Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Techmology and Scientism => Topic started by: Jasper on April 16, 2010, 09:38:52 AM

Title: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Jasper on April 16, 2010, 09:38:52 AM
http://www.popsci.com/node/45064/?cmpid=enews041510

"Cocaine is a hell of a drug, but getting shocked with a Taser while riding high on methamphetamines probably beats any white-knuckled cocaine experience hands down. And that's exactly what happened to some lucky sheep in a new study that tested the effects of Tasers on meth-addled targets, funded in part by Taser International. "

Isn't it great to be a human?
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Richter on April 16, 2010, 01:09:52 PM
The entire distilation of my initial response is "FUCK YEW GOAT!"

More academically, I'm (horror pleasantly) surprised that we live in a culture where people who abuse and endanger themselves or others while under the effects of illegal drugs are so carefully watched out for.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Chairman Risus on April 16, 2010, 03:07:52 PM
Quote from: Richter on April 16, 2010, 01:09:52 PM
The entire distilation of my initial response is "FUCK YEWE GOAT!"

More academically, I'm (horror pleasantly) surprised that we live in a culture where people who abuse and endanger themselves or others while under the effects of illegal drugs are so carefully watched out for.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Lies on April 16, 2010, 03:19:48 PM
Sounds like its a great time to be a sheep! drugs and tazering for all!
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Jasper on April 16, 2010, 06:51:11 PM
Although the substance abuse in animals these days is shocking.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 16, 2010, 07:15:17 PM
WTF is this, PETA?

What are we going to do, load up a bunch of humans on meth and then taser them to see what happens?

I don't know, I guess my sense of species and appreciation for science that could help save human lives is a little higher than some others. Some animal testing is cruel and pointless, but sometimes it beats locking a little girl in a cage and seeing how she does for 10 years without love, and what can be done to fix it.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 16, 2010, 07:17:39 PM
I say this, BTW, not because I think humans are inherently "better" than other animals, but because I am one and I expect kinship to be primary. Also, I think it is reasonable to expect kinship to be primary.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Triple Zero on April 16, 2010, 07:22:43 PM
Yes. Most of the debate with the (more reasonable) vegetarians I know, for example, is about how close of a secondary the non-kin life is, right?
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 16, 2010, 08:38:05 PM
Yeah; like, don't eat monkeys, but fish are OK.

Science is harder because the closer of kin the test subjects are, the more useful the results are likely to be.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Doktor Howl on April 16, 2010, 08:44:50 PM
I've eaten monkey.  Spider monkey, to be exact.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: BADGE OF HONOR on April 16, 2010, 09:16:17 PM
I was wondering why sheep since they're not known for their, erm, aggression, but then I realized you have to have something approaching the body mass of a human being, but not so large that going on a meth-fueled rampage would be dangerous.   :lol:
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Requia ☣ on April 16, 2010, 10:08:59 PM
I so want to see a herd of meth addled sheep going on a rampage now.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Eater of Clowns on April 16, 2010, 11:19:58 PM
I was in Amherst at some shitty little ice cream/hot dog/fried food stand.  I went back to my car to get a bottle of water.  A pickup truck had parked pretty close to the door, but only the cab part was really visible with this grizzled farmer looking dude sitting there.  So I stepped between the two vehicles and then
MRARAMMRGRAAAAAAHHRA

a fucking screech from no worldly creature erupted behind me.  The fury driving it, the pure hatred for me for being in its presence, was visceral.  I turned, expecting some horrible thing and thinking of how I might escape.  In the back of the guy's truck was a sheep in a little metal cage, a dull and bored look on its face.

I've never wanted a tazer so badly in my life.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Jasper on April 17, 2010, 12:46:05 AM
In the experiment they sedate the sheep while they are being shocked.  So not only is there no experience of psychological stress that might contribute to a heart attack in a real life case of tazing a meth user, but there are drugs (sedatives) in the sheep that may spoil the usefulness of the results.  So yeah, since the methodology is lackluster, probably skewed to give results that the funding party wants to hear so it's not certain that the results of the experiment will be useful enough to justify the level of cruelty.

I'd totally be happy with this sort of study if it had more promise of delivering usable, concrete results, even if a more accurate study would be somewhat more cruel.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Freeky on April 17, 2010, 08:04:18 AM
You know, I personally think that they ought to have used stupid fucking meth heads for this experiment, because if they're stupid enough to tweak, then they should be tazed for it.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Jasper on April 17, 2010, 08:16:03 AM
:lulz:  FOR ACCURACY!
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Bruno on April 17, 2010, 10:08:11 AM
Quote from: Professor Freeky on April 17, 2010, 08:04:18 AM
You know, I personally think that they ought to have used stupid fucking meth heads for this experiment, because if they're stupid enough to tweak, then they should be tazed for it.

I just wanted to thank and congratulate you for saying "tazed" instead of "tazered".



...but then I remembered that it's actually "tased".

Still, I'm giving you partial credit for showing a basic understanding of the concept.


B+
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Shibboleet The Annihilator on April 17, 2010, 12:17:36 PM
WAKE UP SHEEPLE!
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Cramulus on April 17, 2010, 01:53:18 PM
WAKE UP SHEEPLE!
      /
(http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g235/LynneSin97/taser.gif)



Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 17, 2010, 04:04:14 PM
Quote from: Jerry_Frankster on April 17, 2010, 10:08:11 AM
Quote from: Professor Freeky on April 17, 2010, 08:04:18 AM
You know, I personally think that they ought to have used stupid fucking meth heads for this experiment, because if they're stupid enough to tweak, then they should be tazed for it.

I just wanted to thank and congratulate you for saying "tazed" instead of "tazered".



...but then I remembered that it's actually "tased".

Still, I'm giving you partial credit for showing a basic understanding of the concept.


B+

JF, in case you missed it, I'd like to introduce you to this fine post by Cain: http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=24818.0
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 17, 2010, 04:04:46 PM
I'd really like to see a meth-addled flock of sheep.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: President Television on April 17, 2010, 06:23:37 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on April 17, 2010, 04:04:14 PM
JF, in case you missed it, I'd like to introduce you to this fine post by Cain: http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=24818.0

Cram's post is already relevant.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Shibboleet The Annihilator on April 17, 2010, 11:38:56 PM
When you spell words incorrectly, people assume you're a dumbass. I, for one, would rather be corrected than continue to spell it wrong.

Also, taser is an acronym for Thomas A. Swift's Electric Rifle.

:themoreyouknow:
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Jasper on April 17, 2010, 11:45:45 PM
It ought to be spelled with a 'z'.  Anything that shoots electricity at people needs futuristic letters like x and z in its name.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Bruno on April 17, 2010, 11:46:58 PM
Spelling "taser" with a z actually doesn't bother me. I just hate it when people say "tasered".

For all I know, it may actually be technically correct. I just don't like it.

Also, good point Sig.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 18, 2010, 02:12:13 AM
Thomas A. Swift needs to change his last name to Zwift. Clearly.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Bruno on April 18, 2010, 02:27:42 AM
Quote from: Ten Ton Mantis on April 17, 2010, 11:38:56 PM
When you spell words incorrectly, people assume you're a dumbass. I, for one, would rather be corrected than continue to spell it wrong.

Also, taser is an acronym for Thomas A. Swift's Electric Rifle.

:themoreyouknow:

:lulz: I thought you were joking, but then I Googlized and Wikipediated it, and it turns out you weren't.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Rumckle on April 18, 2010, 08:57:28 AM
Quote from: Cramulus on April 17, 2010, 01:53:18 PM
WAKE UP SHEEPLE!
      /
(http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g235/LynneSin97/taser.gif)


That's an awesome emote!
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: BabylonHoruv on May 07, 2010, 08:29:25 AM
Quote from: Professor Freeky on April 17, 2010, 08:04:18 AM
You know, I personally think that they ought to have used stupid fucking meth heads for this experiment, because if they're stupid enough to tweak, then they should be tazed for it.

They probably could have got some people to volunteer, if they offered free meth.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: Juana on May 08, 2010, 12:33:40 AM
^ This.


Quote from: BADGE OF HONOR on April 16, 2010, 09:16:17 PM
I was wondering why sheep since they're not known for their, erm, aggression, but then I realized you have to have something approaching the body mass of a human being, but not so large that going on a meth-fueled rampage would be dangerous.   :lol:
Sheep are mean.
Title: Re: Sheep + Meth + Tasers = SCIENCE!
Post by: BadBeast on May 09, 2010, 01:50:21 AM
Quote from: Professor Freeky on April 17, 2010, 08:04:18 AM
You know, I personally think that they ought to have used stupid fucking meth heads for this experiment, because if they're stupid enough to tweak, then they should be tazed for it.

I know a Bloke who had been up for four nights, charged up like a fuckin' rocket, on more amphetamines than you could shake a big shitty stick at. He was tazed by an uneasy pair of Scuffers, who saw him rocking backwards and forwards in a shop doorway, muttering to himself at 3 am. They shot him with two tazers, because he gave no reaction to anything they said or did. He said he never felt the tazers, except as a vague tingling in his spine, but he got really angry when they started spraying him down with pepper spray. And ended up with 2 charges of assaulting a Policeman, with intent. Got 3 months for it too. All he wanted was a few hours sleep. But he forgot where he had been staying. (hence the shop doorway)
But I'm fairly certain he would be prepared to offer himself as a test subject. For money. (Not even very much money)