A friend of mine complained that vampires are no longer badass due to Stephanie Meyer's books.
I disagree.
I think it depends on those who talk about them. If we want vampires to stay badass, we just need to stop calling these newer pitiful bloodsucking things "vampires."
As for what to call them? I suggest "hematophags."
hemogoblins?
sparkly hemogoblins
hemosexuals?
(http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/17/absolutelyclear.jpg) (http://img132.imageshack.us/i/absolutelyclear.jpg/)
http://headtripcomics.comicgenesis.com/comics/20080505.jpg (http://headtripcomics.comicgenesis.com/comics/20080505.jpg)
http://headtripcomics.comicgenesis.com/comics/20080915.jpg (http://headtripcomics.comicgenesis.com/comics/20080915.jpg)
Vampires have always sucked. Even Joss Whedon could only make vampires scary for two seasons, before moving onto demonic nasties.
There were three (3) good vampire stories/movies.
1. Bram Stoker's Dracula.
2. Nosferatu.
3. Stephen King's Salem's Lot.
Everything else has been wankery. Everything.
No... also:
Before Dark
and Blade I.
Quote from: Triple Zero on September 14, 2009, 08:17:49 PM
and Blade I.
What do Europeans know about vampire mythology? :argh!:
I gotta say, I don't think the original Dracula novel was any good.
I have heard that Carmilla was better.
Quote from: Enki v. 2.0 on September 14, 2009, 08:32:38 PM
I gotta say, I don't think the original Dracula novel was any good.
Yeah, but I've seen the pics you imagewall with. Your credibility on this subject is questionable at best.
Meh. The fact that everything was in diary or letter format by definition removed the suspense. It wasn't enough for Stoker to have some letters/diary entries and then allow the reader to realize that someone must have survived to tell the tale -- he insists upon having characters write letters to other characters WHILE being attacked by vampires.
Also, Carmilla had lesbians.
Quote from: Enki v. 2.0 on September 14, 2009, 08:41:15 PM
Meh. The fact that everything was in diary or letter format by definition removed the suspense. It wasn't enough for Stoker to have some letters/diary entries and then allow the reader to realize that someone must have survived to tell the tale -- he insists upon having characters write letters to other characters WHILE being attacked by vampires.
They were a tougher breed, back then.
Quote from: Enki v. 2.0 on September 14, 2009, 08:41:15 PM
Also, Carmilla had lesbians.
Great. So, Anne Rice. Thanks for nothing, Enki.
Quote from: PeregrineBF on September 14, 2009, 08:25:13 AM
(http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/17/absolutelyclear.jpg) (http://img132.imageshack.us/i/absolutelyclear.jpg/)
http://headtripcomics.comicgenesis.com/comics/20080505.jpg (http://headtripcomics.comicgenesis.com/comics/20080505.jpg)
http://headtripcomics.comicgenesis.com/comics/20080915.jpg (http://headtripcomics.comicgenesis.com/comics/20080915.jpg)
Gonna correct this when I get home.
Quote from: Epimetheus on September 14, 2009, 06:05:56 AM
A friend of mine complained that vampires are no longer badass due to Stephanie Meyer's books.
I disagree.
I think it depends on those who talk about them. If we want vampires to stay badass, we just need to stop calling these newer pitiful bloodsucking things "vampires."
As for what to call them? I suggest "hematophags."
Rule 1: Never trust any Mormon to write a good book. Especially lonely, sexually repressed Mormon housewives.
http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/17/absolutelyclear.jpg
What is the 2nd pic in this set from?
Also, fuck True Blood. Kindred: The Embraced or GTFO.
Quote from: Suu on September 14, 2009, 09:20:25 PM
http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/17/absolutelyclear.jpg
What is the 2nd pic in this set from?
Also, fuck True Blood. Kindred: The Embraced or GTFO.
Nosferatu and Salem's Lot. Why? Because they stripped the vampire down to it's essence: A parasite. Much like a tick or a leech.
For what it's worth, the twilight vampires are by far not the lamest.
This takes the honor: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_watermelon
Quote from: Enki v. 2.0 on September 14, 2009, 09:24:07 PM
For what it's worth, the twilight vampires are by far not the lamest.
This takes the honor: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_watermelon
They're not as lame as sparkly vampires.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 14, 2009, 09:23:56 PM
Quote from: Suu on September 14, 2009, 09:20:25 PM
http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/17/absolutelyclear.jpg
What is the 2nd pic in this set from?
Also, fuck True Blood. Kindred: The Embraced or GTFO.
Nosferatu and Salem's Lot. Why? Because they stripped the vampire down to it's essence: A parasite. Much like a tick or a leech.
AH. I haven't seen Salem's Lot in FOREVER.
BUNNICULA WAS THE BEST VAMPIRE BOOK EVAR
HE WILL SUCK YOAR TOMATOES DRYYYYYY!!!!
(http://www.gpschools.org/ci/images/bunnicula1.jpg)
Quote from: ✡ Rabbi ✡ Fred ✡ on September 14, 2009, 09:29:36 PM
BUNNICULA WAS THE BEST VAMPIRE BOOK EVAR
HE WILL SUCK YOAR TOMATOES DRYYYYYY!!!!
(http://www.gpschools.org/ci/images/bunnicula1.jpg)
FRED SPEAKS TROOF!!!
I LIKE True Blood...but agree that Twilight's full of douches.
Quote from: Jenne on September 15, 2009, 04:12:09 AM
I LIKE True Blood...but agree that Twilight's full of douches.
In Nosferatu related news, Patrick Swayze just died.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on September 15, 2009, 04:13:11 AM
Quote from: Jenne on September 15, 2009, 04:12:09 AM
I LIKE True Blood...but agree that Twilight's full of douches.
In Nosferatu related news, Patrick Swayze just died.
I heard. :( Saw him in
Chicago onstage in downtown SD. He was pretty kickass.
FIXED
(http://i476.photobucket.com/albums/rr126/TGRR/absolutelyclear.jpg)
:lol: Yeah, they must've noticed the same thing b/c they cut his hair for the second season.
Quote from: ✡ Rabbi ✡ Fred ✡ on September 14, 2009, 09:29:36 PM
BUNNICULA WAS THE BEST VAMPIRE BOOK EVAR
HE WILL SUCK YOAR TOMATOES DRYYYYYY!!!!
(http://www.gpschools.org/ci/images/bunnicula1.jpg)
YES
OMG I had to read that in 5th grade