Principia Discordia

Blarg!

Life is lived under a stoa in the garden of epicurean delights in between bouts of knocking your head against those of others...

Do not think I am going to settle for a ham and cheese sandwich. I ask you what have we done for each other, not just what have we done for eris?

Quote from: St. Trollax, ODDLife is lived under a stoa in the garden of epicurean delights in between bouts of knocking your head against those of others...

Do not think I am going to settle for a ham and cheese sandwich. I ask you what have we done for each other, not just what have we done for eris?

1.  Life is a goddamned heartless, rigged game, and 999 men out of a thousand are bastards.

2.  Pffft.  Twaddle.  Unless what you have done for each other has caused serious havoc in the machine of the Grey Monolith(tm), of what use is it?

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: St. Trollax, ODDLife is lived under a stoa in the garden of epicurean delights in between bouts of knocking your head against those of others...

Do not think I am going to settle for a ham and cheese sandwich. I ask you what have we done for each other, not just what have we done for eris?

1.  Life is a goddamned heartless, rigged game, and 999 men out of a thousand are bastards.

2.  Pffft.  Twaddle.  Unless what you have done for each other has caused serious havoc in the machine of the Grey Monolith(tm), of what use is it?

1.) I agree with you

2.) I'm not nihlist. I'm not an anarchist. I'm not an "ism" and I sure as all fucking hell ain't the walrus. You define value by what pertinence something has to your system of belief. Just like they do. Think about that. You are a utilitarian just like those bastards up on the hill. What use is life? What use is your life? If you can examine your life and find no laughter then I say your life is worthless.

3.) You can't kill the human spirit any more than you can build a monster.

Quote from: St. Trollax, ODD

2.) I'm not nihlist. I'm not an anarchist. I'm not an "ism" and I sure as all fucking hell ain't the walrus. You define value by what pertinence something has to your system of belief.

Well, welcome to the monkeyhouse.

If you seriously can't tell the difference between me and thos fuckwits on the hill, then I suggest you watch a little CSpan, and then re-read this.  The difference will become obvious.

I'm sooo sleepy that the words of this sermon are dancing around in front of my eyes.
Gonna have to check it out after a good night's sleep.
It looks like a real rip snorter, Roger.
Glad to see you're back to writing sermons again......I've missed em.

i'm perfectly happy right now, even in the knowledge that i am an indirect slave to the "Great Grey Monolith" or whatever you call it. What say thee?

So, Im sitting here at my job that manages to be wage-slavery and slackalicious at the same time... and I read this sermon and am yet not motivated to go out and drop a toothbrush down the john. Why? Not because the Good Rev's doomsaying is way outta line. No, I do honestly believe that we're one (maybe two) really bad domestic hits away from becoming a seriously Imperial society.

But I knew that already.

So what's the point Rog? I should put Purple Haze (my one-foot resin bubbler) back in the closet and do... What, exactly?

Drop toothbrushes down public toilets? I fail to see how that is going to 'enlighten' anyone. It's gonna piss off the poor shmuck who has to clean it up and fix it, and the Greyface running whichever little operation you've jaked ain't gonna become any wiser for it. You just going to suck down some money from somebody's maintenance budget and make some people angry.

Does this serve Eris' purposes? Does it promote the Eristic Principle?

I don't think so. It's *destructive disorder* and it falls under the purview of the Eristic ILLUSION. Which, IMHO, is a Bad Thing.

How does having your secretary inventory ceiling tiles help stop the coming of the Grey Monolith?

I don't see the connection.

Quote"Grandpa, what did YOU do during the revolution?"

   "Ummm...I smoked pot."

Revolution, huh? You think the American people are going to rise up in armed revolution against the Government? Not. The american people are a bunch of slack-jawed, morbidly obese, couch potatoes. And you, me, the rest of the Discordians (even us so-called ones), along with all the sepratist militia gun-nuts would probably provide less than a week's worth of entertainment/target practice for the the Military and Paramilitary Law Enforcement agencies that would be arrayed against us. But maybe you were speaking metaphorically, and you meant a revolution of ideas...

Well, chew on this: All real, lasting cultural change is either generational or bloody.

Personally, if it comes down to it, I am willing to fight for what I believe in. But I'm not inclined to get blood on my hands unless somebody else forces the issue.

As I see it, the near future of this nation holds three possibilities:

I may be a fool, but I'm holding out hope that the Thuddites are becoming dissatisfied with shrub, and can't help but notice that when he's not looking down his nose at them, he finding them new enemies or pissing off their old friends. Not that Kerry's any better, but at least the switch would be a clear signal to the government that they'd gone too far and it was time to start backpedaling. We're all still pretty much screwed, but maybe we unscrew ourselves just a bit.

On the other hand, maybe everybody's favorite turban-wearing psycho will decide that Bush is good for his cause (which he is), and maybe he'll get away with hitting us at home again this summer (which would basically be like running down Main ST waving a Four More Years! sign),in which case... Imperialism. We're all totally screwed.

Finally, maybe radical-fundie-psycho-terror guy doesn't get to hit us, but Bush wins the election anyway, in which case we continue down the slow road to stagnation, nationalism, isolationism, and authoritarianism. Again, screwed just not as quick and with more lube.

See, funny thing about our country is that the path of our future has forks built into it on fundamental levels. Those great hypocrites, the Founding Fathers, did actually know what they were doing. And come November, we'll find out which way we're headed for the next few years (Little Unscrewed, Screwed, or Totally Screwed)

But the thing is, Rog, none of these choices are up to you or me, really. Sure we can vote, but (patriotic/principle-of-the-thing arguments aside) we all know a single vote doesn't change things, elections only measure the aggragate will of the people, such as it is.

So I guess what I'm saying is... you wanna change things? you wanna alter to course of this nation's path? You want me to get off my ass and help in some way other than Fnording currency and defacing it with thought-provoking Discordian koans before returning it to circulation?

OK.

What's your game plan? By my count, we've got six months to enlighten a sufficient portion of the population and affect the outcome of the election, so that we can get rid of shrub (not gonna solve anything, really, but I'd venture to say it's a good first step).

So what are we gonna do, Rev?

I'm all for participating in a coordinated, nation-wide, bit of Jakery that will peel the scales off the eyes of the Thuddites and actually accomplish something.

But the toothbrush thing ain't it.

And I can't think of anything at the moment.

But that's probably because I smoke too much pot.


- Colonel Failure
   (recklessly stepping in front of the guy with the flamethrower)


PS - I'm not trying to give you a hard time, really, it's just I've been lurking this board for weeks, just started posting, and I was getting tired of dipping my toes in the shallow end of the pool. Felt like doing a connonball. Or maybe a belly flop. Guess that one's up to the jury. Anyway, take it personally - but not as an attack. It's a compliment that you are able to provoke a visceral reaction. But I'm sure you realize that already, right, Rev?

UP WITH COLONEL FAILURE!

Sir, you are the shit and I salute your shit.

Quote from: Phantom TrollaxUP WITH COLONEL FAILURE!

Sir, you are the shit and I salute your shit.

quite. You know much that is hidden. excellent retort. Should bring out the best in Roger as well.

Quote from: Efrim

Quote from: Phantom TrollaxUP WITH COLONEL FAILURE!

Sir, you are the shit and I salute your shit.

quite. You know much that is hidden. excellent retort. Should bring out the best in Roger as well.

Yeah.... that's what I'm afraid of...  :?

Quote from: Colonel Failure

Quote from: Efrim

Quote from: Phantom TrollaxUP WITH COLONEL FAILURE!

Sir, you are the shit and I salute your shit.

quite. You know much that is hidden. excellent retort. Should bring out the best in Roger as well.

Yeah.... that's what I'm afraid of...  :?

As you damn well should be...

I'm kinda looking forward to listening to the two of you.
This is going to be very interesting.

Actually Colonel, I'm so impressed with your critque of Roger that I would consider it a favor if you took a look at my latest rant, the manifesto one.

I just did, actually... and my very first thought was Hail Yes!

I'm mulling over a reply, which I'll probably put up before I go to lunch (around 4pm est). But I like it.  :)

Quote from: Colonel FailureI just did, actually... and my very first thought was Hail Yes!

I'm mulling over a reply, which I'll probably put up before I go to lunch (around 4pm est). But I like it.  :)

glad to hear it.

Quote from: Slartibartfasti'm perfectly happy right now, even in the knowledge that i am an indirect slave to the "Great Grey Monolith" or whatever you call it. What say thee?

I say "Welcome to the monkeyhouse".

Happiness is easy.  FREEDOM is hard.

Quote from: Colonel FailureSo what's the point Rog? I should put Purple Haze (my one-foot resin bubbler) back in the closet and do... What, exactly?

Quote"Grandpa, what did YOU do during the revolution?"

   "Ummm...I smoked pot."

Revolution, huh? You think the American people are going to rise up in armed revolution against the Government?

I may be a fool, but I'm holding out hope that the Thuddites are becoming dissatisfied with shrub,
What's your game plan? By my count, we've got six months to enlighten a sufficient portion of the population and affect the outcome of the election, so that we can get rid of shrub (not gonna solve anything, really, but I'd venture to say it's a good first step).

So what are we gonna do, Rev?

I'm all for participating in a coordinated, nation-wide, bit of Jakery that will peel the scales off the eyes of the Thuddites and actually accomplish something.

- Colonel Failure
   (recklessly stepping in front of the guy with the flamethrower)


PS - I'm not trying to give you a hard time, really, it's just I've been lurking this board for weeks, just started posting, and I was getting tired of dipping my toes in the shallow end of the pool. Felt like doing a connonball. Or maybe a belly flop. Guess that one's up to the jury. Anyway, take it personally - but not as an attack. It's a compliment that you are able to provoke a visceral reaction. But I'm sure you realize that already, right, Rev?

1.  I COULD tell you what to do, but then you'd be no better off than you are now.

2.  No, the American public will never revolt...as long as the TV works.

3.  Shrub isn't the problem.  He's just the spokesman.

4.  Walk before you run.  Jakery is a fine start.

5.  Good.

Quote from: Colonel Failure

Quote from: Efrim

Quote from: Phantom TrollaxUP WITH COLONEL FAILURE!

Sir, you are the shit and I salute your shit.

quite. You know much that is hidden. excellent retort. Should bring out the best in Roger as well.

Yeah.... that's what I'm afraid of...  :?

Afraid of what?  You think that *I* am going to attack someone for DISAGREEING with me?

Do I look like Jim Jones?

Quote5. Good.

(Nods, humbled by this minor note of approval from the resident 800-lb guerrilla)

Quote4. Walk before you run. Jakery is a fine start.

I'll carry on with the fnording currency thing then, till something else occurs to me...

Quote3. Shrub isn't the problem. He's just the spokesman.

Ugh, I know, I know... But I do think that a repudiation of all that he stands for (via an election defeat) would be a cathartic and healthy thing for this country. My lingering doubt is that the electorate really does have a talent for ignoring the obvious. Here's a guy that freely admits that he doesn't think about why he makes the decisions he makes, and a lot of the cabbages think not only is this a fine quality to have in a chief executive, but he's the second coming or something. I know: people are stupid. But sometimes I cant help but think, they can't ALL be THAT stupid, can they?

They always seem to prove that they can...

Quote2. No, the American public will never revolt...as long as the TV works.

Yeah. One of the many, many reasons why I stopped watching TV years ago. (Though I did go out and get both seasons of 24 on dvd... and I'm waiting for season 3... AND I DON"T WANNA SEE NO SPOILERS IN THIS THREAD PEOPLE OR SO HELP ME WHEN I GET MY TANK OUT OF THE SHOP...) Anyway, I think we're in total agreement on this point.

Quote1. I COULD tell you what to do, but then you'd be no better off than you are now.

Touche'.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Colonel Failure

Quote from: Efrim

Quote from: Phantom TrollaxUP WITH COLONEL FAILURE!

Sir, you are the shit and I salute your shit.

quite. You know much that is hidden. excellent retort. Should bring out the best in Roger as well.

Yeah.... that's what I'm afraid of...  :?

Afraid of what?  You think that *I* am going to attack someone for DISAGREEING with me?

Do I look like Jim Jones?

Were you taking me seriously Rog? You know what the PD has to say about believing what you read...

I was just paying homage to your fearsome reputation, which has preceeded you.

Or something like that.

And no, you look like BOB.

Quote from: Colonel Failure

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Colonel Failure

Quote from: Efrim

Quote from: Phantom TrollaxUP WITH COLONEL FAILURE!

Sir, you are the shit and I salute your shit.

quite. You know much that is hidden. excellent retort. Should bring out the best in Roger as well.

Yeah.... that's what I'm afraid of...  :?

Afraid of what?  You think that *I* am going to attack someone for DISAGREEING with me?

Do I look like Jim Jones?

Were you taking me seriously Rog? You know what the PD has to say about believing what you read...

I was just paying homage to your fearsome reputation, which has preceeded you.

Or something like that.

And no, you look like BOB.

Heh.  Reputations are like Fox News.  Always flashy, rarely accurate.

And I don't look like "Bob".  I look like this:

(http://www.sssbella.com/PHOTO017.bmp)

*bonks head on ceiling*

hey i look liek that too! perhaps teh good reverend and i are of relation?

how convenient for you! for great justice turn off that face!

disregard the last post, all i saw was a blank white area and assumed you were incorporeal and exsiting in all points simulataneously, making it hard for light to refract from your surface as is the case in my er case as it were. seems to me were not even the same species. how bizarre...

Quote from: horabhey i look liek that too! perhaps teh good reverend and i are of relation?

how convenient for you! for great justice turn off that face!

You have no chance.  Make your time.

Um yeah... the non-corporeal one's comments aside...

QuoteHeh. Reputations are like Fox News. Always flashy, rarely accurate.

So I am to assume that you're a harmless, earnest, good-natured country preacher with a heart of gold, then?

8)


Thought not.



And watch those low ceilings, man... it's the only brain you've got.

(Unless you're keeping your ex-roommates in a jar on a shelf in your hall closet, you know... in case you need an emergency brain...)

Quote from: Colonel FailureUm yeah... the non-corporeal one's comments aside...

QuoteHeh. Reputations are like Fox News. Always flashy, rarely accurate.

So I am to assume that you're a harmless, earnest, good-natured country preacher with a heart of gold, then?

8)


Thought not.



And watch those low ceilings, man... it's the only brain you've got.

(Unless you're keeping your ex-roommates in a jar on a shelf in your hall closet, you know... in case you need an emergency brain...)

1.  I am mostly harmless.

2.  No brain, no effect.

He's one of my zombie horde.....we've got an almost endless supply of brains ya know.

Quote from: horabdisregard the last post, all i saw was a blank white area and assumed you were incorporeal and exsiting in all points simulataneously, making it hard for light to refract from your surface as is the case in my er case as it were. seems to me were not even the same species. how bizarre...

Course not.  I'm a Zombie(tm).

Quote from: Colonel FailureUm yeah... the non-corporeal one's comments aside...

d00d! didn't j00 get the memo? my comments are never aside but rather moire or less in the front and middle with soem radomization in the placement for that "just left anywhere" look.

in any case, if the good reverend's reputation does indeed proceed him, then perhaps he should look into enlargeification in order to proceed his reputation before it gets out of hand. 9/10 reputable persons agree that i have no idea what this thread is about.

Quote from: The Rev1. I am mostly harmless.

Mostly.

Quote from: BellaHe's one of my zombie horde.....we've got an almost endless supply of brains ya know.

Oh.

That explains much.

Quote from: horab

Quote from: Colonel FailureUm yeah... the non-corporeal one's comments aside...

d00d! didn't j00 get the memo? my comments are never aside but rather moire or less in the front and middle with soem radomization in the placement for that "just left anywhere" look.

in any case, if the good reverend's reputation does indeed proceed him, then perhaps he should look into enlargeification in order to proceed his reputation before it gets out of hand. 9/10 reputable persons agree that i have no idea what this thread is about.

Must have missed that memo, along with the one about the new cover sheets on the TPS reports...

But are you sure about that 9/10 figure, cause I was thinking more than 90% of reputable people should have no clue what's going on here...

i disagree unequivocably, for i am a very reputable person(just ask my many illigitimate children) and i for one am perfectly aware of what's going on here. i know all about you and the dispicable acts you perform on jellyfish. it's ok man, we all have our quirks, so just let it all out, but msot of tell soemone else about it as i'm rather alte for my 10:30.

Quote from: horabi disagree unequivocably, for i am a very reputable person(just ask my many illigitimate children) and i for one am perfectly aware of what's going on here. i know all about you and the dispicable acts you perform on jellyfish. it's ok man, we all have our quirks, so just let it all out, but msot of tell soemone else about it as i'm rather alte for my 10:30.

Hey, that was only one time, and the jellyfish had it comin'....

Quote from: horab

Quote from: Colonel FailureUm yeah... the non-corporeal one's comments aside...

in any case, if the good reverend's reputation does indeed proceed him, then perhaps he should look into enlargeification in order to proceed his reputation before it gets out of hand. 9/10 reputable persons agree that i have no idea what this thread is about.

Oh, I imagine Tao will come along before then to explain why I'm not REALLY a Discordian. :lol:

you're not really a discordian? hmmm

are you a fake discordian? or a replica discordian? or a faux discordian? are you made out of vinyl or soemthing?


i refuse to be a discordian on the grounds that i have set us up the bomb.

Quote from: horabyou're not really a discordian? hmmm

are you a fake discordian? or a replica discordian? or a faux discordian? are you made out of vinyl or soemthing?


i refuse to be a discordian on the grounds that i have set us up the bomb.

Naugahide, apparently. (http://bbs.fuckedcompany.com/icons/lol.gif)

I prefer to think of myself as a genuine pleather discordian.

Quote from: Colonel FailureI prefer to think of myself as a genuine pleather discordian.

Don't let Tao hear you say that. :lol:

Ya.....you'll get banished fer sher.

Quote from: SssBella, Oracle of DoomYa.....you'll get banished fer sher.

SMOTE with a copy of the Principia!

OWNED!  NEVER TEST! (http://bbs.fuckedcompany.com/icons/lol.gif)

Mwahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

a discordian is a thign that not unliek the tao does nto define itself by what it is, but unlike the tao niether does it define itself by what it is not. the chao is that which is was, will be, isn't, wasn't, wont be, what is possible and what is impossible.



feel free to feel offended of my prejudicical defintion of everyone's beliefs and mindsets. it's not your faults i implanted radio transmitters in all of your heads to think what my giant computer tells you... ;)

Quote from: horaba discordian is a thign that not unliek the tao does nto define itself by what it is, but unlike the tao niether does it define itself by what it is not. the chao is that which is was, will be, isn't, wasn't, wont be, what is possible and what is impossible.



feel free to feel offended of my prejudicical defintion of everyone's beliefs and mindsets. it's not your faults i implanted radio transmitters in all of your heads to think what my giant computer tells you... ;)

It's off to re-education with YOU, my lad!  Contact Tao for details.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: SssBella, Oracle of DoomYa.....you'll get banished fer sher.

SMOTE with a copy of the Principia!

OWNED!  NEVER TEST! (http://bbs.fuckedcompany.com/icons/lol.gif)

Yeah, that shrub thread was getting scary for a little while there. I have to go with the benefit of the doubt/only jakery theory, but the argumentum ad hominems were flying pretty thick...

Quote from: horaba discordian is a thign that not unliek the tao does nto define itself by what it is, but unlike the tao niether does it define itself by what it is not. the chao is that which is was, will be, isn't, wasn't, wont be, what is possible and what is impossible.



feel free to feel offended of my prejudicical defintion of everyone's beliefs and mindsets. it's not your faults i implanted radio transmitters in all of your heads to think what my giant computer tells you... ;)

I'm sure I would be highly offended if only I understood what you said!!!

And as High Papessa of Discordia, I hereby ground you from leaving this forum for any great length of time ever again!

That'll fix ya.

Quote from: Colonel Failure

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: SssBella, Oracle of DoomYa.....you'll get banished fer sher.

SMOTE with a copy of the Principia!

OWNED!  NEVER TEST! (http://bbs.fuckedcompany.com/icons/lol.gif)

Yeah, that shrub thread was getting scary for a little while there. I have to go with the benefit of the doubt/only jakery theory, but the argumentum ad hominems were flying pretty thick...

Not to meantion "appeal to authority".

That was the FUNNIEST shit I've seen in a while.  That thread FAR exceeded my most demented dreams.

for clarification by tao i meant the ancient chinese misinterpretation of the chao, which is as such as i had gotten por lao tzu rather hammered just minutes before hung mung imparted his great wisdom upon the young sage. incrediously he missed the whole part about the base adn the terrible secret of space.

I have a liking for strong drink and what-not, but I know how entirely, fucktastically annoying it can be when something needs to be done and you can't rally the troops because they are slobbering/unconscious/dull, etc. Priorities, people.

Well done, Rev.

Quote from: KaokibilixiI have a liking for strong drink and what-not, but I know how entirely, fucktastically annoying it can be when something needs to be done and you can't rally the troops because they are slobbering/unconscious/dull, etc. Priorities, people.

Well done, Rev.

Yep.  I know *I'D* be pissed if I had to cancel, for example, the sacking of Gary, Indiana, because all my troops were loaded.

Thanks.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: KaokibilixiI have a liking for strong drink and what-not, but I know how entirely, fucktastically annoying it can be when something needs to be done and you can't rally the troops because they are slobbering/unconscious/dull, etc. Priorities, people.

Well done, Rev.

Yep.  I know *I'D* be pissed if I had to cancel, for example, the sacking of Gary, Indiana, because all my troops were loaded.

Thanks.

Hmmm... Hasn't Gary, Indiana already been sacked? Or was that 'driven into economic ruin'?