Suddenly:(http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x279/BlessedBesse/pterodactylprojectedpath.png)
A volcano in south America explodes, but instead of lava, it erupts a cloud of wretched screetching prehistoric pterosaurs. They quickly fly to your town and begin lacerating / eating people.
WHAT DO YOU DO?This is sort of like planning for the Zombie Apocalypse. You need a plan in advance.
Here are some scenario details:
- Your town or city is filled with pterodactyls. There are at least three thousand of them locally.
- Other nearby towns and cities are dealing with their own prehistoric problems, so no additional help is coming.
- Even after their terrible bellies are full of blood and guts, the Pterodactyls continue to hunt, for sport
- Their beaks are so sharp they can snip off your limbs or head like scissors through a paper doll
- Pterodactyls have irregular sleep schedules. Some sleep during the day, some sleep at night.
- When resting, they tend to perch in high, easily protected places, generally the roofs of very tall buildings.
- If you can damage their wings they will be unable to fly
- Their BIKAAAW noise is connected to a lot of post-traumatic stress disorder amongst the survivors.
- Most people consider it too dangerous to go outside. If you do, a pterodactyl will smell you and attack within ten minutes. Better arm yourself before you go outside!
This Training Program (http://www.principiadiscordia.com/Adventure/index.php?title=Page_2) might be helpful.
So what do you do? How would you and your loved ones survive the SWEET MERCIFUL FUCKing?
(http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x279/BlessedBesse/overlayz/canada2.jpg)
:omg:
At first I read this thread at "Pterodactylapse". The beasts will pay for my loss of erection! :argh!:
flak cannon to get them on the ground then old faithful chainsaw for finishing them off.
Also windmills with razorwire streamers to damage those wings.
all i need is HOVER SHARK
(http://photos-d.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v4603/251/59/5523151/n5523151_39871683_63797.jpg)
Well I'm in an office right now, but there are a lot of windows. So I'm not sure that I'd be safe indoors. Luckily I am a notorious office packrat, and have like six pairs of scissors in my desk. So I'd grab two pairs of scissors and make my way towards the center of my floor, where there are the least windows. I guess I'd hole up inside the breakroom --- ooh, there are knives there! Big ones!
So I'd grab that knife and then take the stairs down to the street. I'd want to get out of white plains as quickly as possible, and the notion of being stuck inside an office building with my coworkers sounds like an entirely different kind of end-of-the-world scenario.
But the thing is, I don't know if the train station is the best place to go... Maybe I could hop a bus home?
assuming I get home okay, I'll still have a food problem. But I will have a crossbow and a suit of plate mail. So if pterodactyls are edible, I might be able to survive off of them for a while.
Quote from: Cramulus on May 28, 2009, 03:29:45 PM
But I will have a crossbow and a suit of plate mail.
Justification for LARPing, ITT.
I arm myself with North Korean Stinger missile replicas, a vibrant purple pimp suit and giant hat (to scare them away with), and single handedly decide to destroy their nest.
I'd stay inside and watch So You Think You Can Dance.
I know where my hat is. I have half of what I'd need in my bag, the rest around me. More specialized tools and armor are available if I can get home. Sounds like fun!
I just turn to page 101
Everyone knows page 101 is where the good ending is
"We're not Worthy. We're not Worthy."
/
*lol* *lol* *lol* *lol* *lol*
[checking font size]
good tools for fighting off pterodactyls:
(http://www.distantcreations.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/gadget2.jpg)
(http://northkeep.ansteorra.org/graphics/spear.gif)
bad tools for fighting off pterodactyls:
(http://savecapitalism.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/bear-trap1.jpg)
(http://inspector-gadget.net/wp-content/gallery/go-go-gadget-gallery/Gadget%20Coat.jpg)
Quote from: Cramulus on May 28, 2009, 07:54:21 PM
(http://northkeep.ansteorra.org/graphics/spear.gif)
Mine lives next to the door of my bedroom. :D
(http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a139/ThornIs/meteor-dinosaur-impact.jpg)
What about this?
It does pretty well too.
troof, pterodactyls fucking hate broken image links
Quote from: Cramulus on May 28, 2009, 07:58:47 PM
troof, pterodactyls fucking hate broken image links
fixed
oh great i gotta get me one of these now..(http://media.techeblog.com/images/giantlarge_7.jpg)
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/feature-world-s-largest-shotgun-with-video-demonstration- watch the video
Can't see video from work, but that's a Punt Gun. You mount them on small boats for wiping out whole flocks of game fowl at once.
Quote from: Richter on May 28, 2009, 08:41:43 PM
Can't see video from work, but that's a Punt Gun. You mount them on small boats for wiping out whole flocks of game fowl at once.
yes a punt gun, picture large scale destruction of a rack with hundreds of skeet at once..,
I'm at home. 2nd floor. There are big windows here, so I'll turn off the lights first (it's dark outside right now). I figure if they can't see me, they have no reason to risk cutting their wings on broken glass.
I live 200ft from a big hospital. Right across the road. I'm not sure what to make of it, I absolutely despise the place, it's a brooding shithole of bureaucracy. But they do have a helicopter ... I wonder how useful a helicopter is against pterodactyls however.
They do have a lot of useful things in the hospital. But at first they're probably all busy keeping all the patients alive and shit. Which is doomed to fail, because no help is coming. Maybe I can manage to cross the road and offer to help out at the hospital (actually help out--it's not like anybody is going to want websites any time soon so I might as well make myself useful), but meanwhile biding my time and gaining the trust of the medical crew there, making friends there is probably really useful.
If there's any chance, even just half a minute without pterodactyls in sight, I'll pull my bike inside, cause it's right next to the door and don't want anyone taking it or pterodactyls pooping on it and it means I can keep it unlocked and ready for action instead of the crappy lock that sometimes has me fiddling for half a minute before I get it loose.
considering food. for some reason I have just acquired nearly 4lb of dried chick peas. I believe they are fairly nutricious, so that should last me quite a while. I will consume my perishables first, of course. I also have about 40-50 multi vitamin pills left.
I have quite a bunch of empty soda bottles, which I will rinse shortly and start to fill with tap water immediately. With some bad luck the water system can be one of the first to go (or become polluted), maybe within the hour. so I collect as much water as I can first, and if electricity and water system permit, I will then continue for a second pass of actually cleaning and properly disinfecting the bottles using boiling water from my electric waterboiler, before re-filling them with cold water.
As long as there's electricity and internet, I will check Twitter for the latest updates. I will get in touch with my gf (who is in Germany fighting brontosaurs) and my family (various places in the Netherlands, but at least none of them seem to be up against Raptors). I will check my book collection for survival guides and download one of necessary. I will also get the "print page" version of the CRAZY PREPARED thread for reference. I just notice I have a printer. I will connect it and start printing useful docs as long as electricity allows. As soon as the power goes, so will the internet and I will close my laptop, saving its batteries until I can think of the most useful thing to do with it. On its most economic setting, it can last at least three hours on a fully charged battery.
There are large gardening tools in the shed in the backyard that might make decent weapons. If I can get a chance I will try and collect them.
There are two rooms in this house filled to the brim with old random stuff that belongs to my aunt. Who knows what could be in there.
I realize I probably don't stand much of a chance to actually take on a pterodactyl and kill it. I think. How big are these things, anyway?
Pterodactyls are good with ketchup.
Luckily, I have a lot of ammo. I take to lurking in the doorway hoping to lure one close enough to shoot, and then dragging it in the house and butchering it for food.
They taste a lot like chicken.
Eventually, I die of malnutrition.
I would play a continuous loop of shooped soundbites of Tyra Banks (I could have sworn there was a past thread in which the pterodactyls fucking loved Tyra Banks) telling them to avoid this particular house.
If I'm at my apartment then I am completely and utterly fucked. I'm on the ground floor but I have too many windows to do my any good.
If I'm at work then I'm more than safe. My lab is at least 4 layers of concrete away from the outside world. The generator has enough juice to last me for awhile. There is enough food in vending machines to last me about a month with rationing. If they do somehow get in through the roof there are enough metallic and wood implements to use as weapons. Maintenance shop has some nice power tools plus a belt sander to help sharpen everything up. I've got energy drinks as far as the eye can see so I'm ready to throw down!
It's dark. Oh God, it's dark. They cut the power lines to the building five hours ago, and trapped us here on the 33rd story when the elevators stopped working. A handful of co-workers said they were going to take the stairs, and we haven't heard anything from them since except a single phone call from Sheila, which lasted all of thirty seconds. She was crying; then a muffled, "no..." Then silence.
Huddled in the center of the floor, we peeked around our cubicles while the sun went down. We could see them circling the building, searching. Massive shadows passed back and forth as their wings blotted out the sun. Half an hour after sunset, there was an explosion from down on the street, and the lights went out. Henry started screaming; that was all they needed. They could hear him through the plate glass windows. We watched with horror as one of them slammed headfirst into the building, sending shards of glass flying everywhere. Most of us ran, but some were frozen to the spot as they saw another one following close behind the first, its horrible mouth opening to reveal rows and rows of jagged teeth. For some, that was the last thing they saw.
I ran for the stairs, slamming the fire door behind me, and ran up to the floor above. I didn't know what Sheila and the others had found, but I wanted no part of it. Running down the hall towards the executive suite, I glanced to the side, out the window. The moon was just a sliver, but I could see dozens of monstrous shapes gliding by. Somewhere, I could hear screaming. I dove through the door of the suite, and slammed it behind me. I crawled to the large oak desk, and curled up beneath it, trying to clam my heartbeat. I waited.
It's cold. I'm hungry. I have no idea what's going on outside. I chose the suite because it's one of the only rooms that don't have windows to the outside, but while they can't see me, I can't see them, either.
Wait. I think I hear something. Awkward footsteps, something being dragged along the carpet in the hallway outside. A heavy thump right outside. OH SWEET GOD THEY HAVE THUMBS THEY CAN OPEN DOORS—
Quote from: Broken AI on May 29, 2009, 09:52:55 AM
cmon gaiz.
make dactyl love.
not war!
The damned pterodactyl was right behind me... I knew I could never get away from it, not with the distance I still had to make to the door of my house. My back prickled as I sensed it swooping closer, and I wheeled around in desperation, ready to fight to the last with my bare hands. But why wasn't the cursed beast attacking me already? Instead, it had landed, and was prancing a bit awkwardly and making a strange creeling call. Mesmerized, I could only stand and watch its hypnotic dance and the bobbing of its head as it pranced ever closer. It wasn't until it was nearly upon me, wings spread, that I noticed it was a male.
It pinned me every so carefully up against the side of my garage, and I was stunned by the heat and urgency with which it was rubbing its firm, satiny body against me, until I could feel the throb and swell of its penis growing erect. Unbidden, I felt in myself a matching heat spreading from my loins, and for the first time I realized what was about to happen... so wrong! But I had no choice. The razor-sharp beak of the wicked animal clacked softly, only inches from my ear. And, I realized with a thrill of the forbidden, I
wanted it! I wanted to feel its hot pterodactyl prod inside me. I caressed the beast, tentatively at first, running my hands over its dry, slightly velvety hide, and it responded with increased enthusiasm. I reached down and grasped its hard, wet, and slightly prehensile erection, and it let out a soft "creeeeeel" in my ear. I slid to my knees and breathed hard against the silky membranous skin for a moment, letting the rich aroma of pterosaur musk drift to my brain.
I let the head slip into my mouth and press against my tongue, melting into the heat and instinct of sucking. I caressed the base of its tail while pulling
it in as deep as it could, pressing my nose into the beast's skin, sliding my tight-kissed mouth up and down his length, slowing and quickening with the rhythm of his clacking, and his wing-claws on my shoulders and in my hair. I felt the throb and beat of his blood and the flexing of his haunches as my pterodactyl lover went weak-legged against me, and I held him close with one arm, keeping him tight to my face while with the other hand I stripped off my button-front dress to press my sex-wakened breasts against his knobby little knees. I pulled off his beast-organ with a wet little "pop" and edged myself to my back, and the creature fell atop me, eagerly thrusting. I pulled my soaking panties down to offer my wet pussy to his ready pterodactylhood, and he entered me, plunging deeply with a reverberating screech. I answered his cries with my own wails of ecstasy, as he bucked and thrust into me, his prehensile penis bringing me to the brink of prehistoric bliss in our unholy, unnatural, and anachronistic coupling. Finally, in a crescendo of clacking and creeling, my new master pulled out of me and I spasmed into orgasm as I watched his hot custard-colored lizard cream rocket forth and cover my tits with pungent Mesozoic cum.
I no longer fear the pterodactyls, as I have learned that their blood-thirst can be quenched... with good good loving.
"his ready pterodactylhood"
:lulz:
:banana:
notice them on primevil and some scifi movie that wasnt the one below
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0452668/
OMFG.
Nigel.
You have truly redefined "Sweet merciful fuck, pterodactyls!" for me.
Nigel, :mittens:
:thanks:
primeval season 1 ep 5
had http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anurognathus
sorry for the mixup
Nigel, I came. Everywhere! :fap: :fap: :fap:
:lulz: The concept of anyone actually, authentically, getting off on pterodactyl porn is HILARIOUS.
Quote from: Nigel on June 02, 2009, 08:17:59 PM
:lulz: The concept of anyone actually, authentically, getting off on pterodactyl porn is HILARIOUS.
And unbelievably, amazingly, jaw droppingly hot. :fap:
Maybe it's just your writing, I dunno.
nsfw repost
pterodactyl pr0n gif, for those that haven't seen it (http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x279/BlessedBesse/bin/that_infamous_pterodactyl_gif.gif)
:lulz: I never saw the .gif for that.
The dude flapping his wings is hilarious!
Quote from: The Borderline Simpleton on June 02, 2009, 09:51:26 PM
Quote from: Nigel on June 02, 2009, 08:17:59 PM
:lulz: The concept of anyone actually, authentically, getting off on pterodactyl porn is HILARIOUS.
And unbelievably, amazingly, jaw droppingly hot. :fap:
Maybe it's just your writing, I dunno.
:thanks:
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/ptero
I'd be fine cause i have this!!!
(http://i.imgur.com/y7vtx.jpg)
Quote from: Nigel on May 29, 2009, 08:43:26 PM
Quote from: Broken AI on May 29, 2009, 09:52:55 AM
cmon gaiz.
make dactyl love.
not war!
The damned pterodactyl was right behind me... I knew I could never get away from it, not with the distance I still had to make to the door of my house. My back prickled as I sensed it swooping closer, and I wheeled around in desperation, ready to fight to the last with my bare hands. But why wasn't the cursed beast attacking me already? Instead, it had landed, and was prancing a bit awkwardly and making a strange creeling call. Mesmerized, I could only stand and watch its hypnotic dance and the bobbing of its head as it pranced ever closer. It wasn't until it was nearly upon me, wings spread, that I noticed it was a male.
It pinned me every so carefully up against the side of my garage, and I was stunned by the heat and urgency with which it was rubbing its firm, satiny body against me, until I could feel the throb and swell of its penis growing erect. Unbidden, I felt in myself a matching heat spreading from my loins, and for the first time I realized what was about to happen... so wrong! But I had no choice. The razor-sharp beak of the wicked animal clacked softly, only inches from my ear. And, I realized with a thrill of the forbidden, I wanted it! I wanted to feel its hot pterodactyl prod inside me. I caressed the beast, tentatively at first, running my hands over its dry, slightly velvety hide, and it responded with increased enthusiasm. I reached down and grasped its hard, wet, and slightly prehensile erection, and it let out a soft "creeeeeel" in my ear. I slid to my knees and breathed hard against the silky membranous skin for a moment, letting the rich aroma of pterosaur musk drift to my brain.
I let the head slip into my mouth and press against my tongue, melting into the heat and instinct of sucking. I caressed the base of its tail while pulling
it in as deep as it could, pressing my nose into the beast's skin, sliding my tight-kissed mouth up and down his length, slowing and quickening with the rhythm of his clacking, and his wing-claws on my shoulders and in my hair. I felt the throb and beat of his blood and the flexing of his haunches as my pterodactyl lover went weak-legged against me, and I held him close with one arm, keeping him tight to my face while with the other hand I stripped off my button-front dress to press my sex-wakened breasts against his knobby little knees. I pulled off his beast-organ with a wet little "pop" and edged myself to my back, and the creature fell atop me, eagerly thrusting. I pulled my soaking panties down to offer my wet pussy to his ready pterodactylhood, and he entered me, plunging deeply with a reverberating screech. I answered his cries with my own wails of ecstasy, as he bucked and thrust into me, his prehensile penis bringing me to the brink of prehistoric bliss in our unholy, unnatural, and anachronistic coupling. Finally, in a crescendo of clacking and creeling, my new master pulled out of me and I spasmed into orgasm as I watched his hot custard-colored lizard cream rocket forth and cover my tits with pungent Mesozoic cum.
I no longer fear the pterodactyls, as I have learned that their blood-thirst can be quenched... with good good loving.
Bump
Quote from: Nigel on August 11, 2011, 07:59:30 PM
Quote from: Nigel on May 29, 2009, 08:43:26 PM
Quote from: Broken AI on May 29, 2009, 09:52:55 AM
cmon gaiz.
make dactyl love.
not war!
The damned pterodactyl was right behind me... I knew I could never get away from it, not with the distance I still had to make to the door of my house. My back prickled as I sensed it swooping closer, and I wheeled around in desperation, ready to fight to the last with my bare hands. But why wasn't the cursed beast attacking me already? Instead, it had landed, and was prancing a bit awkwardly and making a strange creeling call. Mesmerized, I could only stand and watch its hypnotic dance and the bobbing of its head as it pranced ever closer. It wasn't until it was nearly upon me, wings spread, that I noticed it was a male.
It pinned me every so carefully up against the side of my garage, and I was stunned by the heat and urgency with which it was rubbing its firm, satiny body against me, until I could feel the throb and swell of its penis growing erect. Unbidden, I felt in myself a matching heat spreading from my loins, and for the first time I realized what was about to happen... so wrong! But I had no choice. The razor-sharp beak of the wicked animal clacked softly, only inches from my ear. And, I realized with a thrill of the forbidden, I wanted it! I wanted to feel its hot pterodactyl prod inside me. I caressed the beast, tentatively at first, running my hands over its dry, slightly velvety hide, and it responded with increased enthusiasm. I reached down and grasped its hard, wet, and slightly prehensile erection, and it let out a soft "creeeeeel" in my ear. I slid to my knees and breathed hard against the silky membranous skin for a moment, letting the rich aroma of pterosaur musk drift to my brain.
I let the head slip into my mouth and press against my tongue, melting into the heat and instinct of sucking. I caressed the base of its tail while pulling
it in as deep as it could, pressing my nose into the beast's skin, sliding my tight-kissed mouth up and down his length, slowing and quickening with the rhythm of his clacking, and his wing-claws on my shoulders and in my hair. I felt the throb and beat of his blood and the flexing of his haunches as my pterodactyl lover went weak-legged against me, and I held him close with one arm, keeping him tight to my face while with the other hand I stripped off my button-front dress to press my sex-wakened breasts against his knobby little knees. I pulled off his beast-organ with a wet little "pop" and edged myself to my back, and the creature fell atop me, eagerly thrusting. I pulled my soaking panties down to offer my wet pussy to his ready pterodactylhood, and he entered me, plunging deeply with a reverberating screech. I answered his cries with my own wails of ecstasy, as he bucked and thrust into me, his prehensile penis bringing me to the brink of prehistoric bliss in our unholy, unnatural, and anachronistic coupling. Finally, in a crescendo of clacking and creeling, my new master pulled out of me and I spasmed into orgasm as I watched his hot custard-colored lizard cream rocket forth and cover my tits with pungent Mesozoic cum.
I no longer fear the pterodactyls, as I have learned that their blood-thirst can be quenched... with good good loving.
Bump
:lulz: This is magnificent. :mittens:
(http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n262/telarus/safari/wotwot02.png)
Quote from: Nigel on May 29, 2009, 08:43:26 PM
Quote from: Broken AI on May 29, 2009, 09:52:55 AM
cmon gaiz.
make dactyl love.
not war!
The damned pterodactyl was right behind me... I knew I could never get away from it, not with the distance I still had to make to the door of my house. My back prickled as I sensed it swooping closer, and I wheeled around in desperation, ready to fight to the last with my bare hands. But why wasn't the cursed beast attacking me already? Instead, it had landed, and was prancing a bit awkwardly and making a strange creeling call. Mesmerized, I could only stand and watch its hypnotic dance and the bobbing of its head as it pranced ever closer. It wasn't until it was nearly upon me, wings spread, that I noticed it was a male.
It pinned me every so carefully up against the side of my garage, and I was stunned by the heat and urgency with which it was rubbing its firm, satiny body against me, until I could feel the throb and swell of its penis growing erect. Unbidden, I felt in myself a matching heat spreading from my loins, and for the first time I realized what was about to happen... so wrong! But I had no choice. The razor-sharp beak of the wicked animal clacked softly, only inches from my ear. And, I realized with a thrill of the forbidden, I wanted it! I wanted to feel its hot pterodactyl prod inside me. I caressed the beast, tentatively at first, running my hands over its dry, slightly velvety hide, and it responded with increased enthusiasm. I reached down and grasped its hard, wet, and slightly prehensile erection, and it let out a soft "creeeeeel" in my ear. I slid to my knees and breathed hard against the silky membranous skin for a moment, letting the rich aroma of pterosaur musk drift to my brain.
I let the head slip into my mouth and press against my tongue, melting into the heat and instinct of sucking. I caressed the base of its tail while pulling
it in as deep as it could, pressing my nose into the beast's skin, sliding my tight-kissed mouth up and down his length, slowing and quickening with the rhythm of his clacking, and his wing-claws on my shoulders and in my hair. I felt the throb and beat of his blood and the flexing of his haunches as my pterodactyl lover went weak-legged against me, and I held him close with one arm, keeping him tight to my face while with the other hand I stripped off my button-front dress to press my sex-wakened breasts against his knobby little knees. I pulled off his beast-organ with a wet little "pop" and edged myself to my back, and the creature fell atop me, eagerly thrusting. I pulled my soaking panties down to offer my wet pussy to his ready pterodactylhood, and he entered me, plunging deeply with a reverberating screech. I answered his cries with my own wails of ecstasy, as he bucked and thrust into me, his prehensile penis bringing me to the brink of prehistoric bliss in our unholy, unnatural, and anachronistic coupling. Finally, in a crescendo of clacking and creeling, my new master pulled out of me and I spasmed into orgasm as I watched his hot custard-colored lizard cream rocket forth and cover my tits with pungent Mesozoic cum.
I no longer fear the pterodactyls, as I have learned that their blood-thirst can be quenched... with good good loving.
:mittens::1fap:
Quote from: Nigel on May 29, 2009, 08:43:26 PM
Quote from: Broken AI on May 29, 2009, 09:52:55 AM
cmon gaiz.
make dactyl love.
not war!
The damned pterodactyl was right behind me... I knew I could never get away from it, not with the distance I still had to make to the door of my house. My back prickled as I sensed it swooping closer, and I wheeled around in desperation, ready to fight to the last with my bare hands. But why wasn't the cursed beast attacking me already? Instead, it had landed, and was prancing a bit awkwardly and making a strange creeling call. Mesmerized, I could only stand and watch its hypnotic dance and the bobbing of its head as it pranced ever closer. It wasn't until it was nearly upon me, wings spread, that I noticed it was a male.
It pinned me every so carefully up against the side of my garage, and I was stunned by the heat and urgency with which it was rubbing its firm, satiny body against me, until I could feel the throb and swell of its penis growing erect. Unbidden, I felt in myself a matching heat spreading from my loins, and for the first time I realized what was about to happen... so wrong! But I had no choice. The razor-sharp beak of the wicked animal clacked softly, only inches from my ear. And, I realized with a thrill of the forbidden, I wanted it! I wanted to feel its hot pterodactyl prod inside me. I caressed the beast, tentatively at first, running my hands over its dry, slightly velvety hide, and it responded with increased enthusiasm. I reached down and grasped its hard, wet, and slightly prehensile erection, and it let out a soft "creeeeeel" in my ear. I slid to my knees and breathed hard against the silky membranous skin for a moment, letting the rich aroma of pterosaur musk drift to my brain.
I let the head slip into my mouth and press against my tongue, melting into the heat and instinct of sucking. I caressed the base of its tail while pulling
it in as deep as it could, pressing my nose into the beast's skin, sliding my tight-kissed mouth up and down his length, slowing and quickening with the rhythm of his clacking, and his wing-claws on my shoulders and in my hair. I felt the throb and beat of his blood and the flexing of his haunches as my pterodactyl lover went weak-legged against me, and I held him close with one arm, keeping him tight to my face while with the other hand I stripped off my button-front dress to press my sex-wakened breasts against his knobby little knees. I pulled off his beast-organ with a wet little "pop" and edged myself to my back, and the creature fell atop me, eagerly thrusting. I pulled my soaking panties down to offer my wet pussy to his ready pterodactylhood, and he entered me, plunging deeply with a reverberating screech. I answered his cries with my own wails of ecstasy, as he bucked and thrust into me, his prehensile penis bringing me to the brink of prehistoric bliss in our unholy, unnatural, and anachronistic coupling. Finally, in a crescendo of clacking and creeling, my new master pulled out of me and I spasmed into orgasm as I watched his hot custard-colored lizard cream rocket forth and cover my tits with pungent Mesozoic cum.
I no longer fear the pterodactyls, as I have learned that their blood-thirst can be quenched... with good good loving.
re-bumped!
There are no words. :aaa: :1fap:
:thanks:
Ba-bump.
I dont know where is the one with a bunch of BIKAWWW but i found this, i wonder if its indeed Cram who posted it:
(http://d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net/photo/ay551Gy_700b_v2.jpg)
source: http://9gag.com/gag/ay551Gy
The ex and I went to the MNS and I saw some cast replica skeletons...
Unfortunately I was having a horrible panic attack and I was desperately trying and failing to find the exit.
...Which would have been an appropriate response to the originals...
Consider, though, the beak and wing shape.
You know what that reminds me of the most? Pelicans.
Especially that big-assed beak.
(http://www.sott.net/image/image/s2/45529/full/pteranodon_color.jpg)
(http://weiw.lightshedder.com/Landscape-Wildlife/San-Diego-2011/IMG1156/1204018315_8rbrf-M.jpg)
I note the artists mostly depict it neck out...I *doubt* it. Unless the fossils were laid down in that position...
The majority of shorebirds/seabirds/marshbirds fly with a retracted neck, and in postmortem rigor, their necks collapse into an "S" shape.
...As far as I know, the area in Texas where the fossils were found was a large shallow sea at the time when said fossils would have been deposited.
Some of those pillarlike mesas you see in west Texas look like that b/c they were once coral reefs.
Presumably they would use the ground effect to fly low over the water, like pelicans, and this Soviet plane here:
(http://englishrussia.com/images/ekranoplan/2.jpg)
(Freaky looking plane found at: http://inventorspot.com/articles/plane_flies_inches_over_water_5661 )
Land raptors don't have that big head or vulnerable neck, they use their feet as striking weapons:
(http://new.newfillmore.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/patch_with_gopher.gif)
Long beaks are for piercing and snapping, but not for ripping apart animals too big to swallow.
One would therefore assume, based on the successful shape of modern birds, that these were fish eaters.
These big honkers would have flown along the shoreline like silent death, I expect.
Though I do note here that I once saw a night heron flying along with what looked like a struggling baby rabbit in its' beak.
(One of these)(http://www.floridabirdhouse.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/yellow-crown-night-heron1.jpg)
I think that is a pretty tight theory.
I've been calling pelicans pterodactyls for years. :lulz:
Quote from: Suu on June 24, 2013, 03:55:30 PM
I've been calling pelicans pterodactyls for years. :lulz:
:lol: Yeah, me too.
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on June 24, 2013, 04:22:35 PM
Quote from: Suu on June 24, 2013, 03:55:30 PM
I've been calling pelicans pterodactyls for years. :lulz:
:lol: Yeah, me too.
I've been calling them pteroOH GOD OH SWEET MERCIFUCK NO!
Hylie,
We do not EXPLAIN dinosaurs. We do not give them postmortems. We FEAR the dinosaurs, and we placate them with the living bodies of our neighbors (before our neighbors do it to us). Dinosaurs fly however the fuck they WANT to fly, and if they want to use their beaks to peel open an M1 Abrams battle tank ON THE FLY, then that's what they're going to fucking do and we DON'T FUCKING QUESTION IT. OR ELSE.
Your friend,
Martin Bormann
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 24, 2013, 08:21:58 PM
Hylie,
We do not EXPLAIN dinosaurs. We do not give them postmortems. We FEAR the dinosaurs, and we placate them with the living bodies of our neighbors (before our neighbors do it to us). Dinosaurs fly however the fuck they WANT to fly, and if they want to use their beaks to peel open an M1 Abrams battle tank ON THE FLY, then that's what they're going to fucking do and we DON'T FUCKING QUESTION IT. OR ELSE.
Your friend,
Martin Bormann
:spittake:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 24, 2013, 08:21:58 PM
Hylie,
We do not EXPLAIN dinosaurs. We do not give them postmortems. We FEAR the dinosaurs, and we placate them with the living bodies of our neighbors (before our neighbors do it to us). Dinosaurs fly however the fuck they WANT to fly, and if they want to use their beaks to peel open an M1 Abrams battle tank ON THE FLY, then that's what they're going to fucking do and we DON'T FUCKING QUESTION IT. OR ELSE.
Your friend,
Martin Bormann
:lulz:
Little known fact: Martin Bormann was the last in a legitimate line of dinosaur shamans, stretching back to the Tithonian Late Jurassic Era. Nazi Germany was nothing more than a reconstituted Dinosaur cult, that had achieved state power in the 20th century, with Bormann as it's High Priest.
More evidence, as if any was needed:
(http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/0806/nazi-dinosaurs-demotivational-poster-1214633192.jpg)
ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND Cain wins the interbutts. :lulz:
Quote from: Cain on June 25, 2013, 03:25:53 AM
Little known fact: Martin Bormann was the last in a legitimate line of dinosaur shamans, stretching back to the Tithonian Late Jurassic Era. Nazi Germany was nothing more than a reconstituted Dinosaur cult, that had achieved state power in the 20th century, with Bormann as it's High Priest.
More evidence, as if any was needed:
(http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/0806/nazi-dinosaurs-demotivational-poster-1214633192.jpg)
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: