http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Xc5wIpUenQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Xc5wIpUenQ)
TurBacon Epic:
1 Quail
1 Cornish game hen
1 Chicken
1 Duck
1 Turkey
1 Pig
1. Place each of these animals inside each other, like a carnivorous Russian nesting doll (top to bottom). Use copious amounts of meat glue, butter, and bacon (if you don't use more than 10 packs, you're doing it wrong).
2. Roast.
3. Eat
4. Die
"Just because we're fucked up, we garnished it with Baconators." :lulz:
I assume this summons Tslanese if done correctly?
As I once explained to my friend Z, some food experiments are exercises in gluttony, rather than actual food appreciation. Roasting all those animals inside each other only ensures that none of them are prepared optimally, and is essentially an expensive waste of deliciousness. Why not just fill a trough with white rice and butter? It's the same level of culinary sophistication.
Hell, why not? If we're going to be the richest, fattest, craziest motherfuckers on Earth, we might as well take it to the wall. We're in decline now, so all the more reason. Glut while you can. Nothing succeeds like excess.
That sounds very medieval. Don't forget to serve it on trenchers, and then when you're done eating, throw the trenchers and entrails out to the poor.
Quote from: Sigmatic on November 28, 2010, 07:37:55 PM
Hell, why not? If we're going to be the richest, fattest, craziest motherfuckers on Earth, we might as well take it to the wall. We're in decline now, so all the more reason. Glut while you can. Nothing succeeds like excess.
Oh, if the point is to be gluttonous, that's fine. It's just that people seem to hail such culinary monstrosities as gastronomic delicacies and not what they actually are, which is a sad waste of quality ingredients. What they basically did there is make sausage, completely annihilating the delicate flavors of the individual meats which would have been far better roasted alone, without stuffing, and served together on the table for everyone to take their choice.
I've tried things like this; I was at the Porktopia party. I love pork, and I love meat, and sadly, the experience of actually eating one of these is pretty similar to eating a slightly overdone $300 bratwurst. I'd say it's more performance art than actual cooking.
Delicacy? Oh lol. Yes, very refined, the oven chimera.
If you understand my world-renowned love of pork... it pains me to see it abused in such a way.
No, I get that. Still- I wouldn't mind trying it for myself sometime. It just looks fun to do.
All of those ingredients are awesome, cooked separately.
Quail and Cornish hens slow cooked in sauces.
Duck, chicken and turkey braised and roasted.
side of pig barbecued over a grill all day long.
Together, they all get cooked wrong for their individual needs.
Come on people. We're COQUIVORES. There is no excuse for cooking food wrong. All this shit is just an excuse to create a mediocre food monstrosity.
Now, what NIGEL said, about cooking these all individually, and creating a spread where you can pick and choose pieces of each to eat.....
OFUCK, I think I'm going to cry of awesome.
Sort of how a toccata's purpose is to show off the skill of the performer, there should be a similar kind of meal that stresses a prolific quantity and quality that demonstrates a chef's skill.
Power Dinner.
Quote from: Sigmatic on November 28, 2010, 08:47:54 PM
Sort of how a toccata's purpose is to show off the skill of the performer, there should be a similar kind of meal that stresses a prolific quantity and quality that demonstrates a chef's skill.
Power Dinner.
Or simply, Culinary Toccata.
This idea needs development. I've done dinners like this before, mainly as part of celebrations, but I've never made a thing of it.
The idea would be that the chef challenges themselves to do several favorite dishes as perfectly as possible. Would that be awesome?
Quote from: Sigmatic on November 28, 2010, 09:12:41 PM
This idea needs development. I've done dinners like this before, mainly as part of celebrations, but I've never made a thing of it.
The idea would be that the chef challenges themselves to do several favorite dishes as perfectly as possible. Would that be awesome?
Except I think thats what chefs do all the time.
Yeah, chefs do. But does anyone else? They oughtta.
Uh... Yes. That's the whole point.
Ok.
Quote from: ϗ on November 28, 2010, 09:37:54 PM
Quote from: Sigmatic on November 28, 2010, 09:12:41 PM
This idea needs development. I've done dinners like this before, mainly as part of celebrations, but I've never made a thing of it.
The idea would be that the chef challenges themselves to do several favorite dishes as perfectly as possible. Would that be awesome?
Except I think thats what chefs do all the time.
ha! maybe those asshole impostors on TV, but any real chef (IOW one who's trying to put 300+ dinners out in a 4 hour service window while simultaneously supervising the prep cooks, thinking of the next day's specials and what needs to be ordered, and abusing the front-of-house staff into doing their jobs semi-competently) is really just trying to not let the entire operation go down in flames. Absolute perfection all the time is a nice ideal, but it's a myth. Even cats like Joel Robuchon and Eric Ripert resort to
System D every night. In fact, I suspect that their elevated positions in the profession largely stem
from their proficiency in the art of the masterful shortcut, though I doubt they would ever publicly admit that. Neither would I, to anyone whose opinion of my restaurant I cared about.
Quote from: Nigel on November 28, 2010, 08:08:25 PM
people seem to hail such culinary monstrosities as gastronomic delicacies
I would laugh at those people.
And yet, I still cooked a "Bacon Explosion", which was delicious.
But part of the awesome was also because of this:
QuoteI'd say it's more performance art than actual cooking.
I'm pretty sure that the fun me and Bo had in preparing it far outweighed the enjoyment of the other people just eating it. I would never deny that, and in fact, without having prepared ("built") it myself, I am not so sure if it would have been worth it. Although it WAS delicious. Also it didn't involve much quality meat. Except quality bacon and quality ground pork.
Quote from: ϗ on November 28, 2010, 08:42:48 PM
Come on people. We're COQUIVORES.
:lmnuendo:
BWAAAHAHAHAAHA
sorry, nobody caught that? :lulz:
I did. :lol:
You're right-on, 000. When my husband and I did the turbaconducken, it was more of the challenge of doing the thing than the awesomeness of the taste--which was a side benefit. The whole thing sorta became more of a production than we liked in the end, but we had a helluva time doing it and don't regret it at all. Our guests enjoyed it as a rarity as well as a tasty way to enjoy the "usual" turkey.
Would we be doing it again? Probably not. Not any time soon. But I never saw it as a waste, either. Very opposite--especially as there was none leftover, that I can remember anyway.