Are you sick of the BP oil spill? I'm not. I
love it. So I'm going to break lockstep from you spags and come out in favor of it.
Here are some reasons why:
- The value of non-waterfront property is going up
- It's nice to finally score a point in the great game of Man vs Nature
- The ocean is now filled with cool slime monsters
- Fuck the Atlantic
- Animal population control. The sea was getting too crowded anyway.
- More profit for exxon mobil
:lulz: Love this. Needs to be made into new internet meme.
why do you guys love the oil spill?
More of the velvety southern drawl of Haley Barbour
...You took all the greatest and best reasons, Cram. I esp like the "fuck the Atlantic" one, but then I can see the Pacific from my backdoor, so there's some bias there, I believe.
I just applaud the thinking here, the in-your-face turnaboutism, tongue in cheek reverse psychology. /the brilliance goes without saying
I wish I had something original to say about this, but I'm knee-deep in ETS schtick, so that could be why. Or I'm just too banal for words in general.
The looks on people's faces when I tactfully play "Smoke on the water"
Quote from: Richter on June 17, 2010, 08:12:03 PM
The looks on people's faces when I tactfully play "Smoke on the water"
:spit2:
Quote from: Cramulus on June 17, 2010, 07:49:25 PM
why do you guys love the oil spill?
Watching retirees from the Midwest die when they can't make it to their spawning ground.
Ok, found one:
That there's now a martini on tap called "the Oil Spill"? (http://blog.al.com/breaking/2010/06/virginia_oysters_oil_spill_mar.html)
i love it for shit like this...
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/17/joe-barton-apology-shaked_n_616220.html (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/17/joe-barton-apology-shaked_n_616220.html)
After Republican Rep. Joe Barton issued an apology to BP CEO Tony Hayward at a Capitol Hill hearing Thursday -- calling the Obama administration's efforts to hold the oil giant accountable a "shakedown" -- lawmakers on both sides of the aisle swiftly responded to the Texas congressman's remarks by demanding he step down as the ranking Republican on the House Energy and Commerce Committee.
Quote from: -Kel- on June 17, 2010, 09:22:58 PM
i love it for shit like this...
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/17/joe-barton-apology-shaked_n_616220.html (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/06/17/joe-barton-apology-shaked_n_616220.html)
After Republican Rep. Joe Barton issued an apology to BP CEO Tony Hayward at a Capitol Hill hearing Thursday -- calling the Obama administration's efforts to hold the oil giant accountable a "shakedown" -- lawmakers on both sides of the aisle swiftly responded to the Texas congressman's remarks by demanding he step down as the ranking Republican on the House Energy and Commerce Committee.
Ok, that is win, I agree.
I think I'm just better at being a spectator at this kind of sport.
Well, you can hardly blame him. BP bought him fair & square, and now it's time to collect on those campaign contributions.
:lulz:
BP doesn't give campaign donations anymore (they stopped in 2002). So the guy wasn't even properly paid for.
Quote from: Requia ☣ on June 17, 2010, 09:35:35 PM
BP doesn't give campaign donations anymore (they stopped in 2002). So the guy wasn't even properly paid for.
Tell me another one, Requia. They're funneling money somehow. NO oil company walks around without a congressman or 20 in their pocket.
The Oil Spill improves the value of Dawn Dish Detergent's stock!
Also, an excuse for all those stinky ocean animals to be given a bath.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 17, 2010, 09:37:19 PM
Quote from: Requia ☣ on June 17, 2010, 09:35:35 PM
BP doesn't give campaign donations anymore (they stopped in 2002). So the guy wasn't even properly paid for.
Tell me another one, Requia. They're funneling money somehow. NO oil company walks around without a congressman or 20 in their pocket.
BP and its employees have given more than $3.5 million to federal candidates over the past 20 years, with the largest chunk of their money going to Obama, according to the Center for Responsive Politics. Donations come from a mix of employees and the company's political action committees - $2.89 million flowed to campaigns from BP-related PACs and about $638,000 came from individuals.
On top of that, the oil giant has spent millions each year on lobbying — including $15.9 million last year alone — as it has tried to influence energy policy.
During his time in the Senate and while running for president, Obama received a total of $77,051 from the oil giant and is the top recipient of BP PAC and individual money over the past 20 years, according to financial disclosure records.
In Congress, Sen. Mary Landrieu (D-La.), who last week cautioned that the incident should "not be used inappropriately" to halt Obama's push for expansion of offshore drilling, has been one of the biggest beneficiaries of BP's largesse. Her comments created some blowback, with critics complaining that she is too blasé about the impact of the disaster, even though she was among the first lawmakers to call for a federal investigation into the spill.
As the top congressional recipient in the last cycle and one of the top BP cash recipients of the past two decades, Landrieu banked almost $17,000 from the oil giant in 2008 alone and has lined her war chest with more than $28,000 in BP cash overall.
http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE64420A20100505
Ouch, ouch, ouch.
Poor Requia.
Reuters is full of shit, oil rig workers giving to Obama doesn't count as BP giving to Obama.
That said, according to Reuters' source it looks like while BP hasn't given its own money to campaigns or PACs anymore, they set up a PAC fund that still has money to give out, about $200,000 a year. So yeah, BP is gaming the system.
I support the oil spill because when oceanfront property is worthless I want to buy a few thousand acres and open it to rednecks so they come kill black animals. For $1500 a head.
I'd make up some :horrormirth: joke, but I'm really too depressed about it to poke fun.
Quote from: Charley Brown on June 17, 2010, 09:49:54 PM
I support the oil spill because when oceanfront property is worthless I want to buy a few thousand acres and open it to rednecks so they come kill black animals. For $1500 a head.
:argh!: :cry:
Quote from: Kai on June 17, 2010, 09:54:45 PM
I'd make up some :horrormirth: joke, but I'm really too depressed about it to poke fun.
I'm right there with you, Kai--I tried for horrormirth and got a booze shot out of it. :|
Quote from: Jenne on June 17, 2010, 10:30:19 PM
Quote from: Charley Brown on June 17, 2010, 09:49:54 PM
I support the oil spill because when oceanfront property is worthless I want to buy a few thousand acres and open it to rednecks so they come kill black animals. For $1500 a head.
:argh!: :cry:
wut?
Quote from: Requia ☣ on June 17, 2010, 09:49:17 PM
Reuters is full of shit, oil rig workers giving to Obama doesn't count as BP giving to Obama.
That said, according to Reuters' source it looks like while BP hasn't given its own money to campaigns or PACs anymore, they set up a PAC fund that still has money to give out, about $200,000 a year. So yeah, BP is gaming the system.
Generally the employees donating political contributions aren't Joe Oil Rigger but rather Joe the Veep or Joe the CxO... its one of the rather oily ways that corporations are getting around the "OMGZ you're in the pocket of Big Corp"... of course, without full disclosure, I have no way to be sure... and it could be Joe Rigger just hoping to get a democrat elected.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 17, 2010, 09:37:19 PM
Quote from: Requia ☣ on June 17, 2010, 09:35:35 PM
BP doesn't give campaign donations anymore (they stopped in 2002). So the guy wasn't even properly paid for.
Tell me another one, Requia. They're funneling money somehow. NO oil company walks around without a congressman or 20 in their pocket.
"Incentives".
I support the oilspill because were finally going to be rid of all those gulf walruses...
I support the oilspill because it's removing most of that nasty yucky oil from the site of my future undersea cave fortress.
The Atlantic supports the Oil Spill.
literally.
Quote from: Jenne on June 17, 2010, 08:22:10 PM
Ok, found one:
That there's now a martini on tap called "the Oil Spill"? (http://blog.al.com/breaking/2010/06/virginia_oysters_oil_spill_mar.html)
That's not a martini, that's just a cocktail :argh!:
The Oil Spill will inevitably end up inspiring at least one cool new Mythbusters episode.
Heh, I'm gonna be that guy who actually has cause to be happy about the oil spill.
What's bad for Florida tourism is great for USVI tourism. The oil spill has literally boosted the VI's economy enough that I can move back this winter and not have to wait another year for the wage-scale to return to normal.
GO BP!!!
:awesome:
Quote from: Exit City Hustle on June 18, 2010, 01:57:13 PM
Heh, I'm gonna be that guy who actually has cause to be happy about the oil spill.
What's bad for Florida tourism is great for USVI tourism. The oil spill has literally boosted the VI's economy enough that I can move back this winter and not have to wait another year for the wage-scale to return to normal.
GO BP!!!
:awesome:
They're already noticing a difference?
Also, one of these days I WILL go to St. Thomas and make you be my tour guide.
Yup. The gulf tourism is about 40% what it used to be?
I think I heard that right.
They're losing a lot of business, places are shutting down and people are losing their jobs.
People I know personally who usually go to places over there are staying away.
GO BP!
The thing to do, if it is even possible, is to get tourists to come down to help with clean up AND throw in some fun. You get a 3 day vacation. You spend one day on the beach picking up tar-balls, cleaning off pelicans, collecting boons, whatever, you get some kind of discount on a nearbye resort and then you have 2 days of reduce-priced fun. PLUS, you get to brag to your friends and family how you helped save the Gulf of Mexico. give them t-shirts, mugs, bumper stickers. You play into American's desire to brag about being a part of something AND getting discounts. Voila!
Quote from: RWHN on June 18, 2010, 04:49:57 PM
The thing to do, if it is even possible, is to get tourists to come down to help with clean up AND throw in some fun. You get a 3 day vacation. You spend one day on the beach picking up tar-balls, cleaning off pelicans, collecting boons, whatever, you get some kind of discount on a nearbye resort and then you have 2 days of reduce-priced fun. PLUS, you get to brag to your friends and family how you helped save the Gulf of Mexico. give them t-shirts, mugs, bumper stickers. You play into American's desire to brag about being a part of something AND getting discounts. Voila!
Not only brag but brag about doing something important. "I saved the Atlantic and all I got was this lousy T-shirt"
I could see this being a workable idea.
Someone get rid of Haley Barbour and Charlie Crist and I'll come and get r done!
And the thing is, you don't need to give them back-breaking labor. Give them just enough to do and then you have that much more work to spread around which means that many more tourists. It probably isn't enough to totally avoid losses in tourism, but it might at least keep people employed and some money (read: tax revenue) coming in.
Quote from: RWHN on June 18, 2010, 05:00:13 PM
And the thing is, you don't need to give them back-breaking labor. Give them just enough to do and then you have that much more work to spread around which means that many more tourists. It probably isn't enough to totally avoid losses in tourism, but it might at least keep people employed and some money (read: tax revenue) coming in.
Isn't this what they did with post-Katrina NOLA and other natural disasters around that time?
Come to New Orleans and sample the jazz kitchens while building prefab houses in the Ninth Ward!
And one more thing, President Obama ran on a platform that included civic engagement and working in the community.
Hello? This calamity SCREAMS for that. His office should be leading the charge on this. You gotta know there are tons of people out there who would love to travel down and pitch in. Get a few brains together and come up with a plan to tap into that. The leak isn't going away soon, there has to be plenty of shit to do.
Quote from: Jenne on June 18, 2010, 05:03:44 PM
Quote from: RWHN on June 18, 2010, 05:00:13 PM
And the thing is, you don't need to give them back-breaking labor. Give them just enough to do and then you have that much more work to spread around which means that many more tourists. It probably isn't enough to totally avoid losses in tourism, but it might at least keep people employed and some money (read: tax revenue) coming in.
Isn't this what they did with post-Katrina NOLA and other natural disasters around that time?
Come to New Orleans and sample the jazz kitchens while building prefab houses in the Ninth Ward!
Seems like a no-brainer to me. And it may be this is being done and I just haven't read about it. Entirely possible. I know if I were in a situation where I could just drop work and family responsibilities for a week or two I'd be down there helping.
Quote from: RWHN on June 18, 2010, 05:06:32 PM
Quote from: Jenne on June 18, 2010, 05:03:44 PM
Quote from: RWHN on June 18, 2010, 05:00:13 PM
And the thing is, you don't need to give them back-breaking labor. Give them just enough to do and then you have that much more work to spread around which means that many more tourists. It probably isn't enough to totally avoid losses in tourism, but it might at least keep people employed and some money (read: tax revenue) coming in.
Isn't this what they did with post-Katrina NOLA and other natural disasters around that time?
Come to New Orleans and sample the jazz kitchens while building prefab houses in the Ninth Ward!
Seems like a no-brainer to me. And it may be this is being done and I just haven't read about it. Entirely possible. I know if I were in a situation where I could just drop work and family responsibilities for a week or two I'd be down there helping.
Once my kids are older, I know my husband will be in Medicins Sans Frontiers in a heartbeat...
The idea sounds genius!
Only problem is that stuff is really toxic, they don't want the public near it without proper protection, it's making people sick.
Oh, did you hear that they were telling the clean up crews not to wear their protective gear because they didn't want to frighten the public? They didn't want people to know just how dangerous this crap is so they told em, wear the suits and you're fired. Nice, huh?
GO BP!
Quote from: Turdley Burgleson on June 18, 2010, 05:23:48 PM
The idea sounds genius!
Only problem is that stuff is really toxic, they don't want the public near it without proper protection, it's making people sick.
Oh, did you hear that they were telling the clean up crews not to wear their protective gear because they didn't want to frighten the public? They didn't want people to know just how dangerous this crap is so they told em, wear the suits and you're fired. Nice, huh?
GO BP!
Hmmm. Put your own workers at risk and keep the public ignorant. Nice.
Quote from: Turdley Burgleson on June 18, 2010, 05:23:48 PM
The idea sounds genius!
Only problem is that stuff is really toxic, they don't want the public near it without proper protection, it's making people sick.
Oh, did you hear that they were telling the clean up crews not to wear their protective gear because they didn't want to frighten the public? They didn't want people to know just how dangerous this crap is so they told em, wear the suits and you're fired. Nice, huh?
GO BP!
Yeah, Olbermann was reporting on that a couple of days ago. And you are right about the hazards of handling and collecting the oil. But I think there would probably be enough support-type jobs that the average citizen could do, that would allow more time for the professionals to handle the particularly dirty and nasty jobs.
Quote from: RWHN on June 18, 2010, 05:05:00 PM
And one more thing, President Obama ran on a platform that included civic engagement and working in the community.
Hello? This calamity SCREAMS for that. His office should be leading the charge on this. You gotta know there are tons of people out there who would love to travel down and pitch in. Get a few brains together and come up with a plan to tap into that. The leak isn't going away soon, there has to be plenty of shit to do.
I'd honestly love to help with the cleanup (I've got nothing better to do), but there's a few problems, like, I'm in Minnesota and can't afford to travel to the gulf (at least not if I also want to eat). This one's more selfish, but I also don't want to leave the SOs here and I am NOT taking two transsexuals to Louisiana.
Why not?? Louisianna is where transexuals come from!
Wait... That's an oil spill? And here I was thinking that Zalgo was taking a refreshing swim...
Quote from: Turdley Burgleson on June 18, 2010, 10:05:04 PM
Why not?? Louisianna is where transexuals come from!
Let's put it this way, in Minnesota, they can use the bathroom of their gender, in Louisiana, they'd get arrested.
Oil spill = less shellfish = less chance of ruining a kosher diet = greater spiritual purity.
Go BP!
Added bonus, killing the poisonous mercury-laden fish.
BP, looking out for the pregnant ladies and ladies who wish to become pregnant.
Quote from: Requia ☣ on June 17, 2010, 09:49:17 PM
Reuters is full of shit, oil rig workers giving to Obama doesn't count as BP giving to Obama.
That said, according to Reuters' source it looks like while BP hasn't given its own money to campaigns or PACs anymore, they set up a PAC fund that still has money to give out, about $200,000 a year. So yeah, BP is gaming the system.
In your haste to discredit the source, you may have failed to notice Reuters did not claim the money was being to Obama by BP, the Center for Responsive Politics did. You may know them from their website, OpenSecrets.org. I'm sure if you emailed them to point out the flaws in their analysis and conclusion, they will give it all the merit it is due.
Unless you're just obsfucating for the sake of it, in which case they'll likely just dismiss you as another crank.
Quote from: Turdley Burgleson on June 18, 2010, 10:05:04 PM
Why not?? Louisianna is where transexuals come from!
I personally volunteer to scrub the oil off of the trannies. :fap:
Quote from: Suu on June 18, 2010, 02:00:26 PM
Quote from: Exit City Hustle on June 18, 2010, 01:57:13 PM
Heh, I'm gonna be that guy who actually has cause to be happy about the oil spill.
What's bad for Florida tourism is great for USVI tourism. The oil spill has literally boosted the VI's economy enough that I can move back this winter and not have to wait another year for the wage-scale to return to normal.
GO BP!!!
:awesome:
They're already noticing a difference?
Also, one of these days I WILL go to St. Thomas and make you be my tour guide.
Yup. Resort bookings are up 12% over last winter, when everybody was forecasting a 5 or 6% increase.
Once again Cram, your satire is undercut by reality:
http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/archives/2010/06/joe_barton_bp_a.php
QuoteWhen the Texas Congressman apologized to BP for President Obama's unseemly acceptance of a $20 billion settlement with the oil company, even his own party ran screaming from his remarks.
But rightbloggers stayed true to their character: If getting over the Barton PR debacle involved cutting Obama some slack, they just couldn't do it. They'd rather drown.
The Gulf oil spill has been exciting to rightbloggers. No, not because they give a shit about the environment -- come on! These are conservatives we're talking about! -- but because it gave them a chance to pull a double-Katrina on President Obama, thereby avenging the Bush New Orleans debacle.
This strategy showed some signs of traction until Barton spoiled it Thursday by publicly apologizing to BP. His mouth-fart stank the joint up so bad that even his fellow Republicans recoiled from it.
But rightbloggers, bless them, stuck with the story that the BP deal was a "shakedown," They could hardly do otherwise. He was singing from a hymnal they'd already written.
Since before Obama became President, one of the many stops on the rightbloggers' Mighty Wurlitzer has been the notion that, being from Chicago (setting for The Untouchables and other gangster films), Obama is himself a gangster.
Google, at this writing, returns 86,700 results for "Obama" and "Chicago Way," nearly all of them hitting this theme (e.g., "Obama's 'Chicago Way' plunders the private sector").
Obama has been accused of performing all manner of Chicago-style crimes, including shakedowns -- sometimes in cartoons, and sometimes in their literary equivalents.
"Obama using classic Chicago shakedown to rescue his south side buddies at Shorebank/Chicago by extorting Goldman Sachs," declared a CBS MarketWatch discussion. "The Windy City Olympic Shakedown," Michelle Malkin called Obama's attempt to get Chicago the 2016 Olympics. A Hot Air story about Obama and ACORN was called "Anatomy of a Shakedown." Etc.
So when it was reported that Obama had cut a deal with the leaky oil company -- that is, he had succeeded at something -- Plan B went into full effect.
"As I write this Monday night," said former Nixon speechwriter Ben Stein in the American Spectator last week, "there are rumors around that BP will agree to President Barack Obama's demand that the oil giant 'voluntarily' put about $30 billion into a fund to be administered by the government to compensate victims of the Gulf of Mexico oil disaster." Stein referred to the President as a "Caudillo" and a "Duce," and said "Mr. Obama's demand was in the nature of a threat... Is there anyone in Congress to stop him?"
And the moment the BP deal was announced, GOP Representative Tom Price of the Republican Study Committee issued a statement calling it a "Chicago-Style Shakedown."
Now, this was just a press release and a publication in the rightwing equivalent of a trade journal -- a tonic for the troops, not a talking point. The GOP probably expected its major players to keep this one on the down-low, exciting true believers without alienating outsiders. After all, this was an oil company they were talking about -- and surely even the true believers amongst them understood that the American people were not in love with oil companies.
But at the Congressional hearings on Thursday, for whatever reason, Joe Barton, an oil industry puppet from Texas, rose to Ben Stein's challenge. He echoed the "shakedown" line and apologized for it on behalf of a stupefied America to the despised oil company.
Maybe he'd just had a lousy morning. Maybe he'd been programmed badly, and had short-circuited. Whatever the cause, there was no hiding it -- especially with the GOP now loaded with like-minded nuts. "Some Republicans consider BP deal a US 'shakedown,'" announced Reuters, as other GOP fringies such as Michele Bachmann jumped to stand with Barton.
Rightbloggers were go! The American Spectator highlighted the Obama-gangster theme, claiming Obama "has no authority" to enter into such a deal with BP -- just as he had no authority "to cram down Chrysler and GM bond holders for the benefit of the UAW. Law is irrelevant, probably not even considered as an afterthought, by this president."
It's a wonder they didn't whistle down a cop -- but wait, Obama may have bought them off too! Chicago rulez!
"To Obama & Co the BP disaster was music to their ears," said Renew America, "and it is rumored that Obama Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel is searching for a songwriter to put music to the title 'Never let a serious crisis go to waste.'"
This Rahm Emanuel quote is a favorite of rightbloggers who seem to think it means something more sinister than ordinary politics. Texas GOP Vote, for example, big backers of Barton, strongly pushed the same angle ("It is a policy of this administration to 'never let a crisis go to waste,' and the Obama 'Oil Spill' speech was a classic Obama performance in which he went from let's plug that hole to let's save the planet." The bastard!). So did the Senate Republican Committee, who put out a video connecting Emanuel's quote not only to the BP deal, but also to universal health care and other abuses of power.
Bliss it was to be alive then! But the Republican establishment, perhaps dazed by the negative reaction, forced Barton to back off his comments.
You'd think rightbloggers, being on the internet and all, would have quickly figured out that this argument wasn't catching fire, and retrenched to one of their other hobby-horses -- Obama's hatred of white people, perhaps, or the socialism of Teddy Roosevelt.
But you'd be wrong! Some rightbloggers did admit that Barton's wording had been perhaps a trifle unfortunate. But by and large, they remained committed to the Lost Cause.
http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Thick-oily-sludge-hits-Florida-beach/ss/events/us/062410pensacolaoil
You know, I'm really having a bit of trouble laughing. Something's probably wrong with my throat.
OH MY GOD SOMEBODY SAVE THOSE SHOES!!!!!!!1
Quote from: Cain on June 21, 2010, 05:04:30 PM
Quote from: Requia ☣ on June 17, 2010, 09:49:17 PM
Reuters is full of shit, oil rig workers giving to Obama doesn't count as BP giving to Obama.
That said, according to Reuters' source it looks like while BP hasn't given its own money to campaigns or PACs anymore, they set up a PAC fund that still has money to give out, about $200,000 a year. So yeah, BP is gaming the system.
In your haste to discredit the source, you may have failed to notice Reuters did not claim the money was being to Obama by BP, the Center for Responsive Politics did. You may know them from their website, OpenSecrets.org. I'm sure if you emailed them to point out the flaws in their analysis and conclusion, they will give it all the merit it is due.
Unless you're just obsfucating for the sake of it, in which case they'll likely just dismiss you as another crank.
Um, who do you think I was talking about when I said Rueters' source? According to the CRP, direct contributions from BP is zilch. Employee contributions are ambiguous, at best, Rueters also failed to mention the PAC that BP is still funneling money through.
shut the FUCK up and SAVE THOSE GOLD SHOES!!!!!!
I wonder if there will be pr0n in which the money shot is the chick's face getting spattered with thick black crude. I'm positive there would be money in that.
Quote from: Cramulus on June 25, 2010, 02:23:22 PM
I wonder if there will be pr0n in which the money shot is the chick's face getting spattered with thick black crude. I'm positive there would be money in that.
Oooh, Chris Korda should make a sequel to
I like to Watch based on that premise!
[people that don't know it, it's a music video + electro track that compares the media spectacle around 9/11 to watching sports games and porn. "I like to watch. The plane going in. I like to watch. The flame shooting out. My steel melting, as my tower is coming down."--it's so tasteless, it is good]