Im at a certain venue in cambridge with a certain soundguy we all know and love. Playing bass for daniel tonight.
Well the headline just started chewing out the soundguy on stage and brought up his smoking habits in between bands. Now it feels kinda awkward.
Anyway, some further detail now that I'm at a computer-
There's this particular soundguy, and his fondness for a particular herbal supplement is well known to Boston area musicians like LMNO and myself. Because he smells of it all the time and has this lethargic dopey look on his face by the 3rd band in.
Last night, I came in late and had to ask him for the house bass amp and the smell of it on his breath was intense. Like made me a little nauseous intense. But he's a generally likable guy and it's just something we've all come to expect from this particular venue. There's even a drinking game. Take a shot every time you see him asleep at the soundboard.
There was no lead up to it at all. Suddenly the guitarist just started shouting at him on the microphone, telling him precisely what to do with the soundboard. They played a little bit and then he shouted "ok , now bring our monitors back!" Because, well, if you shout at the soundguy from the stage, what do you imagine he'll do than fuck with your set. Well, after that song he went back to shouting at him, saying "this is what happens when you go and get stoned between each band! Was there ever a point in your life when you took pride in your job?!" Then they started another song, meanwhile, the soundguy comes up to the stage and the guitarist comes off of the stage and they're arguing.
Eventually I saw the venue staff having a conversation with the promoter while looking at a a piece of paper, meanwhile the co-headliner took over the soundboard.
Now, this was a touring band, so on the one hand it's understandable that he would get frustrated with the alternate reality that this venue sometimes is. On the other hand, this was a touring band, and you'd expect a little more tact, at least until tact was no longer an option.
The unintended consequence of this is that it seems now that Villager's brother and I have buried the hatchet. (He was the first act on)
Considering the "monitors" are pretty much vocals only, unless you're going DI, I'm not sure what they were looking for.
I can only wonder where these guys have played on their tour that, if they walk into a concrete basement that smells like old beer and piss and has a couple of half-assed stage lights, they're gonna be getting some prime sounboard action.
That place is a prime example of, "it's up to the band to get a good sound, because nothing has microphones on it."
And I try not to stand too close to that particular sound guy.
To be fair everyone on that night had some sort of computer or synthesizer going through the house. But yeah its not exactly the highest quality venue. I think the ice cubes in the urinal is a nice touch.
I dunno, if you're gonna play shitty clubs, get a separate amp for the computer, because there's no guarantee the PA will be in any shape to deal with it.
Makes sense. The more control you have over your sound the better.
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 03, 2012, 04:41:05 PM
Makes sense. The more control you have over your sound the better.
Balls. Feedback adds that extra bit of spice that makes a room full of drunks behave.
Hmm... Feedback as a means of crowd control...
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 03, 2012, 04:45:07 PM
Hmm... Feedback as a means of crowd control...
Sort of like firing a pistol into the air to "control" a herd of cattle.
:lulz:
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 03, 2012, 04:26:19 PM
I think the ice cubes in the urinal is a nice touch.
Now that i think about it: Cooling the urinal should actually work great to reduce the smell.Connect an outside (shadowy alley or even better: underground) heatsink with the sewerpipes and at least in winter you'll have less stink!
Youd think it would help reduce the smell. Youd think that the odor absorbing canisters would also assist with that.
However this particular venue exists in another universe. The normal laws that govern our universe dont exist there. It doesnt have a door. It has a wormhole that looks like a door. I suspect that universe is actually where evil musicians go when they die.
Hmm. I might riff on this when i get home.
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 03, 2012, 10:22:34 PM
Youd think it would help reduce the smell. Youd think that the odor absorbing canisters would also assist with that.
However this particular venue exists in another universe. The normal laws that govern our universe dont exist there. It doesnt have a door. It has a wormhole that looks like a door. I suspect that universe is actually where evil musicians go when they die.
Hmm. I might riff on this when i get home.
Sounds like the Strand, in Watertown, New York.
Nah. This place is the combination of an english verb indicating ability and that thing you ask the bartender to leave open for you.
Though i suppose theyre really all the same place its just that the wormhole leading between each city has a different name.
LMNO and I are once again walking down Mass Ave. We had to prove it to yet again to someone. And then once we proved it, we had to see which Side we were on.
We've been lucky. Every time so far, we've been on the Right Side. We'll find out if we still are momentarily. This walk used to make us apprehensive. We're so used to it at this point, it doesn't bother us anymore. I suppose it would be akin to getting an annual test for a life threatening disease. After a while, you try not to think about the results until they actually come in. We still have a block to go, so there's no point in worrying just yet.
We're walking, of course from the club. Which club you may be wondering but the name of it doesn't really matter so much. Every city has one. He and I are at this club frequently enough- we're both in bands and bands play at this club. Couple of times we've been at this club when neither of us were playing. That's always a dangerous thing to do, because you might end up on the Wrong Side, but sometimes you have to in order to see another band that you're friends with. You have to go for moral support. You'd be a bad friend if you didn't. They may, after all, end up on the Wrong Side, and they'll need you there to help them come to terms with it if they do. Sometimes you have to go because for some odd reason you just need to be there. That's even more dangerous. You may end up on the Wrong Side, and there will be no one there to have that goodbye for now tequila with you.
LMNO and I were both there on the same night for the just have to be there reason. Again, not a smart thing to do, but at least we were both in that mood together. It wasn't planned. We just both ran into each other there. A good thing. If either or both of us end up on the Wrong Side tonight, we can have that tequila together. Normally we'd be doing this walk at the end of the night. But we had to do it now to make sure. We just proved it after all.
One of the bands on stage had a problem with the soundguy, and the singer made a bit of a scene. We've seen it happen before, and we'll see it happen again. Doesn't happen often, but it's happened enough. Well, when they got off stage, and he's looking right pissed off and walks up to the bar, we introduce ourselves and ask him why he flipped out. LMNO and I know at this point it's because there's a 50% he's on the Wrong Side. Could be one of the band members on the Wrong Side. Could be the whole band.
He then proceeds to tell us about all of this shitty dives that they've been playing lately and maybe it's just getting to him. LMNO and I nod. We're going to have to tell him, and then we're going to have to prove it. We ask him to look around. To listen. To smell. To taste his beer. It's most certainly a dive. But it's not an ordinary dive. The rancid stench of the bathroom- that's actually considered pleasant here. The sticky beery floor is considered clean. The empty beer bottles that move of their own volition- that's not due to vibrations from the stage. The defeated look on some of the crowd, that's because they're on the Wrong Side. Does the bartender look particularly happy? Why do you think the soundguy is getting stoned every chance he can? They're on the Wrong Side.
He asks us what the hell the Wrong Side is. LMNO and I have different interpretations on the matter. He's a scientific type, I'm more of a spiritual guy. LMNO tells him that he thinks that the club is actually in an alternate reality and that the laws of physics are different here. I tell him that I think this is where bad folks who go to shows or play in bands when they die. The end result is the same- you end up on the Wrong Side, and Wrong Side was terminology that people of all creeds and philosophies could go by. If you were on the Right Side, you can enter and leave this reality/hell at will, and return to the Earth that you know and love- or should love once you know about the Wrong Side. If you're on the Wrong Side, you can never leave that reality/hell. You're stranded there. Your friends and loved ones may visit you, but you can never go home with them. And here's the thing- most people don't realize that the Wrong Side even exists until they're on it. The outside world looks pretty much the same- almost. You can even travel from city to city. Thing is though, when you're on the Wrong Side, it's all dive bars and bad gigs. That's why soundguy is stoned. He has to mix at least one Wrong Side stranded band every night. You'd get stoned too. And it's not like he can quit and run soundboard at another venue, since he's also on the Wrong Side. On the Wrong Side, it's all the same venue.
The guy of course, asks us to prove it. LMNO turns to the bartender and says "3 tequilas. We'll be back." We tell him, that once we go outside, regardless of what happens, we have to turn right and walk 3 blocks. If, after 3 blocks there is a Middle Eastern restaurant that also has live music, you're on the Right Side. If there's another dive bar, you're on the Wrong Side.
The 3 of us step out of the door and.....
It's only LMNO and I. The other guy disappeared. Whatever Side he was on, it wasn't the Side we were on. That was 2 blocks ago. If LMNO and I were on the Wrong Side this time, at least it happened to us at the same time. I think our odds are good this time. We both had good gigs the last time we played.
We do push our luck though. It's possible that we'll make it to the grave without ending up on the Wrong Side first, but every time we go to this club, those chances get slimmer.
I dodged a bullet last time we played in Brooklyn. The cinderblock walls and fucked-up PA was looking too familiar, but I was saved by a scruffy Beardo who dragged me into a Polish bar, where cranky, old, first-generation bastards fed me vodka and pints, until I made my way back to this Side.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on December 04, 2012, 01:28:07 PM
I dodged a bullet last time we played in Brooklyn. The cinderblock walls and fucked-up PA was looking too familiar, but I was saved by a scruffy Beardo who dragged me into a Polish bar, where cranky, old, first-generation bastards fed me vodka and pints, until I made my way back to this Side.
Oh, I like that!
This, incidentally, is the Wrong Side from the inside (from Bostonia's perspective. Bostonia, not Boston).
This, also, is footage of Anarchangel's very first public show, covering a song from previous band, and one of the songs that we're never doing again that I solo'd on.
This is also the last song I played with my scourge until Anarchangel finally played with the Frost Heaves... in this very venue.
LMNO, maybe we ARE on the Wrong Side.
Maybe that dude got away...
Nosferatu, as covered by Anarchangel:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIhaCo61alY
So here's another chapter in the Wrong Side series, which I just whipped up for Writing Class, real names swapped out for screen names. Not sure if I have to submit it tomorrow, but feed back is appreciated, since this one is for a graded assignment.
The gig was not going well. The band that was on before us cut into our set. The sound guy was stoned again, and was staring distantly into alternate realities from behind his mixing board. As a result, our vocals were barely audible, and the guitarist was too loud. The audience's attention was light years away, the people nothing more than faceless grey shapes, shuffling about aimlessly, gravitating toward the bar.
Amongst the empty faces, I saw Twid and LMNO talking, and apparently assessing our performance over their cheap beers. This, naturally, made me nervous. I didn't know them too well. They were both also in bands. Twid is a guitarist, and occasional bassist. LMNO is a drummer. But that's not how they knew each other. They both ascribe to the same philosophy, some sort of thing that was supposed to be absurdism masquerading as something deeper, or something deeper masquerading as absurdism. I couldn't tell which one it was, or which one it was supposed to be. Neither of them seemed particularly absurdist, but rather just a bit odd, as musicians are wont to be.
I was remembering one of their conversations now, and it unsettled me. There was this one time a band from out of town came through, and played at this same venue. They were having a night like I was having now, and apparently their regional tour was a complete disaster. The guitarist lost his temper on stage and started chewing out the sound guy, who had been smoking a lot of weed in the parking lot that night as well. After their set, Twid and LMNO struck up a conversation with him and started telling him how this club was actually some sort of portal into another world, and that if you fell into it, you could never get out. People could visit you, but you could never leave. All the bars were the same in this other world. They called it the Wrong Side. They said they saw it happen all the time, and that in order to find out, you would have to go down the street and look at all the other bars. There were better venues a few blocks down, of course, and that was presumably how you could find out if you were on the Wrong Side.
They told the man that they would take him for a walk, and if they discovered that he was on the Wrong Side, they would come back and do a round of tequila with him. Apparently tequila was the consolatory beverage, part of an initiation into some sort of musician's parody of the Fields of Asphodel. I figured they were just trying to mess with him and get him to laugh. They did have tequila that night though, and told him that they were sorry. They did look sorry for him.
We finished up our set, and after we got all of our gear off of the stage, I told the guys I was going out for a smoke. The night was cloudy and the lights of Cambridge gave everything a lurid glow. I felt cold, a rarity when you go outside just after a performance. Even in winter you could usually go outside in a long sleeved shirt and still be fairly warm. Musicians often do go outside right after they break down, for a bit of relief from their own body heat. I shivered, and wondered if it was actually cold enough to deter the smokers from coming outside. I figured that I would walk for a few blocks to warm up while I finished my cigarette.
I finished my cigarette, went back to the venue, and had another before going back inside. I went down the stairs, and told my band mates I'd have a couple of beers with them shortly. As I walked up to the bar, Twid and LMNO were having a conversation about, of all things, quantum physics. Twid looked perplexed, and LMNO, whose father was evidently a physicist, was trying to explain some aspect of it to him. I walked in between them, apologized for the intrusion, and ordered three tequilas.