Hear ye! Hear ye!
I come bearing curios and elixers of all sorts. Tonics, Oils, Salves, Butt Powders, you name it, I've got it.
Today, however, I come bearing a rather rare and strange tincture. This tincture can only be made under very special conditions. Let me tell you how I came into possession of this rare alchemical potion.
But first, let explain something about the alchemy of personality. Personality is a very particular brew. To create a personality tincture, you take one part Motivation, distill it with alcohol, and suspend it in a social network. Because the ingredients are so specific, you can never create the same personality twice. If you take the same person and immerse him in two different social baths, you will get two different personalities.
So what happens if you take a group of people, suspend them in a social network like this forum, and then suspend the same people in a very different social network, let's say the forums at Wicca.com? You'll end up with people connected to two different personalities.
If you let the tincture stand for long enough, certain psychic elements will divide themselves between the two personalities. Perhaps the nice parts will go to one end, the nasty to the other. Perhaps the person uses one personality to express drives which cannot be expressed by the other. At this point, the two personalities are very different. Practically separate people, with their own methods, posting styles, and social relationships.
And here's where the alchemy comes in..
Remember how the personality is intimately connected with the social network? If you mix up the two social networks, what do you think happens to the personalities?
My tincture is created by taking somebody from principiadiscordia.com, having them project certain parts of themselves into a social network on wicca.com, and forming certain relationships. Then, when the citizens of wicca.com come to PD.com, the person in question becomes very confused. He cannot figure out how to relate to the newcomers, as he has already established relationships with them through a very different personality.
As I said, this is a very rare and special tincture I'm peddling. It is liquid cognitive dissonance. One sip and it will shift your entire mental checkerboard. But before you sample it, you may want to put on some adult diapers, which I also happen to have for sale.
Brave enough to try it? Step right up...
