Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Bring and Brag => Topic started by: Agrippa on March 27, 2008, 06:06:04 PM

Title: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: Agrippa on March 27, 2008, 06:06:04 PM
Face East
Take a deep breath. Relax yourself.

Visualize a bright light pulsing trough your body. Visualise it becoming more and more powerful with each movement you make.

Raise your arms up in to the air, and cut trough the air in front of you.
Vibrate the word: Katana

Hold your arms in front of you, and stick out your index fingers. Stab trough the air in front of you.
Vibrate the word: Sai

Hold out your arms to the sides. Make a fist with your right hand and hit it in your left hand.
Vibrate the word: Bo.

Hold out your arms to the sides. Start swinging them wildly trough the air.
Vibrate the word: Nunchaku.

-----

Take your right index finger and draw in front of you
A very large Blue Pizza Slice starting at the bottom corner

When you are done drawing the Pizza Slice, take your right index finger
Thrust it into the center of the Pizza Slice and vibrate.
Tomato

Face to the South
Take your right index finger and draw in front of you
A very large Blue Pizza Slice starting at the bottom corner

When you are done drawing the Pizza Slice, take your right index finger
Thrust it into the center of the Pizza Slice and vibrate.
Mozzarella

Face to the West
Take your right index finger and draw in front of you
A very large Blue Pizza Slice starting at the bottom corner

When you are done drawing the Pizza Slice, take your right index finger
Thrust it into the center of the Pizza Slice and vibrate.
Mushroom

Face to the North
Take your right index finger and draw in front of you
A very large Blue Pizza Slice starting at the bottom corner

When you are done drawing the Pizza Slice, take your right index finger
Thrust it into the center of the Pizza Slice and vibrate.
Salami

Now you are back to where you started
Thrust your index finger into the first Pizza Slice to complete the Circle

-----------------------

Now hold both arms straight out to your sides for a few seconds
and contemplate how this ritual can banish imbalances in your astral body

Now say...

Before me stands...
(vibrate) Raphael

Behind me stands...
(vibrate) Leonardo

To my right stands...
(vibrate) Donatello

To my left stands...
(vibrate) Michelangelo

---

With your arms still stretched out, spread your feet
Out to the width of your shoulders. Declare:

Around me Flames the Pizza. Always hot and always without anchovies.
Within me the wisdom of Master Splinter.


Pull your feet back together
Hold your hands in front of your chest. Bow your head. Declare:
Cowabunga.

Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: LMNO on March 27, 2008, 06:09:55 PM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/STFU/stfuVader.jpg)
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: AFK on March 27, 2008, 06:12:10 PM
I love it![/SJ]
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: Triple Zero on March 27, 2008, 08:07:51 PM
sorry guys but i dont quite see what's wrong with this? it's a play on the LBRP (or whatever the acronym is), as you undoubtedly noticed.

unless mr Agrippa is suggesting to actually perform it as some sort of zany chaos magjidkque exercise, i think it's funny (though slightly tl/dr). especially considering one of those archangels you call the name of is named Rafael right? (at least, i thought so)
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on March 27, 2008, 10:53:25 PM
(http://somniphobia.com/src/1206580353273.jpg)
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: AFK on March 28, 2008, 12:43:01 PM
I don't think there's anything wrong with it.  But I do think it's something SJ would've added to his version of the PD.  And Truth be told, a couple of the things he added weren't all that bad. 
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: Agrippa on March 28, 2008, 05:11:56 PM
 :fnord: i caused strife!
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: LMNO on March 28, 2008, 05:17:51 PM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/STFU/stfuVader2.jpg)
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on March 28, 2008, 06:21:30 PM
I don't know, post it with a different name and use only latin sounding calling words and you could cross post at TCC for some serious lulz!

As is  :lulz: I like it!
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: Agrippa on March 28, 2008, 06:24:04 PM
Quote from: LMNO on March 28, 2008, 05:17:51 PM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/STFU/stfuVader2.jpg)

stop telling me what to do. you are not my father
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: LMNO on March 28, 2008, 06:27:58 PM
Heh.  Ok, that was mildly funny.
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: Cramulus on March 28, 2008, 08:26:48 PM
I lol'd


Agrippa, LMNO is telling you to STFU because he is a SRS Kaos Mage and wants you to take it more srsly, I'm sure.
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: LMNO on March 28, 2008, 08:42:50 PM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v711/Marburger/STFU/STFURambo.jpg)
Title: Re: The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Ninja Turtle
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on March 31, 2008, 10:16:22 AM
This ritual is Paria-approved mumbo jumbo!

Tested it on a cat familiar and it worked :lulz: