Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Techmology and Scientism => Topic started by: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on November 30, 2010, 11:10:30 PM

Title: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on November 30, 2010, 11:10:30 PM
http://www.nasa.gov/home/hqnews/2010/nov/HQ_M10-167_Astrobiology.html

QuoteWASHINGTON -- NASA will hold a news conference at 2 p.m. EST on Thursday, Dec. 2, to discuss an astrobiology finding that will impact the search for evidence of extraterrestrial life. Astrobiology is the study of the origin, evolution, distribution and future of life in the universe.

The news conference will be held at the NASA Headquarters auditorium at 300 E St. SW, in Washington. It will be broadcast live on NASA Television and streamed on the agency's website at http://www.nasa.gov.


Now that's a teaser...
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 30, 2010, 11:13:46 PM
First Contact Day!
:tinfoilhat:
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Precious Moments Zalgo on November 30, 2010, 11:23:20 PM
Could be interesting.  I love The Register (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/11/30/nasa_aliens_revelations/)'s take on it, with the headline, "NASA to make MAJOR ALIENS REVELATION this week".

QuoteBut, until the embargo on the NASA story this week ends, we can't reveal what it is that the space boffins are going to announce. Now is surely the time for wild and colourful speculation, not dull scientific fact.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 30, 2010, 11:37:09 PM
Quote from: Pastor-Mullah Zappathruster on November 30, 2010, 11:23:20 PM
Could be interesting.  I love The Register (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/11/30/nasa_aliens_revelations/)'s take on it, with the headline, "NASA to make MAJOR ALIENS REVELATION this week".

QuoteBut, until the embargo on the NASA story this week ends, we can't reveal what it is that the space boffins are going to announce. Now is surely the time for wild and colourful speculation, not dull scientific fact.


:lulz:
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 30, 2010, 11:40:19 PM
Wild speculation 1-

Government is beating Wikileaks to it. US has in fact been in contact with alien civilizations for decades. That was Assange's insurance policy. He will now mysteriously commit suicide.

Wild speculation 2-

Jesus has returned to Earth, revealing that the Bible is literally true and it really is just us out here.



Ok people, lets keep it up!
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Precious Moments Zalgo on November 30, 2010, 11:41:23 PM
And the wild and colorful speculation by the news media has begun:

http://news.google.com/news/more?q=astrobiology+finding&hl=en&safe=off&prmd=ivn&resnum=1&um=1&ie=UTF-8&ncl=d82J2v4bJpRSmAMLgRFLGGlVTBfvM&ei=HIv1TMqFOsK88gbA-8HZBQ&sa=X&oi=news_result&ct=more-results&resnum=1&ved=0CCMQqgIwAA

Quote"So, if I had to guess at what NASA is going to reveal on Thursday, I'd say that they've discovered arsenic on Titan and maybe even detected chemical evidence of bacteria utilizing it for photosynthesis (by following the elements)," Kottke wrote.
more by Jason Kottke - 6 hours ago - Atlanta Journal Constitution
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Precious Moments Zalgo on November 30, 2010, 11:45:53 PM
Wild Speculation 3 - NASA has discovered an "Independence Day" style mothership speeding towards Earth.  It found us by following our SETI signals.

ETA: and these aliens have seen the movie, so they aren't going to fall for the trick where we sneak a nuke on board in one of their fighters.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 30, 2010, 11:50:23 PM
Quote from: Pastor-Mullah Zappathruster on November 30, 2010, 11:45:53 PM
Wild Speculation 3 - NASA has discovered an "Independence Day" style mothership speeding towards Earth.  It found us by following our SETI signals.

ETA: and these aliens have seen the movie, so they aren't going to fall for the trick where we sneak a nuke on board in one of their fighters.

They've also made sure that their computers aren't compatible with Mac laptop link ups
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on November 30, 2010, 11:54:06 PM
Wild speculation 4-

We successfully developed FTL/Spacefolding/discovered a wormhole during the Clinton administration. We've been using it ever since. We've discovered primitive humanoid life elsewhere and we;ve been abducting them and probing them.

We're the aliens bitches!
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Precious Moments Zalgo on December 01, 2010, 12:22:28 AM
Wild speculation 5 - NASA detected the souls of the Heaven's Gate cult riding around in the tail of the Hale Bopp comet.
Wild speculation 6 - A DC-9 full of Psychlos and piloted by Xenu is headed to Earth.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 01, 2010, 12:27:29 AM
Wild Speculation 7- The Elohim bringing Rael back from a weekend bender
Wild Speculation 8- Space battle going on between two different races round about Jupiter way
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Cain on December 01, 2010, 01:12:55 AM
Wild Speculation 9 - the NASA labs synthesize some seriously potent LSD
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on December 01, 2010, 01:17:46 AM
#10 - President Obama, trying to save face with the new GOP majority in the House, has replaced top NASA officials with Southern Baptist clergymen, and the search for extraterrestrial life has been called off, because it isn't in the Bible.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Don Coyote on December 01, 2010, 02:53:39 AM
11- NASA finally reveals that our world leaders have always been space reptiles.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Jasper on December 01, 2010, 02:57:02 AM
12 - They'll unzip their human skin and reveal that they're all velociraptors, and we'll all suddenly remember that we are too.  Yay!
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 01, 2010, 02:57:39 AM
13- Borg cube.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Suu on December 01, 2010, 03:11:53 AM
14> Nancy Pelosi is a reptilian shapeshifter.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 01, 2010, 03:25:53 AM
15- We're the aliens part 2: Turns out we're actually descended from stranded colonists, homeworld finally getting around to seeing what happened to us.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Eater of Clowns on December 01, 2010, 03:27:16 AM
16.  It's dildoes all the way down.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on December 01, 2010, 03:34:22 AM
17. They actually had the Hubble turned around backwards and we've all be staring at extreme close-ups of Oprah's ass this whole time.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 01, 2010, 03:39:30 AM
Quote from: postvex™ on December 01, 2010, 03:34:22 AM
17. They actually had the Hubble turned around backwards and we've all be staring at extreme close-ups of Oprah's ass this whole time.

:mittens:
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Jasper on December 01, 2010, 04:46:58 AM
Quote from: postvex™ on December 01, 2010, 03:34:22 AM
17. They actually had the Hubble turned around backwards and we've all be staring at extreme close-ups of Oprah's ass this whole time.

Or the magnification was inverted and we've been looking at tiny space microbes. 
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Triple Zero on December 01, 2010, 11:06:33 AM
Quote from: postvex™ on December 01, 2010, 01:17:46 AM
#10 - President Obama, trying to save face with the new GOP majority in the House, has replaced top NASA officials with Southern Baptist clergymen, and the search for extraterrestrial life has been called off, because it isn't in the Bible.

Dude, haven't you read Ezekiel? It's totally in the bible, man!
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 01, 2010, 11:12:31 AM
Quote from: Triple Zero on December 01, 2010, 11:06:33 AM
Quote from: postvex™ on December 01, 2010, 01:17:46 AM
#10 - President Obama, trying to save face with the new GOP majority in the House, has replaced top NASA officials with Southern Baptist clergymen, and the search for extraterrestrial life has been called off, because it isn't in the Bible.

Dude, haven't you read Ezekiel? It's totally in the bible, man!

:lulz:

Man, It sucked to be Ezekiel. Abducted by aliens, had to eat poop bread....
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Requia ☣ on December 02, 2010, 07:05:05 PM
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/compost/2010/12/the_big_announcement_nasa_find.html Bacteria with arsenic based DNA were discovered in California.
Title: Re: NASA Sets News Conference on Astrobiology Discovery
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 02, 2010, 07:40:54 PM
So I guess the next question is, what happened here? Are these a mutated strain of bacteria, a separate abiogenesis event, or space germs?  :lulz:

This is pretty cool though.
Title: New life found
Post by: Adios on December 02, 2010, 09:46:06 PM
http://www.cnn.com/2010/US/12/02/nasa.extraterrestrial.life/index.html?hpt=T1

Scientists have discovered a form of bacteria that can thrive on arsenic -- an element generally considered toxic -- dramatically expanding both traditional notions of how life is sustained and the range of where it might be found in the universe, NASA funded-researchers said Thursday.

"Life as we know it requires particular chemical elements and excludes others," Arizona State University researcher Ariel Anbar said in a news release. "But are those the only options? How different could life be?"
The bacterium not only grew but also incorporated the arsenic molecules into its DNA, in place of phosphorus, she said.

Very interesting.
Title: Re: New life found
Post by: Prince Glittersnatch III on December 03, 2010, 02:10:01 AM
Filthy hipster bacteria.

"Oh yeah I used to use phosphorus until it got mainstream. Now Im really into arsenic, youve probably never heard of it its pretty obscure."
Title: Re: New life found
Post by: Jasper on December 03, 2010, 02:11:51 AM
LIFE

dun dun dunt nuh nuhhh

LIFE IS LIFE

dun dun dunt nuh nuhhh
Title: Re: New life found
Post by: Phox on December 03, 2010, 02:14:57 AM
That... is... awesome! Take that intro to biology!  :lulz:
Title: Re: New life found
Post by: geekdad on December 03, 2010, 02:26:10 AM
QuoteNASA's Newly Discovered Arsenic-Loving Bacteria Are Fascinating, but Not Aliens [Updated + Video]

http://www.popsci.com/science/article/2010-12/nasa-announces-strange-bacterial-behavior-raising-questions-alien-life-hunters
Title: Re: New life found
Post by: the last yatto on December 03, 2010, 05:29:51 AM
Seems more like breeding a new subspecies not proving anything "new"
then again I'm not someone who said life requires these elements
Title: Re: New life found
Post by: President Television on December 03, 2010, 01:32:52 PM
This is pretty exciting.