Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: Roaring Biscuit! on March 31, 2011, 05:50:39 PM

Title: ATTN ROGER
Post by: Roaring Biscuit! on March 31, 2011, 05:50:39 PM
I have been reading your recent definitions thread and I believe you may be my mother.  I am unsure of the appropriate course of action.  That is all.
Title: Re: ATTN ROGER
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 31, 2011, 05:56:13 PM
Quote from: Roaring Biscuit! on March 31, 2011, 05:50:39 PM
I have been reading your recent definitions thread and I believe you may be my mother.  I am unsure of the appropriate course of action.  That is all.

The appropriate actions are to:

1.  Stop hanging out with those hooligan friends of yours,

2.  Wear your galoshes, and

3.  Call more often.  It won't kill you.
Title: Re: ATTN ROGER
Post by: Roaring Biscuit! on April 03, 2011, 12:16:13 AM
Leave my hooligan friends out, at least I can trust them, not like those obnoxious, cardboard cut-out, sitcom characters you call friends who are just as likely to sue you as invite you to dinner.  Don't get me started on the galoshes, I'll start wearin' them when you stop buying useless shit.  Frankly, I liked the old kitchen table, IT'S A FUCKING TABLE!  So what if it's got a few gauges and stains on it, all it's gotta fucking do is SUPPORT A PLATE.  Are you honestly surprised that I don't want to come "home" when you keep replacing the shit that I grew up knowing with this shiny modern bullshit?  Are you honestly surprised that I don't particularly look forward to laying awake in bed at 3am listening to you and Sam drunkenly argue about his attempted suicide?

Well there we go, sure it won't hurt me to call.  How about you?
Title: Re: ATTN ROGER
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on April 03, 2011, 03:19:29 AM
Quote from: Roaring Biscuit! on April 03, 2011, 12:16:13 AM
Leave my hooligan friends out, at least I can trust them, not like those obnoxious, cardboard cut-out, sitcom characters you call friends who are just as likely to sue you as invite you to dinner.  Don't get me started on the galoshes, I'll start wearin' them when you stop buying useless shit.  Frankly, I liked the old kitchen table, IT'S A FUCKING TABLE!  So what if it's got a few gauges and stains on it, all it's gotta fucking do is SUPPORT A PLATE.  Are you honestly surprised that I don't want to come "home" when you keep replacing the shit that I grew up knowing with this shiny modern bullshit?  Are you honestly surprised that I don't particularly look forward to laying awake in bed at 3am listening to you and Sam drunkenly argue about his attempted suicide?

Well there we go, sure it won't hurt me to call.  How about you?

One other thing.  Stop using the weed whacker on the plants outside.  All the cord gets used up, and then I can't trim my back.
Title: Re: ATTN ROGER
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 03, 2011, 06:33:45 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 31, 2011, 05:56:13 PM
Quote from: Roaring Biscuit! on March 31, 2011, 05:50:39 PM
I have been reading your recent definitions thread and I believe you may be my mother.  I am unsure of the appropriate course of action.  That is all.

The appropriate actions are to:

1.  Stop hanging out with those hooligan friends of yours,

2.  Wear your galoshes, and

3.  Call more often.  It won't kill you.

:lulz:

I find this oddly adorable.
Title: Re: ATTN ROGER
Post by: Luna on April 03, 2011, 12:10:26 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 03, 2011, 03:19:29 AM
Quote from: Roaring Biscuit! on April 03, 2011, 12:16:13 AM
Leave my hooligan friends out, at least I can trust them, not like those obnoxious, cardboard cut-out, sitcom characters you call friends who are just as likely to sue you as invite you to dinner.  Don't get me started on the galoshes, I'll start wearin' them when you stop buying useless shit.  Frankly, I liked the old kitchen table, IT'S A FUCKING TABLE!  So what if it's got a few gauges and stains on it, all it's gotta fucking do is SUPPORT A PLATE.  Are you honestly surprised that I don't want to come "home" when you keep replacing the shit that I grew up knowing with this shiny modern bullshit?  Are you honestly surprised that I don't particularly look forward to laying awake in bed at 3am listening to you and Sam drunkenly argue about his attempted suicide?

Well there we go, sure it won't hurt me to call.  How about you?

One other thing.  Stop using the weed whacker on the plants outside.  All the cord gets used up, and then I can't trim my back.

Aw, dammit, I got a visual on that one.   :x
Title: Re: ATTN ROGER
Post by: Roaring Biscuit! on April 03, 2011, 01:25:18 PM
QuoteOne other thing.  Stop using the weed whacker on the plants outside.  All the cord gets used up, and then I can't trim my back.

That's no accident, it's payback for last summer.  I mean I know the budget was tight, but when you said we might be staying in some pretty down-trodden places I thought you meant you know...  roadside motels...  not the County Jail.

Oh and by the way, there is no way I'm buying that the doctor actually prescribed that reinforced titanium butt-plug for your condition.  Or that you had to sell my bed to pay for it.