Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Discordian Recipes => Topic started by: Suu on August 13, 2009, 03:16:28 PM

Title: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 13, 2009, 03:16:28 PM
Today we're brewing a Belgian witbier based on Hoegaarden, only a little different. I'll have General Stuart give updates, as I'll be at work during most of the boiling.

Here's the base recipe we're using, subbing flaked barley for flaked wheat:

http://quantifier.org/qbrew/hoe.pdf

He's already changing it up while he steeps the grains to make the extract.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on August 13, 2009, 03:33:57 PM
Quote from: ☠ Suu ☠ on August 13, 2009, 03:16:28 PM
Today we're brewing a Belgian witbier based on Hoegaarden, only a little different. I'll have General Stuart give updates, as I'll be at work during most of the boiling.

Here's the base recipe we're using, subbing flaked barley for flaked wheat:

http://quantifier.org/qbrew/hoe.pdf

He's already changing it up while he steeps the grains to make the extract.


One of our local brewers makes a fantastic barley based one that looks similar to that recipe... not bad. Though I'm more partial to his Oatmeal Stout. It's like Guinness without the bite at the end.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: AFK on August 13, 2009, 03:41:32 PM
"Brewed Awakenings" :mittens:
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on August 13, 2009, 05:37:48 PM
okay then folks, especially you Squid as word through the vine is that you like to make your own bathtub booze as much as I do. Here it is, steady as she goes, Richter: hand me that bottle of ether and damn the torpedoes:

Found a recipe on the interwebs, and had to alter it to deal with what the brew supply store didn't have in stock, thus:

in the boil:
2 gallons water
1/2 lb flaked barley
1/4 rolled oats
1/2 lb aromatic malt
7 lbs wheat malt extract
2 oz orange zest
2 oz coriander seed, cracked
1 oz golding hops
1 oz saaz hops

Steep the grains for an hour, bring it to a boil and remove the grains.
1 oz golding at 60 minutes (this is a one hour boil, begin the countdown when the boil begins)
7 lbs wheat extract at 20 minutes (this minimizes caramelization for color and flavor.)
1/2 oz saaz, 1 oz coriander, and 1 oz orange zest at 15 minutes
1/2 oz saaz, 10z coriander, and 1 oz orange zest at 5 minutes

Wait for the wort to cool and add it to 3 gallons of cold water, top it up in the carboy if you need more.
Add White Labs Witbier yeast, kick the carboy around to aerate it, and let it get to work.
primary one week, secondary two weeks, bottles for 3 if you're not kegging it.
just remember to add priming sugar to get it all fizzy-like.
Flat beer sucks big floppy donkey dong.

There you have it folks, we're kegging this bitch at the Tavern event in September, we'll see how she goes!
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on August 13, 2009, 05:49:14 PM
almost the same thing as mister PDF, but probably a BIT more full-bodied in taste.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 13, 2009, 10:23:49 PM
WOO! BIER!
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Pope Pixie Pickle on August 14, 2009, 12:00:50 AM
mmmm real ale...

that Oatmeal Stout sounds proper tasty, Rat.

And General Stuarts recipie sounds gooooood.

Pixie O'Fubar... thinks bad mass produced beer should be erased from existence.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Triple Zero on August 14, 2009, 08:59:01 AM
mmm Hoe Garden beer is delicious.

the traditional thing to consume on a sunny afternoon on a terrace on the street outside the bar is a large cool glass of Hoegaarden white with a slice of lemon (some people consider the lemon sacrilege, but it's good).
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 14, 2009, 02:52:05 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on August 14, 2009, 08:59:01 AM
mmm Hoe Garden beer is delicious.

the traditional thing to consume on a sunny afternoon on a terrace on the street outside the bar is a large cool glass of Hoegaarden white with a slice of lemon (some people consider the lemon sacrilege, but it's good).

Lemon is the way to go, but it's not necessary. Have you tried an orange? Orange is more popular with Blue Moon than Hoegaarden, but it's a similar beer.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 14, 2009, 03:25:25 PM
No sign of fermentation yet. Should be another 24 hours or so.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Richter on August 14, 2009, 03:49:18 PM
Def.  The only thing I've ever seen perk after 24 hours is fruit juice loaded with sugar.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Cramulus on August 14, 2009, 08:20:11 PM
this sounds frickin delish
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 14, 2009, 08:23:39 PM
We have foam.

IT'S ALIVE!!!!
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on August 14, 2009, 08:28:07 PM
Quote from: ☠ Suu ☠ on August 14, 2009, 08:23:39 PM
We have foam.

IT'S ALIVE!!!!

Either that or Gen. Stuart really likes the wort.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on August 14, 2009, 08:37:05 PM
It's just protein, baby....
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Triple Zero on August 14, 2009, 09:46:59 PM
Quote from: ☠ Suu ☠ on August 14, 2009, 02:52:05 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on August 14, 2009, 08:59:01 AM
mmm Hoe Garden beer is delicious.

the traditional thing to consume on a sunny afternoon on a terrace on the street outside the bar is a large cool glass of Hoegaarden white with a slice of lemon (some people consider the lemon sacrilege, but it's good).

Lemon is the way to go, but it's not necessary. Have you tried an orange? Orange is more popular with Blue Moon than Hoegaarden, but it's a similar beer.

you're right, looking at your recipe it seems to be the stronger version of Hoegaarden, IIRC "grand prestige", which does go well with orange.

the "regular" one doesnt have (much?) coriander and orange zest in it.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 14, 2009, 11:44:44 PM
Hmm. We had no idea there was a stronger version. It appears you Eurospags are once again keeping all the good stuff to yourselves.

Also, I hope we have enough air in the carboy, cause uh...That foam is risin'.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on August 14, 2009, 11:51:15 PM
Quote from: ☠ Suu ☠ on August 14, 2009, 11:44:44 PM
Hmm. We had no idea there was a stronger version. It appears you Eurospags are once again keeping all the good stuff to yourselves.

Also, I hope we have enough air in the carboy, cause uh...That foam is risin'.



"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!! THE FOAM IZ RISIN'...WHATEVER SHALL WE DO....???!!!!"

I'll tell you what YOU shall do....

you shall:

(http://i144.photobucket.com/albums/r186/Quazie28/shut_the_fuck_up.jpg)

and enjoy the beer when it's done. If I wanted limp-wristed sally-hangers drinking my beer, I would have asked Chuck Norris. That's right, I said it. Fuck you, Chuck. My beer could knock you down with a mere bubble from the airlock.

FUKK ALL YOU HATIZ! MAH BIER IS DA SHIZZ!

::PEACEI'MOUT::
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 14, 2009, 11:52:58 PM
Fine. If it go splodey you haz to clean.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Pope Pixie Pickle on August 15, 2009, 12:15:02 AM
Quote from: ☠ Suu ☠ on August 14, 2009, 11:52:58 PM
Fine. If it go splodey you haz to clean.
:lulz:

i had a hoegaarden white earlier.. a whole pint... felt very tipsy.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on August 17, 2009, 05:56:47 AM
I am excited to hear how this tastes.
I love the orange/coriander thing.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 17, 2009, 02:37:21 PM
It smells awesome.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 20, 2009, 02:52:46 PM
We were supposed to rack into the secondary today, but primary fermentation hasn't finished yet. However, the color is turning that nice Hoegaarden yellow.  :mrgreen:
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 24, 2009, 12:00:02 AM
Still bubblin'.


This is going to be a STRONG ASS brew.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on August 24, 2009, 01:45:57 AM
Yeayer!!

Do you have a hydrometer to check your gravity?

We're about to start a "toilet hooch" type cider.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 24, 2009, 01:55:56 AM
We never took a starting gravity, so we're going by, "I think it looks good to secondary, what do you think?"

:lulz:

General Stuart has never had a problem before with his beer by not using a hydrometer, so I trust his judgement. From what I understand you don't technically have to rack to a secondary anyway, but I think we're going to since we have a lot of funk in the bottom of the carboy. This way it's a bit clearer when we keg and force carbonate.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on August 24, 2009, 03:20:52 AM
It isn't mandatory.
Just wondering what the ABV would be.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 24, 2009, 02:16:36 PM
We're using a witbier yeast, which is genetically engineered to go so far from what I understand. So if it goes as it should, we should have about 6% ABV. I just don't want it to get undrinkable.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Triple Zero on August 25, 2009, 12:55:51 AM
Regular Hoegaarden is about 5 or 6% ABV, but the "Grand Prestige" version (that you appear to be making) is something like 8.6% ABV afaicr.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 25, 2009, 02:18:16 PM
They need to import more Hoegaardens over here.  :argh!:

Here's some pics:
(http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2434/3855256909_c7d8ee59de.jpg)
First day we had the krausen.
(http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2498/3855234803_a8165f4275.jpg)
Today.

That's only been about a week and a half. The color change is pretty cool.


In the other carboy is a lemon, ginger, orange, and long pepper mead.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on August 25, 2009, 04:55:23 PM
Hells. Yeah.


So uh... you wanna trade hooch sometime?
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on August 25, 2009, 07:12:53 PM
Quote from: Squid on August 25, 2009, 04:55:23 PM
Hells. Yeah.


So uh... you wanna trade hooch sometime?

This shit's getting kegged.
For an SCA event.
You want, you come to event.
Savvy?
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Richter on August 25, 2009, 09:29:38 PM
Squid would kill half the tavern, and the other half would like her so much she'd never be allowed to go back.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on August 25, 2009, 09:45:02 PM
Not like that Richter guy.....the last time he showed up preaching about "Reaganomics" and "the chronic fustigation of the antediluvian dysotopia that once was the United States at the hands of the Yellow Horde" it took four federal marshalls leading a lynch mob to take him down.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 25, 2009, 09:54:30 PM
No. That was me after having Vagabond Venom for the first time.  :horrormirth:
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on August 26, 2009, 04:34:09 AM
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
traaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaavel
and booze.

siiiiiiiiiiigh
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on August 26, 2009, 05:07:36 PM
I'm serious Squiddy.....

Come to RI....

There's a keg of my Schidt....

and another keg of homemade Irish Red.....

20 bucks for the whole weekend...and cabins full of sexy men....

what happens in Rhodie
stays in Rhodie... :eek:
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on August 26, 2009, 06:03:30 PM
I can't go anywhere till October.  :sad:

Damn job.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on August 26, 2009, 06:36:44 PM
Fuck October.
and furthermore:
Fuck yourjob.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Sir Squid Diddimus on August 26, 2009, 06:49:08 PM
Right?

Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on August 26, 2009, 07:20:17 PM
Racked into the secondary!

OMG. It tastes like win. A bit more bitter than the usual Hoegaarden, so more along the lines of Blue Moon, but still... :fap: Once we keg and carbonate and chill, this is going to be epic.
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Triple Zero on August 31, 2009, 02:03:17 PM
slightly more bitter is not a bad thing, you can even use the slice of orange to offset that.

congrats on the epic win!
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on August 31, 2009, 05:25:54 PM
Woohooo!
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: Suu on September 14, 2009, 09:58:35 PM
We are now kegged and ready to force carbonation. Sucker is getting tapped this Saturday!
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: 0 on September 14, 2009, 11:01:00 PM
I'LL TAP YOUR SUCKER!


ZING!
Title: Re: Brewed Awakenings: The Hoegaarden Clone 08/13/09
Post by: LMNO on September 15, 2009, 01:01:18 PM
Considering you two are actually dating, that's much more sexy than it originally sounds.