Yeah, so the new guy quit, the best I&E tech I have fell off the wagon, the dry side air compressors have BOTH seized up, the budget I handed my boss made him turn purple and foam at the mouth, the cracking tower's acting weird, and the warehouse foreman is speaking in tongues.
I love being me. I love it so much I want to have sex with me. Not masturbation. No. This is DEEPER. I want to procreate with myself. I want to take myself out to dinner and a movie, and maybe cop a feel at the end of the date. I want to marry myself and finally settle down.
IT'S ONLY TUESDAY. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SOMEONE CALL THE HELP DESK!
*ahem* Pay no attention to him, he's just had a really stressful day. It's fucking awesome here. I could retire from this job. It's like having sex with Lady Gaga while drinking big shots of cheap bourbon and smoking Waffle Iron's lutefisk and stuffing Freeky's chemical warfare tomato soup down my throat. I love this shit, motherfucker, I can't help it!
OH, GOD, SOMEBODY KILL MEEEEEEEEEE I LIVE IN HELL!
Shaddap. You know you like it. Now get back out there and figure out what's wrong with that tower.
Or Kill Me. <---- Unnnng
Sorry dude.
Maybe you should take yourself out for dinner and a movie.
The guy screaming in the corner about tuesday.
Quote from: Billy the Twid on January 17, 2012, 09:45:41 PM
The guy screaming in the corner about tuesday.
Don't worry about him, he just needs his medication. He'll be just fine. Right as rain. And he
will learn to stop embarrassing the company. Oh, yes.
It's apparent you work in some sort of factory. Just out if curiosity, what do you make there?
Quote from: rong on January 17, 2012, 10:04:26 PM
It's apparent you work in some sort of factory. Just out if curiosity, what do you make there?
I work in a refinery. We make horrible green goo. Just so's we have something to throw into the Yuma River when nobody's looking.
Oh, far out. I work as an electrician at an osb mill, so a lot of your work related posts resonate with me. I wish our maintenance superintendent was as cool as you.
Good lord, did you not give a proper sacrifice this weekend or something?
Iirc the green goo also is used in a lot of things we would prefer not to know about yes?
Quote from: Billy the Twid on January 17, 2012, 10:28:58 PM
Iirc the green goo also is used in a lot of things we would prefer not to know about yes?
Yes. No. Maybe.
After 2 days, a businessperson is kind of calm.
After 3, however, they have just realized everything that will go wrong. They've sat BOLT upright on Sunday night and gone "oh SHIT.", and thanks to various modern saint's day, they need to stew in it until Tuesday.
Now, given an extra day they'd chill out. They'd learn to really relax, not just unclench their bowels into the cough after the big game's worth of beers. Nope, no such reason though. 4 day weekends would be WASTEFUL. So in we go, all hopped up like a housewife on meth screaming that the pattern on the dishes doesn't line up when they are stacked.
(true story: CLub Med has HUGE fuckign steel containers for any professional. Actual decompression vats. They keep them in there, where it's padded and soft until day 4, feeding teh fuckers high fiber oatmeal. After that, they've let go of work, dropped the magnum deuce impacted in their squealy bowels, and can be turned loose to a standard-issue margarita and beach chair without risk of snapping at the service, the other vacationers, or bouncy-bouncy they stock the place with (like trout). So disarmed, they are then offered time share.)
Just seeing this now. Use a condom. You're not ready for kids with you yet.
Someone threw a ping pong table at me on the highway, yesterday.
Fact.
what the fuck? those fools! THEY CANNOT STOP ROGER!
YOU THINK A PINGPONG TABLE WILL STOP ROGER? A PINGPONG TABLE FOR GIANTS MAYBE, BUT THE PINGPONG TABLE WOULD HAVE TO BE MADE OF SOME IMAGINARY KIND OF METAL LIKE ADAMANTIUM OR PNURTOBIUM OR SOMETHING AND THOSE GIANTS WOULD HAVE TO BE BIG ASS GIANTS WITH SUPREME GAUNTLETS OF PNURTOBIUM PINGPONG TABLE HURLING LIKE ASSHOLES ALL DAY
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 19, 2012, 01:05:52 AM
Someone threw a ping pong table at me on the highway, yesterday.
Fact.
You kept it, right?
Phox,
Totally jealous of Roger's bitchin' new ping-pong table.
I think it's like if you hit a deer in NY state; after all the sobbing and paperwork is done, they have to offer you the deer.
Quote from: Cramulus on January 19, 2012, 01:14:12 AM
what the fuck? those fools! THEY CANNOT STOP ROGER!
I was driving along, screaming at the guy next to me, when this fucking PING PONG TABLE comes flying off the overpass, unfolding like a bird of prey swooping. I hit the gas like a mad bastard...Of course, I'm in the van, which has the pickup of a rascal scooter with a Walmart Queen on it, but I still managed to barely avoid it, and then it was smashed to bits by a semi.
I am told that it was probably strapped to someone's car, and blew off on the bridge, but I know better.
That was Tucson, coming for me.
Time's all stretchy. Seems like these benzos are finally starting to exhibit side effects. No balance, cognitive skills are fine but communication isn't, and EVERYONE'S MOVING IN SLOW MOTION. They take FOREVER to say anything, and though I can see new posts here, everyone is taking ALL DAY viewing and/or responding.
It's just as bad at work. Had a problem with a screw auger, the problem was fucking OBVIOUS, but everyone had to jabber reeeeeeeeally slowly, in an effort to look smart. So I took Ed & Al out and fixed the problem in about 5 minutes. Once it was running, I went back into the conference room and they were STILL jawing about it. I told them that it was running, and what the problem was, and they spend 20 minutes talking about what it COULD have been.
Perhaps even longer than that. By then my right eye was twitching, and I had to leave. So here I am, watching everyone VIEW, and trying to explain to myself that all of you fuckers are running at a different clockspeed, a normal clockspeed where you can tell when your coffee is cool enough to drink.
So it's not you, baby, it's me.
***
Just spent what seemed like an hour abusing some fucking salesman cold calling me.
***
YOU PEOPLE ARE TOO SLOW. You need some medicine.
Hey, now. I spent most of my morning trying to explain the relation of frequency to aesthetics.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 19, 2012, 04:11:35 PM
Hey, now. I spent most of my morning trying to explain the relation of frequency to aesthetics.
Which kinda frequency? Because if it's electrical/signal frequency, I can see your problem. If it's "the amount of a phenomenom occurs, then you just punch them. Frequently. They'll get the picture. They might even talk amongst themselves, as they nurse their wounds over a chai latte mochafrappa thingie down at the coffee shop.
If you saw any posts which appeared to be from me recently which had any content you may have liked or agreed with, it wasn't posted by me. It was a forgery by my Millions of Evil Enemies and Bitter Jealous Failed Rivals trying to make me look like as much of a pathetic failure as they are. If there's no hate, it ain't TGRR.
Check your shoes for my vomit. If it's there, the post was legit.
TGRR,
Bored bored bored bored bored