Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 12, 2010, 09:59:08 PM

Title: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 12, 2010, 09:59:08 PM
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0002CYTL2

:horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:

This is IT. I am burning it all down.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Nast on January 12, 2010, 10:06:28 PM
 :horrormirth:

Wow, that's some serious horrormirth right there.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 12, 2010, 10:08:19 PM
DIE, CIVILIZATION. DIE.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Nast on January 12, 2010, 10:08:56 PM
Do you think it comes with any mini-tazer choking hazards?
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Jasper on January 12, 2010, 10:11:42 PM
It's causing me a choking hazard right now.   :crankey:
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Bartlett on January 12, 2010, 10:29:04 PM
The review by roxybeast is fucking hilarious.   :lulz:
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 12, 2010, 10:41:46 PM
Oh, yeah.  You're getting "the treatment".
/
(http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41G9WA5NRDL._SL500_AA280_.jpg)
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Elder Iptuous on January 12, 2010, 10:49:49 PM
this is a few years old.
they now need an updated version for full body scan so that the playmobile security agent can make sure that the playmobile suspect traveler doesn't have some C4 wrapped around his bait n' tackle....
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: hooplala on January 12, 2010, 11:36:15 PM
Look at that guy on the right, loafing on the fucking job...
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 12, 2010, 11:37:37 PM
Quote from: Hoopla on January 12, 2010, 11:36:15 PM
Look at that guy on the right, loafing on the fucking job...

That's a chick.

In a black uniform with an armband.   :lulz:
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Requia ☣ on January 12, 2010, 11:41:06 PM
Can't stop laughing  :horrormirth:
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Richter on January 12, 2010, 11:48:05 PM
ARSTIFISTINPRACRAPDAMDIEEKFUKENFRAGHELL!
:crankey:
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Fundamentalist on January 12, 2010, 11:48:22 PM
Quote from: loosenut
I was a little disappointed when I first bought this item, because the functionality is limited. My 5 year old son pointed out that the passenger's shoes cannot be removed. Then, we placed a deadly fingernail file underneath the passenger's scarf, and neither the detector doorway nor the security wand picked it up. My son said "that's the worst security ever!". But it turned out to be okay, because when the passenger got on the Playmobil B757 and tried to hijack it, she was mobbed by a couple of other heroic passengers, who only sustained minor injuries in the scuffle, which were treated at the Playmobil Hospital.
The best thing about this product is that it teaches kids about the realities of living in a high-surveillence society. My son said he wants the Playmobil Neighborhood Surveillence System set for Christmas. I've heard that the CC TV cameras on that thing are pretty worthless in terms of quality and motion detection, so I think I'll get him the Playmobil Abu-Gharib Interogation Set instead (it comes with a cute little memo from George Bush).

Seems like writing reviews could be fun.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: rygD on January 12, 2010, 11:50:56 PM
This shit is fucking great, I must get one of these just so I can show it off.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on January 13, 2010, 12:00:00 AM
Tags customers associate with this product:

"Police state"
"Tyrrany"
"Fascism"
"Fear"
"Martial law"
"1984"


:lulz:
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Johnny on January 13, 2010, 12:04:42 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:00:00 AM
Tags customers associate with this product:

"Police state"
"Tyrrany"
"Fascism"
"Fear"
"Martial law"
"1984"


:lulz:

WE MIGHT NOT HAVE WON ANY SPELLING BEE CONTESTS, BUT WE CAN SURE SEE THE LONG TENTACLES OF THE MACHINE !!
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
 :oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Bartlett on January 13, 2010, 12:13:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
:oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
The system has brainwashed you into thinking you're not brainwashed!   :tinfoilhat:
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:14:47 AM
Quote from: Bartlett on January 13, 2010, 12:13:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
:oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
The system has brainwashed you into thinking you're not brainwashed!   :tinfoilhat:

The system has brainwashed you into thinking it brainwashes people!
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on January 13, 2010, 12:16:05 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:14:47 AM
Quote from: Bartlett on January 13, 2010, 12:13:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
:oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
The system has brainwashed you into thinking you're not brainwashed!   :tinfoilhat:

The system has brainwashed you into thinking it brainwashes people!

The system has brainwashed me into thinking I'm posting on an internet forum with other real people from around the world! :x
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:17:12 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:16:05 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:14:47 AM
Quote from: Bartlett on January 13, 2010, 12:13:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
:oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
The system has brainwashed you into thinking you're not brainwashed!   :tinfoilhat:

The system has brainwashed you into thinking it brainwashes people!

The system has brainwashed me into thinking I'm posting on an internet forum with other real people from around the world! :x

HAH!  Everyone's really in Phoenix.  Even you.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Cainad (dec.) on January 13, 2010, 12:20:38 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:17:12 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:16:05 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:14:47 AM
Quote from: Bartlett on January 13, 2010, 12:13:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
:oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
The system has brainwashed you into thinking you're not brainwashed!   :tinfoilhat:

The system has brainwashed you into thinking it brainwashes people!

The system has brainwashed me into thinking I'm posting on an internet forum with other real people from around the world! :x

HAH!  Everyone's really in Phoenix.  Even you.

JESUS FUCKING SHITYARGANARGANARGFUUUUUUUUUUUCK


fuck's sake man, don't do that to a guy...
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: rygD on January 13, 2010, 12:23:39 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:17:12 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:16:05 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:14:47 AM
Quote from: Bartlett on January 13, 2010, 12:13:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
:oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
The system has brainwashed you into thinking you're not brainwashed!   :tinfoilhat:

The system has brainwashed you into thinking it brainwashes people!

The system has brainwashed me into thinking I'm posting on an internet forum with other real people from around the world! :x

HAH!  Everyone's really in Phoenix.  Even you.

You mean like brains in a vat?
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:25:46 AM
Quote from: rygD on January 13, 2010, 12:23:39 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:17:12 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:16:05 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:14:47 AM
Quote from: Bartlett on January 13, 2010, 12:13:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
:oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
The system has brainwashed you into thinking you're not brainwashed!   :tinfoilhat:

The system has brainwashed you into thinking it brainwashes people!

The system has brainwashed me into thinking I'm posting on an internet forum with other real people from around the world! :x

HAH!  Everyone's really in Phoenix.  Even you.

You mean like brains in a vat?


No, life's not that kind.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Johnny on January 13, 2010, 12:26:31 AM

(http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1018/1393553920_e22c948f90.jpg)
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 13, 2010, 12:37:33 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:17:12 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:16:05 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 13, 2010, 12:14:47 AM
Quote from: Bartlett on January 13, 2010, 12:13:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad on January 13, 2010, 12:07:05 AM
:oops: the System has brainwashed me into not being able to spell tyranny; soon they will brainwash me out of being able to think about it!
The system has brainwashed you into thinking you're not brainwashed!   :tinfoilhat:

The system has brainwashed you into thinking it brainwashes people!

The system has brainwashed me into thinking I'm posting on an internet forum with other real people from around the world! :x

HAH!  Everyone's really in Phoenix.  Even you.

:x

Phoenix is one of the most awful places in the history of places.

I may have mentioned this before, but my son was conceived in a shithole motel in Tempe. I was supposed to be in downtown Phoenix getting drunk with my brother-in-law. Or wait. Maybe I had already done that. That would explain why I was raping my husband.

It was a long time ago.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: East Coast Hustle on January 13, 2010, 03:09:54 AM
TRUE FACT: Nigel was the real Baseline Killer.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 13, 2010, 03:27:33 AM
Quote from: Emerald City Hustle on January 13, 2010, 03:09:54 AM
TRUE FACT: Nigel was the real Baseline Killer.

:scared:
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: The Johnny on January 13, 2010, 03:28:58 AM
Quote from: Emerald City Hustle on January 13, 2010, 03:09:54 AM
TRUE FACT: Nigel was the real BVaseline Killer.

Fix't¿

Note: I have no idea what Baseline Killer means or refers to.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 13, 2010, 03:50:11 AM
Quote from: JohNyx on January 13, 2010, 03:28:58 AM
Quote from: Emerald City Hustle on January 13, 2010, 03:09:54 AM
TRUE FACT: Nigel was the real BVaseline Killer.

Fix't¿

Note: I have no idea what Baseline Killer means or refers to.

Serial killer: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baseline_Killer
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Dysnomia on January 13, 2010, 04:41:36 AM
I think this toy made it around last year when someone had the "gifts you get people you hate" threads around christmas (08)
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Iason Ouabache on January 13, 2010, 07:06:48 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on January 13, 2010, 03:50:11 AM
Quote from: JohNyx on January 13, 2010, 03:28:58 AM
Quote from: Emerald City Hustle on January 13, 2010, 03:09:54 AM
TRUE FACT: Nigel was the real BVaseline Killer.

Fix't¿

Note: I have no idea what Baseline Killer means or refers to.

Serial killer: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baseline_Killer
Wow. Phoenix even fails at having interesting serial killers. No psychotic notes to the press. No forcing his lover to be an accomplice. No cat and mouse game with the cops for decades. No clown suits. No cannibalism. Lame!
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Reginald Ret on January 13, 2010, 10:19:57 AM
QuoteProduct Description
From the Manufacturer
The woman traveler stops by the security checkpoint. After placing her luggage on the screening machine, the airport employee checks her baggage. The traveler hands her spare change and watch to the security guard and proceeds through the metal detector. With no time to spare, she picks up her luggage and hurries to board her flight!

She forgot her spare change and watch!
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Triple Zero on January 13, 2010, 10:25:53 AM
funny thing is, 10 years ago this would have been just a toy, part of Playmobil Airport pieces or something.
Title: Re: OH MY FUCKING... NO. KILL ME.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on January 13, 2010, 05:33:18 PM
Quote from: Iason Ouabache on January 13, 2010, 07:06:48 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on January 13, 2010, 03:50:11 AM
Quote from: JohNyx on January 13, 2010, 03:28:58 AM
Quote from: Emerald City Hustle on January 13, 2010, 03:09:54 AM
TRUE FACT: Nigel was the real BVaseline Killer.

Fix't¿

Note: I have no idea what Baseline Killer means or refers to.

Serial killer: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baseline_Killer
Wow. Phoenix even fails at having interesting serial killers. No psychotic notes to the press. No forcing his lover to be an accomplice. No cat and mouse game with the cops for decades. No clown suits. No cannibalism. Lame!

The only thing that makes it interesting is that they're probably charging the wrong guy.

Poor guy.