"Hey, Roger, I've been meaning to ask you...Have you considered using the Employee Assistance Program?"
"What for? I don't have a drinking problem or a drug problem or anything like that."
"Well...It's the way you talk to people. The way you write memos and emails, you know? It's kind of disturbing."
"What are you talking about?"
"Well, you called Mike a "fat, greasy, 12 sandwich-eating incompetent son of a bitch, for one example."
"Was I inaccurate?"
"That doesn't matter. You can't say that sort of thing."
"I can. I did."
"Well, you shouldn't."
"Why? Is the truth our enemy? Should we cloak ourselves in pleasing lies? Should we stand politely to one side, while Mike fucks up everything he waddles up to?"
"See? You're doing it again."
"Yeah, well, I am attracted to the truth. If you prefer fantasy over reality, if you prefer a dream world over the harsh realities of America in the 21st century, then perhaps YOU need Employee Assistance."
"GODDAMMIT, ROGER..."
"And maybe they can help you with that anger. It can't be good for you."
"THIS IS ABOUT YOU, NOT ME."
"NOTHING WRONG WITH ME."
"WHAT?"
"SOMETHING'S GOT TO GIVE!"
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"
"Not a Drowning Pool fan, eh?"
"LOOK, JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF MY OFFICE!"
"Okay. I'm glad we had this little talk. It's always good to get things out in the open, so nobody gets resentful or angry or anything."
"GET OOOOOOOOUT!"
*slam*
:spittake:
Sometimes I almost feel sorry for Jim. Almost. :lulz:
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 15, 2012, 06:59:08 PM
Sometimes I almost feel sorry for Jim. Almost. :lulz:
Jim's a good guy. He just has some issues.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 06:59:39 PM
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 15, 2012, 06:59:08 PM
Sometimes I almost feel sorry for Jim. Almost. :lulz:
Jim's a good guy. He just has some issues.
He really does has a good heart and good intentions, he just needs a bit of a push sometimes to get set on the right path, am I right?
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 15, 2012, 07:01:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 06:59:39 PM
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 15, 2012, 06:59:08 PM
Sometimes I almost feel sorry for Jim. Almost. :lulz:
Jim's a good guy. He just has some issues.
He really does has a good heart and good intentions, he just needs a bit of a push sometimes to get set on the right path, am I right?
Well, yes. I try to help him with that whenever I can. I feel that it is my duty as a loyal employee.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:06:27 PM
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 15, 2012, 07:01:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 06:59:39 PM
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 15, 2012, 06:59:08 PM
Sometimes I almost feel sorry for Jim. Almost. :lulz:
Jim's a good guy. He just has some issues.
He really does has a good heart and good intentions, he just needs a bit of a push sometimes to get set on the right path, am I right?
Well, yes. I try to help him with that whenever I can. I feel that it is my duty as a loyal employee.
Well, if you won't, nobody would.
Healthy realism is good for the workplace. You are doing these people a service. Quoting Drowning Pool on them doubly so.
:lulz:
I don't let myself feel bad when he yells at me. He's hurting inside.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:15:40 PM
I don't let myself feel bad when he yells at me. He's hurting inside.
You are a saint, sir.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:20:29 PM
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 15, 2012, 07:19:36 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:15:40 PM
I don't let myself feel bad when he yells at me. He's hurting inside.
You are a saint, sir.
I think he needs a HUG! :)
I bet he would LOVE a hug! But society tells him he shouldn't want, so if he struggles against your hugs of truth and purity, you should hold him tighter and tell him it's going to be okay.
:lulz:
:lulz:
Best thing I've read all day!
And make Filthy Assistant video this beautiful moment. For posterity.
:cry:
Aw, Jim. We hardly knew ye.
Quote from: Luna on June 15, 2012, 10:52:24 PM
And make Filthy Assistant video this beautiful moment. For posterity.
Seconded. This hug should resound throughout history.
O glory days of yore!
I really miss him.
Even if he hated me and everything I stand for.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 20, 2015, 03:02:22 AM
I really miss him.
Even Especially if he hated me and everything I stand for.
fixt