Lately I've been really, really down. I don't know why, exactly. All the things that bother me and makes me want to dig a deep fucking hole in my lawn and jump into it head first are things that only four weeks ago, I'd laugh at.
I've suffered from depression and somewhat mild anxiety attacks for a little over a decade. The last four years have seen me on a steady rise from the pit I was in from 2002-2006.
Now, it's as if I've been sent back seven years.
I really do not have a god damn thing to complain about, other than my three dislocated spinal disks and periodical migraines, but I am so goddamn fucking unhappy.
I'm so lonesome I could cry, as the song goes. But I cannot cry. I have a constant lump in my throat, and whenever I'm alone, I feel like I'm on the verge of bursting into tears any moment.
The fact that I'm between jobs doesn't bother me much at all, to be honest. I'll find a job soon enough.
The fact that I was out sick from my previous job for well over a year doesn't bother me much.
What DOES make me horribly, terribly depressed, on the other hand, is the fact that I am completely and utterly unable to maintain a romantic relationship. And I don't know why.
I see only two reasons for this, both of them equally ego shattering to think about.
Either, I have fallen into a decade long pattern of falling for emotionally and mentally unstable women, immature women, violently jealous women (who also happens to fuck people I thought were friends behind my back).
OR, I am such a horrible person to live with that I scare women away.
This is what runs around my head every fucking day, and has for weeks. And I am fucking tired of it! I thought I was finished with this shit six years ago.
I just want it to stop.
Last night I watched the newest Big Bang Theory episode, and I HAD A COMPLETE AND UTTERLY TOTAL FUCKING EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN!
I curled up on the floor in a fetal position and wept and wept and wept for two straight hours.
I didn't feel any better afterwards
Waffle Iron,
Snot-stached emo kid.
This is where I desperately wish I had sage words of advice to offer...
I don't have a lot to offer beyond sympathy, Waffle Iron. Hang in there.
Aww, Waffle Iron. :(
If you were not on a different continent, I'd give you a hug and bake you cookies.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 01:54:12 AM
Lately I've been really, really down. I don't know why, exactly. All the things that bother me and makes me want to dig a deep fucking hole in my lawn and jump into it head first are things that only four weeks ago, I'd laugh at.
I've suffered from depression and somewhat mild anxiety attacks for a little over a decade. The last four years have seen me on a steady rise from the pit I was in from 2002-2006.
Now, it's as if I've been sent back seven years.
I really do not have a god damn thing to complain about, other than my three dislocated spinal disks and periodical migraines, but I am so goddamn fucking unhappy.
I'm so lonesome I could cry, as the song goes. But I cannot cry. I have a constant lump in my throat, and whenever I'm alone, I feel like I'm on the verge of bursting into tears any moment.
The fact that I'm between jobs doesn't bother me much at all, to be honest. I'll find a job soon enough.
The fact that I was out sick from my previous job for well over a year doesn't bother me much.
What DOES make me horribly, terribly depressed, on the other hand, is the fact that I am completely and utterly unable to maintain a romantic relationship. And I don't know why.
I see only two reasons for this, both of them equally ego shattering to think about.
Either, I have fallen into a decade long pattern of falling for emotionally and mentally unstable women, immature women, violently jealous women (who also happens to fuck people I thought were friends behind my back).
OR, I am such a horrible person to live with that I scare women away.
This is what runs around my head every fucking day, and has for weeks. And I am fucking tired of it! I thought I was finished with this shit six years ago.
I just want it to stop.
Last night I watched the newest Big Bang Theory episode, and I HAD A COMPLETE AND UTTERLY TOTAL FUCKING EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN!
I curled up on the floor in a fetal position and wept and wept and wept for two straight hours.
I didn't feel any better afterwards
Waffle Iron,
Snot-stached emo kid.
You sound like you could use a little Holiness
TM.
I just want to say that I barely even know anything about you, but from what I've seen so far you seem like a cool guy in my book. Hang in there brother, theres probably a Mrs. Waffle Iron out there somewhere in a similar dilemma because you haven't come along and brightened her life yet.
Quote from: Nigel on April 28, 2012, 03:37:55 AM
Aww, Waffle Iron. :(
If you were not on a different continent, I'd give you a hug and bake you cookies.
This. Only I'd bake brownies, 'cause I do them better than cookies.
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
Don't be... It's important to you, and that's fine. Been through it, myself. I suspect most of us have, at one point or another. You FEEL, and, trust me, that's just fine. I'm no stranger to curl-up-on-the-floor-and-cry nights... They suck (which is an epic understatement).
Don't be so hard on yourself. Getting angry only will make you more depressed. Try practicing not caring that you're depressed, and work your way up from there.
The crazy seems to be going around a lot right now :(
Oh, I can identify. Except maybe the bit about romantic relationships (I don't have those at all (yet, hopefully)).
But yeah, depression and anxiety hits me at irregular intervals. It sucks.
I don't really have any good advice to offer, either. :sad:
One suggestion: Don't watch Chuck Lorre sitcoms when you feel down. That awful canned laughter is enough to drive any sane person to tears.
Don't totally blame yourself until you KNOW. Sometimes people just have a long run of shit luck, but it runs out of steam eventually.
I have noticed that people who are in a hurry to get to the Serious RelationshipTM stage and rush things along tend to be the psychos and control freaks. That's problematic when you're LOOKING for something serious.
Maybe try keeping things at friends with benefits for an extended period until you really know what the deal is?
Quote from: Insanity on April 29, 2012, 12:16:08 AM
One suggestion: Don't watch Chuck Lorre sitcoms when you feel down. That awful canned laughter is enough to drive any sane person to tears.
Oh you WISH that was canned laughter. It's
not.Ima let that sink in.
WAFFLE IRON: BRO. Breakdowns are good, even if you don't feel better afterwards.
And I know where you're coming from with a lot of that. We live in a similar climate and we seem to have similar taste in women. :lol:
The only advice I can give I feel you probably already know: You must take that "horrible to live with" quality and take it ALL THE WAY TO THE WALL.
These people who cannot handle it? They are not worthy. Period.
Someone will find those same qualities as GOOD things.
Unless, you know, you're some kind of god damned Scandinavian furry (an elk?).
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the Holiness
TM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 07:48:32 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: This.
We're all fucked! Join the party! There's tea and vindaloo and...we can't decide if that's caek or pie. And now WAFFLES!.
*Hugz*
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 07:48:32 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
This is a good plan!
Also, I will reply to everyone of you as soon as I manage to get my thoughts in order. :)
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 02:54:08 PM
Also, I will reply to everyone of you as soon as I manage to get my thoughts in order. :)
Why wait? It's more honest when it's all jumbled... And writing it out scrambled can help get it straight in your own skull.
(Even if you don't post it, write it out and LOOK at what you're thinking. Don't think, just spit it out and see what's going on in there.)
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 02:44:48 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 07:48:32 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
This is a good plan!
Okay, your Holy Quest
TM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 08:42:16 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 02:44:48 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 07:48:32 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
This is a good plan!
Okay, your Holy QuestTM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Now that is Holiness™ I can enjoy!
Thanks, Dok. But since I have nothing but free time, I'll spend Monday and Tuesday outside. :)
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 09:07:05 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 08:42:16 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 02:44:48 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 07:48:32 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
This is a good plan!
Okay, your Holy QuestTM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Now that is Holiness™ I can enjoy!
Thanks, Dok. But since I have nothing but free time, I'll spend Monday and Tuesday outside. :)
A week, sir. Trust the Doktor.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 09:08:29 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 09:07:05 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 08:42:16 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 02:44:48 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 07:48:32 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
This is a good plan!
Okay, your Holy QuestTM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Now that is Holiness™ I can enjoy!
Thanks, Dok. But since I have nothing but free time, I'll spend Monday and Tuesday outside. :)
A week, sir. Trust the Doktor.
I'm fucking blind. Ok! The entire week. I trust the Doktor.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 09:10:28 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 09:08:29 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 09:07:05 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 08:42:16 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 02:44:48 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 07:48:32 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
This is a good plan!
Okay, your Holy QuestTM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Now that is Holiness™ I can enjoy!
Thanks, Dok. But since I have nothing but free time, I'll spend Monday and Tuesday outside. :)
A week, sir. Trust the Doktor.
I'm fucking blind. Ok! The entire week. I trust the Doktor.
It will change everything. Possibly even your life.
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 09:55:15 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 09:10:28 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 09:08:29 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 09:07:05 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 08:42:16 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 29, 2012, 02:44:48 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 29, 2012, 07:48:32 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 05:58:02 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
You want the HolinessTM or not? If it gets cold, it gets all crusty.
Just fucking get it all over him, and then ask him if he wants a towel.
This is a good plan!
Okay, your Holy QuestTM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Now that is Holiness™ I can enjoy!
Thanks, Dok. But since I have nothing but free time, I'll spend Monday and Tuesday outside. :)
A week, sir. Trust the Doktor.
I'm fucking blind. Ok! The entire week. I trust the Doktor.
It will change everything. Possibly even your life.
I have no doubts. You guys are some of the kindest, smartest, and cleverest people I have ever had the honor of virtually meeting.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 08:42:16 PM
Okay, your Holy QuestTM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Day 1. Monday.
I met my sister today. I haven't seen her since February 2011.
She brought her new "pal", whose penis she currently enjoys. We (me and him) talked for quite a while, and it turns out that he is Swedish (East Belgium, for you amerispags).
I also noticed, with this guy, compared to my Sister's former boyfriends (she pointed out repeatedly that he was NOT her boyfriend, though), that she goes out of her way to pick fellers that does not in any way remind her of our father or.. well.. me. Also, he's Bisexual.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 30, 2012, 09:07:12 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 08:42:16 PM
Okay, your Holy QuestTM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Day 1. Monday.
I met my sister today. I haven't seen her since February 2011.
She brought her new "pal", whose penis she currently enjoys. We (me and him) talked for quite a while, and it turns out that he is Swedish (East Belgium, for you amerispags).
I also noticed, with this guy, compared to my Sister's former boyfriends (she pointed out repeatedly that he was NOT her boyfriend, though), that she goes out of her way to pick fellers that does not in any way remind her of our father or.. well.. me. Also, he's Bisexual.
What's the best thing about the guy that you saw?
What's the worst?
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 30, 2012, 09:12:24 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 30, 2012, 09:07:12 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 29, 2012, 08:42:16 PM
Okay, your Holy QuestTM: You will spend your free time this week OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. You will in fact meet at least one new person each day, and find out one interesting thing about each person. You will record the results here.
Day 1. Monday.
I met my sister today. I haven't seen her since February 2011.
She brought her new "pal", whose penis she currently enjoys. We (me and him) talked for quite a while, and it turns out that he is Swedish (East Belgium, for you amerispags).
I also noticed, with this guy, compared to my Sister's former boyfriends (she pointed out repeatedly that he was NOT her boyfriend, though), that she goes out of her way to pick fellers that does not in any way remind her of our father or.. well.. me. Also, he's Bisexual.
What's the best thing about the guy that you saw?
What's the worst?
The best part: He seems to make my sister happy. She's more vibrant than I've seen her in six years.
Worst part: not sure about this, but he strikes me as a pushover, which I am 100% certain will make my sister go insane in not a very long time.
All in all, I liked him.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 30, 2012, 09:17:39 PM
The best part: He seems to make my sister happy.
Well, I think I see the problem.
But I need verification. Will watch for tomorrow's report.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
Oh man, I know where you're coming from with that.
It's probably the most insidious part about clinical depression: recognizing it's a sickness is step 1 of getting better, but it's very easy to get stuck on it.
"I know that I have no real reason to feel like such crap. Somehow I am
making myself be this miserable, and I hate that. Fuck you, self! You worthless piece of shit, stop being me who is hating myself and feeling shitty and NNNYYYAAAARRRRRRRGHFUCKFUCKFUCK!"
Been there more times than I care to count. Keep on Holy Questing
TM.
Quote from: Cainad on May 01, 2012, 05:14:25 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
Oh man, I know where you're coming from with that.
It's probably the most insidious part about clinical depression: recognizing it's a sickness is step 1 of getting better, but it's very easy to get stuck on it.
"I know that I have no real reason to feel like such crap. Somehow I am making myself be this miserable, and I hate that. Fuck you, self! You worthless piece of shit, stop being me who is hating myself and feeling shitty and NNNYYYAAAARRRRRRRGHFUCKFUCKFUCK!"
Been there more times than I care to count. Keep on Holy QuestingTM.
Cainad rides with no sign of priaprism.
You're okay in here. Nothin dirty about getting yourself sorted. If your response to depression is to go home and beat your wife...well...you'd just better start saying some Hail Nigels if ya know what I mean.
Quote from: navkat on May 01, 2012, 12:36:16 PM
Cainad rides with no sign of priaprism.
I have priaprism, and I haven't ridden in years. :sad:
Quote from: Cainad on May 01, 2012, 05:14:25 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
Oh man, I know where you're coming from with that.
It's probably the most insidious part about clinical depression: recognizing it's a sickness is step 1 of getting better, but it's very easy to get stuck on it.
"I know that I have no real reason to feel like such crap. Somehow I am making myself be this miserable, and I hate that. Fuck you, self! You worthless piece of shit, stop being me who is hating myself and feeling shitty and NNNYYYAAAARRRRRRRGHFUCKFUCKFUCK!"
Been there more times than I care to count. Keep on Holy QuestingTM.
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2011/10/adventures-in-depression.html
Nigel, that Hyperbole and a Half episode is fucking brilliant! Thanks!
Cainad: NYYYYARRRGGGGFUCKFUCKFUCK indeed. Blah. I will Holy Quest™ until I croak.
Holy Quest™ day two.
International worker's day in Europe. Everything's closed, almost, and not a single soul outside. Spent a good hour walking in the woods, then to the pizza restaurant. Chatted a bit with the proprietor while he cooked pizzas, and we were waiting for the clerk to finish taking orders by phone. He gave us free ice cream. He doesn't exactly qualify as someone new, as he's been running that place for a decade, but he is as close as I get today, since as I said, there were nobody out and about.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 01, 2012, 11:54:54 PM
Nigel, that Hyperbole and a Half episode is fucking brilliant! Thanks!
Cainad: NYYYYARRRGGGGFUCKFUCKFUCK indeed. Blah. I will Holy Quest™ until I croak.
Holy Quest™ day two.
International worker's day in Europe. Everything's closed, almost, and not a single soul outside. Spent a good hour walking in the woods, then to the pizza restaurant. Chatted a bit with the proprietor while he cooked pizzas, and we were waiting for the clerk to finish taking orders by phone. He gave us free ice cream. He doesn't exactly qualify as someone new, as he's been running that place for a decade, but he is as close as I get today, since as I said, there were nobody out and about.
Did you learn anything new about him?
Quote from: Nigel on May 01, 2012, 04:16:09 PM
Quote from: Cainad on May 01, 2012, 05:14:25 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 28, 2012, 12:35:44 PM
Thanks everyone.
You warm my heart. :)
I am really just pissed off at myself for letting this get to me so hard.
Oh man, I know where you're coming from with that.
It's probably the most insidious part about clinical depression: recognizing it's a sickness is step 1 of getting better, but it's very easy to get stuck on it.
"I know that I have no real reason to feel like such crap. Somehow I am making myself be this miserable, and I hate that. Fuck you, self! You worthless piece of shit, stop being me who is hating myself and feeling shitty and NNNYYYAAAARRRRRRRGHFUCKFUCKFUCK!"
Been there more times than I care to count. Keep on Holy QuestingTM.
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2011/10/adventures-in-depression.html
QuoteI would often fantasize that maybe someday I could be one of those stoic badasses whose emotions are mostly comprised of rock music and not being afraid of things.
This part here! Fake it til you make it. There's occasionally days I actually feel like I'm almost there but most of the time I look like I am and even that helps.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 02, 2012, 01:55:53 PM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 01, 2012, 11:54:54 PM
Nigel, that Hyperbole and a Half episode is fucking brilliant! Thanks!
Cainad: NYYYYARRRGGGGFUCKFUCKFUCK indeed. Blah. I will Holy Quest™ until I croak.
Holy Quest™ day two.
International worker's day in Europe. Everything's closed, almost, and not a single soul outside. Spent a good hour walking in the woods, then to the pizza restaurant. Chatted a bit with the proprietor while he cooked pizzas, and we were waiting for the clerk to finish taking orders by phone. He gave us free ice cream. He doesn't exactly qualify as someone new, as he's been running that place for a decade, but he is as close as I get today, since as I said, there were nobody out and about.
Did you learn anything new about him?
Actually, I did. He is the quintessential gruff owner, who never smiles. So that he gave us ice cream, and was generally pleasant was a new experience.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 02, 2012, 07:53:48 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 02, 2012, 01:55:53 PM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 01, 2012, 11:54:54 PM
Nigel, that Hyperbole and a Half episode is fucking brilliant! Thanks!
Cainad: NYYYYARRRGGGGFUCKFUCKFUCK indeed. Blah. I will Holy Quest™ until I croak.
Holy Quest™ day two.
International worker's day in Europe. Everything's closed, almost, and not a single soul outside. Spent a good hour walking in the woods, then to the pizza restaurant. Chatted a bit with the proprietor while he cooked pizzas, and we were waiting for the clerk to finish taking orders by phone. He gave us free ice cream. He doesn't exactly qualify as someone new, as he's been running that place for a decade, but he is as close as I get today, since as I said, there were nobody out and about.
Did you learn anything new about him?
Actually, I did. He is the quintessential gruff owner, who never smiles. So that he gave us ice cream, and was generally pleasant was a new experience.
On the next one, try meeting someone with which you have no previous connections.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 02, 2012, 07:55:50 PM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 02, 2012, 07:53:48 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 02, 2012, 01:55:53 PM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 01, 2012, 11:54:54 PM
Nigel, that Hyperbole and a Half episode is fucking brilliant! Thanks!
Cainad: NYYYYARRRGGGGFUCKFUCKFUCK indeed. Blah. I will Holy Quest™ until I croak.
Holy Quest™ day two.
International worker's day in Europe. Everything's closed, almost, and not a single soul outside. Spent a good hour walking in the woods, then to the pizza restaurant. Chatted a bit with the proprietor while he cooked pizzas, and we were waiting for the clerk to finish taking orders by phone. He gave us free ice cream. He doesn't exactly qualify as someone new, as he's been running that place for a decade, but he is as close as I get today, since as I said, there were nobody out and about.
Did you learn anything new about him?
Actually, I did. He is the quintessential gruff owner, who never smiles. So that he gave us ice cream, and was generally pleasant was a new experience.
On the next one, try meeting someone with which you have no previous connections.
Of course. I did so today, actually. Yesterday was "special" since there were no people outside.
Will post todays status report as soon as I have made myself something to eat.
Day three: got up early (ish) for once. Took the train to Oslo, picked up a couple of concert tickets for some friends of mine, chatted with the proprietors of the shop the tickets were located. One of them apparently works for Turbonegro in his spare time.
Sat out in the sun for an hour and read.
Went to my former job and told my boss I wanted the final paycheck ASAP.
Went to get fitted for a costume for a TV commercial I'm going to act in. The woman who I have previously spoken with over the phone previously, turned out to be much nicer in person than on the phone. Didn't learn too much about her since it was a hectic environment with four others being fitted at the same time, but she was pleasant and had a winning smile.
Then, I went back out into the sun, read a bit, checked the internetz on my phone.
A girl had sent me a message on a dating site for weirdoes I frequent. I messaged her back and said, meet me for a cup of coffee! She, amazingly, said yes.
She was about to travel to visit friends, so I only saw her for 20 minutes, but it was a good twenty minutes.
She's from the north, like I am. She's practically just as perverted as I am, which is obviously a good thing, but I didn't talk too much abut that when we met, but rather via text messages afterwards.
Her favorite authors are Terry Pratchett (YAY) and Paolo Cohelo (meh).
She's 25 and has a brother that's one and a half years old.
All in all a very good day. :)
Well done. How's your outlook coming along?
I'm back. I went away to visit me mum on Thursday, since I was flat out broke. Had a good time there, walking the dog and starting a fundraiser for my favorite celebrity crush Amanda Palmer, which led to me getting to know a bunch of great people and starting the incredibky cheesy Uke Against the Machine project.
My outlook has improved significantly, and while I'm not un-depressed, I am much, MUCH less prone to foetal positioned despair on the floor.
I cannot thank you guys enough!
From the bottom of my heart, I adore you!
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 06, 2012, 09:28:05 PM
I'm back. I went away to visit me mum on Thursday, since I was flat out broke. Had a good time there, walking the dog and starting a fundraiser for my favorite celebrity crush Amanda Palmer, which led to me getting to know a bunch of great people and starting the incredibky cheesy Uke Against the Machine project.
My outlook has improved significantly, and while I'm not un-depressed, I am much, MUCH less prone to foetal positioned despair on the floor.
I cannot thank you guys enough!
From the bottom of my heart, I adore you!
Oh, that chick from Dresden Dolls! I love the jeep song.
That's one of my favorites as well. That and The Gardener.
Anyways, if we make it (and we will!), she will come to my house to host an epic party next year.
Monday, day eight (that's right, I'm not stopping this).
I spent twelve hours on set for the movie I'm an extra in. Only three and a hald hours were spent actually filming, so the rest of the time I smoked, drank coffee and made new friends. The one I talked to the most turned out to be a mutual friend of an old pal. Great guy, hobby photographer like me. Has a girlfriend in South Africa. Swam with sharks once, he told me, which is something I really, really want to do. Very talkative, which is good for me, since I'm not a naturally talkative guy. I have to learn and relearn it from time to time, especially after periods of isolation.
The lead actor in the movie turned out to be a nice sort of fellow too. Took the time to chat with every extra, which I liked.
I even got paid for this! Not much, mind you, but still.
Now I'm tired, but relatively happy.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 08, 2012, 12:17:21 AM
Monday, day eight (that's right, I'm not stopping this).
Excellent.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 08, 2012, 12:17:21 AM
Swam with sharks once, he told me, which is something I really, really want to do.
Old chum of yours, then?
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 08, 2012, 12:18:56 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 08, 2012, 12:17:21 AM
Monday, day eight (that's right, I'm not stopping this).
Excellent.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 08, 2012, 12:17:21 AM
Swam with sharks once, he told me, which is something I really, really want to do.
Old chum of yours, then?
The guy I met today or the sharks?
(I'm not being deliberately obtuse here, I'm seriously that slow right now)
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 08, 2012, 12:25:03 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 08, 2012, 12:18:56 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 08, 2012, 12:17:21 AM
Monday, day eight (that's right, I'm not stopping this).
Excellent.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 08, 2012, 12:17:21 AM
Swam with sharks once, he told me, which is something I really, really want to do.
Old chum of yours, then?
The guy I met today or the sharks?
(I'm not being deliberately obtuse here, I'm seriously that slow right now)
Quotechum
Listen See in ThesaurusSee in a sentence
A chum is a good friend. (noun)
An example of a chum is a friend you enjoy going out to lunch with.
Chum is cut up pieces of fish scattered into the water when fishing for larger fish. (noun)
An example of chum is ground sardines tossed into the water when fishing for bass.
To chum is to go around with a good friend, or to throw cut up fish into the water to attract other fish. (verb)
A example of chum is for two close friends to spend the day together, they chum around together.
An example of chum is to throw oily fish into the ocean to attract fish you want to catch.
Oh ahahahahahahahah :lulz:
Been practicin' my ukulele and meeting new people all the fucking time lately, which hasn't only made me able to collect $4500 in ten days for the Amanda Palmer house party, but also land an ukulele gig at a fucking Fallout LARP. :lulz:
Life isn't so shitty, after all.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 11, 2012, 01:08:27 AM
Been practicin' my ukulele and meeting new people all the fucking time lately, which hasn't only made me able to collect $4500 in ten days for the Amanda Palmer house party, but also land an ukulele gig at a fucking Fallout LARP. :lulz:
Life isn't so shitty, after all.
The Doktor's work is done, here.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 11, 2012, 02:11:24 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 11, 2012, 01:08:27 AM
Been practicin' my ukulele and meeting new people all the fucking time lately, which hasn't only made me able to collect $4500 in ten days for the Amanda Palmer house party, but also land an ukulele gig at a fucking Fallout LARP. :lulz:
Life isn't so shitty, after all.
The Doktor's work is done, here.
And the Patient is more thankful than he can express with words.
Thank you, Dok.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 11, 2012, 01:08:27 AM
Been practicin' my ukulele and meeting new people all the fucking time lately, which hasn't only made me able to collect $4500 in ten days for the Amanda Palmer house party, but also land an ukulele gig at a fucking Fallout LARP. :lulz:
Life isn't so shitty, after all.
WHAT???????????
Quote from: The 3 wolf moon is a harsh SHUTUP on May 11, 2012, 02:13:55 AM
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on May 11, 2012, 01:08:27 AM
Been practicin' my ukulele and meeting new people all the fucking time lately, which hasn't only made me able to collect $4500 in ten days for the Amanda Palmer house party, but also land an ukulele gig at a fucking Fallout LARP. :lulz:
Life isn't so shitty, after all.
WHAT???????????
I know! I didn't even know that such things existed until I met these incredibly geeky BDSM people earlier today.
My brain is still full of wat.
Just catching this now. Im glad youre doing better man.
Also this holy quest not only sounds fun but apparently gets shit done. I might consider doing something similar.
Quote from: Chronicles of Twiddick on May 11, 2012, 03:27:17 AM
Just catching this now. Im glad youre doing better man.
Also this holy quest not only sounds fun but apparently gets shit done. I might consider doing something similar.
More than anything, the key to kicking depression in the nutz is overcoming the inertia. Do something. Do anything. Build a wall and then smash it down. Just don't sit there.