Here is the last time I ranted, for those of you seeking some toxicity. It was written hastily but I believe my point got across.
It was written in October '08 if you want a frame of reference. The quote at the end is from Tool, I forgot to give credit. Sure, I could change that right now, but I feel it would take away from the hurried, unedited sentimentality of my writing.
Here ya go:
SAVE OUR KIDS
About a year or so ago, there was a hubbub made over a series of Clearasil commercials. The commercials featured young men and women acting sexually provocative after using the product because of their new-found confidence in their appearances. I'm not sure if was Clearasil's specific commercials that were the focus or the example, as Axe, Herbal Essence, CK, and all kinds of other companies that rely on sex for a sell used similar marketing campaigns. It seemed to simply be a fix for our overly conservative media culture during a media drought. Heading the pack on my radar was notorious closet sex fiend, Bill "loofah?" O'Reilly. The complaint here seemed to be that these commercials were being played during peak programming hours, and thus "forcing" people to explain to their children what's going down on the screen. "Mommy, why is that boy winking at his teacher."
Bullshit. I immediately smelled the rank hypocrisy boiling from the mouths of the bastards who have been sent to tell me what to think. These liars, these misinformation peddlers, these fear guided, ass backward fucks had once again taken it upon themselves to tell me how I should conduct my life, with no consideration for my beliefs, my family, my fears. How do I come to this conclusion? Simple: I don't fear sex. I don't fear letting my (hypothetical) kids knowing what happens in the hearts, minds, and bodies of the adolescent, teen-age, or fully matured humans. I don't fear the tough questions that I would prefer be asked of me and not learned elsewhere. No regard is given to my fears and concerns only those of the voices on TV.
There is a credit card commercial running that I find completely offensive. I am afraid that the youth will see it and be corrupted. I would pull this commercial faster than you could say "sex talk." In this commercial, there is some sort of business lunch between some Americans and some Asians. The American man pays for his lunch with a credit card that has a picture of some generic super hero on it. The Asians talk amongst themselves, laugh, and walk away. Then the American woman says, "let me get this," and puts down her golden [God], professional looking credit card. I guess that young fella has something to learn about business. Time to grow up.
I would be less offended if a man in black face, wearing a Nazi uniform, raped a blind orphan with muscular dystrophy.
This commercial "forces" me to to have the following talk after my 8 year old asks why Asians hate superheroes(thus cementing his racist future): "Well, Vegeta, the thing is, once you get to the ripe old age of 14 or so, superheroes are seen as childish. It's not just superheroes, though. Non-approved musics, videogames, individuality, fiction, self-expression, happiness, free-thought, stuffed animals. Hell, pretty much all toys. By the time you're in college you're expected to call your mini-van and word processing programs "toys". If you have any interest in things that are outside of the acceptable, you will be ridiculed and written off. Honestly, you may as well not even bother developing a personality. One will be given to you after your first tour in college."
I fear conformity for the sake of conformity. I fear the unimaginitive. I fear the banal and the boring. Where is the media now? Why isn't Bill "yeah, it's called a loofah" looking out for me? The future is being poisoned by these immoral bastards, lets do something!
No help for me... My concerns aren't important. They aren't valid. These are the ranting of the childish. Please. Look at how "grown-ups" have driven this planet, and this country right into the fucking ground. Give me the superhero guy, keep your precious "maturity."
"I'm praying for rain, I'm praying for tidal waves..."
Quote from: hunter s.durden on March 11, 2009, 12:39:07 AM
I would be less offended if a man in black face, wearing a Nazi uniform, raped a blind orphan with muscular dystrophy.
:lulz:
I haven't read the rant, but just skimmed
though this line is making me giggle uncontrollably and I have to go print an essay at the PUBLIC library\
Thanks a lot, bastard
Welcome back, you Glorious Faggot!
Niiice. :mittens:, not (just) because I've missed you, but I think this was pretty fucking right on.
:lulz: This was fucking excellent, and horrifyingly spot-on. Also why I stopped watching TV.
I remember those bullshit ads. Well-written rant.
Fuck you, Hunter.
You nailed it. "Daddy, why is having fun bad?"
:mittens::hi5::mittens:
This was out of the park Hunter.
Goddamnit, what the fuck is this shit clogging up the forum?!
Oh... it's HUNTER!!!
Hey you old reprobate, that was a fan-fucking-tastic rant. 100% TROOFINESS
:mittens:
That was pure awesomeness!!!
Great to see you!!
Damn I've missed this mofo.
I'm now going to run outside and have throbbing ghey buttsecks with the first man I see, in Hunter's honour.
:mittens:
Thanks all. It's a shame that all of my rants and writings are inspired by advertisement, but I'm becoming comfortable with it. I have a new TV obsessed girlfriend, and it's giving me tons of things to be mad at.
Also: Who the shit is K-Bitch?
Khara.
Also, this is a pretty sweet rant. :mittens: I remember that damned credit card commercial.
Quote from: hunter s.durden on March 11, 2009, 12:39:07 AM
No help for me... My concerns aren't important. They aren't valid. These are the ranting of the childish. Please. Look at how "grown-ups" have driven this planet, and this country right into the fucking ground. Give me the superhero guy, keep your precious "maturity."
It makes me sick, ya know? That the most boring people in the world are the norms.
It's not just the "safety" of being like everybody else, it's the xenophobic rage towards anything outside of the status quo.
It's The Machine's clockwork, tick tick tick: every time a politician has an original idea, they demonize him. Any time something actually FUN is discovered, it gets subverted by marketing hotshots. What the fuck is COOL anymore? It's this manufactured image. Shouldn't it be something we can relate to? Something other than rock stars in sunglasses? Something that doesn't have its own product line? I mean, I think that raving derelict at the park is cool, why can't I be like him? 8)
What tears me up the most is that our culture, which used to be kind of organic, is now being DETERMINED from the
top down by the forked tongue of marketing and media. Rather than culture growing naturally from the bottom up, every movement, every style, every fad is calculated for maximum sales potential. It grosses me out.
And in my neighborhood, I find my posters being torn down even though they're funny and awesome. Why? Because they don't
belong there. The message is: Art doesn't go on telephone poles, it goes in
museums, prole.
Kalle Lasn, in the book
Culture Jam, talks about how he regularly tries to buy TV spots for his Buy Nothing Day, and No TV Week projects. But they flat out won't sell him airtime because he's not selling a product, and they sense his message could damage their engine. He talks about how earlier in his career, he was just trying to get his short films put on TV, and they could have fit in a commercial slot, so why shouldn't he be allowed to buy a slot and show his reel like anyone else? I mean, if they aired youtube videos inbetween commercials, I might actually not Mute the commercials, you know? But nope - the status quo is not determined by real human beings like you and me. It's determined by bureaucracy.
Fuck that noise!I'm starting a kingdom in my living room
edited for clarity because I wrote this post then had to sprint to a train before I reread it
I agree with you, individuality is swiftly becoming a sin. As for the ads on TV, I tell my kids that Hollywood is actually run by a group of monkeys with sledgehammers.
Quote from: Saint Jello
Fun Fun Fun in the fluffy chair
Flame up the herb
Woof down the beer
[click!]
Hi
I'm your video DJ
I always talk like I'm wigged out on quaaludes
I wear a satin baseball jacket everywhere I go
My job is to help destroy
What's left of your imagination
By feeding you endless doses
Of sugar-coated mindless garbage
So don't create
Be sedate
Be a vegetable at home
And thwack on that dial
If we have our way even you will believe
This is the future of rock and roll
How far will you go
How low will you stoop
To tranquilize our minds with your sugar-coated swill
You've turned rock and roll rebellion
Into Pat Boone sedation
Making sure nothing's left to the imagination
M.T.V. Get off the
M.T.V. Get off the
M.T.V. Get off the air
Get off the air
See the latest rejects from the muppet show
Wag their tits and their dicks
As they lip-synch on screen
There's something I don't like
About a band who always smiles
Another tax write-off
For some schmuck who doesn't care
M.T.V. Get off the air
And so it was
Our beloved corporate gods
Claimed they created rock video
Allowing it to sink as low in one year
As commercial TV has in 25
"It's the new frontier," they say
It's wide open, anything can happen
But you've got a lot of nerve
To call yourself a pioneer
When you're too god-damn conservative
To take real chances.
Tin-eared
Graph-paper brained accountants
Instead of music fans
Call all the shots at giant record companies now
The lowest common denominator rules
Forget honesty
Forget creativity
The dumbest buy the mostest
That's the name of the game
But sales are slumping
And no one will say why
Could it be they put out one too many lousy records?!?
M.T.V.-Get off the air!
NOW
and now, a word from our sponsors...
http://www.mtv.com/music/artist/dead_kennedys/lyrics.jhtml (http://www.mtv.com/music/artist/dead_kennedys/lyrics.jhtml) :lulz:
MTV may very well be the worst offender.
I wish that song had a video.
Quote from: Cramulus on March 11, 2009, 08:02:29 PM
What tears me up the most is that our culture, which used to be kind of organic, is now being DETERMINED from the top down by the forked tongue of marketing and media. Rather than culture growing naturally from the bottom up, every movement, every style, every fad is calculated for maximum sales potential. It grosses me out.
This sums things up nicely.
you don't think the trend towards 'the long tail' is mitigating this effect? sure its still kinda fat at the base of the tail, but it's not like there's nowhere to escape to....
I mean, i never saw either of the two commercials you mentioned, and it's not for lack of media that i pump into my dry itchy eyes!
what do you mean by "the long tail"? that 20% of the culture gets 80% of the attention?
or is it that 20% of the culture is the frame of reference for the other 80%?
This post brought to you by Clear Eyes.
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v116/tightend91/Clear-Eyes.jpg)
Clear Eyes: It's awesome!
Those particular commercials were more examples for a larger point (which is getting overshadowed by my smaller point), than specific examples of things to rage against.
The point is the double standard, so my answer would be no, the mainstream always finds ways of offending my delicate sensibilities.
I thought i had heard the term bandied about in this forum....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Long_Tail
i just have a cursory understanding of it that i have picked up, but i'm saying that there is an increasing number of people that are diversifying into an increasing number of niches, and the technology and marketing (of products, ideas, etc. ) is making this increasingly more possible. I mean, we now are able to find blogs/forums and all the media and personal interaction they allow on reeeeeeaaaally obscure things, right? and less people (on a percentage basis) are watching the 'must see TV' because of this right? I dunno, i just see the 'forked tongue of marketing and media' to becoming so forked as to not really be dictating much anymore.... they can come to us easier than forcing us to come to them. (or am i being overly optimistic?)
I hear ya. Us fringe people didn't used to be a market - and now every subculture seems to have its own brand.
Quoteand less people (on a percentage basis) are watching the 'must see TV' because of this right?
not sure. I haven't seen any numbers.
I just took a sniff around to find out if people ARE actually watching more or less TV now, and I came across this list of the ten most watched TV events of all time (http://history.sandiego.edu/gen/recording/tv-toprated.html), and they're all in the 70s and 80s.
I think the most optimistic idea about the Long Tail is that people on the fringe become an actual demographic. But regardless, I bet 80% of the stuff in the media is still being determined by the tastes of only 20% of the consumers.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pareto_principle
Quote from: Cramulus on March 11, 2009, 10:08:52 PM
I hear ya. Us fringe people didn't used to be a market - and now every subculture seems to have its own brand.
Welcome to the Strange Times :wink:
And I didn't know that TV stations would refuse to sell you commercial airtime if you weren't selling a product. That's utter balls.
Quote from: Cramulus on March 11, 2009, 08:02:29 PM
It makes me sick, ya know? That the most boring people in the world are the norms.
It's not just the "safety" of being like everybody else, it's the xenophobic rage towards anything outside of the status quo.
:monkeydance: <--- Normal
Quote from: Cramulus on March 11, 2009, 10:08:52 PM
I think the most optimistic idea about the Long Tail is that people on the fringe become an actual demographic. But regardless, I bet 80% of the stuff in the media is still being determined by the tastes of only 20% of the consumers.
Mmmm...
The concept of 'the media' is in flux right now to our favor...
Have you shot your television lately? :wink:
Quote from: Iptuous on March 12, 2009, 02:45:19 AM
Mmmm...
The concept of 'the media' is in flux right now to our favor...
I've been saying this same thing for ages. Internets will eventually supercede everything as the delivery system for newspapers, magazines, cd's, dvd's, television .... media
The difference?
We all have a printing press, record factory, movie/tv studio and we can all get media out there. Much higher quality and much more easily than before.
Have fun pissing in the mainstream everyone, cos they aint going to be able to stop us :lulz:
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on March 12, 2009, 11:04:32 AM
Quote from: Iptuous on March 12, 2009, 02:45:19 AM
Mmmm...
The concept of 'the media' is in flux right now to our favor...
I've been saying this same thing for ages. Internets will eventually supercede everything as the delivery system for newspapers, magazines, cd's, dvd's, television .... media
The difference?
We all have a printing press, record factory, movie/tv studio and we can all get media out there. Much higher quality and much more easily than before.
Have fun pissing in the mainstream everyone, cos they aint going to be able to stop us :lulz:
I think that's the first optimistic thing i've seen you post! :D
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on March 12, 2009, 11:04:32 AM
Quote from: Iptuous on March 12, 2009, 02:45:19 AM
Mmmm...
The concept of 'the media' is in flux right now to our favor...
I've been saying this same thing for ages. Internets will eventually supercede everything as the delivery system for newspapers, magazines, cd's, dvd's, television .... media
The difference?
We all have a printing press, record factory, movie/tv studio and we can all get media out there. Much higher quality and much more easily than before.
Have fun pissing in the mainstream everyone, cos they aint going to be able to stop us :lulz:
... and then we'll all die of ass cancer
better?
normalcy returneth.
:D
Heh.
My friends are often amused by how fast i can turn the TV off when the annoying commercials start. I'll lunge, jump, run or lift furniture just to get the damn thing to stfu.
Quote from: Regret on March 16, 2009, 05:44:05 PM
Heh.
My friends are often amused by how fast i can turn the TV off when the annoying commercials start. I'll lunge, jump, run or lift furniture just to get the damn thing to stfu.
I often get questioning looks just for
muting the blasted things, let alone turning them off.
My daughter tends to watch commercial-free stations like Boomerang and Noggin. Every once in awhile we might catch an ep of Spongebob or something similar on Nickelodeon and she gets quite impatient when the commercials come on.
I prefer to blag my teevee from torrents. No ads and I get the US shows days or even weeks in advance of UK airings. M$ media server, wireless router and PS3 - my own little personal teevee service - Sky++ :ninja: