Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: LMNO on July 14, 2011, 01:14:37 PM

Title: HEY, SUU!
Post by: LMNO on July 14, 2011, 01:14:37 PM
I've been invited this Friday to Mr Goodbar's SUPERPARADISE at Club Oberon.  Yes, it's as gay as it sounds.  The trouble is, well... Here's the description of preferred clothing:

"Dress Code: TOGA TOGA TOGA!|Fur Underwear|Leather Harnesses and broadswords|gladiators and temple slaves|breastplates and metal cuffs|Gorgon Realness|vestal virgins in grecian gowns|ceremonial headdresses|LOTS OF EYE MAKEUP|Viking horns|barbarians in animal pelts|well oiled muscle|animal masks|Red Sonja Effects!"

It might surprise you that I don't have any of this.  Or not.  It's been a while.  Anyway, I was hoping you'd have an idea for something that matches my personality: Cheap, Easy, and Fabulous.

Any thoughts?




PS - Gorgon Realness.  LOL.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Suu on July 14, 2011, 01:20:18 PM
Do you have access to a sewing machine? You can do it without, but I need to know so I can give you appropriate patterns.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: LMNO on July 14, 2011, 01:28:17 PM
No sewing machine.  And very scant ability in the textile arts.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Suu on July 14, 2011, 01:38:59 PM
This can be done.

You will need:

3 yards of FABULOUS.
2 pins
belt

This is some rudimentary Greek shit. What I want you to do us fold your fabulous in half the best way so it covers your butt sufficiently. You can adjust with the belt.

Unfold your fabric, and put your left side inside of that fold, so you have the length of the fabric running from right under your armpit to the length. Hold the open edges (us goddamn industry professionals call that shit the selvages) of the fabric out with your right hand. You may need Mrs. LMNO to help, because you need to keep slack and pin here.

Once your fabric is in place, pin the front and back of the fabric over your left shoulder, giving enough slack for a comfortable armhole, otherwise it'll bite you, plus you want it to be a little saggy for the drapey look. Measure a comfortable neck opening and pin in the same manner on the right shoulder, and let the fabric fall from your hand. You should have a good amount of excess. Wrap the front selvage over the back, and belt tightly.

Underwear optional.

More pins can be used for different sleeve effects.



Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: LMNO on July 14, 2011, 02:08:57 PM
Hm.  This sounds do-able, even if geometry is involved.  Now, to see if I have 3 yeards of FABULOUS. 

I will keep you updated.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Luna on July 14, 2011, 02:27:26 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (deceased) on July 14, 2011, 02:08:57 PM
Hm.  This sounds do-able, even if geometry is involved.  Now, to see if I have 3 yeards of FABULOUS. 

I will keep you updated.

If you do not have and can not obtain yards of FABULOUS, do you deserve this party?
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Suu on July 14, 2011, 02:27:54 PM
I would say cut the fabric in half, but since you don't have a machine, no need to make it fray.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Richter on July 14, 2011, 10:28:30 PM
I got invited to that too.  :lulz:

Damnit, no way to get you stuff in time... I have most of that list lying around my room for fucksake.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Suu on July 14, 2011, 10:30:29 PM
Quote from: Richter on July 14, 2011, 10:28:30 PM
I got invited to that too.  :lulz:

Damnit, no way to get you stuff in time... I have most of that list lying around my room for fucksake.

Fuck no.

He needs to be FABULOUS, not historically accurate.

-Suu
Is going to anachronist hell for that.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Richter on July 14, 2011, 10:34:27 PM
...

HERETIC.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Suu on July 14, 2011, 10:51:31 PM
To be fair, the pattern is perfectly period for Ancient Greece. They hated sewing. Romans, on the other hand...hide yo needles, hide yo thread...
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: LMNO on July 14, 2011, 11:38:59 PM
TRAGEDY.


All of my FABULOUS has already been cut, stitched, and fitted into something called "nice clothes tailored to my figure", and is not available for toga-ing. I may be forced to dust off my leather pants and Bear it out.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Suu on July 14, 2011, 11:45:52 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (deceased) on July 14, 2011, 11:38:59 PM
TRAGEDY.


All of my FABULOUS has already been cut, stitched, and fitted into something called "nice clothes tailored to my figure", and is not available for toga-ing. I may be forced to dust off my leather pants and Bear it out.

Go to Joann's and buy something horrible.

Like this:

(http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a356/theonlyang/257187_10150271618374935_701239934_8833487_3057430_o.jpg)
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Triple Zero on July 15, 2011, 12:30:52 PM
Or even IKEA. Because you basically just need a curtain, right?

Better even IKEA, because you don't just need anything horrible, you need something that's white with silver glitter on it or something similarly fabulous. I believe IKEA curtains can provide that.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Luna on July 15, 2011, 12:56:02 PM
You can't tell me you don't have a FABULOUS bedsheet.  I will lose faith in you forever.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Richter on July 16, 2011, 02:13:58 AM
Quote from: Triple Zero on July 15, 2011, 12:30:52 PM
Or even IKEA. Because you basically just need a curtain, right?

Better even IKEA, because you don't just need anything horrible, you need something that's white with silver glitter on it or something similarly fabulous. I believe IKEA curtains can provide that.

Hell IKEA can provide the furs too.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: LMNO on July 16, 2011, 03:49:32 AM
Dinner was fancy. Drinks were drunk. After that, even more drinks were drunk. FABULOUS cancelled, due to rather egregious SLOPPY.
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Suu on July 16, 2011, 04:08:41 AM
YUO CANNOT CANCEL FABULOUS

:crankey:
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: LMNO on July 16, 2011, 04:13:21 AM
I AM DRUNK, AND FABULOUS. IN MY HOUSE. WEARING NO PANCE. WHAT?
Title: Re: HEY, SUU!
Post by: Suu on July 16, 2011, 04:24:35 AM
THAT IS ACCEPTABLE.

CARRY ON.