Is what I did during a school "field-trip" to the RISD art museum the other day.
I touched an ancient Chinese dragon, Vishnu (somewhat appropriately), various Taoist statuettes, and the giant wooden Buddha, among other things.
I think I have a fetish for very old objects.
I mean, they just left them out in the open. No ropes or glass cases. It's like they were asking me too. Is that bad?
If you think it is, what's coming next is going to be worse.
I'm going to go back there (only three bucks with my student ID! Woot!)...
And lick the ancient Chinese dragon.
I support your campaign of licking very old objects.
I'd like to go back to the pyramids again, and maybe cough on some frescoes.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 23, 2012, 09:34:00 PM
I'd like to go back to the pyramids again, and maybe cough on some frescoes.
:lol: :horrormirth:
Personally, I like to perform acts of frotteurism to Munch paintings and lewd sculptures.
that's illegal stateside.
i've heard it's quite the thing in Japan, however...
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 23, 2012, 10:10:19 PM
Personally, I like to perform acts of frotteurism to Munch paintings and lewd sculptures.
That's cool, and all, but the licking makes for a full-sensory experience. I suggest you integrate it into your non-consensual pelvis-on-art bump n' grinding.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 23, 2012, 09:34:00 PM
I'd like to go back to the pyramids again, and maybe cough on some frescoes.
Next time you're here you need to meet our buddy who played with the head of Ur.
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 23, 2012, 09:31:22 PM
Is what I did during a school "field-trip" to the RISD art museum the other day.
I touched an ancient Chinese dragon, Vishnu (somewhat appropriately), various Taoist statuettes, and the giant wooden Buddha, among other things.
I think I have a fetish for very old objects.
I mean, they just left them out in the open. No ropes or glass cases. It's like they were asking me too. Is that bad?
If you think it is, what's coming next is going to be worse.
I'm going to go back there (only three bucks with my student ID! Woot!)...
And lick the ancient Chinese dragon.
Fuck. Call me. I need to be there for this. I will only be "Help", I promise.
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 23, 2012, 09:31:22 PM
And lick the ancient Chinese dragon.
:lmnuendo:
Quote from: Iptuous on April 23, 2012, 09:33:37 PM
I support your campaign of licking very old objects.
:lmnuendo: !!!
I used to go around pissing on things. Monuments of note include a small obelisk marking the geographical centre of Tennessee in Murfressboro. The most Southerly Point of the Continental USA marker in Key West, Florida. The Big Banana in Coffs Harbour, Australia, and various war memorials. Couldn't muster up the courage at all the statues of Simon Bolivar in South America, though, and there were too many mean looking police at the Big Jesus in Rio. I guess I just wasn't prepared to die for my art, at the time.
Quote from: Richter on April 24, 2012, 03:37:16 AM
Fuck. Call me. I need to be there for this. I will only be "Help", I promise.
I planned on it. I need witnesses for this. Thing is, we have to look
very serious about being there, otherwise we may rouse the guards' suspicions.
Quote from: navkat on April 24, 2012, 03:46:05 AM
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 23, 2012, 09:31:22 PM
And lick the ancient Chinese dragon.
:lmnuendo:
Yeah, I said it. What of it?
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 24, 2012, 04:26:01 AM
Quote from: Richter on April 24, 2012, 03:37:16 AM
Fuck. Call me. I need to be there for this. I will only be "Help", I promise.
I planned on it. I need witnesses for this. Thing is, we have to look very serious about being there, otherwise we may rouse the guards' suspicions.
We may need to be shirt and tie country for this. WE also need to have a good spiel about how we're either trying to "absorb art by homepathy", or "We thought it was some student's weird artsy chocolate thing!"
Quote from: Richter on April 24, 2012, 04:28:46 AM
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 24, 2012, 04:26:01 AM
Quote from: Richter on April 24, 2012, 03:37:16 AM
Fuck. Call me. I need to be there for this. I will only be "Help", I promise.
I planned on it. I need witnesses for this. Thing is, we have to look very serious about being there, otherwise we may rouse the guards' suspicions.
We may need to be shirt and tie country for this. WE also need to have a good spiel about how we're either trying to "absorb art by homepathy", or "We thought it was some student's weird artsy chocolate thing!"
Richter, when the Great Game of Dodgeball of the Endtimes gets played, remind me to pick you first for my team.
Quote from: Richter on April 24, 2012, 04:28:46 AM
We may need to be shirt and tie country for this. WE also need to have a good spiel about how we're either trying to "absorb art by homepathy", or "We thought it was some student's weird artsy chocolate thing!"
I gave up ties and buttons when I gave up working with the public. But I can snazz myself up a touch. We need to get leln and Ang and go as a "family." I mean, collectively, we're fairly "knowledgeable" about "art." And you and your sister are
perfect for a museum environment; so delightfully polite and unassuming, it would be fucking hilarious. It needs to be done. Pics if possible.
Hell. I think, this summer, instead of eating all different types of food while in swimming pools, I'm going to hit all the museums, and lick art.
It really would be easy to do, most of the stuff is nearly head-level. It'll be getting photographic evidence that will be difficult.
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 24, 2012, 04:53:58 AM
It really would be easy to do, most of the stuff is nearly head-level. It'll be getting photographic evidence that will be difficult.
No cell phones allowed?
:?
Quote from: Deepthroat Chopra on April 24, 2012, 04:00:43 AM
I used to go around pissing on things.
I had a dog that did that.
WHY ISN'T THIS THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER???
:crankey:
Quote from: Nigel on April 24, 2012, 02:42:55 PM
WHY ISN'T THIS THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER???
:crankey:
At first, I was all like "WHY ISN'T
EVERY THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER?"
And then I looked at the title again, and I was like
:walken:
Revenge will be mine, you latte-slurping Portland Bastiche!
Quote from: Iptuous on April 24, 2012, 05:59:41 AM
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 24, 2012, 04:53:58 AM
It really would be easy to do, most of the stuff is nearly head-level. It'll be getting photographic evidence that will be difficult.
No cell phones allowed?
:?
Yeah, they're allowed, we're just gonna have to be slick about it.
Quote from: Nigel on April 24, 2012, 02:42:55 PM
WHY ISN'T THIS THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER???
:crankey:
No offense, I don't care
how old Rogers balls are, I am
not licking them. It's too close to his Holy hate-shitting hole. I'd be too afraid of blow-back.
Plus, I'm a selfish prick that can't be bothered to provide a decent reach-around.
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 24, 2012, 02:25:30 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 23, 2012, 10:10:19 PM
Personally, I like to perform acts of frotteurism to Munch paintings and lewd sculptures.
That's cool, and all, but the licking makes for a full-sensory experience. I suggest you integrate it into your non-consensual pelvis-on-art bump n' grinding.
I will definitely try licking Munch's Madonna the next time around!
Thanks!
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 24, 2012, 04:15:08 PM
Quote from: Cuddlefish on April 24, 2012, 02:25:30 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 23, 2012, 10:10:19 PM
Personally, I like to perform acts of frotteurism to Munch paintings and lewd sculptures.
That's cool, and all, but the licking makes for a full-sensory experience. I suggest you integrate it into your non-consensual pelvis-on-art bump n' grinding.
I will definitely try licking Munch's Madonna the next time around!
Thanks!
Hey, whatever turns you on, man.
*waits till no one is looking
* :fap: :fap: :fap:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 24, 2012, 02:45:22 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 24, 2012, 02:42:55 PM
WHY ISN'T THIS THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER???
:crankey:
At first, I was all like "WHY ISN'T EVERY THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER?"
And then I looked at the title again, and I was like
:walken:
Revenge will be mine, you latte-slurping Portland Bastiche!
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Now I am reminded of this Dutch kid that was videoed a few years ago giggling like a hysterical teenager as he slapped his penis against the Taj Mahal (you don't see the penis, so it's probably still on youtube somewhere).
So, mission accomplished. I licked the Chinese dragon (VERY intimidating, once you're face to face with the thing) and the big toe of Shiva. Sorry, no pics, but Twid and Suu saw me lick the dragon, and Rich provided cover from the security cameras while I licked Shiva's toe. Sure, pics would have been nice, but I have very credible witnesses. (In fact, Rich was so good at witnessing, he could be called an incredible witness).
Quote from: Cuddlefish on May 13, 2012, 06:57:33 PM
So, mission accomplished. I licked the Chinese dragon (VERY intimidating, once you're face to face with the thing) and the big toe of Shiva. Sorry, no pics, but Twid and Suu saw me lick the dragon, and Rich provided cover from the security cameras while I licked Shiva's toe. Sure, pics would have been nice, but I have very credible witnesses. (In fact, Rich was so good at witnessing, he could be called an incredible witness).
The best part of it was just afterward some security guy or docent or something came bolting into the room.
And then he bolted into a completely different one.
I like the idea of getting thrown out of a museum for licking the antiquities.
Quote from: Chronicles of Twiddick on May 13, 2012, 07:00:15 PM
Quote from: Cuddlefish on May 13, 2012, 06:57:33 PM
So, mission accomplished. I licked the Chinese dragon (VERY intimidating, once you're face to face with the thing) and the big toe of Shiva. Sorry, no pics, but Twid and Suu saw me lick the dragon, and Rich provided cover from the security cameras while I licked Shiva's toe. Sure, pics would have been nice, but I have very credible witnesses. (In fact, Rich was so good at witnessing, he could be called an incredible witness).
The best part of it was just afterward some security guy or docent or something came bolting into the room.
And then he bolted into a completely different one.
I remember there was that one with the Black Sabbath ring tone too.
Yeah, we looked about as far from trouble makers as possible.