Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 17, 2009, 03:29:31 AM

Title: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 17, 2009, 03:29:31 AM
(http://i476.photobucket.com/albums/rr126/TGRR/IMG000055.jpg)

LET'S TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT THAT, SHALL WE?

(http://i476.photobucket.com/albums/rr126/TGRR/IMG000055a.jpg)

BEEF?  WHO THE FUCK MAKES HAGGIS WITH BEEF?  GODDAMN TEXANS, THAT'S WHO!

I WANT MY FUCKING MONEY BACK!

On a related note, I also want my arteries back:

(http://i476.photobucket.com/albums/rr126/TGRR/IMG000056a.jpg)

Now, some of you may be asking "TGRR, Why on GOD'S GREEN EARTH would you have CANNED HAGGIS?"

In response, I can only deny everything and put you in contact with my publicist, my lawyer, or my priesthood in Mexico, as appropriate.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Elder Iptuous on December 17, 2009, 03:53:21 AM
Hey!
they serve that crap at the Texas Highland Games that is held annually at my Alma mater, right here in river city!
it's ok....  not a huge fan, but it's ok...
now those hard boiled eggs filled with spam... those things give you super powers!
also, there are many Scotts that show up there serving their bizzare food that i wouldn't want to insinuate have anything to appologize for, lest they hurl a curling stone at my skull...


Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Dimocritus on December 17, 2009, 04:29:37 AM
Quote from: Iptuous on December 17, 2009, 03:53:21 AM
Hey!
they serve that crap at the Texas Highland Games that is held annually at my Alma mater, right here in river city!
it's ok....  not a huge fan, but it's ok...
now those hard boiled eggs filled with spam... those things give you super powers!
also, there are many Scotts that show up there serving their bizzare food that i wouldn't want to insinuate have anything to appologize for, lest they hurl a curling stone at my skull...




Where can I get some or how are they made. I must try some.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Suu on December 17, 2009, 04:32:28 AM
HAGGIS IS ALWAYS SHEEP.

SHEEPS!


(http://insertcopyhere.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/sheep.jpg)
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 17, 2009, 07:42:20 AM
This is lovely.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on December 17, 2009, 09:59:57 AM
Scotland cannot be insulted. Srsly. We deep fry MArs Bars here. In LARD!!!
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Payne on December 17, 2009, 01:55:05 PM
Nope, the Texans have it about right. Completely misinterpreting "traditional" dishes by using the wrong meat and then pumping that shit FULL of fat is like our equivalent of the Olympic games or such. Anything to insult that pansy assed hippie Rabbie Burns and make him turn in his grave, or fill Sir Walter Scott with effete rage.

Fucking haggis. If it doesn't take months off your life you're doing it wrong.

On a side note, The Carron Fish Bar which lays claim to inventing the Deep Fried Mars Bar was flooded earlier this year. Surely a sign from on high.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Elder Iptuous on December 17, 2009, 02:52:36 PM
Quote from: dimo on December 17, 2009, 04:29:37 AM
Quote from: Iptuous on December 17, 2009, 03:53:21 AM
...
now those hard boiled eggs filled with spam... those things give you super powers!
...

Where can I get some or how are they made. I must try some.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scotch_egg
recipes available on google...
expect horrible things to happen.
(http://farm1.static.flickr.com/107/278217474_b81382f304.jpg)
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on December 17, 2009, 02:56:55 PM
Scotch eggs are fucking WIN3

If you urgently require a coronary thrombosis they'll hit the spot every time.

They're like pretty much all other scottish food in that respect.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on December 17, 2009, 06:54:04 PM
Must agree Scotch Eggs are awesome... but use Sausage NOT SPAM FOR GODDESSSAKE!!!!!
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on December 17, 2009, 07:31:35 PM
Just deep fry them for a month in tepid LARD. They'll taste the same as everything else. Doesn't matter if you use sausage, spam or cardboard.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Freeky on December 17, 2009, 08:21:05 PM
Despite the content of this thread, I am exceedingly hungry.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Dimocritus on December 17, 2009, 09:50:01 PM
Thanks much, Ipy.

Also, Pent, your new avatar is doing terrible things to my psyche.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Cain on December 17, 2009, 09:54:23 PM
Quote from: Doctor Rat Bastard on December 17, 2009, 06:54:04 PM
Must agree Scotch Eggs are awesome... but use Sausage NOT SPAM FOR GODDESSSAKE!!!!!

This, although most British sausage is on a par with spam (only needs to be 40% pork to be called a pork sausage...).
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Requia ☣ on December 17, 2009, 10:51:14 PM
I think that makes it much less than spam, which is 100% pork shoulder.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Freeky on December 18, 2009, 12:10:38 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 17, 2009, 03:29:31 AM
(http://i476.photobucket.com/albums/rr126/TGRR/IMG000055.jpg)

LET'S TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT THAT, SHALL WE?

(http://i476.photobucket.com/albums/rr126/TGRR/IMG000055a.jpg)

BEEF?  WHO THE FUCK MAKES HAGGIS WITH BEEF?  GODDAMN TEXANS, THAT'S WHO!

I WANT MY FUCKING MONEY BACK!

On a related note, I also want my arteries back:

(http://i476.photobucket.com/albums/rr126/TGRR/IMG000056a.jpg)

Now, some of you may be asking "TGRR, Why on GOD'S GREEN EARTH would you have CANNED HAGGIS?"

In response, I can only deny everything and put you in contact with my publicist, my lawyer, or my priesthood in Mexico, as appropriate.

NOW YOU LOOK THAT OTHER GUY FROM SOME MOVIE!

This one is skinnier, but shorter than, John Goodman.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 18, 2009, 01:53:28 AM
Good lord.  My beard took up all of my face except just around the eyes.  Look at that shit.

Now with less hairy bits:


(http://i476.photobucket.com/albums/rr126/TGRR/IMG000057a.jpg)
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Freeky on December 18, 2009, 02:03:25 AM
Yeah. You do look like some other actor now.

Gaddamn it, I know I don't know this guys name, but I can't even think of what movie he was in. I have a screenshot of it in my head, though, and its bugging me.

Unlike you, though, I think this guy is blonde, or perhaps light brown haired.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Eater of Clowns on December 18, 2009, 02:11:43 AM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky on December 18, 2009, 02:03:25 AM
Yeah. You do look like some other actor now.

Gaddamn it, I know I don't know this guys name, but I can't even think of what movie he was in. I have a screenshot of it in my head, though, and its bugging me.

Unlike you, though, I think this guy is blonde, or perhaps light brown haired.

Sean Bean?

(http://www.bbc.co.uk/southyorkshire/content/images/2006/04/21/sean_bean_350x350.jpg)

(http://img4.imageshack.us/img4/7707/tgrr.jpg)
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 18, 2009, 02:31:18 AM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky on December 18, 2009, 02:03:25 AM
Yeah. You do look like some other actor now.

Gaddamn it, I know I don't know this guys name, but I can't even think of what movie he was in. I have a screenshot of it in my head, though, and its bugging me.

Unlike you, though, I think this guy is blonde, or perhaps light brown haired.

Bobcat Goldwaithe?   :lulz:

A depressing amount of my beard is gray, now, and while I was bald, my hair kinda wandered that direction, too.

Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Freeky on December 18, 2009, 02:45:54 AM
No to both of those, although he does look a bit like Sean Bean.

Um....


Shit, I watched this movie several times. And recently, I feel.

Maybe if you crossed Finlay http://www.wwe.com/superstars/smackdown/finlay/ with Sean Sean, only made him slightly more heaviset. But only slightly.

I feel like this guy played a cop in the movie I'm thinking... And was only a supporting role.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Eater of Clowns on December 18, 2009, 02:49:11 AM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky on December 18, 2009, 02:45:54 AM
I feel like this guy played a cop in the movie I'm thinking... And was only a supporting role.

Michael Madsen?  Played a supporting role cop in Sin City.

(http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1007/1453472736_84628a23d0.jpg)
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Freeky on December 18, 2009, 02:52:57 AM
I don't mean to play 20 questons or anything, but no. This movie was in color.

Plus, not as many wrinkles, wider face, and blonde. I'm almost certain now. And not as much hair.

AUGH! It's like, right on the tip of my tongue or something!
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Freeky on December 18, 2009, 03:01:38 AM
I GOT IT! HE LOOKS LIEK DIS GUY!

This guy. (http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Black-Guy-R.jpg)













PS. I give up.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 18, 2009, 06:11:01 AM
More open-mouth pics please. Don't tell your girlfriend I said that. Also I am drunk.
Title: Re: TEXANS: EXPLAIN THIS INSULT TO SCOTLAND.
Post by: Triple Zero on December 18, 2009, 11:27:43 AM
for some reason, the heavy over-exposure of your webcam irritates me to no end, so I spent some time retouching your photo:

(http://img163.imageshack.us/img163/6945/rogerretouch.jpg)

Enjoy :)