<begin transcript>
Me and Deke went out to the bar the other night, right? We got a little messed up out in the parking lot first, with some shit Deke bought off a hipster on the East end. It must have been some good shit, because when we went in, there was like a few hundred chicks that all looked the same.
I had a few drinks, and was getting pretty happy, when one of the chicks walked past me. She was pretty hot, so I gave her a little swat on the butt, you know, just to let her know I was interested. Well, all them chicks looked at me all at the same time, and they snarled.
Next thing I know, this chick pushes me out of my chair and then stomps on my junk. I let out a yelp, and the next thing I know, I'm having the shit kicked out of me. Felt like there was a whole crowd kicking at me and punching me on the ears. Then I'm flying. You know, through the air. I land in the parking lot next to Deke's truck. Deke, he gets 10 out of 10 for his disappearing act, the bastard. Never could count on him to have my back.
Well, the cops show up, and they take me down to the station. I complain about the chick who kicked my ass, and they say, "Yeah, we'll get to that. We picked her up." And then they charge me with public intoxication.
Next morning, they bring me up from the cells, and tell me they think they have the right lady, but I'd have to pick her out of a lineup. Now, I remembered exactly what this girl looked like, so I figure it's no big deal. They take me to the room with the one-way mirror, and then they turn on the light inside the other room...And there's six women in there, and they all look the fucking same.
I guess I got a little freaked out, because I start screaming and hollering, and pretty soon the two cops with me are working me over with their nightsticks. Then they throw me back in here. Yesterday, they say they're going to cut me loose, so I pop the guard one in the jaw. Now I'm in for a while...And thank God. I ain't EVER going back out there. It's just too damn weird.
<end transcript>
The above is the testimony of one Arthur James, who subsequently became hysterical upon seeing a new female guard that had started work at the jail. He is now in the Oregon State Facility for the Mentally Ill.
This needs to be an ongoing series.
Quote from: navkat on March 19, 2012, 04:29:31 PM
This needs to be an ongoing series.
I have enough material for 5 stories. After that, we'll see.
I'm really enjoying it, so far.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on March 19, 2012, 04:43:32 PM
I'm really enjoying it, so far.
Thanks. I expect part 3 will be out tomorrow.
Very nice. Somewhat terrifying.
Arthur James could be out of society and out of the story.
Or one of the Nigels could hire on at the Oregon State Facility for the Mentally Ill.
Dammit, another cliffhanger. :lulz:
I love cliffhangers. :)
Ooooh, this fills me with GLEE
SO MUCH GLEE!!!!