It's always the drugs, Jim.
You walk down the street, and you're surrounded by people doing crazy things. Spouses arguing with each other, making their opposite number hate them for no reason other than to win. Some dumbass shooting another dumbass because he felt he was disrespected (because prison guards respect you, dumbshit), some ignorant fuck having a "Tucson moment" because he thought his Hummer2 made him invincible in traffic. You know what I mean.
But the world can't be that crazy, Jim, it's just not possible, is it? No, it has to be the pills. It has to be the drugs making you think that Tucson creeps into every facet of daily life, making things horrible and weird, and usually in a bad way. It has to be the pharmaceuticals that made that off-duty police detective cry into his whiskey the other day, out of sheer frustration.
He hadn't even started drinking yet, and there he was, crying and repeating "It isn't supposed to be this way. We had a lid on things, and they laid all the uniforms off and the desk sergeant is selling go-pills to the ones that are left, because they work 12 hours instead of 8 now, and the bodies are starting to pile up again, just like the bad old days."
What the hell do you say to that, Jim?
You don't, of course. That's just the whiskey talking, even though he was still contemplating his first drink of the night.
It's just the drugs that make you think that Tucson is seedy and horrible and filthy, and if you cut back a bit, maybe things wouldn't look so fucking run down, and maybe you'd stop noticing the people waiting.
They wait, Jim, or it seems they do, for hours or days or years or their whole lives. That overweight kid waiting in front of the video store he works at (You can tell by his shirt)? The store closed 3 hours ago, and he's still waiting with his sad little backpack on his lap. He looks like he expects to wait a lot longer.
Everyone here seems to be waiting for whatever it is they're waiting for, and you want to grab them and shake them and say "YOUR LIFE IS PASSING YOU BY! DO SOMETHING WHILE YOU WAIT!"...But they won't. They'll just wait, because that's how the Spider has them programmed.
And if you weren't so fucked up on drugs, you wouldn't notice or care. It's someone else's problem, after all, and you have a busy day.
It's always the drugs, Jim.
Okay for now,
Dok
For some reason this made me sad.
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:23:47 PM
For some reason this made me sad.
I don't know why. It's upbeat as fuck. Perhaps you should increase your dose.
It gave me a vision of grabbing one of them by the shoulders and screaming for them to wake up, and getting a blank smile back as they ask me if I need a hug.
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:28:42 PM
It gave me a vision of grabbing one of them by the shoulders and screaming for them to wake up, and getting a blank smile back as they ask me if I need a hug.
Try asking a cop (here) how his day went. You'll get a different reaction altogether.
They must be taking different drugs.
I don't want to get shot.
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:32:10 PM
I don't want to get shot.
They won't shoot you. They may fire in your general direction, but they're too blinded by tears to aim.
They're waiting, Dok, for The End. The Spiders may have promised them HappinessTM, but they know better, especially in Tucson. They've given up, and are waiting for Tucson to get around to eating them, because there's nothing left for them, or so they think. So that guy sitting in front of his work, three hours after it closed, he was waiting very patiently for something to happen to him, so that he could finally stop having to worry about family, friends, work, money and bills, what to do with his spare time, how to manage the things that have claimed his tie, how skinny this actress is and how fat that one is, which famous guy got a DUI this week, who is winning on America's Got Talent, and the list goes on forever. It's a steady spiral, and that steadiness can teach a person patience like nothing else can. Except they're all waiting to hit bottom. To end. Because that's what we were REALLY promised. We just have to wait for it.
Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not going to waste my time waiting around for anything. I hear some people at the Meetrack know where we can find some saline injection freaks.
You coming, Dok?
When did they cut the force back? And why?
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:35:33 PM
They're waiting, Dok, for The End. The Spiders may have promised them HappinessTM, but they know better, especially in Tucson. They've given up, and are waiting for Tucson to get around to eating them, because there's nothing left for them, or so they think. So that guy sitting in front of his work, three hours after it closed, he was waiting very patiently for something to happen to him, so that he could finally stop having to worry about family, friends, work, money and bills, what to do with his spare time, how to manage the things that have claimed his tie, how skinny this actress is and how fat that one is, which famous guy got a DUI this week, who is winning on America's Got Talent, and the list goes on forever. It's a steady spiral, and that steadiness can teach a person patience like nothing else can. Except they're all waiting to hit bottom. To end. Because that's what we were REALLY promised. We just have to wait for it.
Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not going to waste my time waiting around for anything. I hear some people at the Meetrack know where we can find some saline injection freaks.
You coming, Dok?
Fuck yeah, I am.
I can't blame that kid, either. I mean, it's not like I haven't dared Tucson to eat me a time or twelve.
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:37:04 PM
When did they cut the force back? And why?
Funding from the state was cut because Tucson isn't doing its part to combat the Brown Menace™.
They've cut 133 cops so far, and this month they're cutting 200 more. So that's 111 uniforms/shift, and homocide may also have to handle vice, which they aren't really trained for.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:42:23 PM
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:37:04 PM
When did they cut the force back? And why?
Funding from the state was cut because Tucson isn't doing its part to combat the Brown Menace™.
They've cut 133 cops so far, and this month they're cutting 200 more. So that's 111 uniforms/shift, and homocide may also have to handle vice, which they aren't really trained for.
Holy shit. Consider getting the fuck out.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:40:51 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:35:33 PM
They're waiting, Dok, for The End. The Spiders may have promised them HappinessTM, but they know better, especially in Tucson. They've given up, and are waiting for Tucson to get around to eating them, because there's nothing left for them, or so they think. So that guy sitting in front of his work, three hours after it closed, he was waiting very patiently for something to happen to him, so that he could finally stop having to worry about family, friends, work, money and bills, what to do with his spare time, how to manage the things that have claimed his tie, how skinny this actress is and how fat that one is, which famous guy got a DUI this week, who is winning on America's Got Talent, and the list goes on forever. It's a steady spiral, and that steadiness can teach a person patience like nothing else can. Except they're all waiting to hit bottom. To end. Because that's what we were REALLY promised. We just have to wait for it.
Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not going to waste my time waiting around for anything. I hear some people at the Meetrack know where we can find some saline injection freaks.
You coming, Dok?
Fuck yeah, I am.
I can't blame that kid, either. I mean, it's not like I haven't dared Tucson to eat me a time or twelve.
The thing is, it doesn't seem to matter if you're quick OR slow, does it. If Tucson wants to eat you, all you have to do is surprise it. If it moves in slow, then you have to recognize it, and jump the fuck out of the way at the very last second, jump in that beat up old jeep, and drive like the Devil himself is on your tail. If it comes in quick, slow the fuck down so that it just misses you, as it was aiming to catch you going faster than that. This City can bear down on you like a train, and playing chicken with it is a pretty dangerous sport, but if you're strong enough, you can go into the next round without too many new scars.
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:43:29 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:42:23 PM
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:37:04 PM
When did they cut the force back? And why?
Funding from the state was cut because Tucson isn't doing its part to combat the Brown Menace™.
They've cut 133 cops so far, and this month they're cutting 200 more. So that's 111 uniforms/shift, and homocide may also have to handle vice, which they aren't really trained for.
Holy shit. Consider getting the fuck out.
Okay, thought about it.
Like I'm gonna give up a front row seat. :lulz:
I mean, fuck, how many people have answered this thread? How many people have posted in the TCC abortion in OMF? With the exception of you and Freeky, everyone I come to PD to see has either become addicted to a pack of smelly fucking Wiccans, or has stopped posting.
And I'm going to get my entertainment somewhere. If not at PD, then maybe at 12th and Ajo.
Damn, Freeky. Your writing style has really progressed. That was awesome.
It seems like The Spider™ has been around for so long, we've begun breeding ourselves for it's dinner. That bastard used to have to snare us, trap us, wrap us up tight, and even then it would take years for it to poison us, drain our bodies of life and hope. Now, it seems like most of us openly walk into the web, find an open space in the threads, and then lay down quietly, waiting for our turn, waiting for the cool sting of fangs sinking below the skin.
Which makes it that more dangerous for those who try to escape. It's easier to spot a runaway when the rest of the crowd is limping in the opposite direction.
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:45:36 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:40:51 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:35:33 PM
They're waiting, Dok, for The End. The Spiders may have promised them HappinessTM, but they know better, especially in Tucson. They've given up, and are waiting for Tucson to get around to eating them, because there's nothing left for them, or so they think. So that guy sitting in front of his work, three hours after it closed, he was waiting very patiently for something to happen to him, so that he could finally stop having to worry about family, friends, work, money and bills, what to do with his spare time, how to manage the things that have claimed his tie, how skinny this actress is and how fat that one is, which famous guy got a DUI this week, who is winning on America's Got Talent, and the list goes on forever. It's a steady spiral, and that steadiness can teach a person patience like nothing else can. Except they're all waiting to hit bottom. To end. Because that's what we were REALLY promised. We just have to wait for it.
Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not going to waste my time waiting around for anything. I hear some people at the Meetrack know where we can find some saline injection freaks.
You coming, Dok?
Fuck yeah, I am.
I can't blame that kid, either. I mean, it's not like I haven't dared Tucson to eat me a time or twelve.
The thing is, it doesn't seem to matter if you're quick OR slow, does it. If Tucson wants to eat you, all you have to do is surprise it. If it moves in slow, then you have to recognize it, and jump the fuck out of the way at the very last second, jump in that beat up old jeep, and drive like the Devil himself is on your tail. If it comes in quick, slow the fuck down so that it just misses you, as it was aiming to catch you going faster than that. This City can bear down on you like a train, and playing chicken with it is a pretty dangerous sport, but if you're strong enough, you can go into the next round without too many new scars.
Unless you're HERE, in which case you get a constant deluge of meaningless phone calls and meetings, and shitbags that think a closed office door means "walk right in, my time is of no value". Having put up with that for the last horrible 3 weeks, I have decided that today, my time really ISN'T valuable, and I'm going to fuck off the rest of the day.
I'm mad as fuck right now, at everyone on the property, and if Tucson wishes to eat me now, I fucking DOUBLE DOG DARE IT TO TRY! MEET ME OUT BEHIND THE ACID SHED, TUCSON, AND WE'LL SETTLE THIS SHIT.
I love the fact that you, in fact, really do have acid sheds.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:47:06 PM
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:43:29 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:42:23 PM
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 07:37:04 PM
When did they cut the force back? And why?
Funding from the state was cut because Tucson isn't doing its part to combat the Brown Menace™.
They've cut 133 cops so far, and this month they're cutting 200 more. So that's 111 uniforms/shift, and homocide may also have to handle vice, which they aren't really trained for.
Holy shit. Consider getting the fuck out.
Okay, thought about it.
Like I'm gonna give up a front row seat. :lulz:
I mean, fuck, how many people have answered this thread? How many people have posted in the TCC abortion in OMF? With the exception of you and Freeky, everyone I come to PD to see has either become addicted to a pack of smelly fucking Wiccans, or has stopped posting.
And I'm going to get my entertainment somewhere. If not at PD, then maybe at 12th and Ajo.
:lulz:
I honestly don't think I've even looked at that thread. No plans to either.
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:51:23 PM
Damn, Freeky. Your writing style has really progressed. That was awesome.
Freeky's writing is amazing.
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:51:23 PM
It seems like The Spider™ has been around for so long, we've begun breeding ourselves for it's dinner. That bastard used to have to snare us, trap us, wrap us up tight, and even then it would take years for it to poison us, drain our bodies of life and hope. Now, it seems like most of us openly walk into the web, find an open space in the threads, and then lay down quietly, waiting for our turn, waiting for the cool sting of fangs sinking below the skin.
Which makes it that more dangerous for those who try to escape. It's easier to spot a runaway when the rest of the crowd is limping in the opposite direction.
What's really odd is that the natural state of any given person's mind is so fucked up here that being OFF of drugs is considered abberant.
And since you can't escape Tucson anyway, you may as well enjoy the show. Freeky and I frequently just drive or walk around, looking at the non-stop horror show that Tucson has become in the last couple of years, and particularly in the last couple of months. Then we go to horrible biker/pervert bars and try to wash our eyeballs out with cheap booze in small quantities.
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:52:38 PM
I love the fact that you, in fact, really do have acid sheds.
We have many acid sheds. My department, though, has only one. And Tucson is free to meet me back there whenever it wants to...And if this turns out to be nothing but superstition, then the faceless empty void is free to meet me back there. I'll fucking its shit royally.
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:51:23 PM
Damn, Freeky. Your writing style has really progressed. That was awesome.
It seems like The Spider™ has been around for so long, we've begun breeding ourselves for it's dinner. That bastard used to have to snare us, trap us, wrap us up tight, and even then it would take years for it to poison us, drain our bodies of life and hope. Now, it seems like most of us openly walk into the web, find an open space in the threads, and then lay down quietly, waiting for our turn, waiting for the cool sting of fangs sinking below the skin.
Which makes it that more dangerous for those who try to escape. It's easier to spot a runaway when the rest of the crowd is limping in the opposite direction.
Be light, so light on your feet! Dodge and weave as the Greys plod helplessly, hopelessly, listlessly towards the recommended dosage, giggling like a maddened school girl the whole way. Just keep in mind it's easier to look like a fool, pirouetting to avoid them and capering on, than to bump into them and have your stride fouled.
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:59:27 PM
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:51:23 PM
Damn, Freeky. Your writing style has really progressed. That was awesome.
It seems like The Spider™ has been around for so long, we've begun breeding ourselves for it's dinner. That bastard used to have to snare us, trap us, wrap us up tight, and even then it would take years for it to poison us, drain our bodies of life and hope. Now, it seems like most of us openly walk into the web, find an open space in the threads, and then lay down quietly, waiting for our turn, waiting for the cool sting of fangs sinking below the skin.
Which makes it that more dangerous for those who try to escape. It's easier to spot a runaway when the rest of the crowd is limping in the opposite direction.
Be light, so light on your feet! Dodge and weave as the Greys plod helplessly, hopelessly, listlessly towards the recommended dosage, giggling like a maddened school girl the whole way. Just keep in mind it's easier to look like a fool, pirouetting to avoid them and capering on, than to bump into them and have your stride fouled.
I fear you have become infected. There is no cure.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:51:30 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:45:36 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:40:51 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:35:33 PM
They're waiting, Dok, for The End. The Spiders may have promised them HappinessTM, but they know better, especially in Tucson. They've given up, and are waiting for Tucson to get around to eating them, because there's nothing left for them, or so they think. So that guy sitting in front of his work, three hours after it closed, he was waiting very patiently for something to happen to him, so that he could finally stop having to worry about family, friends, work, money and bills, what to do with his spare time, how to manage the things that have claimed his tie, how skinny this actress is and how fat that one is, which famous guy got a DUI this week, who is winning on America's Got Talent, and the list goes on forever. It's a steady spiral, and that steadiness can teach a person patience like nothing else can. Except they're all waiting to hit bottom. To end. Because that's what we were REALLY promised. We just have to wait for it.
Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not going to waste my time waiting around for anything. I hear some people at the Meetrack know where we can find some saline injection freaks.
You coming, Dok?
Fuck yeah, I am.
I can't blame that kid, either. I mean, it's not like I haven't dared Tucson to eat me a time or twelve.
The thing is, it doesn't seem to matter if you're quick OR slow, does it. If Tucson wants to eat you, all you have to do is surprise it. If it moves in slow, then you have to recognize it, and jump the fuck out of the way at the very last second, jump in that beat up old jeep, and drive like the Devil himself is on your tail. If it comes in quick, slow the fuck down so that it just misses you, as it was aiming to catch you going faster than that. This City can bear down on you like a train, and playing chicken with it is a pretty dangerous sport, but if you're strong enough, you can go into the next round without too many new scars.
Unless you're HERE, in which case you get a constant deluge of meaningless phone calls and meetings, and shitbags that think a closed office door means "walk right in, my time is of no value". Having put up with that for the last horrible 3 weeks, I have decided that today, my time really ISN'T valuable, and I'm going to fuck off the rest of the day.
I'm mad as fuck right now, at everyone on the property, and if Tucson wishes to eat me now, I fucking DOUBLE DOG DARE IT TO TRY! MEET ME OUT BEHIND THE ACID SHED, TUCSON, AND WE'LL SETTLE THIS SHIT.
Would that I could back you up. I'll fucking anyone if they want to step. You, me, and the Meathammah vs. the only thing I could ever consider a deific presence? I wouldn't put a dollar on Tucson, no sirree.
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 08:00:38 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:59:27 PM
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:51:23 PM
Damn, Freeky. Your writing style has really progressed. That was awesome.
It seems like The Spider™ has been around for so long, we've begun breeding ourselves for it's dinner. That bastard used to have to snare us, trap us, wrap us up tight, and even then it would take years for it to poison us, drain our bodies of life and hope. Now, it seems like most of us openly walk into the web, find an open space in the threads, and then lay down quietly, waiting for our turn, waiting for the cool sting of fangs sinking below the skin.
Which makes it that more dangerous for those who try to escape. It's easier to spot a runaway when the rest of the crowd is limping in the opposite direction.
Be light, so light on your feet! Dodge and weave as the Greys plod helplessly, hopelessly, listlessly towards the recommended dosage, giggling like a maddened school girl the whole way. Just keep in mind it's easier to look like a fool, pirouetting to avoid them and capering on, than to bump into them and have your stride fouled.
I fear you have become infected. There is no cure.
But would you want one, even if it was available? I mean, she COULD go back to watching teevee with a straight face, and worrying about what the neighbors think, or sinking into the mass of apathy and abject misery that Tucson represents. But why?
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 08:01:52 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:51:30 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:45:36 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:40:51 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:35:33 PM
They're waiting, Dok, for The End. The Spiders may have promised them HappinessTM, but they know better, especially in Tucson. They've given up, and are waiting for Tucson to get around to eating them, because there's nothing left for them, or so they think. So that guy sitting in front of his work, three hours after it closed, he was waiting very patiently for something to happen to him, so that he could finally stop having to worry about family, friends, work, money and bills, what to do with his spare time, how to manage the things that have claimed his tie, how skinny this actress is and how fat that one is, which famous guy got a DUI this week, who is winning on America's Got Talent, and the list goes on forever. It's a steady spiral, and that steadiness can teach a person patience like nothing else can. Except they're all waiting to hit bottom. To end. Because that's what we were REALLY promised. We just have to wait for it.
Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not going to waste my time waiting around for anything. I hear some people at the Meetrack know where we can find some saline injection freaks.
You coming, Dok?
Fuck yeah, I am.
I can't blame that kid, either. I mean, it's not like I haven't dared Tucson to eat me a time or twelve.
The thing is, it doesn't seem to matter if you're quick OR slow, does it. If Tucson wants to eat you, all you have to do is surprise it. If it moves in slow, then you have to recognize it, and jump the fuck out of the way at the very last second, jump in that beat up old jeep, and drive like the Devil himself is on your tail. If it comes in quick, slow the fuck down so that it just misses you, as it was aiming to catch you going faster than that. This City can bear down on you like a train, and playing chicken with it is a pretty dangerous sport, but if you're strong enough, you can go into the next round without too many new scars.
Unless you're HERE, in which case you get a constant deluge of meaningless phone calls and meetings, and shitbags that think a closed office door means "walk right in, my time is of no value". Having put up with that for the last horrible 3 weeks, I have decided that today, my time really ISN'T valuable, and I'm going to fuck off the rest of the day.
I'm mad as fuck right now, at everyone on the property, and if Tucson wishes to eat me now, I fucking DOUBLE DOG DARE IT TO TRY! MEET ME OUT BEHIND THE ACID SHED, TUCSON, AND WE'LL SETTLE THIS SHIT.
Would that I could back you up. I'll fucking anyone if they want to step. You, me, and the Meathammah vs. the only thing I could ever consider a deific presence? I wouldn't put a dollar on Tucson, no sirree.
Well, obviously. Because if we lose, we can't collect. :lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 08:02:20 PM
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 13, 2010, 08:00:38 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:59:27 PM
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:51:23 PM
Damn, Freeky. Your writing style has really progressed. That was awesome.
It seems like The Spider™ has been around for so long, we've begun breeding ourselves for it's dinner. That bastard used to have to snare us, trap us, wrap us up tight, and even then it would take years for it to poison us, drain our bodies of life and hope. Now, it seems like most of us openly walk into the web, find an open space in the threads, and then lay down quietly, waiting for our turn, waiting for the cool sting of fangs sinking below the skin.
Which makes it that more dangerous for those who try to escape. It's easier to spot a runaway when the rest of the crowd is limping in the opposite direction.
Be light, so light on your feet! Dodge and weave as the Greys plod helplessly, hopelessly, listlessly towards the recommended dosage, giggling like a maddened school girl the whole way. Just keep in mind it's easier to look like a fool, pirouetting to avoid them and capering on, than to bump into them and have your stride fouled.
I fear you have become infected. There is no cure.
But would you want one, even if it was available? I mean, she COULD go back to watching teevee with a straight face, and worrying about what the neighbors think, or sinking into the mass of apathy and abject misery that Tucson represents. But why?
No siree, no cure wanted.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:55:21 PM
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:51:23 PM
Damn, Freeky. Your writing style has really progressed. That was awesome.
Freeky's writing is amazing.
You guys. :oops: <3
Quote
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on September 13, 2010, 07:51:23 PM
It seems like The Spider™ has been around for so long, we've begun breeding ourselves for it's dinner. That bastard used to have to snare us, trap us, wrap us up tight, and even then it would take years for it to poison us, drain our bodies of life and hope. Now, it seems like most of us openly walk into the web, find an open space in the threads, and then lay down quietly, waiting for our turn, waiting for the cool sting of fangs sinking below the skin.
Which makes it that more dangerous for those who try to escape. It's easier to spot a runaway when the rest of the crowd is limping in the opposite direction.
What's really odd is that the natural state of any given person's mind is so fucked up here that being OFF of drugs is considered abberant.
And since you can't escape Tucson anyway, you may as well enjoy the show. Freeky and I frequently just drive or walk around, looking at the non-stop horror show that Tucson has become in the last couple of years, and particularly in the last couple of months. Then we go to horrible biker/pervert bars and try to wash our eyeballs out with cheap booze in small quantities.
And then bask in the over-brightened street, where neon signs advertising hourly room rates and "GIRLS XXX" and expensive booze and hipster joints flicker and buzz with the intensity of the noonday sun, though it won't give you as much cancer as the real sun.
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 08:07:21 PM
And then bask in the over-brightened street, where neon signs advertising hourly room rates and "GIRLS XXX" and expensive booze and hipster joints flicker and buzz with the intensity of the noonday sun, though it won't give you as much cancer as the real sun.
We don't need any more cancer. This town has the most haggard, depressed, and tired looking strippers, etc, that I've ever seen. The sex trade here, at all levels, is already worn out by the time it's time to go to work, just from the heat.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:47:06 PM
I mean, fuck, how many people have answered this thread? How many people have posted in the TCC abortion in OMF? With the exception of you and Freeky, everyone I come to PD to see has either become addicted to a pack of smelly fucking Wiccans, or has stopped posting.
And I'm going to get my entertainment somewhere. If not at PD, then maybe at 12th and Ajo.
yeah, I wish I had a good response to that but the truth is, I've pretty much been co-opted, and between the big increase in my personal income, the HUGE increase in how interesting my life is, and the access to knowing things I'm not supposed to know, I'm
happy about being co-opted. And I still consider you (and several of the people here) a good friend and I look forward to causing some mayhem and shooting things with you in my off-time someday, but since I can't talk about all the interesting shit, I tend to end up not saying much at all. And I'm not apologizing because, again, I
like where my life has ended up, but sometimes I feel like I owe an explanation.
also, 12th and Garlic? :lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 08:02:57 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 08:01:52 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:51:30 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:45:36 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:40:51 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 07:35:33 PM
They're waiting, Dok, for The End. The Spiders may have promised them HappinessTM, but they know better, especially in Tucson. They've given up, and are waiting for Tucson to get around to eating them, because there's nothing left for them, or so they think. So that guy sitting in front of his work, three hours after it closed, he was waiting very patiently for something to happen to him, so that he could finally stop having to worry about family, friends, work, money and bills, what to do with his spare time, how to manage the things that have claimed his tie, how skinny this actress is and how fat that one is, which famous guy got a DUI this week, who is winning on America's Got Talent, and the list goes on forever. It's a steady spiral, and that steadiness can teach a person patience like nothing else can. Except they're all waiting to hit bottom. To end. Because that's what we were REALLY promised. We just have to wait for it.
Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not going to waste my time waiting around for anything. I hear some people at the Meetrack know where we can find some saline injection freaks.
You coming, Dok?
Fuck yeah, I am.
I can't blame that kid, either. I mean, it's not like I haven't dared Tucson to eat me a time or twelve.
The thing is, it doesn't seem to matter if you're quick OR slow, does it. If Tucson wants to eat you, all you have to do is surprise it. If it moves in slow, then you have to recognize it, and jump the fuck out of the way at the very last second, jump in that beat up old jeep, and drive like the Devil himself is on your tail. If it comes in quick, slow the fuck down so that it just misses you, as it was aiming to catch you going faster than that. This City can bear down on you like a train, and playing chicken with it is a pretty dangerous sport, but if you're strong enough, you can go into the next round without too many new scars.
Unless you're HERE, in which case you get a constant deluge of meaningless phone calls and meetings, and shitbags that think a closed office door means "walk right in, my time is of no value". Having put up with that for the last horrible 3 weeks, I have decided that today, my time really ISN'T valuable, and I'm going to fuck off the rest of the day.
I'm mad as fuck right now, at everyone on the property, and if Tucson wishes to eat me now, I fucking DOUBLE DOG DARE IT TO TRY! MEET ME OUT BEHIND THE ACID SHED, TUCSON, AND WE'LL SETTLE THIS SHIT.
Would that I could back you up. I'll fucking anyone if they want to step. You, me, and the Meathammah vs. the only thing I could ever consider a deific presence? I wouldn't put a dollar on Tucson, no sirree.
Well, obviously. Because if we lose, we can't collect. :lulz:
PLEASE TO THINK POSITIVE! OR I WILL TELL NURSE ENABLER AND BRING THE MEATHAMMAH!
Quote from: Exit City Hustle on September 13, 2010, 08:16:12 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:47:06 PM
I mean, fuck, how many people have answered this thread? How many people have posted in the TCC abortion in OMF? With the exception of you and Freeky, everyone I come to PD to see has either become addicted to a pack of smelly fucking Wiccans, or has stopped posting.
And I'm going to get my entertainment somewhere. If not at PD, then maybe at 12th and Ajo.
yeah, I wish I had a good response to that but the truth is, I've pretty much been co-opted, and between the big increase in my personal income, the HUGE increase in how interesting my life is, and the access to knowing things I'm not supposed to know, I'm happy about being co-opted. And I still consider you (and several of the people here) a good friend and I look forward to causing some mayhem and shooting things with you in my off-time someday, but since I can't talk about all the interesting shit, I tend to end up not saying much at all. And I'm not apologizing because, again, I like where my life has ended up, but sometimes I feel like I owe an explanation.
also, 12th and Garlic? :lulz:
1. Oh, no complaints there. Life happens, and far be it from me to bitch about someone getting paid. I'm not pissed, or anything, just feeling like PD died under my feet.
2. Yes. White people using Spanish words badly to name streets is an art form here. I'm waiting to see "Calle Pantelones".
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on September 13, 2010, 08:20:08 PM
PLEASE TO THINK POSITIVE! OR I WILL TELL NURSE ENABLER AND BRING THE MEATHAMMAH!
woooooooooooo
You tell people about that fucking Spider, and of course they don't beleive you. The prosaic, the mundane, the every day "This is suppsoed to be happeneing. Everything is udner control.".... I don't even know if it's a platitude or a pill anymore. They're really the same, and they're all pumped out along the same channels.
For some reason, it's jsut this goddamn huge mother of an arachnid doing the deed.
There was this movie awhile back "The Matrix". They started it off with this very Plato "What is reality" style mindfuck. They gave it up though, so everyone could put on sunglasses, black leather, and play "Revenge of the Nerds" with firearms and kung - fu. See, if they'd kept it going with the reality questioning, you could have gotten pretty interesting, and it's a good example of how I feel about the Spider. (yeah, I know, "The Matrix" had big bastard bugs too. Besides the point though.) You can't TELL anyone what it is, you have to clue in and see it yourself.
Neo didn't deal too well with having it revealed to him, yakking all over Laurence Fishburn's hovercraft. Some of us, in "real" life by contrast, have always sort of suspected, so it's more of a rolling case of "Well...Shit."
No freakouts, no vomit.
No kung fu and madghiqual powers either.
Scowl at the Spider like Clint would and keep on walking when it stoops over.
"Hey. You don't have to go through it like that you know. Have one of these. Just try, huh? You can always stop later if you want."
Yeah, like you "just try" meth or smack too. All that's different in the stuff that has the Spider's icons all over it.
(Not an obvious 8 legged thing. Jsut a few here and there. Like it's throwing up 4 different gang signs. "This is approved, this is controlled, don't fuckign copy the funny name, oh yeah you can recycle this bottle.)
I wan
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 08:21:05 PM
Quote from: Exit City Hustle on September 13, 2010, 08:16:12 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:47:06 PM
I mean, fuck, how many people have answered this thread? How many people have posted in the TCC abortion in OMF? With the exception of you and Freeky, everyone I come to PD to see has either become addicted to a pack of smelly fucking Wiccans, or has stopped posting.
And I'm going to get my entertainment somewhere. If not at PD, then maybe at 12th and Ajo.
yeah, I wish I had a good response to that but the truth is, I've pretty much been co-opted, and between the big increase in my personal income, the HUGE increase in how interesting my life is, and the access to knowing things I'm not supposed to know, I'm happy about being co-opted. And I still consider you (and several of the people here) a good friend and I look forward to causing some mayhem and shooting things with you in my off-time someday, but since I can't talk about all the interesting shit, I tend to end up not saying much at all. And I'm not apologizing because, again, I like where my life has ended up, but sometimes I feel like I owe an explanation.
also, 12th and Garlic? :lulz:
1. Oh, no complaints there. Life happens, and far be it from me to bitch about someone getting paid. I'm not pissed, or anything, just feeling like PD died under my feet.
2. Yes. White people using Spanish words badly to name streets is an art form here. I'm waiting to see "Calle Pantelones".
In my defense, I have never once posted at TCC, nor do I see any point or potential humor in doing so.
Yeah, but Nigel had a point in that thread. Ranting is a dead art, here.
Yeah. I've run out of things to be mad about. I like to think that's a good thing, but time will tell.
Quote from: Exit City Hustle on September 13, 2010, 09:33:10 PM
Yeah. I've run out of things to be mad about. I like to think that's a good thing, but time will tell.
I'm still mad as hell, but nobody else seems to be. Or at least very few people.
...I have holes in my guts, otherwise I'd be ranting away. When gut-leakage is no longer an issue for me, I'll have some anger issues to manage.
ETA: no, Jenne's not on drugs atall atall--damn, look at the sentence formation up there. Meh. :horrormirth:
Are Doktor Howl and Miss Freaky together? Married? They seem like the discordian John Lennon and Yoko Ono of the internet.
Quote from: Judge Nasty on September 14, 2010, 12:29:25 AM
Are Doktor Howl and Miss Freaky together? Married? They seem like the discordian John Lennon and Yoko Ono of the internet.
I think it's more like Dok Howl is Freeky's mutated teddy bear.
I know it's the crack here, the crack and the booze. The people of Crow Town don't rape their daughters just because they are bad people, or because they are filled with despair and hatred from having their jobs taken away and their options slowly shut off. They don't go and get in fights because of these things and shoot one another, no it's only the crack, if we could just clean that up, just get the bars shut down and replaced with churches all the problems would go away, the factories would open back up and people would start being decent to each other again and the stores downtown would open back up again instead of staying as slowly decaying buildings that aren't seven safe to walk around in. I bet the KKK would leave too, if we could just get the crack and the booze and the weed and the pills out. Those people aren't really bad people, they just used some chemicals they shouldn't have used and they put badwrong thoughts in their heads. Maybe I should organize a march, a march against drugs and alcohol, to get the people to see where the real problem is.
Disclaimer: I thought this was gonna be a three-paragraph mini-rant with a pretty straightforward point. It ended up being a long stream of projectile word vomit, but after spending like 45 minutes on it I'm posting it regardless of quality (or lack thereof, really). You have been warned.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 09:34:10 PM
Quote from: Exit City Hustle on September 13, 2010, 09:33:10 PM
Yeah. I've run out of things to be mad about. I like to think that's a good thing, but time will tell.
I'm still mad as hell, but nobody else seems to be. Or at least very few people.
I'm pretty stinking mad, Dok, but I guess I'm just the quiet sort of mad. At least for the past while.
I went through my angry, ranting, latter teenage years here, furiously typing about what I was seeing as I opened my eyes to the world for the first time. Then... I don't know what. I stopped taking my pills, I trudged through the end of adolescence and into my 20s on willpower and the emotional support of my friends, here and in real life. But the world didn't go away just because I had turned my eyes away from it and towards my much smaller personal world; I just sort of... put it on the back burner of my mind.
There it's stayed for the past several months to a year, on the back burner, not forgotten but largely ignored. There was so much
other stuff to focus on, and some of it was way more pleasant than what I was seeing in the real world.
It is the drugs, Dok. My drug, it puts it all into sharp focus. Sometimes I think maybe I don't have a disorder so much as I have a natural defense against seeing too much. There is a reason the Blur Tool is so widely used in touching up photographs: it's nice to see a person's face without seeing the little red constellations on their chin or whatever. Sadly, though, circumstances in my small personal world have pushed me towards my pill again, and taken away the nice soft blur.
Now I can see it again, Dok.
The Grime.
I know you know what I mean. The thin film of invisible spunk that seems to cover nearly everything: people, places, institutions, ideas, everything. A nasty-smelling oil slick that makes everything seem disgusting and
wrong, even though you can't quite pin down why sometimes. Other times, it's obvious.
There's nothing truly wrong with all of those people out there that I pass by every day. They've just been touched by the Grime, and it gets everywhere. They just want to get through the day with as little misery as possible, like all of us. I look down, and
oh god it's on me too and I realize I can't get away from the Grime.
The school is covered in Grime. The politician in charge of it is practically a Lord of Grime, a seedy little goblin of a man whose main goal is to expend what little budget the school can manage on turning a public university into a glorified, profitable research facility. The undergraduates are nothing more than a whiny source of revenue for what's Really Important, and, what the hell, they're all just kids from less-wealthy families who thought they had a shot at sending their child to a nationally renowned college without having to relocate the rest of the family to a place with cheaper rent in order to make tuition. Darned city kids.
The new "education bill" for the State University of New York, PHEEIA, is a piece of impending legislature that purports to 'streamline outdated practices in the name of continuing to provide top-quality education', which, once you've washed the Grime from your tongue, is pronounced 'put the ability to hike up tuition in the hands of the university, rather than the state, and crank that sucker for all it's worth.'
They're all in on it, too. The universities, I mean. If tuition starts cranking up, do you think the current students are gonna vote with their feet and take their money elsewhere? Fuck no, not when transferring schools means finding another school with your major, or something close to it, that you can afford, and then losing about a fourth to a third of all your credits towards graduation because your new school decides that the work you did doesn't count. Better to suck it up and plow through that Bachelor's degree as fast as you can so that you can begin the long and rewarding process of paying off your student loans for the next fifteen years.
So money gets tighter and bright young eyes get duller and the Grime just builds up and up. Slog through it day by day, and put on the goddamn Blur filter if you don't want to lose your mind from just how scuzzy the whole thing is.
But I can't blur it out, Dok. Either I skip the pills and let everything pass me by in a haze, or I take them and see the Grime in all its hideous glory.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 09:12:50 PM
Yeah, but Nigel had a point in that thread. Ranting is a dead art, here.
I haven't ranted in a while. For a long time now I've been on this "calmly accept the failings of human existence" kick.
Quote from: Sigmatic on September 14, 2010, 04:20:57 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 09:12:50 PM
Yeah, but Nigel had a point in that thread. Ranting is a dead art, here.
I haven't ranted in a while. For a long time now I've been on this "calmly accept the failings of human existence" kick.
IF you don't kick the dog once in a while, It will keep shitting on your carpet
Quote from: Judge Nasty on September 14, 2010, 12:29:25 AM
Are Doktor Howl and Miss Freaky together? Married? They seem like the discordian John Lennon and Yoko Ono of the internet.
It's complicated.
In any case, you should probably apologize to her now, for comparing her to Yoko Ono. It would be the polite thing to do.
Incidentally, I was only joking. It isn't the drugs, it's Tucson. And we're all doomed here. :lulz:
Dok,
No way out.
Quote from: Richter on September 14, 2010, 04:22:14 AM
Quote from: Sigmatic on September 14, 2010, 04:20:57 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 09:12:50 PM
Yeah, but Nigel had a point in that thread. Ranting is a dead art, here.
I haven't ranted in a while. For a long time now I've been on this "calmly accept the failings of human existence" kick.
IF you don't kick the dog once in a while, It will keep shitting on your carpet
I am considering on making a major change in behavior to this effect.
...loading, please wait...
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 04:40:30 AM
Quote from: Judge Nasty on September 14, 2010, 12:29:25 AM
Are Doktor Howl and Miss Freaky together? Married? They seem like the discordian John Lennon and Yoko Ono of the internet.
It's complicated.
In any case, you should probably apologize to her now, for comparing her to Yoko Ono. It would be the polite thing to do.
Bump, just so there's no chance of a misunderstanding.
Dok,
Doesn't mind being called a filthy hippie by someone who doesn't know any better, but would prefer that Freeky not be compared to some fucking
artiste.
Well, looks like Judge Nasty has no interest in replying (to this, or a PM), even though he's been on the whole time, which implies that either:
1. He was being deliberately insulting, or
2. He's a fucking pussy.
Either way, I guess I have someone new to fight with. :lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 05:01:58 AM
Well, looks like Judge Nasty has no interest in replying (to this, or a PM), even though he's been on the whole time, which implies that either:
1. He was being deliberately insulting, or
2. He's a fucking pussy.
Either way, I guess I have someone new to fight with. :lulz:
I wouldn't like to be compared to Yoko Ono either. Not even to say how much prettier and more talented I am. :sad:
Quote from: phoenixofdiscordia on September 14, 2010, 05:31:14 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 05:01:58 AM
Well, looks like Judge Nasty has no interest in replying (to this, or a PM), even though he's been on the whole time, which implies that either:
1. He was being deliberately insulting, or
2. He's a fucking pussy.
Either way, I guess I have someone new to fight with. :lulz:
I wouldn't like to be compared to Yoko Ono either. Not even to say how much prettier and more talented I am. :sad:
Doesn't matter. Judge Nasty has already attacked just about everyone else he's spoken to. He's another Wade...Nothing to see here.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 05:32:24 AM
Quote from: phoenixofdiscordia on September 14, 2010, 05:31:14 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 05:01:58 AM
Well, looks like Judge Nasty has no interest in replying (to this, or a PM), even though he's been on the whole time, which implies that either:
1. He was being deliberately insulting, or
2. He's a fucking pussy.
Either way, I guess I have someone new to fight with. :lulz:
I wouldn't like to be compared to Yoko Ono either. Not even to say how much prettier and more talented I am. :sad:
Doesn't matter. Judge Nasty has already attacked just about everyone else he's spoken to. He's another Wade...Nothing to see here.
Meh. He hasn't spoken to me, and I've only seen that post and the one he just posted in Open Bar, so I can't say I really know. Still, I completely understand how that can be taken as an insult. I mean, going with the same theme, he could have compared you to the George Harrison and Ringo Starr of the Discordian internet, or whatever it was he said. Equally valid, and much less offensive.
Quote from: phoenixofdiscordia on September 14, 2010, 05:36:09 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 05:32:24 AM
Quote from: phoenixofdiscordia on September 14, 2010, 05:31:14 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 05:01:58 AM
Well, looks like Judge Nasty has no interest in replying (to this, or a PM), even though he's been on the whole time, which implies that either:
1. He was being deliberately insulting, or
2. He's a fucking pussy.
Either way, I guess I have someone new to fight with. :lulz:
I wouldn't like to be compared to Yoko Ono either. Not even to say how much prettier and more talented I am. :sad:
Doesn't matter. Judge Nasty has already attacked just about everyone else he's spoken to. He's another Wade...Nothing to see here.
Meh. He hasn't spoken to me, and I've only seen that post and the one he just posted in Open Bar, so I can't say I really know. Still, I completely understand how that can be taken as an insult. I mean, going with the same theme, he could have compared you to the George Harrison and Ringo Starr of the Discordian internet, or whatever it was he said. Equally valid, and much less offensive.
Between Open Bar and PMs, he's definitely a DK/Wade sort, probably back for revenge after we shat all over him whenever he was here the first time.
He's posting way too comprehensively to be Wade.
Quote from: Doktor Princess on September 14, 2010, 05:40:07 AM
He's posting way too comprehensively to be Wade.
I'm thinking #6, or the long-awaited return of Dr Cowass.
Quote from: Judge Nasty on September 14, 2010, 12:29:25 AM
Are Doktor Howl and Miss Freaky together? Married? They seem like the discordian John Lennon and Yoko Ono of the internet.
Assume nothing.
Wow, I really need to start saving my longer posts as text files on my computer for later analysis. Phlegmy cold, Tylenol AM, Adderall, and lack of sufficient sleep do not a clear narrative make. :oops:
I've always wanted to write more rants, but I seem to be busy with life.
Maybe I'll write a rant about being to busy to rant, if I can ever get around to it.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 04:54:09 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 14, 2010, 04:40:30 AM
Quote from: Judge Nasty on September 14, 2010, 12:29:25 AM
Are Doktor Howl and Miss Freaky together? Married? They seem like the discordian John Lennon and Yoko Ono of the internet.
It's complicated.
In any case, you should probably apologize to her now, for comparing her to Yoko Ono. It would be the polite thing to do.
Bump, just so there's no chance of a misunderstanding.
Dok,
Doesn't mind being called a filthy hippie by someone who doesn't know any better, but would prefer that Freeky not be compared to some fucking artiste.
Yeah, that.
It was one of those days where the light seems to come from every direction at once. That bright grey that hurts your eyes. And the mercury lay just below skin temp, with the softest kiss of wind over flesh.
A day, then, to be painfully aware.
I don't know if I was coming down, or climbing up again, and it didn't matter. All roads lead to Tucson anyway. And my traitorous body was likely travelling at least three of them at the same time. All I know is: all that whiskey last night solved nothing, the pills I had this morning have't kicked in yet, and I am in no mans land.
His house is ramshackle affair, and cosmetically it's as pleasing as a sand paper enema. It's all wrong and harsh and unloved. And even it's structure appears to be almost accidentally erect - like no one part can agree to fall first and so they all fall at once and support each other in their greed and weakness. All roads lead here too.
And so I sit in his kitchen as he fixes me a coffee in a cracked mug that says "orlds est ad", the snick snick snick sounds of his slippers on unwashed sticky bar room linoleum the counterpoint to the gurgling pipes and ever-dripping taps.
From somewhere deep in his throat he clears phlegm (it probably voted for Kennedy, back in the day - it sounds dusty and entrenched enough). And as he begins to tell me his Life Story, the Med Train finaly arrives at terminus-Tucson... I fall asleep once more.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 13, 2010, 07:20:17 PM
It's always the drugs, Jim.
You walk down the street, and you're surrounded by people doing crazy things. Spouses arguing with each other, making their opposite number hate them for no reason other than to win. Some dumbass shooting another dumbass because he felt he was disrespected (because prison guards respect you, dumbshit), some ignorant fuck having a "Tucson moment" because he thought his Hummer2 made him invincible in traffic. You know what I mean.
But the world can't be that crazy, Jim, it's just not possible, is it? No, it has to be the pills. It has to be the drugs making you think that Tucson creeps into every facet of daily life, making things horrible and weird, and usually in a bad way. It has to be the pharmaceuticals that made that off-duty police detective cry into his whiskey the other day, out of sheer frustration.
He hadn't even started drinking yet, and there he was, crying and repeating "It isn't supposed to be this way. We had a lid on things, and they laid all the uniforms off and the desk sergeant is selling go-pills to the ones that are left, because they work 12 hours instead of 8 now, and the bodies are starting to pile up again, just like the bad old days."
What the hell do you say to that, Jim?
You don't, of course. That's just the whiskey talking, even though he was still contemplating his first drink of the night.
It's just the drugs that make you think that Tucson is seedy and horrible and filthy, and if you cut back a bit, maybe things wouldn't look so fucking run down, and maybe you'd stop noticing the people waiting.
They wait, Jim, or it seems they do, for hours or days or years or their whole lives. That overweight kid waiting in front of the video store he works at (You can tell by his shirt)? The store closed 3 hours ago, and he's still waiting with his sad little backpack on his lap. He looks like he expects to wait a lot longer.
Everyone here seems to be waiting for whatever it is they're waiting for, and you want to grab them and shake them and say "YOUR LIFE IS PASSING YOU BY! DO SOMETHING WHILE YOU WAIT!"...But they won't. They'll just wait, because that's how the Spider has them programmed.
And if you weren't so fucked up on drugs, you wouldn't notice or care. It's someone else's problem, after all, and you have a busy day.
It's always the drugs, Jim.
Okay for now,
Dok
You know, I would love for it to be something as simple as drugs Dok. Something they could get a cure for or rehab or something. Otherwise Dok, it means they've just lost their minds. Dear lord Dok, can they really be that blind? That stupid?
And even as I type that, I think about what was on the news this morning and I know that yes, then can indeed be that blind, stupid and even more ignorant than the monkeys they came from. They are burning the city down a block at a time. They manage to kill someone EVERY. FUCKING. DAY! Somebody in this city gets shot and killed every day. Do they not feel their lives slipping away as they just stand there with the blank look on their face and the smoking gun in their hands. Do you think they get home and notice the overpowering smell of the gasoline they used to torch that house down the street? Or do you think they just sit there sniffing their fingers and laughing with no one to hear them, and no one to care?
And these people seem to hate each other for no reason other than the other one exists. But no one cares enough to do anything about it, and in honesty, I don't know that anything could be done anyway. What options? Mood control drugs in the water. Fuck that, just knock them all out and let them sleep the rest of their lives away. We can turn the shopping malls into medical control buildings and hang everybody like they did in Coma. Let them sleep until they die because it's not like they are doing anything worthwhile anyway right?
And I have to wonder if maybe it isn't easier Dok, to just take that other little white pill, you know the one, and float through the days believing in a change that will never happen and a better world that will never come to be. Thinking that we can trust our government to do what is best for the people, not for themselves.
Pass the bottle....
Complacency is a drug too, if I haven't said it enough already. You get addicted to it when everything is quiet and OK. Then when things get weird, you don't want to give up the quiet, the normal, the regular, so you cling to it. You dose yourself with "Everythign is FINE.", because it's all suppsoed to be happening right?
Just turn your head, act like the weird isn't there, and it will go away right?
Only an isolated incident.
That trenchcoat flasher on the corner? You're only encouraging him if you blush, scream, or turn your head and hustle away. Express approval if it's approval worthy, or express your distaste with a swift foot of editorial to the genitals. This is problem solving.
As I lay sleeping on my back I realized that something comfortable was under me, gently stroking me. My sleep was getting deeper and deeper. I felt something cool wrap around me, and just a tiny sting, not enough to even notice, really.
Slowly, steadily, one after another of these tentacles gently wrapped around me, searing themselves ever so tenderly to my flesh. I seemed to mind each one a little less than the previous one. It had been a long time since I was this calm, this comfortable.
Then I tried to move an arm and was unable to. I wasn't terribly bothered by this, although it seemed like I should be. Then I tried to move my legs, and again I was unable to. I started to get a bit scared, but then I could feel all the tentacles gently, lovingly squeezing me in perfect harmony. They were telling me it was alright, this is the way it's supposed to be. Seducing me by reminding me of how comfortable and calm I was.
I could feel something being pumped into my body with every squeeze, but what awoke me was I knew that something else was being sucked out. I screamed and tried to fight my way free. Those gentle tentacles were suddenly steel cables, unbreakable and inescapable.
I was trapped, I had allowed this to happen. It had happened in a moment of weakness when I was tired and beat down from seeing the horror every day. I began fighting harder, the once gentle restraints were now tearing my flesh, white hot bands that would never release me.
Suddenly I saw a tentacle for what it was. It was something in me, craving to unknow, desperately seeking to unsee it all. As I realized this the band of steel collapsed. Then one after another snapped as I realized I was the one who had put them there.
I was free.
Quote from: Richter on September 14, 2010, 03:51:15 PM
Complacency is a drug too, if I haven't said it enough already. You get addicted to it when everything is quiet and OK. Then when things get weird, you don't want to give up the quiet, the normal, the regular, so you cling to it. You dose yourself with "Everythign is FINE.", because it's all suppsoed to be happening right?
Just turn your head, act like the weird isn't there, and it will go away right?
Only an isolated incident.
That trenchcoat flasher on the corner? You're only encouraging him if you blush, scream, or turn your head and hustle away. Express approval if it's approval worthy, or express your distaste with a swift foot of editorial to the genitals. This is problem solving.
I agree people want things to be ok. They want their lives to run on that even keel and have smooth sailing.
I'm not trying to solve the problem, I don't think there is a true solution and even if there is, the damn monkeys aren't going to cooperate anyway.
I'm the worst at if you ignore it then it will go away mentality. I can't let myself get involved. I can't save these people. I cannot continue to wipe the blood off my hands and just go on like nothing happened. Slapping bandaids on mortal wounds. So I ignore it. No it doesn't go away, but it isn't in my face anymore either.
Does that make me a terrible person? Someone who no longer gives a flying fuck about the general population? I've gotten to the point I don't care if it does or doesn't as long as I'm not a part of either the problem or having to come up with a solution.
Quote from: Kiaransalee on September 14, 2010, 04:02:01 PM
Quote from: Richter on September 14, 2010, 03:51:15 PM
Complacency is a drug too, if I haven't said it enough already. You get addicted to it when everything is quiet and OK. Then when things get weird, you don't want to give up the quiet, the normal, the regular, so you cling to it. You dose yourself with "Everythign is FINE.", because it's all suppsoed to be happening right?
Just turn your head, act like the weird isn't there, and it will go away right?
Only an isolated incident.
That trenchcoat flasher on the corner? You're only encouraging him if you blush, scream, or turn your head and hustle away. Express approval if it's approval worthy, or express your distaste with a swift foot of editorial to the genitals. This is problem solving.
I agree people want things to be ok. They want their lives to run on that even keel and have smooth sailing.
I'm not trying to solve the problem, I don't think there is a true solution and even if there is, the damn monkeys aren't going to cooperate anyway.
I'm the worst at if you ignore it then it will go away mentality. I can't let myself get involved. I can't save these people. I cannot continue to wipe the blood off my hands and just go on like nothing happened. Slapping bandaids on mortal wounds. So I ignore it. No it doesn't go away, but it isn't in my face anymore either.
Does that make me a terrible person? Someone who no longer gives a flying fuck about the general population? I've gotten to the point I don't care if it does or doesn't as long as I'm not a part of either the problem or having to come up with a solution.
No, to a point it makes you a reasonable person. None of us are expected or requested to jump everywhere, solving everything we come across. There's a line in action, what kind of action, and inaction.
You make a good point. Excessive use of "I have to solve this", or too often caving into "If not ME then who?" reasoning will get you invovled in a lot of shit that is not your problem, and donating to every sappy ass charity in existence. We need to dsicern where and how we do what we do, sicne there are whole industries grown around trying to make us help.
No set rules when and what falls where, no one said this was going to be easy.
Dok, sometimes you frighten me. And I am fearless.
Hawk,
exorcising voice mail.
Quote from: Charley Brown on September 14, 2010, 09:21:30 PM
Dok, sometimes you frighten me. And I am fearless.
Hawk,
exorcising voice mail.
Get an extra priest.
ALL YOUR VOICEMAILS ARE BELONG TO ME.
this fread is :mittens:
It's been 7 months since I had my reality filters changed for me. Weed for Risperidone. i wandered around in a green haze for years, rather than fight my way out, and now I sleep all day and play games. Im drowning in the drugs and the aftermath.
I cant see a way up and out over it all. I miss the drug that fucked me up still. So, what will i do tomorrrow to change it? Probably fuck all. All the urge to do Something Else got ripped out of me and replaced with Some Kind Of Crazy. All the avenues towards change seem to be long and filled with beuarocratic obstacles and poor mental health services. i need to stop procrastinating. in fact i have done for 13 years now.
Maybe tomorrow I will start to pull my shit together.
Quote from: Rainy Day Pixie on September 14, 2010, 11:17:50 PM
this fread is :mittens:
It's been 7 months since I had my reality filters changed for me. Weed for Risperidone. i wandered around in a green haze for years, rather than fight my way out, and now I sleep all day and play games. Im drowning in the drugs and the aftermath.
I cant see a way up and out over it all. I miss the drug that fucked me up still. So, what will i do tomorrrow to change it? Probably fuck all. All the urge to do Something Else got ripped out of me and replaced with Some Kind Of Crazy. All the avenues towards change seem to be long and filled with beuarocratic obstacles and poor mental health services. i need to stop procrastinating. in fact i have done for 13 years now.
Maybe tomorrow I will start to pull my shit together.
Tomorrow kills.
I spent about an hour last night, trying to come up with something. And failed, so I closed the tab and went back to my life in this little slice of Everything Is Fine - because that's a place, too. Hell, that's my half of the city (this city isn't a City, by the way. It wants to be, though, the silly thing). It's tense here, and anything that is different than or denies that Everything Is Fine (the Obama sign in the neighbor's yard, the "No on 8" sticker on their car) is loathed immensely. You can feel it, too, when you walk passed that house. It's thick and heavy in the air, and you sometimes hear the other neighbors make snide remarks about it while they watch football in their garage and drinking bad beer with the door open.
On another note, this kick-started a project long on the backburner, given that I spent most of that hour last night trying to come up with a way to explain the place I live in. Photo-essay ahoy!