Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on May 01, 2010, 03:36:45 AM

Title: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on May 01, 2010, 03:36:45 AM
Quote
A CHEF has died after an EEL was put up his bum.

Shocked doctors in Sichuan, China, found the sea creature in the 59-year-old man's rectum after his death, it has been reported.

The 50cm long Asian swamp eel was allegedly inserted into the unnamed man's bottom, after he passed out drunk, by pals playing a prank on him.

Medics said the eel had devoured his bowels.


http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html#ixzz0mdpUMw00

:lulz:

CHEF! WE HARDLY KNEW YA!
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Suu on May 01, 2010, 04:31:34 AM
Holy fuck!
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Shibboleet The Annihilator on May 01, 2010, 05:17:53 AM
 :x

All sorts of seriously fucked up new (http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/01/world/asia/01china.html?hp)s coming out of China lately.
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: MMIX on May 01, 2010, 12:53:12 PM
Quote from: Ne+@uNGr0+ on May 01, 2010, 03:36:45 AM
Quote
A CHEF has died after an EEL was put up his bum.

Shocked doctors in Sichuan, China, found the sea creature in the 59-year-old man's rectum after his death, it has been reported.

The 50cm long Asian swamp eel was allegedly inserted into the unnamed man's bottom, after he passed out drunk, by pals playing a prank on him.

Medics said the eel had devoured his bowels.



http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html#ixzz0mdpUMw00

:lulz:

CHEF! WE HARDLY KNEW YA!


with friends like his you don't need enemas . . .
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Dimocritus on May 01, 2010, 04:48:26 PM
Quote from: MMIX on May 01, 2010, 12:53:12 PM
Quote from: Ne+@uNGr0+ on May 01, 2010, 03:36:45 AM
Quote
A CHEF has died after an EEL was put up his bum.

Shocked doctors in Sichuan, China, found the sea creature in the 59-year-old man's rectum after his death, it has been reported.

The 50cm long Asian swamp eel was allegedly inserted into the unnamed man's bottom, after he passed out drunk, by pals playing a prank on him.

Medics said the eel had devoured his bowels.



http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html#ixzz0mdpUMw00

:lulz:

CHEF! WE HARDLY KNEW YA!


with friends like his you don't need enemas . . .

*groan*
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on May 02, 2010, 12:20:30 AM
Quote from: MMIX on May 01, 2010, 12:53:12 PM
Quote from: Ne+@uNGr0+ on May 01, 2010, 03:36:45 AM
Quote
A CHEF has died after an EEL was put up his bum.

Shocked doctors in Sichuan, China, found the sea creature in the 59-year-old man's rectum after his death, it has been reported.

The 50cm long Asian swamp eel was allegedly inserted into the unnamed man's bottom, after he passed out drunk, by pals playing a prank on him.

Medics said the eel had devoured his bowels.



http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html#ixzz0mdpUMw00

:lulz:

CHEF! WE HARDLY KNEW YA!


with friends like his you don't need enemas . . .

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Iason Ouabache on May 02, 2010, 01:11:54 AM
I bet he only sent the eel in to catch the gerbil he couldn't get out.
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: MMIX on May 02, 2010, 01:27:43 AM
Quote from: Iason Ouabache on May 02, 2010, 01:11:54 AM
I bet he only sent the eel in to catch the gerbil he couldn't get out.

that must have been why he needed that lightbulb, too . . .
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Kai on May 02, 2010, 01:45:25 AM
Quote from: MMIX on May 01, 2010, 12:53:12 PM
Quote from: Ne+@uNGr0+ on May 01, 2010, 03:36:45 AM
Quote
A CHEF has died after an EEL was put up his bum.

Shocked doctors in Sichuan, China, found the sea creature in the 59-year-old man's rectum after his death, it has been reported.

The 50cm long Asian swamp eel was allegedly inserted into the unnamed man's bottom, after he passed out drunk, by pals playing a prank on him.

Medics said the eel had devoured his bowels.



http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html#ixzz0mdpUMw00

:lulz:

CHEF! WE HARDLY KNEW YA!


with friends like his you don't need enemas . . .

That was SO BAD.  :argh!: :lulz: :horrormirth:
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Jasper on May 02, 2010, 02:32:14 AM
This is :horrormirth: , and I can't stop hearing this in my head now.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0AckvdGbk4w
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Brotep on May 02, 2010, 03:05:20 AM
 :x

Damn you, MMIX  :argh!:  :horrormirth:
...I lol'd

@Iason: even though that was probably a Mallrats reference, I now have this stuck in my head:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sbD6czlVNU
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Dysnomia on May 05, 2010, 05:17:33 AM
There was an old Chef who swallowed an Eel
We cannot describe what he started to feel
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Brotep on May 05, 2010, 10:54:46 PM
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on May 05, 2010, 05:17:33 AM
There was an old Chef who swallowed an Eel
We cannot describe what he started to feel

...perhaps he'll keel?
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Dysnomia on May 06, 2010, 12:00:21 AM
Quote from: Brotep on May 05, 2010, 10:54:46 PM
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on May 05, 2010, 05:17:33 AM
There was an old Chef who swallowed an Eel
We cannot describe what he started to feel

...perhaps he'll keel?

:lulz:

There was an old Chef who swallowed a seal
He swallowed the seal to catch the eel.


perhaps he'll keel?

:lulz:
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Shibboleet The Annihilator on May 06, 2010, 03:50:54 PM
VP,
would love to hear Chef weigh in on this thread
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: the last yatto on May 07, 2010, 10:31:55 AM
made in china :?
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Triple Zero on May 07, 2010, 03:28:30 PM
Quote from: MMIX on May 01, 2010, 12:53:12 PM
Quote from: Ne+@uNGr0+ on May 01, 2010, 03:36:45 AM
Quote
A CHEF has died after an EEL was put up his bum.

Shocked doctors in Sichuan, China, found the sea creature in the 59-year-old man's rectum after his death, it has been reported.

The 50cm long Asian swamp eel was allegedly inserted into the unnamed man's bottom, after he passed out drunk, by pals playing a prank on him.

Medics said the eel had devoured his bowels.



http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2954500/Chef-dies-after-feeling-eel.html#ixzz0mdpUMw00

:lulz:

CHEF! WE HARDLY KNEW YA!


with friends like his you don't need enemas . . .

:potd:
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Shibboleet The Annihilator on May 07, 2010, 03:31:29 PM
...rest in peace, Chef Diesel.  :cry:
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Dysnomia on May 07, 2010, 03:36:00 PM
There was an old Chef who swallowed a whale (pronounce weel a la little boy at preschool)
he swallowed the whale to catch the seal
he swallowed the seal to catch the eel
perhaps he'll keel
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Brotep on May 07, 2010, 04:10:11 PM
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the cat
And ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the dog
And bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the stick
And beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the ox
That drank the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the butcher
That slew the ox
That drank the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim.
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the Angel of Death
And killed the butcher
That slew the ox
That drank the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the Holy One
Blessed be G-d
And destroyed the Angel of Death
That killed the butcher
That slew the ox
That drank the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the sticks
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.
Title: Re: CHEF DIES AFTER FEELING EEL
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on May 08, 2010, 01:45:07 AM
Quote from: Brotep on May 07, 2010, 04:10:11 PM
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the cat
And ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the dog
And bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the stick
And beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the ox
That drank the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the butcher
That slew the ox
That drank the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim.
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the Angel of Death
And killed the butcher
That slew the ox
That drank the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the stick
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Then came the Holy One
Blessed be G-d
And destroyed the Angel of Death
That killed the butcher
That slew the ox
That drank the water
That quenched the fire
That burned the sticks
That beat the dog
That bit the cat
That ate the kid eel
My father bought for two zuzim
One little goat eel, one slimy little goat eel.

Oh good goddamn.  :lulz: