Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 02, 2012, 10:30:17 PM

Title: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 02, 2012, 10:30:17 PM
Remember what a travesty it was?  Nobody talked shit, they just occasionally posted their score.  One person even went so far as to say they couldn't be bothered talking trash, and would just keep track of how many they ate...To which you replied, "This isn't an orange-eating contest, it's a bunch of people sitting around quietly and eating oranges."

Well, that's happened to PD.  I don't mean you or ECH, who haven't had TIME to do shit except pop in for 10 minutes here and there, and I don't mean Cain, who has made an effort, but other than that...It's just a bunch of people listlessly staring at their monitors.  It's like watching fucking paint dry.  The only thing anyone can be arsed to do is spazz out at the aspie, which takes NO REAL EFFORT.  It can be done on autopilot. 

I don't know what the fuck this is, but it's not MY Discordia.  My Discordia doesn't look like a long-abandoned usenet node.  It doesn't look like a fucking ghost town somewhere North of Morenci.  IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE A BUNCH OF PEOPLE HAVING FUN, and if we're NOT having fun, then WHY ARE WE HERE?  To VIEW, just like what happened to the Discordian IRC?

Again...You, ECH, and Cain are aces with me.  This ain't about you.  It's about a board full of people, morosely munching on oranges.  Again.  Anyway, I'm sick of talking to an empty room, instead of talking with people, so I'll be over at Scrubgenius, hanging out with geriatric Subgeniuses, like I did before I found this place 10 years ago.  You three watch your asses, though.  When the soma runs out, these bastards will be looking at you guys and licking their chops.  It's what zombies DO.

Petulantly yours,
William Jennings Bryant

Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Internet Jesus on October 02, 2012, 11:02:08 PM
Does this count as a flounce?
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Cain on October 03, 2012, 12:15:23 AM
Naw.  This is temporary.  Temporary in the sense as being acknowledged as temporary, as opposed to a flounce, where someone is leaving FOR FOREVER (see you next week).

And we know what to do with zombies around these parts.  I know the rules.  Double-tap, cardio, check the backseat and carry plenty of shiny objects for the sake of distraction.  Also not be black (sorry Nigel, you're going to die first).
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: AFK on October 03, 2012, 12:27:17 AM
I've been pretty busy too, if it counts. 
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: hooplala on October 03, 2012, 03:30:11 AM
I'll make sure in the future to PM you my schedule for perusal, Roger.  Wouldn't want you to think I was slacking or anything.

Later skaters.
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Internet Jesus on October 03, 2012, 03:32:27 AM
Quote from: Cain on October 03, 2012, 12:15:23 AM
Naw.  This is temporary.  Temporary in the sense as being acknowledged as temporary, as opposed to a flounce, where someone is leaving FOR FOREVER (see you next week).

But if its a non-flounce predicated on a condition that we know isn't going to happen, short of Jesus giving Buddha the cure for assburgers, doesn't that count as a flounce in and of itself?

Cause Jesus ain't giving no one the cure.  Fucker's keeping it for himself.
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 03, 2012, 04:53:55 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on October 02, 2012, 10:30:17 PM
Remember what a travesty it was?  Nobody talked shit, they just occasionally posted their score.  One person even went so far as to say they couldn't be bothered talking trash, and would just keep track of how many they ate...To which you replied, "This isn't an orange-eating contest, it's a bunch of people sitting around quietly and eating oranges."

Well, that's happened to PD.  I don't mean you or ECH, who haven't had TIME to do shit except pop in for 10 minutes here and there, and I don't mean Cain, who has made an effort, but other than that...It's just a bunch of people listlessly staring at their monitors.  It's like watching fucking paint dry.  The only thing anyone can be arsed to do is spazz out at the aspie, which takes NO REAL EFFORT.  It can be done on autopilot. 

I don't know what the fuck this is, but it's not MY Discordia.  My Discordia doesn't look like a long-abandoned usenet node.  It doesn't look like a fucking ghost town somewhere North of Morenci.  IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE A BUNCH OF PEOPLE HAVING FUN, and if we're NOT having fun, then WHY ARE WE HERE?  To VIEW, just like what happened to the Discordian IRC?

Again...You, ECH, and Cain are aces with me.  This ain't about you.  It's about a board full of people, morosely munching on oranges.  Again.  Anyway, I'm sick of talking to an empty room, instead of talking with people, so I'll be over at Scrubgenius, hanging out with geriatric Subgeniuses, like I did before I found this place 10 years ago.  You three watch your asses, though.  When the soma runs out, these bastards will be looking at you guys and licking their chops.  It's what zombies DO.

Petulantly yours,
William Jennings Bryant


THIS ISN'T

      A FUCKING

                     ORANGE-EATING CONTEST


    IT'S JUST A BUNCH OF PEOPLE "PEOPLE"

           QUIETLY SITTING AROUND EATING ORANGES!!!!
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 03, 2012, 04:55:20 AM
Quote from: Cain on October 03, 2012, 12:15:23 AM
Naw.  This is temporary.  Temporary in the sense as being acknowledged as temporary, as opposed to a flounce, where someone is leaving FOR FOREVER (see you next week).

And we know what to do with zombies around these parts.  I know the rules.  Double-tap, cardio, check the backseat and carry plenty of shiny objects for the sake of distraction.  Also not be black (sorry Nigel, you're going to die first).

It's true. I'm the spunky light-skinned black best friend. There's one in every horror movie ever made, and she ALWAYS dies first.  :horrormirth:
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Signora Pæsior on October 03, 2012, 05:10:14 AM
Quote from: A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic on October 03, 2012, 04:55:20 AM
Quote from: Cain on October 03, 2012, 12:15:23 AM
Naw.  This is temporary.  Temporary in the sense as being acknowledged as temporary, as opposed to a flounce, where someone is leaving FOR FOREVER (see you next week).

And we know what to do with zombies around these parts.  I know the rules.  Double-tap, cardio, check the backseat and carry plenty of shiny objects for the sake of distraction.  Also not be black (sorry Nigel, you're going to die first).

It's true. I'm the spunky light-skinned black best friend. There's one in every horror movie ever made, and she ALWAYS dies first.  :horrormirth:

I'm curious. If someone is the spunky light-skinned black best friend, but also a virgin, do the two somehow cancel each other out and they just die off in the middle somewhere?

THIS REQUIRES FURTHER INVESTIGATION.
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: hunter s.durden on October 03, 2012, 05:11:34 AM
Quote from: Signora Paesior on October 03, 2012, 05:10:14 AM
Quote from: A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic on October 03, 2012, 04:55:20 AM
Quote from: Cain on October 03, 2012, 12:15:23 AM
Naw.  This is temporary.  Temporary in the sense as being acknowledged as temporary, as opposed to a flounce, where someone is leaving FOR FOREVER (see you next week).

And we know what to do with zombies around these parts.  I know the rules.  Double-tap, cardio, check the backseat and carry plenty of shiny objects for the sake of distraction.  Also not be black (sorry Nigel, you're going to die first).

It's true. I'm the spunky light-skinned black best friend. There's one in every horror movie ever made, and she ALWAYS dies first.  :horrormirth:

I'm curious. If someone is the spunky light-skinned black best friend, but also a virgin, do the two somehow cancel each other out and they just die off in the middle somewhere?

THIS REQUIRES FURTHER INVESTIGATION.

Raped first to neutralize virginity, then death.
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 03, 2012, 05:22:47 AM
Quote from: hunter s.durden on October 03, 2012, 05:11:34 AM
Quote from: Signora Paesior on October 03, 2012, 05:10:14 AM
Quote from: A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic on October 03, 2012, 04:55:20 AM
Quote from: Cain on October 03, 2012, 12:15:23 AM
Naw.  This is temporary.  Temporary in the sense as being acknowledged as temporary, as opposed to a flounce, where someone is leaving FOR FOREVER (see you next week).

And we know what to do with zombies around these parts.  I know the rules.  Double-tap, cardio, check the backseat and carry plenty of shiny objects for the sake of distraction.  Also not be black (sorry Nigel, you're going to die first).

It's true. I'm the spunky light-skinned black best friend. There's one in every horror movie ever made, and she ALWAYS dies first.  :horrormirth:

I'm curious. If someone is the spunky light-skinned black best friend, but also a virgin, do the two somehow cancel each other out and they just die off in the middle somewhere?

THIS REQUIRES FURTHER INVESTIGATION.

Raped first to neutralize virginity, then death.

Hm, nnnnooooo, the virgin is NEVER raped and then killed. Sometimes she succumbs to her inner Jezebel and has crazy monkey sex of her own volition, thereby rendering her impure, at which point she is killed before the very eyes of her horrified despoiler, but that's different. If the virgin is raped, it's a guarantee that the rapist will be the very next character to die, and that either she, her Knight, or her brother will be the hero that (mostly) vanquishes evil at the end of the movie.

WATCH MOAR HORROR, DUED.
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: hunter s.durden on October 03, 2012, 05:27:04 AM
Quote from: A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic on October 03, 2012, 05:22:47 AM
WATCH MOAR HORROR, DUED.

I hate most horror movies.

Would this get me killed?
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 03, 2012, 05:40:33 AM
Quote from: hunter s.durden on October 03, 2012, 05:27:04 AM
Quote from: A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic on October 03, 2012, 05:22:47 AM
WATCH MOAR HORROR, DUED.

I hate most horror movies.

Would this get me killed?

Depends on whether this means

A. you go check to see what that noise was

B. you walk away in relief after you bludgeon it to death.
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Don Coyote on October 03, 2012, 05:42:42 AM
Wasn't the last guy standing in "Night of the Living Dead" the black dude who took fucking charger only to be gunned down by a bunch of white assholes at the end?
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Luna on October 03, 2012, 11:37:50 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 03, 2012, 05:42:42 AM
Wasn't the last guy standing in "Night of the Living Dead" the black dude who took fucking charger only to be gunned down by a bunch of white assholes at the end?

Ayup.
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on October 03, 2012, 12:29:50 PM
Quote from: A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic on October 03, 2012, 04:55:20 AM
Quote from: Cain on October 03, 2012, 12:15:23 AM
Naw.  This is temporary.  Temporary in the sense as being acknowledged as temporary, as opposed to a flounce, where someone is leaving FOR FOREVER (see you next week).

And we know what to do with zombies around these parts.  I know the rules.  Double-tap, cardio, check the backseat and carry plenty of shiny objects for the sake of distraction.  Also not be black (sorry Nigel, you're going to die first).

It's true. I'm the spunky light-skinned black best friend. There's one in every horror movie ever made, and she ALWAYS dies first.  :horrormirth:

Negative. It's the couple engaging in premarital sex that get it first. Then the POC, then the stoners...

Being black is less evil than sex before marriage but more evil than drugs, according to the horror movie moral compass
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: LMNO on October 03, 2012, 01:09:02 PM
But a lot of horror movies now invert the trope, which would make Nigel an Action Girl (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ActionGirl), hopefully a Girl With A Psycho Weapon (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GirlWithPsychoWeapon) who will be Kicking Ass In All Her Finery (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/KickingAssInAllHerFinery).
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Don Coyote on October 03, 2012, 04:02:13 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on October 03, 2012, 01:09:02 PM
But a lot of horror movies now invert the trope, which would make Nigel an Action Girl (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ActionGirl), hopefully a Girl With A Psycho Weapon (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GirlWithPsychoWeapon) who will be Kicking Ass In All Her Finery (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/KickingAssInAllHerFinery).

But Nigel's finery would made of the flesh of lesser beasts and her weapon would a mighty dildo in one hand and a flensing knife in the other.
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: LMNO on October 03, 2012, 04:05:55 PM
...Naturally.  What, do I appear as some sort of unwashed heathen to you?
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Luna on October 03, 2012, 06:16:49 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 03, 2012, 04:02:13 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on October 03, 2012, 01:09:02 PM
But a lot of horror movies now invert the trope, which would make Nigel an Action Girl (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ActionGirl), hopefully a Girl With A Psycho Weapon (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GirlWithPsychoWeapon) who will be Kicking Ass In All Her Finery (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/KickingAssInAllHerFinery).

But Nigel's finery would made of the flesh of lesser beasts and her weapon would a mighty dildo in one hand and a flensing knife in the other.

Wait, I'm lost...  I thought we were discussing fiction.  This is how I see Nigel...
Title: Re: Nigel, remember the last orange-eating contest?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 03, 2012, 09:25:25 PM
 :lulz: