I am often arrested with gripping visions of things that, in the moment, I am sure are the most excellent thing possible. Later I rediscover the notes of these ideas scrawled into paper pads and backs of envelopes, and realize that they are only awesome if you abuse drugs. I will post some of them here, feel free to post yours.
Metal Skeleton Metal:
A genre of metal that is so damned metal that it can only be properly performed by animated skeletons made of steel.
A rideable robotic t-rex. Its saddle is actually a cleverly contrived sex apparatus so that I may ride whilst I ride. There would also be a costume for riding the robotic rex, which includes a crotchless spacesuit and a cape.
Minerature elephants and giraffes as pets. They'd be about knee or thigh high. The problem, of course, is strays. Who wants to put down a l'il giraffe?
If I had robotic workers at my command, I would make them run guns and drugs for me. They would use the money and surplus weapons to create a gigantic concrete cube in the middle of the south, where there is nothing but harsh wastes. This vast cube would house a maze filled with deadly traps, fabulous riches, and CCTV cameras. The robots would stalk the halls slaying intruders, entertaining untold millions with endless spectacles of greed and violence on live television. Eventually, perhaps quickly, it would be taken off the air when the violence was discovered to be real, and I would give away a live video stream of it over the internet. The cube would remain open, and greater riches would fill the chambers attracting ever more to the challenge. Of course a series of unfair Gygaxian traps would protect the truly valuable loot. Eventually its politically polarizing influence would assist in causing the next world war, and the fall of mankind. Over time however, tribes would reemerge, although primitive. They would one day find my cube, and be driven out by what they could only imagine are demons or gods. An emissary from these demons would come to them, offering vast riches and magicks in exchange for their reverence to the one true god, Felix. They would be invited inside, shown my place of burial, and would show obeisance to me with great prose and rituals of worship. The death cube would form the basis for their creation myth, and the robots would last on as the adepts of my faith.
A robot that feels pain?
american idol
Quote from: Felix on January 10, 2010, 09:18:09 AM
If I had robotic workers at my command, I would make them run guns and drugs for me. They would use the money and surplus weapons to create a gigantic concrete cube in the middle of the south, where there is nothing but harsh wastes. This vast cube would house a maze filled with deadly traps, fabulous riches, and CCTV cameras. The robots would stalk the halls slaying intruders, entertaining untold millions with endless spectacles of greed and violence on live television. Eventually, perhaps quickly, it would be taken off the air when the violence was discovered to be real, and I would give away a live video stream of it over the internet. The cube would remain open, and greater riches would fill the chambers attracting ever more to the challenge. Of course a series of unfair Gygaxian traps would protect the truly valuable loot. Eventually its politically polarizing influence would assist in causing the next world war, and the fall of mankind. Over time however, tribes would reemerge, although primitive. They would one day find my cube, and be driven out by what they could only imagine are demons or gods. An emissary from these demons would come to them, offering vast riches and magicks in exchange for their reverence to the one true god, Felix. They would be invited inside, shown my place of burial, and would show obeisance to me with great prose and rituals of worship. The death cube would form the basis for their creation myth, and the robots would last on as the adepts of my faith.
How can this be an idea of FAIL? SELL THIS IDEA TO YOUR LOCAL TV STATION! MAKE MILLIONS! NAO!
Felix, these are some of the most brilliant ideas I've ever seen.
Especially the metal skeleton metal.
ECH,
not currently abusing (many) drugs
Quote from: Mistress Freeky on January 10, 2010, 05:49:58 PM
Quote from: Felix on January 10, 2010, 09:18:09 AM
If I had robotic workers at my command, I would make them run guns and drugs for me. They would use the money and surplus weapons to create a gigantic concrete cube in the middle of the south, where there is nothing but harsh wastes. This vast cube would house a maze filled with deadly traps, fabulous riches, and CCTV cameras. The robots would stalk the halls slaying intruders, entertaining untold millions with endless spectacles of greed and violence on live television. Eventually, perhaps quickly, it would be taken off the air when the violence was discovered to be real, and I would give away a live video stream of it over the internet. The cube would remain open, and greater riches would fill the chambers attracting ever more to the challenge. Of course a series of unfair Gygaxian traps would protect the truly valuable loot. Eventually its politically polarizing influence would assist in causing the next world war, and the fall of mankind. Over time however, tribes would reemerge, although primitive. They would one day find my cube, and be driven out by what they could only imagine are demons or gods. An emissary from these demons would come to them, offering vast riches and magicks in exchange for their reverence to the one true god, Felix. They would be invited inside, shown my place of burial, and would show obeisance to me with great prose and rituals of worship. The death cube would form the basis for their creation myth, and the robots would last on as the adepts of my faith.
How can this be an idea of FAIL? SELL THIS IDEA TO YOUR LOCAL TV STATION! MAKE MILLIONS! NAO!
That was actually part of an idea I had to write a novel about this guy who invents robotic workers, gives 20 of them to everybody who helped him in his life, and sets his own robot free. The book tells the story of each of these people, but they each die at some point near the end of their little tales, of mysterious causes. Near the end it becomes clear that the freed robot has been killing these people and freeing the robots, leading a heroic robot rights movement behind the scenes of the story all along.
Gun Control
Censorship
Affirmative Action
Eugenics
"Less Lethal" weapons
"well if it's for the children..."
This has been done by friends....
Skateboard off the roof of a second story house
Wheel barrow off the same roof
Send a car in neutral down a busy residential hill
I'd like to play shipmast, but only with a 1964 Dodge Challenge painted white with a 440 engine.
Step 1: Legally change name to "Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Russia's Greatest Love Machine"
Step 2: Get arrested.
Step 3: Laugh as judge is forced to read your new legal name aloud in court.
Quote from: Richter on January 10, 2010, 08:47:07 PM
Gun Control
Censorship
Affirmative Action
Eugenics
"Less Lethal" weapons
Fixed.
While they are sometimes used improperly, they still save lives.
Quote from: -Kel- on January 10, 2010, 11:31:47 PM
This has been done by friends....
Skateboard off the roof of a second story house
Wheel barrow off the same roof
Send a car in neutral down a busy residential hill
I'd like to play shipmast, but only with a 1964 Dodge Challenge painted white with a 440 engine.
Anyone know why it is called Shipmast? I am curious.
Write an OS.
Quote from: Slanket the Destroyer on January 16, 2010, 06:56:21 PM
Quote from: Richter on January 10, 2010, 08:47:07 PM
Gun Control
Censorship
Affirmative Action
Eugenics
"Less Lethal" weapons
Fixed.
While they are sometimes used improperly, they still save lives.
Agreed.
Giving them to (most) cops however...
christianity
ghost drive the whip
this thread
your mom
Giving your cousin's small children mountain dew.
Love.
:lulz:
Install many cameras and microphones in and around my home, stream all material to my server, run face recognition software, profile everyone i know, install a text to speech engine trough which i can send arbitrary text separately to every room in the house and the area around the house. Install of course an encrypted remote control access because i can't be at home all day. replace all doorlocks with electrically opened locks which are also controlled by my server. give various people scheduled access to various rooms. give them accounts which will expire and have to be renewed.. etc..
Quote from: Saint Bourgeoise on January 18, 2010, 02:32:40 AM
Install many cameras and microphones in and around my home, stream all material to my server, run face recognition software, profile everyone i know, install a text to speech engine trough which i can send arbitrary text separately to every room in the house and the area around the house. Install of course an encrypted remote control access because i can't be at home all day. replace all doorlocks with electrically opened locks which are also controlled by my server. give various people scheduled access to various rooms. give them accounts which will expire and have to be renewed.. etc..
Install many cameras and microphones in and around my home, stream all material to my server, run face recognition software, profile everyone i know, install a text to speech engine trough which i can send arbitrary text separately to every room in the house and the area around the house. Create a sentence generation engine programmed to match their sentence structure and set to randomly say creepy things to them in their own voice when they are home alone.
Quote from: Enki v. 2.0 on January 18, 2010, 03:13:34 AM
Quote from: Saint Bourgeoise on January 18, 2010, 02:32:40 AM
Install many cameras and microphones in and around my home, stream all material to my server, run face recognition software, profile everyone i know, install a text to speech engine trough which i can send arbitrary text separately to every room in the house and the area around the house. Install of course an encrypted remote control access because i can't be at home all day. replace all doorlocks with electrically opened locks which are also controlled by my server. give various people scheduled access to various rooms. give them accounts which will expire and have to be renewed.. etc..
Install many cameras and microphones in and around my home, stream all material to my server, run face recognition software, profile everyone i know, install a text to speech engine trough which i can send arbitrary text separately to every room in the house and the area around the house. Create a sentence generation engine programmed to match their sentence structure and set to randomly say creepy things to them in their own voice when they are home alone.
:lulz: That would be a glorious mindfuck.
Another one I had today.
Next time somebody asks me why I am late, I will tell them I had to take my grandmother to rehab, and sob gently into my hands.
Taking a new job closer to home thinking it is going to be awesome instead of not-awesome which it turns out to be.
Damn. Sorry about that, Rev.
That sucks balls.
Also, sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Sand gets in places sand was not meant to go.
Quote from: Cain on January 28, 2010, 03:20:12 PM
That sucks balls.
Also, sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Sand gets in places sand was not meant to go.
Same idea holds true for sex in the woods.... pieces of leaves and twigs in places you really don't want them....
running naked while on acid/mushrooms in a field of wheat.
Quote from: Khara on January 28, 2010, 03:34:39 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 28, 2010, 03:20:12 PM
That sucks balls.
Also, sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Sand gets in places sand was not meant to go.
Same idea holds true for sex in the woods.... pieces of leaves and twigs in places you really don't want them....
:x :x :x :x :walken:
So true.
Sex on a pile of dry wheatgrass on a very warm summer day, though? :D
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 28, 2010, 11:03:48 AM
Taking a new job closer to home thinking it is going to be awesome instead of not-awesome which it turns out to be.
What's wrong with the new job?
Quote from: Khara on January 28, 2010, 03:34:39 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 28, 2010, 03:20:12 PM
That sucks balls.
Also, sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Sand gets in places sand was not meant to go.
Same idea holds true for sex in the woods.... pieces of leaves and twigs in places you really don't want them....
That's why you bring a blanket.
Quote from: Triple Zero on January 28, 2010, 06:04:05 PM
Quote from: Khara on January 28, 2010, 03:34:39 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 28, 2010, 03:20:12 PM
That sucks balls.
Also, sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Sand gets in places sand was not meant to go.
Same idea holds true for sex in the woods.... pieces of leaves and twigs in places you really don't want them....
That's why you bring a blanket.
I can't think of anywhere I don't want leaves and twigs. :?
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 28, 2010, 06:04:50 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on January 28, 2010, 06:04:05 PM
Quote from: Khara on January 28, 2010, 03:34:39 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 28, 2010, 03:20:12 PM
That sucks balls.
Also, sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Sand gets in places sand was not meant to go.
Same idea holds true for sex in the woods.... pieces of leaves and twigs in places you really don't want them....
That's why you bring a blanket.
I can't think of anywhere I don't want leaves and twigs. :?
You don't have the necessary bits. :x
Quote from: Mistress Freeky on January 28, 2010, 06:06:03 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 28, 2010, 06:04:50 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on January 28, 2010, 06:04:05 PM
Quote from: Khara on January 28, 2010, 03:34:39 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 28, 2010, 03:20:12 PM
That sucks balls.
Also, sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Sand gets in places sand was not meant to go.
Same idea holds true for sex in the woods.... pieces of leaves and twigs in places you really don't want them....
That's why you bring a blanket.
I can't think of anywhere I don't want leaves and twigs. :?
You don't have the necessary bits. :x
As far as YOU know.
TGRR,
Had extra orifices installed for tax reasons.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 28, 2010, 06:07:41 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky on January 28, 2010, 06:06:03 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 28, 2010, 06:04:50 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on January 28, 2010, 06:04:05 PM
Quote from: Khara on January 28, 2010, 03:34:39 PM
Quote from: Cain on January 28, 2010, 03:20:12 PM
That sucks balls.
Also, sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Sand gets in places sand was not meant to go.
Same idea holds true for sex in the woods.... pieces of leaves and twigs in places you really don't want them....
That's why you bring a blanket.
I can't think of anywhere I don't want leaves and twigs. :?
You don't have the necessary bits. :x
As far as YOU know.
TGRR,
Had extra orifices installed for tax reasons.
.......
:x :x :x :x :x :x :walken:
I love being me. :)
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 28, 2010, 05:39:29 PM
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 28, 2010, 11:03:48 AM
Taking a new job closer to home thinking it is going to be awesome instead of not-awesome which it turns out to be.
What's wrong with the new job?
The Director is a dumb-ass, unqualified hippy from Vermont. I've asked him 4 times now to find out what my Employee ID number is so I can fill out some forms for the hospital. Clearly he doesn't know how to work the phone or follow up, or something. Also, it's pretty clear he doesn't really understand what it is I'm supposed to do for this grant, fortunately, the project director for the initiative does, and so I can work around him.
I'm also fairly certain that I am going to be horribly bored in this job compared to my last one. The workplan is anemic at best, and I'm not sure how much impact it will really have. But, I've got a job right? I shouldn't complain too much.
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 29, 2010, 01:17:15 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 28, 2010, 05:39:29 PM
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 28, 2010, 11:03:48 AM
Taking a new job closer to home thinking it is going to be awesome instead of not-awesome which it turns out to be.
What's wrong with the new job?
The Director is a dumb-ass, unqualified hippy from Vermont. I've asked him 4 times now to find out what my Employee ID number is so I can fill out some forms for the hospital. Clearly he doesn't know how to work the phone or follow up, or something. Also, it's pretty clear he doesn't really understand what it is I'm supposed to do for this grant, fortunately, the project director for the initiative does, and so I can work around him.
I'm also fairly certain that I am going to be horribly bored in this job compared to my last one. The workplan is anemic at best, and I'm not sure how much impact it will really have. But, I've got a job right? I shouldn't complain too much.
Yep. And you can use this job to stay alive while you find something more exciting. This is important, because in this economy, that could take a very, very long time.
NEW ENTRY
posting on pd from a public toilet.
Quote from: Felix on January 29, 2010, 01:55:04 AM
NEW ENTRY
posting on pd from a public toilet.
Isn't that redundant?
:rimshot:
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 29, 2010, 11:26:28 AM
Quote from: Felix on January 29, 2010, 01:55:04 AM
NEW ENTRY
posting on pd from a public toilet.
Isn't that redundant?
:rimshot:
don't you mean re-dung-dant?
:rimshot: :rimshot:
:crankey:
Quote from: Triple Zero on January 29, 2010, 07:05:02 PM
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 29, 2010, 11:26:28 AM
Quote from: Felix on January 29, 2010, 01:55:04 AM
NEW ENTRY
posting on pd from a public toilet.
Isn't that redundant?
:rimshot:
don't you mean re-dung-dant?
:rimshot: :rimshot:
I don't know what kind of mood urine, but that was a shitty pun.
ohgodicantstandit
Quote from: Ratatosk on January 29, 2010, 07:57:56 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on January 29, 2010, 07:05:02 PM
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name? on January 29, 2010, 11:26:28 AM
Quote from: Felix on January 29, 2010, 01:55:04 AM
NEW ENTRY
posting on pd from a public toilet.
Isn't that redundant?
:rimshot:
don't you mean re-dung-dant?
:rimshot: :rimshot:
I don't know what kind of mood urine, but that was a shitty pun.
You two just wipe that smell off your faeces.
Dating.
Wait, have I already posted that in this thread?
It doesn't matter. Still a terrible idea that sounded awesome.