Our good friend and fellow Discordian, Pentagram (aka Doktor Vitriol) has passed away.
Details of his death are conflicting, but the best we can guess is that he was killed while competing in one of those dangerous and illegal unlicensed bagpipe competitions. Having eaten "tatties and neeps" for breakfast, he farted at a crucial moment, forgot to "circular breathe", and got sucked up the pipe of his instrument.
This alone probably wouldn't have been fatal to a man known as the "Terror of the Drainpipes", but he was then apparently mistaken for a haggis by his fellow competitors, and devoured alive. Witnesses say it was better than usual haggis, if a little stringy, and louder than normal.
There is mourning in Scotland...All the locals are wearing black track suits, and shanking double the number of tourists in his honor.
And there is mourning here, too. Though international law prevented Pent from traveling, we here in Tucson always considered him one of our own. Our tweakers are less jittery than normal, and our perverts weep like little children.
Say what you like about him, Pent was a giant of a man who could heave a brick through a 3" Lexan window, and the world will be a little less strange without him. Where now will the prostitutes in Aberdeen get such high-quality STDs?
Where, indeed?
Or Kill Me.
His untimely demise brings weeping and wailing from every degenerate known to mankind.
Quote from: Charley Brown on December 20, 2010, 05:24:28 PM
His untimely demise brings weeping and wailing from every degenerate known to mankind.
Who will watch over the tape worm freaks now? :cry:
It's interesting that his passing is coinciding with the Lunar Eclipse. Maybe he was right after all. ;)
May he eat all the haggis he wants in P3ntheaven.
Quote from: Suu on December 20, 2010, 05:49:38 PM
May he eat all the haggis he wants in P3ntheaven.
Scotsmen don't go to heaven. They have a spot North of heaven, that heaven uses as a rubbish tip, so the Scotsmen will feel at home.
In honor of this passing, Miskatonic U, who granted the late Doktor's Associates in Horribleness, will be holding a memorial service at the old field stone field house, in between the tractors. Quesitonable canned juice and "Cookies" will be provided. No flowers (Insurace reasons), but donations in teh deceased's name may be converted into potatoes and stuffed into the Associate Dean's Tailpipe.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 20, 2010, 05:21:37 PM
Our good friend and fellow Discordian, Pentagram (aka Doktor Vitriol) has passed away.
Details of his death are conflicting, but the best we can guess is that he was killed while competing in one of those dangerous and illegal unlicensed bagpipe competitions. Having eaten "tatties and neeps" for breakfast, he farted at a crucial moment, forgot to "circular breathe", and got sucked up the pipe of his instrument.
CAN'T...FUCKING....BREATHE :lulz:
:cry:
He will be sorely missed.
Hi! I'm still alive, I just don't get on that much due to computer sharing/ time management issues (I usually refuse to go onto PD unless I KNOW I have nothing to do for the next number of hours).
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaanway.
P3nT was an asshole, and I'm fucking GLAD he's dead.
I just wish that fucker had paid his ten spot up before he kicked it.
I did not know the man Anne Frankly I'm not sure how i got here. but i don't mind the Scottish and their haggis eating, tourist shanking ways. I got close to Scotland on a holiday once... but luckily the signs caught my attention and directed me back southward towards the safer, quieter and all around less prone to coronary heart disease county of Kent where i have remained to this very day hoping it takes the Scots a while to get down here and stab me in the name of freedom.
Tonight I raise a glass of cheap larger, brewed with little consideration to health and safety™ in Denmark, to another Scot who died of completely natural causes for his nationality.
It is always a tragedy when a Doktor is lost to his own devices. I will issue a statement to the world that in addition to my normal demands, that December 20 shall forever be known as Pentagram/Doktor Vitriol Day, and it will be celebrated by the time honored Scottish traditions. And also, i will be paid an exorbitant some of money in order to carry out deranged experiments. er, um... in his honor of course.
I move to canonize him.
If I let you fire the corpse out of my canon, I'll have to burn it afterwards.
Quote from: Richter on December 20, 2010, 09:24:04 PM
If I let you fire the corpse out of my canon, I'll have to burn it afterwards.
You selfish son of a bitch. I'll have you canonized for that! :argh!:
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 20, 2010, 09:55:16 PM
Quote from: Richter on December 20, 2010, 09:24:04 PM
If I let you fire the corpse out of my canon, I'll have to burn it afterwards.
You selfish son of a bitch. I'll have you canonized for that! :argh!:
I'm going to ruin your cannon, trust me on this.
Isn't that why you soften the skull up?
Thanks guise, your touching eulogies brought a heartfelt lump to my trousers. I shall endeavour to decompose in a manner befitting such fond memories.
Quote from: Doktor Vitriol on December 22, 2010, 11:33:02 PM
Thanks guise, your touching eulogies brought a heartfelt lump to my trousers. I shall endeavour to decompose in a manner befitting such fond memories.
:lulz: