Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Or Kill Me => Topic started by: Da6s on June 07, 2017, 06:07:02 AM

Title: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 07, 2017, 06:07:02 AM
I fell off the goddamned mountain.

Like, I fucking fell fell  http://via.kdvr.com/TKVrx (http://via.kdvr.com/TKVrx)

So I'm writing this. Well. Starting to write this. On 4 pillows, 10 MG oxycodone, some muscle relaxer, 3 broken ribs, a punctured lung, countless scabs and bruises, and a shattered right shoulder blade or scapula if you prefer. There were a few brain contusions too, but I think those are mostly healed now, because fuck yeah helmets.

We'll see how deep it goes.

I've always been into man vs nature sports. Hence why I snowboard, hike, am into cross country/trail running, and had the itch to dabble in sport bow hunting and mtn biking for years. In high school, I briefly got into climbing with a friend that had all the gear. Loved it, hella fun sport. After I moved to Boulder prior to the navy mistake, I joined a climbing gym, bought all my own gear sans rope and some route setting equipment. Did it for a few months, then the navy made quit because I "could get injured". Horseshit I thought. I think they were onto something.

Moved back to Boulder last year, joined climbing gym again, got back into it. Made some climbing friends, and had been going outdoor climbing with them a few times. They were more experienced than I, but helped me to learn a ton and improve a lot more.

We went climbing in boulder Canyon the Sunday before memorial day. It was my last climb of 2017.

We started out pulley hanging ourselves across Boulder creek (river). First time for me, I did it fine. Found our climbing area, which was this awkward belay anchor area partway up a cliff face with sketchy footing. We climb a few routes. I do my first rope swing route which was a lot of fucking fun.

I break to eat. I eat a wrap of Boulder hippie food kind overlooking Boulder falls. I take a pic of said falls. My phone case, galaxy s7 edge, is magnetic. It slides off and drops onto an outcropping ledge 5 feet below me. Shit, I better get that because leave no trace. 5 foot scramble, no big deal. Fuck I was wrong.

I get to the ledge where my phone case rests, and it fucking gives way under both my feet. I slide, roll, tumble, claw, grasp, and flail down a roughly 50 foot drop. I'm stopped by a tree thwacking me across my back near the river. I stop. I lose consciousness at some point - multiple concussions will do that I hear. I'm rescued and evac'd by a rando hiker tourist and my friends. I have brief spans of memory from Sunday. I don't remember the ambulance ride. I don't remember the start of the emergency room. I remember being told they were giving me ketamine, my first time, which would explain the memory loss.

Edit 1: So I went to retrieve the phone case, ledge gives way, and I fall. from this point (Sunday around 3) until Tuesday, my memory is hazy from the multiple Ketamine IV's. I remember repeatedly being asked if I was ok, what's my name, who's the president. I was held steady, hoisted, ferried like a loved martyr, and then sherpa'd across the river onto a black ambulance. I don't remember the ride to the hospital. I don't remember arriving at the hospital. i have blurred memory sections of being in a hspital bed, being told I'm being given ketamine, asking my info, being told I had brain bleeding and 3 contusions. I remember the sensation of the first morphine IV they gave me that took all the pain away. I remember being told I had a punctured lung and being surprised at how I couldn't tell.

All things considered, I'm really fucking lucky. It wasn't an insignificant distance that I fell. Walking away from it is pretty damned bad ass. I'm realizing it's pretty fucking rad that I'm still alive. It wasn't really an accident out of gross negligence or fucking around - I was off belay, had just finished lunch, and was still in the "base/belay anchor area", just unnclipped, scrambled down an easy 5 feet to retrieve gear litter because leave no trace, ledge gave way, and i took a tumble. Arms and legs covered in scabs, body in general pain, shoulder and ribs sore as fuck, and it REALLY goddamned hurts to laugh.

Butttt I'ma be fully recovered with no last injuries in another 4 weeks, because im a hard ass motherfucker like that who don't take no shit from gravity and measly 50 foot falls that only serve to cull away the genetically inferior. I also spec'd into luck, as you naturally should do when starting your playthrough.

I'm now grounded from climbing and snowboarding for 6 months.
I'm in hella pain recovery for. 5sh weeks. Not paralyzed, full recovery expected, just lots of pain.

I may compound on this moreso later, but meds kicking in and I'm sleepy.

Or kill me. Because gravity is a bitch and couldn't do. It.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on June 07, 2017, 07:27:01 AM
Ouch! Sounds like you had quite a day. Glad to hear you survived it.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Eater of Clowns on June 07, 2017, 11:47:01 AM
Holy shit dude! Glad you're not dead.

How many times does this have to happen before people start keeping their mountains on a leash? I know nobody is trying to raise a viscous attack mountain like those rotten Tibetans, but it only takes one bad moment.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: LMNO on June 07, 2017, 01:42:13 PM
Damn, man.  Glad you're still alive.

Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on June 07, 2017, 02:56:38 PM
Shit. Glad you'll make a full recovery
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on June 07, 2017, 03:45:53 PM
Damn, glad you didn't die!
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Ziegejunge on June 07, 2017, 06:02:42 PM
Best wishes as you recover! You must be cut from some pretty tough cloth. Glad your injuries weren't any worse!
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 07, 2017, 10:29:34 PM
Thanks for goodwishes all. Posted an update just now with some more details and ranty style KERPLAH.

But for real, i'm a lucky SOB.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: LMNO on June 07, 2017, 10:47:25 PM
Yeah, but what about the cellphone case, huh?


You only think of yourself and your massive, life-threatening trauma.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Salty on June 07, 2017, 10:51:09 PM
That awful, I'm so sorry and glad you didn't die!









On the other hand, for the rest of your life you get to tell people you're really bad at falling to your death. So, that's a win.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Eater of Clowns on June 08, 2017, 02:51:16 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 07, 2017, 10:51:09 PM
That awful, I'm so sorry and glad you didn't die!









On the other hand, for the rest of your life you get to tell people you're really bad at falling to your death. So, that's a win.
I dunno. I'm so bad at it that I've never come even near as close as Da6s.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Salty on June 08, 2017, 03:32:04 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on June 08, 2017, 02:51:16 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 07, 2017, 10:51:09 PM
That awful, I'm so sorry and glad you didn't die!









On the other hand, for the rest of your life you get to tell people you're really bad at falling to your death. So, that's a win.
I dunno. I'm so bad at it that I've never come even near as close as Da6s.

I think the caveat here is that you have to actually fall. To be worse at it than Da6s, you'd have to fall at least 51 ft without dying.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 08, 2017, 07:21:11 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 08, 2017, 03:32:04 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on June 08, 2017, 02:51:16 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 07, 2017, 10:51:09 PM
That awful, I'm so sorry and glad you didn't die!

On the other hand, for the rest of your life you get to tell people you're really bad at falling to your death. So, that's a win.
I dunno. I'm so bad at it that I've never come even near as close as Da6s.

I think the caveat here is that you have to actually fall. To be worse at it than Da6s, you'd have to fall at least 51 ft without dying.

I don't openly endorse this new measurement of badassery
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on June 08, 2017, 11:08:04 AM
I fucking totally do  :evil:
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 08, 2017, 12:02:28 PM
Good job not being dead yet!

Please accept this friendly reminder to count this incident as a major concussion when considering further risks in the future. Most brains can handle a few, but you don't want to go around falling off horses or getting beat with blunt objects if you've already got half a dozen doozies under your belt.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: LMNO on June 08, 2017, 12:53:43 PM
Quote from: Da6s on June 08, 2017, 07:21:11 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 08, 2017, 03:32:04 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on June 08, 2017, 02:51:16 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 07, 2017, 10:51:09 PM
That awful, I'm so sorry and glad you didn't die!

On the other hand, for the rest of your life you get to tell people you're really bad at falling to your death. So, that's a win.
I dunno. I'm so bad at it that I've never come even near as close as Da6s.

I think the caveat here is that you have to actually fall. To be worse at it than Da6s, you'd have to fall at least 51 ft without dying.

I don't openly endorse this new measurement of badassery

It's either this, or back to the oranges.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 08, 2017, 01:51:30 PM
Quote from: LMNO on June 08, 2017, 12:53:43 PM
Quote from: Da6s on June 08, 2017, 07:21:11 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 08, 2017, 03:32:04 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on June 08, 2017, 02:51:16 AM
Quote from: Salty on June 07, 2017, 10:51:09 PM
That awful, I'm so sorry and glad you didn't die!

On the other hand, for the rest of your life you get to tell people you're really bad at falling to your death. So, that's a win.
I dunno. I'm so bad at it that I've never come even near as close as Da6s.

I think the caveat here is that you have to actually fall. To be worse at it than Da6s, you'd have to fall at least 51 ft without dying.

I don't openly endorse this new measurement of badassery

It's either this, or back to the oranges.


(http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/facebook/000/003/758/Rape-Ewok-PREPARE-YOUR-ANUS.jpg)
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 08, 2017, 01:56:46 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 08, 2017, 12:02:28 PM
Good job not being dead yet!

Please accept this friendly reminder to count this incident as a major concussion when considering further risks in the future. Most brains can handle a few, but you don't want to go around falling off horses or getting beat with blunt objects if you've already got half a dozen doozies under your belt.

Actually had brain doc visit yesterday, have a follow up with her end of July for test and final confirmation of no lasting damage. First concussion and first time being knocked unconscious that I can remember, have snowboarded in a helmet for years, so pretty optimistic of my outlook at this point.

Today is trauma doc to cover my punctured lung and everything that isn't my shattered shoulder blade.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: LMNO on June 08, 2017, 02:30:48 PM
Morbid curiosity -- You said you didn't really notice when your lung got punctured.  What's it like now?

I've never had the chance to talk directly to someone to whom this has happened.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 08, 2017, 03:09:47 PM
Quote from: LMNO on June 08, 2017, 02:30:48 PM
Morbid curiosity -- You said you didn't really notice when your lung got punctured.  What's it like now?

I've never had the chance to talk directly to someone to whom this has happened.

Feels like a side stitch from running everytime I breathe in fully/deeply. Deep breath exhale feels winded, like trying to catch your breath after a sprint.

Hurts sharply like a cramp anytime I laugh.

You mainly just feel like you're in after-running winded and trying to get your breathing to normal constantly. Only really noticeable on deep breaths
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on June 08, 2017, 03:20:17 PM
Interesting, a lot of that sounds similar to cracked ribs?
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 08, 2017, 04:10:36 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on June 08, 2017, 03:20:17 PM
Interesting, a lot of that sounds similar to cracked ribs?

Well, I have 3 broke ribs, and top right rib punctured right lung as it broke, so it's possible I'm only feeling the ribs and can't tell anything from my lung itself.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on June 08, 2017, 07:17:00 PM
I was assuming you'd had cracked ribs before. Seemed a bit extreme for a first sporting injury. Might I suggest snapping an ankle or two and then building up from there. Take it slow til you get a good feel for it :lulz:
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Cramulus on June 08, 2017, 09:01:14 PM
Jeeeesus Dags! That's horrible. Really glad you're okay. Any landing you can walk away from, right? Sheesh.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 09, 2017, 01:54:25 AM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on June 08, 2017, 07:17:00 PM
I was assuming you'd had cracked ribs before. Seemed a bit extreme for a first sporting injury. Might I suggest snapping an ankle or two and then building up from there. Take it slow til you get a good feel for it :lulz:

I probably fucked my knee up my 2nd or 3rd winter living on resort, but never got it fully checked. Mostly just bruises, scrapes, and general aches. Never had to ride the sled of shame until this one. First real sport injury, and it was a hell of one at that.

Trauma doc today regarding ribs, xray shows them mostly healed with right lung still only at about 80% - doc said some more breathing practice should address that.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 09, 2017, 01:58:38 AM
Quote from: Cramulus on June 08, 2017, 09:01:14 PM
Any landing you can walk away from, right? Sheesh.

I really wish there was a vid of the fall proper. I so would've made jerryoftheday with it if there was. There some other pics on other news articles - Google "Boulder Canyon climber fall 30" and my nameless story should be the majority of the hits - I specifically remember telling a reporter they couldn't  use my name, and I'm very glad I was coherent enough for that one.

Been like 3 years since someone called me dags. Still not that long gone stranger.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: minuspace on June 09, 2017, 04:02:49 AM
 Best'tya healing fast and proper, and mad props for teaching gravity a lesson :)
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on June 20, 2017, 08:32:02 AM
Just read for 2 hours, which the brain doc told me was a really good sign that my concussion  healing properly..if only my fucking shoulder and ribs would follow suit. Shoulders gotten worse the past week, which hopefully means this is the crux, and ribs still hurt like fuck anytime I cough - coughing fits bring me to tears especially.

Mostly at this point im just going fucking stir crazy from my newfound worthless slothful lifestyle.

Fuck this shit. Like, I want to climb again when it's safe, but fuck me this recovery is awful. Going to be over hella cautious about all danger. At least that's my current outlook.

Tried remembering more and more and more of the fall and the icu days, but it's just hazy. Really wish they hadn't given me ketamine. I understand the benefit, but I fucking hate the memory gaps it's caused.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: Da6s on July 12, 2017, 11:00:20 PM
6 weeks and change since my fall. 4 days into cold turkey quitting the opiates I've been on 24/7 for 6 weeks straight. No cravings, so not addicted, but absolutely experiencing withdrawals. Been sick since Monday. Lost probably 10 pounds. This sucks. Not being able to sleep had been the worst part.

Unfortunately, I tried other methods for pain management and none of them worked until last week when it had a major change.

Follow up appointments next week. We'll see how it goes. Have maybe 80% range of motion in right arm back. Can't reach directly above head.

Have tickets to see Garbage on Sunday. Kinda worried concussion has made me unable to handle multidirectional noisy crowds. I really hope that isn't the case, but some restaurants have given me immediate onset headaches.
Title: Re: Kesha's yelling timber
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on July 13, 2017, 01:02:17 AM
I am glad to hear you are recovering.

I advise you to avoid nature in the future.  It's always bad for you.