Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Aneristic Illusions => Topic started by: Cain on September 02, 2009, 10:28:16 AM

Title: Oh, the old "explosives up the rectum" gambit, eh?
Post by: Cain on September 02, 2009, 10:28:16 AM
http://www.themedialine.org/news/news_detail.asp?NewsID=26355

QuoteNew details reveal the man who tried to assassinate a Saudi prince got past palace security with explosives hidden in his rectum.

The man who tried to assassinate Saudi Arabia's anti-terror chief last Thursday managed to get past security in a Jeddah palace by hiding explosives in his rectum.

Details of the assassination attempt, the first against a member of the Saudi royal family in decades, were revealed to the pan-Arab Al-Arabiyya.

The method of hiding explosives inside the body is unprecedented among Al-Qa'ida terrorists, and may draw a re-examination and alteration of security arrangements around sensitive facilities and individuals in the Saudi kingdom.

The man targeted, Prince Muhammad Bin Naif, is assistant to the Interior Minister for Security Affairs, and is spearheading the fight against terrorism.

The assailant called the Ministry of Interior and asked to declare his repentance in front of the prince and make a statement urging his peers to abandon Al-Qa'ida's ideologies.

On Thursday evening, he went to the prince's palace in the coastal town of Jeddah and sailed through the security checks with the undetected explosives inside him.

So basically, what this articles fails to say, but heavily implies to anyone who knows anything about Saudi politics, or dabbles in critical thinking, is that there was an attempt to kill off the Saudi counter-terrorism chief which was aided by people who could smuggle weapons into secure locations and hand them over to a terrorist, and that the Saudis are making up fantastical stories about shoving plastique and a detonator up the anal passage to cover up the fact they have Al-Qaeda sympathisers in positions where they can do this.
Title: Re: Oh, the old "explosives up the rectum" gambit, eh?
Post by: Elder Iptuous on September 02, 2009, 08:11:44 PM
Rectum?!
it damn near killed 'im!

seriously, why do you doubt that they could/would use their natural cavities for explosives?  i wonder if there was any shrapnel used....
Title: Re: Oh, the old "explosives up the rectum" gambit, eh?
Post by: LMNO on September 02, 2009, 08:17:12 PM
I call Rule 34 on rectal detonation.
Title: Re: Oh, the old "explosives up the rectum" gambit, eh?
Post by: Elder Iptuous on September 02, 2009, 08:27:36 PM
does fake detonation count?
Title: Re: Oh, the old "explosives up the rectum" gambit, eh?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on September 02, 2009, 08:29:41 PM
Quote from: LMNO on September 02, 2009, 08:17:12 PM
I call Rule 34 on rectal detonation.

Oddly enough, I just had a rectal detonation. 

Casualties:  My toilet.
Title: Re: Oh, the old "explosives up the rectum" gambit, eh?
Post by: Cain on September 02, 2009, 08:32:53 PM
Quote from: Iptuous on September 02, 2009, 08:11:44 PM
Rectum?!
it damn near killed 'im!

seriously, why do you doubt that they could/would use their natural cavities for explosives?  i wonder if there was any shrapnel used....

Because he'd still need to bring in a detonator and that is precisely the sort of thing which turns up on these high level security checks.

Secondly, the Saudis don't advertise assassination attempts.  Ever.  They are more common than the House of Saud would like to admit.  Not too many are threatening - they and the Gulf Sheikhs travel with the tightest security on the planet, and most plots are of the "lone gunmen" type, but they don't want anyone getting ideas, and they also happen to control the press.

Which means, they only released that there was an assassination attempt in order to hide something even more embarassing. Like, say, Al-Qaeda linked extremists within the Interior Ministry's security service helping to plan and execute an assassination attempt.