Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: Adios on May 04, 2011, 04:48:12 PM

Title: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Adios on May 04, 2011, 04:48:12 PM
Seems to be rather pissed lately.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Suu on May 04, 2011, 04:49:07 PM
Doesn't this happen like...EVERY YEAR?
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Adios on May 04, 2011, 04:49:38 PM
Not quite to this degree I don't think.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Suu on May 04, 2011, 04:55:37 PM
There was a LOT of snowfall this year. Severe flooding is to be expected. I'm surprised RI didn't go under again.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Adios on May 04, 2011, 04:56:47 PM
Quote from: Suu the Infallible on May 04, 2011, 04:55:37 PM
There was a LOT of snowfall this year. Severe flooding is to be expected. I'm surprised RI didn't go under again.

If Mark Twain were still alive that bitch would behave herself!
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Suu on May 04, 2011, 04:57:37 PM
Naturally.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on May 04, 2011, 08:07:40 PM
I lived in the Quad Cities, Iowa on the part of the Mississippi that flows East to West. It got bitchy every year and flooded two out of three. But from what I'm hearing now it has gone beyond being a little pissy to nearly FEMA intervention enraged. Last time we got a lot of rain there, everyone's basements flooded, all the creeks and ponds backed up, and the river washed away a five block swath of real estate closest to the city. Including a dozen bars, a few churches, and one of the oldest cemeteries.

Everytime a body washed up on the shores for the next year, they had to make sure it wasn't one of the cemetery's 'escapees'. Fun times.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on May 04, 2011, 09:50:59 PM
The most snow the midwest has seen in over 5 years + a shit load of rain + it hasn't really warmed up completely for any length of time + a shit load of rain and storms + the northern Mississippi areas are just now thawing = GIGANTIC FLOODED CLUSTERFUCK!!!!!

I'm on high ground thank goodness but my basement still has water standing in a couple of places.  We already had our washer and dryer on stands that keep them a foot off the ground both neighbors lost theirs when the basement flooded over easter weekend.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: East Coast Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:15:11 AM
Why do people live between the Appalachians and the Rockies, anyway?

I think we should just turn it into one huge national park, with the part known as "Illinois" fenced off and turned into a maximum security prison a la Escape From New York.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Luna on May 05, 2011, 02:19:49 AM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:15:11 AM
Why do people live between the Appalachians and the Rockies, anyway?

I think we should just turn it into one huge national park, with the part known as "Illinois" fenced off and turned into a maximum security prison a la Escape From New York.

Pure curiosity, why Illinois?  I was gonna go for one of the square states that practically nobody actually lives in, anyway, for ease of fencing...
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Jasper on May 05, 2011, 02:41:45 AM
If we fenced up Chicago, the tornados would stop.

I believe this.  That place EXPORTS windy weather.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: East Coast Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:48:24 AM
Quote from: Luna on May 05, 2011, 02:19:49 AM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:15:11 AM
Why do people live between the Appalachians and the Rockies, anyway?

I think we should just turn it into one huge national park, with the part known as "Illinois" fenced off and turned into a maximum security prison a la Escape From New York.

Pure curiosity, why Illinois?  I was gonna go for one of the square states that practically nobody actually lives in, anyway, for ease of fencing...

Because Illinois (at least north of I-70) is the undisputed asshole of American civilization. The plan is to build the fences before anyone even knows about the whole project. We don't want those people relocating to the coasts.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Luna on May 05, 2011, 02:50:30 AM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:48:24 AM
Quote from: Luna on May 05, 2011, 02:19:49 AM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:15:11 AM
Why do people live between the Appalachians and the Rockies, anyway?

I think we should just turn it into one huge national park, with the part known as "Illinois" fenced off and turned into a maximum security prison a la Escape From New York.

Pure curiosity, why Illinois?  I was gonna go for one of the square states that practically nobody actually lives in, anyway, for ease of fencing...

Because Illinois (at least north of I-70) is the undisputed asshole of American civilization. The plan is to build the fences before anyone even knows about the whole project. We don't want those people relocating to the coasts.

Fair enough.   :lulz:
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Suu on May 05, 2011, 05:13:17 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:15:11 AM
Why do people live between the Appalachians and the Rockies, anyway?


I have no idea. I see mountains and my brain goes, "ABORT! ABORT! RETURN TO THE SHORE!"
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 05, 2011, 07:02:30 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:48:24 AM
Quote from: Luna on May 05, 2011, 02:19:49 AM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:15:11 AM
Why do people live between the Appalachians and the Rockies, anyway?

I think we should just turn it into one huge national park, with the part known as "Illinois" fenced off and turned into a maximum security prison a la Escape From New York.

Pure curiosity, why Illinois?  I was gonna go for one of the square states that practically nobody actually lives in, anyway, for ease of fencing...

Because Illinois (at least north of I-70) is the undisputed asshole of American civilization. The plan is to build the fences before anyone even knows about the whole project. We don't want those people relocating to the coasts.

Balls.  Southern Illinois is WAY worse.  Anything Effingham or South, and you're looking at all the worst parts of 1950s America, plus widespread meth use.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Miss Demeanor on May 05, 2011, 07:03:09 PM
It's the result of a La Nina winter.  Strong tornadoes, lots o' flooding, mass chaos, cats & dogs living together!  Or it's the "end times" as the freaky Christians keep trying to warn me about.....seeing as we've NEVER had this kind of weather before. :roll:
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 05, 2011, 07:03:19 PM
Quote from: Suu the Infallible on May 05, 2011, 05:13:17 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 02:15:11 AM
Why do people live between the Appalachians and the Rockies, anyway?


I have no idea. I see mountains and my brain goes, "ABORT! ABORT! RETURN TO THE SHORE!"

On the other hand, it's 90F with 5% humidity up here.  How's things down in your ice age, lowlander?
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: LMNO on May 05, 2011, 07:05:58 PM
I don't think I've had a Spring this nice in years.  I tend to prefer the 45-65F temp range, myself.  Usually, Spring in Boston consists of Thaw, Rain, one week of nice weather, Rain, then 90 degrees and 85% humididty.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Luna on May 05, 2011, 07:07:55 PM
I could stand for a little more warm, a little less damp...
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: East Coast Hustle on May 05, 2011, 07:45:24 PM
Effingham is NOT worse than Ottawa or Joliet.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 05, 2011, 07:47:01 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 07:45:24 PM
Effingham is NOT worse than Ottawa or Joliet.

Effingham IS indeed worse.  In fact, Effingham is almost as bad as fucking MORRIS.

Almost.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: East Coast Hustle on May 05, 2011, 08:01:37 PM
No way. Morris is THE asshole of the universe. Joliet is a close 2nd.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on May 05, 2011, 08:09:21 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 08:01:37 PM
No way. Morris is THE asshole of the universe.

They have webbed toes, there. 
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: East Coast Hustle on May 05, 2011, 08:21:42 PM
I can't believe we forgot about Rockford.

See, it breaks down like this:

North of I-70: Morris, Joliet, Rockford, Ottawa, Peru, Moline, Calumet City

On or south of I-70: Effingham, Cairo, Marion, East St. Louis


Hmm...


You're right. We'll fence the entire thing, with the possible exception of the Shawnee Natl. Forest in the far southeast.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on May 05, 2011, 10:19:19 PM
Am I on the inside or the outside of this fence?  You aren't crossing the river right?

And you both forgot about Cahokia..... I mean seriously...
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: East Coast Hustle on May 05, 2011, 11:17:03 PM
Not only will the fence stop at the river, but what's left of the STL metro area will be GREATLY improved for having Metro East fenced out of existence.
Title: Re: The Mighty Mississippi
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on May 05, 2011, 11:47:04 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 11:17:03 PM
Not only will the fence stop at the river, but what's left of the STL metro area will be GREATLY improved for having Metro East fenced out of existence.

:lulz: This makes me happy!