What exactly defines an adult anyway?
One can claim that they're grown up because they hit a certain age, but when do you actually feel like you've come to a point where you can consider yourself mature?
I pay bills, I pay rent, I work, I budget money, I was married, I do everything I'm supposed to do, but I don't want to grow up. I'm only 3 years from another decade of existence, but I still haven't reached my tenure. People will always tell you to grow up, but do we ever actually hit that mark? When do you know you're ready? I don't think I am, in fact it frightens me.
I look in the mirror, and these older pictures of me, the mirror still shows what I want it to see, and I close my eyes and remember what I was, and then new photographs show differently. I'm aging, but my body image is skewed by the desire to cling to youth as it slips from within me and around me. In my mind, my sister is still a baby, my hair is still long, I'm still in Florida, hanging on to the innocence of youth and telling myself to not make the mistakes I've made.
But it's too late, right? To go back and fix it all. I can't just close my eyes and change the past, can I? Is there a way? Tell me if there is.
Adult? I've heard a few descriptions.
The first one is the one I favor. An adult is a member of the tribe that is responsible enough to haul their share of the load (note that this is distinct from the capability to do so), while still being ready for a good time.
The second is when you "grow up" and get all serious about everything, and do everything you're supposed to do and nothing you're not. You work all day and watch TV, get drunk to forget all the horrible shit that's piling up around you, and smoke like a fiend to calm yourself from all the coffee you have to have, just to function. And then you sit on the couch, sweating desperately at the thought of your brain-wrenching level of debt, and your kids sneer at you...they'll never know - or care - that you USED to be COOL, before the bills piled up and your incredible weariness caused you to become a Food Tube™.
It's so terribly easy to slide from case 1 to case 2. Especially when circumstances keep you from performing as a productive member of the tribe (this economy, for example). It's so easy to give in to dispair, and make decisions that make things worse (usually involving alcohol, drugs, or reality TV).
But we aren't about the easy way, Suu. We are serious about having a good time, and we are on a first name basis with the Angel of Apathy, who comes along and smacks us when we get too upset. For everything else, there's pills.
You can't stop the ship from sinking. But you CAN crowd the back rail, listen to the band, and sing "It's Raining Men" as people fall to their doom.
It's definitely TGRR definition #1. Are you over 18 years old or an emancipated minor? Are you taking care of yourself and your share of communal responsibilities? Congratulations, you are an adult!
You may never feel any different about yourself than you did when you were 17. Your self-image may be set in some time way back when, possibly when you first became responsibly aware of yourself as a capable, independent person. That's OK. You're still the same person, just older and with perspectives gained from experiences.
If you are unhappy with your body with regards to anything other than injury or illness, the best thing you can do is exercise and form a relationship with your new body. If you want to be thinner, make yourself eat less, eat better, and work out more. You will be rewarded. You cannot reverse age, but you can look damn good at whatever age you're at. I'm 38 and in better shape than I've been for seven years. I ran the sand dunes yesterday, dodging grass clumps and leaping off ledges. I don't look hot like I looked when I was 24, but I'm not attracted to 24-year-olds anymore, and I don't want men who would be attracted to 24-year-olds... know what I mean?
If you have a notion of "hot" that corresponds with "looks 20", consciously discard it. 20 looks hot to other 20-year-olds, and I bet you don't want to look hot to 20-year-olds. Look at the men you're attracted to. Do they look their age? Is their age your age? I think you can put two and two together here. The men I'm attracted to, these days, consistently tell me to let my white streak grow out. "It's so hot!" they tell me. They love when I wear glasses instead of contacts. My dad begged my stepmom to stop dying her hair because he's so attracted to the gray.
Old people think other old people are hot. Roll with it; it's kind of nice, actually.
Also, someday you'll be 40 and you'll look at pictures of yourself now, and say "Holy shit, I was so HOT back then!". Mark my words.
Suu, enjoy your body before it goes all wonky on you. I am missing some bits, and I have other bits I wasn't originally equiped with. Some of these bits flop around, and some give off noxious gasses and make noises at inappropriate times. For the moment I am continent, but that will one day fade. I'm kind of looking forward to it.
Most importantly, have a lot of sex before everything gets all sloppy. It will make you appreciate disgusting sloppy old people sex even more, when that day comes. And come it will, in the blink of an eye. Especially if you spend all of your youth wishing you were even younger, or prematurely aging yourself through abuse.
I will be 41 years old on Saturday, and let me tell you, God has played some truly evil tricks on me, just as he will have his wicked way with you. Enjoy it while you got it, because you can never get it back.
I'm LMNO, and I approve this message.
LMNO
-occasionally finds his joints filled with ground glass.
Quote from: LMNO on October 26, 2009, 07:51:23 PM
I'm LMNO, and I approve this message.
LMNO
-occasionally finds his joints filled with ground glass.
Yeah, my bones feel like crystal. Bright and shiny, and just waiting to shatter like a dropped wineglass.
Like Samuel L Jackson in Unbreakable, but with not as utterly corny a plot.
Quote from: LMNO on October 26, 2009, 07:53:51 PM
Like Samuel L Jackson in Unbreakable, but with not as utterly corny a plot.
Never seen it, but I'll take your word for it.
Still, youth is indeed wasted on the young.
In some way, I hate that I know that now.
Quote from: LMNO on October 26, 2009, 07:56:13 PM
In some way, I hate that I know that now.
I am not the man I was, before December of 1989. I have no connection with that nice, idealistic kid, and I'm probably better off for it.
For some reason when I typed that last night, I don't think it came out the way I wanted it too. Plus I was drunk so...
Yeah. My knees already feel like broken glass. :x I find this funny, because I remember when my mom was my age her knees always creaked and cracked, and she would go, "Oof, I'm getting old."
So I would be, "But mommy, you're not that old! Teehee!"
:horrormirth:
Drinking is bad for you. You should live clean, like I do. I take only prescribed Gooddrugs™ and sundry religious substances, and look at the shape I'm in.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 26, 2009, 07:49:49 PM
Suu, enjoy your body before it goes all wonky on you. I am missing some bits, and I have other bits I wasn't originally equiped with. Some of these bits flop around, and some give off noxious gasses and make noises at inappropriate times. For the moment I am continent, but that will one day fade. I'm kind of looking forward to it.
Most importantly, have a lot of sex before everything gets all sloppy. It will make you appreciate disgusting sloppy old people sex even more, when that day comes. And come it will, in the blink of an eye. Especially if you spend all of your youth wishing you were even younger, or prematurely aging yourself through abuse.
I will be 41 years old on Saturday, and let me tell you, God has played some truly evil tricks on me, just as he will have his wicked way with you. Enjoy it while you got it, because you can never get it back.
Oh my god, you were born on Halloween!
That makes so so much sense.
Quote from: Nigel on October 26, 2009, 10:13:18 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 26, 2009, 07:49:49 PM
Suu, enjoy your body before it goes all wonky on you. I am missing some bits, and I have other bits I wasn't originally equiped with. Some of these bits flop around, and some give off noxious gasses and make noises at inappropriate times. For the moment I am continent, but that will one day fade. I'm kind of looking forward to it.
Most importantly, have a lot of sex before everything gets all sloppy. It will make you appreciate disgusting sloppy old people sex even more, when that day comes. And come it will, in the blink of an eye. Especially if you spend all of your youth wishing you were even younger, or prematurely aging yourself through abuse.
I will be 41 years old on Saturday, and let me tell you, God has played some truly evil tricks on me, just as he will have his wicked way with you. Enjoy it while you got it, because you can never get it back.
Oh my god, you were born on Halloween!
That makes so so much sense.
Yes, and it's the best birthday EVER, when you're 8 years old.
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 09:26:26 PM
For some reason when I typed that last night, I don't think it came out the way I wanted it too. Plus I was drunk so...
Yeah. My knees already feel like broken glass. :x I find this funny, because I remember when my mom was my age her knees always creaked and cracked, and she would go, "Oof, I'm getting old."
So I would be, "But mommy, you're not that old! Teehee!"
:horrormirth:
She wasn't. And you're not, now. And I'm fuck of not, or at least I'm in denial about it.
So far the only evidence there is that I'm getting old is a streak of white hair in front, and soooo many stretch marks. Mostly the white hair, since I got the stretch marks years ago, from the things that gave me the white hair.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 26, 2009, 10:16:04 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 26, 2009, 10:13:18 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 26, 2009, 07:49:49 PM
Suu, enjoy your body before it goes all wonky on you. I am missing some bits, and I have other bits I wasn't originally equiped with. Some of these bits flop around, and some give off noxious gasses and make noises at inappropriate times. For the moment I am continent, but that will one day fade. I'm kind of looking forward to it.
Most importantly, have a lot of sex before everything gets all sloppy. It will make you appreciate disgusting sloppy old people sex even more, when that day comes. And come it will, in the blink of an eye. Especially if you spend all of your youth wishing you were even younger, or prematurely aging yourself through abuse.
I will be 41 years old on Saturday, and let me tell you, God has played some truly evil tricks on me, just as he will have his wicked way with you. Enjoy it while you got it, because you can never get it back.
Oh my god, you were born on Halloween!
That makes so so much sense.
Yes, and it's the best birthday EVER, when you're 8 years old.
Well, I'm having a huge goddamn party on Saturday, and I'm telling everybody it's for your birthday.
Quote from: Nigel on October 26, 2009, 10:16:49 PM
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 09:26:26 PM
For some reason when I typed that last night, I don't think it came out the way I wanted it too. Plus I was drunk so...
Yeah. My knees already feel like broken glass. :x I find this funny, because I remember when my mom was my age her knees always creaked and cracked, and she would go, "Oof, I'm getting old."
So I would be, "But mommy, you're not that old! Teehee!"
:horrormirth:
She wasn't. And you're not, now. And I'm fuck of not, or at least I'm in denial about it.
So far the only evidence there is that I'm getting old is a streak of white hair in front, and soooo many stretch marks. Mostly the white hair, since I got the stretch marks years ago, from the things that gave me the white hair.
Lol, I've been going gray since I was 16.
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 10:48:24 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 26, 2009, 10:16:49 PM
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 09:26:26 PM
For some reason when I typed that last night, I don't think it came out the way I wanted it too. Plus I was drunk so...
Yeah. My knees already feel like broken glass. :x I find this funny, because I remember when my mom was my age her knees always creaked and cracked, and she would go, "Oof, I'm getting old."
So I would be, "But mommy, you're not that old! Teehee!"
:horrormirth:
She wasn't. And you're not, now. And I'm fuck of not, or at least I'm in denial about it.
So far the only evidence there is that I'm getting old is a streak of white hair in front, and soooo many stretch marks. Mostly the white hair, since I got the stretch marks years ago, from the things that gave me the white hair.
Lol, I've been going gray since I was 16.
Check to see if you can still do a ten-mile hike. If yes, you're fine.
Quote from: Nigel on October 26, 2009, 11:22:02 PM
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 10:48:24 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 26, 2009, 10:16:49 PM
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 09:26:26 PM
For some reason when I typed that last night, I don't think it came out the way I wanted it too. Plus I was drunk so...
Yeah. My knees already feel like broken glass. :x I find this funny, because I remember when my mom was my age her knees always creaked and cracked, and she would go, "Oof, I'm getting old."
So I would be, "But mommy, you're not that old! Teehee!"
:horrormirth:
She wasn't. And you're not, now. And I'm fuck of not, or at least I'm in denial about it.
So far the only evidence there is that I'm getting old is a streak of white hair in front, and soooo many stretch marks. Mostly the white hair, since I got the stretch marks years ago, from the things that gave me the white hair.
Lol, I've been going gray since I was 16.
Check to see if you can still do a ten-mile hike. If yes, you're fine.
I probably could do it, how I would feel afterward on the other hand is a different story.
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 11:49:26 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 26, 2009, 11:22:02 PM
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 10:48:24 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 26, 2009, 10:16:49 PM
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 09:26:26 PM
For some reason when I typed that last night, I don't think it came out the way I wanted it too. Plus I was drunk so...
Yeah. My knees already feel like broken glass. :x I find this funny, because I remember when my mom was my age her knees always creaked and cracked, and she would go, "Oof, I'm getting old."
So I would be, "But mommy, you're not that old! Teehee!"
:horrormirth:
She wasn't. And you're not, now. And I'm fuck of not, or at least I'm in denial about it.
So far the only evidence there is that I'm getting old is a streak of white hair in front, and soooo many stretch marks. Mostly the white hair, since I got the stretch marks years ago, from the things that gave me the white hair.
Lol, I've been going gray since I was 16.
Check to see if you can still do a ten-mile hike. If yes, you're fine.
I probably could do it, how I would feel afterward on the other hand is a different story.
Time to get packin'! As my dad always says, death gets you from the feet up.
Quote from: Suu on October 26, 2009, 10:48:24 PM
Lol, I've been going gray since I was 16.
I've been going bald since I was 16. :sad:
And you know that you are officially an adult when you realize that everyone else is as full of shit as you are.
I am an adult. I know this because I was given an initiation ceremony when I was a teenager. Was it a "real" initiation ceremony? No, I wasn't given more responsibilities, but I was listened to more. At that point however I knew I was an adult.
As a young adult I did many incredibly foolish things. Now I am middle aged (I defined it, as a child, middle age starts at 30 and ends at 60, after that, you are old. Maybe not you, but me) There were things I hadn't expected about middle age. You don't have to stop being weird, you just understand it better. I don't do stupid things, or if i do they are stupid at a level I really could not have reached when i was younger. I think I look sexier now than i ever did. Sure, I put on some weight, I'm not chiseled and my glasses are so thick you could fry ants with them at 100 paces. I have the geek look down to an art, and that's what turns me on.
I will be 32 in a few weeks (they ended world war one because they knew I was coming) and I am looking forward to the journey through middle age.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 26, 2009, 09:56:03 PM
Drinking is bad for you. You should live clean, like I do. I take only prescribed Gooddrugs™ and sundry religious substances, and look at the shape I'm in.
Fuck that noise! I don't want them to bury a pristine corpse. I want them to look at my remains and think "Jesus H Fuck! He should have been dead 20 years ago. Sorry Mr Organ donor rep but my internal stuff would be no use to you cos I've run that shit into the ground! There's nothing left but some kinda of foul soup that smells vaguely like diesel. If my joints last me another 10 years it'll be goddamn miracle - I fully expect to be in a wheelchair within the decade and I'll have earned that fucker. The best things in life are not free - they cost blood, sweat and broken bones. Some of them fuck up your liver too. I have no wish to be eighty years old cos I never drunk, screwed or jumped off a bridge just for the sheer hell of it. I'd rather settle for sixty but have some serious fun getting there.
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 28, 2009, 12:00:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 26, 2009, 09:56:03 PM
Drinking is bad for you. You should live clean, like I do. I take only prescribed Gooddrugs™ and sundry religious substances, and look at the shape I'm in.
Fuck that noise! I don't want them to bury a pristine corpse. I want them to look at my remains and think "Jesus H Fuck! He should have been dead 20 years ago. Sorry Mr Organ donor rep but my internal stuff would be no use to you cos I've run that shit into the ground! There's nothing left but some kinda of foul soup that smells vaguely like diesel. If my joints last me another 10 years it'll be goddamn miracle - I fully expect to be in a wheelchair within the decade and I'll have earned that fucker. The best things in life are not free - they cost blood, sweat and broken bones. Some of them fuck up your liver too. I have no wish to be eighty years old cos I never drunk, screwed or jumped off a bridge just for the sheer hell of it. I'd rather settle for sixty but have some serious fun getting there.
We need an irony emote, I am thinking.
I'll probably have to have a hip replacement in about 20 or 30 years thanks to the now-retired hrosie bucking me off pretty hard last year. :| Every joint in my body has been creaking and popping since I was 8.
Suu you aren't old! I like Nigel's idea of going for a hike. Even if it isn't for 10 miles, it's nice to get out every so often.
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 28, 2009, 12:00:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 26, 2009, 09:56:03 PM
Drinking is bad for you. You should live clean, like I do. I take only prescribed Gooddrugs™ and sundry religious substances, and look at the shape I'm in.
Fuck that noise! I don't want them to bury a pristine corpse. I want them to look at my remains and think "Jesus H Fuck! He should have been dead 20 years ago. Sorry Mr Organ donor rep but my internal stuff would be no use to you cos I've run that shit into the ground! There's nothing left but some kinda of foul soup that smells vaguely like diesel. If my joints last me another 10 years it'll be goddamn miracle - I fully expect to be in a wheelchair within the decade and I'll have earned that fucker. The best things in life are not free - they cost blood, sweat and broken bones. Some of them fuck up your liver too. I have no wish to be eighty years old cos I never drunk, screwed or jumped off a bridge just for the sheer hell of it. I'd rather settle for sixty but have some serious fun getting there.
Have you heard of this thing called "A Happy Medium"? It's rad... it's where you get to have a fuckload of fun, but take care of your body at the same time and don't do too many things that are stupid, so that you can actually continue having a fuckload of fun for LONGER. It's a pretty awesome concept.
Everyone I know who set out to live hard and die young didn't actually die young, instead they got prematurely old and achy and decrepit and have to live another twenty or thirty years of being miserable and fucked up while I continue to have a fuckload of fun with my relatively well-cared-for body for probably a good forty to fifty years more. And I'll be sipping bourbon out of a flask at their funerals, right before I go bone some hot elderly who took care of himself and is good for another few rounds.