Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Discordian Recipes => Topic started by: Jasper on October 29, 2010, 09:20:36 PM

Title: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Jasper on October 29, 2010, 09:20:36 PM
You can help by posting recipes for pizza dough that don't give you crust with the consistency of saltines.

Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Triple Zero on October 29, 2010, 09:29:19 PM
Use flour with more gluten in it. Also, you need to kneed it for AGES. That way the glutens unfold and become stringy elastic protein strings, making your dough more elastic.

According to Alton Brown, it's not done until you can take a little ball from it and squeeze it into a mini-pizza, the bottom of which is so thin you can see light through it. Like chewing gum.

If you can't find flour with more gluten, one way that I haven't tried out myself, but should theoretically work, is a thing I did from a "kids physics experiments in kitchen" kind of science for kids book, when I was young. The experiment was that you'd make a ball of dough from water and flour, and kneed it and continue kneeding under a thin stream of running tap water. The idea being, starch dissolves in water, gluten does not. I ended up with a sticky sort of chewing gum like substance. That's gluten. So I'd figure, if you mix that back in with regular dough, you get extra gluten content. Note: I never tried this. If it's too much gluten (I have no idea) the pizza could turn rock hard, I think :)

Finally, use yeast. Even if you don't care if it rises very much, activated yeast gives a really nice "bread" flavour to dough, that you definitely want in pizza. No baking powder.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Jasper on October 29, 2010, 09:48:24 PM
Yes, I think the AP crap flour I've been resorting to is not up to the task.  However, I'll try kneading it as long as I can stand next time.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on October 29, 2010, 09:51:10 PM
1 1/2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1 1/2 cups unbleached bread flour, plus more for dusting
1/8 cup cornmeal for the pizza stone or tile
3/4 teaspoon active dry yeast
2 1/4 teaspoons kosher salt
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1 1/2 cups cold water

1. The day before cooking, prepare the dough. whisk together the flours, yeast and salt in the bowl of an electric mixer. Switch to a spoon and stir in 1 1/2 cups cold water and olive oil until a rough dough forms. Set the bowl on the mixer and, using the paddle attachment, mix on low speed for 1 minute. Increase the speed to high and beat for 4 to 6 minutes, until it becomes a wet and vaguely menacing mass. (If it forms into a ball, lower the mixer speed to medium-high. If not, stop the mixer to scrape down the sides once.). You can do this in your food processor as well.

2. Scrape and pour the dough onto a heavily floured work surface. Flour the dough and shape into a rough ball. Let rest for 10 minutes.

3. Cut the dough into 2 equal pieces. Shape each piece into a smooth ball. Place each ball in a well-oiled bowl, dust with flour and loosely cover with plastic wrap. Let the dough rise until it is at least doubled in size, about 3 hours.

4. Punch the dough balls down, shape into rounds and wrap in cling film. Refrigerate dough between 1 and 24 hours.

Makes 2 balls.

When you use the dough, make sure your stone or tile is generously covered with the cornmeal.  I will at this time add garlic and or herbs to the cornmeal for flavor!!
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Jasper on October 29, 2010, 09:54:03 PM
Thanks!  Goanna try to get my kitchenaid back so I can try that.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: East Coast Hustle on October 29, 2010, 09:55:19 PM
you should be able to find high-gluten flour in any decent supermarket.

water, high-gluten flour, yeast, salt. That should be all you need. And be sure to proof the dough once it's been mixed to your liking.

once it's proofed and you're ready to turn it into a delicious disc that will hold cheesy goodness, it's important to not over-work it. Don't roll it all the way out to size, roll it until it's just flattened enough and just circular enough that you can toss it or hand-stretch it the rest of the way. Before you sauce it and cheese it, you'll want to dock it (that's what those spiky rollers all pizzerias have are for). If you don't have a docker, take a bamboo skewer or a clean awl and just lightly tap into it all over, leaving an area about a half inch to an inch from the edge undocked. Docking keeps it from puffing up in the middle and causing huge bubbles, leaving that space around the edge allows the crust to rise and become, well, a proper crust.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Jasper on October 29, 2010, 09:59:39 PM
I've been adding olive oil to my dough, I confess.  It wasn't my idea to begin with, but I've never had sticking problems at least.

Thanks for the tips, ECH!  Taking notes.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 29, 2010, 11:11:52 PM
A gluten-forming shortcut if you're working with all-purpose flour is to punch and slam your dough. Works out stress, too.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Jasper on October 29, 2010, 11:20:58 PM
I'll take a whack at it tonight.  Too much good advice to wait any longer than that.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Rumckle on October 30, 2010, 02:55:48 AM
Khara seems on the money with this, but I've heard that leaving it for 2-3 days in the fridge gives it the best taste. Of course that means being prepared in advance, which I usually am not.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: East Coast Hustle on October 30, 2010, 04:39:28 AM
2-3 days is probably OK but you want to be careful not to let it over-proof or it will turn out thin and neither crispy nor chewy, when a proper pizza crust should be both.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Jasper on October 30, 2010, 04:53:36 AM
I just found out I had a dough from long ago in the freezer.

...Can dough form glutens while frozen?  


ETA:  Nevermind.  I shouldn't have to ask, but I was tired and not thinking very much.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Triple Zero on October 30, 2010, 01:49:38 PM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 29, 2010, 11:11:52 PM
A gluten-forming shortcut if you're working with all-purpose flour is to punch and slam your dough. Works out stress, too.

I could be mistaken, or just pedantic, but afaik that doesn't "form" gluten, in the sense that you get more gluten out of it. It just makes the gluten that's in there do its elastic thing more.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on October 30, 2010, 03:41:25 PM
I found the recipe on the web forever ago and honestly used it the first time because I had all of the ingredients.  I have made it and used it right away but the longest I've ever left it in the fridge was about 48 hours. I made it on a Friday night and we used it Sunday.  I've found it is better after at least 4 hours in the fridge but I wouldn't use it myself after more than the 48 hours.  I tried freezing it a couple of times personally I thought it lost a lot in the freezer and it makes it chewy.  Worked well for fried bread after freezing though.  Drizzled with olive oil, sprinkle with salt and toasted garlic and yum!
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: AFK on November 05, 2010, 03:29:16 PM
I'm lazy so I just buy the Beer Dough made by Portland Pie Company.

Yummo!
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: East Coast Hustle on November 06, 2010, 01:04:33 AM
Fuck those guys. I was informed by very reliable sources that they stole several recipes from me when I had my pizzeria.

They do make a good crust though.
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: AFK on November 07, 2010, 10:59:59 AM
In that case, their piracy is very yummy. 
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Precious Moments Zalgo on November 09, 2010, 02:40:12 AM
This is the pizza dough I made today, taking some ideas from this thread.  It took me 7 days to make this dough, but I was very happy with how the pizza turned out.

I started with a gallon Ziplock bag containing a small amount of frozen sourdough starter.

7 days prior:
Thaw sourdough starter.
Add 1 tbsp sugar, 1 tbsp unbleached all-purpose flour, 1 tbsp milk.
Mush by hand.
Place 1 large sprig fresh rosemary and 2 peeled cloves of garlic in a small tupperware container, and cover with 1/4 cup olive oil.  Place cover on container.  Keep someplace cool and dark.

6 days prior:
Burp bag as necessary, mush by hand.
   
5 days prior:
Burp bag as necessary, mush by hand.

4 days prior:
Add 1 tbsp sugar, 1 cup unbleached all-purpose flour, 1 cup lukewarm water.
Burp bag as necessary, mush by hand.
   
3 days prior:
Burp bag as necessary, mush by hand.
   
2 days prior:
Add 1 tbsp sugar, 1 tbsp unbleached all-purpose flour, 1 tbsp milk.
Burp bag as necessary, mush by hand.

1 day prior:
Put 1 1/2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour in a non-metallic mixing bowl.
Add 1/2 cup whole wheat flour to mixing bowl.
Scoop out 1 cup sourdough starter from bag.  Freeze the remainder.
Add 8 oz beer.   Drink remaining 4 oz.  I used Magic Hat #9, but anything light and not strongly hopped will do.
Stir until well mixed.  Cover with a towel and keep someplace warm.

2 hours prior:
Strain olive oil from the first day into the mixture.
Add 2 tsp sea salt.
Mix well with wooden spoon.
Mix in 1/2 cup whole wheat flour.
Mix in 1 1/2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour, 1/2 cup at a time, or until it is impossible to stir with your spoon.
Turn out onto floured surface and knead for 10 minutes.
Divide dough into two equal portions.  Use knife, don't tear or mash.
Shape into smooth balls and place in well oiled non-metallic mixing bowl.
Cover with towel and keep someplace warm.

Time to make the pizza:
Punch the dough balls down.
For each ball,
   Roll into a small disks.
   Stretch or toss by hand.
   Dust pizza stone with cornmeal, and place crust upon it.
   With a fork, lightly tap the crust all over except for the outermost 1/2 inch.
   Brush crust with olive oil.
   Add sauce and toppings.
   Bake in 425F oven for 15-20 minutes, or until crust is golden brown.
   Let stand 5 minutes, then slice and serve
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Whatever on November 09, 2010, 07:25:05 PM
Where did you find the frozen sourdough starter?  Does it taste the same after being frozen?  I can't help but think it would lose something by freezing it, but I honestly don't know enough about starters to say.

Otherwise I love sourdough and that recipe, while a bit time consuming, can only be delicious in the end.  I imagine you could make a lot more than pizza with that dough huh?
Title: Re: My pizza dough sucks wieners for fiddle faddle.
Post by: Precious Moments Zalgo on November 09, 2010, 08:00:19 PM
Quote from: Niamh on November 09, 2010, 07:25:05 PM
Where did you find the frozen sourdough starter?  Does it taste the same after being frozen?  I can't help but think it would lose something by freezing it, but I honestly don't know enough about starters to say.

Otherwise I love sourdough and that recipe, while a bit time consuming, can only be delicious in the end.  I imagine you could make a lot more than pizza with that dough huh?
Someone gave it to my wife along with a recipe for Amish Friendship Bread.  After you finish making this recipe, you end up with four starters.  You keep one for yourself, and give the other three plus copies of the instructions to three friends.  So, this starter propagates much like a chain letter.

Freezing doesn't hurt it.  It's basically just yeast, lactobacillus (lactic acid bacteria), and some other microbes in a medium of flour and milk or water.  Freezing just makes them go dormant.  After it thaws out, I feed it with the tbsp each of milk, flour, and sugar, and that gets them eating and reproducing again.

I made the Amish Friendship Bread recipe, and I have made regular sourdough bread with this starter.  This was the first time I made pizza dough with it.

It took a long time, but almost all of it was spent waiting.  Those little guys can be a bit sluggish when they first thaw out.  The only reason I freeze it is because I tend to go weeks without using it.  If I were making a lot of sourdough, I would keep the starter at room temperature and replenish the flour and water as I use it, and then I could make sourdough every 1-2 days.