fired because he knew his 2d in command was raping boys in the locker room.  For years.

College ball isn't football, and doesn't count.

No, but it speaks to the depravity that is the moral sinkhole of Conservative talk radio that they'd even DEBATE the rape of young boys vs. a coach's long standing career.

I mean...really?

You DID hear what Dirty Ricky Santorum said about that, right?

QuoteSantorum, a 1980 Penn State graduate, defended Paterno in an ABC News interview, saying he hoped the spreading sex-abuse scandal would not damage a coach who "served in such distinction for all these years."

http://blog.seattlepi.com/seattlepolitics/2011/11/09/santorum-angel-award-for-psus-sandusky/

Because apparently gay sex is OK as long as it's non-consensual.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on November 13, 2011, 12:52:44 AM
Quote(00:48:07)<Cain>blah, still writing about Soviets
(00:48:11)<Cain>have to stop though
(00:48:17)<Cain>for hot chocolate, maybe?
(00:48:21)<Cain>or yoghurt?
(00:48:25)<Cain>have not yet decided
(00:48:33)<Cain>no, I have, fuck it.  hot chocolate
(00:50:18)<Cain>see that?  that is decisive leadership
(00:50:35)<Cain>if the Mensheviks could have been as decisive as me, there would've been no Soviet Union
(00:50:38)<Cain>and thus, no Nazis
(00:50:42)<Cain>and so, no WWII
(00:51:03)<Cain>I basically would've made the 20th century much better, though my decisiveness for hot chocolate.
(00:51:13)<Cain>eat that counterfactual history, Harry Turtledove

I get kinda strange after too much caffeine/writing...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on November 13, 2011, 03:35:21 AM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on November 13, 2011, 11:59:35 AM
Quote from: Cain on November 13, 2011, 12:52:44 AM
Quote(00:48:07)<Cain>blah, still writing about Soviets
(00:48:11)<Cain>have to stop though
(00:48:17)<Cain>for hot chocolate, maybe?
(00:48:21)<Cain>or yoghurt?
(00:48:25)<Cain>have not yet decided
(00:48:33)<Cain>no, I have, fuck it.  hot chocolate
(00:50:18)<Cain>see that?  that is decisive leadership
(00:50:35)<Cain>if the Mensheviks could have been as decisive as me, there would've been no Soviet Union
(00:50:38)<Cain>and thus, no Nazis
(00:50:42)<Cain>and so, no WWII
(00:51:03)<Cain>I basically would've made the 20th century much better, though my decisiveness for hot chocolate.
(00:51:13)<Cain>eat that counterfactual history, Harry Turtledove

I get kinda strange after too much caffeine/writing...

:lulz: :mittens:

This also proves that chocolate sprinkle yoghurt is for Nazi Communists.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 13, 2011, 03:09:23 PM
Wow.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 13, 2011, 03:56:40 PM
Roommate sends me this Facebook IM:

Quotei'm about to make so many pancakes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You like pancakes?
I'd come out and talk to you right now, but I dont have pants on..
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: PopeTom on November 14, 2011, 09:16:30 PM
PopeTom: ...but I'm sure that eventually you'll find someone who will have gallons of love for you.
Friend: Gallons?  I'm not sure that's something you would measure love in.
PopeTom: Well, just for the men.
Friend: What about the women?
PopeTom: I'm not sure what the unit of measure would be for a woman's love.
PopeTom: Pounds of pressure per square inch?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on November 14, 2011, 09:52:00 PM
Quote from: PopeTom on November 14, 2011, 09:16:30 PM
PopeTom: ...but I'm sure that eventually you'll find someone who will have gallons of love for you.
Friend: Gallons?  I'm not sure that's something you would measure love in.
PopeTom: Well, just for the men.
Friend: What about the women?
PopeTom: I'm not sure what the unit of measure would be for a woman's love.
PopeTom: Pounds of pressure per square inch?

:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 15, 2011, 06:05:04 PM
From Mom: What's on your mind?

Me: Writing a paper, writing my book, revising my history project, cleaning my house, sewing a costume, and still trying to forget about yet another douchebag. You?

Mom: Just relaxing. We cleaned your sister's room yesterday. No shit, she has a floor!

Me: That's not possible. I also need to clean my room, but at least my stuff is still in boxes.

Sister: Pickles.


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on November 17, 2011, 12:25:06 AM
"My belt buckle fell on it, so the lens is kinda cracked..."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on November 19, 2011, 12:52:38 PM
Dartmouth Fett: "Good morning! It's SMF! Are you excited? I can't wait to see you!"

Me: "I hope you don't mind doing it with one eye, then. The other one may end up being swollen shut by the end of the day."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on November 21, 2011, 05:17:34 AM
Jeebus luvin FB friend: He's God all by Himself. <3

Me: He must be lonely. He need a girlfriend. Kali is single, I hear. Plus she's smokin'! http://i.imgur.com/HcG65.jpg
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on November 21, 2011, 07:00:45 AM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on November 29, 2011, 05:57:46 PM
The one sure way to make yourself unpopular in the United States these days is to mention the fact that Christianity and Democracy have been among the worst disasters to ever befall the human race.       -RAW (http://rawilson.wordpress.com/2007/06/17/undoing-yourself/)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on November 29, 2011, 08:32:16 PM
"A journalist is a person who makes a living from not being able to write." - Jens Bjørneboe (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jens_Bj%C3%B8rneboe)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on November 29, 2011, 08:38:10 PM
Especially true in the case of Thomas Friedman

http://www.nypress.com/article-11419-flathead.html

QuoteI think it was about five months ago that Press editor Alex Zaitchik whispered to me in the office hallway that Thomas Friedman had a new book coming out. All he knew about it was the title, but that was enough; he approached me with the chilled demeanor of a British spy who has just discovered that Hitler was secretly buying up the world's manganese supply. Who knew what it meant but one had to assume the worst

"It's going to be called The Flattening," he whispered. Then he stood there, eyebrows raised, staring at me, waiting to see the effect of the news when it landed. I said nothing.

It turned out Alex had bad information; the book that ultimately came out would be called The World Is Flat. It didn't matter. Either version suggested the same horrifying possibility. Thomas Friedman in possession of 500 pages of ruminations on the metaphorical theme of flatness would be a very dangerous thing indeed. It would be like letting a chimpanzee loose in the NORAD control room; even the best-case scenario is an image that could keep you awake well into your 50s.

So I tried not to think about it. But when I heard the book was actually coming out, I started to worry. Among other things, I knew I would be asked to write the review. The usual ratio of Friedman criticism is 2:1, i.e., two human words to make sense of each single word of Friedmanese. Friedman is such a genius of literary incompetence that even his most innocent passages invite feature-length essays. I'll give you an example, drawn at random from The World Is Flat. On page 174, Friedman is describing a flight he took on Southwest Airlines from Baltimore to Hartford, Connecticut. (Friedman never forgets to name the company or the brand name; if he had written The Metamorphosis, Gregor Samsa would have awoken from uneasy dreams in a Sealy Posturepedic.) Here's what he says:

QuoteI stomped off, went through security, bought a Cinnabon, and glumly sat at the back of the B line, waiting to be herded on board so that I could hunt for space in the overhead bins.

Forget the Cinnabon. Name me a herd animal that hunts. Name me one.

This would be a small thing were it not for the overall pattern. Thomas Friedman does not get these things right even by accident. It's not that he occasionally screws up and fails to make his metaphors and images agree. It's that he always screws it up. He has an anti-ear, and it's absolutely infallible; he is a Joyce or a Flaubert in reverse, incapable of rendering even the smallest details without genius. The difference between Friedman and an ordinary bad writer is that an ordinary bad writer will, say, call some businessman a shark and have him say some tired, uninspired piece of dialogue: Friedman will have him spout it. And that's guaranteed, every single time. He never misses.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: kingyak on November 29, 2011, 09:24:39 PM
http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/blogs/taibblog/caption-contest-we-have-a-winner-20111017#ixzz1f8FE91Zj (http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/blogs/taibblog/caption-contest-we-have-a-winner-20111017#ixzz1f8FE91Zj)

Quote
Anyway, this prize is going to the first reader who completes the following internet scavenger hunt. Just submit, in the comments section, links to the following:

    1) Find a mixed metaphor in a newspaper column not written by Thomas Friedman.

    2) A YouTube clip involving a politician and a farm animal. This does not need to be sexual in nature.

    3) An Islamic website offering an instruction on the permissibility of an obscure practice. For instance, a solid submission would be a link to a page giving instructions to Muslims on whether or not it is permissible to perform an autopsy on a circus clown.


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on November 29, 2011, 09:31:36 PM
I actually bought that book (The World is Flat) for one or two dollars in NYC last month because I needed something to read, and I thought I recognized the name from somewhere. Needless to say, I never finished reading it and I don't intend to do so either.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 01, 2011, 08:19:46 PM
St. Dingbat: So, for the Ugly Sweater Party this year, I'm making a Charlie the Unicorn ugly sweater.

Me: I...I can't even begin to describe how amazing that is...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on December 03, 2011, 02:30:59 AM
"If you're an American citizen and you betray your country, you're not going to be given a lawyer." Senator Lindsey Graham
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 03, 2011, 02:31:19 AM
Quote from: Net on December 03, 2011, 02:30:59 AM
"If you're an American citizen and you betray your country, you're not going to be given a lawyer." Senator Lindsey Graham

heeeee
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 03, 2011, 02:45:13 AM
Quote from: Net on December 03, 2011, 02:30:59 AM
"If you're an American citizen and you betray your country, you're not going to be given a lawyer." Senator Lindsey Graham

I really want to rub my ex's nose in it, except part of my victory in being right is that also right now he is busy losing his house.

It's a bit of a bitter victory.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 04, 2011, 04:45:30 PM
Sister: What are you getting dad for Christmas?

Me: The "Baa Baa Black Sheep" Season 1 boxset.

Sister: Goddamnit. I have no idea what to get the Fat Fuck. (Yes, we really do refer to my father as such.)

Me: I'd say get him season 2, but you probably have no memory of the show. I was really little when we watched reruns together.

Sister: Yeah, I've never heard of it.

Me: I think Anthony was a baby, that means you didn't exist yet.

Sister: Thank you for making me feel inadequately young.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 05, 2011, 02:45:18 PM
Last night:

2 newbs in front of me: "So like, are these guys Satanic?"

Me: "Um. NO."

Newbs: "But I thought goth bands were all like, dark and stuff."

Me: "VNV are obvious Irish Catholics. They put God and guilt in every other song."

Newb 1: "But they swear!"

Me: "You obviously missed where I said 'Irish'."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 08, 2011, 05:59:56 PM
My sister's Facebook status: So I was just cutting this old man's hair and apparently, the blacks just became citizens about 10 years ago.

:facepalm:

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on December 08, 2011, 11:26:06 PM
EoC:  Don't slap my ass like I'm some piece of meat.
GF:  But you are.  You're made of meat.  You're much more than meat, but meat is part of what you are.

***

Boss:  EoC, you aren't allowed to talk to me anymore.  You need something from me, you go through Steve.
EoC:  Usually boss, you talk to someone's face.  Not their asshole.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 09, 2011, 12:42:56 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 08, 2011, 11:26:06 PM

Boss:  EoC, you aren't allowed to talk to me anymore.  You need something from me, you go through Steve.
EoC:  Usually boss, you talk to someone's face.  Not their asshole.

This gets the TGRR stamp of approval.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on December 09, 2011, 12:51:14 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 09, 2011, 12:42:56 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 08, 2011, 11:26:06 PM

Boss:  EoC, you aren't allowed to talk to me anymore.  You need something from me, you go through Steve.
EoC:  Usually boss, you talk to someone's face.  Not their asshole.

This gets the TGRR stamp of approval.

I'm honored.  Also, Steve was in the room.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 09, 2011, 01:46:16 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 08, 2011, 11:26:06 PM
EoC:  Don't slap my ass like I'm some piece of meat.
GF:  But you are.  You're made of meat.  You're much more than meat, but meat is part of what you are.

***

Boss:  EoC, you aren't allowed to talk to me anymore.  You need something from me, you go through Steve.
EoC:  Usually boss, you talk to someone's face.  Not their asshole.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: infinityshock on December 09, 2011, 02:38:54 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 08, 2011, 11:26:06 PM
EoC:  Usually boss, you talk to someone's face.  Not their asshole.

so...is 'steve' his pet name for his pooper and he was propositioning you?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 09, 2011, 03:18:55 AM
Quote from: infinityshock on December 09, 2011, 02:38:54 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 08, 2011, 11:26:06 PM
EoC:  Usually boss, you talk to someone's face.  Not their asshole.

so...is 'steve' his pet name for his pooper and he was propositioning you?

U MAD, DOG?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: infinityshock on December 09, 2011, 04:19:36 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 09, 2011, 03:18:55 AM
Quote from: infinityshock on December 09, 2011, 02:38:54 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 08, 2011, 11:26:06 PM
EoC:  Usually boss, you talk to someone's face.  Not their asshole.

so...is 'steve' his pet name for his pooper and he was propositioning you?

U MAD, DOG?

maybe a little bit envious.  slightly jealous.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 09, 2011, 04:27:55 AM
Quote from: infinityshock on December 09, 2011, 04:19:36 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 09, 2011, 03:18:55 AM
Quote from: infinityshock on December 09, 2011, 02:38:54 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 08, 2011, 11:26:06 PM
EoC:  Usually boss, you talk to someone's face.  Not their asshole.

so...is 'steve' his pet name for his pooper and he was propositioning you?

U MAD, DOG?

maybe a little bit envious.  slightly jealous.

U MAD
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 09, 2011, 06:39:29 AM
Twid: (To the bartender) A Dhominic, ta me go maith... (Dominic, I'm good)
Dominic: Yeah?
Twid: Yeah. Is docha.... ta meisce orm. Go raibh maith agat. (It's probable..... I'm drunk. Thank you.)
Dominic: Oiche mhaith (Goodnight)
Twid: Oiche mhaith.

Twid,
Loves living i mBoston.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 09, 2011, 02:56:06 PM
Lol, you speak Blarney.


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: infinityshock on December 10, 2011, 04:48:36 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 09, 2011, 04:27:55 AM
U MAD

now im hard. 

open wide so you can fix my dilemma.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on December 10, 2011, 02:03:30 PM
Nurse East: (About the cat climbing up my pants): That cat is nuts.

Richter: Without these cats, I would never hve reason to scream, "No, not my ass" at 7:30 AM.

Nurse East:  I don;t know if I should say poor you or poor cats.

Richter: this is MY ass we're talking about.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on December 10, 2011, 02:17:10 PM
Herb: So what you up to today?

Richter: Gaming in Fall River

Nurse East: You're seeing a gay man in Fall River?!

Richter:  ..why must they step....  Yes.  I am.  We've got our hand on some amyls and a bucket of crisco.  We're going to be double fisting all day.

Nurse East:  :x

Richter: DO never test.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on December 10, 2011, 02:22:39 PM
Quote from: Richter on December 10, 2011, 02:17:10 PM
Herb: So what you up to today?

Richter: Gaming in Fall River

Nurse East: You're seeing a gay man in Fall River?!

Richter:  ..why must they step....  Yes.  I am.  We've got our hand on some amyls and a bucket of crisco.  We're going to be double fisting all day.

Nurse East:  :x

Richter: DO never test.

:peedee:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 10, 2011, 03:45:34 PM
Quote from: Richter on December 10, 2011, 02:03:30 PM
Nurse East: (About the cat climbing up my pants): That cat is nuts.

Richter: Without these cats, I would never hve reason to scream, "No, not my ass" at 7:30 AM.

Nurse East:  I don;t know if I should say poor you or poor cats.

Richter: this is MY ass we're talking about.

Which cat? Rin? She's saying, "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS HOUSE, UNCLE RICHTER! PLEASE!"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 10, 2011, 05:18:33 PM
Mom: Your sister just reminded me that she's turning 24 next month.

Me: Well yeah, I knew that. I'm turning 30 in August, you know.

Mom: Yeah, but I know you're old. You were born old, I'm just having a hard time grasping that my baby is turning 24.

Me: Thank you for making me feel ancient.

Mom: Oh, it's just getting started!

Me: YOU'RE TURNING 50!!

Mom: A 50 year old who can still party with her kids, who are all old enough to buy her booze and appreciate good music, that's what. Oh, and thankfully not a grandmother, yet. I'm too fucking young for that shit.

Me:  :?

Mom: It'll make more sense in 20 years.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on December 11, 2011, 04:46:24 AM
I was walking past a Charity shop earlier today, and something caught my eye. So I went in, and found this  golden apple on a shelf by the window. "Sweet" I thought. Looked at the price, and it was only £1.50.
So I picked it up, and went to the cash desk to buy it.  

(http://i748.photobucket.com/albums/xx128/ChuckFukmuk/Temple/Photo_00022.jpg)

There's this old woman in front of me, buying about twenty woollen hats for her rabble of Grandchildren at Christmas. And she's going "And this one's for our Danny, because he's got a scarf that colour, the green one's for our Sheila's oldest, Zacky, he's got a big fat head . . . . .  " and just went rattling on and on. The Woman serving her was even older. She must have been about 160 yrs old, and was having Tech issues with the Till. "I can't remember what I pressed now Dais," She said.

Then she started adding up the figures on paper and like, I'm in a hurry. But I'm nothing if not the very epitome of helpful patience, so I stopped glowering at the back of the first old bag's head, and asked the technically challenged Cashier if maybe giving the Till "A bit of a Bang" with something heavy might help.

Oooh, no" She said. "I shul prolly get saack if I starts banging sruff about, . .   . . . Again".    She laughed. The good natured, but slightly cracked laugh of a far younger Woman  
"S OK moi Luvver, nurly done"
So I smile at her, but my mind is screaming "Get a fucking move on you useless old Cow".
She took the Apple, and said "Sorry to keep you waitin' love, but but Daisy dún't half go on"

"Don't bother yourself" I said.  "It's not like I'm in a hurry or anything" I lied.
"It's a bit scratched on the bottom there" she pointed out a tiny fleck of of that had come off.gilding. "Doesn't matter" I said. "Whenever I see a Golden Apple, I just have to buy it".
She cocked her wizened head to the side for a second, and said "Oh, I understand, I'm just the same myself."                                  Then she gave me my change, and handed me the bag,

with the Apple in it. And here's the bit that  totally blew me away.
As she handed it over, she leaned in close and said "Hail Eris"
My jaw hit yhe floor.But I managed a quick "All Hail Discordiq"  response in as I  left.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on December 11, 2011, 05:09:20 AM
Holy shit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on December 11, 2011, 05:32:57 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on December 11, 2011, 07:10:19 AM
Brilliant. You should drop off some PosterGASM material anonymously.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on December 11, 2011, 08:24:37 AM
I was thinking maybe spiking some of their second hand books with some gummed flyleaf "Ex Libris" stickers with something appropriate
on them. They (for some reason IDK )have always) sold loads of Knitting patterns. So I thought of perhaps slipping some bogus "Chaos patterns" in the folders, with Markoff chainsticthes, or Practical String Theory for Brother Knitting machines.
   
One night, about ten years ago, someone left a big sack of almost dried out but not quite dry Starfish outside the shop, as a donation.
(Although what the fuck whoever it was thought they were going to do with 400 stinky Starfish still eludes me)

Anyway, we distributed them all around the Town centre, Mad Fishonger style. Outside shops, in the Bus stops,  Phone boxes, Cashpoint Machines, gathered around drain covers, pushed a couple through the Police Station letterbox, in the Pie shop window, outside the Cinema, all over the place. By the time the sun came up, the Town had been invaded by dead Starfish. And by 10am, it stank. People were finding them everywhere too. On their car roofs, in the Town Fountain,  Hotel & Bank Lobbys. But yeah, that was the same shop.  Last year, they were the first shop to infect Town with Vuvuzelas too. 2012 seems to be odds on for being an 'Escalation' year. Must bet time to ramp up the ante.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on December 11, 2011, 11:30:43 AM
Quote from: BadBeast on December 11, 2011, 04:46:24 AM
I was walking past a Charity shop earlier today, and something caught my eye. So I went in, and found this  golden apple on a shelf by the window. "Sweet" I thought. Looked at the price, and it was only £1.50.
So I picked it up, and went to the cash desk to buy it.  

(http://i748.photobucket.com/albums/xx128/ChuckFukmuk/Temple/Photo_00022.jpg)

There's this old woman in front of me, buying about twenty woollen hats for her rabble of Grandchildren at Christmas. And she's going "And this one's for our Danny, because he's got a scarf that colour, the green one's for our Sheila's oldest, Zacky, he's got a big fat head . . . . .  " and just went rattling on and on. The Woman serving her was even older. She must have been about 160 yrs old, and was having Tech issues with the Till. "I can't remember what I pressed now Dais," She said.

Then she started adding up the figures on paper and like, I'm in a hurry. But I'm nothing if not the very epitome of helpful patience, so I stopped glowering at the back of the first old bag's head, and asked the technically challenged Cashier if maybe giving the Till "A bit of a Bang" with something heavy might help.

Oooh, no" She said. "I shul prolly get saack if I starts banging sruff about, . .   . . . Again".    She laughed. The good natured, but slightly cracked laugh of a far younger Woman  
"S OK moi Luvver, nurly done"
So I smile at her, but my mind is screaming "Get a fucking move on you useless old Cow".
She took the Apple, and said "Sorry to keep you waitin' love, but but Daisy dún't half go on"

"Don't bother yourself" I said.  "It's not like I'm in a hurry or anything" I lied.
"It's a bit scratched on the bottom there" she pointed out a tiny fleck of of that had come off.gilding. "Doesn't matter" I said. "Whenever I see a Golden Apple, I just have to buy it".
She cocked her wizened head to the side for a second, and said "Oh, I understand, I'm just the same myself."                                  Then she gave me my change, and handed me the bag,

with the Apple in it. And here's the bit that  totally blew me away.
As she handed it over, she leaned in close and said "Hail Eris"
My jaw hit yhe floor.But I managed a quick "All Hail Discordiq"  response in as I  left.

Wow.

:potd:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 11, 2011, 06:32:26 PM
You're in Bournemouth, right?  I might have to visit that shop when I'm back down in Dorset sometime, and drop a few references and see what happens.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on December 11, 2011, 10:24:51 PM
Quote from: Cain on December 11, 2011, 06:32:26 PM
You're in Bournemouth, right?  I might have to visit that shop when I'm back down in Dorset sometime, and drop a few references and see what happens.
No, not Bournemouth, Devizes. Dorothy House Charity shop. in the Old Swanyard.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 12, 2011, 08:32:36 AM
Oh, that is admittedly a little more out of my way.  Still, I probably wont be down for a few months anyway.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on December 12, 2011, 04:10:01 PM
Very fucking cool, BB.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on December 12, 2011, 07:08:46 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 12, 2011, 04:10:01 PM
Very fucking cool, BB.
I thought so. I couldn't have been more surprised if Eris herself had jumped up and served me. (Which, I suppose in a way, she did)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 12, 2011, 08:20:35 PM
That's awesome!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on December 13, 2011, 03:01:50 PM
"Internet on the phone is so prohibiting sometimes." - Facebook post via mobile
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pæs on December 13, 2011, 03:30:22 PM
Quote from: Net on December 13, 2011, 03:01:50 PM
"Internet on the phone is so prohibiting sometimes." - Facebook post via mobile
:spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 16, 2011, 03:14:34 PM
Sister calls: HAPPY CROTCH DAY!

Me: ...thanks.

Sister: They don't make cards for crotches.

Me: Thank you for being so support of my crotch situation.

Sister: Good luck at the crotchatologist!

Me: I'm sure it will be crotchtastic.

Sister: Don't be so crotch-ity.

Me: ...I hate you.



Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 16, 2011, 05:15:07 PM
From a teacher friend of mine:

(Me, going over my student's fight club essay): Did you purposely put the word dildo in the middle of this sentence?
(Student) yeah. It reflects the fragmentation of his masculinity and it was my existential choice. And it's kinda fun to put dildos and dicks in my paper. (Me): did you prep that answer for me?
(Student): yup. Sounded pretty smart huh?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 16, 2011, 05:38:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on December 16, 2011, 05:15:07 PM
From a teacher friend of mine:

(Me, going over my student's fight club essay): Did you purposely put the word dildo in the middle of this sentence?
(Student) yeah. It reflects the fragmentation of his masculinity and it was my existential choice. And it's kinda fun to put dildos and dicks in my paper. (Me): did you prep that answer for me?
(Student): yup. Sounded pretty smart huh?

Give that asshole an A!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on December 16, 2011, 07:46:45 PM
Quote from: Suu on December 16, 2011, 03:14:34 PM
Sister calls: HAPPY CROTCH DAY!

Me: ...thanks.

Sister: They don't make cards for crotches.

They don't? I bet she didn't even look.

If my leg weren't in a cast, making wandering through the city center somewhat cumbersome, I'd check this awesome postcards shop we have here, they have so many weird cards there's got to be something (un)suitable.

Also, you can get back at her when she calls next time asking how it was, tell her you feel uterrific.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on December 16, 2011, 07:49:38 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on December 16, 2011, 07:46:45 PM
Quote from: Suu on December 16, 2011, 03:14:34 PM
Sister calls: HAPPY CROTCH DAY!

Me: ...thanks.

Sister: They don't make cards for crotches.

They don't? I bet she didn't even look.

If my leg weren't in a cast, making wandering through the city center somewhat cumbersome, I'd check this awesome postcards shop we have here, they have so many weird cards there's got to be something (un)suitable.

Also, you can get back at her when she calls next time asking how it was, tell her you feel uterrific.

:facepalm:

Trip.  Come here.  I need to smack you, now.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 16, 2011, 09:17:31 PM
"At least it will all be over in 3 weeks."
- Lieutenant Benard Montgomery/1914

Fact.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on December 16, 2011, 09:44:15 PM
BUT LUNA IM TRYING TO HELP!

(no?)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on December 17, 2011, 03:03:18 AM
Quote from: Triple Zero on December 16, 2011, 09:44:15 PM
BUT LUNA IM TRYING TO HELP!

(no?)

Help all you like.  I just occasionally like smacking pretty men.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 18, 2011, 04:28:45 PM
(16:19:40)<Cain>oh Tesco, I love how you assume we are all stupid
(16:19:54)<Cain>"no artificial colours, flavouring or preservatives"
(16:20:19)<Cain>this milk is pink, tastes of strawberries and can last for a month in my fridge
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on December 18, 2011, 11:24:16 PM
Seriously? I'm pretty sure if the pink was strawberry pink, it wouldn't be the color I assume Tesco strawberry milk it (meaning it looks like ours).


Shoe Ears: where are the pickles? I need to rule over the pickle sea. *retrieves fork from drawer*
Agent GARBO: ..."Pickle sea"?
Shoe Ears: Yes. Pickle sea. With my trident fork of death. Come here, my subjects!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 18, 2011, 11:47:11 PM
I know the distinction between natural and unnatural is somwhat arbitrary at the best of times, but when your flat out contradicting your packaging, that is something special.

Not that anyone will do anything.  Tesco is like the Godzilla of supermarket chains, and will crush anyone who tries to fuck with it, even on the smallest of issues.  Let's put it this way: Asda are owned by Wal-Mart over here., who pump significant money into them in hope of undermining the local competition.  Tesco are still beating the crap out of them in terms of sales and profits and owned politicians.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 18, 2011, 11:51:10 PM
I must take a moment to point out that strawberries will make milk distinctly strawberry-flavored and turn it bright pink, and that also for some mysterious reason ultra-pasteurization is not considered an "artificial preservative" and will make milk keep for a month. Which frankly creeps me out.

My dad used to grow strawberries on his farm which were a variety with an intense flavor, specifically for the jam and flavorings industry. Best strawberries ever, but you can't buy them in the supermarket because they're small, spoil easily and don't transport well.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on December 19, 2011, 12:17:28 AM
It's cheaper for Tesco to import irradiated Mexican Strawberries, at the height of our own strawberry growing season, than it is to get British Strawberries 20 miles from the field to the shelf.

Our poor Strawberry farmers then have to fill out the ever growing pile of EU Subsidy claim forms, where they get paid for not growing certain (randomly picked, by Neil Kinnock) crops, eg; If he grows Strawberries this year, he can claim an EU Subsidy for not growing. . . . . . . sustainable tropical hardwood, or Sargasso kelp. Then they moan on local radio about how they can hardly afford to buy a new combine harvester this year, to harvest all the crops they haven't grown!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 20, 2011, 05:58:00 PM
Yesterday's final:

"Essay Question #3: The "Syllabus Police" is bringing your history professor to a hearing questioning why she put "Frankenstein" on the course list. While preparing for her defense, she faints under pressure, now it's up to you, the student, to prepare and give a passable defense as to why the book should stay in the curriculum."

Me:

"To the assembled masses of the Syllabus Police and the students, Romans, and faculty herein. Allow me to give you my defense as to why "Frankenstein" should be read as part of the course curriculum for HIS310....

blah

blah

blah

...And that's why we should be allowed to read Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein" in this course.

Thank you."

*Applause!*



Yep. I even wrote the applause.

Give me my A, please.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 20, 2011, 06:00:52 PM
Quote from: Nigel on December 18, 2011, 11:51:10 PM
I must take a moment to point out that strawberries will make milk distinctly strawberry-flavored and turn it bright pink, and that also for some mysterious reason ultra-pasteurization is not considered an "artificial preservative" and will make milk keep for a month. Which frankly creeps me out.

My dad used to grow strawberries on his farm which were a variety with an intense flavor, specifically for the jam and flavorings industry. Best strawberries ever, but you can't buy them in the supermarket because they're small, spoil easily and don't transport well.

All true.  However, I checked on the side, and they use some kind of beetroot extract for the colouring, and there were more E numbers than the East Central postcode in the drink.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 20, 2011, 06:12:10 PM
Quote from: BadBeast on December 19, 2011, 12:17:28 AM
It's cheaper for Tesco to import irradiated Mexican Strawberries, at the height of our own strawberry growing season, than it is to get British Strawberries 20 miles from the field to the shelf.

Our poor Strawberry farmers then have to fill out the ever growing pile of EU Subsidy claim forms, where they get paid for not growing certain (randomly picked, by Neil Kinnock) crops, eg; If he grows Strawberries this year, he can claim an EU Subsidy for not growing. . . . . . . sustainable tropical hardwood, or Sargasso kelp. Then they moan on local radio about how they can hardly afford to buy a new combine harvester this year, to harvest all the crops they haven't grown!

That's kinda bullshit. I have to admit that in the US, at least in RI and FL, we're really big on eating our local crops first before importing goods.

Florida Strawberries are February, Rhode Island are June, and local strawberry season is THE BEST. I purposely try not to purchase groceries that aren't locally produced, unless I, you know, want strawberries in November. Then I know they're coming from California or something. But still..
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on December 20, 2011, 08:00:31 PM
Nope. Our strawberry season runs from April or so until June. Them's Mexican strawberries, I believe. I would much, much sooner wait for strawberries locally grown than eat Mexican strawberries (Mexico uses pesticides even we won't use here in the US, and believe you me, that's saying something, because our standards are so very low. Also, locally grown berries are far superior in taste, but we also buy them fresh off the plants from local farmers).
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 20, 2011, 08:01:34 PM
I wouldn't eat strawberries locally grown in London for reasons I'm sure I don't have to explain.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on December 20, 2011, 08:03:37 PM
Yeah, no explanation needed. I live in a ruralish area and the place we like best is two or three miles up the street from us.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on December 20, 2011, 08:57:25 PM
Quote from: Suu on December 20, 2011, 05:58:00 PM
Yesterday's final:

"Essay Question #3: The "Syllabus Police" is bringing your history professor to a hearing questioning why she put "Frankenstein" on the course list. While preparing for her defense, she faints under pressure, now it's up to you, the student, to prepare and give a passable defense as to why the book should stay in the curriculum."

Me:

"To the assembled masses of the Syllabus Police and the students, Romans, and faculty herein. Allow me to give you my defense as to why "Frankenstein" should be read as part of the course curriculum for HIS310....

blah

blah

blah

...And that's why we should be allowed to read Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein" in this course.

Thank you."

*Applause!*



Yep. I even wrote the applause.

Give me my A, please.
We have created a Monster!  :mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on December 20, 2011, 09:13:10 PM
I really miss the wild strawberries we got in our back yard when I was a kid.  They were tiny, but soo sweet...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 20, 2011, 09:16:35 PM
<MomLalonde>My parrot is angrily walking around her cage screaming "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!" "GET OUT OF HERE!!"
<MomLalonde>Or was
<MomLalonde>Now she is happily saying "Kisses?"
<MomLalonde>And now she is violently assaulting toys while screeching in between saying "Come here, Toby. Come here."
<KingSphinx>Maybe you should get a priest?
<Kaliayev>parrots are always like that
<Kaliayev>if a demon possessed a parrot, it's behaviour would likely improve
<Kaliayev>parrots are the reason pirate captains usually only have one leg, a hook for a hand and a missing eye
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 21, 2011, 02:45:01 AM
Quote from: Cain on December 20, 2011, 06:00:52 PM
Quote from: Nigel on December 18, 2011, 11:51:10 PM
I must take a moment to point out that strawberries will make milk distinctly strawberry-flavored and turn it bright pink, and that also for some mysterious reason ultra-pasteurization is not considered an "artificial preservative" and will make milk keep for a month. Which frankly creeps me out.

My dad used to grow strawberries on his farm which were a variety with an intense flavor, specifically for the jam and flavorings industry. Best strawberries ever, but you can't buy them in the supermarket because they're small, spoil easily and don't transport well.

All true.  However, I checked on the side, and they use some kind of beetroot extract for the colouring, and there were more E numbers than the East Central postcode in the drink.

yeah, they usually use beetroot for pink coloring here too. What's an E number?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nast on December 21, 2011, 02:54:24 AM
Supermarket strawberries are usually ginormous woody things with anemic hearts and an insipid taste.  :sad:

I agree, woodland strawberries are amazing! I once had a pot of teeny tiny alpine strawberries growing, and they were the most divine things ever! Crimson red, meltingly soft, with a concentrated berry flavor. I want to have a whole patch of them some day.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nast on December 21, 2011, 02:58:01 AM
And the best thing about growing strawberries is that even though the parent plant will reduce its yield over the years, it propagates by new plants attached to runners so that you can have an ever-growing supply.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on December 21, 2011, 03:22:58 AM
The last Wild Strawberry I found, was halfway up a Welsh Mountain, at about 3.30 am November 6th, 2004. We were walking up the back way to see the World Touring Class Rally stage, and came straight from an awesome Firework night party. The lane we were walking up had steep banks either side, and I saw what must have been the latest strawberry ever, only the size of my fingernail, so I picked it and ate it. Words cannot describe the magnitude of the sweet strawberry flavour that almost exploded my head off. It spoiled me for all other strawberries. Some guy in a Subaru Imprezu (Or was it a Mitsubishi?) won the Rally stage, but it will be the strawberry I shall always remember about that night.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 21, 2011, 03:54:17 AM
When I was a kid on Lopez Island, wild strawberries were everywhere. It was kind of a magical place to be a kid, really.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 21, 2011, 10:14:01 AM
Quote from: Nigel on December 21, 2011, 02:45:01 AM
Quote from: Cain on December 20, 2011, 06:00:52 PM
Quote from: Nigel on December 18, 2011, 11:51:10 PM
I must take a moment to point out that strawberries will make milk distinctly strawberry-flavored and turn it bright pink, and that also for some mysterious reason ultra-pasteurization is not considered an "artificial preservative" and will make milk keep for a month. Which frankly creeps me out.

My dad used to grow strawberries on his farm which were a variety with an intense flavor, specifically for the jam and flavorings industry. Best strawberries ever, but you can't buy them in the supermarket because they're small, spoil easily and don't transport well.

All true.  However, I checked on the side, and they use some kind of beetroot extract for the colouring, and there were more E numbers than the East Central postcode in the drink.

yeah, they usually use beetroot for pink coloring here too. What's an E number?

Artificial additives.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 21, 2011, 05:45:08 PM
Quote from: Cain on December 21, 2011, 10:14:01 AM
Quote from: Nigel on December 21, 2011, 02:45:01 AM
Quote from: Cain on December 20, 2011, 06:00:52 PM
Quote from: Nigel on December 18, 2011, 11:51:10 PM
I must take a moment to point out that strawberries will make milk distinctly strawberry-flavored and turn it bright pink, and that also for some mysterious reason ultra-pasteurization is not considered an "artificial preservative" and will make milk keep for a month. Which frankly creeps me out.

My dad used to grow strawberries on his farm which were a variety with an intense flavor, specifically for the jam and flavorings industry. Best strawberries ever, but you can't buy them in the supermarket because they're small, spoil easily and don't transport well.

All true.  However, I checked on the side, and they use some kind of beetroot extract for the colouring, and there were more E numbers than the East Central postcode in the drink.

yeah, they usually use beetroot for pink coloring here too. What's an E number?

Artificial additives.

:lulz: Are any of them technically flavoring, coloring, or preservatives? I bet they're technically not. Weaselly bastards! :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on December 22, 2011, 12:47:26 AM
Quote from: Nigel on December 21, 2011, 05:45:08 PM
Quote from: Cain on December 21, 2011, 10:14:01 AM
Quote from: Nigel on December 21, 2011, 02:45:01 AM
Quote from: Cain on December 20, 2011, 06:00:52 PM
Quote from: Nigel on December 18, 2011, 11:51:10 PM
I must take a moment to point out that strawberries will make milk distinctly strawberry-flavored and turn it bright pink, and that also for some mysterious reason ultra-pasteurization is not considered an "artificial preservative" and will make milk keep for a month. Which frankly creeps me out.

My dad used to grow strawberries on his farm which were a variety with an intense flavor, specifically for the jam and flavorings industry. Best strawberries ever, but you can't buy them in the supermarket because they're small, spoil easily and don't transport well.

All true.  However, I checked on the side, and they use some kind of beetroot extract for the colouring, and there were more E numbers than the East Central postcode in the drink.

yeah, they usually use beetroot for pink coloring here too. What's an E number?

Artificial additives.

:lulz: Are any of them technically flavoring, coloring, or preservatives? I bet they're technically not. Weaselly bastards! :lulz:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E_number
QuoteE numbers are codes for food additives that have been assessed for use within the European Union (the "E" prefix stands for "Europe").[1] They are commonly found on food labels throughout the European Union.[2] Safety assessment and approval are the responsibility of the European Food Safety Authority.[3]
QuoteBecause vitamin C has an E number (actually several E numbers, 300-305, for different chemical forms of the vitamin), it is impossible to live on a diet without any substances that have E numbers. "Free of E numbers" then simply means that pure forms of the substances are not intentionally added, even though identical substances certainly exist naturally in many foods.
QuoteE162    Beetroot Red, Betanin    Red    Approved in the EU.[7] Approved in the US.[8]
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on December 22, 2011, 10:26:08 PM
E621 is MSG, for instance.

The 100s are colourings and the 200s are preservatives, IIRC.

It's partly so they won't have to print scary-sounding chemicals (though a lot of E numbers are perfectly harmless) and partly because I suppose it saves space on the label or something.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 22, 2011, 10:51:23 PM
Sister: You're coming with me to Applebee's tonight.

Me: Um, why?

Sister: Because it's 2 for 1 drinks and 1/2 price apps after 10! My friends and I always go on Thursdays.

Me: We'll see, I gotta save my cash, you know.

Sister: Oh, I didn't say you were drinking, I need you to drive home, because I usually have 4 or 5.

Me: WTF?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 24, 2011, 05:53:18 AM
I PeeDee troll'd a bar tonight.

Bartender Mike: Heads up, I put a significant amount of tequila in those.

Me: No worries, I'm a goddamn industry professional.

Mike: Meaning?

Sister: It means she's a drunk who forgot to warn you that tequila has no effect on her.

Me: I win bets!

Sister: You should see what she does with a whole bottle.

Mike: ...Dare I ask?

Me: I stick it up my ass and whistle, "Yankee Doodle".

Mike: OMFG, marry me!

Sister: WHAT?!

Me: It's from a personal ad a Holy ManTM wrote for me.

Mike: We have a Holy blessing. Marriage! NOW!

Sister: DAMN YOU. YOU'RE ALWAYS ONE STEP AHEAD.

Me: No, I'm simply blessedTM.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Slurrealist on December 27, 2011, 11:19:24 PM
If you will change the rules of what controls you, you will change the rules of what you can't control.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 27, 2011, 11:58:57 PM
Coworker: kev how do you think this persons name is pronounced? Some swedish couple named their kid that.

Me: :looks at article and the random string of letters and numbers: i think its pronounced "my parents are retarded assholes"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 28, 2011, 02:23:55 AM
Dad: Look Suu, "The 7 Signs of the Apocalypse" is on.

Me: Dad, I don't watch that shit. It poisons peoples brains and breeds conspiracy theorists.

Dad: True...at least it creates entertaining lunatics.

Me: No, the really entertaining lunatics are the ones that need to get sucked up with the Rapture, then I can have my goddamn planet to myself.

Dad: Bullshit, Blondie sang that song long before those idiots came up with that!

Me: Why do you only think about music?

Dad: There's a song for everything, I've been telling you this since you were a little kid.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on December 29, 2011, 12:44:50 AM
Friend of mine:

My greatest fear is sitting in front of thousands of people while my Google search history is being read aloud.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 29, 2011, 12:52:01 AM
Rick Perry in Iowa:

"Every barrel of oil that comes out of those sands in Canada is a barrel of oil that we don't have to buy from a foreign source."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on December 29, 2011, 12:59:48 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 29, 2011, 12:52:01 AM
Rick Perry in Iowa:

"Every barrel of oil that comes out of those sands in Canada is a barrel of oil that we don't have to buy from a foreign source."

My brain rear ended the one in front of it by rubbernecking at the train wreck of this sentence.  :*(
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on December 29, 2011, 01:19:10 AM
I think I'm "writing in" a puddle of gametes on my card for 2012.  In good conscience I must vote for the most compete set of chromosomes I can.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on December 29, 2011, 01:22:10 AM
Roger:  It's not my problem, I don't have to look at myself.
Me:  Well, the rest of the world does, and if you want us to stop puking in your cheerios then you better shape the fuck up!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 29, 2011, 03:18:02 AM
Me: im thinking of getting a vanity plate.
Villager: yeah? What are you going to get?
Me: i dunno yet. But it will be fun and might make it easier to find if it gets stolen.
Villager: how about "STOLEN"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 29, 2011, 01:31:01 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 29, 2011, 12:52:01 AM
Rick Perry in Iowa:

"Every barrel of oil that comes out of those sands in Canada is a barrel of oil that we don't have to buy from a foreign source."

Oh, my, god.

Did he say this in Iowa?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 29, 2011, 01:42:51 PM
While Rick Perry's own statement is laughably stupid, the thinking behind it is even stupider.  Who else are they gonna sell oil to?  If the US stops buying, world prices will drop massively, and China ain't gonna pick up that slack.  Shit, California uses more oil than China right now.

Sure, US strategic reserves are pathetic, but last time I looked, most oil-rich countries tend to have poor, angry populations kept in line through buying off key constituencies and lots and lots of mercenaries.  Good luck paying them when your major commodity is dropping in price and isn't being bought as much.

I'm massively in favour of this outcome, naturally, as nothing gives me quite that warm feeling as the idea of a bloated oil sheikh having his own mercs pull a Praetorian Guard on him (one of the many reasons I love it when the Russians dick around with oil production levels, since they do it entirely to piss off OPEC), but srsly, oil is oil and the US gobbles up so much of that shit anyone trying to do a blockade is going to end up hurting themselves more. 
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on December 29, 2011, 03:37:04 PM
Mrs LMNO:  Hey, that's my opinion, and I'm just putting it out there.
Me: Um... Your opinion's looking kind of infected.
Mrs LMNO:  ...
Me: Do you mind putting it away?  It's just not right, waving your opinion around in public like that.  I mean, really, there are children watching.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 29, 2011, 03:41:28 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on December 29, 2011, 03:37:04 PM
Mrs LMNO:  Hey, that's my opinion, and I'm just putting it out there.
Me: Um... Your opinion's looking kind of infected.
Mrs LMNO:  ...
Me: Do you mind putting it away?  It's just not right, waving your opinion around in public like that.  I mean, really, there are children watching.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Slurrealist on December 29, 2011, 03:42:43 PM
 :mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on December 29, 2011, 03:56:21 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on December 29, 2011, 03:37:04 PM
Mrs LMNO:  Hey, that's my opinion, and I'm just putting it out there.
Me: Um... Your opinion's looking kind of infected.
Mrs LMNO:  ...
Me: Do you mind putting it away?  It's just not right, waving your opinion around in public like that.  I mean, really, there are children watching.

And she let's you live.   :lol:    She's gotta be one hell of a lady.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on January 03, 2012, 02:26:42 AM
Garbo: Crappy pop stars and MMA (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mixed_martial_arts) people, that's what Fresno gives the world.
Friend: That's not so bad.
Garbo: We gave the world Cher.
Friend: Ok, yeah, Fresno needs to be nuked off the map.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on January 03, 2012, 02:39:58 AM
::looking a the plaster cast of a Pompeii body with shackles around the ankles::

Richter: SOMEONE forgot the safe word.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on January 03, 2012, 02:49:03 AM
Quote from: Richter on January 03, 2012, 02:39:58 AM
::looking a the plaster cast of a Pompeii body with shackles around the ankles::

Richter: SOMEONE forgot the safe word.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on January 03, 2012, 02:49:52 AM
Villager: I didn't get you anything for our anniversary.
Me: Oh, fuck that shit, it's too soon after Christmas.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 06:31:39 PM
Mike the Engineer:  "That Occupy Wall Street business is good for one thing.  We can round them all up, once we get a president that isn't afraid to deal with communists."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 03, 2012, 10:15:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 06:31:39 PM
Mike the Engineer:  "That Occupy Wall Street business is good for one thing.  We can round them all up, once we get a president that isn't afraid to deal with communists."

Wow.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 10:51:05 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 03, 2012, 10:15:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 06:31:39 PM
Mike the Engineer:  "That Occupy Wall Street business is good for one thing.  We can round them all up, once we get a president that isn't afraid to deal with communists."

Wow.

This man firmly believes that the Free Marketâ„¢ would fix everything if those damn policiticans would just leave the banks alone.

I shit you not.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 03, 2012, 10:52:40 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 10:51:05 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 03, 2012, 10:15:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 06:31:39 PM
Mike the Engineer:  "That Occupy Wall Street business is good for one thing.  We can round them all up, once we get a president that isn't afraid to deal with communists."

Wow.

This man firmly believes that the Free Marketâ„¢ would fix everything if those damn policiticans would just leave the banks alone.

I shit you not.

It is for people like him that I sometimes wish a true libertarian society would come to be, so I could kill and eat him.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 10:54:53 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 03, 2012, 10:52:40 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 10:51:05 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 03, 2012, 10:15:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 06:31:39 PM
Mike the Engineer:  "That Occupy Wall Street business is good for one thing.  We can round them all up, once we get a president that isn't afraid to deal with communists."

Wow.

This man firmly believes that the Free Marketâ„¢ would fix everything if those damn policiticans would just leave the banks alone.

I shit you not.

It is for people like him that I sometimes wish a true libertarian society would come to be, so I could kill and eat him.

Um, your triglyceride count would skyrocket.  Seriously.  He's like a million calories and they're all fat.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on January 03, 2012, 11:46:44 PM
Bacon wrap for the crunchy granola types. There, he has a use now.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on January 04, 2012, 01:27:30 AM
:lulz: Wow. Mike there sounds like a charmer.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on January 04, 2012, 01:32:16 AM
REPUBLIC OF MINERVA!

LIBERTARIAN PARADISE!

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 04, 2012, 01:41:03 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on January 04, 2012, 01:27:30 AM
:lulz: Wow. Mike there sounds like a charmer.

Yeah, aside from his sparkling conversation, he brays laughter at his own jokes for 30 seconds at a time.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 04, 2012, 08:40:02 AM
Here's a President who knew how to deal with Communists

(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/cb/Nixon_Mao_1972-02-29.png/300px-Nixon_Mao_1972-02-29.png)

Also

(http://andymatic.com/images/bush_and_chinese_prime_minister.jpg)

And

(http://content.hollywire.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/obama-china.jpg)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on January 04, 2012, 09:00:35 AM
Do Chinese still count as Communists?  :?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 05, 2012, 03:10:28 PM
Yes.  Yes they do.  Well, Mao certainly did, at least.

Anyway, from a teacher friend of mine in Los Angeles:

QuoteA student's mother called this morning, to warn me her son was very jet-lagged. Sure enough, an hour into the day, the student approached my desk and asked to go home to nap because his "brain was not working properly" from the jet lag. I sent him home. As he packed up, I asked, "Where did you go again for the break?" Student: "Aspen." Ummm....
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 05, 2012, 07:46:16 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 10:54:53 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 03, 2012, 10:52:40 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 10:51:05 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 03, 2012, 10:15:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 03, 2012, 06:31:39 PM
Mike the Engineer:  "That Occupy Wall Street business is good for one thing.  We can round them all up, once we get a president that isn't afraid to deal with communists."

Wow.

This man firmly believes that the Free Marketâ„¢ would fix everything if those damn policiticans would just leave the banks alone.

I shit you not.

It is for people like him that I sometimes wish a true libertarian society would come to be, so I could kill and eat him.

Um, your triglyceride count would skyrocket.  Seriously.  He's like a million calories and they're all fat.

I bet he'd be delicious slow-roasted with a bourbon glaze and beer gravy. And I could skim the fat and use it for frying.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 05, 2012, 07:46:38 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 05, 2012, 03:10:28 PM
Yes.  Yes they do.  Well, Mao certainly did, at least.

Anyway, from a teacher friend of mine in Los Angeles:

QuoteA student's mother called this morning, to warn me her son was very jet-lagged. Sure enough, an hour into the day, the student approached my desk and asked to go home to nap because his "brain was not working properly" from the jet lag. I sent him home. As he packed up, I asked, "Where did you go again for the break?" Student: "Aspen." Ummm....

:lulz: Jet-lag... how does it work?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on January 05, 2012, 07:48:44 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 05, 2012, 07:46:38 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 05, 2012, 03:10:28 PM
Yes.  Yes they do.  Well, Mao certainly did, at least.

Anyway, from a teacher friend of mine in Los Angeles:

QuoteA student's mother called this morning, to warn me her son was very jet-lagged. Sure enough, an hour into the day, the student approached my desk and asked to go home to nap because his "brain was not working properly" from the jet lag. I sent him home. As he packed up, I asked, "Where did you go again for the break?" Student: "Aspen." Ummm....

:lulz: Jet-lag... how does it work?
Obvious, they took the long way around.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on January 06, 2012, 02:45:59 AM
EoC:  My blood work came back.  I think I have Hepatitis.

EoCGF:  If you have Hepatitis, does that mean we're having condom sex for a while?

EoC:  Nope.  It means you're getting Hepatitis.



Edit for spelling.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 06, 2012, 02:48:26 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on January 06, 2012, 02:45:59 AM
EoC:  My blood work came back.  I think I have Hepatitis.

EoCGF:  If you have Hepatitis, does that mean we're having condom sex for a while?

EoC:  Nope.  It means you're getting Heptatitis.

:lulz:

(http://www.fizzygrizzly.com/forums/images/smilies/ff5.gif)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on January 06, 2012, 03:01:27 AM
I took a turn for the disgustingly ill last week.  When they did my blood work yesterday, I got a call from the emergency on-call doctor who said something along the lines of:

"YOUR LIVER ENZYMES ARE CRITICAL!  Your AST should be below 200.  It's at 427.  Your ALT should also be below 200.  It's at 904.  Are you feeling okay?"

"Uh.  Well yeah I felt awful last week but I'm at work now.  Bit of a sore throat."

"Okay.  These are levels we see when someone's overdosed on acetametaphine or, well your blood work from six months ago indicates you aren't a long term alcoholic, or maye you picked up Hepatitis at some bad restaurant?  Just uh, make sure you call your primary care in the morning."

The guy seemed legitimately astounded I was standing.  In fact, I felt better than I had in a week and a half.  Today they confirmed it's mono, so no I don't have Hep, but the above bit was from last night before either of us knew that.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on January 06, 2012, 04:56:46 AM
 :eek:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on January 06, 2012, 06:55:22 AM
"If you have a pizza with radius z and thickness a, it's volume is pizza (or pi*z*z*a)"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on January 08, 2012, 08:24:37 PM
SOme gems from last night, which I can remember since I was the designated driver.

At the bar:
Angela: Mike, that girl you're interested in says stop being a pussy and go and talk to her.
Mike: Ok.
Mike: Hi. My name is Mike.
Girl: My name is [something. I don't know]
Mike: Cool. :walks away quickly:

Me: Dude, you ever have an Irish car bomb? Oh, wait, that's right, you don't like beer.
Pickles: Hmmm... I'll do one.
Me: Tonight?
Pickles: Fuck it.

(I get Pickles a car bomb, explain how it works. He gets half way though it, puts it down)

Everyone: No!!!! Keep going!!!!
Mike: :grabs glass, downs it:
Everyone: Go Mike!

Pickles: So, I think just as of a minute ago, Angela and I are dating.
Me: I'll remind you both in the morning.

Driving home (in Pickles' car):
Pickles: Can I piss out the window?
Me: No.

Mike (for the fifth time): Kev, you're awesome man, and I really mean that. I'm not just saying that cuz I'm drunk.
Me: Thanks man.

Pickles: I grabbed someone's junk at the bar. Who was it?
Me: Me.
Pickles: Sorry man.

Pulling into the drive way
Pickles: :eyeing his aunt's statue of the Mutheragawd: Can I piss on Mary?
Me: :suddenly Catholic again for a split second: NO!!!

Villager: You just missed it. Mike got down on all fours and Matt got on top of him and rode him around like a horse, and grabbed his nuts to make him go.
Me: ......
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 09, 2012, 02:10:45 AM
Alty on the phone:  "Give me my stuff, cheap.  I don't want to hear about how many brown people in 3rd world countries had to suffer, I just want my shit."

(Obviously being sarcastic)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on January 09, 2012, 02:16:38 AM
:lol: Nice.


Same parental unit who claims Union POW camps were worse than Nazi death camps: "The Republican party has moved so far left in your lifetime. It's not true to the roots of the GOP anymore and that's why I'm not a Republican."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 09, 2012, 02:20:36 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on January 09, 2012, 02:16:38 AM
:lol: Nice.


Same parental unit who claims Union POW camps were worse than Nazi death camps: "The Republican party has moved so far left in your lifetime. It's not true to the roots of the GOP anymore and that's why I'm not a Republican."

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on January 09, 2012, 02:26:32 AM
That made my brain hurt.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on January 09, 2012, 02:31:18 AM
:lulz: You should hear him go on about RINOs and St. Ronnie. I have to work really, really hard not to laugh at him.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 09, 2012, 02:34:13 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on January 09, 2012, 02:31:18 AM
:lulz: You should hear him go on about RINOs and St. Ronnie. I have to work really, really hard not to laugh at him.

Tell him that Obama's going to replace Eric Holder with Oprah Winfrey.   :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 09, 2012, 04:51:42 AM
I love how batshit conservatives hold up Saint Ronnie the Cut-and-Run Taxraiser as their idol.

It almost makes me think that they're performing some kind of satirical exercise.  Almost.  Especially when you remember how much today's Neocons hated him back in the day.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on January 09, 2012, 04:57:44 AM
...I am going to ask him about that. And will let him ramble instead of trying to debate with him.


I should also ask him if he still believes in the Bilderberg conspiracy.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 09, 2012, 05:38:49 AM
About which bit?  If you want references, the taxes were raised in a somewhat underhand way (the 1983 Social Security amendments) and used to plug the holes in the budget caused by the other tax cuts he made.  The cut-and-run bit was, of course, about Lebanon.  And the Neocons were warning Reagan and Bush I that the Communists were being tricksy little hobbits right up until the fall of the Berlin Wall.  It was all a sham, a feint, according to them, and Reagan was facilitating it by negotiating with Gorbachev.

Also for fun, point out how Reagan felt about WMD.  "A world free of nuclear weapons."  Even in private, he told close advisors and political allies he felt the risk of nukes outweighed the benefits, and only bilateral disarmament could make the world a safer place.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on January 09, 2012, 06:34:50 AM
I had intended to broach it and let him ramble, actually, because he'll say some stupendously retarded shit if you don't interrupt him, but those references would be useful for keeping him on topic.

He might actually agree with Ronnie on the WMDs. I vaguely recall him saying something to the same effect.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 09, 2012, 03:18:02 PM
I have to disagree with Ronnie on that one.

Humans are savage animals that can't or won't control themselves without coercion, at least on the national level.

Before nukes:  Global, no-holds-barred wars.

After Nukes:  Regional, limited wars.

TGRR,
Knows the difference between "bad" and "worse".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 09, 2012, 03:30:54 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on January 09, 2012, 06:34:50 AM
I had intended to broach it and let him ramble, actually, because he'll say some stupendously retarded shit if you don't interrupt him, but those references would be useful for keeping him on topic.

He might actually agree with Ronnie on the WMDs. I vaguely recall him saying something to the same effect.

Ask him about Reagan pulling the Marines out of Beirut after Hezbollah blew up the Marines' barracks.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 09, 2012, 03:39:56 PM
On the other hand, large territorial wars never threatened the entire extinction of humanity. 

I'd be more inclined to risk nukes, if not for all the mechanical and human failures that keep bringing the world to the brink of absolute destruction every five years or so.  As it is, steadily reducing stockpiles to minimum deterrence levels is likely the best way to go.  There is also a large body of documentary evidence to suggest that it was large scale conventional war that both the Soviets and the Americans feared during the Cold War, and not global thermonuclear war (Richard Ned Lebow, We All Lost the Cold War, 1992)

Strangely, Henry Kissinger has of late being echoing Reagan's position.  He seems to feel the inherent risks of nuclear weapons outweigh their benefits in the existing world order, and that securing a credible international norm against proliferation is preferable to the existing status quo.  In an ironic twist, this seems to be influencing the Iranian strategic position, the Iranians are clearly seeking a nuclear capability, but not necessarily nuclear weapons, unless threatened.  Pretty much all nuclear states currently existing would be able to respond to a nuclear threat in kind fairly swiftly, even if they were to disarm right now.  The expertise wouldn't go away, and neither would the infrastructure, but the latent threat of peacetime accidents and human failure would pose far less of a risk.

So I'm kinda meh about the whole thing, except when it comes to reducing stockpiles.  We don't need enough weapons to destroy the planets 30 times over (I'm talking to you, Putin).  Three times over is more than sufficient.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 09, 2012, 03:58:24 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 09, 2012, 03:39:56 PM
On the other hand, large territorial wars never threatened the entire extinction of humanity. 

Yes, that is an added benefit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on January 09, 2012, 04:44:25 PM
In the car headed to the store:

Radio DJ: And in recent news, it appears Rod Stewart is coming out with a new album this year! Here's "Forever Young"!

Me: WAT.

Roommate: FUCK! Let's get out of the car before the song starts!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Rod Stewart on January 09, 2012, 04:49:26 PM
Quote from: Suu on January 09, 2012, 04:44:25 PM
In the car headed to the store:

Radio DJ: And in recent news, it appears Rod Stewart is coming out with a new album this year! Here's "Forever Young"!

Me: WAT.

Roommate: FUCK! Let's get out of the car before the song starts!
:crankey:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: navkat on January 10, 2012, 01:51:14 AM
Quote from: Alty on August 05, 2011, 03:25:56 AM
For posterity!
Wyldkat sez:
QuoteI know exactly what passive aggressiveness is.  I live with someone who can be very passive aggressive.  I do have some tendencies, but for the most part I catch them and I recognize them because of living with that person.  What you people are calling passive aggressive are for the most part misunderstandings (intentional or not, whichever it is) of what I'm saying.

You people are a bunch of cunts...CUNTS, I say!

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: navkat on January 10, 2012, 02:04:27 AM
Quote from: Nigel on August 05, 2011, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: Alty on August 05, 2011, 03:25:56 AM
For posterity!
Wyldkat sez:
QuoteI know exactly what passive aggressiveness is.  I live with someone who can be very passive aggressive.  I do have some tendencies, but for the most part I catch them and I recognize them because of living with that person.  What you people are calling passive aggressive are for the most part misunderstandings (intentional or not, whichever it is) of what I'm saying.



That was SO CLASSIC! :lulz: Meta passive-aggression.

Oh jesus, this is so eerily similar to that inane argument you and I had that day that I thought it was quoted from it somewhere. You mean there was aNOTHER argument about passive aggression?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 10, 2012, 03:31:45 AM
Quote from: navkat on January 10, 2012, 02:04:27 AM
Quote from: Nigel on August 05, 2011, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: Alty on August 05, 2011, 03:25:56 AM
For posterity!
Wyldkat sez:
QuoteI know exactly what passive aggressiveness is.  I live with someone who can be very passive aggressive.  I do have some tendencies, but for the most part I catch them and I recognize them because of living with that person.  What you people are calling passive aggressive are for the most part misunderstandings (intentional or not, whichever it is) of what I'm saying.



That was SO CLASSIC! :lulz: Meta passive-aggression.

Oh jesus, this is so eerily similar to that inane argument you and I had that day that I thought it was quoted from it somewhere. You mean there was aNOTHER argument about passive aggression?

On whatever that lame little pagan board was called... the one Babs and Wyldkat started. Wyldkat is the GRAND MASTER of passive-aggression.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on January 10, 2012, 04:30:40 AM
Quote from: Nigel on January 10, 2012, 03:31:45 AM
Quote from: navkat on January 10, 2012, 02:04:27 AM
Quote from: Nigel on August 05, 2011, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: Alty on August 05, 2011, 03:25:56 AM
For posterity!
Wyldkat sez:
QuoteI know exactly what passive aggressiveness is.  I live with someone who can be very passive aggressive.  I do have some tendencies, but for the most part I catch them and I recognize them because of living with that person.  What you people are calling passive aggressive are for the most part misunderstandings (intentional or not, whichever it is) of what I'm saying.



That was SO CLASSIC! :lulz: Meta passive-aggression.

Oh jesus, this is so eerily similar to that inane argument you and I had that day that I thought it was quoted from it somewhere. You mean there was aNOTHER argument about passive aggression?

On whatever that lame little pagan board was called... the one Babs and Wyldkat started. Wyldkat is the GRAND MASTER of passive-aggression.
Yes, she took it to a Sub/Dom level that was too lulzy to consider as erotic. For most people, that is. Wasn't Babs her payoff for that?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 10, 2012, 05:48:35 AM
Quote from: BadBeast on January 10, 2012, 04:30:40 AM
Quote from: Nigel on January 10, 2012, 03:31:45 AM
Quote from: navkat on January 10, 2012, 02:04:27 AM
Quote from: Nigel on August 05, 2011, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: Alty on August 05, 2011, 03:25:56 AM
For posterity!
Wyldkat sez:
QuoteI know exactly what passive aggressiveness is.  I live with someone who can be very passive aggressive.  I do have some tendencies, but for the most part I catch them and I recognize them because of living with that person.  What you people are calling passive aggressive are for the most part misunderstandings (intentional or not, whichever it is) of what I'm saying.



That was SO CLASSIC! :lulz: Meta passive-aggression.

Oh jesus, this is so eerily similar to that inane argument you and I had that day that I thought it was quoted from it somewhere. You mean there was aNOTHER argument about passive aggression?

On whatever that lame little pagan board was called... the one Babs and Wyldkat started. Wyldkat is the GRAND MASTER of passive-aggression.
Yes, she took it to a Sub/Dom level that was too lulzy to consider as erotic. For most people, that is. Wasn't Babs her payoff for that?

ICK.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 10, 2012, 11:27:14 PM
Enabler:  I like 'em big & dumb.

Me:  Outstanding!  I've been a dumbass all my life!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on January 10, 2012, 11:37:01 PM
Mike: Being busy makes the day go by faster, right?

Richter: ...but like a mexican food shit, you regret every torrential second of it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 15, 2012, 06:41:46 AM
EFO said just now: "Dude, everybody knows about MLK day. It's not like, like Christmas or something, that only some people celebrate because they're Christian. It isn't a religious holiday, it's an American holiday."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on January 19, 2012, 02:33:11 AM
Doing some research on a former president of my university and found this little nugget of GOLD:

Quote
Quote
[...]
A history lesson if you please,

google Karl Leonard Falk

(the #1 listing)

This is what happens with censure, this is what happens when you shout to drown out the truth you do not believe.

[...]


Interesting piece on Falk. It sounds like Falk was the worst kind of liberal - the totalitarian variety. How appropriate that the fall of the Berlin Wall was his undoing.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: I love Conservatives. Falk was a fucking Nazi. The article the second poster mentions is pretty clear about exactly what that entailed.
Also, he died before the fall of the Berlin wall. But, y'know, don't let that stop you.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on January 20, 2012, 02:47:52 PM
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ly335ow8k91qe0zaho1_500.jpg)

"The teaching, the blessing, the knowledge, the prayer, the mantra you are seeking is 'bullshit.'  Say it 9 million times a second for just a couple of minutes, or a couple of weeks, or a couple of years and soon or later you will breakthrough.  You will get it.  This is no extraordinary feat.  It requires no special training or practice. You could do it right now.  Dare ya, dare ya, daaaare yaaaaa."— Anti-teachings (http://anti-teachings.tumblr.com/)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Slurrealist on January 21, 2012, 09:16:26 PM
"You shouldn't. Fear is the chain of slavery," He said. "Once you feel fear, you're in the system. Why do you feel fear? Because of the rules imposed on you by the society? Or because you're afraid of looking bad in front of others? Or because of shame of doing something that everyone had told you is wrong? It's your life. It's your rules, or the absence of it. There's nothing to lose, and nothing to get. You know why so many people look depressed around here? Because they had opportunities, however fear stopped them from following their chances to get a better life, and now they got nothing more to do than say shit about the ones who know how to overcome fear and know how to live. If you want to do something, or show your feelings to someone, don't be afraid, and do it. Even if the result will be negative, you will have an answer at least, instead of the eternal 'maybe yes, maybe not' of fear running through your mind twenty four seven."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on January 23, 2012, 05:31:59 PM
St. Dingbat: Look what I made! *sends pic of whipped cream and strawberries*

Me: Whipped cream?

St. Dingbat: YES!

Me: Did it have to use the safe word?

St. Dingbat: Huh?

Me: Google it.

*five minutes pass*

St. Dingbat: You're a sick fuck.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 23, 2012, 06:15:53 PM
QuotePERSONALLY i believe that onlya DRAGON should answer questions about dragons. Mr.E should stick to the Fae, as that is what he is, and I shall not believe what he says. I have myself spoken with an elusive clan, and although we are no longer in contact they would agree with me in this.

http://www.realfairies.net/forum/mr-e/mr-e-answers-more-dragon-questions

lolz
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 06:47:33 PM
*Roger reaches for Cell Phone to turn it on to check in*

Enabler:  "I'll break every bone in your hand."

Roger:  :shudder:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:10:45 PM
Quote from: Whatever on January 23, 2012, 07:07:27 PM
I can piss people off everywhere......   :lulz: 

From TCC http://wicca.com/forums/index.php?topic=7578.0 (http://wicca.com/forums/index.php?topic=7578.0)

Quote from: Khara
I'm sorry, are you saying women are scared because of their hormones?

Quote from: blue
This one is easy. Take a transgender male who is seeking gender reassignment. The first thing they do is begin hormone therapy ... right ?

Same with female to male. Add testosterone and she will experience a different way of looking at the world. It's likely to make her more bold and assertive.

Fight or flight .... timid or bold .... what your attractions are ....personality traits .... whatever .... it's all a product of that unique biochemical reaction that's going on inside your body and brain.

Quote from: Khara
I am going to have to admit something here that I rarely admit. 

This has left me just fvcking speechless......

I can't get mad because it is based on ignorance and prejudice.  Yet I am mad because it is based on ignorance and prejudice.

Quote from: blue
Don't get mad Khara. It's just my view of things that's all. Years ago i think i would have been more in agreement with the groupthink. Now i'm beginning to undrstand why, historically,women have always been relegated to the role of second class citizens in society.

Worse yet, i'm beginning to agree with it. 

Predjudiced yes .... judging by what i see there's every good reason to be.

I don't have time for the drama and there's little here to hold my intrest so i'm just going on ahead.

And THIS is how one idiot can make an entire forum of women want to slice his nads into sushi. :lulz:

I am no longer shocked or even amused by that collection of useless fucking dirtbags.  They jumped the shark years ago, and all they have left is the need to endlessly justify their bigotry to themselves and everyone around them.

They are scum, and it's time we all left them behind.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:14:55 PM
What the hell?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:15:16 PM
Goddammit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:18:06 PM
That was.... unexpected.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:22:49 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:18:06 PM
That was.... unexpected.

Well, I've fucking had it.  I can't keep feeling like I'm walking on eggshells, especially when it comes to fucking assholes like Blue and his pals at TCC.  I'm also sick and fucking tired of being told what bad people we are by the EB&G crowd, and having them stomp out in a huff. 

For serious.  I was all happy that I was going to be in San Diego, but Jenne wouldn't respond to PMs or VM.  Khara freaks out and leaves at the drop of a hat.  We aren't good enough for Charley.

Fuck that noise.  Not even bothering, anymore.  They can come or they can go, and it will make no difference to me.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:26:48 PM
Well, I've always felt I was rather unwanted at EB&G, regardless of who was in charge, so all I can say is "welcome to the Wrong Sides of the Track Crew."

Again.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:29:15 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:26:48 PM
Well, I've always felt I was rather unwanted at EB&G, regardless of who was in charge, so all I can say is "welcome to the Wrong Sides of the Track Crew."

Again.

Yep.  I might still be an admin there, and I'm definitely unwanted.  Or at least I fail to live up to expectations.

So why burden people with my utter and complete failure at being a human being, right?   :lulz:

TGRR,
Not good enough for the Good People.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on January 23, 2012, 07:30:42 PM
Umm. Clearly, I missed something.  :?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:32:02 PM
Quote from: Doktor M. Phox0 on January 23, 2012, 07:30:42 PM
Umm. Clearly, I missed something.  :?

Yep.  Post was deleted.  My reply at the bottom of the last page quoted it, though.  There was no reason to delete it, and I WILL NOT WALK AROUND TERRIFIED OF OFFENDING PEOPLE WITH INOFFENSIVE THINGS.

END OF STORY.

TGRR,
Quite pissed off atm.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:33:40 PM
Quote from: Doktor M. Phox0 on January 23, 2012, 07:30:42 PM
Umm. Clearly, I missed something.  :?

Where Roger quotes "Whatever", that post existed just before his.  He posted, then it vanished, presumably because Whatever took offence to it.

Like she does to a lot of things, really.  It's all rather predictable.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on January 23, 2012, 07:34:50 PM
Riight.

Ok then.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:35:48 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:29:15 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:26:48 PM
Well, I've always felt I was rather unwanted at EB&G, regardless of who was in charge, so all I can say is "welcome to the Wrong Sides of the Track Crew."

Again.

Yep.  I might still be an admin there, and I'm definitely unwanted.  Or at least I fail to live up to expectations.

So why burden people with my utter and complete failure at being a human being, right?   :lulz:

TGRR,
Not good enough for the Good People.

I wonder if my little hate thread is still going on over there?  It was amazing, I wasn't even there for a week, and they were still posting in it about how much of a bastard I am, because, er, well, it was never really explained.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:38:36 PM
Quote from: Jenne on January 23, 2012, 07:34:50 PM
Riight.

Ok then.

At which point am I being inaccurate?

You know what?  I don't care.  Don't bother.  The whole tribe is back in Tucson, and I'm going to hang out with my son and our friends, who have never told us or expressed the opinion that we don't measure up or are not in fact even worthy of a return phone call, etc.

Be back tonight, for those that can stand my presence.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Whatever on January 23, 2012, 07:39:16 PM
I went to add one more section in MODIFY and freaking hit REMOVE.   :argh!:

Trying to do shit on the sly at work.....

Give me a bit, my phone started ringing off the hook.....
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on January 23, 2012, 07:42:08 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:38:36 PM
Quote from: Jenne on January 23, 2012, 07:34:50 PM
Riight.

Ok then.

At which point am I being inaccurate?

You know what?  I don't care.  Don't bother.  The whole tribe is back in Tucson, and I'm going to hang out with my son and our friends, who have never told us or expressed the opinion that we don't measure up or are not in fact even worthy of a return phone call, etc.

Be back tonight, for those that can stand my presence.
FEED THAT BOYA!  :madbanana:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on January 23, 2012, 07:42:52 PM
Originally posted for the lulz and removed in error....  Sorry :(

I can piss people off everywhere......   :lulz: 

From TCC http://wicca.com/forums/index.php?topic=7578.0 (http://wicca.com/forums/index.php?topic=7578.0)

Quote from: Khara
I'm sorry, are you saying women are scared because of their hormones?

Quote from: blue
This one is easy. Take a transgender male who is seeking gender reassignment. The first thing they do is begin hormone therapy ... right ?

Same with female to male. Add testosterone and she will experience a different way of looking at the world. It's likely to make her more bold and assertive.

Fight or flight .... timid or bold .... what your attractions are ....personality traits .... whatever .... it's all a product of that unique biochemical reaction that's going on inside your body and brain.

Quote from: Khara
I just....

I don't even.....

WHAT. THE. FVCK?  Are you freaking serious?  Are you high?  Women will run from danger?  Women are timid?  Women have personality traits based on their hormones? 

Have you never seen a mother protecting her child?  Do women not serve right beside men in the military these days, since such antiquated, pre-feminism, idiotic male viewpoints were shot to shit?

I cannot believe in this century anyone still can believe such lies.

Also, hormones do not affect emotions, emotions affect hormones.....

Quote from: Khara
I am going to have to admit something here that I rarely admit. 

This has left me just fvcking speechless......

I can't get mad because it is based on ignorance and prejudice.  Yet I am mad because it is based on ignorance and prejudice.

Quote from: blue
Don't get mad Khara. It's just my view of things that's all. Years ago i think i would have been more in agreement with the groupthink. Now i'm beginning to undrstand why, historically,women have always been relegated to the role of second class citizens in society.

Worse yet, i'm beginning to agree with it. 

Predjudiced yes .... judging by what i see there's every good reason to be.

I don't have time for the drama and there's little here to hold my intrest so i'm just going on ahead.

And THIS is how one idiot can make an entire forum of women want to slice his nads into sushi. :lulz:

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on January 23, 2012, 07:45:00 PM
I guess my unborn child crisis was just too unimportant.

NO, I get it.

When I'm in a personal crisis, I need to shove it up your asses and make it stink around here.

Not go somewhere where I can just deal with it quietly.

Oh fuck no.

Next time, I'm going to post livejournal fucking thread after thread so that EVERYBODY gets to fucking suffer along with me.

I know, FUCK ME RAW AND BLEEDING for having the fucking personal dignity to not bleed my lack of good karma everywhere for ya'll to listen to, read ad nauseum.

Yeah.

OPEN UP THAT OPEN BAR.  IT'S WHAT THE PUBLIC DEMANDS.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:46:37 PM
My memory isn't what it was, and I didn't remember the PM concerning the dates you were receiving treatment.

Not the dates, I didn't even remember the PM.

You have my apology.  I was acting like an ass.




Also, Khara.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on January 23, 2012, 07:47:29 PM
You know what, I'm sorry, I am at fucking work.  I was trying to add in a part that was there and I hit remove in error.  My phone was and has been ringing off the hook so I couldn't get back right away.

Thanks for all the presumptions.

I won't bother anymore, which you will also say is typical I'm sure, however, JUST FUCKING ONCE it would be nice to get the FUCKING BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT before I'm slammed.

I mean y'all would demand it but fuck me right?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:49:01 PM
Fuck.  Okay, apologies thrown back in my face.

Lesson learned.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:51:41 PM
Self-righteous lecturing is definitely going to win more people over to your side of this Khara, I'm certain.

No-one in the history of all PD has ever been oppressed quite like you are.

Anyway, I'm off to abuse students now, so feel free to use this thread to tell people how terrible and unfair myself and Roger are.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on January 23, 2012, 07:53:53 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:49:01 PM
Fuck.  Okay, apologies thrown back in my face.

Lesson learned.
I was responding to all the bullshit from the previous page, look at the post times there. 

And again, BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT!!!

We posted at the same time...

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on January 23, 2012, 08:02:49 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:49:01 PM
Fuck.  Okay, apologies thrown back in my face.

Lesson learned.

And again I sincerely apologize.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 23, 2012, 08:20:01 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 23, 2012, 06:15:53 PM
QuotePERSONALLY i believe that onlya DRAGON should answer questions about dragons. Mr.E should stick to the Fae, as that is what he is, and I shall not believe what he says. I have myself spoken with an elusive clan, and although we are no longer in contact they would agree with me in this.

http://www.realfairies.net/forum/mr-e/mr-e-answers-more-dragon-questions

lolz

OMG

You are shitting me!  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 23, 2012, 08:31:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:22:49 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 23, 2012, 07:18:06 PM
That was.... unexpected.

Well, I've fucking had it.  I can't keep feeling like I'm walking on eggshells, especially when it comes to fucking assholes like Blue and his pals at TCC.  I'm also sick and fucking tired of being told what bad people we are by the EB&G crowd, and having them stomp out in a huff. 

For serious.  I was all happy that I was going to be in San Diego, but Jenne wouldn't respond to PMs or VM.  Khara freaks out and leaves at the drop of a hat.  We aren't good enough for Charley.

Fuck that noise.  Not even bothering, anymore.  They can come or they can go, and it will make no difference to me.

Khara has a hard-on for being picked on, to the extent that if nobody's picking on her she'll just make it up. Fuck, Khara has twice, recently, freaked out because I was oppressing her, except that the posts she took offense to weren't replies to her, made no sense as replies to her, and has nothing whatsoever to do with her. One of them was posted literally four seconds after her post, so not only did it make no literal sense as a reply, it was temporally impossible as a reply. But when that was clarified, not only did she not apologize, she didn't even acknowledge, in either case, her mistake. And at one point, she accused me of being "venomous" toward Jenne, which I think was just a ploy to try to get Jenne pissed at me. In my opinion, she has a hard-on for people hating each other, and I don't doubt there are PMs going back and forth about how mean certain people are and how they have it out for certain other people yadda yadda.

I won't touch EB&G with a 20-foot pole and I'm a mod there. That place is toxic as fuck, in that kind of nicey-nice, sugar-sweet, butter-won't-melt-in-our-mouths backstabby way.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 23, 2012, 08:42:38 PM
Quote from: Khara on January 23, 2012, 07:47:29 PM
You know what, I'm sorry, I am at fucking work.  I was trying to add in a part that was there and I hit remove in error.  My phone was and has been ringing off the hook so I couldn't get back right away.

Thanks for all the presumptions.

I won't bother anymore, which you will also say is typical I'm sure, however, JUST FUCKING ONCE it would be nice to get the FUCKING BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT before I'm slammed.

I mean y'all would demand it but fuck me right?

Why do  you think you deserve the benefit of the doubt when you do shit like that ALL THE FUCKING TIME? At the drop of a hat, with or without any actual cause?

Why would anyone even pause for a half a second to wonder whether you're maybe NOT doing, again, the very thing you are known and noted for doing?

Do you know the premise of the boy who cried wolf? If you want to be taken seriously, ever again, it will be after an extended period of time where you DON'T flip out, delete posts, change your handle, or flounce after a barely-critical or completely unrelated post from which you extrapolated that someone might kind of possibly disagree with or dislike something you may or may not have done or said.

You have a boner for being a victim, and I'm sick of walking on eggshells where your posts are concerned, so I'm not going to anymore, and you can suck it up and be a biped about it or you can be a whiny flouncy victim baby-pie. Either way, not really caring.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on January 23, 2012, 08:42:51 PM
If those of you impugning EB&G actually spent time there, you'd see the opposite.

But whatever.  The never-ending, cyclical campaign to drag EB&G into the mud just makes me yawn.

Khara's actually a very loyal and wonderful friend.  I think if she's paranoid HERE, it's warranted.  Her life is not an easy road to hoe, and yet I think she approaches it bravely and with verve.  Not many can say they do the same.  In a good fight, she'd have your back and not second guess. Ever.

As for my absence here and there, my personal life encroached.

My apologies to those who felt "left behind"--I never did that, I pm'd those who'd I thought would miss me.  My bad if I needed to badger them a bit more.

Ok, I'm out.

I'll be at the ALL EVIL ALL THE TIME HATES NIGEL AND CAIN NEVER WANTS THEM BACK EVER NEVER EVER PLACE--I mean EB&G (which, really, it's a hole in the wall where occasionally stars like Vincent shine for us, and sometimes old timers come back, and friends just shoot the shit--it's rather silly and weak to think otherwise).

*smirk, and goes back to LURK
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 23, 2012, 08:45:53 PM
Quote from: Jenne on January 23, 2012, 08:42:51 PM
If those of you impugning EB&G actually spent time there, you'd see the opposite.

But whatever.  The never-ending, cyclical campaign to drag EB&G into the mud just makes me yawn.

Khara's actually a very loyal and wonderful friend.  I think if she's paranoid HERE, it's warranted.  Her life is not an easy road to hoe, and yet I think she approaches it bravely and with verve.  Not many can say they do the same.  In a good fight, she'd have your back and not second guess. Ever.

As for my absence here and there, my personal life encroached.

My apologies to those who felt "left behind"--I never did that, I pm'd those who'd I thought would miss me.  My bad if I needed to badger them a bit more.

Ok, I'm out.

I'll be at the ALL EVIL ALL THE TIME HATES NIGEL AND CAIN NEVER WANTS THEM BACK EVER NEVER EVER PLACE--I mean EB&G (which, really, it's a hole in the wall where occasionally stars like Vincent shine for us, and sometimes old timers come back, and friends just shoot the shit--it's rather silly and weak to think otherwise).

*smirk, and goes back to LURK

I used to spend time there. I stopped because of the threads about me, about Cain, about various other people here that your clique doesn't like.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on January 23, 2012, 08:55:09 PM
"OH SHIT!"

What my son yells out every night after tubby time in an attempt to say "lotion". 

It's hilarious in that 'kids say the darnedest things" kinda way. 

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 23, 2012, 09:34:38 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 23, 2012, 08:42:38 PM
Do you know the premise of the boy who cried wolf?

Exactly what I thought.  Complaining because people thought you were doing something which, if you reflected on it, you are guilty of fairly often, is more of an indictment on the behaviour of that person than the people who jumped to the conclusion.

And Jenne, I have been on EB&G.  In fact, I was on EB&G before there was an EB&G.  I am part of the reason an EB&G even exists.  Yet, I've never really been that welcome there, have I?  Even when I was doing everyone's dirty work at MW, and boy was some of that dirty, I was always someone to be kept at arms length, out of the picture, not trusted.

Kinda rankles, when you put that kind of effort in, only to be disregarded in turn, have lies spread about you, have double standards inflicted on you.

Sure, you in particular are not very guilty of that.  But it seems that since 2006 or so, no matter who has been at the helm, I've been the subject of gossip and lies and outright attacks on my character, for not especially good reasons.  You might understand after, how five years of that, I may have a dim view of the place.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: BadBeast on January 23, 2012, 10:53:59 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 23, 2012, 08:20:01 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 23, 2012, 06:15:53 PM
QuotePERSONALLY i believe that onlya DRAGON should answer questions about dragons. Mr.E should stick to the Fae, as that is what he is, and I shall not believe what he says. I have myself spoken with an elusive clan, and although we are no longer in contact they would agree with me in this.

http://www.realfairies.net/forum/mr-e/mr-e-answers-more-dragon-questions

lolz

OMG

You are shitting me!  :lulz:
So are Dragon Furries called "Scalys?" Because they should be.
Unless this is a forum for Retarded Reptilian Kids. Who aren't clebur nuff for the David Icke forums. Or Royal enough to be stalked by *Insert drooling, bug eyed Royal stalker of choice*
Either way, gotta be worth a bit of a Troll. What colour are Dragon eggs btw? (Just in case I end up looking stupid)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 24, 2012, 12:49:02 AM
Quote from: Cain on January 23, 2012, 09:34:38 PM
I am part of the reason an EB&G even exists. 

I'd say about 99% of the reason, with the remaining 1% being ECH, Efrim, and myself.

But what have we done lately?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 24, 2012, 12:49:36 AM
Quote from: Khara on January 23, 2012, 08:02:49 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2012, 07:49:01 PM
Fuck.  Okay, apologies thrown back in my face.

Lesson learned.

And again I sincerely apologize.

S'ok.  Let's just let it drop.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Jenne on January 24, 2012, 03:39:01 AM
Quote from: Cain on January 23, 2012, 09:34:38 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 23, 2012, 08:42:38 PM
Do you know the premise of the boy who cried wolf?

Exactly what I thought.  Complaining because people thought you were doing something which, if you reflected on it, you are guilty of fairly often, is more of an indictment on the behaviour of that person than the people who jumped to the conclusion.

And Jenne, I have been on EB&G.  In fact, I was on EB&G before there was an EB&G.  I am part of the reason an EB&G even exists.  Yet, I've never really been that welcome there, have I?  Even when I was doing everyone's dirty work at MW, and boy was some of that dirty, I was always someone to be kept at arms length, out of the picture, not trusted.

Kinda rankles, when you put that kind of effort in, only to be disregarded in turn, have lies spread about you, have double standards inflicted on you.

Sure, you in particular are not very guilty of that.  But it seems that since 2006 or so, no matter who has been at the helm, I've been the subject of gossip and lies and outright attacks on my character, for not especially good reasons.  You might understand after, how five years of that, I may have a dim view of the place.

I had a nice long dramatic feeding the llama post that the two of you are crying out for.  Fuck that.

1) Ancient history.  You haven't posted anything worth anything in a long time at EB&G (coming on over to taunt the animals in their cages is not really anything to write home about).  Get the fuck over it.  Bella's gone.  Long gone.  Same with Dan.

2)  See #1.

Nigel, the DAY you get to chide ME for having a CLIQUE...BAHAHAHAHAA.

nuff said.

(anyone wondering why I left yet and decided to lurk?  anyone...?  Bueller? I'm far too fucking hormonal and jacked up on IRL idiotic drama to want to handle this bullshit.)

Damn I am sorry I saw this thread.  But it was a good lesson to relearn.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on January 24, 2012, 10:58:42 AM
I appreciate PD.COM and EB&G for the different communities that they are, and have been, for the past few years.  EB&G on more than one occassion have played a bit of a life-raft role as did POEE when this place would go dark with technical difficulties.  I used to be a lot more active over there than I am now, but it isn't for any kind of lack of respect or any ill will against that community.  It's simply time.  I've always felt the same way about POEE too.  Again, another great Discordian on-line community that offers something a little different.  I give kudos to Jenne, Khara and crew for keeping that going over there.  I think it is a good thing to foster the online diversity in our overall Discordian community. 
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on January 24, 2012, 01:01:57 PM
At band practice last night, Steve came up with a skronky guitar riff, which we tried building off of.

We take a break, and Andy says, "John, you need to work out a complimentary part to go with that guitar."

We start playing again.  John walks up to the mic and says, "Steve, I really like your shirt.  Have you lost weight?  My, you certainly look handsome tonight."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on January 24, 2012, 01:09:50 PM
Definitely need coffee. It took me too long to get what you were saying lmno
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on January 24, 2012, 01:43:13 PM
So, there we were, Richter and I, having dinner at a nice restaurant.  (By "nice," I mean they let uss sit down, look at printed menus rather than a backlit board with pictures on it, came and asked us what we wanted, and brought us food on real plates rather than in paper boxes.)

He'd finished, I was still picking at my steak, when he announces, "I am going to go make something hilarious happen to the bathroom."  I figure I already have more detail than I stictly need, but finish my dinner as he strides purposefully into the little alcove in which they hide the bathroom doors.

I think nothing of it for the next few minutes, other than offering up a prayer for the soul of whoever is in charge of cleaning that bathroom that evening, until I look up and see, scurrying from the alcove, a typical Fall River gangbanger type, exiting the area with a look of utter horror on his face.

I have mentally filed that restaurant on the list of places we can't go until the statute of limitations runs out.

Pity, the steak was good.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on January 24, 2012, 04:55:24 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 24, 2012, 01:01:57 PM
At band practice last night, Steve came up with a skronky guitar riff, which we tried building off of.

We take a break, and Andy says, "John, you need to work out a complimentary part to go with that guitar."

We start playing again.  John walks up to the mic and says, "Steve, I really like your shirt.  Have you lost weight?  My, you certainly look handsome tonight."

You should record that shit.  Seriously.  Some running spoken-word complimentary commentary on top of that skronky guitar riff.  (Not that I fully understand what that means)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on January 31, 2012, 06:17:57 PM
One of my cousins:

Today I fell asleep in the pool at the y and I woke up to my little sister nibbling on my toes. She said that she was hungry, now I'm afraid to sleep.

I haven't met this little girl, but she sounds kind of terrifying.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on February 02, 2012, 02:42:44 PM
Went to a steakhouse with the roommates last night. On the way home, we took a wrong turn and ended up in a very spooky neighborhood. I must have driven over a plastic bag or something, because my car was making really scary un-carlike noises which we assumed were ghosts.

I forgot to check out my car when I got home, so I left myself a note, "Is my car haunted?"

I didn't see a bag this morning, and the car's not making the noise, but the answer is still yes. Driving to work this morning was creepy as hell!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on February 04, 2012, 07:50:22 AM
From Gasland (http://www.gaslandthemovie.com/), when the bill that would have shut the "Halliburton loophole" that exempts oil and gas companies from several environmental acts having to report the chemicals used in fraking fluid under the Safe Drinking Water act was on the committee table:

Mr. Boren: I think what Mr. Appleton is doing is searching for a problem that does not exist, because looking at all these other examples in all these states, there has not been a problem with hydraulic fracturing and I'm proud that I'm supported by the oil and gas industry because they employ a lot people in my state and I'm going to stick up for them and I am tired of people trying to shut down the industry when they're not educated on the facts. And if you weren't able to do this hydraulic fracturing, how much more dependent would we be on foreign oil? And terrorism.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on February 16, 2012, 07:24:17 PM
Treat everyone you meet like God in drag.

           -Ram Dass
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on February 16, 2012, 07:41:52 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on February 04, 2012, 07:50:22 AM
From Gasland (http://www.gaslandthemovie.com/), when the bill that would have shut the "Halliburton loophole" that exempts oil and gas companies from several environmental acts having to report the chemicals used in fraking fluid under the Safe Drinking Water act was on the committee table:

Mr. Boren: I think what Mr. Appleton is doing is searching for a problem that does not exist, because looking at all these other examples in all these states, there has not been a problem with hydraulic fracturing and I'm proud that I'm supported by the oil and gas industry because they employ a lot people in my state and I'm going to stick up for them and I am tired of people trying to shut down the industry when they're not educated on the facts. And if you weren't able to do this hydraulic fracturing, how much more dependent would we be on foreign oil? And terrorism.

This is fucking AWESOME.

A total non-statement followed by "And Terrorism".

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on February 16, 2012, 11:44:06 PM
I know, right? :lulz: I had to stop and replay it to make sure I heard right.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on February 17, 2012, 04:03:44 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 16, 2012, 07:41:52 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on February 04, 2012, 07:50:22 AM
From Gasland (http://www.gaslandthemovie.com/), when the bill that would have shut the "Halliburton loophole" that exempts oil and gas companies from several environmental acts having to report the chemicals used in fraking fluid under the Safe Drinking Water act was on the committee table:

Mr. Boren: I think what Mr. Appleton is doing is searching for a problem that does not exist, because looking at all these other examples in all these states, there has not been a problem with hydraulic fracturing and I'm proud that I'm supported by the oil and gas industry because they employ a lot people in my state and I'm going to stick up for them and I am tired of people trying to shut down the industry when they're not educated on the facts. And if you weren't able to do this hydraulic fracturing, how much more dependent would we be on foreign oil? And terrorism.

This is fucking AWESOME.

A total non-statement followed by "And Terrorism".

:lulz:

I like it because, taken literally, it implies that we are already heavily dependent on terrorism.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on February 17, 2012, 07:42:31 AM
Foreign terrorism, no less.

It's not like the good old days under Clinton, when you could rely on Americans to step up to the challenge of conducting terrorism.  Under Chairman B. HUSSEIN Obama, it's all foreign and government sponsored and shit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on February 23, 2012, 01:44:38 PM
I realize the truth of what my friend, Doctor Ishmael once told me before he became a psychology professor: "You spend so much time in the alleys looking for the maniac who is going to kill you. And then one day, you realize you ARE the maniac in the alley." Since he once chased a hippie with a machete for getting too close to his art studio shack, you know he's a quality person—or at least you know his heart is in the right place.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on February 23, 2012, 04:28:29 PM
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: Nice.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on March 11, 2012, 10:35:03 PM
I was telling my mother about why our downtown is as terrible as it is, and had to explain the Nazi who is the reason why.

Garbo: And he [Karl Falk] wrote a long screed about the evils of American journalism and how it was filled with Jews.
Garbo!Mom: The poor Jews.
Garbo: They're kind of the world's scapegoat.
Garbo!Mom: They should not have rejected their Messiah.
Garbo: (https://s3.amazonaws.com/data.tumblr.com/tumblr_m0frks0kSs1qfcnkr.gif)
Garbo!Mom: I'm sure they still go to heaven, though.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on March 12, 2012, 03:34:25 PM
Wow.   :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on March 12, 2012, 04:48:23 PM
You don't even know. Conversations turn into shit like this a couple times a month.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on March 12, 2012, 06:45:13 PM

I explained my larding adventure to my now not-so-current man-flingy-thingy that ended after I explained my larding adventure.

"Surely," I say, "We must do this to John. We HAVE to."

"Uh heh heh, I just don't want to be confused for a hipster."

:tyra:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 12, 2012, 11:20:51 PM
Quote from: Alty on March 12, 2012, 06:45:13 PM

I explained my larding adventure to my now not-so-current man-flingy-thingy that ended after I explained my larding adventure.

"Surely," I say, "We must do this to John. We HAVE to."

"Uh heh heh, I just don't want to be confused for a hipster."

:tyra:

:crankey:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on March 15, 2012, 01:02:34 AM
Gramma: Why aren't you eating my lasagna?

Me: It has ground beef in it. I don't eat beef anymore.

Gramma: What? You're a vegetarian? What the fuck is wrong with you!?

Me: No! I just can't digest it, it makes me sick.

Gramma: Since when has my food ever made you sick?

Me: It doesn't, it's the meat.

Gramma: Does your father know you're a vegetarian? He'll kill you.

Me: I'm NOT a vegetarian, Gramma. I can't eat beef! It makes me sick!

Gramma: I can't believe you come all this way to Long Island and you don't want to eat my cooking...

Me: That's not it!

Cousin: Holy fuck...Grams, she can't eat beef, she has an intolerance. It will make her sick.

Aunt: Angela, why aren't you eating meat? Is it because you've gotten into Communism?

Me in unison with another cousin: WHAT THE FUCK?!

Gramma: You drive all the way out from Brooklyn with your cousin from dinner and didn't bother to call me ONCE to tell me that you aren't eating meat anymore. If your grandfather were alive, he'd shove it down your throat!

Me: Holy. Shit. I will eat the fucking lasagna!

Lesson to be learned: Food intolerance and allergies are never worth arguing over with old Italian women. Ever.

...The drive back to Brooklyn on the Southern State was pretty amusing as my intestines protested. :(


Monday:

*walking in downtown Manhattan out of sheer boredom*

Me: What a freaking shitshow.

Construction worker: No fucking shit, eh?

Me: You must love your job.

Worker: Yes, I get to sit here for four fucking hours at a time with nothing but a bottle of water to beat the shit outta foreign tourists who try to climb the fence to look at holes in the ground. It ain't even done yet!

Me: Terrorism is Tourism, my friend.

Worker: Hey, I like that!

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on March 15, 2012, 01:20:25 AM
Richter on the phone: Anyways, I have to go now before the hipsters run me out. Yes I'm talking about you, you pink shirt motherfucker I ate your mom.....I have to go. *click*
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 19, 2012, 03:30:24 AM
MO: Your dog is stupid.
EFO: No she's not.
MO: Yes she is.
EFO: Okay fine. [boy's dog], you're blind.
MO: You can't make fun of a cripple!
EFO: You can't make fun of a retard!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 19, 2012, 03:31:01 AM
Quote from: Suu on March 15, 2012, 01:20:25 AM
Richter on the phone: Anyways, I have to go now before the hipsters run me out. Yes I'm talking about you, you pink shirt motherfucker I ate your mom.....I have to go. *click*

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on March 23, 2012, 04:25:33 AM
Quote from: Suu on March 15, 2012, 01:20:25 AM
Richter on the phone: Anyways, I have to go now before the hipsters run me out. Yes I'm talking about you, you pink shirt motherfucker I ate your mom.....I have to go. *click*

:lulz: :lulz: :mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on March 23, 2012, 06:43:16 AM
After explaining my most recent life-goals:

"Alty, I am going to say this because I know nobody else in your life is going to: I'm sorry for all of the things that have happened to you in your life, all of the experiences with people that you've have that have brought you to this point in your life. I'm sorry."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 23, 2012, 05:36:22 PM
Quote from: Alty on March 23, 2012, 06:43:16 AM
After explaining my most recent life-goals:

"Alty, I am going to say this because I know nobody else in your life is going to: I'm sorry for all of the things that have happened to you in your life, all of the experiences with people that you've have that have brought you to this point in your life. I'm sorry."

What the fuck?  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on March 23, 2012, 05:38:08 PM
Quote from: Alty on March 23, 2012, 06:43:16 AM
After explaining my most recent life-goals:

"Alty, I am going to say this because I know nobody else in your life is going to: I'm sorry for all of the things that have happened to you in your life, all of the experiences with people that you've have that have brought you to this point in your life. I'm sorry."

I am unsure if I should extend sympathy or congratulations.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on March 23, 2012, 05:53:36 PM
I took it with a grain of salt as this fellow has also said that he's a "hate the sin not the sinner" type and, being Christian, has alluded to the fact that the Jews sure have a lot of bad luck maybe it's for a very specific reason.
He's very nice and never swears.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on March 23, 2012, 05:56:30 PM
You know who else never swore but insisted the Jews had a lot of bad luck for a specific reason?

HITLER, THAT'S WHO!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Chairman Risus on March 23, 2012, 06:19:28 PM
Alty, stop taking advice from Hitler.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on March 23, 2012, 10:46:19 PM
Risus: "alty, stop taking advice from hitler"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mangrove on March 28, 2012, 09:44:08 PM
My friend said this yesterday:

"Steampunks are just goths who discovered brown."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on March 28, 2012, 10:21:46 PM
"The utility of having contacts with an up-and-coming chicken suit operation is ENDLESS"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on March 29, 2012, 10:54:28 AM
Quote from: Mangrove on March 28, 2012, 09:44:08 PM
My friend said this yesterday:

"Steampunks are just goths who discovered brown."

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 29, 2012, 04:06:15 PM
Quote from: Mangrove on March 28, 2012, 09:44:08 PM
My friend said this yesterday:

"Steampunks are just goths who discovered brown."

More accurate words have never been uttered.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on March 29, 2012, 07:27:59 PM
Well, I'd add to their list of discoveries:

They replaced skull motifs with gears

They read maybe a Jules Verne book or two instead of Anne Rice

And, um... they created movement that is based pretty much entirely on a visual style, even though it has the suffix "-punk", I guess? At least Goth has music associated with it; Steampunk music is pretty token and it's quite hard to find anything that actually sounds good.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 29, 2012, 08:08:54 PM
Quote from: Cainad on March 29, 2012, 07:27:59 PM
Well, I'd add to their list of discoveries:

They replaced skull motifs with gears

They read maybe a Jules Verne book or two instead of Anne Rice

And, um... they created movement that is based pretty much entirely on a visual style, even though it has the suffix "-punk", I guess? At least Goth has music associated with it; Steampunk music is pretty token and it's quite hard to find anything that actually sounds good.

It's based in literature, is why.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on March 29, 2012, 08:37:44 PM
The Smashing Pumpkins have had a steampunkish vibe to them at times post-Siamese Dream.  Though they may be a bit long in the tooth to have been co-opted by the steam punkers. 
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on March 29, 2012, 09:36:25 PM
Quote from: Nigel on March 29, 2012, 08:08:54 PM
Quote from: Cainad on March 29, 2012, 07:27:59 PM
Well, I'd add to their list of discoveries:

They replaced skull motifs with gears

They read maybe a Jules Verne book or two instead of Anne Rice

And, um... they created movement that is based pretty much entirely on a visual style, even though it has the suffix "-punk", I guess? At least Goth has music associated with it; Steampunk music is pretty token and it's quite hard to find anything that actually sounds good.

It's based in literature, is why.

Literature that was written by cyberpunk authors, based on Verne and Wells and Shelly. Hence the -punk.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:39:44 PM
Quote from: Cainad on March 29, 2012, 07:27:59 PM
Steampunk music is pretty token and it's quite hard to find anything that actually sounds good.

Because there isn't any.

Dok,
Thinks Abney Park should be sent through a car shredder.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on March 29, 2012, 09:42:33 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:39:44 PM
Quote from: Cainad on March 29, 2012, 07:27:59 PM
Steampunk music is pretty token and it's quite hard to find anything that actually sounds good.

Because there isn't any.

Dok,
Thinks Abney Park should be sent through a car shredder.

And Coyote has no taste in music. :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:46:39 PM
Quote from: Guru Coyote on March 29, 2012, 09:42:33 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:39:44 PM
Quote from: Cainad on March 29, 2012, 07:27:59 PM
Steampunk music is pretty token and it's quite hard to find anything that actually sounds good.

Because there isn't any.

Dok,
Thinks Abney Park should be sent through a car shredder.

And Coyote has no taste in music. :lulz:

That's because you hate Johnny Cash and love Osama Bin Ladin.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on March 29, 2012, 09:48:11 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:46:39 PM
Quote from: Guru Coyote on March 29, 2012, 09:42:33 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:39:44 PM
Quote from: Cainad on March 29, 2012, 07:27:59 PM
Steampunk music is pretty token and it's quite hard to find anything that actually sounds good.

Because there isn't any.

Dok,
Thinks Abney Park should be sent through a car shredder.

And Coyote has no taste in music. :lulz:

That's because you hate Johnny Cash and love Osama Bin Ladin.

I builded shrines to both and summoned their spirits into stoats so as to divine who was the betterest by way of mortal stoat combat.
The Cash-Stoat was torn apart in less than 2 minutes.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:50:11 PM
Quote from: Guru Coyote on March 29, 2012, 09:48:11 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:46:39 PM
Quote from: Guru Coyote on March 29, 2012, 09:42:33 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on March 29, 2012, 09:39:44 PM
Quote from: Cainad on March 29, 2012, 07:27:59 PM
Steampunk music is pretty token and it's quite hard to find anything that actually sounds good.

Because there isn't any.

Dok,
Thinks Abney Park should be sent through a car shredder.

And Coyote has no taste in music. :lulz:

That's because you hate Johnny Cash and love Osama Bin Ladin.

I builded shrines to both and summoned their spirits into stoats so as to divine who was the betterest by way of mortal stoat combat.
The Cash-Stoat was torn apart in less than 2 minutes.

Yeah, but that's because you let the Bin Ladin stoat start with a chainsaw.

Reminds me of a fight I got in, once.  It was as fair as you get.  I had a baseball bat, and he had emphysema.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: navkat on March 29, 2012, 10:50:09 PM
Retro-futurism is a beloved theme of mine and even moreso after I learned that I didn't coin that phrase. There's something delicious about presumptive modernism seen through the lense of nostalgia and something more delicious about what I'm now going to call Recursive Futurist Nostalgia: based on the supposition that "In the future, they'll be so advanced, they'll bring those obsolete designs and make them even more futuristic!" Hunger Games did this.

The concept embodies more than just Steampunk and when someone said Cyberpunk, you hit it on the head. It comes from the same place: looking back fondly at out naive hopes about progress. I'm thinking:
Art Deco > Metropolis > Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow.
Spacey-looking 1950's Diners, Airstreams, rocketships, the belief we'd all be eating astronaut ice cream by now.
The World's Fair.
late-60s Mod design. Bakelite. Bauhaus.

Cyberpunk is ours: Bladerunner. Johnny Mnemonic. Total Recall. Glittering dystopia.

I love it. I wonder how 12 Monkeys and Repo Men and Minority Report will look to others in 80 years.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on March 29, 2012, 10:56:15 PM
Quote from: navkat on March 29, 2012, 10:50:09 PM
I love it. I wonder how 12 Monkeys and Repo Men and Minority Report will look to others in 80 years.
12 Monkey's will be considered just one of a long string of predictable movies.
Minority report will be a footnote in a somewhat popular philosophy paper, causing most people to only know it's main memes through the paper.
Repo Men will be completely eclipsed by Repo: The Genetic Opera. (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0963194/)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: navkat on March 29, 2012, 11:15:22 PM
Gattica was killer for me because it was a perfect hybrid of 1950s hopeful "space race" cosmonaut thing and our present-day Medical advances/biometrics/you can't game the system because They're keeping track" aesthetics.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on March 30, 2012, 01:19:02 PM
So, I found myself in a record store last night with Mrs LMNO.  I have a weakness for jazz from the 40's and 50's on vinyl*.  Anyway, who should be behind the counter?  The Smartest Guy in the Record Store.  Hipster glasses, cheap ill-fitting hat, second-hand tweed blazer, some sort of French sneaker that fastens with velcro.  He starts talking to me, and right away I pick up that he's playing the Obscurity Game.  Problem is, I know every group he's referencing.  Finally, the talk turns to new releases.

SGitRS: Yeah, Best Coast and Beach House are releasing their albums on the same day next month.  Highly anticipated.

Me: What I'm really looking forward to is the new three-CD set of unreleased Can tapes in June, from '67-'77.**

SGitRS: [blank look]

Me: You've probably never heard of them.  They were pretty underground. 

Mrs LMNO:  :lulz:

Me: :ECH:















*Old habits die hard.
**I really am looking forward to that.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 30, 2012, 07:18:59 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on March 30, 2012, 01:19:02 PM
So, I found myself in a record store last night with Mrs LMNO.  I have a weakness for jazz from the 40's and 50's on vinyl*.  Anyway, who should be behind the counter?  The Smartest Guy in the Record Store.  Hipster glasses, cheap ill-fitting hat, second-hand tweed blazer, some sort of French sneaker that fastens with velcro.  He starts talking to me, and right away I pick up that he's playing the Obscurity Game.  Problem is, I know every group he's referencing.  Finally, the talk turns to new releases.

SGitRS: Yeah, Best Coast and Beach House are releasing their albums on the same day next month.  Highly anticipated.

Me: What I'm really looking forward to is the new three-CD set of unreleased Can tapes in June, from '67-'77.**

SGitRS: [blank look]

Me: You've probably never heard of them.  They were pretty underground. 

Mrs LMNO:  :lulz:

Me: :ECH:















*Old habits die hard.
**I really am looking forward to that.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on March 30, 2012, 07:20:00 PM
LMNO is my shordurpersav.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on March 30, 2012, 07:42:33 PM
I'm honored, even if I did have to Google that.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on March 30, 2012, 07:45:35 PM
Heh thats awesome.

Also thanks for that info- you recommended can to me sometime last year.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on April 01, 2012, 09:46:46 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on March 30, 2012, 07:20:00 PM
shordurpersav.

Shit, now i'm re-evaluating several situations where i  regretted having lost contact with someone.
Transience can be good, repeat untill i believe it.

Also, cool! new word!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on April 07, 2012, 04:23:13 AM
Via text:

Pickles: Can you watch [Pickleson] for an hour?
Me: That would be kinda creepy, no? I think it would scare him if he woke up and found me standing there watching him.
Pickles: So that's a yes, then.
Me: I will be awake and available for any assistance he may require.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on April 11, 2012, 02:11:55 PM
"You could argue that money is more important for men.  I think a guy in their first job, maybe because they expect to be a breadwinner someday, may be a little more money-conscious. To attribute everything to a so-called bias in the workplace is just not true."
- Glenn Grothman (R-WI, state rep)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on April 11, 2012, 02:15:23 PM
:crankey:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on April 11, 2012, 02:17:40 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on April 11, 2012, 02:15:23 PM
:crankey:

WELCOME TO THE EARLY 21st CENTURY.  IT'S LIKE THE EARLY 20th CENTURY.  AND THE EARLY 18th CENTURY.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on April 11, 2012, 04:19:32 PM
I think I threw up a little in my brain.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on April 11, 2012, 05:18:26 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 11, 2012, 02:11:55 PM
"You could argue that money is more important for men.  I think a guy in their first job, maybe because they expect to be a breadwinner someday, may be a little more money-conscious. To attribute everything to a so-called bias in the workplace is just not true."
- Glenn Grothman (R-WI, state rep)
KAI! FIX YOUR DAMN POLITICIANS! IF YOU DON'T, I'LL HAVE THE DALEYS TAKE OVER YOUR STATE TOO!  :argh!:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on April 11, 2012, 05:36:23 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 11, 2012, 02:11:55 PM
"You could argue that money is more important for men.  I think a guy in their first job, maybe because they expect to be a breadwinner someday, may be a little more money-conscious. To attribute everything to a so-called bias in the workplace is just not true."
- Glenn Grothman (R-WI, state rep)

Don't call it a bias, it's a super power.
   \
:cuntpunch:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on April 11, 2012, 05:37:50 PM
When asked where he got his numbers (wage-wise) between men & women to disprove disparity, he replied "Ann Coulter".  No shit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on April 11, 2012, 05:38:26 PM
A clear case of the insane leading the blind.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 11, 2012, 05:42:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 11, 2012, 05:37:50 PM
When asked where he got his numbers (wage-wise) between men & women to disprove disparity, he replied "Ann Coulter".  No shit.

:facepalm:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 12, 2012, 01:26:50 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 11, 2012, 02:11:55 PM
"You could argue that money is more important for men.  I think a guy in their first job, maybe because they expect to be a breadwinner someday, may be a little more money-conscious. To attribute everything to a so-called bias in the workplace is just not true."
- Glenn Grothman (R-WI, state rep)

What. A. Total. Piece. Of. Shit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on April 12, 2012, 02:17:08 AM
Following an encounter with a man with an electrolarynx:

EoCGF:  That guy was a robot!

EoC:  That's fucked up.

EoCGF:  Yeah.  That guy was a cyborg!

EoC:  That's...okay, yeah that's actually much better.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on April 13, 2012, 09:19:54 PM
I bought a few cans of spray paint the other day and instead of bidding me farewell, the frumpy middle-aged white lady says, "Enjoy your freedom."

I couldn't tell how she meant it, like, enjoy your freedom to buy paint because you won't be able to if you get caught, you little bastard? Or was it a sympathetic, "go team, give 'em hell," comment? Or was she just saying that to everybody? I couldn't decide, so I just kind of squinted my eyes at her and left.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on April 13, 2012, 09:20:59 PM
Quote from: Net on April 13, 2012, 09:19:54 PM
I bought a few cans of spray paint the other day and instead of bidding me farewell, the frumpy middle-aged white lady says, "Enjoy your freedom."

That's full out wobbler time, that is.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on April 13, 2012, 09:38:54 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 13, 2012, 09:20:59 PM
Quote from: Net on April 13, 2012, 09:19:54 PM
I bought a few cans of spray paint the other day and instead of bidding me farewell, the frumpy middle-aged white lady says, "Enjoy your freedom."

That's full out wobbler time, that is.

From the nebulous way she said it I just couldn't tell. You're a better judge of people though, so you're probably right.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on April 14, 2012, 11:10:59 PM
"Absolutes are the atrophy of the frontal lobe" - dude I know from some other forum
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 15, 2012, 05:43:05 AM
Quote from: Net on April 13, 2012, 09:38:54 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 13, 2012, 09:20:59 PM
Quote from: Net on April 13, 2012, 09:19:54 PM
I bought a few cans of spray paint the other day and instead of bidding me farewell, the frumpy middle-aged white lady says, "Enjoy your freedom."

That's full out wobbler time, that is.

From the nebulous way she said it I just couldn't tell. You're a better judge of people though, so you're probably right.

He is the most best judge of people I have ever met.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 15, 2012, 05:43:26 AM
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on April 14, 2012, 11:10:59 PM
"Absolutes are the atrophy of the frontal lobe" - dude I know from some other forum

He speaks TRUTH.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on April 17, 2012, 07:18:03 PM
"WHAT FUCKING RAGE PROBLEM?"
- Me, at work, 10 minutes ago.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on April 23, 2012, 05:21:29 AM
Dok: :lulz:

I am generally honest to a fault. I have only learned recently to apply filter between my brain/mouth and the world around me. But when you give me an opening, well...
Today at work, I'm sitting in the breakroom with Dr. GF who came to visit and bring me food. She feeds me all the time. It's fantastic. Some other folks are in the break room as well, chit-chatting about what-have-you.

SkinnyK: "Naw man, you don't ever wanna tell yo woman she looks like she gained a couple pounds for ANY reason."

Annoying Toad: "Not me. I always prefer honesty. Everytime, for any reason, just give me the truth."

Alty: (http://www.lolforumpictures.com/orly/orly.gif)

Annoying Toad: "Yeah, RLY."

Alty: "OK. So you know when the store is closed and you're taking a long time with your customers, like you usually do, and you're finally all done 30 minutes after we've shut the gate, and the everything is in the bag and money has changed hands and you're walking toward the door?"

Annoying Toad:  :sad:

Alty: "When that happens, when you then pick up the customer's child to play with him and tell him how cute he is instead of getting them out of the door as quickly as you can so that we can all go home instead of making us all wait until you're finally done which we have to do no matter what, people are going to resent you."

Annoying Toad:  :x

Alty: "Oh, I'm sure you don't care if they resent you."

AT: *choked grunt in the affirmative*

Alty: "Well it doesn't really change the fact that they WILL resent you, which leads to a fairly hostile work environment like you've experienced."

AT: "I didn't even make you late."

Alty: "No, you didn't. But I'm not just talking about me."

AT: "I didn't make anyone else late either."

Alty: (http://www.lolforumpictures.com/orly/orly.gif)

AT: :showus:

Some time after closing there was much tear-filled shouting about rudeness and my trying to impress Dr. GF. Which, let me just say with all modesty, is stupid because she's super impressed already.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on April 23, 2012, 06:00:03 AM
Ran into high school friend at bar and his buddy.

High school friend: ...but i just dont usually worry about shit you know?

Me: i worry about shit all the time. Thats why i drink :smirk:

high school friends buddy: :D :cheers:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on May 05, 2012, 04:27:50 PM
"At least once every human being should have to run for his life, to teach him that milk does not come from the supermarket, that safety does not come from policemen, and that news is not something that happens to other people." - Robert A. Heinlein
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 05, 2012, 05:05:27 PM
Alty, next time Annoying Toad wears ugly pants (which I can tell she does) you should say "I wasn't going to say anything but you said you always prefer honesty, so, to be honest, those pants are horrible".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on May 06, 2012, 08:19:06 PM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on May 05, 2012, 04:27:50 PM
"At least once every human being should have to run for his life, to teach him that milk does not come from the supermarket, that safety does not come from policemen, and that news is not something that happens to other people." - Robert A. Heinlein
I should read more Heinlein.
Everybody should read more Heinlein!
THAT MEANS YOU! PERSON READING THIS POST!

Quote from: Nigel on May 05, 2012, 05:05:27 PM
Alty, next time Annoying Toad wears ugly pants (which I can tell she does) you should say "I wasn't going to say anything but you said you always prefer honesty, so, to be honest, those pants are horrible".
Just prefix every statement you make to Annoying Toad with "I wasn't going to say anything but you said you always prefer honesty, so, to be honest, "
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: hirley0 on May 06, 2012, 08:29:28 PM
11:29:?? ~"news is not so"~i believe it
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on May 06, 2012, 08:32:44 PM
Quote from: :regret: on May 06, 2012, 08:19:06 PM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on May 05, 2012, 04:27:50 PM
"At least once every human being should have to run for his life, to teach him that milk does not come from the supermarket, that safety does not come from policemen, and that news is not something that happens to other people." - Robert A. Heinlein
I should read more Heinlein.
Everybody should read more Heinlein!
THAT MEANS YOU! PERSON READING THIS POST!

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on May 06, 2012, 08:49:57 PM
To cure yourself of the desire to read Heinlein start with "Time Enough for Love".

As for Annoying Toad, she cried a good deal and no longer makes eye contact with me.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 06, 2012, 09:56:51 PM
Quote from: Alty on May 06, 2012, 08:49:57 PM
To cure yourself of the desire to read Heinlein start with "Time Enough for Love".

As for Annoying Toad, she cried a good deal and no longer makes eye contact with me.

FLAWLESS VICTORY!

And yeah, if that's the book I think it is, it made me sick a little. The part where the protagonist is "seduced" by a 13-year-old is seriously fucked up.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on May 06, 2012, 10:01:08 PM
Quote from: Nigel on May 06, 2012, 09:56:51 PM
Quote from: Alty on May 06, 2012, 08:49:57 PM
To cure yourself of the desire to read Heinlein start with "Time Enough for Love".

As for Annoying Toad, she cried a good deal and no longer makes eye contact with me.

FLAWLESS VICTORY!

And yeah, if that's the book I think it is, it made me sick a little. The part where the protagonist is "seduced" by a 13-year-old is seriously fucked up.

Jesus, I didn't even get that far. His perspective on gender and sex make me want to shove my own junk into a nuclear reactor.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 06, 2012, 10:03:46 PM
Quote from: Alty on May 06, 2012, 10:01:08 PM
Quote from: Nigel on May 06, 2012, 09:56:51 PM
Quote from: Alty on May 06, 2012, 08:49:57 PM
To cure yourself of the desire to read Heinlein start with "Time Enough for Love".

As for Annoying Toad, she cried a good deal and no longer makes eye contact with me.

FLAWLESS VICTORY!

And yeah, if that's the book I think it is, it made me sick a little. The part where the protagonist is "seduced" by a 13-year-old is seriously fucked up.

Jesus, I didn't even get that far. His perspective on gender and sex make me want to shove my own junk into a nuclear reactor.

It's guys like that who make women freaked out by men. They are convinced that all guys are just like them, and they're good at making it seem that way.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on May 06, 2012, 10:10:00 PM
Quote from: Nigel on May 06, 2012, 10:03:46 PM
Quote from: Alty on May 06, 2012, 10:01:08 PM
Quote from: Nigel on May 06, 2012, 09:56:51 PM
Quote from: Alty on May 06, 2012, 08:49:57 PM
To cure yourself of the desire to read Heinlein start with "Time Enough for Love".

As for Annoying Toad, she cried a good deal and no longer makes eye contact with me.

FLAWLESS VICTORY!

And yeah, if that's the book I think it is, it made me sick a little. The part where the protagonist is "seduced" by a 13-year-old is seriously fucked up.

Jesus, I didn't even get that far. His perspective on gender and sex make me want to shove my own junk into a nuclear reactor.

It's guys like that who make women freaked out by men. They are convinced that all guys are just like them, and they're good at making it seem that way.

Read Farnham's Freehold, some time.

Because in the post-apocalyptic future, BLACK MEN WANT OUR BLOND WOMEN!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on May 06, 2012, 10:11:45 PM
Also, The Fifth Column, in which Heinlein explains that there ARE some Asians that can be trusted, but not MANY.  You can tell the ones that can be trusted, because they have learned, after generations of being in America, to dress like decent White folks.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 06, 2012, 10:30:47 PM
Wow

I see I've been fortunate in not having read more than a few of his books.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on May 06, 2012, 10:49:38 PM
Quote from: Nigel on May 06, 2012, 10:30:47 PM
Wow

I see I've been fortunate in not having read more than a few of his books.

Funny thing is, most Science Fiction writers are conservative, which is a little counter-intuitive.  But relatively few of them are out-and-out screwballs like Robert Heinlein or Orson Scott Card.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on May 07, 2012, 01:44:22 AM
Richter: "It's a good thing we ate our food and left the truck stop.  I'm bushed enough that once the food set in I'd be a fixture there.  They wouldn't be able to move me either.  No, they're just throw a cowboy hat on me, apply a coat of varnish, and no one would even ASK."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on May 07, 2012, 09:48:26 PM
Well shit, now i have to read more Heinlein.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on May 12, 2012, 12:54:19 AM
Waiting in villagers car for load in.

Villager: can i have some more of your coffee?
Me: no
villager: shakes empty coffe cup
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on May 17, 2012, 03:50:07 AM
Richard the Duck: Mormonism, Scientology, and Christian Science - those are purely American contributions to religion.
Garbo: Oh my god. What the hell.
Richard the Duck: Yep.
Garbo: That says so much about us.
Richard the Duck: It makes me weep.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on May 17, 2012, 03:53:48 AM
Me: Safety never takes a vacation!
Dok Howl: Safety takes a vacation all the time! Industrial accidents never take a vacation. 
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: I_Kicked_Kennedy on May 17, 2012, 03:55:02 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on May 17, 2012, 03:50:07 AM
Richard the Duck: Mormonism, Scientology, and Christian Science - those are purely American contributions to religion.
Garbo: Oh my god. What the hell.
Richard the Duck: Yep.
Garbo: That says so much about us.
Richard the Duck: It makes me weep.

Church of the Subgenius and the Church of Satan?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on May 17, 2012, 04:02:13 AM
We were talking about big religions, although I don't think he knows about CotSG and I forgot about Satanism.

In any case, extra kooky religions seem to be what we do.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on May 17, 2012, 04:13:26 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on May 17, 2012, 04:02:13 AM
We were talking about big religions, although I don't think he knows about CotSG and I forgot about Satanism.

In any case, extra kooky religions seem to be what we do.

At least you can't blame us for Wicca.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on May 17, 2012, 05:49:19 AM
It sort of bothers me that WE are somehow not as seriously taken as Christian Scientists. And we have fewer numbers. Scientology I get because of Battlefield Earth, plus it's totally distanced from a lot of the crap in major religions. They get weird all on their own. It's kind of commendable. Mormonism I get because who doesn't want magic underpants and variety in wifely types? Christian Science if just fucking goofy.

You take an already fucked up, twisted, and contradictory religion and add extra magic. As if JAYSUS wasn't magical enough. That said, most Christian Scientists I've met are pretty mellow. And the Christian Science Monitor does some decent journalism, FWIW.

IT MAKES NO SENSE.

There must be a way to get a step ahead of those dicks. Maybe Discordia needs to start fucking people (and taking their money) over in an organized fashion. That seems to be what The People want.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 17, 2012, 10:00:42 PM
Maybe if we added special underpants to Discordianism, we could someday be as popular as Mormonism.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on May 17, 2012, 10:02:39 PM
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on May 17, 2012, 10:00:42 PM
Maybe if we added special underpants to Discordianism, we could someday be as popular as Mormonism.

I am wearing magical invisible underpants. I decree this to be a holy rite of discospagia.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 17, 2012, 10:05:18 PM
I don't care about being as popular as Mormonism.

Being as rich as Mormonism, on the other hand...I declare all Discordians must tithe 23% of their income, to me.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on May 17, 2012, 10:07:47 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 17, 2012, 10:05:18 PM
I don't care about being as popular as Mormonism.

Being as rich as Mormonism, on the other hand...I declare all Discordians must tithe 23% of their income, to me.

You want that in krugerrand, flax or pineal secretions?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on May 17, 2012, 11:24:53 PM
Quote from: The 3 wolf moon is a harsh SHUTUP on May 17, 2012, 10:07:47 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 17, 2012, 10:05:18 PM
I don't care about being as popular as Mormonism.

Being as rich as Mormonism, on the other hand...I declare all Discordians must tithe 23% of their income, to me.

You want that in krugerrand, flax or pineal secretions?

I'mma send mine in magickal invisible underpants.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on May 18, 2012, 09:36:46 PM
Garbo: I am *deeply* annoyed. JFC.
The Last Paladin: If I didn't know you better, I would swear that all that resentment you garner would give you ulcers. But knowing you, it'll probably build and build until you develop super powers. And then every one of those morons will rue the day they were born...
Garbo: :thanks: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 22, 2012, 06:41:43 PM
This is why I rarely talk to noobs

(18:06:58)<Cain>Writing yesterday's post on Romney and revanchism caused me to wonder why it is that hawkish Republicans often like to describe other states in obviously inaccurate ways. There is a propaganda value in doing so, and perhaps that's the only reason, but there is a danger that obviously inaccurate statements could invite ridicule and undermine the hawk's larger argument. There may be another important reason. There
(18:06:58)<Cain> is a hawkish desire to compare current international conditions with those in the past, so modern states that the hawks dislike are identified in terms that allows them to be more easily likened to hostile states from previous eras.
(18:07:06)<Cain><3 Daniel Larison
(18:07:30)<Cain>This may help to account for descriptions of Iran as an "expansionist" power, even though it hasn't pursued a genuinely expansionist foreign policy in decades. The historical comparison is explicit in the Traub article I linked: he likens the Iranian regime to the French revolutionary regime of the Directory. The only problem with the comparison is that the Directory was actively exporting revolution, creating
(18:07:30)<Cain> puppet regimes in occupied territories, and waging conventional wars beyond its borders, and Iran hasn't really been doing any of that.
(18:14:54)<Cram>sharp
(18:16:53)<Harkat>pew pew I'm an airplane
(18:17:16)<Cram>a TYPING airplane!
(18:17:30)<Harkat>oh god
(18:17:37)<Harkat>and replying Cram
(18:18:22)<Harkat>That was a lot of words that i read
(18:18:30)<Harkat>and i didn't understand any part of it
(18:18:34)<Cram>which was?
(18:18:52)<Harkat>that which Cain was talking about
(18:18:56)<Spah>x3
(18:19:53)<Harkat>no comprendo signore?
(18:20:45)<Cram>I'm confused, do you have a more specific question?
(18:20:54)<Harkat>no
(18:21:04)<Harkat>i'm spouting rubbish
(18:21:13)<Harkat>and am confused at your confusion
(18:21:44)<Cram>oh
(18:22:21)<Harkat>i saw a wall of text from Cain about 'hawks' and 'republicans', so i told you i didn't understand it (after telling you i'm an airplane)
(18:23:00)<Cram>thanks for the recap
(18:23:30)<Harkat>no problemo
(18:23:37)<Cain>Forget it, Harkat, you're out of your element
(18:23:52)<Harkat>about the hawks and republicans?
(18:24:31)<Harkat>i don't wish to understand it, not that i care
(18:24:38)<Harkat>because
(18:24:39)<Cain>No, Harkat, these men are nihilists, there's nothing to be afraid of.
(18:25:19)<Harkat>ok ^^
(18:25:25)<Spah>Hawk=Predatory. They lie to make their point and paint other nations in colorful stereotypes to avoid cause and effect and just say 'we good, dey bad. Buy war bounds.'
(18:26:07)<Harkat>aah
(18:26:59)<Harkat>you speak of governments in general?
(18:27:18)<Cain>You have got to buck up, man. You cannot drag this negative energy in to the chat room!
(18:27:35)<Harkat>woah
(18:27:45)<Harkat>i thought i dragged the 'awesome' energy into the room
(18:28:06)<Spah>Buck up? Like Buck Buck bakaw?
(18:28:26)<Harkat>Buck Rogers!
(18:28:38)<Spah>Bidi bidi bidi.
(18:28:48)<Harkat>lol
(18:28:59)<Harkat>I haven't seen Buck for a while now =\
(18:29:03)<Spah>I preferd Buckaroo Bonzai.
(18:29:16)<Cassowaries>so you admit to stealing the awesome energy from its rightful owners
(18:29:19)<Spah>If you're in the states check Hulu.
(18:29:28)<Spah>I think they still have the whole series.
(18:29:58)<Harkat>TBH, Cassowaries, I thought I was creating the 'awesome' energy and dispersing it into this chat room
(18:30:17)<Harkat>I'm watching Being Erica currently ^^
(18:30:18)<Cassowaries>CREATING energy
(18:30:23)<Cassowaries>do you not know SCIENCE boy
(18:30:37)<Harkat>fuck science?
(18:30:51)<Cain>Well, there isn't a literal connection, Harkat.
(18:30:58)<Cram>lousy pagans. IN THIS CHAT ROOM WE FOLLOW THE LAWS OF THERMODYNAMICS.
(18:31:07)<Cassowaries>^^^^^
(18:31:20)<Harkat>I believe in nothing!
(18:31:29)<Harkat>I think
(18:31:48)<Harkat>but ok, thermodynamics
(18:31:53)<Cain>So you have no frame of reference here, Harkat. You're like a child who wanders into the middle of a movie and wants to know...
(18:32:11)<Harkat>Yes
(18:32:52)<Harkat>Why anyone wants only one frame of reference is ... intriguing
(18:33:17)<Cain>Harkat, this is not 'Nam. This is SCIENCE. There are rules.
(18:33:42)<Harkat>ok
(18:33:52)<Harkat>I need to brush up on science
(18:34:00)<Spah>Here, have a science bible https://sites.google.com/site/scienceandmathguide/
(18:34:42)<Harkat>All I can think of is energy transformation, flowing from one form to another
(18:36:16)<Cain>Is this your homework, Harkat? Is this your homework?
(18:36:24)<Harkat>It is now
(18:36:42)<Harkat>I have too many tabs now =\
(18:37:43)<Harkat>anything in particular i should look at?
(18:38:09)<Cram>yeah, check out Walter from The Big Lebowski
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on May 22, 2012, 06:59:59 PM
What the...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on May 22, 2012, 07:00:33 PM
HOW ZANY OF THEM
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on May 22, 2012, 07:01:24 PM
I posit that posting something interesting and thoughtful in IRC is an excercise in existential dispair.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 22, 2012, 07:02:04 PM
He still doesn't seem to realise I was quoting Walter Sobchak the entire time.

He's now telling me about how Sumerians are responsible for America.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on May 22, 2012, 07:02:36 PM
:lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on May 22, 2012, 07:40:32 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 22, 2012, 07:02:04 PM
He still doesn't seem to realise I was quoting Walter Sobchak the entire time.

He's now telling me about how Sumerians are responsible for America.

Well yeah. It's the United States of Sumerica. Where everyone can get sum.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on May 23, 2012, 05:43:22 AM
Quote from: Twiddler Durden on May 22, 2012, 07:40:32 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 22, 2012, 07:02:04 PM
He still doesn't seem to realise I was quoting Walter Sobchak the entire time.

He's now telling me about how Sumerians are responsible for America.

Well yeah. It's the United States of Sumerica. Where everyone can get sum.

:spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 24, 2012, 11:40:38 PM
Quote(22:43:30)<Froggypance>What the hell?
(22:43:44)<Froggypance>Who'd want a phial Reagan's blood?
(22:47:13)<lgs>>:]
(22:47:15)<Froggypance>Is someone trying to clone Reagan... like in that film?
(22:47:23)<lgs>we can only hope
(22:47:30)<Froggypance>What was that film...
(22:47:41)<Froggypance>Oh yes. 'The Boys from Brazil'...
(22:48:06)<Froggypance>(Did I go too far? Bit too much?)
(22:49:34)- Queen_Gogira quit (Quit: http://www.mibbit.com ajax IRC Client)
(22:51:11)<lgs>never
(22:51:47)<Cain>I want ALL the phials of Reagan's blood
(22:52:37)<Froggypance>CAIN YOU CAN BLOODY... er... SODDING WELL USE INK LIKE THE REST OF US
(22:53:12)<Cain>then again, I also want to clone Reagan, have him birthed in Kenya, then have him raised by Communist parents and have a life of Marxist indoctrination
(22:53:20)<Cain>and then bring him to America
(22:53:43)<Cain>best
(22:53:45)<Cain>troll
(22:53:48)<Cain>EVER
(22:54:02)<lgs>:D
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on May 24, 2012, 11:50:53 PM
I would support that.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on May 25, 2012, 06:23:24 AM
 :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pope Pixie Pickle on May 26, 2012, 10:55:23 PM
Me to Payne last night- "this heat is dildoes, nah, its WORSE than dildoes, dildoes can be FUN"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on May 26, 2012, 11:09:47 PM
Quote from: Pixie on May 26, 2012, 10:55:23 PM
Me to Payne last night- "this heat is dildoes, nah, its WORSE than dildoes, dildoes can be FUN"

Next time, just tell him:

"Behind every great man is a woman with an enormous strap on."

Guys love hearing shit like that.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on May 29, 2012, 12:46:00 AM
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4lvdyUMq21qzxfy9o1_500.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on May 29, 2012, 04:55:23 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 22, 2012, 07:02:04 PM
He still doesn't seem to realise I was quoting Walter Sobchak the entire time.

He's now telling me about how Sumerians are responsible for America.

:mittens: !!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 29, 2012, 05:10:20 PM
I was especially proud of this line:

(18:33:17)<Cain>Harkat, this is not 'Nam. This is SCIENCE. There are rules.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on June 01, 2012, 03:56:55 PM
" Stay calm, Its her last day, and she has a family who will press charges."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on June 05, 2012, 06:30:49 AM
Dr. GF: "We're all sluts and we're all gonna die!"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 20, 2012, 02:09:02 AM
Via text
Twid's Aunt: Cook out at nans 2 sun all well
Twid: Whats the occasion? Are we celebrating st johns day?
Twid: Or as i like to call it antichristmas
TA: Ya nana wants to just see gr kids
Twid: Ok but it being antichristmas im going to borrow stuff without permission just like that ecuadorian guy anti-claus would.
TA: Do not mean to fk up anybody dont like ur att arp
Twid: I dont understand what you mean. Whats an att arp?
TA: Nana wants to see her grand kids just pass the message
Twid: Sure no problem. Ill bring the missus too if shes free.
TA: What is the prob i was thk we could hv a nice lunch if u dont to come ok no words said
Twid: Uh, there is no problem. Did I miss something?
Twid: Are you crossing texts with someone else?

No response yet. I'm guessing box wine.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on June 20, 2012, 03:04:45 AM
:lulz:


"I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and I believe in Bigfoot."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 20, 2012, 03:28:44 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on June 20, 2012, 03:04:45 AM
:lulz:


"I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and I believe in Bigfoot."

:lulz:

It can be argued that I am a Satanist, in the fact that I tend to be adversarial to Christianity. What sets me apart from other Satanists is that I do it humorously. I don't engage in blasphemy unless it's funny or I'm wasted and feel like bitching about something.

:lulz:

I also intend to celebrate Kiester, which is like Easter except that it's on the ass end of Easter- the Sunday after the first New Moon following the Autumnal Equinox.

Haven't figured out what it will entail yet, other than Skinny Tuesday followed by 40 days of Spent.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: 00.dusk on June 20, 2012, 03:32:28 AM
Quote from: Twiddlegeddon on June 20, 2012, 03:28:44 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on June 20, 2012, 03:04:45 AM
:lulz:


"I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and I believe in Bigfoot."

:lulz:

It can be argued that I am a Satanist, in the fact that I tend to be adversarial to Christianity. What sets me apart from other Satanists is that I do it humorously. I don't engage in blasphemy unless it's funny or I'm wasted and feel like bitching about something.

:lulz:

I also intend to celebrate Kiester, which is like Easter except that it's on the ass end of Easter- the Sunday after the first New Moon following the Autumnal Equinox.

Haven't figured out what it will entail yet, other than Skinny Tuesday followed by 40 days of Spent.

I don't think I could ever survive 40 days of Spent. I regret to inform you I will not join your religious activities, as interestingly exotic as they sound.






Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 20, 2012, 03:33:59 AM
Quote from: 00.dusk on June 20, 2012, 03:32:28 AM
Quote from: Twiddlegeddon on June 20, 2012, 03:28:44 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on June 20, 2012, 03:04:45 AM
:lulz:


"I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and I believe in Bigfoot."

:lulz:

It can be argued that I am a Satanist, in the fact that I tend to be adversarial to Christianity. What sets me apart from other Satanists is that I do it humorously. I don't engage in blasphemy unless it's funny or I'm wasted and feel like bitching about something.

:lulz:

I also intend to celebrate Kiester, which is like Easter except that it's on the ass end of Easter- the Sunday after the first New Moon following the Autumnal Equinox.

Haven't figured out what it will entail yet, other than Skinny Tuesday followed by 40 days of Spent.

I don't think I could ever survive 40 days of Spent. I regret to inform you I will not join your religious activities, as interestingly exotic as they sound.

40 days of vague excess does sound excessive, but I'll figure something out within my budget.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 20, 2012, 03:39:33 AM
What's even funnier about this, is that my Aunt thinks there's some sort of problem. I mean, people started calling me a weirdo when I was 6. I'm turning 31 in about a month. While Antichristmas, and my seeming allegiance to the Antichrist and his thieving tropical minions is a bit unexpected, you'd think that after all this time they'd go, "well, that's Kevin for you..."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 20, 2012, 04:01:04 AM
Also considering my name and avatar, and that this is the second time that it's been humorously relevant, it's time that I move on to the next name on Trip's list, as much as I will miss being Twiddlegeddon, the First Beast.

In honor of this passing, which will take place as soon as I pee, find the list, womp it up and hit update

A reading from the Book of Revelation:

Starting from 12:12

Rejoice then you spags, and those that womp with them! But woe to the cabbage and the Machine, for the devil sends the Twid with tasteless humor, because he knows his time is short, and he has to get a few more shots in before last call....

starting 13:16

Also it causes all, both small and great, both rich and poor, both free and slave, to be womped with their right hand or forehead, so that no one can post or backpedal who does not have the womp, that is the name of the Twid or the number of its name. This calls for wild speculation: let anyone with google search and a few screws loose calculate the number of the Twid, for it is the number of a spag. It's number is six hundred and sixty-six.

This particular translation has been a spoof of the Mulkerrins family Bible, which is in my possession as eldest and most interested in genealogy.

Now, some appropriate music with the same verses quoted from a more Anglican angle.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsmcDLDw9iw
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 22, 2012, 05:28:05 PM
Computer: warning! The following article is from the great soviet encyclopedia (1979). It might be outdated our ideologically biased.
Me: really, i just want to know what a phlegmon is so i can code this.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: EK WAFFLR on June 22, 2012, 06:04:42 PM
AFP: Neil! This is the guy who's hosting the Norwegian House Party!
NG: I know, darling. How many bearded Norwegians with banjoleles are there?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 22, 2012, 06:15:41 PM
:lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on June 24, 2012, 12:35:09 AM
If I didn't mishear completely, someone at the Dunderbeist (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunderbeist) gig I was at earlier today said "Is this Peter Gabriel?"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on June 25, 2012, 05:29:49 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on June 22, 2012, 06:04:42 PM
AFP: Neil! This is the guy who's hosting the Norwegian House Party!
NG: I know, darling. How many bearded Norwegians with banjoleles are there?

:lulz: :mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on June 25, 2012, 10:53:24 PM
A friend of mine is MSTing that awful fanfic-with-the-serial-numbers-filed-off Fifty Shades of Gray:

"Sorry girl, but if some scrub was all wanting to put his fist in my butthole, I'd be expecting some MAD skrilla out of the deal. I'm talking nice clothes, nice dinners, nice bling, maybe a nice car. You don't go fisting my butthole without paying for it, son."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on June 30, 2012, 12:57:03 AM
:lulz:
This shit killed me today.  Ever get one of those 'wrong number text messages?  This person texted me four times with the phrase, "Can u hangout today?" Here's what transpired...

Texter: Can u hangout today?
Texter: Can u hangout today?
Texter: Can u hangout today?
Texter: Can u hangout today?
Me: Who is this
Texter: Who is this?
Me: You texted me 5 times asking to hang out so u first
Texter: No I didnt, you must have the wrong number
Me: Just replying to your initial text...but no matter...im pretty busy this week anyway :P
Texter: I hav no idea who u r anyways
Me: Thats too bad...im pretty awesome
Texter: Then y dont u tell me who u r
Me: Cuz im the goddman batman
Texter: No I didnt, you must have the wrong number (this is a repeat...again...apparently this person has no idea how to cell phone)
Texter: Well to bad thats a lie who ever u r
Me: I wear a mask. And that mask, its not to hide who I am, but to create what I am.
Texter: Yur a weirdo
Me: Sometimes it's only madness that makes us what we are.
Texter: R u a dude?
Me: It's because of people like u that I become this. And you'll never give me a reason to become someone else.
Texter: Well just shut up dude
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Triple Zero on June 30, 2012, 01:18:17 AM
This is why we have to hack the mobile phone network and connect random numbers for texting.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 30, 2012, 01:34:52 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on June 30, 2012, 12:57:03 AM
:lulz:
This shit killed me today.  Ever get one of those 'wrong number text messages?  This person texted me four times with the phrase, "Can u hangout today?" Here's what transpired...

Texter: Can u hangout today?
Texter: Can u hangout today?
Texter: Can u hangout today?
Texter: Can u hangout today?
Me: Who is this
Texter: Who is this?
Me: You texted me 5 times asking to hang out so u first
Texter: No I didnt, you must have the wrong number
Me: Just replying to your initial text...but no matter...im pretty busy this week anyway :P
Texter: I hav no idea who u r anyways
Me: Thats too bad...im pretty awesome
Texter: Then y dont u tell me who u r
Me: Cuz im the goddman batman
Texter: No I didnt, you must have the wrong number (this is a repeat...again...apparently this person has no idea how to cell phone)
Texter: Well to bad thats a lie who ever u r
Me: I wear a mask. And that mask, its not to hide who I am, but to create what I am.
Texter: Yur a weirdo
Me: Sometimes it's only madness that makes us what we are.
Texter: R u a dude?
Me: It's because of people like u that I become this. And you'll never give me a reason to become someone else.
Texter: Well just shut up dude

This sort of thing actually happened to me with someone who (based on google's info on area code) was from Mexico. I kept the conversation up.

I ended up asking him what he does for fun. He said playing soccer. He asked me the same. I said playing guitar and drinking beer. He approved.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 01, 2012, 08:10:56 AM
EFO: "I am pretty sure that 90% of her personality is butts".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 01, 2012, 08:24:16 AM
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on July 01, 2012, 08:10:56 AM
EFO: "I am pretty sure that 90% of her personality is butts".

:lulz: :?:1fap:

I'm presuming her posterior posteriorated quite a bit, whoever she was? Or is she preoccupied with butts?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 01, 2012, 08:42:37 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 01, 2012, 08:24:16 AM
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on July 01, 2012, 08:10:56 AM
EFO: "I am pretty sure that 90% of her personality is butts".

:lulz: :?:1fap:

I'm presuming her posterior posteriorated quite a bit, whoever she was? Or is she preoccupied with butts?

I think the latter.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pope Pixie Pickle on July 02, 2012, 08:43:44 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on June 22, 2012, 06:04:42 PM
AFP: Neil! This is the guy who's hosting the Norwegian House Party!
NG: I know, darling. How many bearded Norwegians with banjoleles are there?

I AM SO FUCKING JEALOUS. If is possible can you get their autographs and post them to me? I will love you forever!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: EK WAFFLR on July 02, 2012, 11:01:23 AM
Quote from: Pixie on July 02, 2012, 08:43:44 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on June 22, 2012, 06:04:42 PM
AFP: Neil! This is the guy who's hosting the Norwegian House Party!
NG: I know, darling. How many bearded Norwegians with banjoleles are there?

I AM SO FUCKING JEALOUS. If is possible can you get their autographs and post them to me? I will love you forever!

Of course! Anything special you want autographed?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 02, 2012, 02:01:10 PM
Iggy Pop

QuoteQ: Has your relationship with your penis changed?

A: I would characterize it sort of like a powerful interest group within a political party at this point. It used to be the entire political party.

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/07/01/magazine/iggy-pop-isnt-ready-to-give-up-the-carnal-life.html?_r=1&smid=fb-share
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pope Pixie Pickle on July 02, 2012, 04:58:29 PM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on July 02, 2012, 11:01:23 AM
Quote from: Pixie on July 02, 2012, 08:43:44 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on June 22, 2012, 06:04:42 PM
AFP: Neil! This is the guy who's hosting the Norwegian House Party!
NG: I know, darling. How many bearded Norwegians with banjoleles are there?

I AM SO FUCKING JEALOUS. If is possible can you get their autographs and post them to me? I will love you forever!

Of course! Anything special you want autographed?

Just something sturdy I can have laminated or frame. Or something with either Death or Delirium on it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: EK WAFFLR on July 05, 2012, 02:45:57 AM
Quote from: Pixie on July 02, 2012, 04:58:29 PM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on July 02, 2012, 11:01:23 AM
Quote from: Pixie on July 02, 2012, 08:43:44 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on June 22, 2012, 06:04:42 PM
AFP: Neil! This is the guy who's hosting the Norwegian House Party!
NG: I know, darling. How many bearded Norwegians with banjoleles are there?

I AM SO FUCKING JEALOUS. If is possible can you get their autographs and post them to me? I will love you forever!

Of course! Anything special you want autographed?

Just something sturdy I can have laminated or frame. Or something with either Death or Delirium on it.

Not a problem at all.

Now for some gold from my band's american "Manager":

R: so what's the ideas for the new project?
Me: To Dance While the Sky Crashes Down. haha
R: to ride the 93rd current from the deep of dead r'yleh?
Me: Something like that yes. Just add glitter. :D
R: ...you made a surfboard out of Edward Cullen?!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on July 05, 2012, 05:27:12 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 05, 2012, 06:28:12 PM
Another round of "Texts with Richter"


Richter: Saw your calls from last night, what's up?

Me: Nothing serious. Had a drunk panic about keys and had to pee. I peed in a bush like a boss and Navyguy found my keys.

Richter: Wow, bummer. The bushes know who the baws is now, though.

Me: I feel all manly.

Richter: Your honorary man card and brass starter cajones will be in the mail.

Me: Thank you sir.


Last week:

Me: *sending Richter copious amounts of horrible ancient art and books relating to thus via picture message*

Richter: Ok, where is this temple of cool shit you have found? It's like the inside of my brain minus boobs.

Me: The MFA. [Museum of Fine Arts, Boston.]


Me: As my Holy Man, you need to stop the rain from coming.

Richter: All available Holy is going into keeping me from yarking until whatever pestilent bolus of black fuckery I ate has finally cleared my waffling colon.

Me: I'm assuming you're not coming to fencing practice tonight.






Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 07:49:33 PM
Your band has a manager?

:?

Lmno? Does yours?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: EK WAFFLR on July 05, 2012, 08:03:22 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 07:49:33 PM
Your band has a manager?

:?

Lmno? Does yours?

"Manager". He Helps with overseas promotion stuff.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on July 05, 2012, 08:05:13 PM
"This ingredient, used as a flavor enhancer in raspberry and other candies, is called castor or castoreum, and it's been used as a food additive for decades. It's made from the anal glands of beavers (http://mothering.com/jennifermargulis/kids-and-food/are-your-kids-eating-secretions-from-the-anal-glands-of-beavers) and considered non-toxic by the FDA for human consumption."

Mmm...."natural flavoring".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 05, 2012, 08:11:16 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 07:49:33 PM
Your band has a manager?

:?

Lmno? Does yours?

There's this guy, who got us a show once or twice.  We don't pay him, and he usually gets drunk and jumps up and down at our show. 

That's pretty much the extent of it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 08:18:51 PM
Overseas promotion? Jesus what are we doing wrong?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 08:19:40 PM
Also net thats fucking disgusting lol
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 05, 2012, 08:27:51 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 08:18:51 PM
Overseas promotion? Jesus what are we doing wrong?

Yeah, but remember that for him, "overseas" means "the next town over".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on July 05, 2012, 08:30:40 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 08:19:40 PM
Also net thats fucking disgusting lol

I see the last decade of my life through raspberry-tinted glasses.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 08:52:00 PM
:lulz: to both
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: EK WAFFLR on July 05, 2012, 09:51:51 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 08:18:51 PM
Overseas promotion? Jesus what are we doing wrong?

It sounds like more than it is. He basically raves about my music online and gets free stuff. I call him Manager just for fun, really.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 09:54:22 PM
Ok. I was getting concerned. You have connections up the wazz too so it was a reasonable assumption. I wouldnt be surprised if youre the only human darkthrone has contact with.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: EK WAFFLR on July 05, 2012, 10:05:12 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 09:54:22 PM
Ok. I was getting concerned. You have connections up the wazz too so it was a reasonable assumption. I wouldnt be surprised if youre the only human darkthrone has contact with.

Haha. I see Fenriz every now and then, but he isn't very talkative much of the time.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 05, 2012, 10:05:30 PM
Quote from: Net on July 05, 2012, 08:05:13 PM
"This ingredient, used as a flavor enhancer in raspberry and other candies, is called castor or castoreum, and it's been used as a food additive for decades. It's made from the anal glands of beavers (http://mothering.com/jennifermargulis/kids-and-food/are-your-kids-eating-secretions-from-the-anal-glands-of-beavers) and considered non-toxic by the FDA for human consumption."

Mmm...."natural flavoring".

The comments are what get me.

"This is disgusting. People need to pay attention to ingredients themselves now and ASK what the ingredients are, no DEMAND to know what the ingredients are, since the FDA no longer seems capable of doing that and protecting our children."

THE FDA WONT PROTECT OUR CHILDREN FROM BEAVER ANUS GLANDS.  THEY MIGHT BE DANGEROUS!  I BLAME OBAMA.

And yet most people will let their kids eat the horrific shit that comes from high street burger chains, which make beaver anuses look positively appetising.

Also, LOL, look who the author is http://daisymayfattypants.blogspot.cz/2008/08/perfect-mother-obviously.html and http://daisymayfattypants.blogspot.cz/2010/04/jennifer-margulis-poster-parent-for-me.html
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 10:53:20 PM
Of course you know fenriz one of the most private musicians in europe. Of course. Like i said im not surprised.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: EK WAFFLR on July 05, 2012, 11:14:12 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 05, 2012, 10:53:20 PM
Of course you know fenriz one of the most private musicians in europe. Of course. Like i said im not surprised.

I don't know him very well, but when you hang out in the same bars for over a decade, you start talking after a while.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Forsooth on July 05, 2012, 11:23:15 PM
I don't think I'll ever be able to nonchalantly consume low quality strawberry, raspberry, or vanilla
again without looking at the ingredients.

Not to say I won't eat beaver anus flavor again, I just want to know so I can spread the cheer around

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 06, 2012, 12:13:33 AM
I know waffle iron :lol:

i dont begrudge you for it its just funny that you had beers with a notorious recluse. The only famous person i had a conversation with was rob dickinson of catherine wheel and the only reason i was able to do so was that he was playing tt the bears for his solo project and my roommate was a die hard catherine wheel fan. I dont listen to catherine wheel (i did enjoy the show). He asked for requests and i shouted out number of the beast (hes bruce dickinsons cousin) and he said interesting... And then started playing the riff. When i went up to him after and he saw my maiden shirt he laughed. Then we talked like two regulr joes at a bar.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 07, 2012, 02:43:13 AM
While at work, texting Villager:

Me: Its bloody freezing in here.
Villager: Can you make it warmer?
Me:
(http://i196.photobucket.com/albums/aa66/dracolupus/theremostat.jpg)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 07, 2012, 02:49:52 AM
Quote from: Net on July 05, 2012, 08:05:13 PM
"This ingredient, used as a flavor enhancer in raspberry and other candies, is called castor or castoreum, and it's been used as a food additive for decades. It's made from the anal glands of beavers (http://mothering.com/jennifermargulis/kids-and-food/are-your-kids-eating-secretions-from-the-anal-glands-of-beavers) and considered non-toxic by the FDA for human consumption."

Mmm...."natural flavoring".

THAT IS AWESOME!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on July 07, 2012, 04:46:09 AM
:lulz:

reminds me of this:

http://www.cracked.com/article_15982_5-horrifying-food-additives-youve-probably-eaten-today.html
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on July 07, 2012, 05:37:55 AM
"Nigel isn't a cougar, she's a fucking saber-toothed tiger."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on July 07, 2012, 05:55:27 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on July 07, 2012, 04:46:09 AM
:lulz:

reminds me of this:

http://www.cracked.com/article_15982_5-horrifying-food-additives-youve-probably-eaten-today.html

WHERE IS THE ANAL GLANDS OF BEAVERS?!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on July 07, 2012, 06:04:36 AM
Quote from: Net on July 07, 2012, 05:55:27 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on July 07, 2012, 04:46:09 AM
:lulz:

reminds me of this:

http://www.cracked.com/article_15982_5-horrifying-food-additives-youve-probably-eaten-today.html

WHERE IS THE ANAL GLANDS OF BEAVERS?!

In the ol spare tire.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 07, 2012, 06:25:50 AM
Quote from: Net on July 07, 2012, 05:37:55 AM
"Nigel isn't a cougar, she's a fucking saber-toothed tiger."

Hahahaha, say what?!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 08, 2012, 10:03:05 PM
At my friend Bender's house for a barbecue yesterday...

Navyguy: *Opening beer bottles with a lighter, goes for the Guinness, knowing damn well whats about to happen...cap explodes off* "Going...going...and it's in the pool. Fuck."

Bender: What the fuck? You've been in my house for 5 fucking minutes and you put a cap in my pool? Oh my god, get scrotum AIDS! You have no idea what the fuck I had to go through to get that goddamn pool set up! Christ die in a fire! ...Nice shot, by the way.

Me: *cider comes out nose*
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on July 09, 2012, 11:48:45 PM
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on July 07, 2012, 06:25:50 AM
Quote from: Net on July 07, 2012, 05:37:55 AM
"Nigel isn't a cougar, she's a fucking saber-toothed tiger."

Hahahaha, say what?!

Someone you haven't met (who I'll refer to as Metal Hair) that nonetheless seems to be getting a fairly accurate idea of you.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on July 09, 2012, 11:50:00 PM
"What more is there to life than almost falling out of a tree while you're having an orgasm?"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 10, 2012, 04:09:55 AM
Navyguy: Your roommate makes a poor hippie.

Me: What makes you say that?

Navyguy: Aside from the way she just sat there and gossiped like a sorority girl and bitched about how her room was messy while smoking pot with her friends?

Me: True...true...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 10, 2012, 04:10:20 AM
Quote from: Net on July 09, 2012, 11:50:00 PM
"What more is there to life than almost falling out of a tree while you're having an orgasm?"

I like that one.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 10, 2012, 07:52:22 PM
Random messages of the day:

"I swear to god this chick who just came into work had actual boobs on her back. I mean, she wasn't just fat, she had like, legit D cups and they were in an underwire...Oh I should have gotten a pic."

"Be right back, we're gonna go fuck with the Coast Guard, because they pranked the base twice today and we just can't let that shit fly."

"I got in the tunic you made me, and busted a nut....well, not ON the tunic, that would make you probably kill me."

"I can vomit my nerdiness all over the house and you won't care. <3"

"So I found this book that's called, I shit you not, 'Praise Moves: The Christian Alternative to Yoga.' Here's a pic. Because I hate you."

(http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a356/theonlyang/praisemoves.jpg)

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on July 10, 2012, 07:53:42 PM
Quote from: Suu on July 10, 2012, 07:52:22 PM
Random messages of the day:

"I swear to god this chick who just came into work had actual boobs on her back. I mean, she wasn't just fat, she had like, legit D cups and they were in an underwire...Oh I should have gotten a pic."

"Be right back, we're gonna go fuck with the Coast Guard, because they pranked the base twice today and we just can't let that shit fly."

"I got in the tunic you made me, and busted a nut....well, not ON the tunic, that would make you probably kill me."

"I can vomit my nerdiness all over the house and you won't care. <3"

"So I found this book that's called, I shit you not, 'Praise Moves: The Christian Alternative to Yoga.' Here's a pic. Because I hate you."

(http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a356/theonlyang/praisemoves.jpg)



This literally hurts my brain. With actual, physical pain.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 10, 2012, 07:59:15 PM
My phone and Facebook are a treasure trove of asinine. The Praise Moves nearly made me shit myself laughing while I was in Walgreens.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: wlfjstr on July 10, 2012, 08:27:02 PM
Occam's Razor cuts out all the good bits - wlfjstr
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 11, 2012, 03:49:39 AM
Quote from: Suu on July 10, 2012, 07:52:22 PM


(http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a356/theonlyang/praisemoves.jpg)

Quote from: Your comment is awaiting moderationBless you, and thank you.

However, have you considered that I Corinthians, regarding things left for idols, have you considered that the angels told people to stop eating anything left at the idols (it was frequently meat–that was the done thing, even in pagan religions of the time, but it was often simply edibles for their gods) because it would make them sick, and the angels couldn't go more in depth in the "why" because people had no frame of reference for the reason (diseases, germs, and so on)?

I mean, I Corinthians 8:1, 9-10 seems to be saying just that. "I know that you might know how to make this food edible, but some other guy (who is likely starving) is going to see you eat that and not know how you made it edible, and he's going to get sick and die from it, and you would feel bad. So I think that everyone should just stop eating things left at the idols, okay? Thanks."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 11, 2012, 03:54:49 AM
:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 11, 2012, 04:35:17 AM
Bob's comment at the bottom (this is a specific link to it) and responses.

Guess which one I am:

http://news.yahoo.com/asteroid-named-gay-rights-pioneer-frank-kameny-171708427.html?bcmt=1341970360560-31dd2df1-4b0f-474d-953b-5e737ff727cb&bcmt_s=u
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on July 11, 2012, 06:01:19 AM
Quote from: Suu on July 10, 2012, 07:52:22 PM
Random messages of the day:

"I swear to god this chick who just came into work had actual boobs on her back. I mean, she wasn't just fat, she had like, legit D cups and they were in an underwire...Oh I should have gotten a pic."

"Be right back, we're gonna go fuck with the Coast Guard, because they pranked the base twice today and we just can't let that shit fly."

"I got in the tunic you made me, and busted a nut....well, not ON the tunic, that would make you probably kill me."

"I can vomit my nerdiness all over the house and you won't care. <3"

"So I found this book that's called, I shit you not, 'Praise Moves: The Christian Alternative to Yoga.' Here's a pic. Because I hate you."

(http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a356/theonlyang/praisemoves.jpg)

"Author of "Basic Steps To Godly Fitness"?  :lulz:

As opposed to what? "Ungodly fitness"?

Now I want to be "ungodly fit". Just to see what it's like.  :p
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 13, 2012, 02:22:11 AM
Facebook friend of a friend: I KNOW THERE IS NO GOD BECAUSE I AM DIABETIC. IF GOD WAS REAL THERE WOULDN'T BE ANY SUFFERING IN THIS WORLD AND I WOULDN'T BE SICK SO I AM AN ATHEIST.

Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvubyoR2XnQ

Edited for response: Damnholymotherfuckingassholeofafuck. That guy made me almost throw my phone at the wall. Fucking dickwad. You want to see a diabetic, asshole? Comma intended. Fuck with me. You'll lose. Dead. Ugh. Ugh. UGH!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on July 13, 2012, 07:30:16 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 13, 2012, 09:54:03 AM
My admittedly biased thoughts on a stupid argument, on Yahoo News regarding Germany. It's not showing up on my profile so, screenshot:

(http://i196.photobucket.com/albums/aa66/dracolupus/circumcision.jpg)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 17, 2012, 03:03:57 AM
Quote from: Net on July 09, 2012, 11:48:45 PM
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on July 07, 2012, 06:25:50 AM
Quote from: Net on July 07, 2012, 05:37:55 AM
"Nigel isn't a cougar, she's a fucking saber-toothed tiger."

Hahahaha, say what?!

Someone you haven't met (who I'll refer to as Metal Hair) that nonetheless seems to be getting a fairly accurate idea of you.

:lulz: Awesome!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on July 17, 2012, 08:26:49 AM
Quote from: Suu on July 13, 2012, 02:22:11 AM
Facebook friend of a friend: I KNOW THERE IS NO GOD BECAUSE I AM DIABETIC. IF GOD WAS REAL THERE WOULDN'T BE ANY SUFFERING IN THIS WORLD AND I WOULDN'T BE SICK SO I AM AN ATHEIST.

Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvubyoR2XnQ

Edited for response: Damnholymotherfuckingassholeofafuck. That guy made me almost throw my phone at the wall. Fucking dickwad. You want to see a diabetic, asshole? Comma intended. Fuck with me. You'll lose. Dead. Ugh. Ugh. UGH!!!!!!!!!

That video got a fuckload of similar comments since I saw it last, too.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 17, 2012, 06:43:53 PM
There is nothing better to throw at angry diabetics. Ever.

Seriously? "There is no god because I have to inject my pasty faced ass with insulin to support my sugar habit!" Bullshit. God made you diabetic because you suck.

END DIABETICS!

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 03:05:58 AM
After conversing with Carmen (landlady) and Jonas (guy in next room) (They are both Brazilian, but Carmen lived in Switzerland) who have been conversing extensively in not a language I can make out.

Twid: Je pense que je dois apprender Portugese et non Francais (I think that I ought to learn Portuguese and not French [with you is understood in context, since she agreed to help me brush up the other day])
Carmen: Ah, Oui, d'accord (Ah yes ok) [in English] Yes, in this house Portuguese might be more useful.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 03:24:33 AM
Now, if I could only find someone "ag caint as Gaeilge liom, beidh me go maith" (speaking in Irish with me, I will be good [literal: talking (ag caint) in the Irish Language (as Gaeilge) with me (liom), will I (beidh me) good (go maith)]
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on July 18, 2012, 04:14:24 AM
Ah caint lern all that.  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 04:31:57 AM
Quote from: TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS on July 18, 2012, 04:14:24 AM
Ah caint lern all that.  :lol:

No shit.

I will give that to Catholic Popes, is that they all have to be linguistic phenoms.

I'll drop the opportunity to speak with a fluent French speaker if said French speaker can make it easier for me to communicate with every Brazilian in this place (i.e.- everyone who isn't Twid)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 18, 2012, 04:36:12 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 03:05:58 AM
After conversing with Carmen (landlady) and Jonas (guy in next room) (They are both Brazilian, but Carmen lived in Switzerland) who have been conversing extensively in not a language I can make out.

Twid: Je pense que je dois apprender Portugese et non Francais (I think that I ought to learn Portuguese and not French [with you is understood in context, since she agreed to help me brush up the other day])
Carmen: Ah, Oui, d'accord (Ah yes ok) [in English] Yes, in this house Portuguese might be more useful.

Portagee sounds like French with a head cold and Spanish verbs.

Suu
-Boozj boozj Heyzoozj...You comma from Fall Reev or the Noozj Bedsford?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 04:48:19 AM
Quote from: Suu on July 18, 2012, 04:36:12 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 03:05:58 AM
After conversing with Carmen (landlady) and Jonas (guy in next room) (They are both Brazilian, but Carmen lived in Switzerland) who have been conversing extensively in not a language I can make out.

Twid: Je pense que je dois apprender Portugese et non Francais (I think that I ought to learn Portuguese and not French [with you is understood in context, since she agreed to help me brush up the other day])
Carmen: Ah, Oui, d'accord (Ah yes ok) [in English] Yes, in this house Portuguese might be more useful.

Portagee sounds like French with a head cold and Spanish verbs.

Suu
-Boozj boozj Heyzoozj...You comma from Fall Reev or the Noozj Bedsford?

Jonas and Carmen were trying to teach me a lot of stuff that sounded like clearing my throat. Sure, I get that with Irish CH and GH (GH is like... I dunno, either French R or regular Y depending on vowels. [dha phunt (two pounds Irish currency, pronounced, gargle-aw foont) vs mo gheansai (gh and dh are phonetically identical) which equals "moh yantsee", which means, my pull over sweater)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 04:50:05 AM
But, this shit sounds like more bastard Latin than French does.

Jonas said good luck and it was something like bao sorte, I think. Probably with this nonsense ~ over the a.

How the hell do you get that out of "Bona Fortuna"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on July 18, 2012, 04:57:58 AM
All those Europeans should have just kept Latin instead of confusing the whole thing.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 05:07:58 AM
Quote from: v3x on July 18, 2012, 04:57:58 AM
All those Europeans should have just kept Latin instead of confusing the whole thing.

Fuck you.

Ermm... on grounds of somewhat overlapping musical preferences....

YOU'RE FROM ARIZONA. FUCK THE DIAMOND BACKS.

I GOT NOTHING OTHER THAN YOUR MOPPY GOTH HAIR.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on July 18, 2012, 05:10:45 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 05:07:58 AM
Quote from: v3x on July 18, 2012, 04:57:58 AM
All those Europeans should have just kept Latin instead of confusing the whole thing.

Fuck you.

Ermm... on grounds of somewhat overlapping musical preferences....

YOU'RE FROM ARIZONA. FUCK THE DIAMOND BACKS.

I GOT NOTHING OTHER THAN YOUR MOPPY GOTH HAIR.

1. I don't watch football.

2. It's short now due to balding in the rear quadrant.

3. Latin is romantic in a way that French never will be. Burning heretics while reciting French poetry just doesn't click.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 05:10:59 AM
Truth be told though, I would rather learn 20 languages ok than speak one fluently.

What ever happened to the renaissance man?

I mean, I should have a couple of throw away slots for pet projects like the moribund Irish language. (It's going to die. Might as well call it now.)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 05:20:48 AM
Quote from: v3x on July 18, 2012, 05:10:45 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 05:07:58 AM
Quote from: v3x on July 18, 2012, 04:57:58 AM
All those Europeans should have just kept Latin instead of confusing the whole thing.

Fuck you.

Ermm... on grounds of somewhat overlapping musical preferences....

YOU'RE FROM ARIZONA. FUCK THE DIAMOND BACKS.

I GOT NOTHING OTHER THAN YOUR MOPPY GOTH HAIR.

1. I don't watch football.

2. It's short now due to balding in the rear quadrant.

3. Latin is romantic in a way that French never will be. Burning heretics while reciting French poetry just doesn't click.

1) Which football are you talking about? Oh god, I hope it's ours. Our football IS BORING AS FUCK BUT ONLY SLIGHTLY LESS BORING THAN EUROFOOTBALL. SERIOUSLY. I'LL KILL A MOTHERFUCKER OVER THIS BORING SHIT. AND I'M A BASEBALL FAN. PERSPECTIVE.

2) I THINK YOU GOT MIXED UP ABOUT MY ITEMS. NEVERTHELESS. SHAVE IT.

ONE OF TWID ONE OF TWID ONE OF TWID
I am a trendsetter Vex.
ONE OF TWID ONE OF TWID ONE OF TWID
I AM James Earl Jones in both those movies. Choose. Choose my son.
BOSTON RULES BOSTON RULES
You're suddenly not thirsty, are you? Give in to the unlimited water.
IA IA TWIDTHULHU FTAGN!

Never mind that now, never mind that.

Hey. Boston is totally awesome.

No teabaggers, plenty of water, you can get drunk whenever and say "hey I'm Irish."

joinusjoinusjoinusjoinusjoinus........................................
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 06:44:19 AM
Ok, I think I got lost.

I'm going to say fuck you Vex for doing so. I base this on nothing.

But I'm going to inflate my air mattress and drink more cold milk.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on July 18, 2012, 06:55:38 AM
Quote from: v3x on July 18, 2012, 05:10:45 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 05:07:58 AM
Quote from: v3x on July 18, 2012, 04:57:58 AM
All those Europeans should have just kept Latin instead of confusing the whole thing.

Fuck you.

Ermm... on grounds of somewhat overlapping musical preferences....

YOU'RE FROM ARIZONA. FUCK THE DIAMOND BACKS.

I GOT NOTHING OTHER THAN YOUR MOPPY GOTH HAIR.

1. I don't watch football.

2. It's short now due to balding in the rear quadrant.

3. Latin is romantic in a way that French never will be. Burning heretics while reciting French poetry just doesn't click.

Put this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HE_kMqeBHbc) on and burn heretics.  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 18, 2012, 03:25:17 PM
Quote from: v3x on July 18, 2012, 04:57:58 AM
All those Europeans should have just kept Latin instead of confusing the whole thing.

It wouldn't have been possible. Latin fazed out faster than you think and was being absorbed into the local vernacular by the time the empire controlled most of the continent and the legions were speaking Greek.

The $600,000 question is....why aren't we still speaking Greek?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 18, 2012, 03:31:24 PM
I blame sixth-century hipsters, who were too cool for "ο άνθρωπος" language.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 18, 2012, 03:47:00 PM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:17:35 AM
Quote from: ClientIt's not a priority priority. But it's still a priority.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 19, 2012, 03:23:15 AM
Quote from: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:17:35 AM
Quote from: ClientIt's not a priority priority. But it's still a priority.

Just where the fuck have YOU been?

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:28:50 AM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on July 19, 2012, 03:23:15 AM
Quote from: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:17:35 AM
Quote from: ClientIt's not a priority priority. But it's still a priority.

Just where the fuck have YOU been?
...Frozen in a block of ice?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 19, 2012, 03:31:26 AM
Quote from: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:28:50 AM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on July 19, 2012, 03:23:15 AM
Quote from: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:17:35 AM
Quote from: ClientIt's not a priority priority. But it's still a priority.

Just where the fuck have YOU been?
...Frozen in a block of ice?

Not an excuse.  We haven't had a game of werewolf since you left, and there are literally THOUSANDS of pics your sister hasn't bombed.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

Also, I need a current address.  I've been saving a Holy Relicâ„¢ for you.

Um.

Are the Canadian postal inspectors still a bunch of humorless churls?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on July 19, 2012, 03:49:22 AM
Payne and Remi returning on the same day?

I am deeply suspicious.  But I'll take it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 19, 2012, 04:03:50 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on July 19, 2012, 03:49:22 AM
Payne and Remi returning on the same day?

I am deeply suspicious.  But I'll take it.

Mourning Star, too.

I smell a plot.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Remington on July 19, 2012, 05:59:42 AM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on July 19, 2012, 03:31:26 AM
Quote from: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:28:50 AM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on July 19, 2012, 03:23:15 AM
Quote from: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:17:35 AM
Quote from: ClientIt's not a priority priority. But it's still a priority.

Just where the fuck have YOU been?
...Frozen in a block of ice?

Not an excuse.  We haven't had a game of werewolf since you left, and there are literally THOUSANDS of pics your sister hasn't bombed.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

Also, I need a current address.  I've been saving a Holy Relicâ„¢ for you.

Um.

Are the Canadian postal inspectors still a bunch of humorless churls?

Will send address by PM. Are you still at the same address yourself? I have some Philosfickal Rantings that never got sent, if only I can find them.

The Canada-US temporal mail anomaly is still in effect, so any messages sent should still take 3-4 weeks to be delivered.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Remington on July 19, 2012, 06:02:44 AM
Hah! Found them on an old fileserver. I will have them reprinted and sent, for Holy Contemplation.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 19, 2012, 01:03:11 PM
If there's anything better than new blood, it's old blood.


Welcome to all y'all.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Remington on July 20, 2012, 12:06:02 AM
I just closed a trouble ticket in the best way possible: by outlasting the person that filed it.

"Mr. Smith" had filed a ticket for a minor email issue about a month ago, yet never actually had time to troubleshoot the issue with me, or even remote me in so I could fix it. I just received notice today that Mr. Smith had been terminated, effective immediately.

Ticket Status
    |
     \-->Closed
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on July 20, 2012, 12:19:11 AM
"It's like a Fox News ticker at an evangelical rave trying to finger your throat while it calls you names."

Read more: 6 Websites That Misunderstand Their Audience (Hilariously) | Cracked.com http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-websites-that-misunderstand-their-audience-hilariously/#ixzz2176JGcvS
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 20, 2012, 03:40:40 AM
REMY!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 20, 2012, 01:03:01 PM
Quote from: Remington on July 20, 2012, 12:06:02 AM
I just closed a trouble ticket in the best way possible: by outlasting the person that filed it.

"Mr. Smith" had filed a ticket for a minor email issue about a month ago, yet never actually had time to troubleshoot the issue with me, or even remote me in so I could fix it. I just received notice today that Mr. Smith had been terminated, effective immediately.

Ticket Status
    |
     \-->Closed

I wonder if his tech question was 'how do I get the porn sites I subscribed to at work to stop emailing me?'
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 20, 2012, 05:29:38 PM
http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/ticket/obama-campaign-pulls-attack-ads-colorado-shooting-143519753.html?bcmt=1342799087607-bb028f6c-ba9e-4931-9346-521f8412100f&bcmt_s=u#ugccmt-container-b
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 20, 2012, 05:44:52 PM
I need to make this bit into a T-shirt:

Quote from: Twid in the role of ActualCAN'T HEAR ANY OF YOU OVER THE SOUND OF SHUT UP AND EYE OF THE TIGER!!!

"It's the... eye of the SHUT UP it's the thrill of the fight/rising up to the challenge of our SHUT UP/And the last known sane man runs the streets of Boston at night/And he's shouting us all with the eyyyyyyyyyyyye of the SHUT UP"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 21, 2012, 12:42:55 AM
http://news.yahoo.com/u-whooping-cough-outbreak-could-worst-half-century-051355523.html?bcmt=1342803136446-b601ec3a-9ced-4712-8891-8cba1f24cc8e&bcmt_s=u#ugccmt-container-b

I am having far too much fun with this.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 21, 2012, 07:13:45 AM
Apparently I'm an independent and I'm the problem:

http://news.yahoo.com/vt-gop-official-sorry-obama-facebook-post-232410255.html?bcmt=1342650433487-84c63fc2-658f-49c7-9263-10d1a73d657f&bcmt_s=u#ugccmt-container-b
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on July 21, 2012, 01:08:46 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 03:24:33 AM
Now, if I could only find someone "ag caint as Gaeilge liom, beidh me go maith" (speaking in Irish with me, I will be good [literal: talking (ag caint) in the Irish Language (as Gaeilge) with me (liom), will I (beidh me) good (go maith)]

Wait, in Irish 'be good' is 'go mad'?
That explains a few things.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 21, 2012, 02:38:29 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 20, 2012, 05:29:38 PM
http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/ticket/obama-campaign-pulls-attack-ads-colorado-shooting-143519753.html?bcmt=1342799087607-bb028f6c-ba9e-4931-9346-521f8412100f&bcmt_s=u#ugccmt-container-b

You think it'll change anything?

Naw, neither do I.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 21, 2012, 02:39:04 PM
QJ sez:

Quoteit was pretty much all frosted, I had to really spread it around (and mix it with the meat) to keep it from being disgusting. Had to go to therapy with the wife so ended up eating super late so I was really hungry and not into making something more tasty.

For tasty... there are pork rinds later :D

:horrormirth:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 21, 2012, 02:42:02 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 21, 2012, 07:13:45 AM
Apparently I'm an independent and I'm the problem:

http://news.yahoo.com/vt-gop-official-sorry-obama-facebook-post-232410255.html?bcmt=1342650433487-84c63fc2-658f-49c7-9263-10d1a73d657f&bcmt_s=u#ugccmt-container-b

AHAHAHAHAHAHA WAIT WHAT

Since when is Rob into politics? I played D&D with that guy. He introduced me to honey vanilla ice cream. Unless it's a different Rob Towle from Rutland Vt, which seems... unlikely.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 21, 2012, 02:42:26 PM
My sister even warned me about him.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 21, 2012, 07:50:40 PM
Quote from: :regret: on July 21, 2012, 01:08:46 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 18, 2012, 03:24:33 AM
Now, if I could only find someone "ag caint as Gaeilge liom, beidh me go maith" (speaking in Irish with me, I will be good [literal: talking (ag caint) in the Irish Language (as Gaeilge) with me (liom), will I (beidh me) good (go maith)]

Wait, in Irish 'be good' is 'go mad'?
That explains a few things.

Yep.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on July 23, 2012, 02:18:50 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 20, 2012, 05:44:52 PM
I need to make this bit into a T-shirt:

Quote from: Twid in the role of ActualCAN'T HEAR ANY OF YOU OVER THE SOUND OF SHUT UP AND EYE OF THE TIGER!!!

"It's the... eye of the SHUT UP it's the thrill of the fight/rising up to the challenge of our SHUT UP/And the last known sane man runs the streets of Boston at night/And he's shouting us all with the eyyyyyyyyyyyye of the SHUT UP"

:lulz:

Yes you do.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Remington on July 23, 2012, 05:20:24 AM
Learned something important today about tech work.

If the phone rings on the weekend, and you're not on call, don't fucking answer it. Otherwise you end up trying to troubleshoot networking/wiring problems for a remote site with a guy that has a heavy Indian accent. For 4 hours.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 23, 2012, 05:49:55 AM
Quote from: Net on July 23, 2012, 02:18:50 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 20, 2012, 05:44:52 PM
I need to make this bit into a T-shirt:

Quote from: Twid in the role of ActualCAN'T HEAR ANY OF YOU OVER THE SOUND OF SHUT UP AND EYE OF THE TIGER!!!

"It's the... eye of the SHUT UP it's the thrill of the fight/rising up to the challenge of our SHUT UP/And the last known sane man runs the streets of Boston at night/And he's shouting us all with the eyyyyyyyyyyyye of the SHUT UP"

:lulz:

Yes you do.

I'm glad that "gone nuts from other people's stupid" is marketable. I think I should start up a line of athletic wear.

Feel like the world needs to SHUT UP?
Go for a jog. Tell EVERYONE to SHUT UP.
Shout it out loud and proud, and in case they are deaf
And are in desperate need of SHUT UP in sign language
Wear your SHUT UP tanker top and jogging trunks.

Now mind you, you have to EARN THE SHUT UP (here's where BOB comes in).

You can't just be any old bloke who can wear shut up. Otherwise you're a stupid white dude wearing FUBU either making black dudes very angry or very amused. Also, please see SHUT UP if you're a white dude wearing FUBU. Also consider losing weight in that circumstance.

To earn the right to wear SHUT UP you need to pass the test. You're going to fail it most likely. You think you don't need SHUT UP but you do. If you fail the test, consider why you need the SHUT UP. No. We will not tell you why. Part of the SHUT UP is SELF EXPLORATION  SHUT UP. Figure out why you need to SHUT UP. Once you figured that out, test it. Say something with your new perspective. If even retards can't say retarded shit about it, chances are you SHOULD NOT SHUT UP BUT PREACH INSTEAD. They're still going to get you down. But just make sure your SHUT UP is better than theirs. And their SHUT UP is pretty fucking lame anyway, so just figure out the best way to say SHUT UP and make them ACTUALLY SHUT UP.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 23, 2012, 02:16:46 PM
Who's BOB? 

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: goupixg6 on July 23, 2012, 02:32:51 PM
oh yes selling panties with SD manga beatles faces on it
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 23, 2012, 03:40:39 PM
Krugman, on Objectivists:

"By the way, who built the roads in Galt's Gulch?"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 23, 2012, 03:46:40 PM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on July 23, 2012, 02:16:46 PM
Who's BOB?

He's the bloke with the pipe, no?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 23, 2012, 03:47:08 PM
You mean, "Bob"?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on July 23, 2012, 03:52:38 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 23, 2012, 05:49:55 AM
tanker top

Is that some Bostonese I've et to encounter?

We just say "tank top", unless we hate the person wearing it, then it's a "wife beater". I remember people up there saying "muscle shirt".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 23, 2012, 03:53:47 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 23, 2012, 03:47:08 PM
You mean, "Bob"?

Ah, quotes, not capitalization. Gotcha.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 23, 2012, 03:54:28 PM
Quote from: TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS on July 23, 2012, 03:52:38 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 23, 2012, 05:49:55 AM
tanker top

Is that some Bostonese I've et to encounter?

We just say "tank top", unless we hate the person wearing it, then it's a "wife beater". I remember people up there saying "muscle shirt".

Fingers doing more thinking than I'm allowing. It happens from time to time.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: EK WAFFLR on July 23, 2012, 04:21:37 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 23, 2012, 03:53:47 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 23, 2012, 03:47:08 PM
You mean, "Bob"?

Ah, quotes, not capitalization. Gotcha.

BOB is the bad guy in Twin Peaks.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 23, 2012, 04:47:48 PM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 23, 2012, 03:53:47 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 23, 2012, 03:47:08 PM
You mean, "Bob"?

Ah, quotes, not capitalization. Gotcha.

Any Bob you can actually spell or pronounce isn't worth talking about.  Hence the quotes.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 24, 2012, 03:10:33 AM
A calmer, gentler, SHUT UP in the comments:

http://news.yahoo.com/second-person-interest-interviewed-aurora-142934285.html?bcmt=1343056046998-9d6aa5ef-14cb-48ce-ab3a-9b13f18169a2&bcmt_s=u#ugccmt-container-b
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 24, 2012, 03:55:40 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on July 24, 2012, 03:10:33 AM
A calmer, gentler, SHUT UP in the comments:

http://news.yahoo.com/second-person-interest-interviewed-aurora-142934285.html?bcmt=1343056046998-9d6aa5ef-14cb-48ce-ab3a-9b13f18169a2&bcmt_s=u#ugccmt-container-b

Just got a quote from "Doctor" in Tucson, Arizona:
"Jesus, that was inane."

Is that you RP?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on July 30, 2012, 03:42:26 PM
At breakfast at summer camp yesterday, we ran out of coffee, so in anger a handful of people  spontaneously started an Occupy The Kitchen movement and shouted "Whose coffee? Our coffee!" and other slogans. When a new batch of coffee finally arrived, slight chaos broke out as everyone tried to get the coffee at the same time, and then someone exclaimed "this is the problem with fucking hippie movements like this!"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 30, 2012, 04:19:37 PM
Quote from: Lenin/McCarthy on July 30, 2012, 03:42:26 PM
At breakfast at summer camp yesterday, we ran out of coffee, so in anger a handful of people  spontaneously started an Occupy The Kitchen movement and shouted "Whose coffee? Our coffee!" and other slogans. When a new batch of coffee finally arrived, slight chaos broke out as everyone tried to get the coffee at the same time, and then someone exclaimed "this is the problem with fucking hippie movements like this!"

Someone is right.

Running out of coffee?  The horror.  Render unto Caesar, meaning "me".  My life is a tragic series of injustices, when The Man does not provide my coffee.  It highlights the inherent criminal nature of the system.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: standvast on August 02, 2012, 05:13:37 PM
"Put it in your mouth" ~ Akinyele.

could refer to a rain bow colored sock, medium rare kangaroo steak, or even a huge penis,.. who really knows ?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on August 02, 2012, 06:38:19 PM
Quote from: standvast on August 02, 2012, 05:13:37 PM
"Put it in your mouth" ~ Akinyele.

could refer to a rain bow colored sock, medium rare kangaroo steak, or even a huge penis,.. who really knows ?

As I was reading your joke, I was thinking, "He needs to add a reference to a really huge penis, because that would totally not be obvious."  But then I reached the end, and saw that you beat me to it.

Splendid.  Well done.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 02, 2012, 06:53:38 PM
It's not often that the snarky rejoinder is funnier than the original joke; but you, sir, have accomplished such a feat.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on August 02, 2012, 08:26:08 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 02, 2012, 06:53:38 PM
It's not often that the snarky rejoinder is funnier than the original joke; but you, sir, have accomplished such a feat.

That sort of shit pains me, LMNO. 
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 02, 2012, 08:27:40 PM
YOU'RE THE CANCER THAT'S KILLING PD!
    /
:joshua:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on August 02, 2012, 08:28:29 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 02, 2012, 08:27:40 PM
YOU'RE THE CANCER THAT'S KILLING PD!
    /
:joshua:

Unfortunately, LMNO, PD may beat me to it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 02, 2012, 08:28:58 PM
Recursive meta-cancer?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on August 02, 2012, 08:30:17 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 02, 2012, 08:28:58 PM
Recursive meta-cancer?

Well, a thread called "CAKE!" is currently the most-often viewed thread, and we talk about music.

Once in a while.

Or we don't talk about anything at all.  We were doing good for a week, then nothing.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 02, 2012, 08:37:06 PM
We had some stuff going, and then FG fluffed up the board, and then everyone left.


On the offline front, I'm still hammering Nessies into something we can print.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on August 02, 2012, 08:41:18 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 02, 2012, 08:37:06 PM
We had some stuff going, and then FG fluffed up the board, and then everyone left.

I'd like to make small correction, there:

We had some stuff going, then trollbear fluffed up the board, and then everyone went haring after him, and THEN left. settled in to VIEW.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 02, 2012, 08:45:59 PM
Correction noted.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on August 02, 2012, 11:30:21 PM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on August 02, 2012, 08:30:17 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 02, 2012, 08:28:58 PM
Recursive meta-cancer?

Well, a thread called "CAKE!" is currently the most-often viewed thread, and we talk about music.

Once in a while.

Or we don't talk about anything at all.  We were doing good for a week, then nothing.

It's an election year. I can't speak for anyone else but I know that for my part, considering how jam-packed the atmosphere is with radio waves carrying insufferable bullshit, I can hardly blink without each of my eyelashes picking up some asshole's transmission about gay marriage or unemployment. And those are the quiet moments. I don't even go in the same room as my TV because it will turn itself on and start barking at me about primaries and deficits and immigration.

I guess what I'm saying is that it's hard for me to form a complete thought without getting carried off on some political tangent. I can't even browse for midget porn on the Internet without ending up reading the entire text of Common Sense, for fuck's sake. Just imagine what would happen if I tried to concentrate on something constructive.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 03, 2012, 01:26:49 AM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on August 02, 2012, 08:30:17 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 02, 2012, 08:28:58 PM
Recursive meta-cancer?

Well, a thread called "CAKE!" is currently the most-often viewed thread, and we talk about music.

Once in a while.

Or we don't talk about anything at all.  We were doing good for a week, then nothing.

Or its me in a music thread talking to myself or getting off topic about heavy metal.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 03, 2012, 01:27:54 AM
Quote from: Bruce Twiddleton on August 03, 2012, 01:26:49 AM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on August 02, 2012, 08:30:17 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 02, 2012, 08:28:58 PM
Recursive meta-cancer?

Well, a thread called "CAKE!" is currently the most-often viewed thread, and we talk about music.

Once in a while.

Or we don't talk about anything at all.  We were doing good for a week, then nothing.

Or its me in a music thread talking to myself or getting off topic about heavy metal.

Though to be honest, I don't see how interesting a bunch of shows that most of you won't be able to see until I hop on Amtrak with my acoustic will be to anyone.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on August 03, 2012, 01:29:47 AM
Yeah, what's up with that.  I was all excited to see a metal thread and you spags start talking about Mass Towns.


Less Massholery, Moar Slayer!!!

:argh!:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 03, 2012, 01:31:16 AM
Quote from: Gen. Disregard on August 03, 2012, 01:29:47 AM
Yeah, what's up with that.  I was all excited to see a metal thread and you spags start talking about Mass Towns.


Less Massholery, Moar Slayer!!!

:argh!:

Normally, I tolerate thread drift if I started the thread. But we can start talking metal again. I like talking metal.

Also, that's why they call us Massholes, Mainiac.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on August 11, 2012, 08:00:39 AM
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage. — Anais Nin
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on August 12, 2012, 07:16:49 PM
BFF:
You should check this guy Mika. He's like a gay Freddy Mercury.

ME:
...

ME:
Are you trying to suggest Freddy Mercury wasn't gay?

BFF:
Clearly, I mean a GAYER Freddy Mercury.

And he was right.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 12, 2012, 07:22:32 PM
Mika is the Platonic Form of Camp.

And because PD will not believe without evidence: "Grace Kelly (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CGVgAYJyjk)".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 12, 2012, 07:28:56 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 12, 2012, 07:22:32 PM
Mika is the Platonic Form of Camp.

And because PD will not believe without evidence: "Grace Kelly (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CGVgAYJyjk)".

That was FABULOUS!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on August 12, 2012, 10:57:54 PM
Quote from: Dear Departed Uncle Nigel on August 12, 2012, 07:28:56 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 12, 2012, 07:22:32 PM
Mika is the Platonic Form of Camp.

And because PD will not believe without evidence: "Grace Kelly (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CGVgAYJyjk)".

That was FABULOUS!
Quote"there is a way of discussing sexuality without using labels."
on his sexuality: "I've never ever labelled myself. But having said that; I've never limited my life, I've never limited who I sleep with... Call me whatever you want. Call me bisexual, if you need a term for me..."
"I consider myself label-less because I could fall in love with anybody - literally - any type, any body. I'm not picky."
I like this guy.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on August 12, 2012, 11:14:03 PM
Quote from: Dear Departed Uncle Nigel on August 12, 2012, 07:28:56 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 12, 2012, 07:22:32 PM
Mika is the Platonic Form of Camp.

And because PD will not believe without evidence: "Grace Kelly (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CGVgAYJyjk)".

That was FABULOUS!

Holy shit was that ever!

Quote from: :regret: on August 12, 2012, 10:57:54 PM
Quote from: Dear Departed Uncle Nigel on August 12, 2012, 07:28:56 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 12, 2012, 07:22:32 PM
Mika is the Platonic Form of Camp.

And because PD will not believe without evidence: "Grace Kelly (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CGVgAYJyjk)".

That was FABULOUS!
Quote"there is a way of discussing sexuality without using labels."
on his sexuality: "I've never ever labelled myself. But having said that; I've never limited my life, I've never limited who I sleep with... Call me whatever you want. Call me bisexual, if you need a term for me..."
"I consider myself label-less because I could fall in love with anybody - literally - any type, any body. I'm not picky."
I like this guy.

SquuuUEEEeeeeEEEEeeeEEE!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on September 04, 2012, 04:58:02 AM
"Although pornography has been around for centuries, its availability on the Internet has opened the door for more perversion than ever before. Pornography is no longer just photos of nude women, but a major industry with tentacles reaching into every segment of society. " - The Center for Moral Clarity
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: I'm having trouble deciding if that was deliberate or merely unfortunate wording.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on September 04, 2012, 05:31:40 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 04, 2012, 04:58:02 AM
"Although pornography has been around for centuries, its availability on the Internet has opened the door for more perversion than ever before. Pornography is no longer just photos of nude women, but a major industry with tentacles reaching into every segment of society. " - The Center for Moral Clarity
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: I'm having trouble deciding if that was deliberate or merely unfortunate wording.

I'm going to assume that they intentionally blocked out hentai from their memories as a defense mechanism.

Twid,
Knows what genki-genki is as a result of Pickles. Not because he enjoys it. No. he just wanted to see my reaction.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on September 04, 2012, 05:52:55 AM
Urban dictionary is failing me, but do I really want to know anyway?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on September 04, 2012, 05:55:39 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 04, 2012, 05:52:55 AM
Urban dictionary is failing me, but do I really want to know anyway?

No.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on September 04, 2012, 06:12:42 AM
Quote from: Net on September 04, 2012, 05:55:39 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 04, 2012, 05:52:55 AM
Urban dictionary is failing me, but do I really want to know anyway?

No.

Yes.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on September 04, 2012, 07:38:46 AM
Quote from: Freeky Queen of DERP on September 04, 2012, 06:12:42 AM
Quote from: Net on September 04, 2012, 05:55:39 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 04, 2012, 05:52:55 AM
Urban dictionary is failing me, but do I really want to know anyway?

No.

Yes.
You know that one thing hentai does because they are not allowed to depict uncensored penises? involving cephalods and the like?
When people LARP that it is called genki-genki.
At least, that is all i know about it. I stopped listening.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on September 18, 2012, 11:17:41 PM
"Being poor itself is not yet a crime, but in at least a third of the states, being in debt can now land you in jail. If a creditor like a landlord or credit card company has a court summons issued for you and you fail to show up on your appointed court date, a warrant will be issued for your arrest. And it is easy enough to miss a court summons, which may have been delivered to the wrong address or, in the case of some bottom-feeding bill collectors, simply tossed in the garbage — a practice so common that the industry even has a term for it: "sewer service." In a sequence that National Public Radio reports is "increasingly common," a person is stopped for some minor traffic offense — having a noisy muffler, say, or broken brake light — at which point the officer discovers the warrant and the unwitting offender is whisked off to jail."
—  Barbara Ehrenreich, Looting the Lives of the Poor
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Kai on September 19, 2012, 02:20:25 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on September 18, 2012, 11:17:41 PM
"Being poor itself is not yet a crime, but in at least a third of the states, being in debt can now land you in jail. If a creditor like a landlord or credit card company has a court summons issued for you and you fail to show up on your appointed court date, a warrant will be issued for your arrest. And it is easy enough to miss a court summons, which may have been delivered to the wrong address or, in the case of some bottom-feeding bill collectors, simply tossed in the garbage — a practice so common that the industry even has a term for it: "sewer service." In a sequence that National Public Radio reports is "increasingly common," a person is stopped for some minor traffic offense — having a noisy muffler, say, or broken brake light — at which point the officer discovers the warrant and the unwitting offender is whisked off to jail."
—  Barbara Ehrenreich, Looting the Lives of the Poor

Debtors prisons...

This night has not been treating me well with news. I think I need to sleep or fuck off the planet or something.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 19, 2012, 07:12:41 PM
R.V. Jones, the man more or less in charge of British scientific intelligence during WWII, describes how acclimatization to small changes can be made to work for one's benefit, via the story of American physicist R.W. Wood:

QuoteWood at one stage in his early career worked in Paris and lived in a block of flats. He observed that the lady in the flat below kept a small tortoise in a window box. He secured a supply of tortoises of various sizes and by means of a grappling device ... fished out the original tortoise and replaced it by one that was slightly larger. Over the course of a week or so, by successive small increases of size of tortoise, the lady was convinced that her pet was growing at an astonishing rate.... Wood ... suggested that the lady might write to a newspaper about it. This she did.... Wood reversed his nightly procedure, and to everyone's astonishment the tortoise gradually shrank to its original size.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on September 19, 2012, 10:12:49 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 19, 2012, 07:12:41 PM
R.V. Jones, the man more or less in charge of British scientific intelligence during WWII, describes how acclimatization to small changes can be made to work for one's benefit, via the story of American physicist R.W. Wood:

QuoteWood at one stage in his early career worked in Paris and lived in a block of flats. He observed that the lady in the flat below kept a small tortoise in a window box. He secured a supply of tortoises of various sizes and by means of a grappling device ... fished out the original tortoise and replaced it by one that was slightly larger. Over the course of a week or so, by successive small increases of size of tortoise, the lady was convinced that her pet was growing at an astonishing rate.... Wood ... suggested that the lady might write to a newspaper about it. This she did.... Wood reversed his nightly procedure, and to everyone's astonishment the tortoise gradually shrank to its original size.

This sounds like the plot of a Roald Dahl book.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 20, 2012, 12:30:17 AM
Classmate: Deus ex machina is the crane device, right?
Me: In Greek it's Apo Mekhanes Theos.
Classmate: How do you know that?
Me: It's my trampstamp.
Classmate: 0_0
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 20, 2012, 02:07:44 AM
Classmate:....Grey Dawn is an awesome spoof of Red Dawn, with old people coming down with AARP parachutes and wheelchairs and guns...
Me: Were they all John McCain?
Professor: *spits water out*
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on September 20, 2012, 04:55:01 AM
J1: My exercise balls are smaller than yours, but mine have pictures of a phoenix on them.

Richter: I'm pretty sure that's actually a rooster there.

J1: Why would my balls have a.....

::laughter paralyzes my department for the next minute::
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 20, 2012, 07:28:21 AM
Quote from: Guru Qu1x073 on September 19, 2012, 10:12:49 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 19, 2012, 07:12:41 PM
R.V. Jones, the man more or less in charge of British scientific intelligence during WWII, describes how acclimatization to small changes can be made to work for one's benefit, via the story of American physicist R.W. Wood:

QuoteWood at one stage in his early career worked in Paris and lived in a block of flats. He observed that the lady in the flat below kept a small tortoise in a window box. He secured a supply of tortoises of various sizes and by means of a grappling device ... fished out the original tortoise and replaced it by one that was slightly larger. Over the course of a week or so, by successive small increases of size of tortoise, the lady was convinced that her pet was growing at an astonishing rate.... Wood ... suggested that the lady might write to a newspaper about it. This she did.... Wood reversed his nightly procedure, and to everyone's astonishment the tortoise gradually shrank to its original size.

This sounds like the plot of a Roald Dahl book.

Pretty much all of British scientific intelligence were avid pranksters of some kind or another.  Which worked out well, since while in theory they were meant to be developing defences against secret German superweapons, what they actually did for most of the war was troll Germans with disinformation about their own superweapons, use German tracking beams to launch precision strikes against Germany's own military installations, or invent simple yet highly annoying methods like Window (the first chaff system), which baffled German engineers to the point that Goering himself was making fun of the Lufwaffe's incompetence.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Placid Dingo on September 20, 2012, 07:52:35 AM
Quote from: Guru Qu1x073 on September 19, 2012, 10:12:49 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 19, 2012, 07:12:41 PM
R.V. Jones, the man more or less in charge of British scientific intelligence during WWII, describes how acclimatization to small changes can be made to work for one's benefit, via the story of American physicist R.W. Wood:

QuoteWood at one stage in his early career worked in Paris and lived in a block of flats. He observed that the lady in the flat below kept a small tortoise in a window box. He secured a supply of tortoises of various sizes and by means of a grappling device ... fished out the original tortoise and replaced it by one that was slightly larger. Over the course of a week or so, by successive small increases of size of tortoise, the lady was convinced that her pet was growing at an astonishing rate.... Wood ... suggested that the lady might write to a newspaper about it. This she did.... Wood reversed his nightly procedure, and to everyone's astonishment the tortoise gradually shrank to its original size.

This sounds like the plot of a Roald Dahl book.

I'm pretty certain that this story actually was the inspiration for Esio Trot, which has a near identical plot.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on September 20, 2012, 08:31:31 AM
Me: "So it sounds like Jesus had a wife and a female disciple."
Mom: "I bet she gave great blowjobs."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 20, 2012, 02:55:45 PM
"A man wears a mustache because there's something he wants to conceal, a spiritual defect."

- Ayn Rand
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 20, 2012, 03:35:07 PM
Quote from: Net on September 20, 2012, 08:31:31 AM
Me: "So it sounds like Jesus had a wife and a female disciple."
Mom: "I bet she gave great blowjobs."

Coolest. Mom. Ever.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on September 21, 2012, 09:46:07 PM
At work:
Quote
Manager: Are you staying late tonight? When are you leaving?
Female Employee: Uh, like 5:30. I'm getting my eyebrows threaded at 5:45.
Mgr: Okay I'll leave the -- wait, what? You get your eyebrows threaded?
F.E.: Yeah, is that OK?
Mgr: Yeah, I guess. So..
F.E.: What?
Mgr: So, those aren't your real eyebrows?
Everybody: <laugh>
F.E.: Yes, what are you...?
Mgr: I thought threading was when they sewed bushier eyebrows on.
F.E.: <steam>
Everybody: <AAAHAHAHAHAHA>
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on September 21, 2012, 09:55:39 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 20, 2012, 02:55:45 PM
"A man wears a mustache because there's something he wants to conceal, a spiritual defect."

- Ayn Rand
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:46:20 AM
Incoming. Needs edits.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 22, 2012, 03:48:18 AM
"Something really cool and hilarious that I thought I should share."
- Fidel Castro
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on September 22, 2012, 03:49:39 AM
Quote from: Fidel Castro on September 22, 2012, 03:48:18 AM
"Something really cool and hilarious that I thought I should share."
- Fidel Castro
Lulz emote and/or witty rejoinder.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 22, 2012, 03:50:16 AM
Quote from: Doktor D. Jennifer Phox on September 22, 2012, 03:49:39 AM
Quote from: Fidel Castro on September 22, 2012, 03:48:18 AM
"Something really cool and hilarious that I thought I should share."
- Fidel Castro
Lulz emote and/or witty rejoinder.
Angry response and red baboon ass display.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:50:34 AM
Me and Phox, via gchat:

Twid:  I also unfortunately am at least part way convinced we are the most advanced technological species in this part of the galaxy, if not the whole thing.
Phox:  well, it's a damn shame but...
T:  Not the only intelligent species, just the most advanced.
P:  oh, sure.
speaking of which, thanks...
now I'm going to add Spore to the list of games I'm going to reinstall and play again. (joining two you will approve ove of, Rome: total War and Star Trek Online).
T:  Theoretically I approve. I try to avoid computer games. I haven't played that many.
It's like one of those heretics that shun TV. It's incomprehensible but they have their reasons, I'm sure.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5T_R40Zb--U (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5T_R40Zb--U)
P:  hehe
T:  I remembered the song at work but not how it went, and I was like, shit. Gotta youtube it later.
P:  yeah.
T:  But seriously, seeing how I react to Civ, computer games, especially any that involve strategy, are really horrible ideas for me to play.
P:  haha, why's that?
T:  Unless I feel like being one of those dead Korean nerds who don't eat or piss.
P:  HA.
well, yeah, it's good to have self-control.
I think you would like RTW though.
T:  When I play Civ, I ignore all biological impetus.
Oh I would probably love it.
I would also probably love cocaine.
P:  this is true.
cost-benefit analysis, you know. :lulz:
T:  Yep
That's gotta go in quotes of the moment
That whole thing
Sent at 10:45 PM on Friday

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:51:48 AM
Well, if you find it boring, I can delete it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 22, 2012, 03:52:41 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:51:48 AM
Well, if you find it boring, I can delete it.

What?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:54:23 AM
Quote from: Fidel Castro on September 22, 2012, 03:52:41 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:51:48 AM
Well, if you find it boring, I can delete it.

What?

Probably just misinterpreting. Nevermind.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on September 22, 2012, 04:00:03 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:54:23 AM
Quote from: Fidel Castro on September 22, 2012, 03:52:41 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:51:48 AM
Well, if you find it boring, I can delete it.

What?

Probably just misinterpreting. Nevermind.
Interpretations are tricky things. Like rolling socks. I never could get the hang of that, either.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 04:18:57 AM
Quote from: Doktor D. Jennifer Phox on September 22, 2012, 04:00:03 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:54:23 AM
Quote from: Fidel Castro on September 22, 2012, 03:52:41 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 03:51:48 AM
Well, if you find it boring, I can delete it.

What?

Probably just misinterpreting. Nevermind.
Interpretations are tricky things. Like rolling socks. I never could get the hang of that, either.  :lulz:

You don't roll socks. You grab two socks and put them on.

I learned this from Dimo.

Twid,

:looks down:

Actually, they're matching today....
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 22, 2012, 06:54:33 AM
Quote from: Fidel Castro on September 22, 2012, 03:48:18 AM
"Something really cool and hilarious that I thought I should share."
- Fidel Castro

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on September 22, 2012, 10:47:41 AM
Personally I think this is the best personal info I'll come up with anywhere ever.


Basic Info
Birthday   August 6, 1981
Sex   Male
Interested In   Women
Relationship Status   In a relationship with [Villager]
Languages   English, Latin, Irish, French and Russian
Religious Views   Discordianism
Schroedinger's Catholic.

Don't open the box. I'll either become the Pope or the Antichrist. I'd rather be just me.... Unless Antichrist gets me a record deal.....
Political Views   Independent
Hamish Howl, 2012
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 27, 2012, 06:59:23 PM
Oh dear Lord.

I'm reading The eXile: Sex, Drugs and Libel in the New Russia and it really has me wondering how the hell did Taibbi and Ames not end up getting killed?

I mean, there is stuff like this:

QuoteThe interacting we were doing with the domestic population wasn't exactly constructive.  While other Western journalists were writing glowing portraits of the new Deputy Prime Minister Boris Nemetov and helping him attract foreign investment, the eXile was calling up Nemetov's press service in the guise of a Japanese businessman called Hashimoto Godzilla and demanding tee times and a recommendation for a good suishi restaurant in Moscow.

And:

QuoteOne night during the summer I woke up in a cold sweat.  I'd had a terrible dream and for a moment had no idea where I was or what day it was.  I had a cup of tea, went back to sleep and then woke up again half an hour later with an idea.  Why not try to hire Mikhail Gorbachev to be an assistant coach for the New York Jets?

And:

QuoteWe were hassling everybody.  When dictator Mobutu Sese Soko finally got tossed out of Zaire, we called up practically every hotel in Moscow in the guise of Mobutu aides, in order to see how many would be willing to take in the Butcher of Kinhasa as a guest in exile.  Not surprisingly, all the obsequious wannabe "Westernized" Russians in the swanky new business hotels jumped at the business.

QuoteIn another case, we convinced the administration at the old communist organ Pravda that they had been bought out by a blind, Jewish dwarf from Florida named Barry Apfelbaum, who planned on using the paper to promote a chain of Sears and Roebuck store in Moscow.

And to be fair, they did come rather close to dying at least once:

QuoteIn September, Mark ran into a richly dressed girl at an expat party who turned out to be the daughter of a very powerful and scary (read: we are still afraid to mention his name even here, years later) member of the Russian government.  She had read our paper: "I know how you write," she said to Mark.  "If you write about me, I'll have you killed.  And I can do that, you know," she said seriously

Also, the Death Porn installments probably weren't helping any:

QuoteIn the spring of 1996, I'd interviewed Alexander Bukhanovsky, the criminal psychiatrist whom many Americans know from the HBO movie Citizen X, about the Russian serial killer Andrei Chikatilo.  Bukhanovsky was the country's leading expert on sex crime, and after a sinister lunch of vodka and home movies - tapes of murders that Bukhanovsky's patients had filmed - he let me in on a secret.  "In Russia, at any given time, there are one hundred serial killers operating," he said.  "And those are only the series that are conspiciously series.  I'm not talking about people who have killed twice, three times.  We've got tons of those.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 27, 2012, 07:13:49 PM
Oh god, it just got even worse.

QuoteOnce in the spring of 1997, for instance, Mark and I were lounging around in the office when we suddenly started discussing, as a kind of amusing intellectual exercise, suicide plans.  Not actual kill-yourself suicide, but suicide articles - ways to horrify our readers so totally that we'd put ourselves out of business overnight.

The idea we eventually came up with was a cover with a giant close-up of a puzzled black face, accompanied by a banner headline: "NIGGERS: Where Did They Come From And What Are They Doing Here?"

Well, that'd do it, we thought.

Out of consideration for the black community and for everyone else we knew would be permamently turned off by it, we sat on the joke for a full year.  But finally, in the spring of 1998, we gave in and ran it - though not on our own cover, but on the cover of a spoof copy of the locally published Russia Review that we were designing for a parody of the magazine.

[...]

When we finally designed it, it looked exactly like one of their own ads.  By now giving up all hope of maintaining discretion, Mark added a text to the ad that was even more horrifically inappropriate.  It took a vicious dig at the 6'9" ex-Boston Celtics forward Marcus Webb, who was now in Moscow playing for the Red Army (CSKA) basketball team after having been tossed out of the NBA for the forcible sodomy of a girl in Boston.  Using the usual cheerleading tones of the Russia Review ads, he plugged a fictional Review feature on Webb's success as a new black entrepreneur in Russia, lauding a "jelly and lubicrant" factory we claimed he had opened.

When I saw Mark typing that up on the screen, I sighed.  Great, I thought.  It wasnt enough that we were alienating the entire blakc community for no good reason.  No, Mark had to go one step further and single out the very biggest and brawniest black man in Russia for unprovoked attack.  Now we were marked men: you could practically start the t-minus for the inevitable humiliating beating.  I could feel the Reebok sole patterns rising on my neck already.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Phox on September 27, 2012, 07:19:51 PM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on September 27, 2012, 07:46:52 PM
Whait -- IS THIS BOOK FOR SALE RIGHT NOW?  I MUST READ IT.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 27, 2012, 08:17:36 PM
It's only been available for the last 12 years  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on September 27, 2012, 08:36:34 PM
<----   :pwned:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 03:55:21 AM
For some reason Villager and I just now got on to the topic of humanity maybe getting to 10 c with warp drive.

Twid: "Alpha Centauri in 4 months. Pluto in less than an hour."
Villager: "Why would we go to Pluto? It's not even a planet."
Twid: "Because it's something to explore. When I'm an Admiral in Starfleet, I'm going to reject your application on the grounds that you don't have the right values."
Villager: "Ha!"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 13, 2012, 04:08:53 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 03:55:21 AM
For some reason Villager and I just now got on to the topic of humanity maybe getting to 10 c with warp drive.

Twid: "Alpha Centauri in 4 months. Pluto in less than an hour."
Villager: "Why would we go to Pluto? It's not even a planet."
Twid: "Because it's something to explore. When I'm an Admiral in Starfleet, I'm going to reject your application on the grounds that you don't have the right values."
Villager: "Ha!"

BECAUSE IT IS FUCKING THERE!!!!

FUCKING SPACE COMMIES!!!!

AND THE MIGO!!!!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:14:39 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 04:08:53 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 03:55:21 AM
For some reason Villager and I just now got on to the topic of humanity maybe getting to 10 c with warp drive.

Twid: "Alpha Centauri in 4 months. Pluto in less than an hour."
Villager: "Why would we go to Pluto? It's not even a planet."
Twid: "Because it's something to explore. When I'm an Admiral in Starfleet, I'm going to reject your application on the grounds that you don't have the right values."
Villager: "Ha!"

BECAUSE IT IS FUCKING THERE!!!!

FUCKING SPACE COMMIES!!!!

AND THE MIGO!!!!!

Exactly. Hey, you want me to explore Vesta? Cool man, I'm exploring Vesta. That's just as awesome as meeting smug Vulcans. Maybe even awesomer, if you've ever watched Enterprise.

Just saying. Humans can't stand a mystery. No one's ever gone to Pluto and I can, on a day trip?

Hey, point the ship that way. I got a flag that says TWID dd/mm/yyyy on it. Also, it's Saturday. So yeah...

Hey NDT, see this flag? Yeah dude. :p
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:15:50 AM
Also, what is Migo?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 13, 2012, 04:18:01 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:15:50 AM
Also, what is Migo?

Half-crustacean half-fungus space aliens that live on Pluto and some times visit Earth to steal human brains.
Something that visited a strange white man in Providence in the 19th century.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:21:46 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 04:18:01 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:15:50 AM
Also, what is Migo?

Half-crustacean half-fungus space aliens that live on Pluto and some times visit Earth to steal human brains.
Something that visited a strange white man in Providence in the 19th century.

I think I may have glutted myself too much on the Lovecraft in one se...

Oh wait... :checks book: Whisperer In The Darkness. Yuggoth.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:25:29 AM
Well, anyway, Pluto is 5 light hours away.

The edge of the sun's gravitational dominance is about a light year away.

The sun's heliopause is being penetrated now with subrelativistic craft, after, what, 40 years?

10c opens up a lot of shit. And not just exotic shit. Shit that we can put to immediate use and immediate study, and immediate colonization.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 13, 2012, 05:12:01 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

It's the Greeks' fault. If they hadn't been fucking off drinking wine and owning slaves, we would have had largescale mechanical industry before Jebus was born, and the world would have ended due to global warming before were alive.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 13, 2012, 05:17:40 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 05:12:01 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

It's the Greeks' fault. If they hadn't been fucking off drinking wine and owning slaves, we would have had largescale mechanical industry before Jebus was born, and the world would have ended due to global warming before were alive.

And those FUCKING ROMANS quit on us, and BAM!  Another 1000 years wasted.

Assholes.  WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ALIEN DANCING THING?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 13, 2012, 05:19:49 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:17:40 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 05:12:01 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

It's the Greeks' fault. If they hadn't been fucking off drinking wine and owning slaves, we would have had largescale mechanical industry before Jebus was born, and the world would have ended due to global warming before were alive.

And those FUCKING ROMANS quit on us, and BAM!  Another 1000 years wasted.

Assholes.  WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ALIEN DANCING THING?

Now I feel the urge to create a campaign setting around global warming occuring during the "dark ages" because of premature industrial revolution.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 13, 2012, 05:28:38 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 05:19:49 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:17:40 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 05:12:01 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

It's the Greeks' fault. If they hadn't been fucking off drinking wine and owning slaves, we would have had largescale mechanical industry before Jebus was born, and the world would have ended due to global warming before were alive.

And those FUCKING ROMANS quit on us, and BAM!  Another 1000 years wasted.

Assholes.  WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ALIEN DANCING THING?

Now I feel the urge to create a campaign setting around global warming occuring during the "dark ages" because of premature industrial revolution.

Wouldn't have happened the same way.  Global warming is a function of population.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 05:44:38 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

NANOBOTS DUDE.

SORRY TO TELL YOU, BUT YOU ACTUALLY ARE GOING TO BE IMMORTAL.

REALLY REALLY SORRY.

ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, YOU CAN RUIN TOILETS FOR LITERAL SHITS AND GIGGLES UNTIL YOU GET BORED WITH IT.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 13, 2012, 05:58:34 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 05:44:38 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

NANOBOTS DUDE.

SORRY TO TELL YOU, BUT YOU ACTUALLY ARE GOING TO BE IMMORTAL.

REALLY REALLY SORRY.

ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, YOU CAN RUIN TOILETS FOR LITERAL SHITS AND GIGGLES UNTIL YOU GET BORED WITH IT.

If I can shit disassemblers, I'm okay with immortality.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 06:05:20 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:58:34 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 05:44:38 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

NANOBOTS DUDE.

SORRY TO TELL YOU, BUT YOU ACTUALLY ARE GOING TO BE IMMORTAL.

REALLY REALLY SORRY.

ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, YOU CAN RUIN TOILETS FOR LITERAL SHITS AND GIGGLES UNTIL YOU GET BORED WITH IT.

If I can shit disassemblers, I'm okay with immortality.

\m/
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on October 13, 2012, 06:31:10 PM
From a phone interview I did a while ago.

me: So what are the biggest drug problems in the Valley, in your opinion?
interviewee: marijuana, followed by meth.

:lulz: Whut.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 13, 2012, 06:39:58 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on October 13, 2012, 06:31:10 PM
From a phone interview I did a while ago.

me: So what are the biggest drug problems in the Valley, in your opinion?
interviewee: marijuana, followed by meth.

:lulz: Whut.

Well, you DID ask for the "biggest", not the "worst".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on October 16, 2012, 12:52:27 AM
(http://img.gawkerassets.com/post/8/2012/10/letter.jpg)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 16, 2012, 01:39:41 AM
Wasn't there an incidence of homosexual necrophilia by a duck in a zoo?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:13:21 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

Bullshit.  If that comes out when I'm ninety, I am OFF this fucking rock full of noisy monkeys and out where it's QUIET.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 16, 2012, 02:17:02 AM
Quote from: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:13:21 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

Bullshit.  If that comes out when I'm ninety, I am OFF this fucking rock full of noisy monkeys and out where it's QUIET.

TAKE ALL THE RETARDS WITH YOU.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:19:04 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 16, 2012, 02:17:02 AM
Quote from: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:13:21 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

Bullshit.  If that comes out when I'm ninety, I am OFF this fucking rock full of noisy monkeys and out where it's QUIET.

TAKE ALL THE RETARDS WITH YOU.

FUCK no.  They can stay here and wallow in the filth.

Who do you think I'm getting AWAY from?

First teabagger I catch in space is going RIGHT out the airlock.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 16, 2012, 02:28:27 AM
Quote from: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:19:04 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 16, 2012, 02:17:02 AM
Quote from: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:13:21 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

Bullshit.  If that comes out when I'm ninety, I am OFF this fucking rock full of noisy monkeys and out where it's QUIET.

TAKE ALL THE RETARDS WITH YOU.

FUCK no.  They can stay here and wallow in the filth.

Who do you think I'm getting AWAY from?

First teabagger I catch in space is going RIGHT out the airlock.

Don't care what you do with them.  Grind 'em up for their constituent parts, for all I care.  Just TAKE THEM.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:31:44 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 16, 2012, 02:28:27 AM
Quote from: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:19:04 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 16, 2012, 02:17:02 AM
Quote from: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:13:21 AM
Quote from: Man Yellow on October 13, 2012, 05:09:39 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 04:27:02 AM
In other words, I am really, really chuffed about 10c and will die happy if I see that happen.

BUT IT COULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED 25 YEARS AGO, COULD IT.

TGRR,
TOO FUCKING OLD NOW.

Bullshit.  If that comes out when I'm ninety, I am OFF this fucking rock full of noisy monkeys and out where it's QUIET.

TAKE ALL THE RETARDS WITH YOU.

FUCK no.  They can stay here and wallow in the filth.

Who do you think I'm getting AWAY from?

First teabagger I catch in space is going RIGHT out the airlock.

Don't care what you do with them.  Grind 'em up for their constituent parts, for all I care.  Just TAKE THEM.

Look, it's not that I don't WANT to take them and leave you in peace...  It's just that the sheer mass of all of that STUPID would prevent us from reaching escape velocity.

Besides, if I take all the tards, you wouldn't have anybody to rant about, your rage gland would back up, and you KNOW what happens then.  You REMEMBER Tunguska.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on October 16, 2012, 02:35:19 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 04:08:53 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 03:55:21 AM
For some reason Villager and I just now got on to the topic of humanity maybe getting to 10 c with warp drive.

Twid: "Alpha Centauri in 4 months. Pluto in less than an hour."
Villager: "Why would we go to Pluto? It's not even a planet."
Twid: "Because it's something to explore. When I'm an Admiral in Starfleet, I'm going to reject your application on the grounds that you don't have the right values."
Villager: "Ha!"

BECAUSE IT IS FUCKING THERE!!!!

FUCKING SPACE COMMIES!!!!

AND THE MIGO!!!!!

Who flies down from the stars
To hum a few bars
And dissect your neighbors dog
They ain't got no eyes
But are really fun-guys
Everyone knows it's the MIGO.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 16, 2012, 02:48:48 AM
Quote from: Richter, Baron von on October 16, 2012, 02:35:19 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 04:08:53 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 03:55:21 AM
For some reason Villager and I just now got on to the topic of humanity maybe getting to 10 c with warp drive.

Twid: "Alpha Centauri in 4 months. Pluto in less than an hour."
Villager: "Why would we go to Pluto? It's not even a planet."
Twid: "Because it's something to explore. When I'm an Admiral in Starfleet, I'm going to reject your application on the grounds that you don't have the right values."
Villager: "Ha!"

BECAUSE IT IS FUCKING THERE!!!!

FUCKING SPACE COMMIES!!!!

AND THE MIGO!!!!!

Who flies down from the stars
To hum a few bars
And dissect your neighbors dog
They ain't got no eyes
But are really fun-guys
Everyone knows it's the MIGO.

:lulz::mittens::lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:55:33 AM
Quote from: Richter, Baron von on October 16, 2012, 02:35:19 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 04:08:53 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 03:55:21 AM
For some reason Villager and I just now got on to the topic of humanity maybe getting to 10 c with warp drive.

Twid: "Alpha Centauri in 4 months. Pluto in less than an hour."
Villager: "Why would we go to Pluto? It's not even a planet."
Twid: "Because it's something to explore. When I'm an Admiral in Starfleet, I'm going to reject your application on the grounds that you don't have the right values."
Villager: "Ha!"

BECAUSE IT IS FUCKING THERE!!!!

FUCKING SPACE COMMIES!!!!

AND THE MIGO!!!!!

Who flies down from the stars
To hum a few bars
And dissect your neighbors dog
They ain't got no eyes
But are really fun-guys
Everyone knows it's the MIGO.

Goddamnit, that's gonna be stuck in my head all night.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on October 16, 2012, 03:03:02 AM
:hammer:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on October 16, 2012, 03:09:38 AM
Quote from: Richter, Baron von on October 16, 2012, 03:03:02 AM
:hammer:

Sure, dance now.

I will have my revenge.

Oh, yes, I will...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 16, 2012, 03:21:49 AM
Quote from: Luna on October 16, 2012, 02:55:33 AM
Quote from: Richter, Baron von on October 16, 2012, 02:35:19 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 13, 2012, 04:08:53 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 13, 2012, 03:55:21 AM
For some reason Villager and I just now got on to the topic of humanity maybe getting to 10 c with warp drive.

Twid: "Alpha Centauri in 4 months. Pluto in less than an hour."
Villager: "Why would we go to Pluto? It's not even a planet."
Twid: "Because it's something to explore. When I'm an Admiral in Starfleet, I'm going to reject your application on the grounds that you don't have the right values."
Villager: "Ha!"

BECAUSE IT IS FUCKING THERE!!!!

FUCKING SPACE COMMIES!!!!

AND THE MIGO!!!!!

Who flies down from the stars
To hum a few bars
And dissect your neighbors dog
They ain't got no eyes
But are really fun-guys
Everyone knows it's the MIGO.

Goddamnit, that's gonna be stuck in my head all night.
I sang this out loud and...
:baby:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on October 16, 2012, 12:31:51 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 16, 2012, 01:39:41 AM
Wasn't there an incidence of homosexual necrophilia by a duck in a zoo?
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/03/09/gay_duck_honour/

The dutch again, ofcourse.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on October 17, 2012, 04:03:02 AM
At Dunkin' Donuts.
Quote
Mrs. V3x: Can I get a Caramel Iced Coffee please?
DD Cashier: Would you like coffee in that?
MV: (confused) Uh... yeah. Caramel Iced Coffee, please.
DDC: Yeah, but would you like coffee in that?
MV: (annoyed) Yes. Caramel. Iced. Coffee. Large. Please.
DDC: Okay, so you... want coffee?
MV: YES I WOULD LIKE COFFEE IN MY ICED COFFEE PLEASE.
Next guy in line: BAHAHAHAHA
DDC: OK :(
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on October 23, 2012, 02:53:43 AM
Me: I think it's best to be a little suspicious of anything Rumsfeld has done.
Tea Bagger Stepdad: No, it's not.


:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 27, 2012, 05:20:45 AM
My son just said to his friend, "Well aren't you just a dandy little ball of fuck".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 27, 2012, 05:21:14 AM
It sounded like it might perhaps have been a compliment, but it seems to work either way.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on October 27, 2012, 05:32:25 AM
:lulz: I like the turn of phrase.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 27, 2012, 05:41:33 AM
I, too, found it rather memorable.  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 27, 2012, 06:41:17 AM
Oh wow.

QuoteThe American Dream, just like George Washington, is dead. Unlike George Washington, however, no one ever bothered to bury the American Dream. Instead of giving the dream a proper burial, we've stood the old lady up like a scarecrow, perverted her with makeup and a boob job, and then sat her out by the statue of liberty to mock incoming immigrants.

From http://shitmystudentswrite.tumblr.com/
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on October 27, 2012, 10:21:53 AM
"I JUST WANT IPHONE 5! APPLE, YOU MAKE US WAIT IN LINE OUTSIDE STORE LIKE FOR FREE BREAD!"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on October 27, 2012, 10:39:58 AM
Related:

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EXEisRIrL3w



Edit: garbage
I forgot what thread this was related to.  Still, it made me lol
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 27, 2012, 06:24:42 PM
Quote from: Net on October 27, 2012, 10:21:53 AM
"I JUST WANT IPHONE 5! APPLE, YOU MAKE US WAIT IN LINE OUTSIDE STORE LIKE FOR FREE BREAD!"

Yes, yes. The corporate thugs from Apple are forcing you to by this unnecessary thing right now as if it were the Soviet Union and you were in line for something you actually needed. Those evil, evil bastards.

Here's a thought. Maybe just fucking wait or be happy with the phone you have now. My phone's a $20 piece of shit from MetroPCS. Why'd I get it and why do I still have it? It does what I need it to, and it cost $20.


:horrormirth:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on October 28, 2012, 12:29:04 AM
Quote from: :regret: on October 16, 2012, 12:31:51 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 16, 2012, 01:39:41 AM
Wasn't there an incidence of homosexual necrophilia by a duck in a zoo?
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/03/09/gay_duck_honour/

The dutch again, ofcourse.

Quote"The Effect of Country Music on Suicide."

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Internet Jesus on October 28, 2012, 12:31:50 AM
Quote from: Nigel The Rock-Throwing Goth on October 27, 2012, 05:20:45 AM
My son just said to his friend, "Well aren't you just a dandy little ball of fuck".

I don't know how you feel about your child saying that, Nigel, but holy shit that's full of magic and win.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on October 28, 2012, 12:32:28 AM
Quote from: Nigel The Rock-Throwing Goth on October 27, 2012, 05:20:45 AM
My son just said to his friend, "Well aren't you just a dandy little ball of fuck".

This is fucking GLORIOUS. Homage.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 28, 2012, 01:00:11 AM
I find my son's verbal inventiveness a perpetual source of marvel and delight.

This is the boy who gets routinely booted from Minecraft and WOW servers for sidling up to other players and softly saying "I love you".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on October 28, 2012, 01:51:41 AM
Quote from: Nigel The Rock-Throwing Goth on October 28, 2012, 01:00:11 AM
I find my son's verbal inventiveness a perpetual source of marvel and delight.

This is the boy who gets routinely booted from Minecraft and WOW servers for sidling up to other players and softly saying "I love you".

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on October 28, 2012, 02:30:45 AM
Your kid sounds like a kick. :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 28, 2012, 03:12:19 AM
Oh yes, he is! And he can cook.

Just now he was reciting a poem to the dogs. It went like this:

"Green dog, blue dog,
yellow dog, red...
fuck, I'm not Dr. Suess."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on October 28, 2012, 07:31:58 AM
Quote from: Nigel The Rock-Throwing Goth on October 28, 2012, 01:00:11 AM
I find my son's verbal inventiveness a perpetual source of marvel and delight.

This is the boy who gets routinely booted from Minecraft and WOW servers for sidling up to other players and softly saying "I love you".

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:

Epic.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on October 28, 2012, 07:35:18 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on October 27, 2012, 06:24:42 PM
Quote from: Net on October 27, 2012, 10:21:53 AM
"I JUST WANT IPHONE 5! APPLE, YOU MAKE US WAIT IN LINE OUTSIDE STORE LIKE FOR FREE BREAD!"

Yes, yes. The corporate thugs from Apple are forcing you to by this unnecessary thing right now as if it were the Soviet Union and you were in line for something you actually needed. Those evil, evil bastards.

Here's a thought. Maybe just fucking wait or be happy with the phone you have now. My phone's a $20 piece of shit from MetroPCS. Why'd I get it and why do I still have it? It does what I need it to, and it cost $20.


:horrormirth:

Right? It made my day. The fact that the guy seemed to be Eastern European made me think it was a well played troll.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 29, 2012, 03:08:19 PM
Quote from: CAKE on October 28, 2012, 01:00:11 AM
I find my son's verbal inventiveness a perpetual source of marvel and delight.

This is the boy who gets routinely booted from Minecraft and WOW servers for sidling up to other players and softly saying "I love you".

That's better than me, for sure.  My best quote from a gaming experience is "oh fuck, how the hell do you kill this thing?  Shit shit...oh, shooting it in the head seems to work."

Yes, you heard it here first: shooting things in the head kills them.  When they have a head, that is.  This fancy N7 1337 spec ops death-dealing assassin of thousands rank isn't just for show, you know?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 19, 2012, 01:46:00 AM
Today has one of those moments when you realize that you're older than you think you are because suddenly you're comfortable making certain kinds of jokes with your youngest sibling:

Twid:  I dunno [Twidcousin], I think your branch has the right idea. Don't know if you're a UU yourself, but I'll probably become one myself before I die so the Papists don't bury me. (No offense, Twidsister)
Twidsister: -had to google paptist-
Twid: There's a whole bunch of other insulting terms for Catholics. If you look into Irish history, you'll find a bunch. Popery. Popishness.
Twidsister: POPISHNESS OMG
Twid: Hopefully you googled Papist and not paptist. Paptist might bring up something else that I've never experienced.
Twidsister: ur right srry 4 the missspelling -TS

For those who may not know or have forgotten, there is a 15 year age difference between me and Twidsister (2 year difference between me and Midsister)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on November 19, 2012, 11:21:53 AM
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You and the stranger both like Internet.

Stranger: internet's ok

Stranger: ohai

You: You like to make internets?

Stranger: i have almost no experience

You: How many internets you make?

Stranger: tcp/ip nets are alright

Stranger: i manage to make two a day

Stranger: depending on the size

Stranger: mostly they are 9 inch internets

You: Do you search the deep webs?

Stranger: i have no idea of the onion protocol

You: How you know I type "onion" and erase in browser?

Stranger: well

Stranger: mmh

Stranger: twas a guess

You: What wrong with your exit nodes?

Stranger: i really gotta head out now. i iz scared

Stranger: toodles man! <3

You: Okie dokie!

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on November 19, 2012, 11:32:13 AM
Quote from: Matt TaibbiIt's a little before midnight on Friday, September 2nd, and I'm sitting in a hotel bar in Houston. Somewhere to the southeast, the worst natural disaster in American history is unfolding in  the darkness, with an entire city shrouded in death, panic and disease ─and here we are, a bunch of half-drunk, affluent white people quaffing eleven-dollar foreign beers and planning what appears to be a paramilitary mission to rescue two cats and a maid in the wreckage of New Orleans.

I'm in the lounge of the Four Seasons with Sean Penn and other assorted media creatures, debating the merits of rescuing animals instead of humans in a disaster area. To my left is the eminent historian Douglas Brinkley, a friendly academic whose careful diction reminds me of Bob Woodward's. Brinkley is my contact in Houston. He's friends with Penn, and when he evacuated his home in New Orleans earlier in the week, heleft his cats and his maid behind in the flood zone. Now he and Penn are talking about commandeering private jets, helicopters and weapons for a grand mission into hell that begins tomorrow.

I have no idea what the fuck is going on.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on November 21, 2012, 04:13:37 AM
Quote from: Net on November 19, 2012, 11:21:53 AM
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You and the stranger both like Internet.

Stranger: internet's ok

Stranger: ohai

You: You like to make internets?

Stranger: i have almost no experience

You: How many internets you make?

Stranger: tcp/ip nets are alright

Stranger: i manage to make two a day

Stranger: depending on the size

Stranger: mostly they are 9 inch internets

You: Do you search the deep webs?

Stranger: i have no idea of the onion protocol

You: How you know I type "onion" and erase in browser?

Stranger: well

Stranger: mmh

Stranger: twas a guess

You: What wrong with your exit nodes?

Stranger: i really gotta head out now. i iz scared

Stranger: toodles man! <3

You: Okie dokie!

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Whaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on November 21, 2012, 04:14:00 AM
Quote from: Cain on November 19, 2012, 11:32:13 AM
Quote from: Matt TaibbiIt's a little before midnight on Friday, September 2nd, and I'm sitting in a hotel bar in Houston. Somewhere to the southeast, the worst natural disaster in American history is unfolding in  the darkness, with an entire city shrouded in death, panic and disease ─and here we are, a bunch of half-drunk, affluent white people quaffing eleven-dollar foreign beers and planning what appears to be a paramilitary mission to rescue two cats and a maid in the wreckage of New Orleans.

I'm in the lounge of the Four Seasons with Sean Penn and other assorted media creatures, debating the merits of rescuing animals instead of humans in a disaster area. To my left is the eminent historian Douglas Brinkley, a friendly academic whose careful diction reminds me of Bob Woodward's. Brinkley is my contact in Houston. He's friends with Penn, and when he evacuated his home in New Orleans earlier in the week, heleft his cats and his maid behind in the flood zone. Now he and Penn are talking about commandeering private jets, helicopters and weapons for a grand mission into hell that begins tomorrow.

I have no idea what the fuck is going on.

Wowwww
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on November 22, 2012, 09:49:07 PM
Quote from: From the History of Bestiality by Jens Bjørneboe - my translationFrom the Russian civil war after the revolution there is an account of how the noble-hearted participants treated their prisoners: they took a prisoner and ripped up his stomach a little, so they got hold of his small intestine. They nailed it to a tree, and with glowing bayonets - that they heated in a small bonfire they had set up solely for this purpose -, with these glowing bayonets they forced the prisoner to run around the tree until his small intestine, and at best a bit of his colon was wound onto the tree like thread on a spool.
Then the prisoner was left lying by his guts until he expired in the fresh forest air.
I have a presentaton about Jens Bjørneboe at school tomorrow, and I'm considering reading this excerpt out loud but not sure if appropriate.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on November 22, 2012, 10:27:21 PM
…Do you like your classmates and teacher? If so, I recommend against it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on November 23, 2012, 02:00:36 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on November 22, 2012, 10:27:21 PM
...Do you like your classmates and teacher? If so, I recommend against it.
That's what I thought, so I dropped it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 25, 2012, 05:23:21 PM
So, I'm talking to my cousin on FB:

Her:
In other tales of family fucked uppery, Kathie and Marie want to bring Nana to see [Cousin in rehab] at the rehab center. This is not the best laid plan.

Me:
I.... WHAT?! Do they have Alzheimer's too?

Her:
Maybe their master plan is to leave her there? Even if she wad mentally sound, the facility is a rough place to be. Lots of yelling and swearing and chaos. It would do more harm than good.it is just another example of that generation ignoring the needs of our generation. I know how [cousin] feels about the extended family and this is a bad idea.

Her:
You know, if we were southern, this would just be another day. But, we are yankees and really need to get our shit together.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on November 25, 2012, 05:59:48 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on November 25, 2012, 05:23:21 PM
So, I'm talking to my cousin on FB:

Her:
In other tales of family fucked uppery, Kathie and Marie want to bring Nana to see [Cousin in rehab] at the rehab center. This is not the best laid plan.

Me:
I.... WHAT?! Do they have Alzheimer's too?

Her:
Maybe their master plan is to leave her there? Even if she wad mentally sound, the facility is a rough place to be. Lots of yelling and swearing and chaos. It would do more harm than good.it is just another example of that generation ignoring the needs of our generation. I know how [cousin] feels about the extended family and this is a bad idea.

Her:
You know, if we were southern, this would just be another day. But, we are yankees and really need to get our shit together.

Maybe Kathie and Marie should speak with Nana's doctor regarding how she might react to exposure to rehab.  Maybe see if there's anything they need to do to prepare for the trip (and give the doctor the chance to rip them new orifices).
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 25, 2012, 07:54:03 PM
Quote from: Luna on November 25, 2012, 05:59:48 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on November 25, 2012, 05:23:21 PM
So, I'm talking to my cousin on FB:

Her:
In other tales of family fucked uppery, Kathie and Marie want to bring Nana to see [Cousin in rehab] at the rehab center. This is not the best laid plan.

Me:
I.... WHAT?! Do they have Alzheimer's too?

Her:
Maybe their master plan is to leave her there? Even if she wad mentally sound, the facility is a rough place to be. Lots of yelling and swearing and chaos. It would do more harm than good.it is just another example of that generation ignoring the needs of our generation. I know how [cousin] feels about the extended family and this is a bad idea.

Her:
You know, if we were southern, this would just be another day. But, we are yankees and really need to get our shit together.

Maybe Kathie and Marie should speak with Nana's doctor regarding how she might react to exposure to rehab.  Maybe see if there's anything they need to do to prepare for the trip (and give the doctor the chance to rip them new orifices).

My other aunt talked them out of it.

But yeah. Let's take a demented elderly woman to go visit a recovering junkie. Clearly we're firing on all cyclinders here.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on November 30, 2012, 08:34:08 AM
Without a doubt, the best quote from the entire Baldurs Gate series:

Quote from: ProtagonistOkay, I've just about had my FILL of riddle-asking, quest-assigning, insult throwing, pun hurling, hostage taking, iron mongering, smart arsed fools, freaks and felons that continually test my will, mettle, strength and above all patience!  If you've got a straight answer ANYWHERE in that bent little head of yours, I want to hear it pretty damn quick, or I'm going to take a large, blunt object roughly the size of Elminster AND his hat and stuff it lengthwise into a crevice of your being so seldom seen that even the denizens of the Nine Hells themselves wouldn't touch it with a twenty-foot rusty halberd!  Have I MADE myself perfectly CLEAR?!

CHARNAME is a touchy bastard.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 30, 2012, 12:42:22 PM
Quote from: Cain on November 30, 2012, 08:34:08 AM
Without a doubt, the best quote from the entire Baldurs Gate series:

Quote from: ProtagonistOkay, I've just about had my FILL of riddle-asking, quest-assigning, insult throwing, pun hurling, hostage taking, iron mongering, smart arsed fools, freaks and felons that continually test my will, mettle, strength and above all patience!  If you've got a straight answer ANYWHERE in that bent little head of yours, I want to hear it pretty damn quick, or I'm going to take a large, blunt object roughly the size of Elminster AND his hat and stuff it lengthwise into a crevice of your being so seldom seen that even the denizens of the Nine Hells themselves wouldn't touch it with a twenty-foot rusty halberd!  Have I MADE myself perfectly CLEAR?!

CHARNAME is a touchy bastard.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 30, 2012, 04:49:12 PM
Just now at work:

siobhan and eleni: (indistinct office chatter)
eleni: (indistinct) ... Kevin?
Me: hmmm?
Eleni: whats a booze that begins with a?
Me: :blink: absinthe
siobhan: oh jesus :lulz:
eleni: heres some absinthe dr. (redacted)! :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 30, 2012, 04:52:44 PM
Lol

siobhan: can you get absinthe for about $20?
Me: (what the hell is going on lol) uh... No probably not unless its czech knock off stuff.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 04, 2012, 10:34:05 PM
(http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/84/74746621.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on December 04, 2012, 10:39:36 PM
"Unquestionably the person that can get lowest down in cringing before royalty and nobility, and can get most satisfaction out of crawling on his belly before them, is an American. Not all Americans, but when an American does it he makes competition impossible. We have to be despised by somebody whom we regard as above us or we are not happy; we have to have somebody to worship and envy or we cannot be content. In America we manifest this in all the ancient and customary ways. In public we scoff at titles and hereditary privilege but privately we hanker after them, and when we get a chance we buy them for cash and a daughter."
-- Mark Twain
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 10:40:54 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 10:34:05 PM
(http://img43.imageshack.us/img43/3613/37060319.png)

Can't read it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 04, 2012, 10:44:23 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 04, 2012, 10:39:36 PM
"Unquestionably the person that can get lowest down in cringing before royalty and nobility, and can get most satisfaction out of crawling on his belly before them, is an American. Not all Americans, but when an American does it he makes competition impossible. We have to be despised by somebody whom we regard as above us or we are not happy; we have to have somebody to worship and envy or we cannot be content. In America we manifest this in all the ancient and customary ways. In public we scoff at titles and hereditary privilege but privately we hanker after them, and when we get a chance we buy them for cash and a daughter."
-- Mark Twain

I love a man who rips off his own work.   :lulz:

TGRR,
Worships the ground Mark Twain walked on.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 04, 2012, 10:59:12 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 10:40:54 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 10:34:05 PM
(http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/84/74746621.png)

Can't read it.
fixt
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:07:17 PM
Thanks!

That made my head hurt a bit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 04, 2012, 11:12:52 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:07:17 PM
Thanks!

That made my head hurt a bit.

I love the "it's ok because you can just drive your car, and it's being done to everyone equally."
Because EVERYONE drives a car, and that means they have no right to use anything their taxes paid for.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:49:47 PM
Actually the biggest asshole friends every musician in Boston, and then banned me and LMNO (as well as others) for continuing to poke at his teabuggery. Which was hilarious because he decided to do it to everyone on his friends list that he knew was liberal. I hadn't even bothered him in a few days, but he made big sweeping cuts.

It's all good though, I picked up some friends in the process.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 12:25:07 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 10:34:05 PM
http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/84/74746621.png

So the crazy person I was arguing with either deleted her comments, or my friend did, because now it's just me screaming into the void. :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 12:39:47 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:07 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 10:34:05 PM
http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/84/74746621.png

So the crazy person I was arguing with either deleted her comments, or my friend did, because now it's just me screaming into the void. :lulz:

:lulz: I love it when that happens! Especially when I addressed them by name in an earlier post, so it's obvious that they deleted their conversation in a fit of butthurt.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:41:10 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

Me too.

Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:39:47 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:07 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 10:34:05 PM
http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/84/74746621.png

So the crazy person I was arguing with either deleted her comments, or my friend did, because now it's just me screaming into the void. :lulz:

:lulz: I love it when that happens! Especially when I addressed them by name in an earlier post, so it's obvious that they deleted their conversation in a fit of butthurt.

Seconded! :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 01:02:19 AM
Adventure time!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

QUICK, TRY THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1WZoyUdlfE
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 02:03:44 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 01:02:19 AM
Adventure time!

Yay! Adventure!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 02:10:06 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

QUICK, TRY THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1WZoyUdlfE
Is not the same. I grew up listening to first English dubbing. The lady singing was actually singing, not some weird not singing the lady in the new English dub. All I can say is that Disney is full of terrible.

Coyote, doesn't give two shits about Stars Wars, pissed about an imported cartoon.
http://youtu.be/kafhe6Wke6M :argh!:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 02:10:49 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:03:44 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 01:02:19 AM
Adventure time!

Yay! Adventure!

May as well, Waffle Iron seems to be stuck in a temporal loop.  :lulz: :evil: :thanks RWHN- seriously though. Going to have a little fun with this to break the rut:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 02:11:29 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:10:06 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

QUICK, TRY THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1WZoyUdlfE
Is not the same. I grew up listening to first English dubbing. The lady singing was actually singing, not some weird not singing the lady in the new English dub. All I can say is that Disney is full of terrible.

Coyote, doesn't give two shits about Stars Wars, pissed about an imported cartoon.
http://youtu.be/kafhe6Wke6M :argh!:

I actually don't even know what this movie is....
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 02:14:56 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 02:11:29 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:10:06 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

QUICK, TRY THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1WZoyUdlfE
Is not the same. I grew up listening to first English dubbing. The lady singing was actually singing, not some weird not singing the lady in the new English dub. All I can say is that Disney is full of terrible.

Coyote, doesn't give two shits about Stars Wars, pissed about an imported cartoon.
http://youtu.be/kafhe6Wke6M :argh!:

I actually don't even know what this movie is....
You sad strange little shoemaker...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Neighbor_Totoro
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 02:16:19 AM
Also relevant.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pom_Poko
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 02:28:15 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:14:56 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 02:11:29 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:10:06 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

QUICK, TRY THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1WZoyUdlfE
Is not the same. I grew up listening to first English dubbing. The lady singing was actually singing, not some weird not singing the lady in the new English dub. All I can say is that Disney is full of terrible.

Coyote, doesn't give two shits about Stars Wars, pissed about an imported cartoon.
http://youtu.be/kafhe6Wke6M :argh!:

I actually don't even know what this movie is....
You sad strange little shoemaker...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Neighbor_Totoro

yep
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 02:30:08 AM
Oh, and the one on the left is the bottom of a right foot Doc Martin.

Twid,
Right foot will destroy your guarantee.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 02:37:55 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:10:06 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

QUICK, TRY THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1WZoyUdlfE
Is not the same. I grew up listening to first English dubbing. The lady singing was actually singing, not some weird not singing the lady in the new English dub. All I can say is that Disney is full of terrible.

Coyote, doesn't give two shits about Stars Wars, pissed about an imported cartoon.
http://youtu.be/kafhe6Wke6M :argh!:

Weird... I don't think I've ever heard that before, which is amazing considering how obsessed EFO was with Totoro. I think we must have had the subtitled version.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 02:44:33 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:37:55 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:10:06 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

QUICK, TRY THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1WZoyUdlfE
Is not the same. I grew up listening to first English dubbing. The lady singing was actually singing, not some weird not singing the lady in the new English dub. All I can say is that Disney is full of terrible.

Coyote, doesn't give two shits about Stars Wars, pissed about an imported cartoon.
http://youtu.be/kafhe6Wke6M :argh!:

Weird... I don't think I've ever heard that before, which is amazing considering how obsessed EFO was with Totoro. I think we must have had the subtitled version.

Now I need to borrow the VHS tape my mom has and convert it into a DVD.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 02:47:00 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:44:33 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:37:55 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:10:06 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:59:01 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:57:45 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 12:42:09 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:40:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 05, 2012, 12:01:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 04, 2012, 11:46:58 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 04, 2012, 11:37:53 PM
Quote from: FROTISTED FUDGE CAK on December 04, 2012, 11:29:15 PM
Twid, some of your FB friends are idiots and assholes, what gives? How is it that you have not badgered these people into unfriending you yet?

unless that is with regards with something else, that is actually a friend of a friend of mine, acting the fool.

In some cases it is a valid thing. Other times I imagine it's just catching them at a weird time. Aside from Green Abortions guy I can't think of anything particularly recent though.

Ohhhhh OK. I think I have my profile set so that only my friends can comment.

I am utterly confused by all of this.

So am I!

Oh no! How are we going to figure this out if all three of us are confused?

We'll have to go on an ADVENTURE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgEeBzsFggs

OH FUCKING BALLS!!! GOD DAMN YOU DISNEY!!!! FUCKING UP MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

QUICK, TRY THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1WZoyUdlfE
Is not the same. I grew up listening to first English dubbing. The lady singing was actually singing, not some weird not singing the lady in the new English dub. All I can say is that Disney is full of terrible.

Coyote, doesn't give two shits about Stars Wars, pissed about an imported cartoon.
http://youtu.be/kafhe6Wke6M :argh!:

Weird... I don't think I've ever heard that before, which is amazing considering how obsessed EFO was with Totoro. I think we must have had the subtitled version.

Now I need to borrow the VHS tape my mom has and convert it into a DVD.

If you can do that, please let me know how.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 02:54:13 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.

How much do they charge you?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Aucoq on December 05, 2012, 06:28:01 AM
You guys are lucky.  Everything here is so spread out that you can't walk anywhere without expecting it to take over an hour or two to get there.  :sad:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 06:29:33 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.

Indeed. We should all get together for a Coke commercial. It is December, after all.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 06:30:57 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:29:33 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.

Indeed. We should all get together for a Coke commercial. It is December, after all.

Now I proceed to drink a beverage with myself.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 06:34:20 AM
Quote from: holιst on December 05, 2012, 06:28:01 AM
You guys are lucky.  Everything here is so spread out that you can't walk anywhere without expecting it to take over an hour or two to get there.  :sad:

That is a pity.

You must be on one of the crappier icebergs.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 06:35:10 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:30:57 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:29:33 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.

Indeed. We should all get together for a Coke commercial. It is December, after all.

Now I proceed to drink a beverage with myself.

To the refrigerator!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 06:36:22 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:35:10 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:30:57 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:29:33 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.

Indeed. We should all get together for a Coke commercial. It is December, after all.

Now I proceed to drink a beverage with myself.

To the refrigerator!
You mean outside?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 06:37:06 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:30:57 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:29:33 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.

Indeed. We should all get together for a Coke commercial. It is December, after all.

Now I proceed to drink a beverage with myself.

If I could buy the world a Coke!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 06:37:16 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:36:22 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:35:10 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:30:57 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:29:33 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.

Indeed. We should all get together for a Coke commercial. It is December, after all.

Now I proceed to drink a beverage with myself.

To the refrigerator!
You mean outside?

Yes.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 06:37:34 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:36:22 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:35:10 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:30:57 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:29:33 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.

Indeed. We should all get together for a Coke commercial. It is December, after all.

Now I proceed to drink a beverage with myself.

To the refrigerator!
You mean outside?

Yes! To the snowbank.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 05, 2012, 06:38:06 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:37:16 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:36:22 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:35:10 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:30:57 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:29:33 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:28:16 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:26:55 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:26:15 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:24:27 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:22:57 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:20:23 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:19:45 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 06:15:19 AM
Quote from: ho|ist on December 05, 2012, 06:14:27 AM
Quote from: holist~ on December 05, 2012, 06:09:50 AM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 02:51:22 AM
There's a place half a mile away that does it.
I think there might be a place in the mall near me, too.

They have malls out by you?
Oddly enough, the mall is half a mile away from me...

That's curious, that's about how close mine is too.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Neither do I. I imagine that the nearest mall from me is also a half a mile.

That seems to be the optimal placement.

Haha, get it, optimal(l) placement? Opti-mall?

There is some sort of hidden truth here.

I am a wise old bear.

Indeed. We should all get together for a Coke commercial. It is December, after all.

Now I proceed to drink a beverage with myself.

To the refrigerator!
You mean outside?

Yes.

Or maybe the igloo.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Dildo Argentino on December 05, 2012, 08:36:24 AM
Wowzers, I was having this much fun and didn't notice it!

Not surprising, really.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Dildo Argentino on December 05, 2012, 09:09:01 AM
I'm about 4 miles from the nearest mall... and I don't have a car. I can cycle it in under 20 minutes, though.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 05:50:38 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 04, 2012, 10:39:36 PM
"Unquestionably the person that can get lowest down in cringing before royalty and nobility, and can get most satisfaction out of crawling on his belly before them, is an American. Not all Americans, but when an American does it he makes competition impossible. We have to be despised by somebody whom we regard as above us or we are not happy; we have to have somebody to worship and envy or we cannot be content. In America we manifest this in all the ancient and customary ways. In public we scoff at titles and hereditary privilege but privately we hanker after them, and when we get a chance we buy them for cash and a daughter."
-- Mark Twain

Sometimes an ordained minister sets out to be blasphemous. When this happens, the layman is out of the running; he stands no chance.
- Also Mark Twain
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on December 05, 2012, 07:53:18 PM
:lulz: I see.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 09:34:41 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 05, 2012, 07:53:18 PM
:lulz: I see.

Mark Twain is the fucking MASTER, the GREAT-GREAT-GRAND-DADDY and GODFATHER of ranting.  Everyone since - Lord Buckley, Lenny Bruce, HL Mencken, HST, Warren Ellis, Stang, everyone - has derived from Twain.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on December 05, 2012, 09:40:30 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 09:34:41 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 05, 2012, 07:53:18 PM
:lulz: I see.


Mark Twain is the fucking MASTER, the GREAT-GREAT-GRAND-DADDY and GODFATHER of ranting.  Everyone since - Lord Buckley, Lenny Bruce, HL Mencken, HST, Warren Ellis, Stang, everyone - has derived from Twain.


I wonder if that is at some level partly responsible for censoring or removing Twain's works from schools.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 09:52:36 PM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 09:40:30 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 09:34:41 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 05, 2012, 07:53:18 PM
:lulz: I see.


Mark Twain is the fucking MASTER, the GREAT-GREAT-GRAND-DADDY and GODFATHER of ranting.  Everyone since - Lord Buckley, Lenny Bruce, HL Mencken, HST, Warren Ellis, Stang, everyone - has derived from Twain.


I wonder if that is at some level partly responsible for censoring or removing Twain's works from schools.

No, that is the left-winger set that want to purge our libraries of anything considered a slur by TODAY'S standard.  And Twain DOES in fact use the terms "Injun" and "Nigger"...Which he himself thought were kind of dumb, but where ACCURATE REPRESENTATIONS OF THE SPEECH COMMONLY USED AT HIS TIME.

But, hey, destroying all accurate records or representations of bad things in history can't have any negative reprecussions, can it?  Of course not.  If the kids don't SEE the word, it can't hurt them (as opposed to seeing the word and being taught why it was bad and why it happened or anything), right?

Pigfucking censorship assholes.  I hate their as much as I hate the teabagger's ideology of thinking that the words themselves are acceptable in common use in this day and age, because BOTH OF THEM ARE DUMB.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Aucoq on December 05, 2012, 10:46:46 PM
I've always respected Twain as a giant in the American literature world, but I never realized he was such a badass.  I think I'm going to have fun researching him some more and reading more of his works.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 05, 2012, 10:49:16 PM
Puddinhead wilson, man. Great shit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on December 05, 2012, 10:49:32 PM
Letters From The Earth saved me from, well, being Saved.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 11:22:17 PM
Wikipedia has a bunch of his shit now that it's public domain, including some of his newspaper and magazine articles.

To The Man Standing In Darkness is the best essay ever written.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on December 05, 2012, 11:34:05 PM
The Mysterious Stranger is one of my all-time favorites by him.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 09:52:36 PM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 09:40:30 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 09:34:41 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 05, 2012, 07:53:18 PM
:lulz: I see.


Mark Twain is the fucking MASTER, the GREAT-GREAT-GRAND-DADDY and GODFATHER of ranting.  Everyone since - Lord Buckley, Lenny Bruce, HL Mencken, HST, Warren Ellis, Stang, everyone - has derived from Twain.


I wonder if that is at some level partly responsible for censoring or removing Twain's works from schools.

No, that is the left-winger set that want to purge our libraries of anything considered a slur by TODAY'S standard.  And Twain DOES in fact use the terms "Injun" and "Nigger"...Which he himself thought were kind of dumb, but where ACCURATE REPRESENTATIONS OF THE SPEECH COMMONLY USED AT HIS TIME.

But, hey, destroying all accurate records or representations of bad things in history can't have any negative reprecussions, can it?  Of course not.  If the kids don't SEE the word, it can't hurt them (as opposed to seeing the word and being taught why it was bad and why it happened or anything), right?

Pigfucking censorship assholes.  I hate their as much as I hate the teabagger's ideology of thinking that the words themselves are acceptable in common use in this day and age, because BOTH OF THEM ARE DUMB.
Oh, the Right is just as bad. They got Shel Silverstein's book, Where the Sidewalk Ends removed from a library in Pennsylvania because they argued it encouraged cannibalism (and, uh, that guy was a staple of my childhood reading lists). They're also responsible for why so much American history is not taught or taught properly in schools.
Bowdlerization from either the Right or the Left is not the answer to objectionable content. Explaining the context and the history of the words/concepts is, as I'm sure I don't have to tell anyone here. There's a good book on this, Roger, called The Language Police: How Pressure Groups Restrict What Students Learn, by Diana Ravitch. You might like it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 11:38:18 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 05, 2012, 11:34:05 PM
The Mysterious Stranger is one of my all-time favorites by him.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 09:52:36 PM
Quote from: H0list on December 05, 2012, 09:40:30 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 09:34:41 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on December 05, 2012, 07:53:18 PM
:lulz: I see.


Mark Twain is the fucking MASTER, the GREAT-GREAT-GRAND-DADDY and GODFATHER of ranting.  Everyone since - Lord Buckley, Lenny Bruce, HL Mencken, HST, Warren Ellis, Stang, everyone - has derived from Twain.


I wonder if that is at some level partly responsible for censoring or removing Twain's works from schools.

No, that is the left-winger set that want to purge our libraries of anything considered a slur by TODAY'S standard.  And Twain DOES in fact use the terms "Injun" and "Nigger"...Which he himself thought were kind of dumb, but where ACCURATE REPRESENTATIONS OF THE SPEECH COMMONLY USED AT HIS TIME.

But, hey, destroying all accurate records or representations of bad things in history can't have any negative reprecussions, can it?  Of course not.  If the kids don't SEE the word, it can't hurt them (as opposed to seeing the word and being taught why it was bad and why it happened or anything), right?

Pigfucking censorship assholes.  I hate their as much as I hate the teabagger's ideology of thinking that the words themselves are acceptable in common use in this day and age, because BOTH OF THEM ARE DUMB.
Oh, the Right is just as bad.

Think I said that.

QuoteThey got Shel Silverstein's book, Where the Sidewalk Ends removed from a library in Pennsylvania because they argued it encouraged cannibalism (and, uh, that guy was a staple of my childhood reading lists). They're also responsible for why so much American history is not taught or taught properly in schools.

The left is also guilty on the history thing.

QuoteBowdlerization from either the Right or the Left is not the answer to objectionable content. Explaining the context and the history of the words/concepts is, as I'm sure I don't have to tell anyone here. There's a good book on this, Roger, called The Language Police: How Pressure Groups Restrict What Students Learn, by Diana Ravitch. You might like it.

I'll have to look it up.  Censorship in almost any form gets up my ass.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Aucoq on December 05, 2012, 11:38:48 PM
The sad thing is I bet if you asked people about Twain the only answer you'd get from most of them would involve the Huck Finn controversy (unfortunately, myself included).  Most people were never taught about the incredible person behind the books (again, unfortunately, myself included).  What does it say about our society/culture that we've boiled such a powerful, creative, witty individual into just another controversy to fight over?

With that said, I'm definitely going to read Puddinhead, Letters from the Earth, To The Man Standing In Darkness, and The Mysterious Stranger.  Those are moving to the top of my reading list.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 05, 2012, 11:42:04 PM
QuoteWhat does it say about our society/culture that we've boiled such a powerful, creative, witty individual into just another controversy to fight over?

That Texas has too much say over the American education system.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Juana on December 05, 2012, 11:44:03 PM
Quote from: Cain on December 05, 2012, 11:42:04 PM
QuoteWhat does it say about our society/culture that we've boiled such a powerful, creative, witty individual into just another controversy to fight over?

That Texas has too much say over the American education system.
THIS.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 11:49:53 PM
Quote from: Cain on December 05, 2012, 11:42:04 PM
QuoteWhat does it say about our society/culture that we've boiled such a powerful, creative, witty individual into just another controversy to fight over?

That Texas has too much say over the American education system.

That's the fun part about Jefferson.

Up to 1990:  Everyone loves Thomas Jefferson.

1990 or so:  The left suddenly hates Jefferson, because he owned slaves, the right calls the left a bunch of America-hating hippies.

2001: The right suddenly hates Jefferson, because he was against indefinite detention and torture, and for public education (way before it actually happened.  The Left calls them America-hating fascists, then starts arguing amongst themselves over the "having sex with his slaves" thing.  The right laughs at them, and then decides to show them a thing or two by taking Jefferson out of Texas schoolbooks and replacing him with John Calvin (founder of Calvinism, for those of you who don't understand weird fucking Americans), and mortal enemy of Thomas Jefferson.

Current Day:  Everyone pretends that 1990 to 2008 never happened.  Saying Jefferson's name at a party gets a long silence and dirty looks from everyone.

Doktor's diagnosis:  People are dumb, and believe that humans come in pure varieties (exception for RWHN, obviously), and will kill anyone who shows feet of clay, in public or otherwise.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Richter on December 06, 2012, 03:16:56 AM
Richter - ::Response to the potential "augementation" of the punch for the work holiday thing::  - I don't do any of my drinking at work.  I find it unprofessional and inefficient.  No, I do all my drinking in the car on the way here."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on December 06, 2012, 04:11:41 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 05, 2012, 11:49:53 PM
Quote from: Cain on December 05, 2012, 11:42:04 PM
QuoteWhat does it say about our society/culture that we've boiled such a powerful, creative, witty individual into just another controversy to fight over?

That Texas has too much say over the American education system.

That's the fun part about Jefferson.

Up to 1990:  Everyone loves Thomas Jefferson.

1990 or so:  The left suddenly hates Jefferson, because he owned slaves, the right calls the left a bunch of America-hating hippies.

2001: The right suddenly hates Jefferson, because he was against indefinite detention and torture, and for public education (way before it actually happened.  The Left calls them America-hating fascists, then starts arguing amongst themselves over the "having sex with his slaves" thing.  The right laughs at them, and then decides to show them a thing or two by taking Jefferson out of Texas schoolbooks and replacing him with John Calvin (founder of Calvinism, for those of you who don't understand weird fucking Americans), and mortal enemy of Thomas Jefferson.

Current Day:  Everyone pretends that 1990 to 2008 never happened.  Saying Jefferson's name at a party gets a long silence and dirty looks from everyone.

Doktor's diagnosis:  People are dumb, and believe that humans come in pure varieties (exception for RWHN, obviously), and will kill anyone who shows feet of clay, in public or otherwise.

Stolen and credited.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 07, 2012, 03:15:30 PM
From a review of Skyfall I am reading:

QuoteThe key dilemma for any Bond movie is finding a plausible, crowd-pleasing mission for a heartless government assassin that doesn't make him look like a thug or recreational terrorist or scab taking work away from the CIA and Mossad.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on December 07, 2012, 05:17:09 PM
Quote from: Cain on December 07, 2012, 03:15:30 PM
From a review of Skyfall I am reading:

QuoteThe key dilemma for any Bond movie is finding a plausible, crowd-pleasing mission for a heartless government assassin that doesn't make him look like a thug or recreational terrorist or scab taking work away from the CIA and Mossad.

:lulz: Damn!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 26, 2012, 07:49:26 PM
From yesterday:

nana: i like going back to the good ole days.
Me: do you do a lot of time traveling then?
Nana (smirking): yeah.

Me explaining schroedingers cat to uncle: :pause: you know the universe is weird. I sound like im spouting a load of bullshit right now.

Nanas senility also flared up a little.

Nana: whos over there?
Kathy: kevin bob and villager (both villager and my sister have the same name. Villager is being referenced here)
nana: :?
Kathy: theres two (villagers name) ma.
Nana: clearly
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on December 28, 2012, 11:37:19 PM
Oh, Omegle.
QuoteStranger: how big are your melons

You: They're pretty huge, man. I'm really struggling to find something that can keep them in place.

You: My fridge is packed.

Stranger: waiiitttt a minuteee

Stranger: why are you boobs in your fridge?

You: I thought you said melons?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 28, 2012, 11:48:56 PM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on December 28, 2012, 11:52:06 PM
Some FBDisco-disco-disco-baby RE: Eris:

QuoteOne war doesn't make someone a war goddess.

That puts so many apologists to shams it's hard to look at.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 29, 2012, 09:23:43 AM
Equally, one war crime doesn't make one a war criminal.
\
(http://abovethelaw.com/uploads/2012/03/matthews-leno-cheney.jpg)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on December 29, 2012, 09:32:43 AM
:spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 29, 2012, 10:04:17 AM
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 26, 2012, 07:49:26 PM
From yesterday:

nana: i like going back to the good ole days.
Me: do you do a lot of time traveling then?
Nana (smirking): yeah.

Me explaining schroedingers cat to uncle: :pause: you know the universe is weird. I sound like im spouting a load of bullshit right now.

Nanas senility also flared up a little.

Nana: whos over there?
Kathy: kevin bob and villager (both villager and my sister have the same name. Villager is being referenced here)
nana: :?
Kathy: theres two (villagers name) ma.
Nana: clearly

I also don't want to make light of nana's dementia.

But sometimes you have to mock the old to..... maintain sanity.

We never want to be there do we?

Sometimes, I think that Nana is better off....
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 31, 2012, 07:23:37 AM
A: J says he wants something fatty and salty.
R: Tell him I'll put my sweaty balls on his neck.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 31, 2012, 08:21:30 AM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on January 23, 2013, 03:05:54 AM

Burning coal for energy is barely more efficient than lighting your face on fire to poach an egg in your mouth.



Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-8-greatest-wars-ever-fought-by-fox-news/#ixzz2IlReXMGt (http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-8-greatest-wars-ever-fought-by-fox-news/#ixzz2IlReXMGt)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 23, 2013, 03:56:12 AM
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 23, 2013, 03:05:54 AM

Burning coal for energy is barely more efficient than lighting your face on fire to poach an egg in your mouth.



Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-8-greatest-wars-ever-fought-by-fox-news/#ixzz2IlReXMGt (http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-8-greatest-wars-ever-fought-by-fox-news/#ixzz2IlReXMGt)

Burning coal is worse than that, really.  It's filthy stuff if burned "raw", releases all sorts of horrible shit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on February 05, 2013, 01:29:17 AM
"I just saw a fat midget riding a Great Dane through the parking lot.".
- Sister Gothique.

Welcome back to Tucson, Lady.   :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on February 05, 2013, 05:03:27 AM
Me: "Mom, I gotta go to a Christening on Saturday. What's a nice gift? It's a little girl."

Mom: "Okay, crap. Well...whatever you do, don't take communion, and don't get all pissy at the priest when he goes on a pro-life rant during the homily. You know how they are at these sort of things. Give the kid a rosary to hang in the bedroom and don't go crazy on the open bar. If there IS no open bar, drink water. We don't want these people thinking you're actually Catholic."

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on February 05, 2013, 05:04:43 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on February 05, 2013, 04:25:49 PM
That's my mom...the Irish Protestant.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mangrove on February 11, 2013, 02:31:49 AM
[explaining the paperwork I had to fill in for my new part-time gig]

Me: So, they took a copy of my green card and my social security.
Mrs Mang: Why did they want your SS?
Me: To prove I am legal to work here.
Mrs Mang: THEY TOOK OUR JOBZ!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on February 14, 2013, 07:37:16 PM
Just came up with this on another forum and was quite pleased with it as a one liner

QuoteIf religion is "the opiate of the masses" then democracy is like really low grade speed cut with broken glass and dog worming tablets.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on February 14, 2013, 07:46:16 PM
Wait, there is a forum you can discuss politics on and you haven't been banned yet?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on February 14, 2013, 07:47:39 PM
Gimme time. The night's still young  :evil:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on February 14, 2013, 07:48:56 PM
If you want help, well, after 22:00 tonight I won't be doing anything except playing medic to noobs who can't shoot straight.

Fucking noobs.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on February 14, 2013, 07:50:18 PM
Nah, mate. I like this forum. Was just a wisecrack. STAND DOWN SOLDIER!! :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on February 14, 2013, 07:55:00 PM
 :sad:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: insideout on February 14, 2013, 08:15:14 PM
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 23, 2013, 03:05:54 AM

Burning coal for energy is barely more efficient than lighting your face on fire to poach an egg in your mouth.



Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-8-greatest-wars-ever-fought-by-fox-news/#ixzz2IlReXMGt (http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-8-greatest-wars-ever-fought-by-fox-news/#ixzz2IlReXMGt)
my employer's firewall blocks cracked.com under the category "tasteless".

In what way does it help me be more productive to be banned from looking at tasteless shit?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on February 15, 2013, 05:43:12 AM
From Facebook:

Pretty cool high school acquaintance: ‎"Love fades away but things are forever." - Tom Haverford

Twid: Unless you consider time to be a sequence of points along the spacetime continuum. Then love is a permanent, but bounded line segment, much as a city or a planet is finite in 4 dimensions. This is not to be crass and pedantic in one go, but to legitimately respond to the quote. Well, visually, probably more like two silly straws that intersect at multiple points. <--there's the crass and pedantic  :)
   
Twid: Hopefully that was worth a chuckle, at least.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on February 20, 2013, 11:36:15 PM
Me and the cousin, via text:

Purple Fraggle: Sorry I didn't make it today. Seeing people yesterday was a lot and I have been up since 3 in the morning.
Twid: Its cool. It wasnt an easy day. i kinda feel like being alone and behind a computer anyway. Well carch up again soon now that i know where your watering hole is
Twid: Also daniel came last night hes the gay vocalist. He wanted to find out whole richie was and grope him until he saw who it was. Tho he did say mike h (Twid note- Richie's son) is hot lol.
Purple Fraggle: Wine snorts hurt
Twid: QUOTE OF THE NIGHT!
Purple Fraggle: It was very cold chardonnay, too.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: purplefraggle on February 21, 2013, 12:49:11 AM
The more I think about it, it was more of a chardonanny slushie. I put the big bottle my friend left for me in the freezer.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on February 21, 2013, 01:12:33 AM
Quote from: purplefraggle on February 21, 2013, 12:49:11 AM
The more I think about it, it was more of a chardonanny slushie. I put the big bottle my friend left for me in the freezer.

:)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: purplefraggle on February 21, 2013, 01:21:00 AM
Laugh all you want, Twidcousin. Someday, you, too will suffer a wine slushie headache.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on February 21, 2013, 01:48:20 AM
Quote from: purplefraggle on February 21, 2013, 01:21:00 AM
Laugh all you want, Twidcousin. Someday, you, too will suffer a wine slushie headache.

I don't doubt it. But that was a smiley for "cool, purplefraggle is here"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: AFK on March 12, 2013, 10:48:46 PM
From one of today's Cracked articles:



The fry holder is about 15 cents' worth of polymer despair, an ennui that transcends man as a species and floats above us all like a layer of Chinese smog, thick with disdain and stupidity, creeping into our homes through cracks and crevices as we sleep until we breathe it in and get ever so slightly dumber as a result until the day comes when the last person who remembers long division wakes up and just decides to put racing stripes on their underpants and run head first into a wall in what will be a concussion-inducing eulogy to common sense as we all become utterly, irreversibly fucktarded.



Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-new-products-that-prove-humanity-doomed_p2/#ixzz2NMud4BCV (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-new-products-that-prove-humanity-doomed_p2/#ixzz2NMud4BCV)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on March 28, 2013, 07:05:35 PM
"Oslo Central Station: Woman pours half her orange juice out on the floor and mixes the rest with methylated spirit. Merry easter!" - my older sister.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 28, 2013, 07:07:58 PM
Quote from: If You Talk Too Much My Head Will Explode on March 12, 2013, 10:48:46 PM
From one of today's Cracked articles:



The fry holder is about 15 cents' worth of polymer despair, an ennui that transcends man as a species and floats above us all like a layer of Chinese smog, thick with disdain and stupidity, creeping into our homes through cracks and crevices as we sleep until we breathe it in and get ever so slightly dumber as a result until the day comes when the last person who remembers long division wakes up and just decides to put racing stripes on their underpants and run head first into a wall in what will be a concussion-inducing eulogy to common sense as we all become utterly, irreversibly fucktarded.



Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-new-products-that-prove-humanity-doomed_p2/#ixzz2NMud4BCV (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-new-products-that-prove-humanity-doomed_p2/#ixzz2NMud4BCV)

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 28, 2013, 07:49:22 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 28, 2013, 07:07:58 PM
Quote from: If You Talk Too Much My Head Will Explode on March 12, 2013, 10:48:46 PM
From one of today's Cracked articles:



The fry holder is about 15 cents' worth of polymer despair, an ennui that transcends man as a species and floats above us all like a layer of Chinese smog, thick with disdain and stupidity, creeping into our homes through cracks and crevices as we sleep until we breathe it in and get ever so slightly dumber as a result until the day comes when the last person who remembers long division wakes up and just decides to put racing stripes on their underpants and run head first into a wall in what will be a concussion-inducing eulogy to common sense as we all become utterly, irreversibly fucktarded.



Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-new-products-that-prove-humanity-doomed_p2/#ixzz2NMud4BCV (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-new-products-that-prove-humanity-doomed_p2/#ixzz2NMud4BCV)

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:

That was AMAZING!  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 28, 2013, 07:54:17 PM
OH MY GOD. Found through the link on that article:

http://www.monkeyhelpers.org/

SERVICE MONKEYS!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on March 28, 2013, 08:32:40 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on March 28, 2013, 07:54:17 PM
OH MY GOD. Found through the link on that article:

http://www.monkeyhelpers.org/

SERVICE MONKEYS!

D'AWWWWW!

Genius!

If they can be trained not to fling poo.

Also, in some situations, if they can't.  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on March 29, 2013, 07:28:49 AM
"My other car is a tiny penis."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on April 23, 2013, 06:15:27 PM
From my people, in no order, I hate you people for not being closer to me.

"I'm pretty sure Jesus was an alien."

"Your body is made out of what? Smaller. Smaller. Smaller. Right. Atoms. And what are they? Light. We're just made out of light, so I believe one day we can go faster than the speed of light, because we are the same stuff."

*bartstool inserted*

"Yeah, but see this glass? I should be able to move the molecules around my molecules and pass safely through the glass. One day I WILL be able to do that."

Uh, can I haz intertia?

Apparently i canz not.

I just want someone to talk to, really.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on April 23, 2013, 06:35:44 PM
Doesn't that imply that light can also travel faster than the speed of light?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on April 23, 2013, 06:38:36 PM
Quote from: Cain on April 23, 2013, 06:35:44 PM
Doesn't that imply that light can also travel faster than the speed of light?

Yes, he actually started saying that when I suggested that IF there were some kind of divine force (whatever the fuck that means) in the universe it probably set these unbreakable rules of physics, such as the speed of light. Then it was molecules this, magic Jesus that.

I did end up suggesting that we go find a 7 story building to test his ideas.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on April 23, 2013, 06:47:04 PM
I try to have understanding about the poor education system, and certainly this guy is its product. Every time I come over, and trust me when i say I must do so, it's One World Order, God Created Races And Intended Them To Be Seperate, I Totally Know How To Create *removed because NSA*, It Is Your Duty To Take Out Your Government If They Disrupt Your Freedom.

Which pissed me right the fuck off. I pulled back my sleeves and showed him my arms.

"Do you see this? It says Give Me Freedom Or Kill Me, not Give Me Freedom Or Kill Them."

This is not too difficult to understand, yes? You keep them from taking life, you don't take life to keep your freedom, unless that freedom is you actual MOTHERFUCKING LIFE. Or that of another.

Anyway, this guy does not have an abnormal brain, AFAIK. He can reason, he's just all mixed up, and there's no unmixing that shit. Once certain chemicals have settled and the brain's been etched is there a way to well and truly reverse that shit? Without breaking the person? Is being broken down preferable? I would say so.

Yeah, lightspeed, you can get passed it since you are atoms.

:slowclap:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Junkenstein on April 23, 2013, 06:52:56 PM
Remind me to tell you about the infinite energy box made from LED's and solar panels.

My people have been special today too.

Back later, just going to scream underwater for a while
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on April 23, 2013, 07:09:10 PM
This is why I avoid conversations with people.

And never go on Facebook anymore.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on April 23, 2013, 08:16:03 PM
It's not good enough. They have to PAY for this. Someone has to PAY.

I'm just glad I'm not dealing with it by myself.

:awesome:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on April 23, 2013, 08:28:20 PM
I just got completely exhausted trolling facebook after this last election. There's just no way to keep up. We would have to have teams working in shifts and it STILL wouldn't be enough to make a dent in that wall of dumb that is FB.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on April 23, 2013, 08:49:36 PM
Quote from: Alty on April 23, 2013, 08:28:20 PM
I just got completely exhausted trolling facebook after this last election. There's just no way to keep up. We would have to have teams working in shifts and it STILL wouldn't be enough to make a dent in that wall of dumb that is FB.

Burn it down, baby.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on April 24, 2013, 11:30:08 AM
My Norwegian exam essay today got terribly polemical:
(translated)
"And where are the children in the middle of all this? They sit at home, watching pedagogically correct television shows made by grown-ups. They sit inside storage boxes euphemistically named "kindergarten" and "school", where they are passively fed the knowledge of the grown-up world. Prison, I think we should call it. Or concentration camps. Luckily, you won't get killed, but in return you'll end up an unspontaneous and thoroughly dull adult with absolutely no sense of imagination or creativity. Congratulations, you are now a "responsible citizen", as in "no threat to the status quo"."

"We see all the time how children are regarded with suspicion. In the news we hear about kids as young as 12 using alcohol and illegal drugs, watching violent movies and visiting pornographic websites. This is things adults do all the time. But kids have to be controlled, they need to be kept on a leash like pet dogs until they reach a certain age. That kids do these things is not really that strange. The adults have turned "adulthood" into something unattainable that children are still told to prepare for, a state of unrestricted power and freedom, but which they won't achieve before they've reached an arbitrarily decided age. This turns the adult world into an irresistible attraction. For kids everything becomes a competition to grow up first, and many turn into obnoxious, precocious youth politicians and student council leaders. But for them, the power of the grown-ups is impossible to attain, so instead they have to console themselves with the mythical consumer goods of the adult world: Booze, drugs, pills, porn and violent movies."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 24, 2013, 03:33:18 PM
Yeah, it's been interesting dealing with other parents who seem to view anyone under 18 as incapable and needing to be controlled.

My view is more that this time in between 12 and 18 is when they have a chance to try adult things out with a parental safety net firmly underneath them. They can venture into the adult world, and when it's overwhelming or scary or they make a mistake, they still get to retreat back into childhood for a while.

Being a teenager is when you get to practice being an adult, so that by the time you actually are an adult you can do it with no handlebars.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 24, 2013, 03:34:46 PM
My 13-year-old son is more mature and capable than most adults I know.

But then, he was kind of born a 30-year-old lawyer.

He thinks I'm silly.  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on April 24, 2013, 05:28:59 PM
Guy on typically mind numbing, spirit crushing gameshow that's on teevee in the background when asked what a pair of crossed swords on an OS map represents.

"A Jousting arena"

:eek:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 25, 2013, 02:00:53 AM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on April 24, 2013, 05:28:59 PM
Guy on typically mind numbing, spirit crushing gameshow that's on teevee in the background when asked what a pair of crossed swords on an OS map represents.

"A Jousting arena"

:eek:

What is an OS map, and what do the swords mean?

Is this something I ought to know about?

Are you from an alternate universe?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on April 25, 2013, 12:21:31 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 25, 2013, 02:00:53 AM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on April 24, 2013, 05:28:59 PM
Guy on typically mind numbing, spirit crushing gameshow that's on teevee in the background when asked what a pair of crossed swords on an OS map represents.

"A Jousting arena"

:eek:

What is an OS map, and what do the swords mean?

Is this something I ought to know about?

Are you from an alternate universe?
OS stands for operating system, so it is a map of the bits and sprites that run your computer.
The crossed swords are a symboligraphic representation of the old "Here be Dragons"
Also known as BIOS. They use the old symbol for 'unknown, but dangerous'  because BIOS problems equal get a new computer. Nobody knows what it does or how it got in there, but fiddling with it sinks your explorer. Just like in the old sailing days, when ships that went to Here Be Dragons just never returned.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Junkenstein on April 25, 2013, 01:06:52 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 25, 2013, 02:00:53 AM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on April 24, 2013, 05:28:59 PM
Guy on typically mind numbing, spirit crushing gameshow that's on teevee in the background when asked what a pair of crossed swords on an OS map represents.

"A Jousting arena"

:eek:

What is an OS map, and what do the swords mean?

Is this something I ought to know about?

Are you from an alternate universe?

OS Maps are Orchestrated scuffling Map. Crossed swords denotes an ancient duelling spots. Antique weapons are frequently found in such places. They are used in the UK today to arrange gang fights and select dogging locations.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Forsooth on April 26, 2013, 07:43:55 PM
a few quotes that i found amongst some old papers


"Nothing has to be true, but everything has to sound like it was."
"It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety."
"Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent."


-Salvor Hardin, from Isaac Asimov's Foundation series
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 26, 2013, 07:57:03 PM
Quote from: Alty on April 23, 2013, 06:47:04 PM
I try to have understanding about the poor education system, and certainly this guy is its product. Every time I come over, and trust me when i say I must do so, it's One World Order, God Created Races And Intended Them To Be Seperate, I Totally Know How To Create *removed because NSA*, It Is Your Duty To Take Out Your Government If They Disrupt Your Freedom.

Which pissed me right the fuck off. I pulled back my sleeves and showed him my arms.

"Do you see this? It says Give Me Freedom Or Kill Me, not Give Me Freedom Or Kill Them."

This is not too difficult to understand, yes? You keep them from taking life, you don't take life to keep your freedom, unless that freedom is you actual MOTHERFUCKING LIFE. Or that of another.

Anyway, this guy does not have an abnormal brain, AFAIK. He can reason, he's just all mixed up, and there's no unmixing that shit. Once certain chemicals have settled and the brain's been etched is there a way to well and truly reverse that shit? Without breaking the person? Is being broken down preferable? I would say so.

Yeah, lightspeed, you can get passed it since you are atoms.

:slowclap:

Overused, cliche, but totally appropriate here :mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pope Pixie Pickle on April 27, 2013, 04:12:48 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 25, 2013, 02:00:53 AM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on April 24, 2013, 05:28:59 PM
Guy on typically mind numbing, spirit crushing gameshow that's on teevee in the background when asked what a pair of crossed swords on an OS map represents.

"A Jousting arena"

:eek:

What is an OS map, and what do the swords mean?

Is this something I ought to know about?

Are you from an alternate universe?

OS = Ordnance Survey, the UK's official civil service mapping department.. Based in Southampton, actually.

I have no idea what the crossed swords are. I suspect it's old battle sites.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pope Pixie Pickle on April 27, 2013, 04:14:22 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 24, 2013, 03:34:46 PM
My 13-year-old son is more mature and capable than most adults I know.

But then, he was kind of born a 30-year-old lawyer.

He thinks I'm silly.  :lol:
:lulz:

I kind of love serious sensible teenagers.

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on April 27, 2013, 04:15:07 PM
Yes, they represent battlefields.  And the Battle of Aylesbury (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1404752/Town-at-war-over-historic-battle-that-never-was.html).
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 27, 2013, 06:06:53 PM
Quote from: Pixie on April 27, 2013, 04:14:22 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 24, 2013, 03:34:46 PM
My 13-year-old son is more mature and capable than most adults I know.

But then, he was kind of born a 30-year-old lawyer.

He thinks I'm silly.  :lol:
:lulz:

I kind of love serious sensible teenagers.

Yes, it's pretty great. :lulz: Also he's really nice to me because he thinks I'm slightly simple.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 27, 2013, 06:08:25 PM
Quote from: Pixie on April 27, 2013, 04:12:48 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 25, 2013, 02:00:53 AM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on April 24, 2013, 05:28:59 PM
Guy on typically mind numbing, spirit crushing gameshow that's on teevee in the background when asked what a pair of crossed swords on an OS map represents.

"A Jousting arena"

:eek:

What is an OS map, and what do the swords mean?

Is this something I ought to know about?

Are you from an alternate universe?

OS = Ordnance Survey, the UK's official civil service mapping department.. Based in Southampton, actually.

I have no idea what the crossed swords are. I suspect it's old battle sites.

Quote from: Cain on April 27, 2013, 04:15:07 PM
Yes, they represent battlefields.  And the Battle of Aylesbury (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1404752/Town-at-war-over-historic-battle-that-never-was.html).

Ah, thank you!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 30, 2013, 09:37:22 PM
"I would like to pay tribute to those who buggered off when Rome burned, who
ran away from the Huns, who played lame during the Crusades, who gave lip
service to the Church during the Inquisition, who stole the fare to be the
first on the expatriate ships to America, and who survived long enough to
get a load of pussy and make me possible, telling you this today."

- Alliekat, CotSG
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on May 08, 2013, 06:50:40 AM
An exchange a few minutes ago on Facebook, between myself [normal text] and my token Dominican ladyfriend [italicized], concerning the cover photo of Twid's Facebook profile:

Quote

Dude
Look at your friends cover photo
Lmfao
Lmfao Lmfao


yeah he's a fucking bad ass
so what

Look at the ppl in the cover photo
Lmfao Lmfao Lmfao


yeah, and? every single one of those bad motherfuckers will legitimately fuck your shit sideways sixteen times before breakfast, and ask for a refund.

They would fuck me?

yeah, AND you'd be so goddamn pregnant by the time they were done, you'd have to leave in a fucking clown car.
I mean look at that woman in the middle. Just look at that fucking "come get some baby" glare in her eyes. She knows you have nothing to bring to a fight. She'd blow two holes right through you before you ever walked through the door. Shit.

That motherfucker on the right looks almost SURPRISED by the sheer volume of mindblowing fucked you'd be if you started some shit with them.

I'm not scared of them
That's like, my favorite picture
I want to be their friend


You want to be their friend? Yeah? You ain't got D20s big enough.

Idk Wtf is.d20


These fuckers can roll a D20 like yo mama rolls over for the mailman. It's nothing to them. They don't fucking fuck around. They'd take one look at your Level 45 Mage and then drop a god damn boulder out of nowhere on that wussy birthday magician. Because you'd never Save Vs. These Fuckers. There ain't enough sides on a D20 to count that high.

sorry, D&D reference. D20 is a 20-sided die.

Omg omg omg
You NERF
NERD

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on May 08, 2013, 06:53:27 AM
Quote from: V3X on May 08, 2013, 06:50:40 AM
An exchange a few minutes ago on Facebook, between myself [normal text] and my token Dominican ladyfriend [italicized], concerning the cover photo of Twid's Facebook profile:

Quote

Dude
Look at your friends cover photo
Lmfao
Lmfao Lmfao


yeah he's a fucking bad ass
so what

Look at the ppl in the cover photo
Lmfao Lmfao Lmfao


yeah, and? every single one of those bad motherfuckers will legitimately fuck your shit sideways sixteen times before breakfast, and ask for a refund.

They would fuck me?

yeah, AND you'd be so goddamn pregnant by the time they were done, you'd have to leave in a fucking clown car.
I mean look at that woman in the middle. Just look at that fucking "come get some baby" glare in her eyes. She knows you have nothing to bring to a fight. She'd blow two holes right through you before you ever walked through the door. Shit.

That motherfucker on the right looks almost SURPRISED by the sheer volume of mindblowing fucked you'd be if you started some shit with them.

I'm not scared of them
That's like, my favorite picture
I want to be their friend


You want to be their friend? Yeah? You ain't got D20s big enough.

Idk Wtf is.d20


These fuckers can roll a D20 like yo mama rolls over for the mailman. It's nothing to them. They don't fucking fuck around. They'd take one look at your Level 45 Mage and then drop a god damn boulder out of nowhere on that wussy birthday magician. Because you'd never Save Vs. These Fuckers. There ain't enough sides on a D20 to count that high.

sorry, D&D reference. D20 is a 20-sided die.

Omg omg omg
You NERF
NERD


:lulz:

Hi five dude
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on May 08, 2013, 07:08:28 AM
Quote from: El Twid on May 08, 2013, 06:53:27 AM
Quote from: V3X on May 08, 2013, 06:50:40 AM
An exchange a few minutes ago on Facebook, between myself [normal text] and my token Dominican ladyfriend [italicized], concerning the cover photo of Twid's Facebook profile:

Quote

Dude
Look at your friends cover photo
Lmfao
Lmfao Lmfao


yeah he's a fucking bad ass
so what

Look at the ppl in the cover photo
Lmfao Lmfao Lmfao


yeah, and? every single one of those bad motherfuckers will legitimately fuck your shit sideways sixteen times before breakfast, and ask for a refund.

They would fuck me?

yeah, AND you'd be so goddamn pregnant by the time they were done, you'd have to leave in a fucking clown car.
I mean look at that woman in the middle. Just look at that fucking "come get some baby" glare in her eyes. She knows you have nothing to bring to a fight. She'd blow two holes right through you before you ever walked through the door. Shit.

That motherfucker on the right looks almost SURPRISED by the sheer volume of mindblowing fucked you'd be if you started some shit with them.

I'm not scared of them
That's like, my favorite picture
I want to be their friend


You want to be their friend? Yeah? You ain't got D20s big enough.

Idk Wtf is.d20


These fuckers can roll a D20 like yo mama rolls over for the mailman. It's nothing to them. They don't fucking fuck around. They'd take one look at your Level 45 Mage and then drop a god damn boulder out of nowhere on that wussy birthday magician. Because you'd never Save Vs. These Fuckers. There ain't enough sides on a D20 to count that high.

sorry, D&D reference. D20 is a 20-sided die.

Omg omg omg
You NERF
NERD


:lulz:

Hi five dude
:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on May 15, 2013, 04:42:06 PM
Where do hippies get their adorably wrong ideas from? No seriously, because this one is pretty fucking stupid, even for a hippie:

QuoteYea right!! After 100 years with UN promoting and allowing World to spray highly toxic chemicals upon all the insect Kingdoms, with only a few substance outlawed, now sold for WARFARE ingredients for making chemical bombs.

TRUE PEACE will reign upon Earth when UN and all Governments preach vegetarianism and not The Protein Theory.

Crime, wars - Hardness of Heart, derives from slaughtering eating the flesh of animals. period. We are a species evolving intelligence for? Meat? Bugs?

i always know what's on my table!  it's always a fresh ripe ORGANIC harvest! And it's for, Heart!!

Source: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/u-n-encourages-people-eat-more-insects-004159870.html?bcmt=1368559452317-fa699b82-e51c-499b-8ae4-41d4736a17e1_00004b000000000000000000000000-46b74069-6715-4bfb-b791-ce88004d52c9&bcmt_s=u#mediacommentsugc_container
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 15, 2013, 04:45:05 PM
It's pretty impressive that the UN has been promoting highly toxic chemicals for 100 years when it was founded in 1945.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on May 15, 2013, 04:47:00 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 15, 2013, 04:45:05 PM
It's pretty impressive that the UN has been promoting highly toxic chemicals for 100 years when it was founded in 1945.

Time travel's a bitch.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 15, 2013, 04:50:45 PM
Quote from: El Twid on May 15, 2013, 04:42:06 PM
Where do hippies get their adorably wrong ideas from? No seriously, because this one is pretty fucking stupid, even for a hippie:

QuoteYea right!! After 100 years with UN promoting and allowing World to spray highly toxic chemicals upon all the insect Kingdoms, with only a few substance outlawed, now sold for WARFARE ingredients for making chemical bombs.

TRUE PEACE will reign upon Earth when UN and all Governments preach vegetarianism and not The Protein Theory.

Crime, wars - Hardness of Heart, derives from slaughtering eating the flesh of animals. period. We are a species evolving intelligence for? Meat? Bugs?

i always know what's on my table!  it's always a fresh ripe ORGANIC harvest! And it's for, Heart!!

Source: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/u-n-encourages-people-eat-more-insects-004159870.html?bcmt=1368559452317-fa699b82-e51c-499b-8ae4-41d4736a17e1_00004b000000000000000000000000-46b74069-6715-4bfb-b791-ce88004d52c9&bcmt_s=u#mediacommentsugc_container

One of my theories is that they're all from an alternate universe where that shit is actually true.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on May 15, 2013, 04:52:18 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on May 15, 2013, 04:50:45 PM
Quote from: El Twid on May 15, 2013, 04:42:06 PM
Where do hippies get their adorably wrong ideas from? No seriously, because this one is pretty fucking stupid, even for a hippie:

QuoteYea right!! After 100 years with UN promoting and allowing World to spray highly toxic chemicals upon all the insect Kingdoms, with only a few substance outlawed, now sold for WARFARE ingredients for making chemical bombs.

TRUE PEACE will reign upon Earth when UN and all Governments preach vegetarianism and not The Protein Theory.

Crime, wars - Hardness of Heart, derives from slaughtering eating the flesh of animals. period. We are a species evolving intelligence for? Meat? Bugs?

i always know what's on my table!  it's always a fresh ripe ORGANIC harvest! And it's for, Heart!!

Source: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/u-n-encourages-people-eat-more-insects-004159870.html?bcmt=1368559452317-fa699b82-e51c-499b-8ae4-41d4736a17e1_00004b000000000000000000000000-46b74069-6715-4bfb-b791-ce88004d52c9&bcmt_s=u#mediacommentsugc_container

One of my theories is that they're all from an alternate universe where that shit is actually true.

That... that has a lot of entertainment potential right there.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 15, 2013, 04:58:46 PM
Quote from: El Twid on May 15, 2013, 04:52:18 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on May 15, 2013, 04:50:45 PM
Quote from: El Twid on May 15, 2013, 04:42:06 PM
Where do hippies get their adorably wrong ideas from? No seriously, because this one is pretty fucking stupid, even for a hippie:

QuoteYea right!! After 100 years with UN promoting and allowing World to spray highly toxic chemicals upon all the insect Kingdoms, with only a few substance outlawed, now sold for WARFARE ingredients for making chemical bombs.

TRUE PEACE will reign upon Earth when UN and all Governments preach vegetarianism and not The Protein Theory.

Crime, wars - Hardness of Heart, derives from slaughtering eating the flesh of animals. period. We are a species evolving intelligence for? Meat? Bugs?

i always know what's on my table!  it's always a fresh ripe ORGANIC harvest! And it's for, Heart!!

Source: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/u-n-encourages-people-eat-more-insects-004159870.html?bcmt=1368559452317-fa699b82-e51c-499b-8ae4-41d4736a17e1_00004b000000000000000000000000-46b74069-6715-4bfb-b791-ce88004d52c9&bcmt_s=u#mediacommentsugc_container

One of my theories is that they're all from an alternate universe where that shit is actually true.

That... that has a lot of entertainment potential right there.

Ooooh, you're right...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on May 15, 2013, 04:59:52 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on May 15, 2013, 04:58:46 PM
Quote from: El Twid on May 15, 2013, 04:52:18 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on May 15, 2013, 04:50:45 PM
Quote from: El Twid on May 15, 2013, 04:42:06 PM
Where do hippies get their adorably wrong ideas from? No seriously, because this one is pretty fucking stupid, even for a hippie:

QuoteYea right!! After 100 years with UN promoting and allowing World to spray highly toxic chemicals upon all the insect Kingdoms, with only a few substance outlawed, now sold for WARFARE ingredients for making chemical bombs.

TRUE PEACE will reign upon Earth when UN and all Governments preach vegetarianism and not The Protein Theory.

Crime, wars - Hardness of Heart, derives from slaughtering eating the flesh of animals. period. We are a species evolving intelligence for? Meat? Bugs?

i always know what's on my table!  it's always a fresh ripe ORGANIC harvest! And it's for, Heart!!

Source: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/u-n-encourages-people-eat-more-insects-004159870.html?bcmt=1368559452317-fa699b82-e51c-499b-8ae4-41d4736a17e1_00004b000000000000000000000000-46b74069-6715-4bfb-b791-ce88004d52c9&bcmt_s=u#mediacommentsugc_container

One of my theories is that they're all from an alternate universe where that shit is actually true.

That... that has a lot of entertainment potential right there.

Ooooh, you're right...

Happy, trolly, accidents.  :wink:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on May 16, 2013, 03:07:43 AM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on May 16, 2013, 04:05:18 AM
Quote from: Cain on May 15, 2013, 04:45:05 PM
It's pretty impressive that the UN has been promoting highly toxic chemicals for 100 years when it was founded in 1945.

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on May 16, 2013, 07:45:45 PM
"I've been wearing my sports bra for over 24 hours!" - text from my sister.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 30, 2013, 08:32:26 AM
Nig: I made 15 dicks today
Nig: a nice full bowl
BF: Thats great you are such a helper
BF: Did you finish all the dicks?
Nig: I help facilitate the connection between man and dick
Nig: Tomorrow I take my dicks to the Good Gallery and see if Scott wants them
BF: You are good at your work
Nig: I am a mastery of dicking
Nig: or something
BF: Cant say no to dick
Nig: Seriously!
Nig: Everybody loves dick!
Nig: Rude is coming over tomorrow to see my dicks
Nig: I will show my dicks to everyone
BF: You were dicked most of the day? Four hours?
Nig: Yes, about four hours of dicking
BF: Hot day, and the detailed work
BF: You had four hours of hot, hard dicking?
Nig: I really sweated over those hot dicks
BF: Over and over
Nig: Dick after dick for hours on end
BF: You are very good at making dicks
Nig: I am! I'm a diligent dicker.
Nig: I figured out how to do both circumcised and uncircumcised dicks today, too!
BF: Would you say you had about 10 feet of dick in you?
BF: Before you got the work out
Nig: By the time I'm done, certainly. At LEAST 10 feet of dick.
Nig: So, about 8.6 feet of dick left.
BF: That is a lot of hard
Nig: I will be dealing in dicks at least a couple more times before the show
BF: Hot cock
Nig: I'd really like to do at least 45 dicks
BF: I mean dick
Nig: Yeah, not so much cock
Nig: I'm not that good at making chickens
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on June 30, 2013, 12:49:28 PM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 17, 2013, 03:58:39 AM
Pickles: eggs? She said mammals.
Me: dude. Im right. Write it down.
Pickles: what the hell is a monotreme anyway?
Me: like fucking platypi and shit. 
Pickles: thats our team name next week.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 18, 2013, 01:51:50 AM
<FatFuckup>It's a long Buddhist poem which is very suitable to add to the bot
<FatFuckup>better than the Dhammapada which is dualistic
<duphenix>man, everyone is down on dualism these days
<duphenix>i just want to say dualism is the best, almost as good as pluralism
<duphenix>see, i just had a bagel/egg/bacon/cream cheese sandwich
<duphenix>because of pluralism, this was a variety of flavors in every bite
<duphenix>if i had eaten in it a non-plural way, every bite would have just tasted like -- sandwich
<duphenix>that is my defense of non-non-dualism
- Eve quit (Quit: goodbye for an arbitrary amount of time)
<FatFuckup>fair enough
- ksf quit (Quit: Leaving)
<duphenix>we can refer to it ever after as the bagel breakfast sandwich defense
<FatFuckup>well there really is dualism in non dualism. I had a quote explaining this fucked up thing
<FatFuckup>I'm lazy now to quote it
<duphenix>yeah, i've heard that
<FatFuckup>It was ixxie's. And you said it was a koan. :-)
<duphenix>i'm convinced that non-dualism is a good stage for people to go through to remove many prejudices
<duphenix>i'm not yet convinced of it pragmatism in my eating a bagel breakfast sandwich
<FatFuckup>You are right
<duphenix>they have a truck here that sells bagel breakfast sandwiches
<duphenix>until 8pm on weekdays
<Cain>I believe in dualistic bagels.  there is a bagel, and then there is a non-bagel.  there is a brief transformative phase, inside my mouth, but it's best not to dwell on the ineffable mystery of it too closely
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2013, 01:56:22 AM
Quote from: Cain on July 18, 2013, 01:51:50 AM
<FatFuckup>It's a long Buddhist poem which is very suitable to add to the bot
<FatFuckup>better than the Dhammapada which is dualistic
<duphenix>man, everyone is down on dualism these days
<duphenix>i just want to say dualism is the best, almost as good as pluralism
<duphenix>see, i just had a bagel/egg/bacon/cream cheese sandwich
<duphenix>because of pluralism, this was a variety of flavors in every bite
<duphenix>if i had eaten in it a non-plural way, every bite would have just tasted like -- sandwich
<duphenix>that is my defense of non-non-dualism
- Eve quit (Quit: goodbye for an arbitrary amount of time)
<FatFuckup>fair enough
- ksf quit (Quit: Leaving)
<duphenix>we can refer to it ever after as the bagel breakfast sandwich defense
<FatFuckup>well there really is dualism in non dualism. I had a quote explaining this fucked up thing
<FatFuckup>I'm lazy now to quote it
<duphenix>yeah, i've heard that
<FatFuckup>It was ixxie's. And you said it was a koan. :-)
<duphenix>i'm convinced that non-dualism is a good stage for people to go through to remove many prejudices
<duphenix>i'm not yet convinced of it pragmatism in my eating a bagel breakfast sandwich
<FatFuckup>You are right
<duphenix>they have a truck here that sells bagel breakfast sandwiches
<duphenix>until 8pm on weekdays
<Cain>I believe in dualistic bagels.  there is a bagel, and then there is a non-bagel.  there is a brief transformative phase, inside my mouth, but it's best not to dwell on the ineffable mystery of it too closely

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on July 18, 2013, 04:08:18 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 18, 2013, 01:57:10 PM
First there is a bagel.
Then, there is no bagel.
Then there is.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 18, 2013, 01:58:25 PM
The above led to this www.fluxcraft.net/index.php/Dualistic_Bagel
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 18, 2013, 02:20:30 PM
I like the notes regarding the defense at the bottom.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 18, 2013, 02:24:10 PM
Also worth posting because Ixxie's project for Fluxcraft is an interesting and possibly worthwhile one:

Quoteed. We hope to achieve variations in Tone and Content spanning the Arts, Sciences, Philosophies, Religions, Crafts and any other Cultural Domain that comes to mind. Initial Themes in Mind are: Discordianism, Anarchy, Decentralization, Skepticism, Pragmatism, Convexity Analysis & Bimodal Strategies, Probability Theory and Statistics, Non-Dualism, Humor, (SocioCultural, Technological, Genetic) Evolution, Ecology, Behavioural Science, Biomathematics and Various Mystical Arts.

And he's a fan of LessWrong.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 18, 2013, 02:54:26 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 18, 2013, 01:57:10 PM
First there is a bagel.  On Plate
Then, there is no bagel. IN MY FACE
Then there is. Nobody wants to see THAT

Finished that for you.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 18, 2013, 03:38:34 PM
Quote from: Cain on July 18, 2013, 02:24:10 PM
Also worth posting because Ixxie's project for Fluxcraft is an interesting and possibly worthwhile one:

Quoteed. We hope to achieve variations in Tone and Content spanning the Arts, Sciences, Philosophies, Religions, Crafts and any other Cultural Domain that comes to mind. Initial Themes in Mind are: Discordianism, Anarchy, Decentralization, Skepticism, Pragmatism, Convexity Analysis & Bimodal Strategies, Probability Theory and Statistics, Non-Dualism, Humor, (SocioCultural, Technological, Genetic) Evolution, Ecology, Behavioural Science, Biomathematics and Various Mystical Arts.

And he's a fan of LessWrong.

That is very cool.  I'll have to poke around a bit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 18, 2013, 03:39:10 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 18, 2013, 02:54:26 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 18, 2013, 01:57:10 PM
First there is a bagel.  On Plate
Then, there is no bagel. IN MY FACE
Then there is. Nobody wants to see THAT

Finished that for you.

:happythoughts:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on July 19, 2013, 08:31:10 PM
There are people that deal drugs right in front of my house.
Somebody pulls up, always a different somebody.
The same SUV pulls up from down the street.
One or more persons in the other car get in the SUV and eventually comes back with a handful of something and a kick in their step.

As this is a concern for our neighbors, and to get an idea of how to handle this, I approach the lady across the street.
After a bit of conversation where I find out her mother was born and raised 1km from where my mother was born and raised in Germany she drops this bomb:

"If all the police in this country were run by Sheriff Joe we wouldn't have these problems."

:kingmeh:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 19, 2013, 08:47:04 PM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2013, 08:31:10 PM
There are people that deal drugs right in front of my house.
Somebody pulls up, always a different somebody.
The same SUV pulls up from down the street.
One or more persons in the other car get in the SUV and eventually comes back with a handful of something and a kick in their step.

As this is a concern for our neighbors, and to get an idea of how to handle this, I approach the lady across the street.
After a bit of conversation where I find out her mother was born and raised 1km from where my mother was born and raised in Germany she drops this bomb:

"If all the police in this country were run by Sheriff Joe we wouldn't have these problems."

:kingmeh:

Oh yeah, there are totally no drugs in Phoenix, for example. http://www.azcentral.com/community/phoenix/articles/20130424phoenix-crime-sweep-abrk.html
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 19, 2013, 08:53:21 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 19, 2013, 08:47:04 PM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2013, 08:31:10 PM
There are people that deal drugs right in front of my house.
Somebody pulls up, always a different somebody.
The same SUV pulls up from down the street.
One or more persons in the other car get in the SUV and eventually comes back with a handful of something and a kick in their step.

As this is a concern for our neighbors, and to get an idea of how to handle this, I approach the lady across the street.
After a bit of conversation where I find out her mother was born and raised 1km from where my mother was born and raised in Germany she drops this bomb:

"If all the police in this country were run by Sheriff Joe we wouldn't have these problems."

:kingmeh:

Oh yeah, there are totally no drugs in Phoenix, for example. http://www.azcentral.com/community/phoenix/articles/20130424phoenix-crime-sweep-abrk.html

Easy answers for little minds.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 19, 2013, 08:54:12 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 19, 2013, 08:53:21 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 19, 2013, 08:47:04 PM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2013, 08:31:10 PM
There are people that deal drugs right in front of my house.
Somebody pulls up, always a different somebody.
The same SUV pulls up from down the street.
One or more persons in the other car get in the SUV and eventually comes back with a handful of something and a kick in their step.

As this is a concern for our neighbors, and to get an idea of how to handle this, I approach the lady across the street.
After a bit of conversation where I find out her mother was born and raised 1km from where my mother was born and raised in Germany she drops this bomb:

"If all the police in this country were run by Sheriff Joe we wouldn't have these problems."

:kingmeh:

Oh yeah, there are totally no drugs in Phoenix, for example. http://www.azcentral.com/community/phoenix/articles/20130424phoenix-crime-sweep-abrk.html

Easy answers for little minds.

Pretty much the way it goes. Just simplify everything into black and white terms, no thinking necessary.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 19, 2013, 08:55:17 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 19, 2013, 08:54:12 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 19, 2013, 08:53:21 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 19, 2013, 08:47:04 PM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2013, 08:31:10 PM
There are people that deal drugs right in front of my house.
Somebody pulls up, always a different somebody.
The same SUV pulls up from down the street.
One or more persons in the other car get in the SUV and eventually comes back with a handful of something and a kick in their step.

As this is a concern for our neighbors, and to get an idea of how to handle this, I approach the lady across the street.
After a bit of conversation where I find out her mother was born and raised 1km from where my mother was born and raised in Germany she drops this bomb:

"If all the police in this country were run by Sheriff Joe we wouldn't have these problems."

:kingmeh:

Oh yeah, there are totally no drugs in Phoenix, for example. http://www.azcentral.com/community/phoenix/articles/20130424phoenix-crime-sweep-abrk.html

Easy answers for little minds.

Pretty much the way it goes. Just simplify everything into black and white terms, no thinking necessary.

Why think, when you can just hire a dictator?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on July 19, 2013, 08:59:29 PM
It's sort of funny because I thought writing down license plates, times, descriptions, and handing that info to the cops might be a dangerous thing to do, lord know what these people are like.

She said APD told her to do that very thing, and complained about how she doesn't have the time.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on July 19, 2013, 09:00:29 PM
We want RESULTS without community, and expected life with no effort. It's supposed to be this way, what happened to the good old days, blahblahblah.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 19, 2013, 09:08:36 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 19, 2013, 08:55:17 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 19, 2013, 08:54:12 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 19, 2013, 08:53:21 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 19, 2013, 08:47:04 PM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2013, 08:31:10 PM
There are people that deal drugs right in front of my house.
Somebody pulls up, always a different somebody.
The same SUV pulls up from down the street.
One or more persons in the other car get in the SUV and eventually comes back with a handful of something and a kick in their step.

As this is a concern for our neighbors, and to get an idea of how to handle this, I approach the lady across the street.
After a bit of conversation where I find out her mother was born and raised 1km from where my mother was born and raised in Germany she drops this bomb:

"If all the police in this country were run by Sheriff Joe we wouldn't have these problems."

:kingmeh:

Oh yeah, there are totally no drugs in Phoenix, for example. http://www.azcentral.com/community/phoenix/articles/20130424phoenix-crime-sweep-abrk.html

Easy answers for little minds.

Pretty much the way it goes. Just simplify everything into black and white terms, no thinking necessary.

Why think, when you can just hire a dictator?

PLEASE, MISTER POLICY MAN, WON'T YOU TELL ME WHAT TO THINK? AND WHAT I CAN READ, OR SEE WITH MY EYES? TELL ME WHAT TO DO WITH MY BODY

FOR THE CHILDREN.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on July 21, 2013, 02:06:05 PM
QuoteYou: hi
Stranger: hello m or f ?
You: neither, I'm a cabbage
Stranger: cum on just say
You: I reproduce through pollination
You: sexy, sexy pollination
Stranger: u a f cabbage
Stranger: fem
You: Like all flowering plants, I produce both gametes
You: do you wanna swap pollen?
You: Through an intermediary organism like a bee or ant?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on July 21, 2013, 03:13:32 PM
"Rhode Island: NO Characters are fictional." - My former boss, on describing how her friends went to watch Jerry Springer just to heckle the fuck out of it and get on TV.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 27, 2013, 04:42:01 AM
Facebook:


High school friend: Gotta love how some people believe you are not considered a "good" or "real" American unless you believe in god and are conservative. Yep, good to know that a country that was founded on the basis of separation of church and state still requires the belief in god to be an upstanding citizen.

Twid: They would argue that you have freedom of and not freedom from religion. And also that because the founders were nominally christian that its a christian nation at its base. Of course though the whole idea is at odds with the concept of a single theistic law giving god. You get to vote for your congressman but get no say in how your universe is run.

HSF husband: I must be a fucking terrorist to them lol

Random guy 1: I get this all the time. I'm with you.

Random gal 1: Shut it, heathen!

Christian woman: Now you know I love you but I would like to point out that under God We Trust is in one of the founding documents this country was built on. We also pledge our allegiance under God... just some food for thought

HSF: Yeah but to judge someone's patriotism based on religion is like basing your religiousness solely on how much money you donate to the church.

Christian woman: Sounds like youve been talking to a Catholic

HSF: I was raised one lol. My nana said how they used to publish who donated how much each week.

Twid: Under god was added to the pledge in the twentieth century. Just saying.

Twid: In god we trust appeared on coins in 1864 and only became an official motto in 1956. Note the timing on the coins. Coincides with the tail end of the civil war.

CW: thanks but not the point I was making. its still there. I don't give a crap when it was added. and Michele... that is so wrong on so many different levels.

Twid: Well it is fairly important to think about when and why things were added. The founders were largely rational deists in favor of a secular republic. God doesnt mean the same thing to everyone who says the word. Einstein is a prime example of that.

CW: OK and in 1776 the founding fathers signed in the good will of the Lord. sorry but your ideology on God not being there when the USA was founded is wrong.
and with that I'm done. I'm a christian and will Pray that you find him before your time comes to end.

Twid: Im also a christian. Just one with a better grasp on the religious views of the founders.

CW: so u know them personally. lovely. tell George I said hi.

Twid: I do however reject the idea that god was there guiding america to some glorious place in history. Were just another country. Nothing particularly special about up other than our insistance that were number one.

Twid: I dont have to know them personally. All i have to do is crack open a history book.

CW: And then you still get based opinion and no actual fact. in the text of certain docs u do however find the guidance God gave them. read the Dec of Ind. its in there

Twid: You do realize that history books are based on primary sources right? The founders talked a lot about the nature of god. Their concept of god is something different than what youre projecting on to them. Thomas jefferson was almost practically an atheist who was fairly antagonistic towards organized christianity.

Twid: As the government of the united states is not in any sense founded on the christian religion... Treaty of tripoli signed in 1796

Twid: Christianity is the most perverted system that ever shone on man. Thomas jefferson

Twid: There is not one redeeming feature in our superstition of christianity. It has made one half the world fools and the other half hypocrites. Jefferson again.

Twid: This would be the best of all possible worlds if there were no religion in it. John adams

CW: wikipedia does wonders but the Bible contains the words you should be quoting. nice chat tho. thanks for the entertainment.

Twid: I wasnt using wikipedia. As far as i should be quoting the bible in regards to how the founders felt about god ill close with a lincoln quote- the bible is not my book nor christianity my profession.

Twid: I know having your myths shattered is fairly distressing so ill let you think those ones over for the weekend.

CW: and again I'll pray for you, clearly you need it.

Twid: Lighthouses are more useful than churches. Ben franklin

Twid: I can pray for myself. I dont need you to impose it upon me.

Random guy 2: Thanks <Twid FB name>. Read this thread...this is why i'm a teacher, to bust misconceptions and search for truth, however painful.

Twid: America's built on too much myth and not enough truth.

Twid: Also, I gotta say, "I'll pray for you, you clearly need it" is probably the most un-American thing I've heard in a while. Yes, tell a history major that his idea of history, which is based on from the horse's mouth, is wrong because my historical fairy tales are precious to me. Therefore I will pray to my interpretation of Manifest Destiny Amerijesus to telepathically control you and show you the error of your factual ways.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 27, 2013, 04:49:59 AM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2013, 08:31:10 PM
There are people that deal drugs right in front of my house.
Somebody pulls up, always a different somebody.
The same SUV pulls up from down the street.
One or more persons in the other car get in the SUV and eventually comes back with a handful of something and a kick in their step.

As this is a concern for our neighbors, and to get an idea of how to handle this, I approach the lady across the street.
After a bit of conversation where I find out her mother was born and raised 1km from where my mother was born and raised in Germany she drops this bomb:

"If all the police in this country were run by Sheriff Joe we wouldn't have these problems."

:kingmeh:

That's fucking special.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 27, 2013, 04:50:43 AM
Quote from: Queen Gogira Pennyworth, BSW on July 21, 2013, 02:06:05 PM
QuoteYou: hi
Stranger: hello m or f ?
You: neither, I'm a cabbage
Stranger: cum on just say
You: I reproduce through pollination
You: sexy, sexy pollination
Stranger: u a f cabbage
Stranger: fem
You: Like all flowering plants, I produce both gametes
You: do you wanna swap pollen?
You: Through an intermediary organism like a bee or ant?

:spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Left on July 27, 2013, 04:52:31 AM
Quote from: Freeky Queen of DERP on July 27, 2013, 04:49:59 AM
Quote from: Alty on July 19, 2013, 08:31:10 PM
There are people that deal drugs right in front of my house.
Somebody pulls up, always a different somebody.
The same SUV pulls up from down the street.
One or more persons in the other car get in the SUV and eventually comes back with a handful of something and a kick in their step.

As this is a concern for our neighbors, and to get an idea of how to handle this, I approach the lady across the street.
After a bit of conversation where I find out her mother was born and raised 1km from where my mother was born and raised in Germany she drops this bomb:

"If all the police in this country were run by Sheriff Joe we wouldn't have these problems."

:kingmeh:


That's fucking special.

Yeah, you'd have another, far more scary set of problems.

...I get being worried the local PD are being paid off by the dealers.
...State PD may be a safer bet.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 27, 2013, 07:48:01 AM
Hideo Kojima successfully predicted the future of the internet in 2001.  From the dialogue near the end of Metal Gear Solid 2:


The digital society furthers human flaws and selectively rewards development of convenient half-truths. Just look at the strange juxtapositions of morality around you.

Billions spent on new weapons in order to humanely murder other humans.  Rights of criminals are given more respect than the privacy of their victims. Although there are people suffering in poverty, huge donations are made to protect endangered species.

Everyone grows up being told the same thing:

Be nice to other people.  But beat out the competition!

"You're special." "Believe in yourself and you will succeed." But it's obvious from the start that only a few can succeed...

You exercise your right to "freedom" and this is the result. All rhetoric to avoid conflict and protect each other from hurt. The untested truths spun by different interests continue to churn and accumulate in the sandbox of political correctness and value systems.

Everyone withdraws into their own small gated community, afraid of a larger forum. They stay inside their little ponds, leaking whatever "truth" suits them into the growing cesspool of society at large.  The different cardinal truths neither clash nor mesh. No one is invalidated, but nobody is right.

Not even natural selection can take place here. The world is being engulfed in "truth."

And this is how the world ends. Not with a bang, but a whimper.

We're trying to stop that from happening. It's our responsibility as rulers. Just as in genetics, unnecessary information and memory must be filtered out to stimulate the evolution of the species.

[...] Who else could wade through the sea of garbage you people produce, retrive valuable truths and even interpret their meaning for later generations?

That's what it means to create context.

[...]

That's the proof of your incompetence right there. You lack the qualifications to exercise free will.

That which you call self serves as nothing more than a mask to cover your own being. In this era of ready made 'truths', self is just something used to preserve those positive emotions that you occasionally feel. Another possibility is that self is a concept you borrowed under the logic that it would endow you with some sense of strength...

[...]

In denial, you simply resort to looking for another, more convenient 'truth' in order to make yourself feel better, leaving behind in an instant the so-called 'truth' you once embraced.

Should someone like that be allowed to decide what is 'truth'? Should someone like you even have the right to decide!

You've done nothing but abuse your freedom. You don't deserve to be free!

We're not the ones smothering the world. You are.

The individual is supposed to be weak. But far from powerless, a single person has the potential to ruin the world. And the age of digitized communication has given even more power to the individual. Too much power for such an immature species. That's why we've decided to be your guardians, if you will.

Building a legacy involves figuring out what is wanted, and what needs to be done for that goal. all this, you used to struggle with. Now, we think for you.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 27, 2013, 07:56:04 AM
Quote from: Cain on July 27, 2013, 07:48:01 AM
Hideo Kojima successfully predicted the future of the internet in 2001.  From the dialogue near the end of Metal Gear Solid 2:


The digital society furthers human flaws and selectively rewards development of convenient half-truths. Just look at the strange juxtapositions of morality around you.

Billions spent on new weapons in order to humanely murder other humans.  Rights of criminals are given more respect than the privacy of their victims. Although there are people suffering in poverty, huge donations are made to protect endangered species.

Everyone grows up being told the same thing:

Be nice to other people.  But beat out the competition!

"You're special." "Believe in yourself and you will succeed." But it's obvious from the start that only a few can succeed...

You exercise your right to "freedom" and this is the result. All rhetoric to avoid conflict and protect each other from hurt. The untested truths spun by different interests continue to churn and accumulate in the sandbox of political correctness and value systems.

Everyone withdraws into their own small gated community, afraid of a larger forum. They stay inside their little ponds, leaking whatever "truth" suits them into the growing cesspool of society at large.  The different cardinal truths neither clash nor mesh. No one is invalidated, but nobody is right.

Not even natural selection can take place here. The world is being engulfed in "truth."

And this is how the world ends. Not with a bang, but a whimper.

We're trying to stop that from happening. It's our responsibility as rulers. Just as in genetics, unnecessary information and memory must be filtered out to stimulate the evolution of the species.

[...] Who else could wade through the sea of garbage you people produce, retrive valuable truths and even interpret their meaning for later generations?

That's what it means to create context.

[...]

That's the proof of your incompetence right there. You lack the qualifications to exercise free will.

That which you call self serves as nothing more than a mask to cover your own being. In this era of ready made 'truths', self is just something used to preserve those positive emotions that you occasionally feel. Another possibility is that self is a concept you borrowed under the logic that it would endow you with some sense of strength...

[...]

In denial, you simply resort to looking for another, more convenient 'truth' in order to make yourself feel better, leaving behind in an instant the so-called 'truth' you once embraced.

Should someone like that be allowed to decide what is 'truth'? Should someone like you even have the right to decide!

You've done nothing but abuse your freedom. You don't deserve to be free!

We're not the ones smothering the world. You are.

The individual is supposed to be weak. But far from powerless, a single person has the potential to ruin the world. And the age of digitized communication has given even more power to the individual. Too much power for such an immature species. That's why we've decided to be your guardians, if you will.

Building a legacy involves figuring out what is wanted, and what needs to be done for that goal. all this, you used to struggle with. Now, we think for you.

I don't know what to say to that other than, "well, damn..."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 27, 2013, 08:46:15 AM
The whole series is quotable as hell.  From the 4th game:

QuoteWar has changed. It's no longer about nations, ideologies or ethnicity. It's an endless series of proxy battles, fought by mercenaries and machines. War, and its consumption of life, has become a well-oiled machine. War has changed. ID tagged soldiers carry ID tagged weapons, use ID tagged gear. Nanomachines inside their bodies enhance and regulate their abilities. Genetic control. Information control. Emotion control. Battlefield control. Everything is monitored, and kept under control. War has changed. The age of deterrence has become the age of control. All in the name of averting catastrophe from weapons of mass destruction. And he who controls the battlefield, controls history. War has changed. When the battlefield is under total control, war... becomes routine.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 31, 2013, 01:38:42 AM
"Wow!  Look at that blood pressure!  The fact that you walked in here under your own power is a testament to your overall health.  Yes, we'll be changing those sleep meds."

-- My doctor.

That being said, sorry if I've been a dick for the last couple of days.  I will probably be a dick for at least another couple of days, while this awful shit works its way out of my system.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Left on July 31, 2013, 04:11:01 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 31, 2013, 01:38:42 AM
"Wow!  Look at that blood pressure!  The fact that you walked in here under your own power is a testament to your overall health.  Yes, we'll be changing those sleep meds."

-- My doctor.

That being said, sorry if I've been a dick for the last couple of days.  I will probably be a dick for at least another couple of days, while this awful shit works its way out of my system.

Way too high or way too low?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on July 31, 2013, 04:14:12 AM
It's love of people that powers you.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 31, 2013, 02:25:40 PM
Those of us that know you, know you.  Those that don't, don't matter.

But so help me, if you have a stroke, I will HATE YOU FOREVER.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on July 31, 2013, 02:30:13 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 31, 2013, 01:38:42 AM
"Wow!  Look at that blood pressure!  The fact that you walked in here under your own power is a testament to your overall health.  Yes, we'll be changing those sleep meds."

-- My doctor.

That being said, sorry if I've been a dick for the last couple of days.  I will probably be a dick for at least another couple of days, while this awful shit works its way out of my system.

Jesus. Stay alive, man. We can focus on the details when PILLZ HERE aren't fucking you up.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 31, 2013, 04:15:34 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 31, 2013, 01:38:42 AM
"Wow!  Look at that blood pressure!  The fact that you walked in here under your own power is a testament to your overall health.  Yes, we'll be changing those sleep meds."

-- My doctor.

That being said, sorry if I've been a dick for the last couple of days.  I will probably be a dick for at least another couple of days, while this awful shit works its way out of my system.

It's all good, as long as you don't die.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 01, 2013, 10:08:24 PM
<Burns>!tell Burns watch go's link: http://youtu.be/wtGBwnn1paA
<F-U-C-K-U-P>Burns: No.
<F-U-C-K-U-P>Burns: ?@#^Rise?@#^Of?@#^The?@#^Triad?@#^ROTT?@#^H.U.N.T.?@#^ray sipe;parody;facebook;youtube ~|~ length 2m 2s
<Burns>oh that's me
<Burns>where is otherburns
<beeble>!iching
<Cain>!an the other burns
<F-U-C-K-U-P>Cain: 'the other burns' anagrams to: The snob hurter.
<Cain>ah, THAT burns
* Burns will fuck a snob UP
<Burns>NO, you will NOT get an extra shot in your latte
<Burns>Fuck your redeye you uppity ho
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 20, 2013, 05:06:20 AM
via text:

PicklesGF: Pook [a nickname from high school], I wanna throw [Pickles] a Star Trek themed surprise party for his b-day. What do you think?
Twid: Sounds good!
PicklesGF: You have to help me plan it.
PicklesGF: I will dress like Uhura [she's black]. Should I get him a stripped?
PicklesGF: Stripper. You know, one with glasses.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 20, 2013, 05:07:03 AM
^Honestly don't know how to respond to that last bit.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on August 20, 2013, 02:23:51 PM
yeah you like that glasses porn

:kojak:






btw - star trek themed party, the best possible thing you could do is get together six laptops and play ARTEMIS (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9Q2X32hZNk). Played it last weekend, was the coolest shit ever.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on August 20, 2013, 03:41:55 PM
Quote from: Aloha Ackbar on August 20, 2013, 05:07:03 AM
^Honestly don't know how to respond to that last bit.

"No, they're too expensive. I'll be the stripper."

... is the only answer I could possibly give to a question like that
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 20, 2013, 05:06:51 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on August 20, 2013, 03:41:55 PM
Quote from: Aloha Ackbar on August 20, 2013, 05:07:03 AM
^Honestly don't know how to respond to that last bit.

"No, they're too expensive. I'll be the stripper."

... is the only answer I could possibly give to a question like that

Excellent. Using it.

Cram, I'm cueing up the video now.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on August 23, 2013, 03:38:56 PM
@chasemit: "A gay transgendered person who leaks U.S. military secrets -- Chelsea Manning is like the final boss in a Republican videogame."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on August 23, 2013, 04:15:50 PM
Boyfriend just came home early.

Me: "Wow, you're uh...really early today."

Him: "Yeah, we finished the class early."

Me: "Powerpoint presentation and then out?"

Him: "No...shipping personal goods."

Me: "...what?"

Him: "Yes, and the lady that was going to show us didn't show up."

Me: "Wait, they teach you how to ship packages in the Navy?!"

Him: *nods* "You have no idea what they fucking cover in C-School, it's a joke. And, once I move commands again, they have to teach me...AGAIN!"

Me: "Well...They certainly are, uh, thorough?"

Him: "Please, you should be there for the, 'So this tool is called a screwdriver' class."

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 23, 2013, 04:21:56 PM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on August 23, 2013, 03:38:56 PM
@chasemit: "A gay transgendered person who leaks U.S. military secrets -- Chelsea Manning is like the final boss in a Republican videogame."

Pretty sure Chelsea's hetero.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 23, 2013, 04:40:59 PM
Yeah.  My understanding was that they used gay in place of transgendered, maybe as Manning had not confirmed anything to that effect yet.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on August 23, 2013, 05:17:14 PM
Well there's a lot of speculation going on about this...either way I still lol'd at 'final boss in a Republican videogame.'
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 23, 2013, 05:45:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 23, 2013, 04:40:59 PM
Yeah.  My understanding was that they used gay in place of transgendered, maybe as Manning had not confirmed anything to that effect yet.

They used both. Maybe she switched orientations along with genders and is now a lesbian. :lol:

Either way, fuck Republicans, I hope they're seething.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on August 23, 2013, 08:50:33 PM
Quote from: FOCUS GROUP RAGEMONKEY OF HATE HATE HATE on August 23, 2013, 05:45:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 23, 2013, 04:40:59 PM
Yeah.  My understanding was that they used gay in place of transgendered, maybe as Manning had not confirmed anything to that effect yet.

They used both. Maybe she switched orientations along with genders and is now a lesbian. :lol:

Either way, fuck Republicans, I hope they're seething.

I'm waiting for "Gays are traitors".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 23, 2013, 11:05:03 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on August 23, 2013, 08:50:33 PM
Quote from: FOCUS GROUP RAGEMONKEY OF HATE HATE HATE on August 23, 2013, 05:45:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 23, 2013, 04:40:59 PM
Yeah.  My understanding was that they used gay in place of transgendered, maybe as Manning had not confirmed anything to that effect yet.

They used both. Maybe she switched orientations along with genders and is now a lesbian. :lol:

Either way, fuck Republicans, I hope they're seething.

I'm waiting for "Gays are traitors".

I would laugh, but it's probably too close to the truth.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 24, 2013, 02:24:08 AM
Quote from: FOCUS GROUP RAGEMONKEY OF HATE HATE HATE on August 23, 2013, 11:05:03 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on August 23, 2013, 08:50:33 PM
Quote from: FOCUS GROUP RAGEMONKEY OF HATE HATE HATE on August 23, 2013, 05:45:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on August 23, 2013, 04:40:59 PM
Yeah.  My understanding was that they used gay in place of transgendered, maybe as Manning had not confirmed anything to that effect yet.

They used both. Maybe she switched orientations along with genders and is now a lesbian. :lol:

Either way, fuck Republicans, I hope they're seething.

I'm waiting for "Gays are traitors".

I would laugh, but it's probably too close to the truth.

I'm honestly avoiding the story.

The headline tells me all I need to know. something that has no bearing on Manning nor the case and is really none of my business, and reading the comments section, which I do for any news article out of compulsion, is just going to make me want to damage my computer. And my computer has done nothing wrong here. My computer lets me talk to you spags, play games, find out new information and do my homework. My computer is my friend.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on August 24, 2013, 06:34:44 AM
What I hate about the coverage about Manning seeking gender reassignment is that it comes in the slot reserved in the media for negative coverage about popular or iconic people in the news. They can't fault anything Manning did, especially if they talk about specifics. So instead they come out with this "oh and by the way Bradley Manning is queer and wants to be a woman" shit, because that's the "worst" they've got on her. So it disgusts me on one hand because it's basically a smear campaign, and on the other hand because a person's gender identity can be used to "smear" them in the first place. They're fooling the masses with their own ignorance, and while they're at it they're potentially doing a lot of damage to other people who have no connection to Manning other than their "atypical" gender identities.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on August 24, 2013, 06:16:47 PM
Quote from: V3X on August 24, 2013, 06:34:44 AM
What I hate about the coverage about Manning seeking gender reassignment is that it comes in the slot reserved in the media for negative coverage about popular or iconic people in the news. They can't fault anything Manning did, especially if they talk about specifics. So instead they come out with this "oh and by the way Bradley Manning is queer and wants to be a woman" shit, because that's the "worst" they've got on her. So it disgusts me on one hand because it's basically a smear campaign, and on the other hand because a person's gender identity can be used to "smear" them in the first place. They're fooling the masses with their own ignorance, and while they're at it they're potentially doing a lot of damage to other people who have no connection to Manning other than their "atypical" gender identities.

See this is why I rarely post much around here.  V3X, and a good number of others basically articulate the way I typically feel inside so when it comes time to post something or not post something, it's usually just a matter of finding out who said it already.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on August 24, 2013, 07:34:28 PM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on August 24, 2013, 06:16:47 PM
Quote from: V3X on August 24, 2013, 06:34:44 AM
What I hate about the coverage about Manning seeking gender reassignment is that it comes in the slot reserved in the media for negative coverage about popular or iconic people in the news. They can't fault anything Manning did, especially if they talk about specifics. So instead they come out with this "oh and by the way Bradley Manning is queer and wants to be a woman" shit, because that's the "worst" they've got on her. So it disgusts me on one hand because it's basically a smear campaign, and on the other hand because a person's gender identity can be used to "smear" them in the first place. They're fooling the masses with their own ignorance, and while they're at it they're potentially doing a lot of damage to other people who have no connection to Manning other than their "atypical" gender identities.

See this is why I rarely post much around here.  V3X, and a good number of others basically articulate the way I typically feel inside so when it comes time to post something or not post something, it's usually just a matter of finding out who said it already.
Heh, i know that feeling.
Anyway, repitition is your friend! The quality of your opinions is not dependant on their originality. The quality comes from internal consistency and morality. Both of which you have ample amounts of in my opinion. I never ever caught you being inconsistent without you noticing it yourself. That is damn impressive. Have some pride in your own awesomeness. Anyone who can even occasionally keep up with the awesomeness that is PD (just ignore the nasty bits) deserves a Nobel prize. (In some cases inserted in a certain orifice.) Burns, you are  a god among gods, if you ever feel like you are not good enough: just remember that the lesser gods are still fukken awesome and you will always be better than hercules as depicted in the tv show.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 24, 2013, 09:08:40 PM
Yeah but it's more fun when you guys post anyway.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on August 24, 2013, 09:54:44 PM
Quote from: Suu on August 23, 2013, 04:15:50 PM
Boyfriend just came home early.

Me: "Wow, you're uh...really early today."

Him: "Yeah, we finished the class early."

Me: "Powerpoint presentation and then out?"

Him: "No...shipping personal goods."

Me: "...what?"

Him: "Yes, and the lady that was going to show us didn't show up."

Me: "Wait, they teach you how to ship packages in the Navy?!"

Him: *nods* "You have no idea what they fucking cover in C-School, it's a joke. And, once I move commands again, they have to teach me...AGAIN!"

Me: "Well...They certainly are, uh, thorough?"

Him: "Please, you should be there for the, 'So this tool is called a screwdriver' class."

Sad thing is they have to teach and re-teach these bullshit classes because some jackass will fuck things up like trying to use a screwdriver to unjam a printer that was incorrectly shipped overseas.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on August 25, 2013, 03:47:33 PM
Quote from: :regret: on August 24, 2013, 07:34:28 PM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on August 24, 2013, 06:16:47 PM
Quote from: V3X on August 24, 2013, 06:34:44 AM
What I hate about the coverage about Manning seeking gender reassignment is that it comes in the slot reserved in the media for negative coverage about popular or iconic people in the news. They can't fault anything Manning did, especially if they talk about specifics. So instead they come out with this "oh and by the way Bradley Manning is queer and wants to be a woman" shit, because that's the "worst" they've got on her. So it disgusts me on one hand because it's basically a smear campaign, and on the other hand because a person's gender identity can be used to "smear" them in the first place. They're fooling the masses with their own ignorance, and while they're at it they're potentially doing a lot of damage to other people who have no connection to Manning other than their "atypical" gender identities.

See this is why I rarely post much around here.  V3X, and a good number of others basically articulate the way I typically feel inside so when it comes time to post something or not post something, it's usually just a matter of finding out who said it already.
Heh, i know that feeling.
Anyway, repitition is your friend! The quality of your opinions is not dependant on their originality. The quality comes from internal consistency and morality. Both of which you have ample amounts of in my opinion. I never ever caught you being inconsistent without you noticing it yourself. That is damn impressive. Have some pride in your own awesomeness. Anyone who can even occasionally keep up with the awesomeness that is PD (just ignore the nasty bits) deserves a Nobel prize. (In some cases inserted in a certain orifice.) Burns, you are  a god among gods, if you ever feel like you are not good enough: just remember that the lesser gods are still fukken awesome and you will always be better than hercules as depicted in the tv show.

Thanks :) 

Although I don't usually feel like I'm not good enough.  Nipped that little demon a little while back :) 

I think what I'm getting at is that it's ultimately why I've stuck around for so long.  I have to add, however, that it's not always necessarily a case of others confirming my beliefs -- which is healthy.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 30, 2013, 04:07:34 AM
Villager's downstairs housemate, who's roommates with her BFF, via FB status:

Quote from: nickname pendingYou're so classless you could be a Marxist utopia.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on August 31, 2013, 07:55:30 AM
Zone chat on the Klingon Homeworld just now:

Jokerz@jokerrzz: can you please give me some cash
Jokerz@jokerrzz: for the lion
Jokerz@jokerrzz: I cant afford it
Jokerz@jokerrzz: and i am broke
TRAIdeathNING@motpoetryion1: how much are rename tokens?
Jokerz@jokerrzz: :(
Mock@modemfox: but you can find most of them on echance as non-combat pets
Jokerz@jokerrzz: I know I am asking for a lot
Jokerz@jokerrzz: but please'
Jokerz@jokerrzz: I am begging you right now
Jokerz@jokerrzz: Please
@kalkofen has logged off.
[GameplayAnnounce] Imperial Leather@sgtrobb has acquired an Elachi S'golth Escort!
IH'qul@mistertwid: Panhandler on Qo'Nos. I've seen everything now.
Mock@modemfox: lol
Lysu Milias@sh1fthf: lol
Jokerz@jokerrzz: Please ?
Mock@modemfox: new players
Lysu Milias@sh1fthf: I bought this pos
Jokerz@jokerrzz: I really want the lion
Jokerz@jokerrzz: Please
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 31, 2013, 08:37:37 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on August 24, 2013, 09:54:44 PM
Quote from: Suu on August 23, 2013, 04:15:50 PM
Boyfriend just came home early.

Me: "Wow, you're uh...really early today."

Him: "Yeah, we finished the class early."

Me: "Powerpoint presentation and then out?"

Him: "No...shipping personal goods."

Me: "...what?"

Him: "Yes, and the lady that was going to show us didn't show up."

Me: "Wait, they teach you how to ship packages in the Navy?!"

Him: *nods* "You have no idea what they fucking cover in C-School, it's a joke. And, once I move commands again, they have to teach me...AGAIN!"

Me: "Well...They certainly are, uh, thorough?"

Him: "Please, you should be there for the, 'So this tool is called a screwdriver' class."

Sad thing is they have to teach and re-teach these bullshit classes because some jackass will fuck things up like trying to use a screwdriver to unjam a printer that was incorrectly shipped overseas.

Yeah, but have yeah had them following your dinner like oh fuck really

oh
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 31, 2013, 08:38:55 AM
Quote from: Surprise Happy Endings Whether You Want Them Or Not on August 31, 2013, 08:37:37 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on August 24, 2013, 09:54:44 PM
Quote from: Suu on August 23, 2013, 04:15:50 PM
Boyfriend just came home early.

Me: "Wow, you're uh...really early today."

Him: "Yeah, we finished the class early."

Me: "Powerpoint presentation and then out?"

Him: "No...shipping personal goods."

Me: "...what?"

Him: "Yes, and the lady that was going to show us didn't show up."

Me: "Wait, they teach you how to ship packages in the Navy?!"

Him: *nods* "You have no idea what they fucking cover in C-School, it's a joke. And, once I move commands again, they have to teach me...AGAIN!"

Me: "Well...They certainly are, uh, thorough?"

Him: "Please, you should be there for the, 'So this tool is called a screwdriver' class."

Sad thing is they have to teach and re-teach these bullshit classes because some jackass will fuck things up like trying to use a screwdriver to unjam a printer that was incorrectly shipped overseas.

Yeah, but have yeah had them following your dinner like oh fuck really

oh

Then oh come on really.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on September 06, 2013, 02:31:31 AM
Twid facebook status: Little tired. I have a small to do list, but I'm going to blink at the screen for a bit first.

Twidcousin: To do lists make me pull a blanket over my head.

Twid: Not me. I like making lists. I just don't like them telling me what to do. I'm like a deity. I bring lists into being and then ignore them until they fade away.

Twid: "It's Sunday! Didn't I tell you to keep holy the Sabbath by not doing anything? By the way, the Sabbath is 7 days long."

Twid-ex: Wait, does that mean I don't need to do chores for a week?? What say you MrPastorFriend?

Twid: I can answer for him. You're an atheist. You must do chores everyday.

Twid-ex: Awww. D:

Twid: SOMEONE has to listen to the list.

Twid: Hey MrPastorFriend, take the week off. You're a holy man.

Twid: You too, MrsPastorFriendWhoWasOrdainedFirst

Twid-ex: So wait, this is like my punishment? Work for the unbelieving? Crap. Hey MrPastorFriend, got some water?

Twid: Atheists go to Hell. Hell is unwashed dishes and a pile of laundry.

Twid: What, you want fire and brimstone instead? You can go to the heavy metal concert after you take out your trash, mop the floors and throw away the questionably expired food.

Twid: I'm feeling weirdly creative. Might have to put another item on the list.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 11, 2013, 12:47:04 AM
From one of the many Portland hate blogs:

QuoteSnell Snipper
on September 9, 2013 at 3:33 pm said:
1. The weather kills me. I am so sick of wet ankles and wet shoes and crappy hair.
2. Umbrellas are retarded. They just blow inside out. I went through 10 one winter. I am defeated and give up.
3. People drive like assholes. Stop driving slow in the fast lane.
4. The passive aggression is out of control.
5. The Portlandia show makes me want to barf. Not funny.
6. The white people complaining about "gentrification" and claiming that they are not a part of the gentrification because they have lived here longer than you
7. The words Sustainability and green. Barf
8. All of the apartments/condos being built without the proper amount of parking
9. Its true, people dress like they just rolled out of bed
10. Anarchist, Slacker kids
11. Grocery stores such as New Seasons and Whole Foods where the clerks and the customers act like they are better than you
12. The crappy school system. 40% drop out rate
13. Bikers who pass other bikers right in front of your car without looking. Seriously, are you retarded? Are you trying to ruin my day? I don't want to be traumatized by running over a biker. Pay attention.
14. Entitlement
15. There is nothing going on downtown Portland
16. Why can't I buy my ticket on the MAX train? Why isn't anybody checking your ticket?
17. Why can't you people drive in the snow?
18. Driving in the rain
19. Suburban commuters
20. Conservative people who leave comments on blogs
21. Parades
22. intersections without stop signs
23. The ON ramp from the Morrison Bridge onto I5North. Seriously, who was on crack when making that decision.
24. Nobody gives a shit about East Portland. Its super ghetto w/ gravel roads
25. Racism
26. The cost of living has skyrocketed but our salaries have not gone up
27. Most of the local politicians are gross. Yuck.   

I love #2.  :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on September 11, 2013, 01:05:37 AM
Quote from: Facemeat on August 31, 2013, 08:38:55 AM
Quote from: Surprise Happy Endings Whether You Want Them Or Not on August 31, 2013, 08:37:37 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on August 24, 2013, 09:54:44 PM
Quote from: Suu on August 23, 2013, 04:15:50 PM
Boyfriend just came home early.

Me: "Wow, you're uh...really early today."

Him: "Yeah, we finished the class early."

Me: "Powerpoint presentation and then out?"

Him: "No...shipping personal goods."

Me: "...what?"

Him: "Yes, and the lady that was going to show us didn't show up."

Me: "Wait, they teach you how to ship packages in the Navy?!"

Him: *nods* "You have no idea what they fucking cover in C-School, it's a joke. And, once I move commands again, they have to teach me...AGAIN!"

Me: "Well...They certainly are, uh, thorough?"

Him: "Please, you should be there for the, 'So this tool is called a screwdriver' class."

Sad thing is they have to teach and re-teach these bullshit classes because some jackass will fuck things up like trying to use a screwdriver to unjam a printer that was incorrectly shipped overseas.

Yeah, but have yeah had them following your dinner like oh fuck really

oh

Then oh come on really.

What?

So much what?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on September 11, 2013, 08:05:51 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on September 11, 2013, 01:05:37 AM
Quote from: Facemeat on August 31, 2013, 08:38:55 AM
Quote from: Surprise Happy Endings Whether You Want Them Or Not on August 31, 2013, 08:37:37 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on August 24, 2013, 09:54:44 PM
Quote from: Suu on August 23, 2013, 04:15:50 PM
Boyfriend just came home early.

Me: "Wow, you're uh...really early today."

Him: "Yeah, we finished the class early."

Me: "Powerpoint presentation and then out?"

Him: "No...shipping personal goods."

Me: "...what?"

Him: "Yes, and the lady that was going to show us didn't show up."

Me: "Wait, they teach you how to ship packages in the Navy?!"

Him: *nods* "You have no idea what they fucking cover in C-School, it's a joke. And, once I move commands again, they have to teach me...AGAIN!"

Me: "Well...They certainly are, uh, thorough?"

Him: "Please, you should be there for the, 'So this tool is called a screwdriver' class."

Sad thing is they have to teach and re-teach these bullshit classes because some jackass will fuck things up like trying to use a screwdriver to unjam a printer that was incorrectly shipped overseas.

Yeah, but have yeah had them following your dinner like oh fuck really

oh

Then oh come on really.

What?

So much what?
Oh really following your have but.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 11, 2013, 08:42:47 PM
Via Cordelia The Enucleator:

Quote
Boss: What are you eating?
Cordelia: Yogurt with grape nuts.
B: Oh my god, I thought it was gravy.
C: Actually it is. I'm an American. It's my birthright to sit in my office and eat a bowl of sausage gravy with a spoon, and no one can take that away from me. Especially not today. ESPECIALLY not today.
B: I can't believe you just said that.
C: (spooning yogurt into her face) Never forget, boss.

I just realized that Cordelia is like the Roger of eyeballs.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:17:22 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 08:42:47 PM
Via Cordelia The Enucleator:

Quote
Boss: What are you eating?
Cordelia: Yogurt with grape nuts.
B: Oh my god, I thought it was gravy.
C: Actually it is. I'm an American. It's my birthright to sit in my office and eat a bowl of sausage gravy with a spoon, and no one can take that away from me. Especially not today. ESPECIALLY not today.
B: I can't believe you just said that.
C: (spooning yogurt into her face) Never forget, boss.

I just realized that Cordelia is like the Roger of eyeballs.

I think Cordelia is AWESOME, based on what you've said about her, and what I've seen of her on Facebook.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 11, 2013, 09:27:12 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:17:22 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 08:42:47 PM
Via Cordelia The Enucleator:

Quote
Boss: What are you eating?
Cordelia: Yogurt with grape nuts.
B: Oh my god, I thought it was gravy.
C: Actually it is. I'm an American. It's my birthright to sit in my office and eat a bowl of sausage gravy with a spoon, and no one can take that away from me. Especially not today. ESPECIALLY not today.
B: I can't believe you just said that.
C: (spooning yogurt into her face) Never forget, boss.

I just realized that Cordelia is like the Roger of eyeballs.

I think Cordelia is AWESOME, based on what you've said about her, and what I've seen of her on Facebook.

She is. RAD RAD RAD. Also if you ever make it out I hope to introduce the two of you so I can see what happens when the universe implodes from sheer terror.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:28:34 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 09:27:12 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:17:22 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 08:42:47 PM
Via Cordelia The Enucleator:

Quote
Boss: What are you eating?
Cordelia: Yogurt with grape nuts.
B: Oh my god, I thought it was gravy.
C: Actually it is. I'm an American. It's my birthright to sit in my office and eat a bowl of sausage gravy with a spoon, and no one can take that away from me. Especially not today. ESPECIALLY not today.
B: I can't believe you just said that.
C: (spooning yogurt into her face) Never forget, boss.

I just realized that Cordelia is like the Roger of eyeballs.

I think Cordelia is AWESOME, based on what you've said about her, and what I've seen of her on Facebook.

She is. RAD RAD RAD. Also if you ever make it out I hope to introduce the two of you so I can see what happens when the universe implodes from sheer terror.

HOT DOG!  But I'm wearing goggles.  You can't be too careful.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 11, 2013, 09:30:01 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:28:34 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 09:27:12 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:17:22 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 08:42:47 PM
Via Cordelia The Enucleator:

Quote
Boss: What are you eating?
Cordelia: Yogurt with grape nuts.
B: Oh my god, I thought it was gravy.
C: Actually it is. I'm an American. It's my birthright to sit in my office and eat a bowl of sausage gravy with a spoon, and no one can take that away from me. Especially not today. ESPECIALLY not today.
B: I can't believe you just said that.
C: (spooning yogurt into her face) Never forget, boss.

I just realized that Cordelia is like the Roger of eyeballs.

I think Cordelia is AWESOME, based on what you've said about her, and what I've seen of her on Facebook.

She is. RAD RAD RAD. Also if you ever make it out I hope to introduce the two of you so I can see what happens when the universe implodes from sheer terror.

HOT DOG!  But I'm wearing goggles.  You can't be too careful.

That's a very, very good idea. I hear that when she goes in she's so fast you can't even see her move.

Well, and then you don't see anything ever again.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:37:33 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 09:30:01 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:28:34 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 09:27:12 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 11, 2013, 09:17:22 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 11, 2013, 08:42:47 PM
Via Cordelia The Enucleator:

Quote
Boss: What are you eating?
Cordelia: Yogurt with grape nuts.
B: Oh my god, I thought it was gravy.
C: Actually it is. I'm an American. It's my birthright to sit in my office and eat a bowl of sausage gravy with a spoon, and no one can take that away from me. Especially not today. ESPECIALLY not today.
B: I can't believe you just said that.
C: (spooning yogurt into her face) Never forget, boss.

I just realized that Cordelia is like the Roger of eyeballs.

I think Cordelia is AWESOME, based on what you've said about her, and what I've seen of her on Facebook.

She is. RAD RAD RAD. Also if you ever make it out I hope to introduce the two of you so I can see what happens when the universe implodes from sheer terror.

HOT DOG!  But I'm wearing goggles.  You can't be too careful.

That's a very, very good idea. I hear that when she goes in she's so fast you can't even see her move.

Well, and then you don't see anything ever again.

On the other hand, I could have her make them DETACHABLE, so I could LITERALLY throw them at my wife's ass.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 12, 2013, 10:39:29 PM
Sister: *Sends pic of stormy sky* I found Mt. Olympus.
Me: What did you do to piss off Zeus?
Sister: I didn't, it's sunny near me.
Me: Great, he's trying to impregnate you. Watch for showers of gold.
Sister: No gold here, however, I wouldn't mind that terribly. I could give birth to a demigod.
Me: True...but he could end up with some bad powers.
Sister: Unlikely, I'm pretty fucking awesome.
Sister: ...I can't believe we're talking about this. There is something fundamentally wrong with us.
Me: I'm a classics minor, I have an excuse. You're just a nerd.
Sister: So true.
Me: Though I admit, if I have to give birth to a demigod, I'd want to be by Ares. God of war and all that.
Sister: Good one, not sure who I would go with.
Me: Apollo and Hermes are both known and noted manwhores.
Sister: Yes, but I don't think I could fuck Hermes, the winged boots...they could flap when he gets excited.
Me: I...just...I...
Sister: I JUST BROKE YOUR BRAIN WITH HERMESEX.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 14, 2013, 06:04:47 PM
Actually seen on Facebook yesterday:

QuoteWho's Vladimir Putin? Is he a politician?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on September 14, 2013, 06:33:27 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 14, 2013, 06:04:47 PM
Actually seen on Facebook yesterday:

QuoteWho's Vladimir Putin? Is he a politician?

Very nice.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 14, 2013, 08:09:00 PM
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on September 14, 2013, 06:33:27 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 14, 2013, 06:04:47 PM
Actually seen on Facebook yesterday:

QuoteWho's Vladimir Putin? Is he a politician?

Very nice.  :lulz:

I liked it so much I went back and screenshotted it.

The guy who said it is a 60-something year old friend of my uncle, and he wasn't joking.  :horrormirth:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on September 14, 2013, 10:16:18 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 14, 2013, 08:09:00 PM
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on September 14, 2013, 06:33:27 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 14, 2013, 06:04:47 PM
Actually seen on Facebook yesterday:

QuoteWho's Vladimir Putin? Is he a politician?

Very nice.  :lulz:

I liked it so much I went back and screenshotted it.

The guy who said it is a 60-something year old friend of my uncle, and he wasn't joking.  :horrormirth:

That is really . . . it should be scary but it's just  :horrormirth: at this point. Wow.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on September 15, 2013, 10:41:08 PM
Quote from: What The Fox Say on September 15, 2013, 08:36:07 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 15, 2013, 12:51:18 PM
http://io9.com/meet-the-mysterious-men-behind-oklahomas-monument-to-a-1265330944

QuoteEric Piper and J. David Osbourne aren't cultists (that we know of), by they did build a 300-lb. monument to the dark Lovecraftian god Azathoth and left it on the lawn of the unsuspecting Paseo Grill in Oklahoma City two weeks ago. Curious whether this was some kind of art project or a sign of the end times in which humanity will descend into gibbering madness, we decided to get the answers straight from Piper and Osbourne themselves.

Uh huh.  Not cultists.  Sure.  We believe you, honest.

:lulz: I love those guys. I love artists, the kind of artists who do weird shit JUST BECAUSE.

BECAUSE ART PLUS FUCK YOU, THAT'S WHY.

:lulz:  This idea intrigues me...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 15, 2013, 11:11:23 PM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on October 08, 2013, 01:01:21 PM
A friend just wrote this on Facebook:
Quote"I understand that I should avoid subjectivity, and strive for objectivity in ex.phil (intro to philosophy course, obligatory in most higher education in Norway).

Does anyone know a more objective way to write this: "Thus, Descartes molests his own philosophy with a giant penis, which he terms God."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 08, 2013, 06:47:55 PM
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on October 08, 2013, 01:01:21 PM
A friend just wrote this on Facebook:
Quote"I understand that I should avoid subjectivity, and strive for objectivity in ex.phil (intro to philosophy course, obligatory in most higher education in Norway).

Does anyone know a more objective way to write this: "Thus, Descartes molests his own philosophy with a giant penis, which he terms God."

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 10, 2013, 02:48:43 AM
Via text:

Me: When we get old and wrinkly and gross im going to make it a point to call you granny or gran like its the word baby or babe much to the discomfort of everyone.
Me: Maybe use the euphemism sand you down for sex.
Villager: Aeee
Me: It will be hilarious for us. :) imagine me doing a blues song. Hey there granny why dont you sand my dowel x 3/we so dry granny we dont need no towel
Villager: Lol!
Me: Our kids are going to hate us lol. Or well me specifically.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 19, 2013, 04:15:13 AM
Blight status: Dear City of Somerville. It's fucking midnight, and this is a residential neighborhood. Tell your blokes that their road machinery is loud and running at a highly inappropriate time and it's time to clock out and go home. Sincerely, guy whose room faces the street.

Blight: Not that I'm in the habit of going to sleep at midnight, but it is midterms week, and other people aren't insomniacs like I am.

Libertarian friend: they'll prolly be working until 5 am...sorry

Blight: Talking to the cop who's blocking the intersection with his cruiser helps expedite things.

Blight: Actually, the cop seemed annoyed. Probably did him a favor, since a resident was politely saying fuck off.

Libertarian friend: well good luck...they always do loud things at bad times...try having to sleep during the day o_O

Paulbot friend: Roads are more important

Villager: Roads are important, but can be worked on during normal not-disturbing-the-peace hours. And this is a side street, not a vital through-way.

Paulbot: And what information are you basig this on?

Paulbot: There is a reason those guys are working at that time. And its not just to inconvenience the public.

Villager: True, maybe there was an emergency. Kevin needs his sleep though.

Blight [after waking up]: Hold on. Let me just take a moment to laugh at the fact that a libertarian just said roads are important. Ahem. Hehehehehehehehehehehehe

Villager: Wait, you're a libertarian and you support the government building of a road that interferes with Kevin's individual right to a good night's sleep?

Blight: Hehehehehehehehehehehe

Blight: No, he's a libertarian saying that he supports the government building of a road. Period. That's where the funny is. It interfering with my individual rights is just whipped cream and cherries.

Villager: Wait, no. Kevin you must be wrong. [Paulbot]'s profile indicates that he works for the City. How can one be a City employee but a Libertarian? That's like...being a Libertarian but being employed by a government, for lack of a better example.

Blight: lol, good question.

Blight: It's only socialism if someone else is doing.

Paulbot: You ever wonder how long a car would last driving on a dirt road?

Paulbot: Or how much more money a road costs to build in the winter?

Paulbot: Its just simple economics. Not a very significant political statement. But hey, its your tax money. Go tell those guys to take their sweet ass time

Blight: lol

Blight: So what youre saying is that routine maintenance is a good thing? Sounds like obamapave.

Canadian socialist friend: ^^ lmfao. Obamapave.

Blight: Yeah that ones a keeper i think. Going to have to use that one again.

Blight: Lol snakes on a flag: "dont drive on me"

Blight: Now of course im thinking up more obamathings. Free office coffee- obamajoe. Wic groceries- obamafood. Emergency alert system- obamalarm.

Villager: Protection of endangered species: obamafauna

Blight: The police- obamacops. The fire department- obamadouse. Paramedics- obambulance

Blight: State university- obamaschool arboretums- obamatrees

Paulbot: Wow

Blight: Even in Chicago, you're still able to entertain me, sir.

Blight: But to get back to the question I posed, you are in fact in favor of tax paid road maintenance to offset later societal costs of having crap roads, but against compulsory healthcare which will lead to my tax dollars not having to pay for emergency room visits, correct? Just making sure.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Forsooth on October 19, 2013, 04:34:57 AM
"Throwing money at a problem never works, unless you are Ted Kennedy and you have drowned an innocent girl."


from a high school history teacher of mine
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 19, 2013, 04:39:55 AM
Dear God, Paulbot is providing more and more lulz....
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 19, 2013, 04:42:41 AM
OBAMAFAUNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me the other day during a conversation about synesthesia with my synesthete friend I decided that one of the reasons I liked poetry was the way certain words and combinations of words had pleasing mouthfeels which led to

QuoteReciting poetry is like making out with the poet
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 19, 2013, 05:24:22 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on October 19, 2013, 04:42:41 AM
OBAMAFAUNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me the other day during a conversation about synesthesia with my synesthete friend I decided that one of the reasons I liked poetry was the way certain words and combinations of words had pleasing mouthfeels which led to

QuoteReciting poetry is like making out with the poet

:spittake:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Don Coyote on October 19, 2013, 05:35:37 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 19, 2013, 05:24:22 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on October 19, 2013, 04:42:41 AM
OBAMAFAUNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me the other day during a conversation about synesthesia with my synesthete friend I decided that one of the reasons I liked poetry was the way certain words and combinations of words had pleasing mouthfeels which led to

QuoteReciting poetry is like making out with the poet

:spittake:

Keep that in mind next time you have to read Shakespeare.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on October 19, 2013, 05:36:32 AM
-
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on October 19, 2013, 06:09:25 AM
Now I'm going to have an awkward experience of reading Nigel's Laments out loud...


Sorry, Nigel. But I kinda wanna make out with you.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on October 19, 2013, 06:16:08 AM
lol, Star Wars episode V: Paulbot Strikes Back:

Paulbot: Roads and infrastructure are a necessity to allow the populus to go to work efficiently everyday to generate personal income and income tax revenue. It has no comparison to healthcare.
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Actually, it does have comparison. A pretty apt one, I might add.
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: Since, you know, properly functioning bodies are necessary to go to work efficiently.
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: Ideally, people would use these roads to go to their workplace that provides healthcare coverage
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Oh, so you are in fact in favor of workers having affordable, preferably work provided, healthcare so that they can work and produce personal income and tax revenue?
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: A necessity, even?
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: Not really. Because you can't associate the wear and tear a road recieves and what types of wear and tear a human encounters. Nevermind the bodies natural ability to heal itself of many ailments. Those assholes keeping you up at night. Lets call them white blood cells
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: So, ability to travel to work is important, but ability to work is not?
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: So much for efficiency.
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: The governments job is to provide infrastructure so that individuals and business have a environment to thrive in.
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Let's frame it this way- You can up and redo a road entirely. Human bodies do in fact have points of no return, despite our resilience biologically.
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: So, what you are saying is that the purpose of government is to facilitate business, but not the citizenry?
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: And that laissez-faire capitalism benefits the average worker?
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: And that the average worker thrives?
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: What about those who have the ability to work and chose not to?
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: "And what information are you basig this on?"-Paulbot
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: You ever been unemployed?
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: I already know the answer to that.
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: Another thing, as a 11 year tax payer and someone who has paid for his health insurance and maintained his health, why do I suddenly have to pay more money for less coverage? How is that fair?
about an hour ago via mobile · Like · 1

Paulbot: Unemployed, yes. But have paid income taxes. I also just had a kid without health insurance, and you know what I did, I paid for it
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Well, as 16 year taxpayer, who lucked out not getting terribly sick, why do I have to pay more money, through the same insurance plan I've had for years and years, once the libertarians coopted the Republican party and stormed congress?
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: Even though Romneycare kicked in long before that.
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: Fyi, obamacare is causong the price hikes
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Of course it is. Now we are forced by capitalism to purchase something. Something that every other developed nation in the world provides for their citizens as part of being a citizen. You might look upthread about Canadian socialist friend laughing about Obamapave. She's Canadian.
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: Romneycare applied to a small sample size. Massachusetts, a small well to do state on the east coast, your tax dollars could afford to cover those uncovered. One size fits all does not apply to nationwide healthcare plan
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: I don't like Obamacare either, but for entirely different reasons. The same reasons which made me think Romney was a corporate jackass.
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: Sure, you know if the libertarian leaning states actually taxed their citizens at an appropriate rate, people like Massholes wouldn't have to cover their deficits with our own taxes that we never see anything for.
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: If friggin' Alabama picked up more of their slack, MA taxes would be spent more on MA.
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: So who's the moocher now?
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: And I'm guessing that Illinois is doing the same as Massachusetts. Paying for other states that would otherwise be third world countries.
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: Illinois is broke. Our state is underwater, and now we have this
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Thank the Confederacy for that.
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: You do realize that, yes? That freeloading states are causing us to pay more in taxes just to keep the nation as a whole somewhat, barely, affloat?
about an hour ago · Like

Paulbot: And by the way, you never aswered MY question on why I should now pay more for health insurance, why am I being punished for the good of people who have gone without insurance ?
about an hour ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Are you, in fact, being punished for the otherwise uninsured? Do you actually understand what PPACA is about?
about an hour ago · Like

Blight: If we actually had universal healthcare, and not compulsory purchasing, you might have a leg to stand on.
59 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: That's where your wrong and why you think we can have this healthcare system, you think or government is afloat. Its not. We are going backwards. Like I have said before, universal healthcare sounds great, but we can't afford it, our wars, and other useless expenditures
58 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Of course we can't afford Universal Healthcare, that's why we do not have it. Is the government paying for your healthcare?
57 minutes ago · Like

Blight: I will agree with you about the wars though.
57 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: Hi , I'm hold a license in health insurance. Do YOU actually know how insurance works and is funded?
57 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Hey, insurance guy, quick question. Is the government paying for our insurance or forcing us to buy it?
56 minutes ago · Like

Blight: And if it's not the latter, then how is YOUR bottom line being affected? By, you know, the AFFORDABLE part?
55 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: Its not affordable. Wait till you have A co pay or a deductible to pay. You'll see where all those savings went
53 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Paulbot: Once again, you don't know anything about insurance
53 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Paulbot: I can call a black cat red, but its still a black cat
52 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Of course it's not affordable. It's not paid for by the government, and people who draft these laws don't know what it's like to be a normal person. How much do you pay for insurance?
52 minutes ago · Like

Blight: Before the goddamn teabaggers got into Congress, my insurance, for health, vision, and dental, was about $16 a week, through work. Then it jumped up to $86 per week. I work for a goddamn hospital.
51 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: Nevermind the fact that the coverages offered are fucking ludicrous compared to a what I have been getting for the last 10 years
50 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Hey, my coverage is fine, and my copays reasonable, even though I'm paying about $70 more a week than before.
50 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: My coverage for Paulbot-fiancee, the girls, and myself is 75 a week.
49 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: So it's about the same. What was it like before the anarchists took over the legislature?
49 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: What makes you think that working at hospital gives you better insurance rates
49 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Except, you know, I work for a hospital and I'm paying for just me, not Villager and non-existent kids.
48 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: Its not even close to the same. Go tell your work you just had 2 kids and see how much your insurance goes up
47 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Well, it would be logical, no? I mean, I'm working for the organization to begin with. Sure, I get seen a little quicker.
47 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: If I did have dependants, my health insurance is free
47 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Wait, let's revisit this. A father in a family of 4 pays $75 for insurance. A single man pays $86. And if I have dependents, my insurance goes up? Even though you are paying less? And you do have dependents. You're a father of 2.
46 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: Yep. Its called "how its supposed to be"
43 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Paulbot: You pay more for health insurance than I do
43 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: So... you're contradicting yourself, no?
43 minutes ago · Like

Blight: Wait, no, ok, I got it now.
42 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: You know, you can switch employers, better benefits is great reason to change jobs
42 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Well, that's why I'm back in college. But you know, it doesn't change the fact that I am fundamentally against the idea of compulsory purchasing for a product that every other developed nation in the world provides to their citizens as a given.
41 minutes ago · Like

Blight: I hate PPACA because it's forcing people to buy something. If you're going to insist that someone has something, well, then, you better give it to them.
40 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: I hate to tell you, health insurance is not free in other countries, its just not deducted from your paycheck. Look at sales tax/exchange rates in those countries.
36 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Paulbot: Plus, our quality of healthcare is top notch.
36 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Paulbot: The government pays the hospitals and the doctors with tax noney.
35 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: LOL
30 minutes ago · Like

Blight: So, wait, sales tax is the same as insurance? Canadian socialist friend, you're from one of those goddamn Commie countries, please to tell more.
29 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: http://articles.chicagotribune.com/...

Affordable Care Act: High deductibles could pinch consumers
articles.chicagotribune.com
Adam Weldzius, a nurse practitioner, considers himself better informed than most...
See More
29 minutes ago via mobile · Like · Remove Preview

Blight: You know, especially since you're the next country over and your currency is roughly equivalent to ours.
28 minutes ago · Like

Blight: Peer review or GTFO.
28 minutes ago · Like

Blight: I don't trust the MSM. lol.
27 minutes ago · Like

Blight: I hear a lot about how Canada's system is broken. So I'm going to hand a Canuck the microphone.
26 minutes ago · Like

Phox: Kev, I'm truly fascinated by this, so I will inquire if I am missing something. Did you just post 4 times in a row, or is there something going on that I am unable to observe?
23 minutes ago · Like

Blight: 4x.
23 minutes ago · Like

Blight: Actually, Phox is Illinoisie too.
23 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: *healthcare is not free
23 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Paulbot: Healthcare is never free. Even if the government provides it, you're still paying for it through taxes. But... um.... it's cheaper if you do....
22 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: I agree. But that's not what we gave here
20 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Paulbot: Have*
19 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Of course it's not what we have here.
19 minutes ago · Like

Blight: :looks at watch:
19 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: That's why this is bullshit.
18 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Oh? And why is it bullshit? :Looks at watch:
17 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: They didn't reinvent the wheel, they took the same old one and removed a few spokes
17 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Spokes, you say? Elaborate on the spokes.
17 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: They actually have made insurance worse than it was before
17 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: And how did they make insurance worse?
16 minutes ago · Like

Blight: :looks at watch:
16 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: http://www.forbes.com/.../

How Obamacare Dramatically Increases The Cost of Insurance for Young Workers
www.forbes.com
In 2009, during the height of the debate over Obamacare, the law's architect, MI...
See More
8 minutes ago via mobile · Like · Remove Preview

Blight: Forbes.com
7 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: I'm done fyi.
7 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Mhmm.
7 minutes ago · Like

Paulbot: Read the damn article
7 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Blight: Forbes.com
6 minutes ago · Like

Blight: Peer review or GTFO.
6 minutes ago · Like

Blight: Forbes. The magazine for the rich and the "pre-rich:.
4 minutes ago · Like
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 04, 2013, 09:46:13 PM
I'm going to take the quote out of context of the conversation, but it's addressed to Twidsister, who is 17.

QuoteYou're almost an adult. I think its time you start saying what is best for you and not what others think is best for you. And THAT made me feel old little one.

My nickname for her is Little One, because of the stark age difference between her and Midsister and I.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 15, 2013, 08:15:17 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight...and I suppose that this is the most Jewish experience I will ever have, Lord. Talking to you, and getting no answer.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 15, 2013, 08:25:26 AM
I offer this quote to illustrate that believing is not easy.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on November 22, 2013, 04:43:04 PM
I can't take a 2 minute break on IRC without someone forcing me to work.  Today is just one of those days:

- yegha78tg joined
<yegha78tg>  YOU MAY BE WATCHED
<yegha78tg>WARNING       WARNING      WARNING,                       WARNING
<yegha78tg>WARNING             WARNING              WARNING,     WARNING         WARNING
<yegha78tg> YOU MAYWATCHED
<yegha78tg>YOU MAY BE WATCHED
<yegha78tg>   YOU MAY BE WATCHED
<yegha78tg>            )
<yegha78tg>Do usa&Israel use chat &facebook 2 spy?!?!?!?
<yegha78tg>Do they record &analyse everything we type?!?!?!?
<yegha78tg>Do usa&israel use chat&social communication prog(facebook&twitter) to collect informations,,,,can we call that spying!!!!
<yegha78tg>هل تستخدم امريكاواسرئيل الشات والفيس بوك للتجسس!؟!؟!؟!؟!؟!؟!
<Ixxie>Burns have you tried chill stuff in the more techhousy direction?
- yegha78tg left (Kicked by Cain with the foliowing reason: -)
<Ixxie>Can you kick it?
<Cain>its called Unit 8200 d00d
<Ixxie>YES YOU CAN!
<Cain>I mean, seriously, Wikipedia
<Cain>the real question is who ISN'T using facebook to spy on us
<Cain>I have money on North Korea, only because North Korea can't figure out the privacy options on it, having no concept of privacy as they do
<Cain>also their only computer is on timeshare between their hacking division and Kim Jong-Un's Call of Duty clan
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on November 22, 2013, 05:05:33 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on November 23, 2013, 05:16:34 AM
Rush Limbaugh seems to have a problem with article I, sec 5, clause 2 of the constitution.

AND a bit of a problem with inappropriate analogies.  Apparently, congress exerting it's constitutional ability to modify its procedural rules is RAPE.  No shit.

:lulz:

Quote from: WindbagLIMBAUGH: Let's forget the Senate for a minute. Let's say, let's take 10 people in a room and they're a group. And the room is made up of six men and four women. OK? The group has a rule that the men cannot rape the women. The group also has a rule that says any rule that will be changed must require six votes, of the 10, to change the rule. Every now and then, some lunatic in the group proposes to change the rule to allow women to be raped. But they never were able to get six votes for it.

There were always the four women voting against it and they always found two guys.Well, the guy that kept proposing that women be raped finally got tired of it, and he was in the majority and he was one that [said], 'You know what? We're going to change the rule. Now all we need is five." And well, 'you can't do that.' 'Yes we are. We're the majority. We're changing the rule.' And then they vote. Can the women be raped? Well, all it would take then is half of the room. You can change the rule to say three. You can change the rule to say three people want it, it's going to happen. There's no rule. When the majority can change the rules there aren't any.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on November 23, 2013, 05:31:36 AM
Oh, what the fuck.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on November 23, 2013, 05:33:13 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on November 23, 2013, 05:31:36 AM
Oh, what the fuck.

After all these years, the fat bastard is finally falling to the Ann Coulter Effect.   :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on November 23, 2013, 10:26:04 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on November 23, 2013, 05:16:34 AM
Rush Limbaugh seems to have a problem with article I, sec 5, clause 2 of the constitution.

AND a bit of a problem with inappropriate analogies.  Apparently, congress exerting it's constitutional ability to modify its procedural rules is RAPE.  No shit.

:lulz:

Quote from: WindbagLIMBAUGH: Let's forget the Senate for a minute. Let's say, let's take 10 people in a room and they're a group. And the room is made up of six men and four women. OK? The group has a rule that the men cannot rape the women. The group also has a rule that says any rule that will be changed must require six votes, of the 10, to change the rule. Every now and then, some lunatic in the group proposes to change the rule to allow women to be raped. But they never were able to get six votes for it.

There were always the four women voting against it and they always found two guys.Well, the guy that kept proposing that women be raped finally got tired of it, and he was in the majority and he was one that [said], 'You know what? We're going to change the rule. Now all we need is five." And well, 'you can't do that.' 'Yes we are. We're the majority. We're changing the rule.' And then they vote. Can the women be raped? Well, all it would take then is half of the room. You can change the rule to say three. You can change the rule to say three people want it, it's going to happen. There's no rule. When the majority can change the rules there aren't any.

Corey Robin puts it better, and with less hyperbole;

QuoteAs Phil Klinkner explained to me, and as this old Washington Post piece confirms, before this vote, senators representing a mere 11% of the population could block all presidential appointments and all legislation.

From now on, senators representing a mere 17% of the population can block most presidential appointments; senators representing 11% can still block all legislation and all Supreme Court nominees.

The march of democracy.

And to put that in perspective, it should never be forgotten that Bush had a 27% approval rating when he left office.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on November 23, 2013, 02:04:10 PM
Quote from: Cain on November 23, 2013, 10:26:04 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on November 23, 2013, 05:16:34 AM
Rush Limbaugh seems to have a problem with article I, sec 5, clause 2 of the constitution.

AND a bit of a problem with inappropriate analogies.  Apparently, congress exerting it's constitutional ability to modify its procedural rules is RAPE.  No shit.

:lulz:

Quote from: WindbagLIMBAUGH: Let's forget the Senate for a minute. Let's say, let's take 10 people in a room and they're a group. And the room is made up of six men and four women. OK? The group has a rule that the men cannot rape the women. The group also has a rule that says any rule that will be changed must require six votes, of the 10, to change the rule. Every now and then, some lunatic in the group proposes to change the rule to allow women to be raped. But they never were able to get six votes for it.

There were always the four women voting against it and they always found two guys.Well, the guy that kept proposing that women be raped finally got tired of it, and he was in the majority and he was one that [said], 'You know what? We're going to change the rule. Now all we need is five." And well, 'you can't do that.' 'Yes we are. We're the majority. We're changing the rule.' And then they vote. Can the women be raped? Well, all it would take then is half of the room. You can change the rule to say three. You can change the rule to say three people want it, it's going to happen. There's no rule. When the majority can change the rules there aren't any.

Corey Robin puts it better, and with less hyperbole;

QuoteAs Phil Klinkner explained to me, and as this old Washington Post piece confirms, before this vote, senators representing a mere 11% of the population could block all presidential appointments and all legislation.

From now on, senators representing a mere 17% of the population can block most presidential appointments; senators representing 11% can still block all legislation and all Supreme Court nominees.

The march of democracy.

And to put that in perspective, it should never be forgotten that Bush had a 27% approval rating when he left office.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but the Senate was never intended to function based on representation numbers. Its whole reason for existing is to balance the power between small rural states and large urban ones, so this kind of thing was always part of the plan. Not that it is necessarily a good plan.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on November 23, 2013, 04:00:10 PM
Oh, Corey Robin is well aware.  He's a professor of political science at NYU.  In fact, he once wrote (http://coreyrobin.com/2013/03/12/the-us-senate-where-democracy-goes-to-die/) on that very subject, noting:

QuoteAs Jack Rakove argued in Original Meanings, one of the reasons some delegates from large states ultimately came around to the idea of protecting the interests of small states was that they realized that an equal, if not more powerful, interest than mere population size bound delegate to delegate, state to state: slavery. Virginia had far more in common with South Carolina than it did with Massachussets, a fact that later events would go onto confirm. In Rakove's words:

QuoteThe more the delegates examined the apportionment of the lower house [which resulted in the infamous 3/5 clause], the more weight they gave to considerations of regional security. Rather than treat sectional differences as an alternative and superior description of the real interests at play in American politics, the delegates saw them instead as an additional conflict that had to be accommodated in order for the Union to endure. The apportionment issue confirmed the claims that the small states had made all along. It called attention not to the way in which an extended republic could protect all interests but to the need to safeguard the conspicuous interest of North and South. This defensive orientation in turn enabled even some large-state delegates to find merit in an equal-state vote.

As Madison, a firm opponent of representation by states, would argue at the Convention:

QuoteIt seemed now to be pretty well understood that the real difference of interests lay, not between large and small but between the Northern and Southern States. The institution of slavery and its consequences formed the line of discrimination."

True, Madison made this claim in the service of his argument against representation by states, but for others, his claim pushed in the opposite direction: a pluralism of interests in an extensive republic was not, as Madison claimed in Federalist 10, enough to protect the interests of a wealthy propertied minority.  Something more—the protection of group interests in the Senate—was required. (Which is why, incidentally, I'm always amused by conservatives' horror at the notion of group rights: what do they think the Senate is all about if not the protection of group rights? This is not to say that there aren't principled reasons to oppose group rights; I'm commenting merely on the scandalized tone of the opposition.)

And when one considers how critical the Senate has been to the protection of both slavery and Jim Crow—measures against both institutions repeatedly passed the House, only to be stymied in the Senate, where the interests of certain types of minorities are more protected than others—the distinction between race and state size becomes even harder to sustain. Though the Senate often gets held up as the institution for the protection of minority rights against majoritarian tyranny, the minorities it protects are often not the powerless or the dissenters of yore and lore.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 06, 2013, 05:02:09 PM
<Cram>sup eve
<Cram>how is your post-black friday life?
<Cain>my post cyber monday life is terrible
<Cain>I did so much cybering on Monday
<Cain>I even had cybersex with a chatbot (not you, Wilhelm)
<F-U-C-K-U-P>AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
<Cram>!comic
<Burns>!comic
<Burns>!comic
<F-U-C-K-U-P>Burns: Comic Here: http://imgur.com/4codoed
<F-U-C-K-U-P>Burns: Comic Here: http://imgur.com/cCvmwpc
<Burns>wtf comic mothafucka
<Cram>why did fuckup scream instead of wilhelm?
<Cain>Well, Wilhelm's not on
<Cain>unless I'm going blind from all the cybersex I had on cybermonday with my cyberhand
<Cram>you're going to get cyberhair on your cyberpalms
<Cain>damn right
* Burns did it
<Burns>so nightvale radio is amazing
<Cram>Yo after going down that Soul Bound Final Fantasy VII hole yesterday I have found myself watching Therian/Otherkin videos.
<Cram>I haven't actually gotten around to listening to Nightvale yet, but it's on the list
<Cain>Cainad has recommended it
<Cain>Nightvale, that is, not soulbonding
<Cain>though he probably would, that fucking furry sympathizer
<Cram>CAINAD IS A THERIAN YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST
<Cram>yifftastic
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 08, 2013, 08:55:09 PM
Those comics are amazing.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Sister_Gothique on December 13, 2013, 08:54:59 AM
J: If I were a cannibalistic serial killer, that's the first thing I'd buy.
SG: A caiman?!....I'd buy a deep freezer.
J: I'm just saying what we're all thinking here.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 15, 2013, 07:41:41 AM
A friend asked me about Vietnam for her history paper:

The Vietnamese voted for a Communist government. The United States intervened in free elections. Not out of interest for the will of the Vietnamese, but because the US would not tolerate the spread of Communism. The US was stuck between a rock and a hard place. American policy was to promote democracy and prevent the spread of Communism. Vietnam democratically chose Communism. But our priority was to prevent the spread of Communism so we said fuck democracy. That is one of the things that you must always remember about the United States. We will abandon our high minded principles if it suits us. We are, in fact, notorious for that. We don't actually care about democracy. We have supported dictatorships as long as they were pro-American. We still do. We only tolerate democracy in other countries so long as the government involved is pro-American, and pro-capitalist.

In fact, that is the most important, underlying theme to American history. How does this benefit the government, and the people who tend to get elected to office? And how can those people spin it in order to look like they are in favor of democracy? How, indeed, can politicians say that it is our duty to intervene in another country's affairs because we don't like it? How do you legitimize the death of our soldiers at that point?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on December 15, 2013, 10:45:07 AM
Actually, the "democracy" thing is entirely post-Reaganite feverish imaginings of the Neocons.

Look at NSC-68, or the Long Telegram.  There is no mention of spreading democracy or freedom to oppose Communism.  It was all containment, all the time.  The preferred US method was to support dictatorships, in South Korea, in South Vietnam, in Chile etc.

And there was never democracy in Vietnam.  It was a French colonial puppet and then, when the French admitted they had lost, it was partitioned into a Communist North and with an Emperor in the South, who was deposed by Ngo Dinh Diem and ruled as dictator.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on December 29, 2013, 04:49:35 AM
At the dinner table with my family yesterday we made up proverbs, one word at a time:

"Big words can often make small children scared"
"Because the world bleeds in sorrow when the horses cry, everybody wants to be together"
"The sun goat is making mischief. Mornings rarely tempt torturists."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 21, 2014, 05:33:37 PM
The boyfriend, referring to his engineering team:

QuoteThe sickness has flamed through their cube farm like salts through a goose.

I don't even know what that means, but it's positively lyrical. Dating a geek cowboy is full of moments.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on February 05, 2014, 03:12:40 AM
I realize he was a bit of a warmonger but this is pretty relevant for me atm...


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."


― Theodore Roosevelt
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on February 05, 2014, 08:53:02 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on February 05, 2014, 03:12:40 AM
I realize he was a bit of a warmonger but this is pretty relevant for me atm...


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."


― Theodore Roosevelt
This explains the rampant apathy about the horribleness that is reality when combined with 'Everyone is a critic now.' No-one actually does anything anymore, we all just post about it on facebook.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on February 07, 2014, 03:51:06 PM
Actual text I just received from a number I don't know:

"He came in me again last night. :) :) "

My response, "Well, I hope you're using a condom. You have the wrong number."

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on February 08, 2014, 03:28:02 PM
Quote from: :regret: on February 05, 2014, 08:53:02 AM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on February 05, 2014, 03:12:40 AM
I realize he was a bit of a warmonger but this is pretty relevant for me atm...


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."


― Theodore Roosevelt
This explains the rampant apathy about the horribleness that is reality when combined with 'Everyone is a critic now.' No-one actually does anything anymore, we all just post about it on facebook.

totally....I'm now gonna this on facebook

Quote from: The Suu on February 07, 2014, 03:51:06 PM
Actual text I just received from a number I don't know:

"He came in me again last night. :) :) "

My response, "Well, I hope you're using a condom. You have the wrong number."



:lulz:

maybe it's one of those home automated garages that send out updates.


Burns,
always looking on the denial side of life.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Sister_Gothique on February 12, 2014, 04:08:49 AM
Dolphins are the Ted Bundy of the sea.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on February 12, 2014, 04:19:15 AM
Quote from: The Suu on February 07, 2014, 03:51:06 PM
Actual text I just received from a number I don't know:

"He came in me again last night. :) :) "

My response, "Well, I hope you're using a condom. You have the wrong number."

I've been trying for the last couple of days to conjure a scenario where that isn't a completely scary thing to text someone. But I can't come up with ANY non-fucked-up explanations for why someone would text that to someone else.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on March 28, 2014, 05:46:19 AM
Some old yuppie lady:
Where's that from?

Me:
:?

Her:
Your tattoo, Give Me Freedom.

Me:
Or Kil Me, *point to my other arm*

Her:
Oh! *turns away horrified*

Me:
*lean in behind her*
Lee Harvy Oswald said that.

Her:
*a solid mass of pure terror that won't face me*
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on March 28, 2014, 11:43:38 AM
You're a bad man, and you do bad things.


:thumb:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: hooplala on March 28, 2014, 01:40:49 PM
That story brought me great joy.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 28, 2014, 04:34:23 PM
Quote from: Alty on March 28, 2014, 05:46:19 AM
Me:
*lean in behind her*
Lee Harvy Oswald said that.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 31, 2014, 09:31:22 PM
"There's nothing like the sound of a child's laughter, unless it's 3am and you have no children."
- Vicky, at work.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 08, 2014, 05:26:34 PM
QuoteThe first rule of throwing grenades is that WE DO NOT THROW GRENADES UPHILL.

WHY DO I EVEN HAVE TO SAY THIS?

Howl to Squiddy, Facebook.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: CorbeauEtRenard on April 11, 2014, 04:09:47 AM
The culmination of a three-day-long facebook argument over why paying poor workers won't make everything too expensive for anyone to buy, shortly after I restated my entire point in the form of a word question with silly unit names since he kept accusing me of "just guessing" what the numbers in my hypothetical examples were...

Lolbertarian: How did the number of items produced increase by 50% if we just raised wages without adding workers?
Witness: That's the thing you keep missing, dude. Figure it out. Why would a company have to make more things? Could it be demand rises because there's more money in the pockets of consumers? No way.

Me: Uh... number of units produced didn't change because it didn't need to. I mean, in the future, the fact that more of Fakey McNotARealProduct will be purchased means a larger market and more total profits to the company (even at the same 10 gloobort profit margin) means they will *eventually* expand and produce more (and that will necessitate hiring more martian workers), but the increase in buying power happens FIRST and DRIVES the business expansion, not as a result.

Lolbertarian: Raising workers wages isn't going to increase output without adding more workers. If you added more workers, then the labor cost increase is more than 50% because some of them come in with the new full salary., not the old salary.

Me: Also, work on your word-problem skills. Nowhere in that example did it say number of items increased 50%. It said glooborts paid to the martian workers increased 50%.

Witness: yes, because we live in the 18th century

Lolbertarian: Your words, cut and pasted, "That is a 25% increase in the final price of Fakey McNotARealProduct, but the workers are making 50% more glooborts." It specifically says they are making 50% more items. My word problem skills seem fine.

Me: Output increases as a result of increase buying that results from increased buying power. The increase in buying power happens first, as the math clearly shows.
Me: Glooborts are the MONEY. Fakey McNotARealProduct is the item.
Me: Pay attention, man.

Witness: oh my god what did i just witness i can't stop laughing
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Junkenstein on April 11, 2014, 07:02:55 AM
5/5. Well played.

For fun, you may want to mention Ford and their idea of paying their workers more + discounted cars for workers = many more cars made/sold.

No other car manufacturers followed suit on that one at all.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 16, 2014, 01:16:07 AM
"Coffee is like angels farting rainbows into my mouth."
- Hamish Howl, preaching to the atheists.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 19, 2014, 06:49:38 PM
I cannot stop laughing.

QuoteDelivery or carryout?
-Carryout.
What's your name?
-Cordelia.
What?
-Cordelia. C o r
Ter..what?
-C O R D
Terdillion??
-Jake. J a k e.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on May 09, 2014, 02:15:37 PM
My mom actually posted this on my Facebook page.

(http://i.imgur.com/Uuih83Ml.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on May 09, 2014, 02:32:51 PM
I like your mom.




















:lmnuendo:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on May 09, 2014, 02:42:23 PM
She kicked our asses in Cards Against Humanity during Christmas vacation. My father was horrified and had to leave the room.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 09, 2014, 02:47:20 PM
When someone else posted that, this (https://www.facebook.com/sarah.jameson.31392/posts/650570435015764?comment_id=650573995015408&notif_t=like) was my response.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on May 09, 2014, 02:52:49 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 09, 2014, 02:47:20 PM
When someone else posted that, this (https://www.facebook.com/sarah.jameson.31392/posts/650570435015764?comment_id=650573995015408&notif_t=like) was my response.

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on May 09, 2014, 03:10:29 PM
Fucking win.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 09, 2014, 06:35:29 PM
A friend of mine, playing Dark Souls 2:

Why do the pigs have so much HP?  They're fucking pigs.  Oh my god.  Oh good lord...the pigs, they have mad cow disease!  Why are they so tough? 

After 30 seconds:

OK, we've killed one.  Maybe we can get one to fall in the pit?  They're trying to body slam me!  Three little pigs have taken me to half health.  I was just almost killed by three pigs.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 10, 2014, 01:23:48 AM
Via text:

Villager: Just watched cosmos. Imagine What post coital stream of consciousness talk with neil degrasse Tyson is like...
Me: It's kinda like with me if I was black and had a degree.
Me: [half hour later] When we go to Ireland, I would like to visit Glasnevin cemetery, so I can pay my respects to Barry (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kevin_Barry), O'Connell (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daniel_O%27Connell), Markievicz (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Constance_Markievicz) and de Valera (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%89amon_de_Valera), and my disrespects to O'Duffy (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eoin_O%27Duffy).
Villager: Yes.
Me: Yes to if I was a black astronomer or Glasnevin?
Villager: Both
Me: Lol
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on June 11, 2014, 02:14:45 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 09, 2014, 06:35:29 PM
A friend of mine, playing Dark Souls 2:

Why do the pigs have so much HP?  They're fucking pigs.  Oh my god.  Oh good lord...the pigs, they have mad cow disease!  Why are they so tough? 

After 30 seconds:

OK, we've killed one.  Maybe we can get one to fall in the pit?  They're trying to body slam me!  Three little pigs have taken me to half health.  I was just almost killed by three pigs.

Quoting a month-old post because TO HELL WITH THOSE PIGS is still relevant after all this time. Horrible goddamn monsters.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 11, 2014, 02:29:08 PM
Friend posted bulletproof blanket article. This is my response.

(http://i.imgur.com/sfPfIaq.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on June 11, 2014, 06:45:34 PM
Quote from: The Suu on June 11, 2014, 02:29:08 PM
Friend posted bulletproof blanket article. This is my response.

(http://i.imgur.com/sfPfIaq.png)
:lol:
You madam, are a God among men.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 11, 2014, 08:48:50 PM
This one woman took it seriously and tried to tell me that it's not fair to have 3 year olds trained to shoot. I was like "Three years? I mean THREE MONTHS IN THE BELLEH."

Nobody got the joke. :( Now I know what it feels like when nobody goes to Roger's PD Parties. :(
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 12, 2014, 05:03:49 AM
Quote from: Some guy trolling Yahoo News under the name KevinIf you think that wars, violence, natural disasters, terrorism, diseases, etc, are a sign of God's wrath, then God must approve of gay marriage and condemn homophobia, since those sorts of things used to happen to everyone, everywhere, all the time, but now you're relatively safe from those calamities if you live in a society that gives equal rights to homosexuals. I mean, I prefer to think it's because developed nations that favor the rights of their citizens are relatively safe societies to live in, but if you want to see God as a militant gay rights activist with superpowers throwing tornadoes at homophobes, that's up to you.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 12, 2014, 06:30:12 PM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 12, 2014, 05:03:49 AM
Quote from: Some guy trolling Yahoo News under the name KevinIf you think that wars, violence, natural disasters, terrorism, diseases, etc, are a sign of God's wrath, then God must approve of gay marriage and condemn homophobia, since those sorts of things used to happen to everyone, everywhere, all the time, but now you're relatively safe from those calamities if you live in a society that gives equal rights to homosexuals. I mean, I prefer to think it's because developed nations that favor the rights of their citizens are relatively safe societies to live in, but if you want to see God as a militant gay rights activist with superpowers throwing tornadoes at homophobes, that's up to you.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: UB on June 12, 2014, 10:14:25 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on June 13, 2011, 12:29:54 AM
Yeah, I always hated on the Beatles by blaming them for Britney Spears.

Im one of those horrid people that confuses the Beatles with the Monkeys.

*ducking*
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on June 12, 2014, 10:18:11 PM
Quote from: Cainad (dec.) on June 11, 2014, 02:14:45 PM
Quote from: Cain on May 09, 2014, 06:35:29 PM
A friend of mine, playing Dark Souls 2:

Why do the pigs have so much HP?  They're fucking pigs.  Oh my god.  Oh good lord...the pigs, they have mad cow disease!  Why are they so tough? 

After 30 seconds:

OK, we've killed one.  Maybe we can get one to fall in the pit?  They're trying to body slam me!  Three little pigs have taken me to half health.  I was just almost killed by three pigs.

Quoting a month-old post because TO HELL WITH THOSE PIGS is still relevant after all this time. Horrible goddamn monsters.

And I've still not played it myself  :sad:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on June 13, 2014, 09:06:17 PM
(http://imgur.com/1lK0Du0.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 14, 2014, 02:46:19 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 13, 2014, 09:06:17 PM
(http://imgur.com/1lK0Du0.png)

:lulz:

Earth: Hey, aliens!
Aliens: Hey, Earth, what's up? What do you do for fun? How advanced are your physics? What's your biology like? How is your society structured?
Earth: Hey, aliens! We're humans! Are you out there?
Aliens: Yes. Hey, Earth, how are you?
Earth: Hey, aliens! Are you out there? Anyone home?
Aliens: Yes. Hi.
Earth: Yoooohooooo, any aliens out there?
Aliens: Yeah, douchebag, over here. Right. Fucking. Here.
Earth: Hey, aliens, hit us up, we want to meet you!
Aliens: Planet of fucking porn site bots.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 14, 2014, 02:54:06 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 14, 2014, 02:46:19 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 13, 2014, 09:06:17 PM
(http://imgur.com/1lK0Du0.png)

:lulz:

Earth: Hey, aliens!
Aliens: Hey, Earth, what's up? What do you do for fun? How advanced are your physics? What's your biology like? How is your society structured?
Earth: Hey, aliens! We're humans! Are you out there?
Aliens: Yes. Hey, Earth, how are you?
Earth: Hey, aliens! Are you out there? Anyone home?
Aliens: Yes. Hi.
Earth: Yoooohooooo, any aliens out there?
Aliens: Yeah, douchebag, over here. Right. Fucking. Here.
Earth: Hey, aliens, hit us up, we want to meet you!
Aliens: Planet of fucking porn site bots.

:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 14, 2014, 02:57:00 AM
Quote from: The Suu on June 14, 2014, 02:54:06 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 14, 2014, 02:46:19 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 13, 2014, 09:06:17 PM
(http://imgur.com/1lK0Du0.png)

:lulz:

Earth: Hey, aliens!
Aliens: Hey, Earth, what's up? What do you do for fun? How advanced are your physics? What's your biology like? How is your society structured?
Earth: Hey, aliens! We're humans! Are you out there?
Aliens: Yes. Hey, Earth, how are you?
Earth: Hey, aliens! Are you out there? Anyone home?
Aliens: Yes. Hi.
Earth: Yoooohooooo, any aliens out there?
Aliens: Yeah, douchebag, over here. Right. Fucking. Here.
Earth: Hey, aliens, hit us up, we want to meet you!
Aliens: Planet of fucking porn site bots.

:mittens:

:thanks:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 15, 2014, 03:33:48 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 14, 2014, 02:46:19 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 13, 2014, 09:06:17 PM
(http://imgur.com/1lK0Du0.png)

:lulz:

Earth: Hey, aliens!
Aliens: Hey, Earth, what's up? What do you do for fun? How advanced are your physics? What's your biology like? How is your society structured?
Earth: Hey, aliens! We're humans! Are you out there?
Aliens: Yes. Hey, Earth, how are you?
Earth: Hey, aliens! Are you out there? Anyone home?
Aliens: Yes. Hi.
Earth: Yoooohooooo, any aliens out there?
Aliens: Yeah, douchebag, over here. Right. Fucking. Here.
Earth: Hey, aliens, hit us up, we want to meet you!
Aliens: Planet of fucking porn site bots.

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Pæs on June 17, 2014, 01:52:49 AM
19 sentient life forms active in your area. Click here to chat! Don't tell your wife!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 17, 2014, 02:12:07 AM
Quote from: Pæs on June 17, 2014, 01:52:49 AM
19 sentient life forms active in your area. Click here to chat! Don't tell your wife!

:lulz:

First contact available. Very discrete.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on June 17, 2014, 02:23:27 AM
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 17, 2014, 03:21:45 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 14, 2014, 02:46:19 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 13, 2014, 09:06:17 PM
(http://imgur.com/1lK0Du0.png)

:lulz:

Earth: Hey, aliens!
Aliens: Hey, Earth, what's up? What do you do for fun? How advanced are your physics? What's your biology like? How is your society structured?
Earth: Hey, aliens! We're humans! Are you out there?
Aliens: Yes. Hey, Earth, how are you?
Earth: Hey, aliens! Are you out there? Anyone home?
Aliens: Yes. Hi.
Earth: Yoooohooooo, any aliens out there?
Aliens: Yeah, douchebag, over here. Right. Fucking. Here.
Earth: Hey, aliens, hit us up, we want to meet you!
Aliens: Planet of fucking porn site bots.

This made my night.  Which is saying something, on account of I'm sick as a dog.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 17, 2014, 03:22:57 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 17, 2014, 03:21:45 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 14, 2014, 02:46:19 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 13, 2014, 09:06:17 PM
(http://imgur.com/1lK0Du0.png)

:lulz:

Earth: Hey, aliens!
Aliens: Hey, Earth, what's up? What do you do for fun? How advanced are your physics? What's your biology like? How is your society structured?
Earth: Hey, aliens! We're humans! Are you out there?
Aliens: Yes. Hey, Earth, how are you?
Earth: Hey, aliens! Are you out there? Anyone home?
Aliens: Yes. Hi.
Earth: Yoooohooooo, any aliens out there?
Aliens: Yeah, douchebag, over here. Right. Fucking. Here.
Earth: Hey, aliens, hit us up, we want to meet you!
Aliens: Planet of fucking porn site bots.

This made my night.  Which is saying something, on account of I'm sick as a dog.

That makes me gladder for saying it. Feel better!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 17, 2014, 05:18:43 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 17, 2014, 03:21:45 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 14, 2014, 02:46:19 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 13, 2014, 09:06:17 PM
(http://imgur.com/1lK0Du0.png)

:lulz:

Earth: Hey, aliens!
Aliens: Hey, Earth, what's up? What do you do for fun? How advanced are your physics? What's your biology like? How is your society structured?
Earth: Hey, aliens! We're humans! Are you out there?
Aliens: Yes. Hey, Earth, how are you?
Earth: Hey, aliens! Are you out there? Anyone home?
Aliens: Yes. Hi.
Earth: Yoooohooooo, any aliens out there?
Aliens: Yeah, douchebag, over here. Right. Fucking. Here.
Earth: Hey, aliens, hit us up, we want to meet you!
Aliens: Planet of fucking porn site bots.

This made my night.  Which is saying something, on account of I'm sick as a dog.

First they make you go to work on Father's Day, and now you're sick? Again?

SUE.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Luna on June 20, 2014, 12:25:19 AM
"I feel the need to do SCIENCE!  Here, sit here."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: UB on June 20, 2014, 11:21:38 AM
Quote from: Luna on June 20, 2014, 12:25:19 AM
"I feel the need to do SCIENCE!  Here, sit here."

*giggling*

"Hold still, damn it...."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 21, 2014, 01:52:07 AM
Classmate: Keven, could you send me southern bolt prelab #2 I didn't find the answer please?
Me: Yeah gimme a couple of min. COuld you also send me your lab report on micro and pcr?
C: Sure
M: Short answer to two is that there are other, non-radioactive methods to probe, and we are students. The method works just as well and inexperienced students need not expose themselves to radioactivity.
M: Just consider how attractive Asian girl spilled hydrocholoric acid on Wednesday while wearing inappropriate summer dress. We will fuck up.
C: Lol.
M: Her attractiveness is irrelevant, it was just something I noticed. The summer dress is relevant. It is not lab appropriate.
C: Is that #2 answer?
C: Just sent pcr.
M: You need not mention the summer dress, but that's the spirit behind it. We can do it just as well with minimal health risk. Radioactivity is nothing to play with.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 21, 2014, 02:03:14 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 21, 2014, 01:52:07 AM
Classmate: Keven, could you send me southern bolt prelab #2 I didn't find the answer please?
Me: Yeah gimme a couple of min. COuld you also send me your lab report on micro and pcr?
C: Sure
M: Short answer to two is that there are other, non-radioactive methods to probe, and we are students. The method works just as well and inexperienced students need not expose themselves to radioactivity.
M: Just consider how attractive Asian girl spilled hydrocholoric acid on Wednesday while wearing inappropriate summer dress. We will fuck up.
C: Lol.
M: Her attractiveness is irrelevant, it was just something I noticed. The summer dress is relevant. It is not lab appropriate.
C: Is that #2 answer?
C: Just sent pcr.
M: You need not mention the summer dress, but that's the spirit behind it. We can do it just as well with minimal health risk. Radioactivity is nothing to play with.

lol

c: What did you get on exam?
m: Ugh... let's just say I need to hit the books hard.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 25, 2014, 08:09:19 PM
Husband: You got me in trouble at work.

Me: FUCK, what did I do?!

Husband: Well, not really, it's just that all the wives hate you now. However, all the guys like you, so therefore, all the wives hate me.

Me: Wait, what?

Husband: Well I guess after the dinner last week when you told off Chief after he made that douchey comment about your tattoos, and then proceeded to spend the entire time talking with Master Chief about soccer and practically commentating that World Cup game, the guys think you belong on some sort of pedestal, and are now telling their wives that you're basically cooler than they are. Smith even came up to me today and went, "Dude, I wish my wife had Star Wars tattoos and knew beer like yours does. All mine ever does is talk about this pair of shoes she's obsessed with and begs for babies."

Me: Um, sorry not sorry? They picked apples and you got a pear, they shouldn't even say a fucking thing.

Husband: Just saying, you're supposed to be networking with these ladies so when I'm deployed you can help each other out, and I'm apparently blowing it by having a hotter wife than the other guys. So be careful when you actually meet some of the others. Especially at a softball game.

Me: I LOVE BEING THE SUPER VILLAIN! YES. QUICK! I NEED A MUSTACHE I CAN TWIRL! What are we? Fucking 12?

Husband: Welcome to the Navy.

Me:*loud* I AM INVINCIBLE!

*in the background of the phone* "Is that your wife that just said that? I LOVE YOUR WIFE! HI SUU!"


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on June 26, 2014, 12:48:15 AM
Quote from: The Suu on June 25, 2014, 08:09:19 PM
Husband: You got me in trouble at work.

Me: FUCK, what did I do?!

Husband: Well, not really, it's just that all the wives hate you now. However, all the guys like you, so therefore, all the wives hate me.

Me: Wait, what?

Husband: Well I guess after the dinner last week when you told off Chief after he made that douchey comment about your tattoos, and then proceeded to spend the entire time talking with Master Chief about soccer and practically commentating that World Cup game, the guys think you belong on some sort of pedestal, and are now telling their wives that you're basically cooler than they are. Smith even came up to me today and went, "Dude, I wish my wife had Star Wars tattoos and knew beer like yours does. All mine ever does is talk about this pair of shoes she's obsessed with and begs for babies."

Me: Um, sorry not sorry? They picked apples and you got a pear, they shouldn't even say a fucking thing.

Husband: Just saying, you're supposed to be networking with these ladies so when I'm deployed you can help each other out, and I'm apparently blowing it by having a hotter wife than the other guys. So be careful when you actually meet some of the others. Especially at a softball game.

Me: I LOVE BEING THE SUPER VILLAIN! YES. QUICK! I NEED A MUSTACHE I CAN TWIRL! What are we? Fucking 12?

Husband: Welcome to the Navy.

Me:*loud* I AM INVINCIBLE!

*in the background of the phone* "Is that your wife that just said that? I LOVE YOUR WIFE! HI SUU!"




:lulz:

You accidentally'd the whole wives.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 26, 2014, 01:45:30 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 26, 2014, 12:48:15 AM
Quote from: The Suu on June 25, 2014, 08:09:19 PM
Husband: You got me in trouble at work.

Me: FUCK, what did I do?!

Husband: Well, not really, it's just that all the wives hate you now. However, all the guys like you, so therefore, all the wives hate me.

Me: Wait, what?

Husband: Well I guess after the dinner last week when you told off Chief after he made that douchey comment about your tattoos, and then proceeded to spend the entire time talking with Master Chief about soccer and practically commentating that World Cup game, the guys think you belong on some sort of pedestal, and are now telling their wives that you're basically cooler than they are. Smith even came up to me today and went, "Dude, I wish my wife had Star Wars tattoos and knew beer like yours does. All mine ever does is talk about this pair of shoes she's obsessed with and begs for babies."

Me: Um, sorry not sorry? They picked apples and you got a pear, they shouldn't even say a fucking thing.

Husband: Just saying, you're supposed to be networking with these ladies so when I'm deployed you can help each other out, and I'm apparently blowing it by having a hotter wife than the other guys. So be careful when you actually meet some of the others. Especially at a softball game.

Me: I LOVE BEING THE SUPER VILLAIN! YES. QUICK! I NEED A MUSTACHE I CAN TWIRL! What are we? Fucking 12?

Husband: Welcome to the Navy.

Me:*loud* I AM INVINCIBLE!

*in the background of the phone* "Is that your wife that just said that? I LOVE YOUR WIFE! HI SUU!"




:lulz:

You accidentally'd the whole wives.

Navy Wives are a special breed of wife. Since I started dating him, I've gotten warnings. I've gotten warnings from other wives. The wife across the hall, who I refer to as Katniss Everdeen, has the same effect on them as I do, because she shoots things with a bow and arrow for food. You have the ones like me and Katniss, the kind that keep to ourselves and show up in a dress for functions only when we REALLY HAVE TO, and then you have the Stepford Navy Wives that spend all their husbands' money, pop out babies to get more Navy money, don't work, talk about shoes and purses and then turn around and become WestPac Widows the minute they're husband is out to sea and turn into raging balls of hate the minute another wife shows up that is apparently cool to the guys, because we're somehow competition. I never understood that level of shallowness. We're all married, we're all adults, just because I can talk about comic books to your husband doesn't mean I'm trying to GET IN HIS CRACKER JACKS.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on June 26, 2014, 11:58:11 AM
You two need to form a band (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZlW6FBEuKiE).
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Raz Tech on June 26, 2014, 12:36:38 PM
Quote from: The Suu on June 26, 2014, 01:45:30 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 26, 2014, 12:48:15 AM
Quote from: The Suu on June 25, 2014, 08:09:19 PM
Husband: You got me in trouble at work.

Me: FUCK, what did I do?!

Husband: Well, not really, it's just that all the wives hate you now. However, all the guys like you, so therefore, all the wives hate me.

Me: Wait, what?

Husband: Well I guess after the dinner last week when you told off Chief after he made that douchey comment about your tattoos, and then proceeded to spend the entire time talking with Master Chief about soccer and practically commentating that World Cup game, the guys think you belong on some sort of pedestal, and are now telling their wives that you're basically cooler than they are. Smith even came up to me today and went, "Dude, I wish my wife had Star Wars tattoos and knew beer like yours does. All mine ever does is talk about this pair of shoes she's obsessed with and begs for babies."

Me: Um, sorry not sorry? They picked apples and you got a pear, they shouldn't even say a fucking thing.

Husband: Just saying, you're supposed to be networking with these ladies so when I'm deployed you can help each other out, and I'm apparently blowing it by having a hotter wife than the other guys. So be careful when you actually meet some of the others. Especially at a softball game.

Me: I LOVE BEING THE SUPER VILLAIN! YES. QUICK! I NEED A MUSTACHE I CAN TWIRL! What are we? Fucking 12?

Husband: Welcome to the Navy.

Me:*loud* I AM INVINCIBLE!

*in the background of the phone* "Is that your wife that just said that? I LOVE YOUR WIFE! HI SUU!"




:lulz:

You accidentally'd the whole wives.

Navy Wives are a special breed of wife. Since I started dating him, I've gotten warnings. I've gotten warnings from other wives. The wife across the hall, who I refer to as Katniss Everdeen, has the same effect on them as I do, because she shoots things with a bow and arrow for food. You have the ones like me and Katniss, the kind that keep to ourselves and show up in a dress for functions only when we REALLY HAVE TO, and then you have the Stepford Navy Wives that spend all their husbands' money, pop out babies to get more Navy money, don't work, talk about shoes and purses and then turn around and become WestPac Widows the minute they're husband is out to sea and turn into raging balls of hate the minute another wife shows up that is apparently cool to the guys, because we're somehow competition. I never understood that level of shallowness. We're all married, we're all adults, just because I can talk about comic books to your husband doesn't mean I'm trying to GET IN HIS CRACKER JACKS.

My favorite Navy wives are the ones who think they're privileged because their husbands are in the military.
Relevant story:

Walking out of the commisary, carrying my son (~1 at the time) and a few bags of groceries, I'm about to pass a lady who is trying to juggle some grocery bags and open her trunk at the same time and it's not working out.  One of the bags falls or rips or something and some food goes all over the place.  Normally I'd help her out, but my son was all restless and I was juggling my own groceries.  She looks over at me and says
"Hey, aren't you going to come help me with this?"
As sincere as I can, since I feel a bit bad about it, I say "I'm sorry miss, I don't have enough hands for it."
This makes her freak out, stand up and say "Hey, my husband is an Ensign and if he were here he would order you to come over here and help me clean this up so you better come over here and help me now."
At this point I'm starting to put my groceries into my car, and under normal circumstances, I would have gone to help her.  These weren't normal circumstances though, this lady was being a bitch.  By the time I finish getting my son all clipped in and stuff, she's done picking everything up and has returned to confront me again.
"My husband is going to be so mad when he hears about this, he's going to get you in so much trouble.  He's an officer and he wouldn't like this."
"Look lady, I don't even listen to most ensigns on account of them being retarded, so go ahead and tell your husband whatever you want, I'm leaving."
She demanded my name and rank and all that stuff, and took down my license plate number.  I even told her the truth, just because I was positive nothing bad would happen.  Then I finally got in my car and drove away.  Shockingly, nothing ever came of it.
The worst part is that there are so many more stories like this.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 26, 2014, 02:26:52 PM
Quote from: The Suu on June 26, 2014, 01:45:30 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 26, 2014, 12:48:15 AM
Quote from: The Suu on June 25, 2014, 08:09:19 PM
Husband: You got me in trouble at work.

Me: FUCK, what did I do?!

Husband: Well, not really, it's just that all the wives hate you now. However, all the guys like you, so therefore, all the wives hate me.

Me: Wait, what?

Husband: Well I guess after the dinner last week when you told off Chief after he made that douchey comment about your tattoos, and then proceeded to spend the entire time talking with Master Chief about soccer and practically commentating that World Cup game, the guys think you belong on some sort of pedestal, and are now telling their wives that you're basically cooler than they are. Smith even came up to me today and went, "Dude, I wish my wife had Star Wars tattoos and knew beer like yours does. All mine ever does is talk about this pair of shoes she's obsessed with and begs for babies."

Me: Um, sorry not sorry? They picked apples and you got a pear, they shouldn't even say a fucking thing.

Husband: Just saying, you're supposed to be networking with these ladies so when I'm deployed you can help each other out, and I'm apparently blowing it by having a hotter wife than the other guys. So be careful when you actually meet some of the others. Especially at a softball game.

Me: I LOVE BEING THE SUPER VILLAIN! YES. QUICK! I NEED A MUSTACHE I CAN TWIRL! What are we? Fucking 12?

Husband: Welcome to the Navy.

Me:*loud* I AM INVINCIBLE!

*in the background of the phone* "Is that your wife that just said that? I LOVE YOUR WIFE! HI SUU!"




:lulz:

You accidentally'd the whole wives.

Navy Wives are a special breed of wife. Since I started dating him, I've gotten warnings. I've gotten warnings from other wives. The wife across the hall, who I refer to as Katniss Everdeen, has the same effect on them as I do, because she shoots things with a bow and arrow for food. You have the ones like me and Katniss, the kind that keep to ourselves and show up in a dress for functions only when we REALLY HAVE TO, and then you have the Stepford Navy Wives that spend all their husbands' money, pop out babies to get more Navy money, don't work, talk about shoes and purses and then turn around and become WestPac Widows the minute they're husband is out to sea and turn into raging balls of hate the minute another wife shows up that is apparently cool to the guys, because we're somehow competition. I never understood that level of shallowness. We're all married, we're all adults, just because I can talk about comic books to your husband doesn't mean I'm trying to GET IN HIS CRACKER JACKS.

No comment.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on June 26, 2014, 02:39:50 PM
Quote from: Raz Tech on June 26, 2014, 12:36:38 PM
Quote from: The Suu on June 26, 2014, 01:45:30 AM
Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on June 26, 2014, 12:48:15 AM
Quote from: The Suu on June 25, 2014, 08:09:19 PM
Husband: You got me in trouble at work.

Me: FUCK, what did I do?!

Husband: Well, not really, it's just that all the wives hate you now. However, all the guys like you, so therefore, all the wives hate me.

Me: Wait, what?

Husband: Well I guess after the dinner last week when you told off Chief after he made that douchey comment about your tattoos, and then proceeded to spend the entire time talking with Master Chief about soccer and practically commentating that World Cup game, the guys think you belong on some sort of pedestal, and are now telling their wives that you're basically cooler than they are. Smith even came up to me today and went, "Dude, I wish my wife had Star Wars tattoos and knew beer like yours does. All mine ever does is talk about this pair of shoes she's obsessed with and begs for babies."

Me: Um, sorry not sorry? They picked apples and you got a pear, they shouldn't even say a fucking thing.

Husband: Just saying, you're supposed to be networking with these ladies so when I'm deployed you can help each other out, and I'm apparently blowing it by having a hotter wife than the other guys. So be careful when you actually meet some of the others. Especially at a softball game.

Me: I LOVE BEING THE SUPER VILLAIN! YES. QUICK! I NEED A MUSTACHE I CAN TWIRL! What are we? Fucking 12?

Husband: Welcome to the Navy.

Me:*loud* I AM INVINCIBLE!

*in the background of the phone* "Is that your wife that just said that? I LOVE YOUR WIFE! HI SUU!"




:lulz:

You accidentally'd the whole wives.

Navy Wives are a special breed of wife. Since I started dating him, I've gotten warnings. I've gotten warnings from other wives. The wife across the hall, who I refer to as Katniss Everdeen, has the same effect on them as I do, because she shoots things with a bow and arrow for food. You have the ones like me and Katniss, the kind that keep to ourselves and show up in a dress for functions only when we REALLY HAVE TO, and then you have the Stepford Navy Wives that spend all their husbands' money, pop out babies to get more Navy money, don't work, talk about shoes and purses and then turn around and become WestPac Widows the minute they're husband is out to sea and turn into raging balls of hate the minute another wife shows up that is apparently cool to the guys, because we're somehow competition. I never understood that level of shallowness. We're all married, we're all adults, just because I can talk about comic books to your husband doesn't mean I'm trying to GET IN HIS CRACKER JACKS.

My favorite Navy wives are the ones who think they're privileged because their husbands are in the military.
Relevant story:

Walking out of the commisary, carrying my son (~1 at the time) and a few bags of groceries, I'm about to pass a lady who is trying to juggle some grocery bags and open her trunk at the same time and it's not working out.  One of the bags falls or rips or something and some food goes all over the place.  Normally I'd help her out, but my son was all restless and I was juggling my own groceries.  She looks over at me and says
"Hey, aren't you going to come help me with this?"
As sincere as I can, since I feel a bit bad about it, I say "I'm sorry miss, I don't have enough hands for it."
This makes her freak out, stand up and say "Hey, my husband is an Ensign and if he were here he would order you to come over here and help me clean this up so you better come over here and help me now."
At this point I'm starting to put my groceries into my car, and under normal circumstances, I would have gone to help her.  These weren't normal circumstances though, this lady was being a bitch.  By the time I finish getting my son all clipped in and stuff, she's done picking everything up and has returned to confront me again.
"My husband is going to be so mad when he hears about this, he's going to get you in so much trouble.  He's an officer and he wouldn't like this."
"Look lady, I don't even listen to most ensigns on account of them being retarded, so go ahead and tell your husband whatever you want, I'm leaving."
She demanded my name and rank and all that stuff, and took down my license plate number.  I even told her the truth, just because I was positive nothing bad would happen.  Then I finally got in my car and drove away.  Shockingly, nothing ever came of it.
The worst part is that there are so many more stories like this.

(http://memecreator.eu/media/created/wuu18r.jpg)

:horrormirth:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on July 18, 2014, 05:37:37 AM
Me to Daniel: "I'm glad that we're both not John Tesh"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on July 22, 2014, 06:06:32 AM
Quote from: http://lesswrong.com/lw/kd2/on_terminal_goals_and_virtue_ethics/#commentsWhy are you still making excuses not to be awesome?
You'll have to ctrl-f that, I am too tired to figure out how to link more precisely, or find out if that is even possible.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 22, 2014, 07:54:37 AM
Me, yesterday, on FB:

"You think the internet is your ally? You merely adopted the internet. I was born in it, molded by it. I didn't see the IRLs until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but blinding! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F157geaXp_w)"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on August 07, 2014, 04:57:39 PM
I almost called in "ridiculous" today.  "Hello--Yeah I can't come in today.  Everything is just ridiculous."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 07, 2014, 05:00:37 PM
Quote from: Bu☆ns on August 07, 2014, 04:57:39 PM
I almost called in "ridiculous" today.  "Hello--Yeah I can't come in today.  Everything is just ridiculous."

I should try that sometime.


Quote from: Cain on July 22, 2014, 07:54:37 AM
Me, yesterday, on FB:

"You think the internet is your ally? You merely adopted the internet. I was born in it, molded by it. I didn't see the IRLs until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but blinding! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F157geaXp_w)"

:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on August 08, 2014, 11:27:19 PM
Mrs LMNO:

"My vagina is not a Dependent-Cannon."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on August 09, 2014, 02:34:49 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on August 08, 2014, 11:27:19 PM
Mrs LMNO:

"My vagina is not a Dependent-Cannon."

:lol:

Your wife is awesome.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on August 27, 2014, 05:14:35 PM
The Boy:
If mean kids try to take my lunchbox I will kick them in the penis and punch them in the face.


*sniff*
I am just so proud of him.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on August 27, 2014, 05:19:28 PM
Quote from: Alty on August 27, 2014, 05:14:35 PM
The Boy:
If mean kids try to take my lunchbox I will kick them in the penis and punch them in the face.


*sniff*
I am just so proud of him.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 27, 2014, 05:30:48 PM
Housemate to boyfriend: "Me and you, fisticuffs, all day long"

Boyfriend to housemate: "I'll fuckin scrap any time you like goddamn it. I'll bring my blankie. It makes me a superhero."

I think they are in the throes of bromance.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on August 28, 2014, 04:50:16 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on August 27, 2014, 05:30:48 PM
Housemate to boyfriend: "Me and you, fisticuffs, all day long"

Boyfriend to housemate: "I'll fuckin scrap any time you like goddamn it. I'll bring my blankie. It makes me a superhero."

I think they are in the throes of bromance.
That is just the cutest testosterone outburst i have seen in ages!
I love the use of emotional dissonance as a bonding ritual.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 29, 2014, 06:44:41 PM
Quote from: Regret on August 28, 2014, 04:50:16 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on August 27, 2014, 05:30:48 PM
Housemate to boyfriend: "Me and you, fisticuffs, all day long"

Boyfriend to housemate: "I'll fuckin scrap any time you like goddamn it. I'll bring my blankie. It makes me a superhero."

I think they are in the throes of bromance.
That is just the cutest testosterone outburst i have seen in ages!
I love the use of emotional dissonance as a bonding ritual.

They're pretty precious.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Bu🤠ns on September 29, 2014, 09:14:55 PM
Today I learned my cousin's daughter, Addalie, is a zen master:

(https://i.imgur.com/AM5xjzZ.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 30, 2014, 10:55:47 PM
Green is me.

(http://i.imgur.com/sGdLe1t.png)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 01, 2014, 03:52:50 AM
Quote from: The Suu on September 30, 2014, 10:55:47 PM
Green is me.

(http://i.imgur.com/sGdLe1t.png)

Only a matter of time, and then it will be an off-Broadway musical.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 02, 2015, 02:09:36 AM
Actual quote from today's guest lecturer:

QuoteThe great thing about Antarctica is that there are no people there, only scientists.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on April 02, 2015, 02:11:01 AM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 02, 2015, 02:09:36 AM
Actual quote from today's guest lecturer:

QuoteThe great thing about Antarctica is that there are no people there, only scientists.

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on April 02, 2015, 03:59:16 AM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 02, 2015, 02:09:36 AM
Actual quote from today's guest lecturer:

QuoteThe great thing about Antarctica is that there are no people there, only scientists.

I miss Nigel when she was a people.   :cry:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 02, 2015, 06:49:13 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 02, 2015, 03:59:16 AM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 02, 2015, 02:09:36 AM
Actual quote from today's guest lecturer:

QuoteThe great thing about Antarctica is that there are no people there, only scientists.

I miss Nigel when she was a people.   :cry:

I miss being people too.  :cry:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on April 02, 2015, 07:29:00 AM
It just makes me want to move to Antarctica.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 02, 2015, 08:01:10 AM
Quote from: Reginald Ret on April 02, 2015, 07:29:00 AM
It just makes me want to move to Antarctica.

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT THERE ARE NO PEOPLE THERE.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on April 02, 2015, 10:05:57 AM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 02, 2015, 08:01:10 AM
Quote from: Reginald Ret on April 02, 2015, 07:29:00 AM
It just makes me want to move to Antarctica.

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT THERE ARE NO PEOPLE THERE.
I don't like people.
Always breathing all over the place.
THAT'S MY AIR YOU FUCKERS!
GEDDOFF MY CONTINENT!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: xXRon_Paul_42016Xxx(weed) on April 05, 2015, 09:57:44 PM
[Overweight pizza hut employee with huge ear gauges and a fauxhawk]: "Check out my Vape, its mechanical."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 05, 2015, 11:17:55 PM
Quote from: xXRon_Paul_42016Xxx(weed) on April 05, 2015, 09:57:44 PM
[Overweight pizza hut employee with huge ear gauges and a fauxhawk]: "Check out my Vape, its mechanical."

:horrormirth:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Junkenstein on April 07, 2015, 11:16:20 PM
Quote from: xXRon_Paul_42016Xxx(weed) on April 05, 2015, 09:57:44 PM
[Overweight pizza hut employee with huge ear gauges and a fauxhawk]: "Check out my Vape, its mechanical."

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 04, 2015, 11:20:23 PM
Cain:the right has freaked out because obviously Obama is sending in the troops to impose martial law/confiscate guns/allow Mexicans across the border/impose the NWO

Lizzie:All of those states are not clustered together but very much all embody the idea of "out west" in one way or another

Lizzie:I love the Mexicans

Cain:they're totally not training in terrain that is similar to certain parts of the Middle East in simulation for future operations against ISIS

Lizzie:Fuck fences

Cain:it's all a SINISTER PLOT TO CONQUER TEXASTAN

Lizzie: And rich old ladies who have gardeners anyways

Cain: maybe if you ask nicely a Navy SEAL will blow up a fence for you

Lizzie: That sounds cool and like something that would be somewhat fun

Lizzie: I just wouldn't want to go over seas. Extreme camping

Lizzie: I bet I could get him to blow up more than a fence

Cain: true.  SEALs will pretty much blow up anything for any reason

Lizzie: Lol right

Lizzie: That's all they do

Lizzie: Aside from swabbing decks with lots of men, sailing ships with lots of men, submarines with lots of men, etc

Cain: lots of sea men, out at sea

Cain: don't ask what they get up to, as they wont tell

Lizzie: Hold still my dreams, under the sea

Lizzie: LOL
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 05, 2015, 12:44:54 AM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 06, 2015, 07:53:27 PM
QuoteAs long as it's all nice and scientific, I want the DNA I drink to be from Superman and Aquaman.
--Aunt Rita, on Facebook
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on June 15, 2015, 11:45:06 PM
On Facebook:

"The Hero of Jurassic World Is Not Chris Pratt, But The Man Double-Fisting Margaritas [Buzzfeed link]"

Me: Who's Margarita? I'm surprised they even allowed that sort of thing to be shown in the cinema...
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 15, 2015, 11:51:15 PM
Quote from: Cain on June 15, 2015, 11:45:06 PM
On Facebook:

"The Hero of Jurassic World Is Not Chris Pratt, But The Man Double-Fisting Margaritas [Buzzfeed link]"

Me: Who's Margarita? I'm surprised they even allowed that sort of thing to be shown in the cinema...
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on June 15, 2015, 11:52:18 PM
You can tell no-one at Buzzfeed actually went to journalism school, or even did an English course.  You don't capitalize everything.

As an aside, it's stuff like that which will eventually get me kicked off Facebook, I'm sure.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 16, 2015, 02:00:03 AM
Quote from: Cain on June 15, 2015, 11:52:18 PM
You can tell no-one at Buzzfeed actually went to journalism school, or even did an English course.  You don't capitalize everything.

As an aside, it's stuff like that which will eventually get me kicked off Facebook, I'm sure.

Most of the people writing for "news" sources can't write for shit. It's what you get when you stop paying people.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on June 16, 2015, 02:27:08 AM
They also probably phased out sub-editors entirely...my sister works as one, and her company recently downsized their entire sub-editorial department.  Fact-checking, spelling and grammar checks and writing titles can all be farmed out to the great unwashed masses in return for "exposure", or something.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 02, 2015, 05:19:32 AM
A more-or-less typical Wednesday evening conversation:

"I am getting tired of the word craft. Craft cocktails, craft scotch eggs, craft craft. Craft pussy on the wood fired Avenue of Roses," Charley said.

"That's so beautiful. I am wearing a craft sweatshop dress made by a hand-crafted Chinese adolescent," I replied.

"Smoking craft-made water hash with a craft-made craftless glass pipe," he said.

"I think the next big trend is uniformity. The mass-produced anonymous look."

"J Crew?"

"Totally. Gap. Assembly-line, factory-produced couture..."

"Maybe no. So many folk must wear socks."

I continued, "...reassuring. Stable. A functional cog in a social machine that is larger than all of us. A look that says 'I believe in the Collective.'"

"'And all the humans are dead,'" Charley blurted.

"So moving. Graceful. Scintillating," I broke out my rusty poetry review skills.

"I touched one. They're dead," he repeated.

Florid. My imagination was captured. "Warm in the summer sun, bloating. Soon the haciendas come."

"The Goddess Rebecca and her dusty brood of minions," he referred to our cupboard moths.

"In the aftermath the shining robot workers of the Collective will place offerings of grain in the cupboards that once held human food," I finished triumphantly.


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on July 02, 2015, 09:54:14 AM
That was beautiful.   :lol:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Eater of Clowns on July 02, 2015, 11:08:25 AM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 02, 2015, 05:19:32 AM
A more-or-less typical Wednesday evening conversation:

"I am getting tired of the word craft. Craft cocktails, craft scotch eggs, craft craft. Craft pussy on the wood fired Avenue of Roses," Charley said.

"That's so beautiful. I am wearing a craft sweatshop dress made by a hand-crafted Chinese adolescent," I replied.

"Smoking craft-made water hash with a craft-made craftless glass pipe," he said.

"I think the next big trend is uniformity. The mass-produced anonymous look."

"J Crew?"

"Totally. Gap. Assembly-line, factory-produced couture..."

"Maybe no. So many folk must wear socks."

I continued, "...reassuring. Stable. A functional cog in a social machine that is larger than all of us. A look that says 'I believe in the Collective.'"

"'And all the humans are dead,'" Charley blurted.

"So moving. Graceful. Scintillating," I broke out my rusty poetry review skills.

"I touched one. They're dead," he repeated.

Florid. My imagination was captured. "Warm in the summer sun, bloating. Soon the haciendas come."

"The Goddess Rebecca and her dusty brood of minions," he referred to our cupboard moths.

"In the aftermath the shining robot workers of the Collective will place offerings of grain in the cupboards that once held human food," I finished triumphantly.
:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Reginald Ret on July 10, 2015, 10:27:10 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 03, 2009, 01:33:55 AM
Sometimes it's okay to be funny. 

Sometimes it's okay to be nice.  <---if you tell anyone I said that, I'll deny it, and shit in your lungs.

Out of context quotes are the best quotes!

Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on July 31, 2015, 09:03:22 PM
Quote
Lizzie:  I think I may be most excited about Irish lit

Lizzie:  "They're always after me lucky charms!"

Cain:  enjoy 10,000 hours of James Joyce's ramblings

Lizzie:  Not sure who we are covering

Lizzie:  I think it says

Lizzie:  What do they ramble about

Lizzie:  Potatoes? And famine?

Cain:  the fucking British

Cain:  you'll be covering IRA Manifestos 1916-1962 and PIRA Manifestos 1963-1998

Cain:  and James Jpyce

Cain:  and IRA manifestos in the style of James Joyce

Cain:  and potato poetry

Cain:  by James Joyce

Cain:  term paper will be on the symbolic use of potatoes in IRA manifestos to emulate James Joyce

Lizzie:  Potatoooooos and Catholics forever

Cain:  and fuck the British
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on July 31, 2015, 10:11:26 PM
 :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 04, 2015, 05:39:47 AM
Quote from: Cain on July 31, 2015, 09:03:22 PM
Quote
Lizzie:  I think I may be most excited about Irish lit

Lizzie:  "They're always after me lucky charms!"

Cain:  enjoy 10,000 hours of James Joyce's ramblings

Lizzie:  Not sure who we are covering

Lizzie:  I think it says

Lizzie:  What do they ramble about

Lizzie:  Potatoes? And famine?

Cain:  the fucking British

Cain:  you'll be covering IRA Manifestos 1916-1962 and PIRA Manifestos 1963-1998

Cain:  and James Jpyce

Cain:  and IRA manifestos in the style of James Joyce

Cain:  and potato poetry

Cain:  by James Joyce

Cain:  term paper will be on the symbolic use of potatoes in IRA manifestos to emulate James Joyce

Lizzie:  Potatoooooos and Catholics forever

Cain:  and fuck the British

:lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on August 09, 2015, 08:13:19 AM
Today we fumigated the apartment I just moved into, but there are still roaches scuttling around.

Roommate: This is just how it is in Fresno. There're roaches. And this is the best I've had it.

Me: (holding a battery-powered spray bottle of Raid, reading the label) I should order some more diatomaceous earth. My last roommate wouldn't let me use any and threw out my box of it.

Roommate: What is that, diet pills?

M: It's microscopic triangles that slice up roaches. He thought it was dangerous but would spray Raid in the kitchen willy nilly.

R: What? I'll have to research it.

M: It kills insects and arachnids by slicing up their joints and they die of dehydration. You just lightly powder it in their hiding places.

R: I don't want to mess with no chemicals.

M: It's not a chemical. And it's safe for humans to eat. You can buy it in food grade, people feed it to their horses.

R: How is it made then?

M: It's the fossilized bodies of diatoms. So it's made of stone over millions of years.

R: But where do people get it?

M: (I look it up on my phone) I don't know.

R: I don't know. I'll ask J about it. I don't want no chemicals in here.

M: We spray this stuff in the kitchen (I point to the Raid) and it's chemicals that actually can harm people and pets. Diatomaceous earth doesn't kill bugs through chemical means. It slices them up.

R: But what if it gets in the air?

M: The Raid actually does get in the air and it's literally poison that's airborne. The diatomaceous earth isn't good to inhale but it isn't like inhaling poison.

R: I don't know. I don't want to mess with no poison in here.

M: Oh my God. It's not poison. Why are people okay with spraying Raid all over their kitchen but not diatomaceous earth under appliances and shit?

R: How does it kill bugs then?

M: It slices them up. But we're too big for it to hurt us. It gets lodged in their joints when they crawl through it.

R: Hmmm.... So it would be like if I fed you spaghetti with glass in it?

M: Yeah, kind of. Except bugs don't have to eat it.

R: That's how my mother killed my father, she put powdered glass in his spaghetti and it cut up his intestines. (she gestures by wiggling her fingers around her stomach and makes a gagging face)

M: (I note that my roommate made us spaghetti not long after I moved in) Ah! That's horrible!

R: He was a wife beater. He abused her.

M: Whoa, maybe he deserved it then....

R: I don't want none of that stuff up in here. What if it gets in our food?

M: I will eat a bunch of it just to prove it's safe.

R: (she shakes her head and walks off) Hmm-mm, I don't wanna mess with none of that.

M: Okay. Well, I don't think my daughter will be able to visit with all the poison and roaches. (I retreat back to my room to take stock of my life)

R: (she comes to my room after a few minutes) Well, you should be able to have your daughter visit. You can put that stuff down, just show me where you put it when you do.

M: Thanks R. But I can't even afford a car right now so she won't be visiting any time soon.

R: We're going to have a car. Watch, I'm going to win Publisher's Clearing House.

M: (I attempt a smile) That would be nice. (I watch a large roach run underneath my dresser)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on August 09, 2015, 03:53:43 PM
Fuck roaches so hard. At least sense kind of won in the end?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 09, 2015, 04:34:55 PM
Sweet merciful fuck, you're living with a moron.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on August 09, 2015, 09:17:21 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on August 09, 2015, 03:53:43 PM
Fuck roaches so hard. At least sense kind of won in the end?

Yeah, I suppose. I don't know how I feel about using the "think of the children" argument, but it was really my main concern. I hate roaches but if it were only me that I had to worry about it would just be a nasty annoyance that I wouldn't make a big deal about.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on August 09, 2015, 09:24:40 PM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 09, 2015, 04:34:55 PM
Sweet merciful fuck, you're living with a moron.

Maybe. She's lived on the streets for a lot of her life and recently had a stroke, so I cut her a lot of slack.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on August 09, 2015, 11:58:50 PM
We need a picture of your housemate, so we can put "fucking diatomaceous earth, how does it work?" over it and turn her into an overused meme in the pest control community.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on August 10, 2015, 12:35:48 AM
Quote"I say to you, get up and walk!" Immediately the SJW rose on his feet and began checking the privileges of everyone around him. He looked at Jesus and said, "'Get up and walk,' seriously? I mean, I'm glad I can walk again, but really, you're kind of a shitlord." Jesus told the manchild, "Your rage has healed you. Go in peace, or whatever you use instead."

- Nathaniel Sullivan
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 16, 2015, 03:31:21 AM
QuoteI wish I could speak Enochian. The reason why is that when I was in the army, I got a chance to go to Mount Sinai. If I spoke Enochian, I'd have lit the bush on fire again and drunk-dialed God.

- TGRR, talking to magicktards on Youtube.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 16, 2015, 03:37:25 AM
This is the kinda shit I have to deal with, since Nigel is too busy to kill them all:

QuoteSo many. From as far back as i can remember. Every house I've lived in has stories or the weird or unexplained. I'll do the highlights.
First house. We were the first ones to live there. I was there from one week old to 15. I once ran up the stairs like i had done so many times before. I stopped on the Lansing and it was a straight shot to my room. For some reason i was frozen. Like my legs were stuck in concrete. It was almost dark outside and pretty dark in my mom's room. No one was upstairs. Just me. For reasons unknown i had to look into mom's room. In there, i saw something. It was tall, with eyes that looked like a wall of fire moved behind them. Like those colors. The eyes were almond shaped but much larger and wider than a person's. It seemed to smile. A very eerie smile, with the same wall of fire thing going on. I couldn't see a body. I only know it was tall because of how high up the eyes were from the floor. I was terrified. I didn't know what it was. I was finally able to move again and I went to my room. When I came out it was gone and I never saw it again. I also never went back up the stairs without turning on the light. (I didn't have any drugs or alcohol in my system.)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 16, 2015, 03:46:34 AM
OH MY GOD SHE'S STILL GOING.  SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 16, 2015, 03:49:48 AM
OH FOR THE LOVE OF "BOB" SHUT UP
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 16, 2015, 04:09:55 AM
Post number 6:

QuoteMy Mom's apartment: i saw a few strange things here. I think they were Shadow People. Most people think these are 'evil' personally i think people think this because they look different/weird. I saw something that would peek at me from around corners.

i was once playing on the computer, it was dark, the only light was coming from the computer and the TV. My mom was sleeping on an air mattress in the living room. I was at the end of the living room next to the kitchen doorway. I had Earbuds in but i could hear my mom snoring. I saw someone walk or if the kitchen and the Walnut behind me. I could feel the air of someone walking by me. I thought 'when did mom get up? ' but she was still snoring. So i turned and this person was leaning Over my mom. And then they were gone.

Oh my fucking god.  I can't stand it.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Meunster on September 16, 2015, 08:07:55 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 16, 2015, 04:09:55 AM
Post number 6:

QuoteMy Mom's apartment: i saw a few strange things here. I think they were Shadow People. Most people think these are 'evil' personally i think people think this because they look different/weird. I saw something that would peek at me from around corners.

i was once playing on the computer, it was dark, the only light was coming from the computer and the TV. My mom was sleeping on an air mattress in the living room. I was at the end of the living room next to the kitchen doorway. I had Earbuds in but i could hear my mom snoring. I saw someone walk or if the kitchen and the Walnut behind me. I could feel the air of someone walking by me. I thought 'when did mom get up? ' but she was still snoring. So i turned and this person was leaning Over my mom. And then they were gone.

Oh my fucking god.  I can't stand it.

Does anyone else see shadow people and shit from the corner of their eyes?
Not in the autistic, attention seeking way, but in the "oh shit, huh, fucking eyes playing tricks on me" way.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on September 16, 2015, 04:20:27 PM
Quote from: Meunster on September 16, 2015, 08:07:55 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 16, 2015, 04:09:55 AM
Post number 6:

QuoteMy Mom's apartment: i saw a few strange things here. I think they were Shadow People. Most people think these are 'evil' personally i think people think this because they look different/weird. I saw something that would peek at me from around corners.

i was once playing on the computer, it was dark, the only light was coming from the computer and the TV. My mom was sleeping on an air mattress in the living room. I was at the end of the living room next to the kitchen doorway. I had Earbuds in but i could hear my mom snoring. I saw someone walk or if the kitchen and the Walnut behind me. I could feel the air of someone walking by me. I thought 'when did mom get up? ' but she was still snoring. So i turned and this person was leaning Over my mom. And then they were gone.

Oh my fucking god.  I can't stand it.

Does anyone else see shadow people and shit from the corner of their eyes?
Not in the autistic, attention seeking way, but in the "oh shit, huh, fucking eyes playing tricks on me" way.

Only happened to me once in the height of my flaky pagan days (blue foot coming down a staircase near my head). Twice with auditory hallucinations, and I suspect I'll get more of those as my hearing continues to deteriorate (damn you tinnitus!) and my stupid brain tries to fill in the gaps. Wires get crossed sometimes, especially in low light situations like the ones she's describing.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 17, 2015, 05:22:30 PM
Quote from: Meunster on September 16, 2015, 08:07:55 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 16, 2015, 04:09:55 AM
Post number 6:

QuoteMy Mom's apartment: i saw a few strange things here. I think they were Shadow People. Most people think these are 'evil' personally i think people think this because they look different/weird. I saw something that would peek at me from around corners.

i was once playing on the computer, it was dark, the only light was coming from the computer and the TV. My mom was sleeping on an air mattress in the living room. I was at the end of the living room next to the kitchen doorway. I had Earbuds in but i could hear my mom snoring. I saw someone walk or if the kitchen and the Walnut behind me. I could feel the air of someone walking by me. I thought 'when did mom get up? ' but she was still snoring. So i turned and this person was leaning Over my mom. And then they were gone.

Oh my fucking god.  I can't stand it.

Does anyone else see shadow people and shit from the corner of their eyes?
Not in the autistic, attention seeking way, but in the "oh shit, huh, fucking eyes playing tricks on me" way.

Oh yeah

that's pretty normal

especially when you're tired.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 17, 2015, 05:56:32 PM
When you get really tired, it becomes shadow spiders.

You thought you knew terror?  Stay awake for 96 hours.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 19, 2015, 01:21:18 AM
Lizzie: I guess planned parenthood finally got voted to lose funding...

Me: looks like Obama intends to veto it

Me: meanwhile, on PD.com, someone who thinks test tube babies literally develop inside test tubes is trying to teach us about biology

Lizzie: Good I hope he does

Me: I know, right? biology is a key scientific discipline
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 19, 2015, 03:37:41 AM
Quote from: Cain on September 19, 2015, 01:21:18 AM
Lizzie: I guess planned parenthood finally got voted to lose funding...

Me: looks like Obama intends to veto it

Me: meanwhile, on PD.com, someone who thinks test tube babies literally develop inside test tubes is trying to teach us about biology

Lizzie: Good I hope he does

Me: I know, right? biology is a key scientific discipline

:lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on January 09, 2016, 05:20:20 AM
Regarding the video How to Do Double Hip Locks (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7z7TRJWQ0U)

Quote from: Youtube CommenterI look like a pigeon having a seizure, I don't think I can do this
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 29, 2016, 06:52:35 PM
"In my 30-year history in the Drug Enforcement Administration, and related agencies, the major targets of my investigations almost invariably turned out to be working for the CIA."
- Dennis Doyle, former chief of CENTAC and mobile task force operations, DEA
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Junkenstein on March 29, 2016, 07:13:39 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 29, 2016, 06:52:35 PM
"In my 30-year history in the Drug Enforcement Administration, and related agencies, the major targets of my investigations almost invariably turned out to be working for the CIA."
- Dennis Doyle, former chief of CENTAC and mobile task force operations, DEA

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: minuspace on March 29, 2016, 09:45:28 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 17, 2015, 05:56:32 PM
When you get really tired, it becomes shadow spiders.

You thought you knew terror?  Stay awake for 96 hours.
:lulz:
Stay awake and dehydrated, my friends
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 29, 2016, 09:47:40 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 17, 2015, 05:56:32 PM
When you get really tired, it becomes shadow spiders.

You thought you knew terror?  Stay awake for 96 hours.

I know those feels.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on May 25, 2016, 05:54:54 PM
Me: ah, Fandom Wank.  I should read more of their greatest hits

Lizzie: Lolol.  Just as I should melt weed chocolate into some hot chocolate when I'm done with this project

Me: just as I should kill my boss, then eat his brains to steal his power

Lizzie: Don't forget his liver for his courage

Me: he doesn't have any of that

Lizzie: Lol. My final is done?! Not ? My brain is a liquid officially

Me: should've killed your boss and eaten their brain, to gain their power

Lizzie: My boss' husband is a cop.  Plus I'm a kiss up so that won't work.  I'll need to murder someone else

Me: murder her husband too

Lizzie: He's a sheriff, which might make it a felony?  Or it's one either way

Me: apparently so.  I just googled "is murdering a sheriff a felony". that will be fun to explain to the NSA
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Faust on June 03, 2016, 04:27:38 PM
Searched the line from Illuminatus/PD "So do many things come to pass" and found a dirty limerick

And so do many things come to pass...

There was a young monk of Hong Kong
Who had a three-headed dong
A small one for sucking
A BIG one for fucking
And an extra for beating the gong

Don't know why but it made my day

http://www.williamgibsonboard.com/topic/4393793104698672?page=2
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 07, 2016, 01:38:17 PM
So, I asked some flat-earthers on Reddit what the motivation was to "lie" about the earth's shape.  Here's the answer:

QuoteI'll tell you who profits: The globalists. If the world is flat, then it's a globalist secret and they're trying to deceive and control us, easy concept. Round earth disproves most religions. With those religions weakened, it paves the way for paganism/satanism, and specifically, destroying Christianity allows them to crank up the leftist propaganda to 11, and start pushing pedophilia, bestiality, and all that other fun stuff on the masses who don't even know what morals are anymore. It also makes the concept of aliens more believable, the next phase, as predictively programmed into us by movies like "The End of Tomorrow" with Tom Cruise, and science shills like Michiho Kaku, is to threaten Earth with a fake alien invasion, and coax every country in the world into uniting under one flag and one army, (and one economy while we're at it, since we're all destroying ourselves with socialism in the meantime) in order to combat the alien threat. If the world is round, then it could be a globalist psy-op (The UN logo is flat earth map, and with their military embargo on the south hemisphere they're obviously involved one way or another). Why would they do this? So they can weed out the people who don't trust their government when they eventually attempt a purge.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on September 07, 2016, 02:13:07 PM
Just.... Wow.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on September 07, 2016, 04:21:58 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 07, 2016, 01:38:17 PM
So, I asked some flat-earthers on Reddit what the motivation was to "lie" about the earth's shape.  Here's the answer:

QuoteI'll tell you who profits: The globalists. If the world is flat, then it's a globalist secret and they're trying to deceive and control us, easy concept. Round earth disproves most religions. With those religions weakened, it paves the way for paganism/satanism, and specifically, destroying Christianity allows them to crank up the leftist propaganda to 11, and start pushing pedophilia, bestiality, and all that other fun stuff on the masses who don't even know what morals are anymore. It also makes the concept of aliens more believable, the next phase, as predictively programmed into us by movies like "The End of Tomorrow" with Tom Cruise, and science shills like Michiho Kaku, is to threaten Earth with a fake alien invasion, and coax every country in the world into uniting under one flag and one army, (and one economy while we're at it, since we're all destroying ourselves with socialism in the meantime) in order to combat the alien threat. If the world is round, then it could be a globalist psy-op (The UN logo is flat earth map, and with their military embargo on the south hemisphere they're obviously involved one way or another). Why would they do this? So they can weed out the people who don't trust their government when they eventually attempt a purge.

Quoteflat earth map south hemisphere

Quoteflat earth map south hemisphere

Quoteflat earth map south hemisphere


Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Ziegejunge on September 07, 2016, 07:46:42 PM
Glad Alty pointed out the "south hemisphere" bit. It seems those dastardly globalists have been successful with their brainwashing and propaganda.

Also I haven't seen "The End of Tomorrow" with Tom Cruise. Would anyone like to venture as to why this clear-minded flat-Earther chose that movie in particular to illustrate their point of making "the concept of aliens more believable, the next phase" to us round-Earther sheeple?

I mean... is it better programming than the "Independence Day" movies, or [insert almost any sci-fi movie here]?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on September 07, 2016, 07:54:50 PM
Incidentally, it's "Edge of Tomorrow", and it's a time-travel conceit wrapped up in an alien invasion.  Like Source Code, but somehow worse.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 07, 2016, 08:26:12 PM
Quote from: LMNO on September 07, 2016, 07:54:50 PM
Incidentally, it's "Edge of Tomorrow", and it's a time-travel conceit wrapped up in an alien invasion.  Like Source Code, but somehow worse.

It was based on "All You Need is Kill", a very good Japanese novel.

So naturally, they cast a crazy white guy.  And then fucked the plot.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: minuspace on September 08, 2016, 01:48:02 AM
Given Fermi normals on two time-like geodesics (not denying the curvature of time), their intersection may define a locally flat metric space in the inertial frame of reference.  Further analysis may conclude that the observer is from a parallel universe, although it remains inconsequential to the resulting orthonormal tetrad.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on September 08, 2016, 02:26:34 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 07, 2016, 08:26:12 PM
Quote from: LMNO on September 07, 2016, 07:54:50 PM
Incidentally, it's "Edge of Tomorrow", and it's a time-travel conceit wrapped up in an alien invasion.  Like Source Code, but somehow worse.

It was based on "All You Need is Kill", a very good Japanese novel.

So naturally, they cast a crazy white guy.  And then fucked the plot.

It wasn't a bad film, that said, and Emily Blunt as Rita was an inspired choice IMO.  But yeah.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Ziegejunge on September 08, 2016, 05:57:35 PM
Cool beans. All you Need Is Kill is now on my reading list. Maybe someday I'll watch the Tom Cruise movie, but I'm in no great rush to do so.

Since this is the quote thread, I feel like I should probably add a quote to my derail. To the Vonnegut mine!

"We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be."
- Kurt Vonnegut
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on September 08, 2016, 09:46:50 PM
Quote from: Vivat Alty on September 07, 2016, 04:21:58 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 07, 2016, 01:38:17 PM
So, I asked some flat-earthers on Reddit what the motivation was to "lie" about the earth's shape.  Here's the answer:

QuoteI'll tell you who profits: The globalists. If the world is flat, then it's a globalist secret and they're trying to deceive and control us, easy concept. Round earth disproves most religions. With those religions weakened, it paves the way for paganism/satanism, and specifically, destroying Christianity allows them to crank up the leftist propaganda to 11, and start pushing pedophilia, bestiality, and all that other fun stuff on the masses who don't even know what morals are anymore. It also makes the concept of aliens more believable, the next phase, as predictively programmed into us by movies like "The End of Tomorrow" with Tom Cruise, and science shills like Michiho Kaku, is to threaten Earth with a fake alien invasion, and coax every country in the world into uniting under one flag and one army, (and one economy while we're at it, since we're all destroying ourselves with socialism in the meantime) in order to combat the alien threat. If the world is round, then it could be a globalist psy-op (The UN logo is flat earth map, and with their military embargo on the south hemisphere they're obviously involved one way or another). Why would they do this? So they can weed out the people who don't trust their government when they eventually attempt a purge.

Quoteflat earth map south hemisphere

Quoteflat earth map south hemisphere

Quoteflat earth map south hemisphere

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Faust on September 08, 2016, 10:08:04 PM
At least they are consistent, in their batshittery.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 15, 2016, 12:44:17 AM
Today at the grocery store, I grab a box of "Hibiscus Cleanse" tea, it's new. It's hibiscus, yerba mate, and mint. I got it because it sounded tasty. And then...


Her: "Does that stuff work?"
Me: "Hmm?"
Her: "Does that tea actually work as a detox?"
Me: "No, that's what my liver is for, I just like the taste of hibiscus, and it sounds good with mint."
Her: *confused face*


Hibiscus is a diuretic, but seriously, I just think it tastes good.  :kingmeh:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Freeky on September 15, 2016, 01:50:44 AM
Hibiscus is super-tasty.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Suu on September 15, 2016, 04:26:43 AM
Quote from: Freeky on September 15, 2016, 01:50:44 AM
Hibiscus is super-tasty.

It's fantastic, and super refreshing. I've brewed with it. I actually have BAGS of dried hibiscus in my cabinet that I harvested myself in Florida a few years ago, but this tea sounded lovely. And it is.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on November 16, 2016, 09:28:43 PM
"You're not going to get federal funding.  Your boss is flattening out into a radioactive pancake."
- Bruce Sterling
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on November 21, 2016, 02:57:05 PM
Quote from: SuuCal on September 15, 2016, 12:44:17 AM
Today at the grocery store, I grab a box of "Hibiscus Cleanse" tea, it's new. It's hibiscus, yerba mate, and mint. I got it because it sounded tasty. And then...


Her: "Does that stuff work?"
Me: "Hmm?"
Her: "Does that tea actually work as a detox?"
Me: "No, that's what my liver is for, I just like the taste of hibiscus, and it sounds good with mint."
Her: *confused face*


Hibiscus is a diuretic, but seriously, I just think it tastes good.  :kingmeh:

How the hell would you even tell? Sending all of your urine to a lab every day to test for "toxins"?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: minuspace on November 21, 2016, 05:05:07 PM
Quote from: Cainad (dec.) on November 21, 2016, 02:57:05 PM
Quote from: SuuCal on September 15, 2016, 12:44:17 AM
Today at the grocery store, I grab a box of "Hibiscus Cleanse" tea, it's new. It's hibiscus, yerba mate, and mint. I got it because it sounded tasty. And then...


Her: "Does that stuff work?"
Me: "Hmm?"
Her: "Does that tea actually work as a detox?"
Me: "No, that's what my liver is for, I just like the taste of hibiscus, and it sounds good with mint."
Her: *confused face*


Hibiscus is a diuretic, but seriously, I just think it tastes good.  :kingmeh:

How the hell would you even tell? Sending all of your urine to a lab every day to test for "toxins"?
It's good stuff, but I can't forgive wasting my toxins like that.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: minuspace on November 29, 2016, 10:08:46 PM
"Planning is not just guessing, it's harmful guessing."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on March 19, 2017, 07:25:47 PM
"The elites themselves believe they are racing using human technology to take our best minds and build some type of breakaway civilization, where they're going to merge with machines, transcend, and break away from the failed species that is Man. Which is kinda like a false transmission, because they're thinking that What They Are is ugly and bad, kinda projecting it upon themselves, rather than believing that no, it's a human test about building us UP.

And so, google was set up 18 or 19 years ago --and this, I knew about this before it was declassified, I'm just saying, I have good sources-- that they wanted to build a giant artificial system, and google believes that the first artificial intelligence will be a supercomputer, based on the neuron activities of the hive mind of humanity, with billion of people wired into it, the internet of things, so all of our thoughts go into it, and we're actually building a computer that has real neurons in real time, that's also psychically connected to us, that are organic creatures, so that They will have current predication powers, future prediction powers, a true crystal ball - but the big secret is: that once you have a crystal ball and can know the future, you can add stimuli before hand which make decisions and control the future, so it's the end of free will and consciousness for individuals as we know, and a true 2.0 - in a very bad way - hive mind consciousness with an AI jacked into everyone, knowing our hopes and dreams, delivering it to us not in some P.K.D. wire-head system where we plug in and give up on consciousness because of unlimited pleasure, but because we were already wired-in and absorbed before we knew it by giving over our consciousness to this system in our daily decisions, and allowing it to control our every decision."


-Abraham Lincoln (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZPCp8SPfOM&t=1h48m30s)
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on March 21, 2017, 05:51:47 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on March 19, 2017, 07:25:47 PM
"The elites themselves believe they are racing using human technology to take our best minds and build some type of breakaway civilization, where they're going to merge with machines, transcend, and break away from the failed species that is Man. Which is kinda like a false transmission, because they're thinking that What They Are is ugly and bad, kinda projecting it upon themselves, rather than believing that no, it's a human test about building us UP.

And so, google was set up 18 or 19 years ago --and this, I knew about this before it was declassified, I'm just saying, I have good sources-- that they wanted to build a giant artificial system, and google believes that the first artificial intelligence will be a supercomputer, based on the neuron activities of the hive mind of humanity, with billion of people wired into it, the internet of things, so all of our thoughts go into it, and we're actually building a computer that has real neurons in real time, that's also psychically connected to us, that are organic creatures, so that They will have current predication powers, future prediction powers, a true crystal ball - but the big secret is: that once you have a crystal ball and can know the future, you can add stimuli before hand which make decisions and control the future, so it's the end of free will and consciousness for individuals as we know, and a true 2.0 - in a very bad way - hive mind consciousness with an AI jacked into everyone, knowing our hopes and dreams, delivering it to us not in some P.K.D. wire-head system where we plug in and give up on consciousness because of unlimited pleasure, but because we were already wired-in and absorbed before we knew it by giving over our consciousness to this system in our daily decisions, and allowing it to control our every decision."


-Abraham Lincoln (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZPCp8SPfOM&t=1h48m30s)

I don't know what all the hubbub is about. What's so bad about having a hive mind and putting an end to individuality? What better way to get to know your neighbor than to be bombarded forever with the minutiae of their most offensive and impulsive thoughts?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on June 01, 2017, 05:31:57 PM
Ultra liberal classmate who hasn't worked in years because her wife works for a major shoe company:

QuoteI hate homeless people, they're trash. I want them to pay property tax. I don't understand why I have to pay property tax and they don't.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on June 01, 2017, 06:33:45 PM
I hate dead people, they're trash.  Why do living people have to pay for taxes while dead people don't?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 01, 2017, 07:09:04 PM
What really burns me up is that cyclists don't have to pay gas tax. And don't even get me started on how not everyone has to pay business taxes... why should some people be exempt just because they work for someone else?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 01, 2017, 07:10:40 PM
And luxury taxes... if I have to pay a luxury tax just because I buy a yacht, why don't other people who don't buy yachts have to pay it too? Not buying a yacht is no excuse to not pay taxes!
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Junkenstein on June 01, 2017, 07:33:38 PM
Quote from: Salty on June 01, 2017, 05:31:57 PM
Ultra liberal classmate who hasn't worked in years because her wife works for a major shoe company:

QuoteI hate homeless people, they're trash. I want them to pay property tax. I don't understand why I have to pay property tax and they don't.

"Ultra liberal" you say? Evidence suggests otherwise.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on June 01, 2017, 07:36:51 PM
You'd be surprised how many self-proclaimed "ultra liberals" are really "I don't want my privilege to be intruded upon".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on June 01, 2017, 08:00:39 PM
Oh yeah. I have run into so many liberals and progressives here who only avoid association with any standard redneck conservative because they don't actively hate other races and/or are gay.

That's about it. They're still racist AF, and prejudiced toward anyone who isn't like them, more or less. Those with comfortable lives are basically worthless sacks of meat.

While doing foot massage in one of the fancier areas of town, I encountered so many liberal-on-paper people working for Nike. They eat gluten free, they vote Democrat, and a lot of them are feminists. A lot of them can't see past their own noses.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on June 01, 2017, 08:42:58 PM
Quote from: Salty on June 01, 2017, 08:00:39 PM
Oh yeah. I have run into so many liberals and progressives here who only avoid association with any standard redneck conservative because they don't actively hate other races and/or are gay.

That's about it. They're still racist AF, and prejudiced toward anyone who isn't like them, more or less. Those with comfortable lives are basically worthless sacks of meat.

While doing foot massage in one of the fancier areas of town, I encountered so many liberal-on-paper people working for Nike. They eat gluten free, they vote Democrat, and a lot of them are feminists. A lot of them can't see past their own noses paychecks.

Fixt.  But to be fair, that's kind of a human condition.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Salty on June 01, 2017, 08:51:06 PM
Quote from: LMNO on June 01, 2017, 08:42:58 PM
Quote from: Salty on June 01, 2017, 08:00:39 PM
Oh yeah. I have run into so many liberals and progressives here who only avoid association with any standard redneck conservative because they don't actively hate other races and/or are gay.

That's about it. They're still racist AF, and prejudiced toward anyone who isn't like them, more or less. Those with comfortable lives are basically worthless sacks of meat.

While doing foot massage in one of the fancier areas of town, I encountered so many liberal-on-paper people working for Nike. They eat gluten free, they vote Democrat, and a lot of them are feminists. A lot of them can't see past their own noses paychecks.

Fixt.  But to be fair, that's kind of a human condition.

Good point.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 02, 2017, 12:35:00 AM
Quote from: LMNO on June 01, 2017, 07:36:51 PM
You'd be surprised how many self-proclaimed "ultra liberals" are really "I don't want my privilege to be intruded upon".

YES THIS YES THIS.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 02, 2017, 12:45:13 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 01, 2017, 08:00:39 PM
Oh yeah. I have run into so many liberals and progressives here who only avoid association with any standard redneck conservative because they don't actively hate other races and/or are gay.

That's about it. They're still racist AF, and prejudiced toward anyone who isn't like them, more or less. Those with comfortable lives are basically worthless sacks of meat.

While doing foot massage in one of the fancier areas of town, I encountered so many liberal-on-paper people working for Nike. They eat gluten free, they vote Democrat, and a lot of them are feminists. A lot of them can't see past their own noses.

These are the type of liberals who will argue all day that racist shit they personally enjoy is not really racist, and are eager to point out all the ways feminists are doin it rong. The ones who are all "Your attitude is alienating your allies!" if you point out anything that makes them at all uncomfortable or challenges their behavior. They also tend to have weird double standards about who "should be" entitled to government support that skirt around issues of racism without ever flat out saying that they don't think black people in ghettoes should be able to get welfare. You could call then "LINOs" I guess, but I think the reality is that they are people who have clued into the fact that things SHOULD be better than they are, but haven't quite done the work to shake off the racist, misogynistic, Calvinist indoctrination of mainstream culture, and are a little too privileged to care enough to do so.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on June 03, 2017, 03:17:08 AM
In the course of some pointless Internet argument somewhere:
QuoteThe truth is more important than the facts.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on July 25, 2018, 08:22:09 PM
QuoteThe Times said Trump raged at his staff for breaking a rule that each trip begin tuned to Fox.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on February 06, 2019, 05:21:01 PM
All people are dead, except those who know.
All those who know are dead, except those who practice.
All those who practice are dead, except those who act.
All those who act are lost, except those who act with righteous intent.
And those who act with righteous intent
are all in grave danger.


-Dzou'l-Noun, 12th century Sufi poet
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Telarus on March 04, 2019, 11:26:10 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on February 06, 2019, 05:21:01 PM
All people are dead, except those who know.
All those who know are dead, except those who practice.
All those who practice are dead, except those who act.
All those who act are lost, except those who act with righteous intent.
And those who act with righteous intent
are all in grave danger.


-Dzou'l-Noun, 12th century Sufi poet

:mittens:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on September 12, 2019, 02:58:01 PM
QuoteThe Vapor Technology Association has reported spending $78,000 this year in its lobbying fight against California's proposed flavored e-cigarettes ban, while one of the world's largest tobacco producers, Altria, reported spending over $100,000 last fall solely to lobby such legislation. The bills have since stalled.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on January 23, 2020, 02:49:33 PM
introducing yourself on webforums fifteen years ago like:
You: uhhhhh hi I'm new i guess, just wanna chat about my favorite show too or whatever

iNvAd3rJ1M posted: *pounces* HELLOoOOOO NEW PERSON!!! *throws confetti*

911_NVR-FRGT posted: Hi there! You'll find a Relaxed Atmosphere Here in Our Community! *points* Beer is In The Fridge, Curfew Is At 9! Haha I'm old

SSJgoku1994 posted: I am a pineapple! Monkeys!!!!!

Drag0n~Swords posted: Forsooth, a stranger doth enter the realm!

dumbledoreftw posted: Welcome! Hope you stick around! We don't bite..... much!!

Greg posted: HITLER WAS A MISUNDERSTOOD GENIUS AND ILL GIVE YOUR WHOLE FAMILY AIDS IN HELL YOU PIECE OF SHIT

Lady*Unicorns*76 posted: "lol" (Laughing Out Loud!) don't worry about greg sweetie! He's just our little pet troll and you get used to him!! ;-) <3<3<3




from https://bogleech.tumblr.com/post/162810989013/introducing-yourself-on-webforums-fifteen-years
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on January 23, 2020, 03:06:35 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on January 23, 2020, 02:49:33 PM
introducing yourself on webforums fifteen years ago like:
You: uhhhhh hi I'm new i guess, just wanna chat about my favorite show too or whatever

iNvAd3rJ1M posted: *pounces* HELLOoOOOO NEW PERSON!!! *throws confetti*

911_NVR-FRGT posted: Hi there! You'll find a Relaxed Atmosphere Here in Our Community! *points* Beer is In The Fridge, Curfew Is At 9! Haha I'm old

SSJgoku1994 posted: I am a pineapple! Monkeys!!!!!

Drag0n~Swords posted: Forsooth, a stranger doth enter the realm!

dumbledoreftw posted: Welcome! Hope you stick around! We don't bite..... much!!

Greg posted: HITLER WAS A MISUNDERSTOOD GENIUS AND ILL GIVE YOUR WHOLE FAMILY AIDS IN HELL YOU PIECE OF SHIT

Lady*Unicorns*76 posted: "lol" (Laughing Out Loud!) don't worry about greg sweetie! He's just our little pet troll and you get used to him!! ;-) <3<3<3




from https://bogleech.tumblr.com/post/162810989013/introducing-yourself-on-webforums-fifteen-years

Someone needs to claim being the "board mom".
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on January 23, 2020, 03:36:00 PM
*glomps your head*

:argh!: :lulz: :) :sad: :eek: 8) :cry: :oops: :evil: :x :lol: :roll: :p :| :wink: :evilmad: :fnord: :fap: :kingmeh: :horrormirth: :aaa: :?  :argh!: :lulz: :) :sad: :eek: 8) :cry: :oops: :evil: :x :lol: :roll: :p :| :wink: :evilmad: :fnord: :fap: :kingmeh: :horrormirth: :aaa: :?  :argh!: :lulz: :) :sad: :eek: 8) :cry: :oops: :evil: :x :lol: :roll: :p :| :wink: :evilmad: :fnord: :fap: :kingmeh: :horrormirth: :aaa: :?  :argh!: :lulz: :) :sad: :eek: 8) :cry: :oops: :evil: :x :lol: :roll: :p :| :wink: :evilmad: :fnord: :fap: :kingmeh: :horrormirth: :aaa: :?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on January 23, 2020, 03:39:51 PM
*meep*
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on January 23, 2020, 03:43:42 PM
A/S/L?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on January 23, 2020, 03:51:31 PM
Pool's on the roof  :lulz:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on January 23, 2020, 04:07:22 PM
 :titsorgtfo:
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on April 10, 2020, 03:52:51 PM
from a news article - but posted without context

Quote"We can't get a budget passed that doesn't cut health care during a pandemic," another legislator told me bitterly, "and everyone's talking about his fucking nipples."
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on April 27, 2020, 02:42:36 PM
Quotemom can you come pick me up? there's a wh!te boy who thinks pissing people off is a cool & interesting personality trait

[s (https://www.facebook.com/oxyripley/posts/987977518265773)]
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on May 20, 2020, 02:11:24 PM
Joe Rogan is the Alex Jones of Sam Harris.

[s (https://www.facebook.com/socraticmemes/posts/3049842285097466)]
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on May 28, 2020, 04:26:12 PM
"In a universe that defies description, all systems of belief can only be false."

-Austin Osman Spare



this quote is on my mind this morning, as I read a post from friend who is a red-state health care professional saying that we should make up our own minds about whether masks are effective.

She points out that the CDC doesn't agree with the WHO (the CDC says masks help slow the spread, the WHO says that masks may help but not much). Regardless of that, is the message that we random people, with no medical training, should regard the CDC's advice as untrustworthy?

The WHO was right when its director said that we should avoid politicizing the disease or our response to it. Once it was political, truth (little-T) became a function of power.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: chaotic neutral observer on May 28, 2020, 04:58:45 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on May 28, 2020, 04:26:12 PM
"In a universe that defies description, all systems of belief can only be false."

-Austin Osman Spare

When people thought the Earth was flat, they were wrong. When people thought the Earth was spherical, they were wrong. But if you think that thinking the Earth is spherical is just as wrong as thinking the Earth is flat, then your view is wronger than both of them put together.

-Isaac Asimov
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on June 01, 2020, 09:03:40 PM
that line is taken out of context, we need to know what led to the boot stomping on the human face, forever
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cain on June 01, 2020, 10:12:03 PM
Have you considered the compromise position, of a boot stamping on half of humanity's faces, for forever?
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: LMNO on June 02, 2020, 12:47:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on June 01, 2020, 10:12:03 PM
Have you considered the compromise position, of a boot stamping on half of humanity's faces, for forever?

Also known as the "status quo", I believe.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on June 16, 2020, 03:37:15 PM
as the days blur together into a monotonous paste, I think about these words:

"Today is what it is because yesterday was what it was. So too, if you want tomorrow to be different, you must make today different."   -Gurdjieff
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Doktor Howl on June 16, 2020, 07:43:45 PM
Quote from: LMNO on June 02, 2020, 12:47:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on June 01, 2020, 10:12:03 PM
Have you considered the compromise position, of a boot stamping on half of humanity's faces, for forever?

Also known as the "status quo", I believe.

Ho ho ho!  It can and will get a lot worse than this.  If Trump is ousted, we might get 8 years before the authoritarians run the show entirely.

If he is reelected, this is as good as it will ever get.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on June 30, 2020, 07:09:10 PM
US troops parachuting into a small village

VILLAGER: Fuck all of you
SOLDIER 1: (voice drowned out by machine gun fire) Woah woah woah, yes there may be some bad apples here, but don't paint us all with the same brush.
SOLDIER 2: You should really focus on the economic issues underlying our invasion.
SOLDIER 3: Give us a break, it's a hard job and our morale is at an all time low.
SOLDIER 4: funny how you have no objections when you kill each other, but when we do it? sheesh
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: minuspace on June 30, 2020, 08:10:21 PM
QuoteYou can't pursue equality and grovel at the same time.
- Eric Weinstein
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on July 06, 2020, 09:10:29 PM
"Kanye West could shoot Trump in the middle of Fifth Avenue and I'd still vote for Joe Biden."

-some guy on fb
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: chaotic neutral observer on July 14, 2020, 03:10:20 PM
As the work-from-home meeting starts, co-worker B is experiencing problems with his microphone.

Co-worker C: "if it helps, it sounds like a chipmunk attempting to modulate its voice using a swarm of bees"
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on July 15, 2020, 02:42:57 PM
the holy grail is not a trophy
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on July 24, 2020, 02:45:51 PM
Jesus says: "Men indeed think I have come to bring peace to the world. But they do not know that I have come to bring the world discord, fire, sword, war. Indeed, if there are five <people> in a house, they will become three against two and two against three - father against son and son against father - and they will be lifted up, being solitaries."

Gospel Thomas, 16.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on July 26, 2020, 10:54:47 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 16, 2020, 07:43:45 PM
Quote from: LMNO on June 02, 2020, 12:47:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on June 01, 2020, 10:12:03 PM
Have you considered the compromise position, of a boot stamping on half of humanity's faces, for forever?

Also known as the "status quo", I believe.

Ho ho ho!  It can and will get a lot worse than this.  If Trump is ousted, we might get 8 years before the authoritarians run the show entirely.

If he is reelected, this is as good as it will ever get.

My understanding of history is that more or less is status quo, for decaying empires.

Only this time, we're gonna do it BIGGER and DUMBER than any of those pre-nuclear loser empires.
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: minuspace on July 26, 2020, 11:55:55 PM
That's moar like it
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: altered on July 27, 2020, 01:53:40 AM
Quote from: Cainad (dec.) on July 26, 2020, 10:54:47 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 16, 2020, 07:43:45 PM
Quote from: LMNO on June 02, 2020, 12:47:18 PM
Quote from: Cain on June 01, 2020, 10:12:03 PM
Have you considered the compromise position, of a boot stamping on half of humanity's faces, for forever?

Also known as the "status quo", I believe.

Ho ho ho!  It can and will get a lot worse than this.  If Trump is ousted, we might get 8 years before the authoritarians run the show entirely.

If he is reelected, this is as good as it will ever get.

My understanding of history is that more or less is status quo, for decaying empires.

Only this time, we're gonna do it BIGGER and DUMBER than any of those pre-nuclear loser empires.

Fucking cainad is back again, everyone hide your silverware and goats

Also he's right
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Cramulus on March 07, 2021, 05:18:43 PM
"I didn't want to be a cog in a machine. I wanted to be a cog running free, doing what it wanted. Cogging around, having a good time."   -John Swartzwelder
Title: Re: Quotes of the Moment II
Post by: Drake75 on March 10, 2021, 10:57:10 AM
Quote from: Cramulus on June 30, 2020, 07:09:10 PM
US troops parachuting into a small village

VILLAGER: Fuck all of you
SOLDIER 1: (voice drowned out by machine gun fire) Woah woah woah, yes there may be some bad apples here, but don't paint us all with the same brush.
SOLDIER 2: You should really focus on the economic issues underlying our invasion.
SOLDIER 3: Give us a break, it's a hard job and our morale is at an all time low.
SOLDIER 4: funny how you have no objections when you kill each other, but when we do it? sheesh

Oh, OH! I can write a SOLDIER 5 for you.
Hang on, and it might be sloppy or not include all of potential...

SOLDIER 5: I come with only that which I have loaded in with, and can offer no more without losing what I have left. May you have that which I cannot give myself by the end of this.