So, one of my daughter's friend's got kicked out of her aunt's house for skipping school.
This is a sweet kid, not some asshole truant. Plus, she's wicked smart and she deserves the support to get through high school and go to college.
She's staying with us right now and I'm going to try to get legal guardianship so I can get her health coverage and sign off on her school documents.
This supports my Nigel/Kali hypothesis, of course.
I predict with some confidence that everyone in Portland will live at Nigel's house by this time next year, and that when that time doubles, everyone on Earth will live at Nigel's house. All 7.35 Bn of them, trying to agree on what's good for dinner.
Ugh. That really is incredibly awesome of you Nigel. She kicks her niece out because (theoretically) she's mad about her skipping school which would affect her performance. Because kicking a teenager out is really going to give them that stability and focus to keep up with their school work.
Quote from: trippinprincezz13 on February 01, 2013, 08:44:49 PM
Ugh. That really is incredibly awesome of you Nigel. She kicks her niece out because (theoretically) she's mad about her skipping school which would affect her performance. Because kicking a teenager out is really going to give them that stability and focus to keep up with their school work.
It comes back to parenting. Why put the effort into it, when you can either throw up your hands at a supposedly hopeless task (one motivation), be draconian as hell to show that kid a thing or two (another possible motivation), or just rid yourself of the kid so you can pretend you're 25 again (another possible motivation)?
Some of the greatest kids have the shittiest parents. The chickenshit gene seems to skip generations.
Nigel, as much as you have on your plate already means you triple ROCK for this.
God, this is awesome of you Nigel.
Nigel, you are AWESOME.
West Coast Supermom ftw!
<3
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 01, 2013, 08:31:23 PM
This supports my Nigel/Kali hypothesis, of course.
I predict with some confidence that everyone in Portland will live at Nigel's house by this time next year, and that when that time doubles, everyone on Earth will live at Nigel's house. All 7.35 Bn of them, trying to agree on what's good for dinner.
They get spaghetti and like it, or they can make their own.
Thanks, guys. <3
I have yet to learn whether auntie will sign over guardianship, but I've spoken with DHS and they assure me that there are ways around it if she won't.
SPAGHETTI NIGHT AT NIGEL'S!
*looks for flights*
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on February 01, 2013, 10:30:55 PM
Thanks, guys. <3
I have yet to learn whether auntie will sign over guardianship, but I've spoken with DHS and they assure me that there are ways around it if she won't.
If she won't care enough to play the parenting role in the absence of the parents, then who better than someone actually willing?
I would just get worried about her having to go into some sort of foster custody or something, but I don't know how it works.
Quote from: Suu on February 01, 2013, 10:35:26 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on February 01, 2013, 10:30:55 PM
Thanks, guys. <3
I have yet to learn whether auntie will sign over guardianship, but I've spoken with DHS and they assure me that there are ways around it if she won't.
If she won't care enough to play the parenting role in the absence of the parents, then who better than someone actually willing?
I would just get worried about her having to go into some sort of foster custody or something, but I don't know how it works.
I was concerned about that, but from speaking with DHS that won't really be a concern. The only way it would be was if she were placed in state care due to neglect, which is an issue I
could force because of the abandonment, but if they won't give me guardianship the other angle is that she can file for emancipation, and then she can get food stamps and OHP under her own agency, and live with me.
Nigel. I love you. You're awesome.
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on February 01, 2013, 11:21:36 PM
Quote from: Suu on February 01, 2013, 10:35:26 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on February 01, 2013, 10:30:55 PM
Thanks, guys. <3
I have yet to learn whether auntie will sign over guardianship, but I've spoken with DHS and they assure me that there are ways around it if she won't.
If she won't care enough to play the parenting role in the absence of the parents, then who better than someone actually willing?
I would just get worried about her having to go into some sort of foster custody or something, but I don't know how it works.
I was concerned about that, but from speaking with DHS that won't really be a concern. The only way it would be was if she were placed in state care due to neglect, which is an issue I could force because of the abandonment, but if they won't give me guardianship the other angle is that she can file for emancipation, and then she can get food stamps and OHP under her own agency, and live with me.
How old is she, if you don't mind me asking?
Quote from: Suu on February 01, 2013, 11:39:01 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on February 01, 2013, 11:21:36 PM
Quote from: Suu on February 01, 2013, 10:35:26 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on February 01, 2013, 10:30:55 PM
Thanks, guys. <3
I have yet to learn whether auntie will sign over guardianship, but I've spoken with DHS and they assure me that there are ways around it if she won't.
If she won't care enough to play the parenting role in the absence of the parents, then who better than someone actually willing?
I would just get worried about her having to go into some sort of foster custody or something, but I don't know how it works.
I was concerned about that, but from speaking with DHS that won't really be a concern. The only way it would be was if she were placed in state care due to neglect, which is an issue I could force because of the abandonment, but if they won't give me guardianship the other angle is that she can file for emancipation, and then she can get food stamps and OHP under her own agency, and live with me.
How old is she, if you don't mind me asking?
She's 16.
Crap, is EFT that old already too? :eek:
Also, at that age she should be able to have a say. I hope, anyway.
Quote from: Suu on February 02, 2013, 02:03:00 AM
Crap, is EFT that old already too? :eek:
Also, at that age she should be able to have a say. I hope, anyway.
EFO is 15.
Legally, in Oregon she doesn't really get a "say", per se, but DHS told me that if she chooses to stay with me there isn't much anyone can do about it except call DHS, who would promptly investigate everyone involved. So, yeah. The main thing I'm worried about is being able to handle her medical and school stuff, and get her on my food stamps so I can feed her.
Well, aside from dumb phone typos on my part, I hope it works in your favors.
Thank you! I think it will.
It will. :wink:
The biggest obstacle is to get her to a point where she believes that she can really live here and is part of the family. Backstory: Mom's in Virginia, likes to get drunk and punch her in the face. Dad's in Portland, apparently not a bad guy, but is inexplicably incapable of raising a child. So she was living with her aunt, who has legal guardianship.
She's deathly afraid of ovens, and I'm afraid to ask.
I had her over for Yule, and she about broke my heart because she said it was the first time she'd felt like part of a family for years. She is incredibly smart, sweet, responsible, and articulate.
So, yeah. I love this girl and I want to raise her if I can. She's almost grown up in some ways but I think she might be able to use a couple of extra years to make up for the ones she lost not being nurtured by anybody.
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on February 02, 2013, 05:47:22 AM
The biggest obstacle is to get her to a point where she believes that she can really live here and is part of the family. Backstory: Mom's in Virginia, likes to get drunk and punch her in the face. Dad's in Portland, apparently not a bad guy, but is inexplicably incapable of raising a child. So she was living with her aunt, who has legal guardianship.
She's deathly afraid of ovens, and I'm afraid to ask.
I had her over for Yule, and she about broke my heart because she said it was the first time she'd felt like part of a family for years. She is incredibly smart, sweet, responsible, and articulate.
So, yeah. I love this girl and I want to raise her if I can. She's almost grown up in some ways but I think she might be able to use a couple of extra years to make up for the ones she lost not being nurtured by anybody.
Well, remember that whole conversation we had about "resiliency"?
Fucked up childhood + better teenage years > fucked up childhood + fucked up teenage years.
Well done, Nigel.
Thanks, Roger! :) I am hoping that it can be better enough that she does OK as an adult.
Holy balls, Nigel, you never do a small kindness when a HUGE one would serve better, huh?
I heart you. Marry me.
Aw, thanks. :)
The Crazy Mom (if you remember from a few weeks back... Mrs. "I would just appreciate it if you just didn't let him smoke pot at your house") is wigging out about it. Note: This is NOT my child's mother, but her boyfriend's mother, who is certifiable. Her son was hanging out here again so I explained that NGO was staying here, and she was all snarkily "If you aren't going to call DHS please let me know so I can". I told her that I had already spoken to the police, would be speaking with DHS, and am looking into fostering (I was; now I'm looking into adoption) and she is not happy. :lol:
I am going to have to have a serious conversation with her about my concerns that her son is a "bad influence" on my daughter. And I'm looking forward to it, too.
Amazing. That's a thing you are.
Also, sounds like crazy mom could give a few lulzy tales! Keep us updated?
Naturally.