Principia Discordia

Dear Abby
P.O. Box 69440
Los Angeles
CA 90069

I am sure we can get this woman to publish in national (international? do any brits/aussies get Dear Abby?) papers a letter about a friend who recently joined this "cult" called Discordja.

I'll write up a letter to show what I'm thinking later today.

:mittens:

Good idea! Let's flood her!

Ofuk, WIN. We can flood other, lesser-known advice columnists too.

Post the columns if/when they come out. I don't get the newspaper.

I'm on the road right now and can't mail anything, so anyone can take this and use it:
~~~~~~

Dear Abby,

I've always tried to be accepting of other people's religions, especially those of my friends, but lately one of my closest friends (we'll call him "Bob") has been going overboard. He claims to be part of this cult called Discordianism, which he says is 'a joke disguised as a religion and a religion disguised as a joke' or something like that. Now he laughs at all kinds of jokes I don't get, is outrageously suspicious of government activities, and is generally just acting weird. I don't know what to do! He hasn't done anything harmful yet, but I think being part of this "religion" that refuses to take anything seriously could be harmful to "Bob's" mental health. Even worse, he could get other people in on this act, and from what I've read in their supposed holy book (The Principia Discordia), having too many Discordians in one place could be disastrous. Please help!

Yours,
Greg Hill

The key will be to make it sound bad enough to get her attention but good enough that some people will want to learn more.

I think Cainad has it right for that, but his text could use some tweaking to be more convincing.
Let's see here:

Dear Abby,

I've try to be accepting of other people's religions, especially when it comes to my friends, but I think one of my closest friends (we'll call him "Bob") is going too far. He claims to be part of this group called Discordianism, which he says is 'a joke disguised as a religion and a religion disguised as a joke' or something like that. I think it's some kind of hippie cult. Now he laughs at all kinds of jokes I don't get, is outrageously suspicious of government activities, and just acts real weird. I don't know what to do! He hasn't done anything harmful, but I think being part of this "religion" that refuses to take anything seriously could be harmful to "Bob's" mental health. Even worse, he could get other people in on this act, and from what I've read in their supposed holy book, having too many Discordians in one place could be dangerous - not only to them, but to anyone else they get their hands on. Please help!

Yours,
Greg Hill

Quote from: st.verbatim on March 26, 2008, 01:17:14 AM
I think Cainad has it right for that, but his text could use some tweaking to be more convincing.
Let's see here:

Dear Abby,

I've tried to be accepting of other people's religions, especially when it comes to my friends, but I think one of my closest friends (we'll call him "Bob") is going too far. He claims to be part of this group called Discordianism, which he says is 'a joke disguised as a religion and a religion disguised as a joke' or something like that. I think it's some kind of hippie cult. Now he laughs at all kinds of jokes I don't get, is outrageously suspicious of government activities, and just acts real weird. I don't know what to do! He hasn't done anything harmful, but I think being part of this "religion" that refuses to take anything seriously could be harmful to "Bob's" mental health. Even worse, he could get other people in on this act, and from what I've read in their supposed holy book, having too many Discordians in one place could be dangerous - not only to them, but to anyone else they get their hands on. Please help!

Yours,
Greg Hill

fixx0r'd

And you're right, that does a bit more like something you would read in a newspaper advice column.

:mittens:

I actually meant "I try..." but whatever. I was teh tiredz.

 :lulz: I like this.

A Dutch translation for the few, unproud dutchies here.

{couldn't think of an example},

Ik heb altijd geprobeerd respect te hebben voor andermans religie, vooral als het om mijn vrienden gaat maar ik geloof dat een van mijn beste vrienden (laten we hem "Bob" noemen) aan het doorslaan is. Hij zegt dat hij lid is van een club die discordianisme heet, hij zegt dat het een grap vermomd als religie en tegelijk een religie vermomd als grap is of zoiets. Volgens mij is het een sekte. Hij lacht nu voortdurend om 'grappen' waar ik neits van snap, is ongelofelijk wantrouwig ten opzichte van de regering geworden, en gedraagd zich steeds vreemder. Ik weet niet wat ik moet doen! Hij heeft nog niemand kwaad gedaan, maar ik denk dat deel zijn van deze "religie" die niets serieus neemt schadelijk voor "Bob" zijn geestelijke gezondheid is. En wat nou als hij anderen overhaalt om mee te doen? En volgens hun zogenaamde heilige geschriften kan het gevaarlijk zijn om te veel discordianen op een plek te hebben, niet aleen voor hunzelf  maar ook voor iedereen die ze te pakken kunnen krijgen. Help me Alsjeblieft!


Bij voorbaat dank,
Anne Ristie

nice! time to check out the crappy magazine section in the supermarket and write down a few addresses .. tina, margriet, libelle, vriendin and uhh, oh there are a bunch of those new "spiritual" mags about stones yoga and reiki and shit, in fact i even saw a magazine about wicca for kidz, but that might have been a one-off issue of some sort of other thing.

and, "gedraagt" tsk tsk, :roll: ;-)

pfff you suck as a critic you missed 'neits'

besides i almost failed dutch in highschool (got a 5).

We should try to avoid sending copies of the same letter to the same magazine, we wan to instill the idea of a new cult growing and seeing the same letter 20 times looks more like a prank.

Any Germans around here? If someone translates this and gives me addresses, I'll do the rest. :\

BUMP

because I thought this was a GREAT idea

Golden Applesauce, as the creator, you should set up some distribution material. Explain the project and it's goal, and then pick a date for the flood. Then we can blast it out into Discordian space to let people know what the deal is.

Yeah, this was pretty fucking brilliant.

I would suggest writing one of these to every advice columnist on the planet, though, not just Abby.

While it would probably be true, I don't think "Laughs at jokes I don't get" makes discordianism sound much like a cult.  To me it rings the "Someone is laughing at this right now bell pretty loudly.  Perhaps there's a way of rephrasing it so that it's a little more ambiguous and could be taken as sinister or harmless, depending on who's doing the reading.

Changes in bold

Dear Abby,

I've tried  to be accepting of other people's religions, especially when it comes to my friends, but I think one of my closest friends (we'll call him "Bob") is going too far. He claims to be part of this group called Discordianism, which he says is 'a joke disguised as a religion and a religion disguised as a joke' or something like that. I think it's some kind of hippie cult.  Since he's joined this group, he's stopped acting like the "Bob" I used to know.  He talks a lot about government conspiracies, laughs a lot at things that aren't funny (like funerals), and just doesn't act like a normal person should.  I don't know what to do! He hasn't done anything harmful yet, but I think his mental health might be harmed if I don't get him out of this so-called "religion" which refuses to take anything seriously. 

What's even worse is that recently he's started trying to convert me and other people we both know to join his new cause.  While I know my friends are too sensible to join a cult, I'm worried that he'll find some people who aren't, and will get them in on the act.  From what I've read in their holy book, the Principles of Chaos, the more of this cult there is, the more unstable they'll be.

How can I make my fears known to "Bob" without offending him and ruining our friendship?  I don't want him to hate me, but I don't want him to become part of some crazy cult, either!

Yours,
NORMAL from NORMAL, IL

Changed the name of the PD to its rough english meaning, since it's unlikely someone who is arguably afraid of us would know so much about us.  Also split it into 3 paragraphs and added some on, as well as a more detailed question than "Help!" and generally chopped some bits up and spat them out again in a different form.

As an aside, I will laugh some more if "Abby" uses google to check up on information and finds this page.

Can't directly find this page through google, only reg'd members can see it.

Spoilsport.  :sad:

Yeah, sorry for letting this one die.  Wanna shoot for June 12th?

I'll write up (another) sample letter and general guidelines for letterwriting.

do you know anything about wikicode? If you feel up to laying down some preliminary stuff on the BIP wiki, I'll gladly hook you up with an account.

I know very little about wikicode, but I could probably learn very quickly.

One thing to know is that you don't need (or want) to try to mimic the "voice" of letters that are published, because they're all rewritten anyway... that's why they all "sound" the same. Writing in the "Dear Abby" voice might tend to get your letter discounted as a fake... instead, try writing a letter in your own voice, or in the voice of an imaginary friend, like Big Lita:

Dear Abby,

I'm worried about my son. He just turned 17 and is into the internet and has a lot of friends who are into the internet also. Lately he's been reading a lot of books that raise red flags for me like some books by the Satanist author Robert Anton Wilson and others. He use to be a really good kid but now he is lacking the respect he use to have for the school, the authorieties, and including us, and has some kind of smart comment for every time we try to have a normal conversation. He has stopped going to Church with us and has gotten involed with some kind of "religion" called "discordia". I guess he found it on the internet and a lot of his friends are involved in it to. It gets more disturbing Abby, this "religion" which really I think I'd rather call a cult is a complete fake, theres a book for it that was written in the sixties and I read parts of it and it sounds like a bunch of drugged-out hippys to me. But my main concern is that this book and the other members of the cult promote a lack of respect for "everything". They don't take anything seriously, and my son is starting to be warped by this mindset, he even laughs at bad news on the TV sometimes and I'm afraid it's stealing his humanity away as well as his soul. I cant find very much information about "discordia", but I was hoping you could help point me in the right direction for getting help for my son and also warn your readers about the dangers of cults, even ones that are desguised as jokes!

Thank you and God bless,

Lita Alba, Salt Lake City

aww, and I prided myself on the ability to mimic weird voice's like Abby's.  That does make a lot more sense; I was always confused as too how all of these people (many of whom were not that bright given the problems they had) were all able to write in such a consistent hand.

AND I REELLY REELLY WILL FOR REEL WRITE THIS LETTER SOON

I wonder if there's some magical technological way to collect lots of advice column addresses with little effort / fairy dust.

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 14, 2008, 04:11:27 AM
I wonder if there's some magical technological way to collect lots of advice column addresses with little effort / fairy dust.

I don't know, but in searching turned up this hilarious article:

http://www.worldnetdaily.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=56491

Quote"At times Abby appears to condone adultery, even homosexual adultery," the report said. "'Confused in Illinois' wrote Abby that she had no interest in intimate relations with her husband, but she is now involved in a 'passionate sexual relationship' with a female friend. Abby told her to 'look at the bright side. At least you now finally understand what has been missing...'"

Dear god.  Abby you SLUT!  :argh!:

Idea:

We should put some publicity up about "Discordian Rallies" of some sort. That way our letters can be centered around the horrible unlawful, sinful, bizarre, believable things which happen at Discordian gatherings. "Dear Abby: last weekend my son went to this Discordian rally thing, an he came back with a tattoo the word "Spag" tattooed on his neck!" Everyone can adlib what happened.

The real interesting thing is going to be that if tons of newspapers cover this thing within a short amount of time, news may emerge on the phenomenon itself. This sort of meta-news will cause reporters to write rather frankly about Discord, raising awareness, etc etc.



To Do:

• Collect addresses of the ten most popular advice columns.


• Write up a page on the wiki about AbbyGASM. Explain what it is, how it works, and how to get involved. Make sure the "buzz week" date is posted loud and clear.


• Push links to this project ALL OVER THE WEB. Hit 23ae, facebook, myspace, lj, poee, eb&G, irreality, ANYWHERE where Discordians hang out.


• During buzz week, and for a week or two afterwards, we'll hide the wiki page, so that advice columnists doing background research on this thing won't see the project and spoil the prank.


• Collect any buzz that comes up, and post it to the wiki

Volunteers?

Yes!, tonight, will be on full in about 5 hours

I'm in for writing letters and spreading the word.

Sounds like a more fun version of "Wag the Dog."

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 21, 2008, 03:46:30 PM

To Do:

• Collect addresses of the ten most popular advice columns.

Amy Dickson:  askamy@tribune.com
Dear Abby: http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/dearabby_form.html
Cheryl Lavin: cheryllavin@aol.com
Carolyn Hax: tellme@washpost.com
Since You Asked (Salon): advice@salon.com
Advice Goddess:  adviceamy@aol.com
Savage Love: mail@savagelove.net
Billy Graham: "My Answer," c/o Billy Graham, Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, 1 Billy Graham Parkway, Charlotte, N.C., 28201  (can't find e-mail)
Miss Manners, c/o the Chicago Tribune, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611


We could try to hit up a few college newspaper advice columns too.

I thought Billy Graham was dead.  Guess not.

Quote from: IasonOuabache on April 22, 2008, 12:01:08 AM

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 21, 2008, 03:46:30 PM

To Do:

• Collect addresses of the ten most popular advice columns.

Amy Dickson:  askamy@tribune.com
Dear Abby: http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/dearabby_form.html
Cheryl Lavin: cheryllavin@aol.com
Carolyn Hax: tellme@washpost.com
Since You Asked (Salon): advice@salon.com
Advice Goddess:  adviceamy@aol.com
Savage Love: mail@savagelove.net
Billy Graham: "My Answer," c/o Billy Graham, Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, 1 Billy Graham Parkway, Charlotte, N.C., 28201  (can't find e-mail)
Miss Manners, c/o the Chicago Tribune, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611


We could try to hit up a few college newspaper advice columns too.

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRG!   :lulz:

Quote from: TheStripèdOne on April 22, 2008, 01:03:36 AM
I thought Billy Graham was dead.  Guess not.

I'm honestly surprised that he outlived Falwell.  I bet that he isn't actually doing any work now since he is 90 fuckin' years old.  He's just a figurehead and has been for years.

I'm able to write some letters, and I think I can find a few other people who'd be willing to help with this.

1rd - i think suspicion would be raised if they received more than one letter about the same thing (then again, maybe not . . . hard to say i guess)

2st - i always figured the "reader submitted" letters were made up.  or at least synthesized out of many letters of similar ilk. 

3nd - i like numbering things this way.

I think the idea is actually to each send just one letter to one column.

Yeah, that's the plan. Iason collected the top ten so somebody could mail them, but not all of us.

Well, in that case, I'm probably not the best for that, since I'm in a sort of remote place at the moment.

Is there something else I could do?

Yes, definitely... Once we're set up, write to as many different possible advice columns as you can.

We'll want to focus these efforts into one week of time, so if our letters appear in advice-columns, they appear everywhere at once.

where you at, Priz?



We should also come up with a webpage for a sort of fictional "Discordian Devival" which looks like it might be happening in [any given] town. Sex, Drugs, Rock & Roll. "Contact your local Cabalmeister for details".

For buzz week, how does June 8th - 14th work?  That gives us about a month to get this together and also it is the week before my birthday.

---

AbbyGASM

   AbbyGASM is a [[Golden Apple Seed Mission]], named after the famous advice column Dear Abby.  The mission is pretty simple:  on the week of June 8th – 14th, everyone writes letters to different advice columnists on the subject of Discordianism.  Maybe you're concerned about your friend, who recently joined this crazy cult where people laugh at authorities, look for the humor in tragedies, and generally refuse to take life with the seriousness it deserves.  Maybe you're worried that your impressionable teenagers are planning to attend the upcoming [[Discordian Devival]].  Be creative.

While one of the projected effects of AbbyGASM is certainly publicity for Discordianism, the five main goals are:

1.)  Prank the media.  Let's face it, if anybody deserves to be taken less seriously, it's these guys.
3-4.)  Have fun.
5.)  Mess with all the Jack Chick types by providing them with a manufactured crisis.

Victory will be declared if a major advice columnists prints one of the letters (or a synthesis of the many letters he/she will receive,) we get media coverage of the Discordian Devival, or a popular evangelist gives a "hide the children" sermon/tract that features us.

Amy Dickson:  askamy@tribune.com
Dear Abby: http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/dearabby_form.html
Cheryl Lavin: cheryllavin@aol.com
Carolyn Hax: tellme@washpost.com
Since You Asked (Salon): advice@salon.com
Advice Goddess:  adviceamy@aol.com
Savage Love: mail@savagelove.net
Billy Graham: "My Answer," c/o Billy Graham, Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, 1 Billy    Graham Parkway, Charlotte, N.C., 28201  (can't find e-mail)
Miss Manners, c/o the Chicago Tribune, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611
Jack Chick:  Chick Publications, P.O. Box 3500, Ontario, Calif., 91761-1019
Yahoo! Answers: www.yahoo.com/r/4d

This is not infeasible.  We already have Stephen Colbert in our pockets.

:mittens:

 :mittens: indeed!

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 23, 2008, 03:24:09 PM

where you at, Priz?

I alternate between Northern Canada and Kauai, but I travel quite a bit besides that.

also I think Savage Love is a sex advice column?

Hmm, if enough people get involved it might make sense to have several different letters sent to each over a longer period of time to make sure they think this is an up-and-coming crisis. Otherwise, as far as each columnist knows, it's just an isolated case, and thus also less credible.
Alternatively, we could have no buzzweek, instead spreading the letters over a longer period of time, so the columnists might see our letters in other columns before they get letters themselves, which will make them think this is a broader phenomenon.

To me, that makes more sense, though we could all have a common "date for something big to happen" or something similar in all our letters.

My understanding was that everyone involved would write their own letter to each targeted columnist, over the relatively short time period, like a week or two.  I can see the benefits of a little bleeding either before or after the buzz week...  I don't know, never planned any of these media blitzes before.

Remember most people are simply too lazy to write their own letter. You can't count on it. We need to produce several sample letters for people to use, if we want each column to receive more than one letter.
But here's an idea: what if we decide on a date for our Devival, put up a website about it, link to it from anywhere we can to make it look authentic (and to get it a good rating on google), then have a slow trickle of letters alarmed about friends and loved ones planning to go to this terrible debauch. If we time things right, we can create enough alarm *before* D-Day that this actually hits the media.
(I can help in writing letters and site content, but I won't be able to mail anything myself, I live in Europe.)

I can churn out a few sample letters.

excellent!

Let me remind people what the Best Case Scenario is...


1. As many participants as possible write ONE letter to each advice columnist they can find. (NOT multiple letters to the same person! That is counterproductive!)

2. In a short amount of time, dozens of advice columns print letters either (a) telling parents to reign their kids in and keep them away from Discordia (b) telling parents what Discordia really is and advising they loosen up a little (c) telling parents what Discordia really is and advising them to KEEP THEIR KIDS AWAY FROM IT

3. Somebody in The Press realizes that all sorts of advice columns are being writing about Discordia and does an article on it.





Nigel, some sample letters would be wonderful.


Does anybody need a wiki account to paste this stuff onto it?

Cool... someone please feel free to use the one I wrote earlier, I'll write a new one for myself.

Dear advice columnist,

I am a 33 year old gay man in a relationship with a younger man... he's 24. We've been seeing each other for about eight months, and one of the things I've always liked about him is that he's very spontaneous and kind of "out there" in terms of his sense of humor and philosophy; he's really delightful to be around and is always coming up with the most fascinating things to talk about - life with him is never boring! However, in the last couple of weeks he's started talking about a religion called "Discordia", and is making plans to attend some kind of festival or gathering that is put on by the Discordia organization. At first it sounded a little bit like Burning Man or a Rainbow gathering, both of which I'm familiar with, but the more he talks about it the stranger and creepier it's starting to sound, and I'm wondering now if he's gotten himself involved with something darker than it originally seemed to be. I'm not sheltered per se, but I am a moderate Christian and I haven't had a lot of exposure to the occult... but that's what this is reminding me of. I haven't been able to find out anything about this Discordia organization at the library, and I'm wondering if you can tell me what this is, whether I should be concerned for my boyfriend, and if it's something I should confront him about, or if it's harmless and I can chalk it up to another of his normal hi-jinks.

that's excellent

Dear advice columnist,

I am the stepmother and mother to two girls, aged 17 and 12 respectively. I married my husband when my stepdaughter was only 3, and we have always been very close; I think of her as my own child, and she and my birth-daughter are inseparable despite the age difference. We have raised our girls to be independent, strong children who can think for themselves and who have a strong foundation in family. We aren't churchgoers, but we have raised our girls to be both moral and ethical, and warned them about the dangers of getting involved with kids who are "rebelling" against something. Our philosophy has always been that if we provide them with trust, guidance, and our open minds, they will have no reason to rebel, and so far it seems to have worked wonderfully; they come to us when they have questions or issues, instead of going to other kids for answers.

Last year, high-speed internet finally became available in our somewhat rural area, so we bought a new computer for Christmas and had the internet installed at our home. It's been wonderful for researching homework and for allowing the girls to keep up with their friends who live too far away for them to visit regularly, and they seem to enjoy it tremendously. My concern is that they have, perhaps against my better judgement, set up accounts on Myspace, and through their friends there, have found a group called "The Dynamic Legion of Discord" on Myspace. Normally I really trust my girls' judgement on clubs and groups they want to participate in, but in this case I really don't know what to think. Everything I've found on the World Wide Web has been, honestly, indecipherable nonsense, and when I ask the girls about it they laugh and tell me it's a joke. They're talking to me and their father less lately, and spend an awful lot of time holed up in their room laughing... and when I ask them to explain the joke, nothing they say makes any sense.

Even this wouldn't concern me so much, but my stepdaughter has asked permission to travel to some group meeting, and when I told her that I couldn't allow her to go unchaperoned, she said "Well I'll be 18 by then, and if you won't help me I'll do it on my own". I'm scared... I don't know these people, I don't understand what they're about, and now I feel like I'm losing my daughter to them. My younger girl is now mad at me and her father, and they're spending more and more time talking about things that just don't seem to make sense. If there is anything you can tell me that will help me understand what my girls are dealing with, I would be very grateful!

-A Concerned Mom

you've really got that "speaking as a mother" voice down pat

Awesome. Enviable writing there, Nigel.

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 25, 2008, 12:47:38 AM
you've really got that "speaking as a mother" voice down pat

It's my specialty. :lulz:

I like them both, but I don't think I've ever seen a letter printed in a "Dear Abby" that was overtly pro-gay or from a gay person. Not saying it hasn't happened, but I've never seen one.

They're not all being sent to "Dear Abby".

I meant advice columns in general, but as I said, just cause I haven't seen it doesn't mean it hasn't ever happened.

Either way, I didn't mean to sound critical or anything, they are both excellently written. :D

Well, there is, you know, "Savage Love".

Yeah, I thought pretty hard about how to write something for Savage Love and just drew a whole revolver full of blanks.

I had an idea using something about fisting and apples, but decided it sounded too improbable.

Here's my go, let me know what you think:

Dear Abby,

I'm afraid my sixteen-year-old daughter has started to hang out with the wrong crowd at school.  She was "going steady" with a nice boy for almost a year, but now she's been going out on dates with older boys, sometimes with two or three at a time!  She often seems depressed or moody at home, only looking happy (too happy!) after a night with these boys.  She's started wearing a yin-yang symbol (from Chinese religion) around her neck instead of the cross she's worn since confirmation.  I'm afraid these boys may be trying to recruit her into some sort of pagan cult or new-age religion.  One day she got a letter from "Howard" saying nothing but "August 23: immanentize the eschaton".  What does this mean?  What should I do?

- Concerned Parent

slightly too obscure reference to discordia there. unless they get a bunch of other letters explicitly referencing discordia AND the columnists put research into discordianism, they're going to for the yin-yang thing because they know that and keep it general.

Yeah, there is a tricky tradeoff between under-the-radar and ludicrous. What if I change "Howard" to "The Discordian Society" or somesuch?

Well, you can't expect the columnist/staff to figure out obscure references. If you want them to talk about how to deal with a dangerous cult like Discordianism, you have to spell it out for them. You have to actually say, "my loved one is a Discordianist doing scary things and I'm scared". The point here isn't to get amusing things printed, it's to get real buzz going. And buzz has to be comprehensible to people not in the know.

IMHO, if this is an orchestrated campaign, it needs to have a good mix of letters in the range between paranoid-frightening and concerned-subtle.  If "Dear Abby" gets 50 letters and they're *all* over the top, it just screams "prank", and all the letters will be fast-tracked to the wastebasket.

On the other hand, if the consensus is that *all* the letters need to be over the top... we'll trash this one and I'll write some more.

Again, we're* not each sending a letter to each and every one of the columns - each column will, at first, receive just one letter. The goal is not to make the columnists think this is a major thing going on, it's to leverage the columns to make other people thing something major is going on. And for that we need to make sure our fake crisis is visible in as many columns as possible.

*Those of you in the US, that is. So not I. :(

I've created a basic wiki page (http://blackironprison.com/index.php/AbbyGASM) for AbbyGASM. It occurred to me while writing this that the fake Devival should be a GASM of its own (because it can be leveraged for other projects as well) so I've made a red link to a DevivalGASM page. Someone will have to decide to actually do the whole fake Devival thing for it to happen.

Dear Advice Columnist,

Me and my best friend Josh have known each other for practically ever... we even went to first grade in the same class. We always have spent almost every weekend together and sometimes we go on vacations and camping with each others families. We are both juniors at Lincoln High, and we are planning to start applying to the same colleges soon so we can go to college together. He is pretty much the person I am closest to in the whole world besides my sister and my mom... we tell each other EVERYTHING. About six months ago Josh started talking about this book he read, called the Principia Discordia. It was pretty cool and he got me to read it, but I guess I didn't think it was as deep or whatever as he did... it's mostly just a bunch of goofy stuff written a long time ago, like when our parents were kids. Anyway, after a couple of months of trying to talk to me about it, he said that he found some other people who are really into it online... The Discordian Society or something like that... and now he says his religion is Discordian and he's going to this thing called the Devival, which is a big festival where they all get together and, I guess, worship.

Here's the thing that I'm really having a problem with, though, is that because I'm not into the Discordian Society, this is the first time Josh has ever gotten all excited about doing something WITHOUT me. I feel so left out, and he doesn't seem to get it. I thought we were best friends, and it's like he's forgotten all about it. My mom says that when people grow up sometimes they can grow apart, and nobody seems at all concerned about what he's doing, but honestly it's WIERD. It's not AT ALL like the old Josh, and not like the stuff we used to do together. He's not even excited about looking at college brochures anymore, and he talks about doing things that sound, well maybe not illegal, but definitely things that sound like trouble, I can't really go into details because he doesn't talk about it to me very much anymore. Please help! Nobody will listen to me! All the adults I know just tell me not to worry or they say that I'll get over it, but I am not the one who needs to get over anything! I just want my old best friend back. :(

Sincerly,

Becky Strodtmeyer

I was thinking that an awesome way to handle the Devival page would be to make a fake front page with a welcome paragraph saying something like:

Welcome to Devival 2008! Word is spreading, and this year's Devival promises to be the biggest, best, and most debased in Discordian history. If you have found this page, most likely it is because someone sent you the invitation; please enter the password below.

If you do not have the password, you must have found this page by accident; if you would like to know more about Devival and possibly join in our revelry, please seek out your local members of the Discordian Society for debriefing.

Then there can be a password box that always tells you you've entered the wrong password.

:mittens: and :mittens:
great letter, and a great idea.
is any of our interweb wizards around and willing to do that?

sure, how's this look::

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/devival2008

(you better tell me it's awesome, cause i spent way too long on it)

THAT'S.
FUCKING.
AWESOME.

aww you're just saying that ..

i almost wish it was a real party, now.

Total pwnage.

Hmm, should we actually have a DevivalGASM page on the wiki, or should we avoid mentioning that it's a hoax?

Quote from: Verbatim on April 29, 2008, 05:36:33 PM
Hmm, should we actually have a DevivalGASM page on the wiki, or should we avoid mentioning that it's a hoax?

avoid mentioning, i'd say. i'm not sure but i think the wiki could show up on a google search.

dang, already mentioned it in the abbygasm page. any way to obliviate the wiki as to past versions?

Oh wait lol if they find the AbbyGASM page we're busted anyhoo.

Hmm, shouldn't the Devival page also request an email address, so it's more credible? It needn't save the address or anything, just having another box would make the whole thing look real.

The devival page is fine. It's not really supposed to have any info other than
-Discordians party in DEPRAVED ways which mothers don't approve of
-the gathering is happening everywhere, possibly in YOUR town.

We can list it on the wiki, because we'll be hiding that wiki page during buzz week.


Current sections on the wiki
Goal
Method and Scope
How do I Get Involved




Sections I suggest for the wiki:
-Under Method and Scope, C&P some of the relevant bits from this thread which explain how to do it. Also add the section from my post about how if we all send in stuff at the same time, new news might emerge about AbbyGASM

-Add a subsection explaining that Everyone should write to their local papers about this. They can use a sample letter, or come up with their own. Remember that they are not writing AS Discordians, but rather as citizens who are concerned ABOUT Discordia. Make it BELIEVABLE -- it's totally believable that we're an orgiastic cult. But we don't sail around the ocean in a big yellow submarine.

-Add a "Sample Letters" section, with all the letters people have submitted.

-Under How Do I Get Involved, announce Buzz Week.

-Add a link to the Devival 2008 page. Instruct people how to use it as a tool to make your letters more believable. (say you found it in your kid's search history, for example)

-Also add an image of some sort to the wiki.


Other Stuff
-tag the wiki page and the thread on del.icio.us with the tags "AbbyGASM, OMGASM"

-distribute the address to the wiki to all sorts of web communities. During buzz week, we'll pull it down.




Great work guys! I'm real excited to see people working on the wiki. (Mittens, verb!) There's only a few more things we need to do (del.icio.us tagging for example) to springboard this into a full-blown GASM.

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 29, 2008, 06:52:22 PM
-Add a subsection explaining that Everyone should write to their local papers about this. They can use a sample letter, or come up with their own. Remember that they are not writing AS Discordians, but rather as citizens who are concerned ABOUT Discordia. Make it BELIEVABLE -- it's totally believable that we're an orgiastic cult. But we don't sail around the ocean in a big yellow submarine.

:fuckmittens: FUCK YOU CRAM I RENTED OUT PEARL HARBOR JUST FOR YOU GUYS

THE WHOLE FUCKING HARBOR!

I'm going to promote the devival on my blog, once this Hoffman business clears up.

I suggest someone do a Verwirrung entry on it as well.

ok, I've added five sample letters (Nigel's four and the one Cainad started in the beginning). there was another one about a page back but I find it too nuanced for this mission.

Brilliant stuff, this.

Just one nitpicky thing:

Quote from: internetif you would like to know more about Devival and possibly join in our revelry, please seek out your local members of the Discordian Society for debriefing.

Shouldn't it be "briefing"?

Quote from: triple zero on April 29, 2008, 03:58:43 PMsure, how's this look::

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/devival2008

(you better tell me it's awesome, cause i spent way too long on it)

i love how there's already been three people on the chat asking for the password :lol:

Quote from: TheStripèdOne on April 29, 2008, 09:00:41 PM
Brilliant stuff, this.

Just one nitpicky thing:

Quote from: internetif you would like to know more about Devival and possibly join in our revelry, please seek out your local members of the Discordian Society for debriefing.

Shouldn't it be "briefing"?

No.

:lulz:

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source - Share This
de·brief    Audio Help   /diˈbrif/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[dee-breef] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–verb (used with object)
1.   to interrogate (a soldier, astronaut, diplomat, etc.) on return from a mission in order to assess the conduct and results of the mission.
2.   to question formally and systematically in order to obtain useful intelligence or information: Political and economic experts routinely debrief important defectors about conditions in their home country.
3.   to subject to prohibitions against revealing or discussing classified information, as upon separation from a position of military or political sensitivity.
4.   Psychology. (after an experiment) to disclose to the subject the purpose of the experiment and any reasons for deception or manipulation.

Quote from: triple zero on April 29, 2008, 04:17:31 PM
aww you're just saying that ..

i almost wish it was a real party, now.

This is obviously part 2 of DevivalGASM.  :D

Quote from: IasonOuabache on April 29, 2008, 10:04:00 PM

Quote from: triple zero on April 29, 2008, 04:17:31 PM
aww you're just saying that ..

i almost wish it was a real party, now.

This is obviously part 2 of DevivalGASM.  :D

best case scenario

after this project concludes, people start showing up and saying "Hey I'm in NYC. Where the party at?"

and I say, "you got twenty bucks? Lemme just rent out this here warehouse for the evening and we'll get our fnord on..."

I'd come to that!

Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2008, 10:03:27 PM

Quote
Shouldn't it be "briefing"?

No.

:lulz:

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source - Share This
de·brief    Audio Help   /diˈbrif/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[dee-breef] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–verb (used with object)
1.   to interrogate (a soldier, astronaut, diplomat, etc.) on return from a mission in order to assess the conduct and results of the mission.
2.   to question formally and systematically in order to obtain useful intelligence or information: Political and economic experts routinely debrief important defectors about conditions in their home country.
3.   to subject to prohibitions against revealing or discussing classified information, as upon separation from a position of military or political sensitivity.
4.   Psychology. (after an experiment) to disclose to the subject the purpose of the experiment and any reasons for deception or manipulation.

I see.  I always think of this as an "after something has already happened" word, in contrast with briefing's "before something has happened" vibe.

And in fact, according to the OED:
"debrief - trans. To obtain information from (a person) on the completion of a mission or after a journey. Usu. pass. So debriefing vbl. n."

"briefing -  2. The action of giving information or instructions relating to a particular situation; information of this kind. Also attrib. "

So there!  &c.  And yes, I realise it doesn't matter and nobody cares.

_{(Mmmm, OED)}

Quote from: TheStripèdOne on April 30, 2008, 12:57:47 AM

I see.  I always think of this as an "after something has already happened" word, in contrast with briefing's "before something has happened" vibe.

HELLO, THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT FUNNY.

ITT Nigel showing off her lexicographer's humor.

And lol, it's like being asked to go to your local Discordian Society to have your briefs taken off.

I admit it. I am a total dork.

and here I thought it was a pun about taking off briefs.

(http://i209.photobucket.com/albums/bb163/wompcabal/crambodybuilder.jpg)

*wink*

That's going to be in my nightmares tonight. Thanks Cram.

OK, have we decided on a wording?  Because I'm still getting a flood of people coming in due to my early reporting of Hofmann's death, and chances are these are the sort of people who would be interested in a debauched Discordian Devival.

Just give me the word and I'll put it up on my blog for all to see.

Wording for what? Tell me what you want, I'll give a shot at writing it.

Promoting the Devival.  I can put up the link and some text whenever.

Maybe you should link to the page 000 made?

Quote from: Nigel on April 30, 2008, 09:25:49 PM
Maybe you should link to the page 000 made?

i think that was the point. he'd blog some text for devival 2008 and link to that page.

it'd probably mention something about the password and "seek out your local members of the Discordian Society for debriefing."

i think that would be funny either way, because with a bit of luck we'll get a load of people on the forum asking about the password. any idea how we're going to handle them?
at first i would say, find out if they're "genuine" discordians that can KTFMS, if they are, PM them with the "in" joke. if they are not, just let them dangle a bit (even though they might find this thread)

in other news, i tagged the sample letters on del.icio.us, so that there will soon be some content up at the GASMfeed (click my sig) for AbbyGASM

Is there a date for D-day/Buzz-week yet?

No, right now we're all such huge lazy asses we prefer to go watching wrestling on TV or something while eating jumbo bags of corn chips rather than make AbbyGASM happen.

oh.. sounds fair..  :lulz:
but set a date and all those halfwritten letters might complete themselfs, hide in a envelope, find a stamp that want to join up, walk to the mailbox and take a trip..

OR everyone can lick a Stamp, take that Trip and imagine it   :D

NO YUO

If this GASM is still a go (and I hope it is, because I bought stamps), here's an alternate spin along the lines of ZOMG DEY R IN TEH SKOOLZ THINKZ UV DA CHILDRENZ!!1!:



Dear Advice Columnist:

I am in the eighth grade. I am not very popular. We have a new substitute teacher, and she is realy nice and cool and does not let the other kids pick on me or make fun of my clothes. And she said she is a Discordian, so people like that do not bother her. That they are a joke. I do not know what Discordian is? She says it is a religion. There is a devival for this religion and she is going and she said I could go too if I want but my parents wont let me cause they say it is no real religion.

Anyway I really want to go if it means I dont care about people laughing at me anymore and is it a real religion?

Thank you,
Jess



Just one mention that these depraved Discordians are in our schools, and we're in like Flynn, methinks. Or is that too sinister?

I think that works well.  Mainly because few people suspect children of trickery either (remember the psychologist who wrote all those letters to mass-murderers and politicians).

Quote from: Cain on May 28, 2008, 06:24:00 PM
...[F]ew people suspect children of trickery either (remember the psychologist who wrote all those letters to mass-murderers and politicians).

Unfortunately, I don't remember, and it sounds right up my alley. D'you happen to have said psychologist's name floating about? I'm a big girl, so I'm happy to do my own research from there, but a trail of bread crumbs would be greatly appreciated.

Oh my mistake, he wasn't a scientist, he was a pop-culture historian.  Name of Bill Geerhart.

Very good spin there, Ugolino.

Geerhart is golden! The article in Radar Magazine reprints copies of some of the responses he received, including two from Charles Manson. News Flash: Crazy Serial Killer Is Crazy.

Said article can be found at hxxp://radaronline.com/from-the-magazine/2008/04/letter_to_charles_manson_richard_ramirez_ted_kacyinski_bill.php

Why did you hxxp that?

Bump for buzz week.

I'll be mailing out letters, although probably not to Strange Love.

Buzz Week, how'd it work out?

Being on the other side of the planet I can't really tell.

Worth attempting in Australia and other places?

Worth attempting? OF COURSE!

Oops. I missed this one. Did anybody mail anything? Anybody see any results?

If we all missed it, we should do it again.

Quote from: rhys_rhaven on September 22, 2008, 04:50:30 AM
i found out about discordians through a friend I met over the summer. he seemed kinda off balance, and his girlfriend reminded me of a charlie manson follower. they were really nice though, so i thought id check it out. reading through your posts, its so obvious that what you call "eris" is just another name for satan. everything you guy support is just evil and wicked. do you know you are actively following satan or are you all misled? (as he is the great Deciever).

someone said in the tread about "definitions" that discordianism is trying to destroy america and everything it stands for. how can you say things like this and still think you are good? do you not think you are good? i just wanted to tell you all that God loves each and every one of you, and that no matter what you think now there is always a place for you in his Good Book.

Yes, I am a Christian.

GodBless,
Rhys

Convenient and brilliant!

Quote from: rhys_rhaven on September 22, 2008, 04:50:30 AM
I found out about Discordians through a friend I met over the summer. he seemed off balance, and his girlfriend reminded me of a Charlie Manson follower. They were really nice though, so I thought I'd check it out. Reading through some of their online discussion boards, its so obvious that the "goddess" they worship called "Eris" is just another name for Satan. everything they support is just evil and wicked. Do they know they are actively following Satan or are they all misled? (as he is The Great Deceiver).

Someone said in a discussion about the definitions of Discordia said that Discordianism is trying to destroy America and everything it stands for. How can these people say things like this and still think they are good? Do you not think you are good? I just hope these deluded people all realize that God loves each and every one of them, and that no matter what you think now there is always a place for you in his Good Book.

GodBless,
A concerned Christian, Rhys

Fixed for immediate posting.

Bump. I'm really curious about how it went since there are no posts about that.

to my knowledge, I don't think anybody did anything.

If anyone cares to, the next step is to re-summarize the project and draw up a plan of action

The Summary
Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to join in on the Golden Apple Corps' latest plan for seeding chaos, AbbyGASM.

The objective: to send emails during the week of March 7th - March 13th to popular advice columns claiming to be from concerned parents, friends (etc) asking for help in dealing with a situation involving a loved one who has recently been pulled into the cult commonly referred to as Discordianism. Ideally, the letters will all mention a recent Discordian gathering, "Devival 2010".  Victory will be declared if (a) one of the columns actually prints one of our letters (b) the media does a story on "Devival 2010" or Discordianism in general or (c) a major televangelist delivers a sermon/produces a tract about Discordianism.

The Plan of Action

Quote from: Iason Ouabache on April 22, 2008, 12:01:08 AM

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 21, 2008, 03:46:30 PM

To Do:

• Collect addresses of the ten most popular advice columns.

Amy Dickson:  askamy@tribune.com
Dear Abby: http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/dearabby_form.html
Cheryl Lavin: cheryllavin@aol.com
Carolyn Hax: tellme@washpost.com
Since You Asked (Salon): advice@salon.com
Advice Goddess:  adviceamy@aol.com
Savage Love: mail@savagelove.net
Billy Graham: "My Answer," c/o Billy Graham, Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, 1 Billy Graham Parkway, Charlotte, N.C., 28201  (can't find e-mail)
Miss Manners, c/o the Chicago Tribune, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611

We could try to hit up a few college newspaper advice columns too.

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 21, 2008, 03:46:30 PM

To Do:

• Write up a page on the wiki about AbbyGASM. Explain what it is, how it works, and how to get involved. Make sure the "buzz week" date is posted loud and clear.
• Push links to this project ALL OVER THE WEB. Hit 23ae, facebook, myspace, lj, poee, eb&G, irreality, ANYWHERE where Discordians hang out.


• During buzz week, and for a week or two afterwards, we'll hide the wiki page, so that advice columnists doing background research on this thing won't see the project and spoil the prank.


• Collect any buzz that comes up, and post it to the wiki

If no one has any problems with the proposed buzz week (March 11-17) then I'll post this on the wiki page. And I'll canvas all the Discordian groups on facebook as well. Also, we need to figure out whether or not we're going to make a site for the Devival.

For your convenience here are some sample letters, written by Nigel and the Contessa.

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on April 10, 2008, 11:58:01 PM
One thing to know is that you don't need (or want) to try to mimic the "voice" of letters that are published, because they're all rewritten anyway... that's why they all "sound" the same. Writing in the "Dear Abby" voice might tend to get your letter discounted as a fake... instead, try writing a letter in your own voice, or in the voice of an imaginary friend, like Big Lita:

Dear Abby,

I'm worried about my son. He just turned 17 and is into the internet and has a lot of friends who are into the internet also. Lately he's been reading a lot of books that raise red flags for me like some books by the Satanist author Robert Anton Wilson and others. He use to be a really good kid but now he is lacking the respect he use to have for the school, the authorieties, and including us, and has some kind of smart comment for every time we try to have a normal conversation. He has stopped going to Church with us and has gotten involed with some kind of "religion" called "discordia". I guess he found it on the internet and a lot of his friends are involved in it to. It gets more disturbing Abby, this "religion" which really I think I'd rather call a cult is a complete fake, theres a book for it that was written in the sixties and I read parts of it and it sounds like a bunch of drugged-out hippys to me. But my main concern is that this book and the other members of the cult promote a lack of respect for "everything". They don't take anything seriously, and my son is starting to be warped by this mindset, he even laughs at bad news on the TV sometimes and I'm afraid it's stealing his humanity away as well as his soul. I cant find very much information about "discordia", but I was hoping you could help point me in the right direction for getting help for my son and also warn your readers about the dangers of cults, even ones that are desguised as jokes!

Thank you and God bless,

Lita Alba, Salt Lake City

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on April 24, 2008, 10:43:30 PM
Cool... someone please feel free to use the one I wrote earlier, I'll write a new one for myself.

Dear advice columnist,

I am a 33 year old gay man in a relationship with a younger man... he's 24. We've been seeing each other for about eight months, and one of the things I've always liked about him is that he's very spontaneous and kind of "out there" in terms of his sense of humor and philosophy; he's really delightful to be around and is always coming up with the most fascinating things to talk about - life with him is never boring! However, in the last couple of weeks he's started talking about a religion called "Discordia", and is making plans to attend some kind of festival or gathering that is put on by the Discordia organization. At first it sounded a little bit like Burning Man or a Rainbow gathering, both of which I'm familiar with, but the more he talks about it the stranger and creepier it's starting to sound, and I'm wondering now if he's gotten himself involved with something darker than it originally seemed to be. I'm not sheltered per se, but I am a moderate Christian and I haven't had a lot of exposure to the occult... but that's what this is reminding me of. I haven't been able to find out anything about this Discordia organization at the library, and I'm wondering if you can tell me what this is, whether I should be concerned for my boyfriend, and if it's something I should confront him about, or if it's harmless and I can chalk it up to another of his normal hi-jinks.

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on April 24, 2008, 11:52:28 PM
Dear advice columnist,

I am the stepmother and mother to two girls, aged 17 and 12 respectively. I married my husband when my stepdaughter was only 3, and we have always been very close; I think of her as my own child, and she and my birth-daughter are inseparable despite the age difference. We have raised our girls to be independent, strong children who can think for themselves and who have a strong foundation in family. We aren't churchgoers, but we have raised our girls to be both moral and ethical, and warned them about the dangers of getting involved with kids who are "rebelling" against something. Our philosophy has always been that if we provide them with trust, guidance, and our open minds, they will have no reason to rebel, and so far it seems to have worked wonderfully; they come to us when they have questions or issues, instead of going to other kids for answers.

Last year, high-speed internet finally became available in our somewhat rural area, so we bought a new computer for Christmas and had the internet installed at our home. It's been wonderful for researching homework and for allowing the girls to keep up with their friends who live too far away for them to visit regularly, and they seem to enjoy it tremendously. My concern is that they have, perhaps against my better judgement, set up accounts on Myspace, and through their friends there, have found a group called "The Dynamic Legion of Discord" on Myspace. Normally I really trust my girls' judgement on clubs and groups they want to participate in, but in this case I really don't know what to think. Everything I've found on the World Wide Web has been, honestly, indecipherable nonsense, and when I ask the girls about it they laugh and tell me it's a joke. They're talking to me and their father less lately, and spend an awful lot of time holed up in their room laughing... and when I ask them to explain the joke, nothing they say makes any sense.

Even this wouldn't concern me so much, but my stepdaughter has asked permission to travel to some group meeting, and when I told her that I couldn't allow her to go unchaperoned, she said "Well I'll be 18 by then, and if you won't help me I'll do it on my own". I'm scared... I don't know these people, I don't understand what they're about, and now I feel like I'm losing my daughter to them. My younger girl is now mad at me and her father, and they're spending more and more time talking about things that just don't seem to make sense. If there is anything you can tell me that will help me understand what my girls are dealing with, I would be very grateful!

-A Concerned Mom

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on April 29, 2008, 01:39:15 AM
Dear Advice Columnist,

Me and my best friend Josh have known each other for practically ever... we even went to first grade in the same class. We always have spent almost every weekend together and sometimes we go on vacations and camping with each others families. We are both juniors at Lincoln High, and we are planning to start applying to the same colleges soon so we can go to college together. He is pretty much the person I am closest to in the whole world besides my sister and my mom... we tell each other EVERYTHING. About six months ago Josh started talking about this book he read, called the Principia Discordia. It was pretty cool and he got me to read it, but I guess I didn't think it was as deep or whatever as he did... it's mostly just a bunch of goofy stuff written a long time ago, like when our parents were kids. Anyway, after a couple of months of trying to talk to me about it, he said that he found some other people who are really into it online... The Discordian Society or something like that... and now he says his religion is Discordian and he's going to this thing called the Devival, which is a big festival where they all get together and, I guess, worship.

Here's the thing that I'm really having a problem with, though, is that because I'm not into the Discordian Society, this is the first time Josh has ever gotten all excited about doing something WITHOUT me. I feel so left out, and he doesn't seem to get it. I thought we were best friends, and it's like he's forgotten all about it. My mom says that when people grow up sometimes they can grow apart, and nobody seems at all concerned about what he's doing, but honestly it's WIERD. It's not AT ALL like the old Josh, and not like the stuff we used to do together. He's not even excited about looking at college brochures anymore, and he talks about doing things that sound, well maybe not illegal, but definitely things that sound like trouble, I can't really go into details because he doesn't talk about it to me very much anymore. Please help! Nobody will listen to me! All the adults I know just tell me not to worry or they say that I'll get over it, but I am not the one who needs to get over anything! I just want my old best friend back. :(

Sincerly,

Becky Strodtmeyer

Quote from: Contessa_Ugolino on May 28, 2008, 06:14:01 PM
If this GASM is still a go (and I hope it is, because I bought stamps), here's an alternate spin along the lines of ZOMG DEY R IN TEH SKOOLZ THINKZ UV DA CHILDRENZ!!1!:



Dear Advice Columnist:

I am in the eighth grade. I am not very popular. We have a new substitute teacher, and she is realy nice and cool and does not let the other kids pick on me or make fun of my clothes. And she said she is a Discordian, so people like that do not bother her. That they are a joke. I do not know what Discordian is? She says it is a religion. There is a devival for this religion and she is going and she said I could go too if I want but my parents wont let me cause they say it is no real religion.

Anyway I really want to go if it means I dont care about people laughing at me anymore and is it a real religion?

Thank you,
Jess



Just one mention that these depraved Discordians are in our schools, and we're in like Flynn, methinks. Or is that too sinister?

I'm in.  But being in England, I'll need to find some british advice columnists.  Will have a look and post them here, if that's ok?  As for the site, I think it's a given that it must be done.  I'll ask a friend of mine if he would be interested in making a fake site for it. (He's not a member of the forums here, but he was the one who introduced me to discordianism so he's ok. :)  No promises whether he'll do it, but never hurts to ask. :)

Thanks Muir, but uh...are there any Americans interested?

I totally forgot that I was the one who started this thread.  Which would seem to imply that I have some measure of responsibility to seeing that something gets done about it...

Awesome! So what do you think about the date for buzz week? Too soon? Too late? Just right?

Actually Quantum, I am American - just living in the UK. 

Also, why is it that all of these gasms seem to be USA only? I would have thought that international coverage would be a good thing (i.e. make it seem more "real")...

Because most of the people here are Americans. If you want a more local flavor of chaos, you should head over to poee.co.uk.

Quote from: Muir on February 09, 2010, 10:29:56 AM
Actually Quantum, I am American - just living in the UK. 

Also, why is it that all of these gasms seem to be USA only? I would have thought that international coverage would be a good thing (i.e. make it seem more "real")...

If you want more UK GASMS, then start some.

hehe, that actually makes sense, good Doktor. ;)  I'll have to look into doing just that. Although I'll still gladly help out in the US "only" ones when I can, as the more people involved equals more hilarity.  Also, in this case, an american email address is easily obtainable.

Quantum, there is one problem with poee.co.uk - it's pretty much dead.  The front page hasn't been updated since November last year.

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 09, 2010, 05:42:03 AM
Awesome! So what do you think about the date for buzz week? Too soon? Too late? Just right?

TBH I no longer think such impersonal GASMs have any use beyond the fun the have for the one perpetrating them.  So I really no longer care about AbbyGASM.

So you don't like AbbyGASM or GASMs in general?

Quote from: Satzanfang on February 09, 2010, 06:15:07 PM

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 09, 2010, 05:42:03 AM
Awesome! So what do you think about the date for buzz week? Too soon? Too late? Just right?

TBH I no longer think such impersonal GASMs have any use beyond the fun the have for the one perpetrating them.  So I really no longer care about AbbyGASM.

TBH your opinion is whack


but regardless--
we're not seeing a lot of people go "sign me up!" so maybe this idea wasn't fun enough to begin with

Quote from: Cramulus on February 10, 2010, 04:09:13 PM

Quote from: Satzanfang on February 09, 2010, 06:15:07 PM

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 09, 2010, 05:42:03 AM
Awesome! So what do you think about the date for buzz week? Too soon? Too late? Just right?

TBH I no longer think such impersonal GASMs have any use beyond the fun the have for the one perpetrating them.  So I really no longer care about AbbyGASM.

TBH your opinion is whack


but regardless--
we're not seeing a lot of people go "sign me up!" so maybe this idea wasn't fun enough to begin with

No, is good!

I'm in.

I have a few friends that can help out by writing some letters, too.

I say we do this shit. I don't know how to wikki, so if someone puts one together, I can spread it around a bit.

You know, on second thought, we should move the buzz week up to March 7th-13th. We don't need more than three weeks to prepare. No one with any programming experience has showed up, so we won't be able to do the website thing anyway.

I'm still totally into it; we just need to coordinate so that each columnist gets no more than ONE of each letter, from various parts of the country, if people decide to use the sample letters.

Say we have seven letters and seven volunteers. Each volunteer chooses one letter, modified slightly, to send to each of the columnists. Each columnist then receives seven different letters from seven different parts of the country. We stagger the sending dates by person so that the letters don't all arrive at once.

More than six or seven seems like overkill.

So right now we've got Nigel, dimo, Muir and myself. And maybe Crammulus ? Muir, since we're using email for this don't worry about finding UK columnists, just use an email account that doesn't have the ".uk" in it. So now all we need is..

• Two more volunteers
• Two more letters
• A mailing schedule

Or we could just go with the people and letters we have. We've got 5 & 5.

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 11, 2010, 02:32:16 AM
So right now we've got Nigel, dimo, Muir and myself. And maybe Crammulus ? Muir, since we're using email for this don't worry about finding UK columnists, just use an email account that doesn't have the ".uk" in it. So now all we need is..

• Two more volunteers
• Two more letters
• A mailing schedule

Or we could just go with the people and letters we have. We've got 5 & 5.

I think five is just fine; let's roll with it, and if anyone else wants to join in we'll come up with another letter.

BUT ZOMG LOLFIVES!!!

This is sounding good. Just let me know when exactly I should send one.

Sure thing! I have a ymail.com account that I don't use for a personal email account so that'll work. :)  I might still be able to get someone to do up a quick website or maybe even a wiki for this.  The person I had in mind hasn't been online for the last couple days, but I found out that another of my friends is discordian yesterday so I'll ask him.  At the very least, a wiki page will lend credibility in case these columnists do some online research.  I'll let you know by the end of the day one way or the other.  

Also, I think if we send an email a day to each person say...next week?  That way they have plenty of time to read it and reply (after all, most "agony aunt's" admit that letter's are queued up a couple weeks in advance.).  

Gotta love those 5's, eh Nigel? :P

Edit:  When I say website/wiki I mean a fake one about "Discordian Devival"  saying when it is and stuff like "contact your local cabal or discordian irc for exact location(s) and password for entry" ;)

Right!  A friend has agreed to make a wiki page highlighting the "discordian devival" as well as make a simple website. (I've managed to get a domain name and 3 months free hosting which should be enough for what we need) My friend says some pictures to put on the site would be good, so if any of you have anything suitable, please link to them here.  He says "People would be nice. Hot dog stands perhaps ;) Or anything vaguely Discordian."  Will post more info (links and such to the wiki and site) as I can.

I'm definitely in.

Good point, Muir. Since everybody's ready to go right now, there's really no reason to wait another 3 weeks. And the letters probably won't be read the same week that we send them, so that'll give your friend some extra time to whip up a website.

So yeah, let's bump this up to next week. As for the the mailing schedule, the dice told me to do this:

• Monday - Quantum
• Tuesday - Muir
• Wednesday - Nigel
• Thursday- Dimo
• Friday- Cram

And just to recap, each of us is going to pick one of the sample letters (or write your own if you want) and send it to all of the columnists (list on pg 9) on your day. I'm going to do this one

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on April 29, 2008, 01:39:15 AM
Dear Advice Columnist,

Me and my best friend Josh have known each other for practically ever... we even went to first grade in the same class. We always have spent almost every weekend together and sometimes we go on vacations and camping with each others families. We are both juniors at Lincoln High, and we are planning to start applying to the same colleges soon so we can go to college together. He is pretty much the person I am closest to in the whole world besides my sister and my mom... we tell each other EVERYTHING. About six months ago Josh started talking about this book he read, called the Principia Discordia. It was pretty cool and he got me to read it, but I guess I didn't think it was as deep or whatever as he did... it's mostly just a bunch of goofy stuff written a long time ago, like when our parents were kids. Anyway, after a couple of months of trying to talk to me about it, he said that he found some other people who are really into it online... The Discordian Society or something like that... and now he says his religion is Discordian and he's going to this thing called the Devival, which is a big festival where they all get together and, I guess, worship.

Here's the thing that I'm really having a problem with, though, is that because I'm not into the Discordian Society, this is the first time Josh has ever gotten all excited about doing something WITHOUT me. I feel so left out, and he doesn't seem to get it. I thought we were best friends, and it's like he's forgotten all about it. My mom says that when people grow up sometimes they can grow apart, and nobody seems at all concerned about what he's doing, but honestly it's WIERD. It's not AT ALL like the old Josh, and not like the stuff we used to do together. He's not even excited about looking at college brochures anymore, and he talks about doing things that sound, well maybe not illegal, but definitely things that sound like trouble, I can't really go into details because he doesn't talk about it to me very much anymore. Please help! Nobody will listen to me! All the adults I know just tell me not to worry or they say that I'll get over it, but I am not the one who needs to get over anything! I just want my old best friend back. :(

Sincerly,

Becky Strodtmeyer

I noticed that there wasn't an email address for Billy Graham's "My Answer" column. Go here http://www.billygraham.org/Contact_BGEA.asp (http://www.billygraham.org/Contact_BGEA.asp) And click "spiritual question" on the drop box labelled "Begin by selecting the primary topic of your message". Unless you really want to send him a physical letter. So now we just need some suggestions and pics for the website. Maybe the Devival should be an Erisian version of the Witches Sabbat. And we could have a list of people who are going to be ordained at the event by taking the sex, drugs and rock & roll vows.

This is good. I'm probably going to write my own letter, but I have a question. Am I to alter the letter slightly for each coloumn, or will it not matter?

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 11, 2010, 01:45:12 PM
Good point, Muir. Since everybody's ready to go right now, there's really no reason to wait another 3 weeks. And the letters probably won't be read the same week that we send them, so that'll give your friend some extra time to whip up a website.

So yeah, let's bump this up to next week. As for the the mailing schedule, the dice told me to do this:

• Monday - Quantum
• Tuesday - Muir
• Wednesday - Nigel
• Thursday- Dimo
• Friday- Cram

Oh hey, hold on, how about no? I'm busy. March 7-13 is fine for me, but short-notice reschedulings do not work for me. I have shit to do next week, and I need the additional time to write & modify my letters and get snail addresses for the columnists. Since I'm busy all week & don't have one big free block of time for this, I have to do it a bit at a time in the evenings.

Quote from: dimo on February 11, 2010, 07:16:36 PM
This is good. I'm probably going to write my own letter, but I have a question. Am I to alter the letter slightly for each coloumn, or will it not matter?

I plan to modify my letter slightly for each columnist, but I don't think it's necessary.

The website domain I grabbed is http://www.discordian-devival.org  It isn't up yet, so right now all you'll get is an error message.  I'll post here as soon as it's up and running, which should hopefully be early next week.  The wiki-page will also be posted up once the website is up and running.

I'll grab the 1st letter - the one written by "Lita" and will modify it just a little with each person I email it to.

What happened to the old Devival website?

Ok, so we're back on to March 7-13, because I like to bold things. As for the old site, I looked it up when I read the thread but the link is dead. Maybe we should ask the guy who made it. But then again, maybe not, since we've already got another one in the works.

I'm sorry, one more question. Are we sending both snail and electronic, or one or the other?

Email addresses have been located for the columns that we want to hit so this can all be done via email but if you want to send letters that's fine. The key thing though is to only send one letter/email to each of the columns.

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 12, 2010, 02:41:45 AM
Ok, so we're back on to March 7-13, because I like to bold things. As for the old site, I looked it up when I read the thread but the link is dead. Maybe we should ask the guy who made it. But then again, maybe not, since we've already got another one in the works.

I don't know if you ever saw the old site, but it was brilliant in that it was nothing but a polished front page and a box for entering a password, which no matter what you entered gave you the message "I'm sorry, but you do not have clearance to enter this site" or something along those lines. I think 000 designed it.

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/devival2009/

Quote from: Cramulus on February 12, 2010, 05:59:03 PM
http://www.principiadiscordia.com/devival2009/

It's so perfect. Any way it can get updated to say 2010?

Quote from: Cramulus on February 12, 2010, 05:59:03 PM
http://www.principiadiscordia.com/devival2009/

That is one sweet lookin' page ya got there.

trip made it!

paging dr. zilch, dr. zilch nippletits~!

I'll update it tomorrow.

Will be for the second time in fact :)

I never saw this before.  Could someone PM me the password?

If you don't have the password, you probably weren't invited, sorry. Maybe next year though.

Quote from: Triple Zero on February 13, 2010, 10:36:37 AM
If you don't have the password, you probably weren't invited, sorry. Maybe next year though.

Ken I haz passwordz?

Quote from: Triple Zero on February 13, 2010, 12:19:45 AM
I'll update it tomorrow.

Will be for the second time in fact :)

Yay!

Also

:lulz:

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/devival2010

 :memnoch:

BAD ASS TESTICLE


if you type:
fnord

it should link you to:
that fucking fish

Quote from: Cramulus on February 14, 2010, 06:13:18 PM
:memnoch:

BAD ASS TESTICLE


if you type:
fnord

it should link you to:
that fucking fish

That would be hilarious!

hm, point.

i could at least log the passwords and see what spags enter, as well :lol:

who knows I might phish a few of their MSN passwords

... Which makes me wonder how many forum accounts on PD have "fnord" as their password.

Quote from: Triple Zero on February 14, 2010, 06:57:28 PM
... Which makes me wonder how many forum accounts on PD have "fnord" as their password.

Finding out could be a worthwhile experiment.

It's four.


suck it, law of fives.

Quote from: Triple Zero on February 15, 2010, 12:06:28 PM
It's four.


suck it, law of fives.

Hahahaha!

Way to go, people with obvious passwords!

Hey, didn't someone herealready buy a domain name? Does that mean that we're gonna have two devival sites? Maybe one of the sites should be from a rival sect of Discordianism.

I'm in on this, as long as I don't get swamped with studying.

EDIT: Deleted for your own protection.

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 16, 2010, 03:56:01 AM
Hey, didn't someone herealready buy a domain name? Does that mean that we're gonna have two devival sites? Maybe one of the sites should be from a rival sect of Discordianism.

Yeah, I did. And yes it does, assuming the fugging server decides to work.. >_>  Also, a friend did up a wiki page.  Don't think it's up yet though, as he's waiting for my site to start working.  If it doesn't soon though (say tomorrow) I'll have him put the one linked above on it.

http://discordian-devival.org/  and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Devival are now up.  They are only meant to be "events and statistics" pages.  The webmaster email at the bottom of the website is one of mine.  I will reply to any emails with a link to the other website and a fake password. :) 

Quote from: dimo on February 16, 2010, 06:28:27 PM
Comments?

Looks good to me.

You know...all of this talk about the Devival almost makes me wanna start a real one. Everyone seems really spread out but I bet we can find some event (like DragonCon) that lots of us will attend anyway. Maybe we could get something going at one of those things.

Quote from: Muir on February 16, 2010, 07:19:55 PM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Devival are now up. 

:mittens:

NICE

^_^ Thanks 000.  I'll pass on the compliment to my friend Tigz - he's the one who did them.

Quote from: Cramulus on February 10, 2010, 04:09:13 PM

Quote from: Satzanfang on February 09, 2010, 06:15:07 PM

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 09, 2010, 05:42:03 AM
Awesome! So what do you think about the date for buzz week? Too soon? Too late? Just right?

TBH I no longer think such impersonal GASMs have any use beyond the fun the have for the one perpetrating them.  So I really no longer care about AbbyGASM.

TBH your opinion is whack


but regardless--
we're not seeing a lot of people go "sign me up!" so maybe this idea wasn't fun enough to begin with

I think the real reason was that I've been in a grumpy cynical mood and the OP represents a time when I was a little more optimistic. 

But it looks like you guys are actually going to pull this off, so kudos!

Quote from: Muir on February 16, 2010, 07:19:55 PM
http://discordian-devival.org/  and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Devival are now up.  They are only meant to be "events and statistics" pages.  The webmaster email at the bottom of the website is one of mine.  I will reply to any emails with a link to the other website and a fake password. :) 

Those are awesome!

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 17, 2010, 04:13:34 AM
You know...all of this talk about the Devival almost makes me wanna start a real one. Everyone seems really spread out but I bet we can find some event (like DragonCon) that lots of us will attend anyway. Maybe we could get something going at one of those things.

I'd be more willing to attend Devival than Burning Man. I would, however, suggest doing it somewhere people can camp.

We could all bring a copy of the PD, and on the last day, we could burn them.

side thought: Burning Ham.

It's like Burning Man but we mostly just cook pork.

Quote from: Cramulus on February 17, 2010, 11:58:35 PM
side thought: Burning Ham.

It's like Burning Man but we mostly just cook pork.

I LOVE THIS.

It also ties into the hot dog angle!

This is sheer art! I love the devival section on principiadiscordia.com site :)

Also, Burning Ham sounds enough like Birmingham that when you tell people you're going to Burning Ham they won't register it, at all.

I call for at least one whole hog roast that week. I will gladly buy a hog.

My favorite part of the wiki article is the guy on the talk page complaining that Devivals aren't uniquely Discordian. I don't know who Chaos5023 (dude on the talk page) and Frank Westerton (the author) are but if they're the same guy, kudos on maintaining the illusion. And if 5023 isn't Frank, then additional kudos to frank for foolin' ye olde internets.

I'm not entirely sure what Burning Man is but I agree that hog roastin' sounds much better. I don't know about all this camping stuff though. It'd be more fun in a major city, maximize the opportunity for mass disruption.

Quote from: Triple Zero on February 17, 2010, 02:54:07 PM

Quote from: Muir on February 16, 2010, 07:19:55 PM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Devival are now up. 

:mittens:

NICE

:mittens: fuckin ohmygod NICE - excellent form and style, good sir!

YOU, GOOD SIR must stick around.  :mrgreen:

hehe.  Thanks Cramulus.  (Also, I'm a gal. Not to be confused with "lady"  cuz I'm definitely not nice and polite enough to be one of those. :P)

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on February 18, 2010, 02:17:10 AM
Also, Burning Ham sounds enough like Birmingham that when you tell people you're going to Burning Ham they won't register it, at all.

I call for at least one whole hog roast that week. I will gladly buy a hog.

I dunno about the other coast, but a lot of states around here have towns called Birmingham. It might complicate matters to hold Burning Ham in Birmingham  :evil:

then that sounds like a perfect place to hold a maybe non existant Devival!

Quantum:  The author of the page is my friend.  "Frank Westerton" is a name he made up on the spur of the moment (he does this often).  "Chaos5023" is not him, as far as I know.  

Also:  I can ask him to change the wiki page and website to say that one of the "voted for" and "confirmed" locations is Birmingham. :3

There's a Birmingham in Alabama. So we'd get double points for alliterative confusion and for creating chaos in the Bible belt.

Quote from: Lord Quantum on February 18, 2010, 02:54:43 AM
My favorite part of the wiki article is the guy on the talk page complaining that Devivals aren't uniquely Discordian. I don't know who Chaos5023 (dude on the talk page) and Frank Westerton (the author) are but if they're the same guy, kudos on maintaining the illusion. And if 5023 isn't Frank, then additional kudos to frank for foolin' ye olde internets.

I'm not entirely sure what Burning Man is but I agree that hog roastin' sounds much better. I don't know about all this camping stuff though. It'd be more fun in a major city, maximize the opportunity for mass disruption.

Major City + Camping = Win

If someone makes a poster I'll print them out and put them up around DC and Baltimore.

Well we still need a date and a location and all that. If we're really gonna do this, we should move this to a different thread and see who's interested. As for AbbyGASM, we're still set for March 7th-13th. and I think we've got six people now.

Just checked the devival wiki page.  It's garnered a small amount of interest in the last few days.  Check out all the pages it's been linked to from:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:WhatLinksHere/Devival 

The Subgenii had an event at DragonCon last year? What? I feel like we're slackin' on our pimpin'.
http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/DragonCon09/index.html (http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/DragonCon09/index.html)

And I checked out the Talk page. Frank has slipped the Burning Ham/Birmingham joke into the discussion. Brilliance!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Devival (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Devival)

Oh...and what the WTF is up with the "Questions regarding Devival" thread? I liked Captain USA's idea of combining the Devival with PosterGASM though. We should do that. And Nigel's right. Burning Ham needs to happen in Utah.

hehe, yeah I mentioned the joke to him and he said he would get it in there one way or another. :P

Completely agree with the Devival PosterGASM.  If Captain USA makes a poster, then I'll gladly post it in assorted shops and pubs here.

I edited some info about the Cyclone of Slack into the wikipedia article.

Ok, so right now we've got me, Cram, Nigel, Muir, Dimo and maybe Shioichi. Is anybody else planning to participate? Speak before the end of the week or forever hold your peace.

I've got the emails all typed up and saved.  Just waiting for the word. :3

Monday is D-Day.

Word 'em up. Are we going to stagger the days each of us are sending our letters out?

Quote from: DIMOVOLCANO on March 04, 2010, 05:06:22 PM
Word 'em up. Are we going to stagger the days each of us are sending our letters out?

We really should.

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 04, 2010, 05:57:23 PM

Quote from: DIMOVOLCANO on March 04, 2010, 05:06:22 PM
Word 'em up. Are we going to stagger the days each of us are sending our letters out?

We really should.

Ok someone just letme know what day I should take.

Quote from: DIMOVOLCANO on March 04, 2010, 06:07:45 PM

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 04, 2010, 05:57:23 PM

Quote from: DIMOVOLCANO on March 04, 2010, 05:06:22 PM
Word 'em up. Are we going to stagger the days each of us are sending our letters out?

We really should.

Ok someone just letme know what day I should take.

Pick a day. No one else has yet. I'll take Thursday.

Who is using which sample letter/writing their own? We need to make sure there's no overlap.

Got an email asking if I could point this guy to a list of the locations of this devival.  Here's my reply and his email (my apologies for the cliche/noob uses of discordian phrases/words :P ):

QuoteGreetings Gareth!

Simply go to http://www.principiadiscordia.com/devival2010/

You will notice that a password is needed. Fnord!This password can not contain any letters or numbers.Fnord!

The password is:  thinkfouryourselfsmuck23

Once Eris has found you worthy enough to grant you access to the site, you will find a full list of all the locations of this years Devival.


Signed,

Pope Tea Biscuit the 32th




From: Gareth Juleff <gaza_juleff@hotmail.com>
To: teabiscuit32@ymail.com
Sent: Wed, 3 March, 2010 22:51:47
Subject: Devival

I was wondering how it would be possible to find out where the 2010 Devival will be taking place before it actually occurs?
My awakening to Eris came too late to partake in the previous Devival so i was hoping to be able to come this year.
If you could point me in the right direction i would be truely grateful.
Thanks

Gareth

And Hail Eris

Also: dibs on tuesday, since that's the only free day I have next week. x_x  And I'll be sending slightly modified  copies of the first letter (the one from "Lita")

I'm going to use the letter I wrote, and I'll take Friday if that's cool with you guys.

I'll do self-written letters, and I'll lay claim to Wednesday.

For double plus convenience, here's the schedule

Mon - Me (Becky's letter)
Tues - Muir (Lita's letter)
Wed- Shioichi (self-written)
Thu - Nigel ( (self-written)
Fri -dimo (self-written)
Sat - Cram (unknown & mysterious)

I think Cram should pretend to be an A.I!

Hm if nobody's going to use those other sample letters I might just use one of them.

As I'm sure you've all noticed, the last two people on the list, Miss Manners and Billy Graham, don't have email addresses. For those of you, who, like me, were planning on doing this thing totally electronically, here's Miss Manners' email (or one of them anyway, she seems to have several). Make sure the subject line reads "Question for Miss Manners".

manners@microsoft.com

As for Billy Graham go here and select "spiritual question"
http://www.billygraham.org/Contact_BGEA.asp

So anyway, today was my day to start the invasion and I'm happy to report that everything went smoothly. I would also like to report that I saw Saving Private Ryan last night and am feeling really pumped for absolutely no reason. That is all. Quantum out.

Progress Report: I just received a reply from the advice Amy column. In my letter I mentioned that my pastor told me that Discordians are dangerous. Now Amy wants to know "How are these people "dangerous"? Did you ask your pastor or did you just take his word for it. Please copy this entire e-mail into your reply." I don't wanna overdo it but I don't wanna under do it either. Any suggestions on what I should tell her? Keep in mind that I've already said that Discordians aren't involved in anything illegal. I did present myself as a youth minister though, so maybe "spiritually dangerous" would work but I don't know...thought I'd get some feedback before I respond.

Quote from: Lord Quantum on March 09, 2010, 08:45:59 AM
Progress Report: I just received a reply from the advice Amy column. In my letter I mentioned that my pastor told me that Discordians are dangerous. Now Amy wants to know "How are these people "dangerous"? Did you ask your pastor or did you just take his word for it. Please copy this entire e-mail into your reply." I don't wanna overdo it but I don't wanna under do it either. Any suggestions on what I should tell her? Keep in mind that I've already said that Discordians aren't involved in anything illegal. I did present myself as a youth minister though, so maybe "spiritually dangerous" would work but I don't know...thought I'd get some feedback before I respond.

Maybe something about perverting your faith? That seems to be our modus operandi, a bit.

Quote from: Iason Ouabache on April 22, 2008, 12:01:08 AM

Quote from: Professor Cramulus on April 21, 2008, 03:46:30 PM

To Do:

• Collect addresses of the ten most popular advice columns.

Amy Dickson:  askamy@tribune.com
Dear Abby: http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/dearabby_form.html
Cheryl Lavin: cheryllavin@aol.com
Carolyn Hax: tellme@washpost.com
Since You Asked (Salon): advice@salon.com
Advice Goddess:  adviceamy@aol.com
Savage Love: mail@savagelove.net
Billy Graham: "My Answer," c/o Billy Graham, Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, 1 Billy Graham Parkway, Charlotte, N.C., 28201  (can't find e-mail)
Miss Manners, c/o the Chicago Tribune, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611


We could try to hit up a few college newspaper advice columns too.

Quoth for bump.

Quote from: Lord Quantum on March 09, 2010, 08:45:59 AM
Progress Report: I just received a reply from the advice Amy column. In my letter I mentioned that my pastor told me that Discordians are dangerous. Now Amy wants to know "How are these people "dangerous"? Did you ask your pastor or did you just take his word for it. Please copy this entire e-mail into your reply." I don't wanna overdo it but I don't wanna under do it either. Any suggestions on what I should tell her? Keep in mind that I've already said that Discordians aren't involved in anything illegal. I did present myself as a youth minister though, so maybe "spiritually dangerous" would work but I don't know...thought I'd get some feedback before I respond.

Maybe something about how their way of thinking leads to an extreme sense of paranoia, which in turn leads to a whole slew of "dangerous' or harmful behaviors, sprititual, social and otherwise.

Quote from: dimo on March 09, 2010, 05:14:37 PM

Quote from: Lord Quantum on March 09, 2010, 08:45:59 AM
Progress Report: I just received a reply from the advice Amy column. In my letter I mentioned that my pastor told me that Discordians are dangerous. Now Amy wants to know "How are these people "dangerous"? Did you ask your pastor or did you just take his word for it. Please copy this entire e-mail into your reply." I don't wanna overdo it but I don't wanna under do it either. Any suggestions on what I should tell her? Keep in mind that I've already said that Discordians aren't involved in anything illegal. I did present myself as a youth minister though, so maybe "spiritually dangerous" would work but I don't know...thought I'd get some feedback before I respond.

Maybe something about how their way of thinking leads to an extreme sense of paranoia, which in turn leads to a whole slew of "dangerous' or harmful behaviors, sprititual, social and otherwise.

That's good. I would also play up the whole "they take order/disorder and creative/destructive more seriously than good/evil".

Quote from: Telarus on March 09, 2010, 05:16:40 PM

Quote from: dimo on March 09, 2010, 05:14:37 PM

Quote from: Lord Quantum on March 09, 2010, 08:45:59 AM
Progress Report: I just received a reply from the advice Amy column. In my letter I mentioned that my pastor told me that Discordians are dangerous. Now Amy wants to know "How are these people "dangerous"? Did you ask your pastor or did you just take his word for it. Please copy this entire e-mail into your reply." I don't wanna overdo it but I don't wanna under do it either. Any suggestions on what I should tell her? Keep in mind that I've already said that Discordians aren't involved in anything illegal. I did present myself as a youth minister though, so maybe "spiritually dangerous" would work but I don't know...thought I'd get some feedback before I respond.

Maybe something about how their way of thinking leads to an extreme sense of paranoia, which in turn leads to a whole slew of "dangerous' or harmful behaviors, sprititual, social and otherwise.

That's good. I would also play up the whole "they take order/disorder and creative/destructive more seriously than good/evil".

or that they don't see things in terms of good and evil, which leaves too much "grey areas" ( :lulz: grey) for them to participate in potentially evil actions.

they believe that jesus christ was a literary construction and has as much contemporary validity as Captain Ahab.

All sent. I may try to send something to the college newspapers here this week as well.

Well I just sent off my response. I told her that Discordians are a dangerous bunch dedicated to causing panic and paranoia in American society. I hope I didn't overdo my description. I guess we'll find out. Has anyone else gotten a response?

Reminder to self. Send letters tomorrow.

I just found a response to my letter from Acvice Amy as well, she thought that I was Lord Quantum. I played it off a bit confused, and am playing the concerned friend looking for more info card.

Oh shit. I forgot to send mine, am going to do it on Monday instead, to space it out a bit.

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 12, 2010, 06:10:35 AM
Oh shit. I forgot to send mine, am going to do it on Monday instead, to space it out a bit.

Probably not a bad idea (spacing it out) considering some of the responses we've received so far.

I didn't really expect the emails to actually be read this quickly. But on the other hand, if we'd all sent letters who knows if they would've been read at all. Did anyone actually send a physical letter?

Quote from: Lord Quantum on March 12, 2010, 02:27:29 PM
I didn't really expect the emails to actually be read this quickly. But on the other hand, if we'd all sent letters who knows if they would've been read at all. Did anyone actually send a physical letter?

I'm sending mine via snail mail.

All letters sent. I am going back to the post containing my letter and deleting it so it won't show up in a google search or anything.

Hrmm. Maybe we should have spaced this out more... I got the following responses.

Quote from: Advice AmyI get that there's some campaign to write me about this. Yesterday, I spent about half an hour talking a guy out of suicide, then helping a girl who was raped get counseling in her town. If you want to believe, sans evidence, in god, have at it, but please don't be so rude as to waste my time...you and your cohorts. If you'd like to use your capacity for rational thought, Albert Ellis' Guide For Rational Living is a good place to start. Aristotle is helpful as well.

Quote from: Savagelovecome on.

Is this woth writing back to, to try and clear my name, or should I just leave it be?

Oh dear. :(

Spacing them out a bit more would probably be best. Maybe extend this for the next month or so? I mean, if people keep writing about something for over a month, there must be something going on, right?

On the other hand, Amy does have a point about distracting her from more important issues. Meh.

Quote from: Shioichi on March 13, 2010, 02:22:34 AM
Spacing them out a bit more would probably be best. Maybe extend this for the next month or so? I mean, if people keep writing about something for over a month, there must be something going on, right?

On the other hand, Amy does have a point about distracting her from more important issues. Meh.

Oh, fuck the little self-important "advice columnist" if she really thinks her job in the entertainment section is bringing about some kind of social good. She's a fluff writer and needs to not take herself so damn seriously.

If she wanted to help people, she'd be a therapist or a social worker, not an advice columnist.

Point taken. On that note, perhaps we should have a bit of fun with her, yes? :evil:

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 13, 2010, 03:08:11 AM

Quote from: Shioichi on March 13, 2010, 02:22:34 AM
Spacing them out a bit more would probably be best. Maybe extend this for the next month or so? I mean, if people keep writing about something for over a month, there must be something going on, right?

On the other hand, Amy does have a point about distracting her from more important issues. Meh.

Oh, fuck the little self-important "advice columnist" if she really thinks her job in the entertainment section is bringing about some kind of social good. She's a fluff writer and needs to not take herself so damn seriously.

If she wanted to help people, she'd be a therapist or a social worker, not an advice columnist.

That's exactly what went through my head when I read it. Aristotle my ass, condescending bitch.

Anyhow, that's just a couple of them, I haven't heard back from the rest, so we'll see how it goes from here. Maybe, while we're waiting, we can tweak this concept a little bit. Like, maybe hit magazine letter's sections. A lot of magazines these days will print anything, and the people who read them will beleive anything, so it looks like an easy target to me. I, personally, don't read a lot of magazines, so off the top of my head,I wouldn't be able to make a list of marks, but it would probably be easy to find the most susceptible ones. We could tailor the letters to match the genre of the magazine and such... I dunno... thoughts?

Quote from: dimo on March 12, 2010, 10:11:29 PM
All letters sent. I am going back to the post containing my letter and deleting it so it won't show up in a google search or anything.

someone correct me if I'm wrong, but since GASM Command is a subforum of O:MF it's only visible to logged in users and shouldn't show up in any search engine, would it?

Quote from: Triple Zero on March 13, 2010, 06:20:45 PM

Quote from: dimo on March 12, 2010, 10:11:29 PM
All letters sent. I am going back to the post containing my letter and deleting it so it won't show up in a google search or anything.

someone correct me if I'm wrong, but since GASM Command is a subforum of O:MF it's only visible to logged in users and shouldn't show up in any search engine, would it?

TBH, I wouldn't know. But, just in case...

I figured it was easier to delete it than argue about it.

If you search for "abbygasm" on google it takes you to this page: http://www.blackironprison.com/index.php?title=AbbyGASM  (first hit).  But if we're being honest, these people aren't going to know the phrase and are most likely to google "Discordianism" which just takes you to wiki and "devival" which results in Subgenius sites.

In any event, I've been ill all week (still am, actually) and as such my emails have not been sent out.  Considering the responses from this "Amy" person, it's probably a good thing.  I will send them out later on this week. Or alternatively, one every couple days to space them out a bit more. :)

Quote from: Triple Zero on March 13, 2010, 06:20:45 PM

Quote from: dimo on March 12, 2010, 10:11:29 PM
All letters sent. I am going back to the post containing my letter and deleting it so it won't show up in a google search or anything.

someone correct me if I'm wrong, but since GASM Command is a subforum of O:MF it's only visible to logged in users and shouldn't show up in any search engine, would it?

You are correct. There is no need for any "just in case", unless we can get some of these advice columnists to come register (and post) here, which would be a win IMO.

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 13, 2010, 10:07:22 PM

Quote from: Triple Zero on March 13, 2010, 06:20:45 PM

Quote from: dimo on March 12, 2010, 10:11:29 PM
All letters sent. I am going back to the post containing my letter and deleting it so it won't show up in a google search or anything.

someone correct me if I'm wrong, but since GASM Command is a subforum of O:MF it's only visible to logged in users and shouldn't show up in any search engine, would it?

You are correct. There is no need for any "just in case", unless we can get some of these advice columnists to come register (and post) here, which would be a win IMO.

Ok, my b. I suppose I could repost it, if it's of any value.

Either way, good to know.

Well kudos to her for figuring it out ('cause that was so difficult, right?)  but like Nigel said, she's not actually helping anyone and if anything she's hurting people. There's a reason why real counselor's have little things we like to call training and certification. And after reading her little response, I think she deserves her own personal AmyGASM. As for AbbyGASM, clearly anyone who hasn't shipped their letters should just ignore her at this point. Or send her extra stuff.

Oh, Miss Amy isn't going to be ignored. I'm going to make a special email just for her. :D 

So I take it that everyone has sent their stuff out by now. Did anyone else receive any feedback?

Aside from Amy, I've gotten two responses. One was from one of Billy Graham's pawns. As for the other: hxxp://www.talesfromthefront.com/

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner


http://www.talesfromthefront.com/2010/03/religion-and-hot-dogs-unholy-alliance.html (http://www.talesfromthefront.com/2010/03/religion-and-hot-dogs-unholy-alliance.html)

Quote from: Lord Quantum on March 21, 2010, 03:02:45 AM
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner


http://www.talesfromthefront.com/2010/03/religion-and-hot-dogs-unholy-alliance.html (http://www.talesfromthefront.com/2010/03/religion-and-hot-dogs-unholy-alliance.html)

W00T!

I forgot to ask - what did Billy Graham say? Did the pawn say that they were going to publish your letter somehow or was it just a form letter response?

My opinion is that we keep updating the Devival page and keep up the letters, at a rate of one every month or so, until someone starts looking into it more seriously.

Oh, and you know what a great meta-jake would be? If we started writing conspiracy theory letters about Discordianism to Playboy. They don't even have to be convincing; we just have to keep it up, possibly for years.

Count me in, for whatever it's worth.

Lord Quantum:

QuoteThank you for your e-mail to Mr. Graham. He regrets that he cannot personally receive and answer all the correspondence that is directed to him; however, his associates represent him and we regard every contact as important.

We can understand your concern about your friend's recent involvement with a group known as Discordians. While we are not familiar with the group, a brief web search shows that Discordianism, which we assume is associated with this group you referred to, seems to be a strange compilation of philosophies and beliefs that are not biblical and would mislead people away from the truth. "Devivals" appear to be the name that they call their gatherings.

It is important that you continue to pray diligently for your friend. Pray that God would draw her towards truth and to see through deception. Pray also that He will give you wisdom on when, how, and what to say to her. Often the best approach to discussing these types of issues with people is to ask them to tell you about it more. Ask for explanations and clarification and as she shares things, it will give you an opportunity to point out where the Bible speaks differently about the same issues. If she raises concerns you don't know how to address, do not panic. Take the time to understand what the Bible says through studying it yourself and the guidance of a pastor. Trust God to use you and He will.

We have prayed for you, Jacob. May God draw you closer to Himself as you trust Him to work in your friend's life.

Sincerely,
 
Jamie M. Adams (ma)
Christian Guidance Department
Billy Graham Evangelistic Association

Pretty much this. Kinda what I expected, no mention of any publishing.

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 21, 2010, 05:00:36 AM
Oh, and you know what a great meta-jake would be? If we started writing conspiracy theory letters about Discordianism to Playboy. They don't even have to be convincing; we just have to keep it up, possibly for years.

you know that RAW used to write for Playboy, right?

Also, at least one piece of the clue-trail in Illuminatus! was a Playboy letter.

and Lord Quantum, FUCK YEAH!

Also, if the Devival page needs updating, let me know what to put there.

Quote from: Triple Zero on March 22, 2010, 10:17:52 AM

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 21, 2010, 05:00:36 AM
Oh, and you know what a great meta-jake would be? If we started writing conspiracy theory letters about Discordianism to Playboy. They don't even have to be convincing; we just have to keep it up, possibly for years.

you know that RAW used to write for Playboy, right?

Also, at least one piece of the clue-trail in Illuminatus! was a Playboy letter.

and Lord Quantum, FUCK YEAH!

Also, if the Devival page needs updating, let me know what to put there.

Wait, so now we're planning a meta-meta jake? SWEET! So what are we talking about here? A ten year plan to send 1,000 letters to Playboy in which we connect every known conspiracy theory to a specific Discordian cabal? Because, as I'm sure you already know, the Great Googlie Mooglie cabal is responsible for 9/11 and TGRR is the one that told McCain to nominate Palin. And while we're on the topic, which one of you guys is responsible for launching the deep cover mole known as Glenn Beck?

Quote from: Lord Quantum on March 22, 2010, 02:34:59 PMAnd while we're on the topic, which one of you guys is responsible for launching the deep cover mole known as Glenn Beck?

Stephen Colbert.

Googlie Mooglie Cabal? Are you a RL friend of Rat's? (just curious)

Nope. Never met 'im, I just happened to hear about him in the ColbertGASM thread.

Quote from: Triple Zero on March 22, 2010, 10:17:52 AM

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 21, 2010, 05:00:36 AM
Oh, and you know what a great meta-jake would be? If we started writing conspiracy theory letters about Discordianism to Playboy. They don't even have to be convincing; we just have to keep it up, possibly for years.

you know that RAW used to write for Playboy, right?

Also, at least one piece of the clue-trail in Illuminatus! was a Playboy letter.

and Lord Quantum, FUCK YEAH!

Also, if the Devival page needs updating, let me know what to put there.

No, I had no idea whatsoever.

Quote from: Lord Quantum on March 22, 2010, 02:34:59 PM

Quote from: Triple Zero on March 22, 2010, 10:17:52 AM

Quote from: Calamity Nigel on March 21, 2010, 05:00:36 AM
Oh, and you know what a great meta-jake would be? If we started writing conspiracy theory letters about Discordianism to Playboy. They don't even have to be convincing; we just have to keep it up, possibly for years.

you know that RAW used to write for Playboy, right?

Also, at least one piece of the clue-trail in Illuminatus! was a Playboy letter.

and Lord Quantum, FUCK YEAH!

Also, if the Devival page needs updating, let me know what to put there.

Wait, so now we're planning a meta-meta jake? SWEET! So what are we talking about here? A ten year plan to send 1,000 letters to Playboy in which we connect every known conspiracy theory to a specific Discordian cabal? Because, as I'm sure you already know, the Great Googlie Mooglie cabal is responsible for 9/11 and TGRR is the one that told McCain to nominate Palin. And while we're on the topic, which one of you guys is responsible for launching the deep cover mole known as Glenn Beck?

Yes, this.